Fire-Eaters v Korfballers Only Connect

Good evening. You'll notice we're on a bit late tonight.

Sorry about that. I've been running behind all day.

This morning, when I got up,

I accidentally used the Gregorian rather than the Julian calendar.

Sometimes I wonder why I hang them both in my kitchen.

Anyway, let's hurry on to meet the teams.

They are, on my right,

Andy Davis, a civil servant and law graduate

who was once briefly savaged by Rod Hull's emu,

Tony Moore, a foster carer,

who inadvertently became part of the entourage of King Albert II

while holidaying in Belgium,

and their captain, Jonathan Elliott,

a maths graduate who attended

the World Beard and Moustache Championship in 2007.

United by a passion for paprika,

they are the Fire-Eaters.

In your first heat, you beat the Eurovisionaries,

then you got through to this third round by beating the Clareites.

What's been the highlight of your trip to Cardiff?

Um, I think we were quite relieved to win the last game

after having a pretty terrible Wall, so that was a highlight.

Tonight, you are facing, on my left,

Taissa Csaky, a classics graduate whose dog Zephyr bears

a striking resemblance to Anubis, the Egyptian god of the afterlife,

Niall Sheekey, a librarian

and retired Irish dancer

who is also a keen lutist and a trained bell ringer,

and their captain, Michael Jelley,

a maths graduate whose great-great-uncle

was the noted illustrator Clarence Reginald Dalby.

United by a devotion to the Dutch sport of korfball,

they are the Korfballers.

So, you beat the Channel Islanders in your first heat,

then you went on to defeat the Shutterbugs.

How competitive is your team in advance of tonight's game?

-We will do literally anything to win, Victoria.

-Excellent.

Mainly what we'll require is to spot

the connection between four apparently random clues.

Although, if it turns savage, I, for one, will enjoy it.

You won the toss, Fire-Eaters, so you'll be going first.

Please choose an Egyptian hieroglyph.

We'll have the Two Reeds, please.

The Two Reeds will be the first question.

MUSICAL NOTE Ah, the music question.

That's nice, early on. A little sing-song.

What is the connection between these bits of music? Here's the first.

MUSIC: Intro to Should I Stay Or Should I Go by The Clash

Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

Yeah, that's right. OK, who's it by?

-The Clash.

-OK, we'll get the next one. Next, please.

# Some people call me the space cowboy

# Yeah

# Some call me the gangster of love... #

Next.

MUSIC: Intro to I Heard It Through The Grapevine by Marvin Gaye

I Heard It Through The Grapevine by Marvin Gaye.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

MUSIC: Intro to Spaceman by Babylon Zoo

Two seconds.

BELL

-Space?

-Is not the connection, I'm afraid.

So, Korfballers, you've got the chance of a bonus point.

We think they were all used in Levi ads.

They were all used in commercials

for Levi's jeans.

What did you recognise?

Um, there was Babylon Zoo, Spaceman.

The second one was The Joker

by Steve Miller.

I Heard It Through The Grapevine, Marvin Gaye.

Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

-By The Clash.

-By The Clash.

And which one's your era, do you think?

Which one makes you really picture the advert?

Babylon Zoo.

-Oh, really? That's late.

-'96.

For me, it's Nick Kamen taking his trousers off in the laundrette.

That's pretty definitive.

That beat the Diet Coke ad

into a cocked hat, didn't it?

Anyway, you get 1 point and while I relax

and enjoy my reveries of those adverts,

I'm going to give you the choice of a question.

-We'd like the Lion, please.

-The Lion, OK.

What is the connection between these clues? Here's the first.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

Oh...

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

It's going to be their real name, middle name...

-Shall we get another one?

-Yeah, get another one.

-Next, please.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

And next, please.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Two seconds. BELL

We think they are the people

who have the rights to the swans

in the places described after the colon.

They are swan owners.

Was that you spotting that, Niall?

-Was it only from the Queen?

-From the Queen, yeah.

People always say the Queen is allowed to eat swan, don't they?

That's how people imagine it - her dining on swan.

When you think the Queen eats swan for dinner,

-how do you picture she'd have it?

-Whole.

-Roast.

Definitely whole and roast, with some of the feathers back.

-Traditionally roasted.

-That's what you picture, isn't it?

Sort of lifting up the swan.

-Yeah.

-I'm so sorry to vegetarians.

But people never imagine it's a sort of swan risotto or a sandwich.

They imagine the whole thing.

I'm sure the Queen does not eat her swans but it's interesting

how you imagine it's the whole thing. Very lavish.

-What would you like, Fire-Eaters?

-We'll have the Twisted Flax, please.

The Twisted Flax, OK. What is the connection between these clues?

Here's the first.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

Deejaying...

I don't know.

I think we'll have to take another one.

Next, please.

-These are things that are spelt out with letters.

-Yeah.

Like DJ, MC, um...

Three seconds. BELL

These can be spelt out with letter sounds,

for example DJ and MC.

-Graff is the problem though.

-Yeah.

You nearly can but I'm not quite persuaded you could do that

with the whole word, so I'm afraid that's not it.

Korfballers, would you like to have a go for a bonus point?

Different sort of forms of hip-hop,

different roles a hip-hop artist can perform.

They are the elements of hip-hop.

-Oh, is that it?

-Are you big hip-hop fans over there?

Not really but the last two, I didn't think it was...

Not everybody says it's those four.

Doug E Fresh, for example.

What did he say should be an element of hip-hop?

-I don't know.

-Beatboxing, of course.

But KRS-One said that's already part of deejaying.

-What do you think, Tony? Already part of it?

-No idea.

-I have no comment.

-I wouldn't have thought so.

They are the four elements of hip-hop culture. Well done.

That's another bonus point.

-And another choice of question.

-The Horned Viper, please.

The Horned Viper, OK. These are going to be picture clues.

What connects them?

Here's the first.

That's an ice hockey player

but I don't know who it is.

-Let's carry on.

-Next, please.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Groucho... Oh, Marx Brothers.

-Brilliant.

-Oh, OK. Yeah?

BELL

We think that they might be Marx Brothers.

You add an O to get a Marx Brother.

You didn't need to see the last one, a harp.

So, who do you think might be

in the first two clues?

Zepp. Someone Zepp? And a Chic.

-Oh, Chic.

-Chic.

It's the band Chic and Rob Zepp,

the ice hockey player, is that first one. Well done.

You get 2 points for that.

Fire-Eaters, what would you like next?

-The Water, please.

-The Water question.

What is the connection between these clues?

Here's the first.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

So, it's the... It's one of the cranial nerves.

I think it's one of the first three cranial... Next, please.

Lesser. I think these might all be "lesser" things.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

Yeah, they're all "Lesser"..

BELL

-Um, Lesser.

-You could have come in

after two clues for that one.

These have "lesser" and "greater" forms, well done.

You didn't need to see spotted woodpecker.

The spinal nerves, the Apostle James - Greater and Lesser one -

and the Greater and Lesser Antilles.

And what about the greater and lesser spotted woodpecker?

-How can you tell them apart?

-Ask them?

You could ask them, but if they're too far away to hear you?

The lesser spotted woodpecker has more spots,

-according to the verifiers.

-Excellent.

-But also, you'd need two of them to know.

-Yes.

How can you tell if it's got more or fewer spots

unless you're looking at them next to each other? It's all baffling.

How does Bill Oddie do it? We simply don't know.

Korfballers, the Eye of Horus remains.

You'll get that question. What is the connection between these clues?

Here's the first.

The Age Of Innocence is by William Blake.

Next, please.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Is he the head of...? Does he look after an orphanage?

-Shall we go for another one?

-Next, please.

He was also a character in The Water Babies.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

-Do they die?

-Next, please.

-Chimney sweeps?

-Chimney sweeps, yeah.

BELL

Are they all chimney sweeps?

They are all chimney sweeps.

Yes, Chim-chiminey-cheroo, at the end, you recognised.

-What can you tell me about the other clues?

-Very little.

Tom is also a chimney sweep

who falls in the river

and becomes a Water Baby.

Yes, he drowns and is reborn as a Water Baby

and forgives his evil old master.

-Mr Gamfield tried to recruit Oliver Twist.

-Ah.

He's an older chimney sweep

and wants to take him on as an apprentice.

But there's dark stories about his previous ones.

And Tom Dacre in the gruellingly sad

William Blake Songs Of Innocence.

He unlocks, sweeps coffins,

and sees them sort of floating out.

-And that's the happy one. The Songs Of Experience is worse!

-Wow.

All chimney sweeps is the right answer.

That means at the end of Round One...

Onto Round Two, the sequences round.

You'll be going first again, Fire-Eaters.

What would you like this time?

We'll have the Eye of Horus, please.

OK. Picture clues for the Eye of Horus.

What would you expect to see in the fourth picture?

Time starts now.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

-Who is that?

-I don't know who it is.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

Who's that? I have no idea who that is.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Two seconds.

BELL

Um, a Bounty chocolate bar.

Not the answer, I'm afraid.

So, there's another bonus chance for the Korfballers.

-A picture of Tatum O'Neal?

-That's really good, well done.

It would be a picture of Tatum O'Neal.

What's going on in this question?

We think it's A Muppet Christmas Carol,

the finest example of that particular play, in my view,

or novel or film.

Then Carol Channing.

Niall recognised Channing Tatum

and so we figured we had to pick

any of the many famous people with Tatum as their first name.

And you've chosen Tatum O'Neal.

That's absolutely right.

For the bonus, well done.

-And which question.

-The Two Reeds, please.

The Two Reeds. What will come fourth in this sequence?

Here's the first.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Go for it.

BELL

-Er, John F Onassis?

-No, not Onassis.

-Er...

-I need an answer.

-Er, you do.

Er, John F... Quick.

-Say it.

-Onassis.

-Shriver.

-No, Onassis.

-I can't take either of those answers, I'm afraid.

So, Fire-Eaters, you've got the chance of a bonus point now.

Er, John F Agnew.

That's not it either but I can see what you're thinking.

Now, tell me how far you got and I'll tell you where you went wrong.

We thought, probably, American presidents with initials

and with the surnames of...

-The maiden names...

-Of their spouses.

-Of their wives.

That's what it is.

If successive presidents had taken their wives' names on marriage.

The trick is that Eleanor Roosevelt

was called Roosevelt before she married. They were cousins.

Harry S Truman was married to Bess Wallace.

If Eisenhower had taken the maiden name of his wife, Mamie...

-But John F Kennedy - it was Jacqueline Bouvier.

-It was! Oh!

She married Onassis later.

-Aristotle Onassis was the husband AFTER Kennedy.

-Yes.

She was Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy,

so he'd have been John F Bouvier.

I should have known that.

What would you like, Fire-Eaters, for your own question?

-The Twisted Flax, please.

-The Twisted Flax.

What would come fourth in this sequence?

Here's the first.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

It's the order of a bullfight.

It's the order of what's called in a bullfight.

Um, we could just say a part of the sword, stab it first.

Then the lance... What does a bullfighter actually use? A sword?

Yes, it's a sword in the back of the neck, isn't it?

The picador does the...

Shall I say the part of a sword?

Two seconds. BELL

We think it's going to be something in Spanish

and then the part of the sword

and hopefully, that will be enough.

I will accept that answer

but before it comes up,

I want you to have a go

at what the bit in Spanish might be.

-Pezo de sabros.

-Not it.

So, the sequence is the grizzly bullfight

and the last bit,

where the bull is dispensed with the sword, the part of death -

I don't speak Spanish either - tercio de muerte.

-OK.

-Is how it would it would not be pronounced.

It's the first bit, the parade -

that's where the matadors show off their colourful costumes.

If it were just that, it would be quite nice. That's the lovely bit.

-And then it all goes horrible.

-Yeah.

Ending with the despatching,

by sword, of the bull.

How very nasty. Well done, though, you get the points.

-Korfballers, what would you like?

-We'd like the Lion, please.

The Lion. OK, what would come fourth in this sequence? Here's the first.

Um...

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

Ah, yeah, OK.

So, what we need to do is model.

So, it is 15 + 14 + 5 = 1.

-OK.

-Yeah.

-BELL

15 + 14 + 5 = 1.

As a Shakespearean character might say,

you're in fine quizzing tonight.

It is 15 + 14 + 5 = 1. And why?

It's the letters of the alphabet of each letter of the word.

So, F is the sixth letter at the beginning of "four"

-and then T-H-R-E-E are the 20th, 8th, 18th...

-Now I get it.

Yes, it's "four", "three", "two" and then "one" as the answer.

But instead of the letters in the spelling,

we've replaced them with their position in the alphabet,

so the 15th letter would be O and so on.

-Very well calculated.

-Thank you.

-Fire-Eaters, what would you like?

-The Water, please.

Water. What would come fourth in this sequence? Here's the first.

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

Next, please.

It's the funeral of Diana.

-Why?

-Biggest TV audience of the year.

-Yeah, shall we go for that?

-Yeah.

BELL

1997: Funeral of Princess Diana.

Is the right answer.

Very well done, for 3 points.

Yes, as I heard you saying,

these are successive years

and the biggest TV audiences

in those years. Well done.

Back to you, Korfballers,

for the last question, the Horned Viper.

MUSICAL NOTE

-Oh, a music sequence. What a lovely surprise.

-Yeah.

OK, what do you think would come fourth in this musical row?

Here's the first.

# When the sun shines, we shine together

# Told you I'll be here forever... #

Next, please.

# Oh, Rose Marie

# I love you

# I'm always dreaming... #

Next, please.

# I feel it in my fingers

# I feel it in my toes... #

-I think we just go for it.

-What, the longest running number one?

-(Everything I Do) I Do It For You.

-# Love is all around me... #

BELL

Is it (Everything I Do) I Do It For You,

the last bit, no, the first bit in brackets by Bryan Adams?

Yes, it is and what is the reason for that?

-It's length of time at number one in the UK singles chart.

-That's right.

Longest continuous run at number one and that first one, Umbrella,

the Rihanna, that was number one for ten weeks.

Others have been number one for ten weeks.

It was a choice of clues there

but after that, Rose Marie, Slim Whitman,

then Wet Wet Wet, Love Is All Around, they are the next ones.

Then (Everything I Do) I Do It For You.

Unfortunately, we don't have

a recording of that to play.

It doesn't work like that.

But probably people at home will be going,

"I don't remember... How did that go?"

And I think we could remind them,

so let's have a chorus of it.

One, two, three.

-TOGTHER:

-# You know it's true

# Everything I do

# I do it for you. #

That's absolutely lovely.

That is my new ringtone. Well done.

That means, at the end of Round Two...

Time for the Connecting Wall now

and Korfballers, it's your turn to go first this time,

so would you like Lion or Water?

We'll have the Lion Wall, please.

Two and a half minutes to solve the Lion Wall, starting now.

Ashdown, Paddy. Lords?

-Forests?

-Hainault, Kielder, Ashdown...

Sherwood, Pleat, Hoddle and Nicholson

were all Tottenham managers.

-There you go.

-Brace, Gross...

Score's 20, Gross 144...

Brace is 2.

-We don't necessarily want to press them yet.

-Crown...

Um...

-Shall we do the forests?

-OK, let's do that.

-So, Ashdown, Kielder, Hainault, New.

-Oh, lovely.

-Good.

-Three strikes and you're out now.

We have Brace, Score, Gross...

-Crown?

-Wait, hang on, the others are dentistry.

-Are they?

So, it's going to be Amalgam...

-Root.

-A Nelson is 111 in cricket.

-Oh, is it? OK.

Yes, so Root canal, Amalgam filling, Crown and a Brace?

-Yeah.

-BUZZ

-Brace could also be 2.

-Shall we try the numbers then?

-Calculus.

-Oh.

That could be something in...

-But a calculus wouldn't be...

-Start again.

-Um... Could a Gross be anything else?

-Could be horrible.

-Can't be a filling.

-I don't think so.

So, Amalgam, Crown...

A half crown was a shilling, wasn't it?

What's a Calculus? We haven't got Calculus.

Calculus is not dentistry and it's not an amount.

Well, it must be one of those.

-OK.

-Could it not be something different?

-Well, hopefully not, otherwise we're ruined.

-Keep going.

Um...

Are we going to stick with maybe...? I think Nelson's such a weird thing,

I think they'll have thrown it in just to fox us.

-Is that the one we've done?

-No, we didn't have Nelson in before.

That's it. You've solved the Wall. Well done.

OK, that's 4 points for the groups. What about the connections?

Nicholson, Sherwood, Hoddle, Pleat.

They have all been managers of Tottenham Hotspur.

That is right. They are all managers of Spurs.

And the green group, starting Kielder?

-I'm reliably informed that these are forests.

-They're all forests.

-Excellent.

-And the next group -

Brace, Gross, Score, Nelson?

They are all...ways of verbally expressing numbers.

They are slang terms or casual terms for numbers.

And the last one - Crown, Amalgam, Calculus, Root.

We think they're all terms in dentistry.

Even Calculus, which I said definitely wasn't.

Calculus is another word for tartar.

Plaque residue on the teeth is calculus.

All terms in dentistry.

So, that's the four connections as well, so a maximum of 10.

Let's bring in their opponents now, give them a new Connecting Wall

and see what they can do with it.

It'll be a helping of Water for you, Fire-Eaters.

You've got the Water Wall and two and a half minutes, starting now.

OK, you've got Rotary clubs. Selenium is Se.

-Happy Valley...

-Are there any race courses here?

Downton Abbey. Um...

TV series. Downton Abbey, as you say,

Happy Valley is one, and Threads.

BUZZ

-Heartbeat.

-BUZZ

-Oscillating.

-Linear and Rotary are motors, aren't they?

-Yes.

-We need to think about this. So, Wall of Jericho.

-Have we had a word one yet?

-No.

-No, OK.

-"In the pudding". What does this mean?

-I don't know.

-Mon...

-Moon, moon and moon.

-Yes, excellent. This could be...

This is probably moon

cos Selenium is the Greek god of the moon, I think.

Hercules', Jericho, Golf, In the pudding...

I have no idea what this means.

There's an apostrophe here, so this is Hercules'.

Hercules' tasks?

-Hercules had a club, didn't he?

-Yeah.

-Golf club.

-Club is possible.

-In the pudding club.

-You can be in the pudding club.

-Yeah.

-BUZZ

-OK, it's not right.

Which one are we not sure about?

Month club? Monday club?

Lunatic club? Hercules' moon?

INDISTINCT DISCUSSION

We've got three guesses.

BUZZ You've got one now.

Oh, yes...

-Selenium. What's the code for selenium?

-Se.

-Se.

Do we know what Jericho is?

Could it possibly be named after the moon or something like that?

Um, Month club, Monday club.

Shall I go for the clubs again?

-Well, those three are to do with the moon.

-I think that's got to be...

-30 seconds.

-Which ones did you choose last time?

-I chose Selenium.

Is there a Hercules' moon?

I don't think... I don't think...

I don't think these are together.

I think it's got to be...

There's one other which could possibly be moon.

Jericho?

That's it. That's your three strikes.

The Wall's frozen, but you found two groups.

And what about the connections?

Heartbeat, Threads, Downton Abbey, Happy Valley.

-They're all television programmes.

-I need something specific.

Um, were they all on the same channel? Are they all on ITV?

No, you're not seeing it.

I think Downton Abbey is just too famous a TV series

to give it to you just for that.

-They are all set in Yorkshire.

-Ah.

And the green group - Oscillating, Reciprocating, Linear, Rotary?

-Engines, motors.

-They are types of mechanical motion.

You can still get points

for the connections in the groups you didn't find,

so, let's resolve the Wall.

There you go. Hercules, Monday, Golf, In the pudding.

-These are clubs.

-OK.

-Clubs.

Those are the clubs. And the last one.

Selenium, Lunatic, Jericho, Month?

-These are the moon, named after the moon.

-They are named after the moon.

Jericho from the Hebrew, Selenium from the Greek.

-I'm sure I tried that one but must have not done it.

-No.

But you found two groups

and gave me three connections, so that is a total of five points.

Let's have a look at the scores.

Missing vowels time now. Fingers on buzzers, teams.

I can tell you that the first group are all connected to Jamaica.

-Fire-Eaters.

-Sorry, it's gone.

Too long, I'm afraid.

Korfballers, do you know?

-Blue Mountains.

-Correct.

-Korfballers.

-Red Stripe.

Don't mind if I do.

Different sort of connection here.

She went of her own accord.

Next clue.

Fire-Eaters.

-Er, no, sorry.

-Korfballers.

-Andrew Holness.

-Correct.

Next category.

-Korfballers.

-Jesus Christ Super Star Wars.

-Well done.

-Fire-Eaters.

-South Pacific Rim.

That's right.

-Fire-Eaters.

-Oh, What A Lovely War Of The Worlds.

-Correct.

-Korfballers.

-The King And I, Robot.

That one's my favourite.

Next category.

-Fire-Eaters.

-Easter Sunday.

-Correct.

-Fire-eaters.

-Pesach.

-Correct.

Fire-Eaters. MUSIC SIGNALS END OF ROUND

But there's no time to give me the answer to that one.

I'm sure you would have said Chinese New Year.

But the bell has gone for the end of the quiz

and I can tell you that the winners

and through to the next round, with 27 points,

it's the Korfballers.

And in second place, with 15, it's the Fire-Eaters.

But you're not going home, Fire-Eaters,

because in our new structure, people don't go home immediately

if they lose a game in Round Three.

They get another go. I don't understand it either.

Earlier in the series, they were going too quickly.

Now we can't get rid of them. Everyone's coming back again.

We'll see you again, and you as well.

Before we go, a small clarification

to one of the questions in last week's show.

When we said the philosopher Kant, we meant Immanuel Kant,

not Brian Cant, the leading thinker in the 1980s' Play Away movement.

Sorry for any confusion there. Goodbye.