Gyrru Trwy Storom O'r Galon
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Transcript
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-Subtitles | 0:00:00 | 0:00:00 | |
-Subtitles - -Subtitles | 0:00:00 | 0:00:02 | |
-Do you want to sleep now, gang? | 0:00:02 | 0:00:04 | |
-I'm Alaw Griffiths, and I'm a mother -of two young children. | 0:00:08 | 0:00:12 | |
-I run a wedding planning business... | 0:00:13 | 0:00:16 | |
-..and I'm married to Hywel, -who's a lecturer and a poet. | 0:00:16 | 0:00:20 | |
-We appear to be a perfect family, -a normal family. | 0:00:23 | 0:00:28 | |
-But I've been battling -postnatal depression. | 0:00:28 | 0:00:33 | |
-I've had some very dark periods -since the children were born. | 0:00:37 | 0:00:41 | |
-There's also a stigma -about the condition. | 0:00:47 | 0:00:50 | |
-I'm afraid. | 0:00:53 | 0:00:55 | |
-Afraid that people -will think I'm attention-seeking... | 0:00:55 | 0:01:00 | |
-..or that I'm a complete freak. | 0:01:00 | 0:01:03 | |
-I don't know. | 0:01:05 | 0:01:06 | |
-So many confusing things -go through my mind. | 0:01:07 | 0:01:10 | |
-I don't want... | 0:01:18 | 0:01:20 | |
-..to be sad. | 0:01:22 | 0:01:23 | |
-I want to be happy. | 0:01:23 | 0:01:25 | |
-Here you are, Morgan. | 0:01:39 | 0:01:41 | |
-Food. | 0:01:42 | 0:01:43 | |
-Hywel and I had just got married. | 0:01:44 | 0:01:47 | |
-Where has Lleucu gone? There she is! | 0:01:48 | 0:01:50 | |
-We wanted children. | 0:01:52 | 0:01:54 | |
-I was very lucky -and got pregnant with Lleucu Haf. | 0:01:55 | 0:01:59 | |
-You haven't had pudding? | 0:01:59 | 0:02:01 | |
-Pudding with breakfast? | 0:02:01 | 0:02:03 | |
-We were tremendously happy. | 0:02:05 | 0:02:08 | |
-The birth was fine, as births go. | 0:02:09 | 0:02:15 | |
-Lleucu Haf was born in water. | 0:02:15 | 0:02:19 | |
-I remember opening my eyes... | 0:02:19 | 0:02:21 | |
-..and seeing two dark eyes -looking up at me through the water. | 0:02:21 | 0:02:26 | |
-I was the first one to hold Lleucu. | 0:02:29 | 0:02:33 | |
-That was wonderful. | 0:02:33 | 0:02:35 | |
-Looking back... | 0:02:36 | 0:02:38 | |
-..I know something wasn't right -even then. | 0:02:38 | 0:02:43 | |
-Like a switch within me. | 0:02:44 | 0:02:46 | |
-That's the only way -I can describe it, really. | 0:02:47 | 0:02:50 | |
-It never crossed my mind -that I'd be depressed in any way... | 0:02:51 | 0:02:57 | |
-..after giving birth to a baby. | 0:02:57 | 0:03:00 | |
-Lleucu was perfect. | 0:03:00 | 0:03:02 | |
-I was alright. | 0:03:02 | 0:03:03 | |
-So, why did I have these feelings? | 0:03:03 | 0:03:06 | |
-It still doesn't make -much sense to me... | 0:03:07 | 0:03:10 | |
-..and it's very difficult -to get my head around it all. | 0:03:10 | 0:03:15 | |
-You can go now, Lleucs, -and Mam will come after you. | 0:03:16 | 0:03:20 | |
-Once we reached the ward -with other mothers and babies... | 0:03:36 | 0:03:41 | |
-..there were a great many notes. | 0:03:41 | 0:03:45 | |
-"Alaw very anxious -of being alone with baby." | 0:03:47 | 0:03:51 | |
-Looking back, the depression -had kicked in fairly quickly. | 0:03:52 | 0:03:57 | |
-It took a long time... | 0:03:58 | 0:04:01 | |
-..for the love and the bond -with Lleucs to fully develop. | 0:04:02 | 0:04:07 | |
-In 2016, Morgan came into the world. | 0:04:11 | 0:04:14 | |
-I was so grateful and happy... | 0:04:15 | 0:04:17 | |
-..to welcome the newest member -of our little family. | 0:04:17 | 0:04:20 | |
-When I was pregnant with Morgan... | 0:04:21 | 0:04:24 | |
-..it was a different experience... | 0:04:24 | 0:04:27 | |
-..because I was trying to deal -with the anxieties about the birth. | 0:04:27 | 0:04:33 | |
-As with Lleucu's birth, -some things didn't go to plan. | 0:04:35 | 0:04:39 | |
-I had to undergo emergency surgery. | 0:04:39 | 0:04:42 | |
-Once we passed through that -and I was starting to recover... | 0:04:43 | 0:04:48 | |
-..I think that I was -the happiest I've ever been. | 0:04:49 | 0:04:53 | |
-It's hard now, looking back... | 0:04:53 | 0:04:56 | |
-..because I want that back. | 0:04:56 | 0:04:59 | |
-At that time, a lot of people asked -how I was, and how the baby was. | 0:05:01 | 0:05:06 | |
-I always answered, -"I'm great, thanks very much." | 0:05:07 | 0:05:10 | |
-But I wasn't naive enough -to think... | 0:05:10 | 0:05:13 | |
-..that I couldn't slip back -into the darkness. | 0:05:14 | 0:05:17 | |
-By now... | 0:05:19 | 0:05:21 | |
-..most people -have stopped asking how I am. | 0:05:22 | 0:05:25 | |
-And, unfortunately, I'm not great. | 0:05:27 | 0:05:30 | |
-OK. | 0:05:32 | 0:05:33 | |
-Unfortunately, -a few weeks after Morgan's birth... | 0:05:35 | 0:05:39 | |
-..the depression returned, -which was a huge disappointment. | 0:05:39 | 0:05:43 | |
-I decided to try CBT, -cognitive behavioural therapy... | 0:05:44 | 0:05:49 | |
-..as a way of dealing -with the illness. | 0:05:50 | 0:05:52 | |
-For the first sessions, -no cameras are allowed. | 0:05:53 | 0:05:57 | |
-I've just... | 0:06:04 | 0:06:05 | |
-I've just come out -of the first appointment. | 0:06:13 | 0:06:17 | |
-They asked lots of questions. | 0:06:17 | 0:06:20 | |
-"Give me five reasons -why you think you're a good mum." | 0:06:20 | 0:06:26 | |
-I couldn't answer her. | 0:06:29 | 0:06:31 | |
-Um... | 0:06:31 | 0:06:32 | |
-Um... | 0:06:34 | 0:06:35 | |
-Then I remembered... | 0:06:40 | 0:06:42 | |
-..that I cooked... | 0:06:44 | 0:06:46 | |
-..a family meal last night. | 0:06:47 | 0:06:50 | |
-It might sound a bit silly... | 0:06:53 | 0:06:55 | |
-..something so small. | 0:06:56 | 0:06:58 | |
-Everyone cooks for their family. | 0:06:58 | 0:07:00 | |
-But for me, -it was quite a big thing. | 0:07:00 | 0:07:03 | |
-So, yes, I could give one reason. | 0:07:04 | 0:07:06 | |
-According to MIND, one in five women -suffers from mental illness... | 0:07:09 | 0:07:14 | |
-..either during or after pregnancy. | 0:07:14 | 0:07:17 | |
-Not many people -speak about the condition. | 0:07:19 | 0:07:22 | |
-Personally, being able to discuss it -with other people was important. | 0:07:22 | 0:07:26 | |
-That's why I decided -to edit and contribute... | 0:07:27 | 0:07:30 | |
-..to the book Gyrru Drwy Storom. | 0:07:30 | 0:07:32 | |
-It's a collection of the experiences -of individuals... | 0:07:32 | 0:07:36 | |
-..who have suffered mental illness. | 0:07:36 | 0:07:39 | |
-When I was writing this... | 0:07:42 | 0:07:45 | |
-..I was on the verge of pulling out. | 0:07:46 | 0:07:48 | |
-..because I just felt -that people would think... | 0:07:49 | 0:07:53 | |
-..that I was being dramatic. | 0:07:53 | 0:07:56 | |
-I certainly felt -that I was being dramatic. | 0:07:57 | 0:08:00 | |
-I do have that tendency! | 0:08:00 | 0:08:03 | |
-A bit of a drama queen! | 0:08:04 | 0:08:05 | |
-When I first went... | 0:08:07 | 0:08:09 | |
-..and I went private, -at first, to a therapist. | 0:08:09 | 0:08:13 | |
-Beca would have been six months old -or thereabouts. | 0:08:14 | 0:08:17 | |
-By then, my family was telling me -that I needed to see someone. | 0:08:17 | 0:08:21 | |
-What I found difficult... | 0:08:23 | 0:08:25 | |
-..was that it didn't happen -to me immediately. | 0:08:25 | 0:08:28 | |
-People are familiar -with postnatal depression. | 0:08:29 | 0:08:33 | |
-But it didn't hit me -for about six months to a year. | 0:08:33 | 0:08:37 | |
-I was at my worst -when the baby was a year old. | 0:08:37 | 0:08:40 | |
-I thought that couldn't be -postnatal depression. | 0:08:40 | 0:08:44 | |
-It was almost a year later. | 0:08:44 | 0:08:47 | |
-To some extent, in my case... | 0:08:48 | 0:08:50 | |
-..the anxiety element -was worse than the depression. | 0:08:50 | 0:08:54 | |
-I worried about everything. | 0:08:54 | 0:08:56 | |
-Some nights, -I wouldn't sleep at all. | 0:08:56 | 0:08:59 | |
-I found it hard to differentiate -between the condition's symptoms... | 0:08:59 | 0:09:05 | |
-..and what would be normal anyway. | 0:09:05 | 0:09:09 | |
-There's a range of symptoms. | 0:09:10 | 0:09:12 | |
-People need to be aware... | 0:09:13 | 0:09:14 | |
-..that it affects individuals -in completely different ways. | 0:09:15 | 0:09:19 | |
-Postnatal depression affects -different women in different ways. | 0:09:20 | 0:09:25 | |
-I spoke about the condition with -psychiatrist Dr Elin Ellis Jones. | 0:09:26 | 0:09:31 | |
-There are actually -three different conditions. | 0:09:33 | 0:09:36 | |
-We're talking about one, -which is the depression. | 0:09:37 | 0:09:41 | |
-There's another condition... | 0:09:41 | 0:09:43 | |
-..that affects most women, -probably as many as 85%... | 0:09:43 | 0:09:47 | |
-..in the first week. | 0:09:47 | 0:09:49 | |
-They feel that their emotions -are all over the place. | 0:09:49 | 0:09:53 | |
-What's known as the blues. | 0:09:53 | 0:09:55 | |
-Women will tell you -that it feels very hormonal. | 0:09:55 | 0:09:59 | |
-That it's similar -to how they feel before a period. | 0:09:59 | 0:10:03 | |
-The third condition -is postpartum psychosis... | 0:10:03 | 0:10:07 | |
-..which is very serious. | 0:10:07 | 0:10:09 | |
-Mothers lose their grip on reality. | 0:10:09 | 0:10:13 | |
-Thankfully, it's very rare. | 0:10:14 | 0:10:17 | |
-The most common condition, -apart from the blues... | 0:10:17 | 0:10:22 | |
-..is postnatal depression. | 0:10:22 | 0:10:24 | |
-There are anxiety symptoms -and obsessive symptoms. | 0:10:25 | 0:10:29 | |
-Fears that you may harm the baby -in some way... | 0:10:30 | 0:10:33 | |
-..even though you know deep down... | 0:10:33 | 0:10:36 | |
-..that what you're seeing -or hearing isn't real. | 0:10:36 | 0:10:40 | |
-One in eight women suffer from it. | 0:10:40 | 0:10:43 | |
-There are expectations... | 0:10:56 | 0:10:58 | |
-My grandmother said she was glad -not to be raising children now... | 0:10:59 | 0:11:04 | |
-..because there's so much criticism. | 0:11:04 | 0:11:07 | |
-Online, there are thousands -of voices telling you what to do. | 0:11:07 | 0:11:11 | |
-You lose your own voice. | 0:11:12 | 0:11:13 | |
-That's what a new mother is doing. | 0:11:13 | 0:11:16 | |
-She's trying to find -her own voice as a mother. | 0:11:16 | 0:11:20 | |
-I'd post one photo on Facebook of -children looking happy on a beach. | 0:11:20 | 0:11:25 | |
-There are a hundred other photos... | 0:11:25 | 0:11:28 | |
-..where they've argued -or are in tears... | 0:11:28 | 0:11:31 | |
-..or have fallen or whatever. | 0:11:31 | 0:11:33 | |
-We don't help each other. | 0:11:33 | 0:11:35 | |
-There are times in every family... | 0:11:35 | 0:11:37 | |
-..when you go, what are we doing?! | 0:11:38 | 0:11:40 | |
-When two out of three are crying, -and there's no supper. | 0:11:41 | 0:11:45 | |
-Weetabix for supper now and then -isn't going to do them any harm. | 0:11:46 | 0:11:51 | |
-A big kiss, and bed -without brushing their teeth. | 0:11:52 | 0:11:55 | |
-There, I've said it. | 0:11:55 | 0:11:57 | |
-I feel as if I'm fighting every day. | 0:12:02 | 0:12:07 | |
-I have to fight my way -to the next task. | 0:12:08 | 0:12:10 | |
-Picking up Lleucu from school. | 0:12:12 | 0:12:14 | |
-Next task - go home. | 0:12:14 | 0:12:15 | |
-Next task - make tea. | 0:12:16 | 0:12:17 | |
-That's a common occurrence. | 0:12:17 | 0:12:20 | |
-But this thing that has me -in its clutches at the moment... | 0:12:20 | 0:12:25 | |
-..goes a step further. | 0:12:26 | 0:12:28 | |
-It makes me feel like a bad mother. | 0:12:31 | 0:12:34 | |
-This fatigue... | 0:12:35 | 0:12:37 | |
-I feel as if I'm being suffocated. | 0:12:42 | 0:12:44 | |
-. | 0:12:50 | 0:12:50 | |
-* | 0:12:53 | 0:12:53 | |
-I'm Alaw Griffiths and I've suffered -from postnatal depression... | 0:12:53 | 0:12:57 | |
-..after having my children, -Lleucu and Morgan. | 0:12:58 | 0:13:01 | |
-More than once, I've asked why me? | 0:13:01 | 0:13:03 | |
-I've also often felt that people -don't understand the condition. | 0:13:03 | 0:13:08 | |
-Brighten up! | 0:13:09 | 0:13:10 | |
-Cheer up! | 0:13:11 | 0:13:12 | |
-It'll be better tomorrow! | 0:13:12 | 0:13:14 | |
-That doesn't help. | 0:13:14 | 0:13:16 | |
-I can be fine one minute... | 0:13:16 | 0:13:18 | |
-..then something is said, -and that's it. | 0:13:18 | 0:13:22 | |
-I just can't deal -with the situation. | 0:13:22 | 0:13:25 | |
-When you're in that place, -right in the thick of it... | 0:13:31 | 0:13:35 | |
-..you just don't see a way out. | 0:13:37 | 0:13:38 | |
-One of the things that scares me... | 0:13:48 | 0:13:51 | |
-..is my responsibility as a mother -to care for these two little ones. | 0:13:51 | 0:13:56 | |
-When I have a bad day, -I don't want that responsibility. | 0:13:57 | 0:14:01 | |
-When I wake up in the morning... | 0:14:04 | 0:14:06 | |
-..what I hear first... | 0:14:07 | 0:14:09 | |
-..like most parents, I suppose... | 0:14:09 | 0:14:11 | |
-..is the children. | 0:14:12 | 0:14:13 | |
-Usually, if it's Morgan... | 0:14:14 | 0:14:16 | |
-..it's the sound of crying. | 0:14:16 | 0:14:18 | |
-I don't want to hear it. | 0:14:19 | 0:14:21 | |
-I don't want -to spend the day with them. | 0:14:23 | 0:14:27 | |
-One of those situations -where I find it very difficult... | 0:14:33 | 0:14:38 | |
-..to control my own emotions -is when Morgan is crying. | 0:14:38 | 0:14:41 | |
-I remember one occasion... | 0:14:42 | 0:14:44 | |
-..laying on the bed, -with him next to me. | 0:14:44 | 0:14:47 | |
-He just cried and cried. | 0:14:47 | 0:14:49 | |
-I'd tried everything. | 0:14:49 | 0:14:51 | |
-I had to leave him there... | 0:14:51 | 0:14:53 | |
-..and get out of the room because... | 0:14:53 | 0:14:56 | |
-This is going to sound awful. | 0:14:56 | 0:14:58 | |
-I wanted to throw him -out of the window. | 0:14:58 | 0:15:01 | |
-I was driving earlier... | 0:15:03 | 0:15:04 | |
-..and thinking, -I just want to carry on driving. | 0:15:04 | 0:15:08 | |
-I just want to drive, drive, drive. | 0:15:08 | 0:15:11 | |
-I don't really want to go back. | 0:15:11 | 0:15:13 | |
-Then I thought, -what kind of mother thinks that? | 0:15:15 | 0:15:19 | |
-What kind of mother -just wants to go? | 0:15:20 | 0:15:23 | |
-Having intrusive thoughts -is very common... | 0:15:33 | 0:15:37 | |
-..when you're suffering -from depression. | 0:15:37 | 0:15:40 | |
-But I have to learn -how to live with them. | 0:15:41 | 0:15:43 | |
-I'm going for another CBT session. | 0:15:44 | 0:15:47 | |
-This stage of the process -focuses on these intrusive thoughts. | 0:15:47 | 0:15:52 | |
-This happens to everyone. | 0:15:52 | 0:15:54 | |
-When you cry -or something's annoying... | 0:15:54 | 0:15:57 | |
-..these things pop into your head, -and you have no control over them. | 0:15:57 | 0:16:02 | |
-You don't choose -to have these thoughts. | 0:16:02 | 0:16:05 | |
-For instance, -if he's crying in the car... | 0:16:05 | 0:16:10 | |
-..this will sound ridiculous... | 0:16:11 | 0:16:14 | |
-.. if he stops crying, -I think he's died. | 0:16:14 | 0:16:17 | |
-Then I'll stop the car -and check that he's breathing... | 0:16:19 | 0:16:24 | |
-..then carry on, and feel like... | 0:16:24 | 0:16:26 | |
-..a right lemon... | 0:16:28 | 0:16:29 | |
-..basically. | 0:16:29 | 0:16:30 | |
-But then... | 0:16:31 | 0:16:32 | |
-..that carries forward, -and it's really upsetting. | 0:16:34 | 0:16:37 | |
-Yes, OK. | 0:16:38 | 0:16:39 | |
-So, you're saying -that other people just let it go. | 0:16:39 | 0:16:44 | |
-I've reached the point where I'm -more able to discuss situations. | 0:16:44 | 0:16:48 | |
-I have steps in place -to help me deal with them. | 0:16:49 | 0:16:52 | |
-Let's try this then. | 0:16:52 | 0:16:55 | |
-I tell you this. | 0:16:55 | 0:16:56 | |
-When my daughter was small... | 0:16:56 | 0:16:58 | |
-..I had a thought about throwing her -in the river and leaving her. | 0:16:59 | 0:17:03 | |
-Would you think I'm a bad person -for even deciding to think that? | 0:17:03 | 0:17:07 | |
-No, because it always happens to me. | 0:17:08 | 0:17:10 | |
-No, because it always happens to me. - -If it's OK for them, it is for you. | 0:17:10 | 0:17:12 | |
-94% of people -have intrusive thoughts... | 0:17:14 | 0:17:18 | |
-..but most know -how to get rid of them. | 0:17:18 | 0:17:21 | |
-Allowing the thoughts to take over -is a common symptom... | 0:17:22 | 0:17:25 | |
-..among women who suffer -from postnatal depression. | 0:17:26 | 0:17:29 | |
-It's interesting -that these intrusive thoughts... | 0:17:32 | 0:17:36 | |
-..can be the same sort of thing. | 0:17:36 | 0:17:38 | |
-As a mother, -you're always protecting your child. | 0:17:39 | 0:17:42 | |
-Don't go near the fire. -Watch that hot water. | 0:17:42 | 0:17:45 | |
-Mind this, mind that. | 0:17:45 | 0:17:47 | |
-We turn those fears... | 0:17:48 | 0:17:49 | |
-In a way, -they're a sign of a good mother. | 0:17:50 | 0:17:53 | |
-A good mother protects her child. | 0:17:53 | 0:17:56 | |
-When the mind is unwell... | 0:17:56 | 0:17:59 | |
-..she turns those fears -into things she could do herself. | 0:17:59 | 0:18:03 | |
-It is a phenomenon, -but it's also a symptom. | 0:18:03 | 0:18:08 | |
-When someone is -in that dark place... | 0:18:11 | 0:18:15 | |
-..I can't see a way out. | 0:18:15 | 0:18:17 | |
-I just go into a state -of total panic. | 0:18:18 | 0:18:22 | |
-I think the only one -who really sees that is Hywel. | 0:18:23 | 0:18:26 | |
-I don't think anyone else -sees that Alaw. | 0:18:28 | 0:18:32 | |
-On a practical level, pressure -often falls on the other person. | 0:18:36 | 0:18:41 | |
-Everything still needs to be done... | 0:18:42 | 0:18:45 | |
-..to make sure -that life goes on, as it were. | 0:18:45 | 0:18:48 | |
-There are certain periods -when the strain is immense. | 0:18:48 | 0:18:52 | |
-They may be everyday things. | 0:18:53 | 0:18:55 | |
-That's when things get hard... | 0:18:55 | 0:18:57 | |
-..because the pressure -falls on one person. | 0:18:57 | 0:19:00 | |
-You don't know how much to do. | 0:19:00 | 0:19:02 | |
-Or maybe it would be more helpful... | 0:19:02 | 0:19:06 | |
-..to encourage people -to do more themselves. | 0:19:06 | 0:19:09 | |
-I try to do more of that now. | 0:19:10 | 0:19:13 | |
-Ultimately, -I know that it doesn't help me. | 0:19:13 | 0:19:16 | |
-But Hywel puts up with a lot. | 0:19:18 | 0:19:21 | |
-A great deal. | 0:19:21 | 0:19:22 | |
-What I need to do... | 0:19:23 | 0:19:24 | |
-..is just accept that it's happening -and be supportive... | 0:19:25 | 0:19:29 | |
-..then maybe try to talk about it. | 0:19:30 | 0:19:34 | |
-At first, I tried -to think it through logically. | 0:19:34 | 0:19:38 | |
-I tried to find the reason for it. | 0:19:38 | 0:19:40 | |
-But it's actually something -very complex to understand. | 0:19:41 | 0:19:45 | |
-It's very hard -to see someone you love... | 0:19:47 | 0:19:51 | |
-..going through that pain, -as it were... | 0:19:52 | 0:19:55 | |
-..and failing to cope -with certain situations. | 0:19:55 | 0:19:58 | |
-I think that the threat of it -can make it worse. | 0:20:01 | 0:20:05 | |
-Once you understand it -on your terms... | 0:20:06 | 0:20:08 | |
-..it takes the power away from it. | 0:20:09 | 0:20:11 | |
-That's the purpose -of discussing it openly. | 0:20:12 | 0:20:14 | |
-Once you take its power away... | 0:20:15 | 0:20:17 | |
-..it isn't a threat any more. | 0:20:17 | 0:20:19 | |
-You know what it is. | 0:20:20 | 0:20:21 | |
-You can cope, you can get help. | 0:20:22 | 0:20:24 | |
-What really helped me... | 0:20:25 | 0:20:26 | |
-..was being in the company -of other people. | 0:20:27 | 0:20:30 | |
-I was afraid to be alone. | 0:20:30 | 0:20:32 | |
-The healing process -is different for everyone. | 0:20:32 | 0:20:35 | |
-It can take a long time. | 0:20:36 | 0:20:37 | |
-I think -that the most important thing... | 0:20:37 | 0:20:40 | |
-..is to learn -to be kind to yourself. | 0:20:40 | 0:20:44 | |
-To some extent, I feel -that I'm still getting better. | 0:20:45 | 0:20:49 | |
-I think I can honestly say that -I wouldn't change the experience. | 0:20:50 | 0:20:54 | |
-Despite how dark -and hideous it was... | 0:20:55 | 0:20:58 | |
-..it's a part of your life, -but it's not your whole life. | 0:20:59 | 0:21:03 | |
-It's a part, -but there's so much more. | 0:21:03 | 0:21:06 | |
-So much fun. | 0:21:06 | 0:21:07 | |
-So much joy as a family as well. | 0:21:07 | 0:21:10 | |
-So many other things. | 0:21:10 | 0:21:12 | |
-It's something -that I'm happy to share... | 0:21:14 | 0:21:16 | |
-..but also happy -to leave behind, I think. | 0:21:17 | 0:21:20 | |
-It's difficult... | 0:21:25 | 0:21:26 | |
-..to describe how you feel... | 0:21:28 | 0:21:30 | |
-..because I can't show it. | 0:21:31 | 0:21:33 | |
-I go to see people. | 0:21:35 | 0:21:36 | |
-They teach me -to think in a different way... | 0:21:37 | 0:21:40 | |
-..because I need that help. | 0:21:41 | 0:21:43 | |
-I'm not ashamed of saying that, -but a lot of people are. | 0:21:44 | 0:21:49 | |
-People are ashamed... | 0:21:51 | 0:21:52 | |
-..because of society. | 0:21:54 | 0:21:57 | |
-We need to be educated -and we need to educate others. | 0:21:59 | 0:22:04 | |
-"We meet where poems cannot reach us | 0:22:07 | 0:22:10 | |
-"Through the pain that has no rhyme. | 0:22:11 | 0:22:13 | |
-"My muse cannot find a name | 0:22:14 | 0:22:15 | |
-"For this crag -that stands between us. | 0:22:15 | 0:22:18 | |
-"Two who are separate, free beings | 0:22:21 | 0:22:24 | |
-"Islands embracing each other | 0:22:25 | 0:22:27 | |
-"In the great motionless tide | 0:22:28 | 0:22:30 | |
-"Before the blockade -of the day's waves. | 0:22:30 | 0:22:33 | |
-"That's what we are, -but we don't care about this. | 0:22:33 | 0:22:37 | |
-"We cast off the crag's weight | 0:22:39 | 0:22:41 | |
-"We grow stronger, closer -and drown out the noise | 0:22:41 | 0:22:45 | |
-"Then, tomorrow, -we'll challenge it." | 0:22:45 | 0:22:48 | |
-I stick two fingers up -to this illness. | 0:22:59 | 0:23:02 | |
-I'm going to kick it out. | 0:23:03 | 0:23:05 | |
-I'm determined to kick -the blooming thing out of my life. | 0:23:05 | 0:23:11 | |
-I've done it once. | 0:23:11 | 0:23:12 | |
-I am going to do it again. | 0:23:13 | 0:23:15 | |
-So, that's it. | 0:23:18 | 0:23:19 | |
-S4C Subtitles by Testun Cyf. | 0:23:42 | 0:23:44 | |
-. | 0:23:44 | 0:23:44 |