Semi-Final 1 Only Connect

Hello and welcome to the Only Connect semifinals.

Yes, we are in the home straight towards the deciding of

this year's championship, which means so much to everyone involved.

"Remember last year's winners?"

is the very difficult tie-break question I'll be asking

in the event of a draw.

We're all very excited here, in the studio.

Let's meet the first contenders for this year's final.

On my right...

Jeremy Partington,

a civil servant who visited the set of A View To A Kill

while the crater which blew up Grace Jones was still smouldering.

Chris James, a software developer

who used to live next door

to the original lead singer of Iron Maiden.

And their captain, Jonathan Carter,

a civil servant who's been down a salt mine in Poland,

a silver mine in the Czech Republic and a coal mine in County Durham.

United by a fondness

for well-tended shrubbery,

they are the Surrealists.

Jonathan, your team has not lost a single game on the way here.

How's your team faring as the pressure mounts?

Well, it's been so surreal that I think we've broken through

and come out the other side, where it's all too worryingly real.

Tonight, you are facing, on my left...

Phyl Styles, a secondary school teacher who's had

a total of 104 children living in her house at various times.

Tom Cappleman, a software engineer

who spent several consecutive nights

sleeping in a graveyard.

And their captain, Graeme Cole,

a computer sciences graduate who designed a logo for

a teletext page that was used for the next ten years.

United by a love of language,

they are the Verbivores.

Now, this is a rematch.

You've met tonight's opposition once before,

and you suffered a defeat on that occasion.

How are the team's spirits tonight?

Well, we thought, to maximise our chances today,

we ought to spend the previous night swotting up with encyclopaedias

and quiz books and so on.

Then we decided it would be a lot more fun to go bowling,

so we did that instead.

Excellent. That'll get you right in the mood.

Let's bowl a few questions at these teams.

You won the toss, Surrealists,

but you decided to put your opponents in first.

So, Verbivores,

-please choose a hieroglyph.

-Lion, please.

OK. The first question of this year's semifinals

will be the Lion question.

Your first clue is coming in now.

Next.

Precision. Detective?

Pre... So it's C, I, S.

-But that doesn't... Yeah.

-Next.

Influen... Oh, tec!

Yes, detective can be used for tec.

So you can use it for what it would be related to.

A common abbreviation of these words have been removed from the words.

Very well spotted.

You didn't need the last clue.

Eabeth, from which Liz has been removed. Elizabeth.

What words are we looking at?

Detective, influenza and...

The first one? I'm not sure.

It's prescription.

You can say script for prescription.

That's come out of prescription.

Tec out of detective.

Flu out of influenza.

And Liz out of Elizabeth.

Very well spotted. Well done.

Abbreviations have been taken out.

Surrealists, what would you like?

-Twisted Flax, please.

-Twisted Flax.

OK, what is the connection between these clues?

Here's the first.

Anything? Next, please.

That was the first film...

And they're the producers.

What were the first films...?

-Have to take another.

-Next, please.

Oh, it's the first...

The first lesbian kiss.

It's the first kiss

of a particular kind.

Yeah. First kisses.

First kisses.

Well, I will take it.

There's an interesting fact about the last clue

that you haven't seen yet - that's about to come up now - but, yes.

May Irwin and John Rice, do you know what that is?

-That's a very early film.

-The first film kiss?

That's one of the first kisses

we know about on film.

Thomas Edison filmed a scene from a musical that had a kiss in it,

and that was terribly controversial.

The next one, Jack Powell and David Armstrong, what's that?

That must be the first male kiss on film, somewhere.

Of course, we don't know

everything that's on film,

but the first or one of the first kisses between two men.

It's a Clara Bow movie,

and the two men are competing

for her affection, and they kiss

each other - in a very manly way.

But still, a little controversial at the time.

Beth Jordache and Margaret Clemence from Brookside,

a lesbian kiss that was very much talked about

and actually used, I think,

at the beginning of the Olympics.

-Yes.

-Because people were very proud of that one.

Let's have a look at the last clue.

Star Trek, yeah.

-Interracial.

-First interracial kiss, wasn't it, I think?

Except that it wasn't, you see.

There had been an interracial kiss

on a TV play for Granada,

You In Your Small Corner, that

was quietly the first interracial

kiss on TV, but thought to be the first one is this from Star Trek.

It is thought to be the first kiss.

Very well done.

Verbivores, what would you like?

-Eye of Horus, please.

-Eye of Horus.

You're going to see some picture clues. What connects them?

Here's the first.

-Don't recognise them.

-No.

-Next.

-Don't know who they are.

-I don't know.

-Next.

Well, we're clattering through these, aren't we?

Do you know who that is?

HE WHISPERS

-No, I don't. Not good at these people.

-Next.

David Bowie...

Is that Liam Gallagher?

Are they...? I don't know, have they done duets?

If we haven't got anything else, let's do it.

-Two seconds.

-Same names?

Uh... Is the surname of one the first name of another?

The surname of one

is not the first name of another,

I'm afraid.

Surrealists, do you want

to have a go for a bonus point?

They both have the same real name.

The whole name is the same.

Their birth names are the same.

Who are we looking at?

Stewart Grainger and James Stewart.

-Michael Douglas and Michael Keaton.

-Mm-hm.

Katy Perry and... Elizabeth Hudson?

-Kate Hudson.

-Kate Hudson. Yeah.

David Bowie and David Jones.

Davy Jones.

David Bowie and Davy Jones.

Yes, Davy Jones very much

the Liam Gallagher of the 1960s.

That's right, the person on the left

was born with the same name

as the person on the right,

but they changed it to avoid fusion.

So James Stewart became Stewart Grainger.

Michael Douglas became Michael Keaton. And so on.

Surrealists, what would you like?

The Horned Viper, please.

The Horned Viper. What is the connection between these clues?

Here's the first.

Anything?

Next, please.

So that will be versions, or something.

Next, please.

Renaldo. Renee and Renaldo?

-What's their song?

-No, it's not.

-That's completely different.

-Next. Next, please.

Those are singers of the...

HE WHISPERS

It's the Four Tops, I think.

-Sure?

-Three seconds.

They're all singers for the Four Tops.

These are the Four Tops,

that is absolutely right.

The Motown vocal quartet, the Four Tops,

and these are the four.

Very well done.

Verbivores, what would you like?

Two Reeds, please. Two Reeds.

-MUSICAL TONE

-Water, please.

SHE LAUGHS

Too late, I'm afraid.

It is the lovely music question.

You'll be hearing your clues. What connects them?

Here's the first.

ORCHESTRAL MUSIC PLAYS

Oh, my God, what is this?

I think that's...a ballet.

-There's one that goes... It's not that, is it?

-No.

Next.

LIVELY ORCHESTRAL MUSIC PLAYS

No. Next.

# Lights go out and I can't be saved... #

Coldplay.

-# Tides that I tried... #

-X And Y? X And Y?

-# Have brought me down... #

-Next.

LIVELY GUITAR MUSIC PLAYS

Two seconds.

Letters of the alphabet.

Not the answer, I'm afraid.

So, surrealists, would you like

to have a go for a bonus point?

-Clocks?

-Clocks is the answer.

What did we hear?

Was the first one Haydn's Clock Symphony?

I mean, it's officially

Haydn's Symphony Number 101,

but it is known as the Clock Symphony

because of the ticking

throughout one of the movements.

What else?

The third one was Coldplay.

Coldplay, Clocks.

The last one was Rock Around The Clock, wasn't it?

Rock Around The Clock, Bill Haley & the Comets.

And the second one was The Syncopated Clock.

Clocks is the answer

for a bonus point.

And your question now, Water.

What is the connection between these clues?

Here's the first.

Anything? Next, please.

-Why?

-THEY WHISPER

Next, please.

-What's that?

-Oh, the next part of that is...

-No, but they must all have...

-Hampton Court, is it? No.

It's between... Wait, Hammersmith.

Yeah, but what's the connection? Next, please.

-Which one is it, though?

-It's not a sequence.

No, but the...

Two seconds.

-The Kew Bridge.

-Q.

-Q.

Q.

The answer is Q.

You don't have to write it down, so it doesn't matter how you spell it.

How would you spell it in these various clues?

Um... That must be C-U-E in the first one.

That first one, it is a term

from psychology and biology.

A cue that prompts an organism

to make inferences.

-Q-U-E-U-E.

-That's right.

That's the second complicated one.

-Kew.

-That's Kew Bridge.

-And then just Q.

The letter Q is the least common in the OED.

All sound-alikes of Q. Well done.

That means, at the end of Round One,

the Verbivores have two points,

the Surrealists have six.

On to round Q, the sequences round, or two as some people call it.

You will be going first again, Verbivores.

Which hieroglyph would you like?

-The Horned Viper, please.

-The Horned Viper, OK.

You'll be seeing the first in a sequence of pictures.

What would you expect to see in the fourth picture? The time starts now.

-4, dart.

-OK.

Next.

4, 1...

Two o'clock. One o'clock.

No, it's not that. Next.

-18.

-Is it adding a double?

D-A-R-T!

A dart in the 20.

Is the right answer. Very well done.

So, you spotted what is going on in this fiendish sequence.

-Talk me through it.

-It's the...

The fourth letter of the alphabet is D,

the first is A, the 18th is R and the 20th is T,

and it spells out dart.

That's right.

This is very much up your street.

It is a clever letter question,

but deeply disguised on a dartboard,

so very well spotted there.

T is the right answer, to spell out the word dart.

Back to you, Surrealists,

for a sequence choice.

-Eye of Horus, please.

-OK.

What would come fourth in this sequence? Here's the first.

-1381.

-Yes.

-Next, please.

-Next one.

1581?

No, was it that?

No, that was before the Spanish Armada,

so that would be...

So we think it could be something that happened...?

It could still be.

-You think it could be 1981?

-Yeah.

-It could be 1981.

-What do you want?

-Next?

-OK.

-Next?

-1781, so it will be...

-Next, please.

So what happened in 1981?

Assassination attempt of Reagan.

Was that...?

-Um... Was that definitely in 1981?

-Yeah.

Something that happened in 1981.

Something that happened in 1981.

Well, that's the right answer, but I would like an example.

Assassination attempt of Ronald Reagan, or the Pope.

Both those assassination

attempts were in 1981.

Charles and Diana's wedding would be

the cheerier example that we

were thinking of, but that's right.

And what were the years of these other things?

So, 1381,

1581,

1781 and 1981.

-So going up in 200s.

-That's right.

The Battle of Yorktown

was the last major battle

in the American War of Independence.

We are jumping 200 years each time.

Something from 1981,

for example a wedding or an assassination attempt,

depending on your...

outlook on life.

Verbivores, back to you for

-a choice.

-Twisted Flax, please.

The Twisted Flax. OK. What would come fourth in this sequence?

Here's the first.

A wanderer. A wanderer is another word for a star, isn't it?

-Planet.

-Sorry, no, you're right. Yes, sorry, planet.

Next.

Horch.

-It's going to be four...

-Is it going to be the Audi symbol?

-Yeah.

Cos that means a planet, that... I don't know what Horch is,

-but should we say four rings and Audi?

-Yeah.

Four rings, Audi.

Four rings, Audi

is the right answer.

-And why?

-They're just successive number of rings.

The first one, I think it is the symbol for a planet,

which is otherwise called a wanderer.

What it is, the four rings symbolise

four different car companies

that merged in 1932.

-Oh.

-Wanderer - or "Vanderer" -

Horch, DKW,

however you pronounce them,

these are four German car companies

that merged

and they ended up with Audi.

We're going in reverse alphabetical order.

It's not that Audi was particularly the fourth.

Audi is also the one

you're most likely to guess,

if you recognise the logo - well done.

Back to you, Surrealists, for a choice.

-Lion, please.

-Lion.

What is the fourth in this sequence?

Here's the first.

Next, please.

There is commas... Full stops...

Comma, dot-dot-dot.

It's missing out B, C, F, G...

And H, I, K.

M...

-Next.

-Next, please.

M, O, P...

S, T. So it would be...

The last one missing is the first one and the next one.

So...you'll have to do something.

I'm stumped. Can't see it.

Two seconds.

BELL

Um...T...

X...

So, T,...X,...Z.

Is the right answer.

Do you have any idea why?

Cos we're missing out

some letters along the way!

We do sometimes have that.

Amazing thing about the brain.

Sometimes, people give an answer, and it's right,

and they don't know why - sometimes,

your unconscious mind's noticed something,

sometimes it's coincidence.

I'll tell you the letters

that are missed out - have a think

whether they have anything in common.

B, C, F, H, I,

K, N, O, P, S, U, V, W, Y.

They are elements.

-Oh!

-We have removed all the letters

that symbolise chemical elements

and left only the letters

that are not elements.

So taking out V, vanadium,

W, tungsten, Y, yttrium,

we get T,...X,...Z.

Maybe a hypnotist could regress you

to the moment in your life

when you knew that, when the inner voice

told you T, X and Z were the answers.

Spooky.

Back to the people who sleep in graveyards.

LAUGHTER Verbivores, what would you like?

-Water, please.

-Water, OK.

What will come fourth in this sequence?

Here's the first.

HORN, in capitals, for some reason.

Next.

It's the examples in a game of Scrabble.

HORN, FARM...

In the box, these are

the example words, aren't they?

We are going to have to see them.

Next.

PASTE...

I don't know...

FARM...

Where does PASTE go in, there?

Oh...

I know PIE is used, but...

Three seconds...

BELL

PIE, written vertically.

Not the answer, I'm afraid.

Surrealists, do you know?

-NOTE.

-No.

If you don't know, you can't work it out.

You were absolutely right.

This is from the sample game from

the official rules of Scrabble.

They show you how to play Scrabble

by putting some words out

and the next word is MOB.

It's played from the M of FARM,

and it makes NOT and BEE,

using the N from HORN and the E from PASTE.

MOB is the next word.

Well done for recognising the sequence,

if not remembering the word.

So, no bonus for you, Surrealists,

but you may have a question,

the Two Reeds.

CHIMING

It's a music sequence, I'm delighted to say.

Which piece of music would you expect to come fourth?

Here's the first.

MUSIC: What Shall We Do With The Drunken Sailor?

It's the...

So, it's the last night of the Proms.

So it finishes with Land Of Hope And Glory.

Yeah...or God Save The Queen.

It finishes with Land Of Hope And Glory, surely.

Not sure...

Next, please.

MUSIC: Greensleeves

That's Greensleeves.

Yeah, is that not what they do?

Then it's Rule Britannia...

Or is it sea songs?

No, sea songs, Greensleeves...

Must be Land Of Hope And Glory.

BELL

Land of Hope and Glory.

Not the answer, I'm afraid.

So, I'm going to play a blast of the third piece

to the Verbivores for a possible bonus point.

MUSIC: Men of Harlech

Are they sea shanties.

What would be the fourth...?

That's Welsh, isn't it?

What else have we had?

I need an answer.

Uh...the national anthem.

Not it, I'm afraid.

-You're thinking of the Proms, aren't you?

-Yeah.

-That's not what it is.

-Not what it is.

It's the UK Theme.

-Oh...

-Radio 4 always used to begin with the UK Theme.

Horrifically, they dropped it a while ago for, sort of, news,

cos we don't get enough news(!)

But it used to be that, and the fast section

is made up of What Shall We Do With The Drunken Sailor,

Greensleeves, Men of Harlech,

and then Scotland the Brave.

Scotland the Brave, people at home

will be aching to hear it,

but we don't have it to play.

I think, though,

-we might whistle it.

-Yes!

What do you think?

Can we whistle Scotland the Brave?

-Yes.

-That's right,

have a sip of water, get yourself

ready for the whistling.

-Warm up!

-Warm up.

OK, one, two, three...

THEY HUM AND WHISTLE SCOTLAND THE BRAVE

We're all in a different key.

I mean, I could let this go

till the end of the show.

Absolutely lovely.

Scotland the Brave, there.

Scottish viewers will be thrilled.

LAUGHTER

The rousing sound

of that beautiful whistling.

No points, though, unfortunately, but I can tell you that at the end of round two,

the Verbivores have 7,

the Surrealists have 10.

On to the Connecting Wall, now,

and the Surrealists will be going first this time.

So, please choose - Lion or Water?

-Lion, please.

-Lion.

Two-and-a-half minutes to solve the Lion Wall, starting now.

-Um...

-Fish.

-Right...

Fugu, dace, bass...hoki.

Vaux, or...

No. Dace...

Must be...

You can pluck courage, you can pluck flowers...

You can...

Courage is a bitter.

So is that, so is that.

-Castle?

-Vaux, as well.

It's a drink. It is a beer.

-Castle?

-Try that, yeah.

Volva?

They may be...

They may all be drinks.

There is a Dutch...oven, Dutch auction...

-Dutch courage.

-Dutch cap?

No.

Volva...umbo...

There must be...

-What's the stalk?

-Beanstalk...

What did you say? Dutch cap, Dutch courage, Dutch auction...

Fly leaf...

Jumbo...umbo...

What is stalk?

Parts of flowers? Stalk, umbo, leaf, cap.

What's the wordplay?

Come on, time...

Beanstalk...stalk...

30 seconds.

I don't know.

-What about other flower...?

-Volva.

Go for the beers, then.

No...

Bass...

-No...

-10 seconds.

That's it, the time is up,

the Wall has frozen.

But you've found a group in this difficult semifinal Wall.

What can you tell me about this blue group, starting fugu?

They are all fish, types of fish.

They are all fish. You can still get points

for the connections in the groups you didn't find,

so let's resolve the wall.

There we go.

Stalk, umbo, cap, volva.

Parts of a flower?

No, it's not a flower,

but a mushroom.

I think a flower doesn't have an umbo,

but all bits of a mushroom.

-Dutch...

-And the pink group -

oven, courage, auction, leaf.

They can all follow the word Dutch.

You can put "Dutch" before all of them.

And the last turquoise group,

starting "Vau", or "Vox", or "Vaux...

-Breweries.

-Beers or breweries.

They are beers, and the breweries that make them.

That's absolutely right.

So, you found one group and told me three connections,

that is a total of four.

Let's bring in the Verbivores, now,

give them the other Connecting Wall and see what they can do with it.

Two-and-a-half minutes to solve the Water Wall, starting now.

-Sargasso Sea?

-Sargasso Sea.

Any other seas? Irish Sea, Dog Sea? Or have I made that up?

-Bothnian Sea.

-Bothnian Sea.

-Labrador?

No... Is there a Labrador Sea?

Seaweed, maybe? Irish moss.

It has...

Oh, Sargasso is a seaweed as well, yes.

Wrack, Irish moss...

Any other weeds? Tangleweed?

-Oh!

-Well done.

-Right, so... Labrador, Dog...

The Isle of Dogs, perhaps?

Are these Kings? Larry King, Carole King, Stephen King...

Oh, I thought you were meaning there was a King Larry!

-LAUGHING:

-Larry King, Carole King...

-Rodney King? Any other Kings?

There might be an Earl King, mightn't there?

The others aren't names, are they?

Let's do it.

Oh, we've got one...

Three lives, now.

Right. Pink, Stephen...

Irish terrier?

Um...

Dog Star? Um...

What's Wadden?

I don't know what Wadden is.

Is it a surname, or...?

Imperial... Imperial March?

We could still have seas. Bothnian Sea, Irish Sea...

Wadden Sea might be...

Bothnian, Irish, Wadden, Labrador?

-Might be, yes.

-It sounds plausible.

What do we think the others might be?

Mint? Is dog mint a thing?

Dog mint, pink mint, Stephen Mint?

-Well, can we try Labrador?

-Yeah.

-Oh!

-That's it, you've solved the Wall, very well done.

So, that's four points for the groups,

and I'm going to ask you about the connections,

and I will be wanting specific answers in this semifinal.

Tell me about the first group, starting Irish moss.

Types of seaweed?

They are types of seaweed or marine algae, well done.

And the green group - Earl, Larry, Rodney, Carol.

King.

They are all kings.

What about the next pink group?

They are seas.

-I need more.

-They are seas...

Around the British Isles?

Are they European?

They are around Europe.

They are not, the Labrador Sea

is between Canada and Greenland.

They are seas of the North Atlantic.

-Oh, right.

-That's what I needed to hear.

And the turquoise group, starting dog.

-Mint?

-Let's say Mint.

The word is not mint, but pound.

Dog pound, Imperial pound,

pink pound and Stephen Pound,

who is an MP.

You found all four groups, you told me two connections,

that is a total of six.

Let's have a look at the overall scores.

The Verbivores have 13 points,

the Surrealists have 14.

So, it could be anyone's game

as we go into the Missing Vowels round

that will decide the first place in the final.

Fingers on buzzers, teams.

I can tell you that the first group are all...

BELL

Verbivores?

Mastering The Art Of French Cooking.

BELL

-Surrealists?

-The Naked Chef.

Don't know this one?

It's One Is Fun. Next clue.

BELL Surrealists?

How To Be A Domestic Goddess.

Next category...

BELL Verbivores?

High School Musicalifornia.

Well done.

BELL Surrealists?

There's Something About Maryland.

BELL Surrealists?

The Night Before Christmassachusetts.

I'm afraid it's not. Verbivores, do you know?

The Night Before Christmas...

That's not it, either.

It's The Nightmare Before Christmassachusetts.

Next clue.

BELL Surrealists?

Gone With The Wind...

Too long, I'm afraid. Verbivores?

Gone With The Windiana.

Gone With The Windiana.

Next category...

BELL Verbivores?

Sedimentary.

END-OF-ROUND JINGLE

Sedimentary is the right answer.

And after an exciting and hotly contested ground four,

I can reveal that the winners,

and through to the final with 17 points,

are the Verbivores.

Very well done to you, and a close second,

with 15 points, it's the Surrealists.

Very unlucky, Surrealists.

You've been a brilliant team and a pleasure to have here.

-OK.

-I'm sorry to say goodbye.

Well done to you, Verbivores.

You are through to the final.

So unexpected!

Good luck, there.

And before we go, I'm excited to reveal that Only Connect

has just come second in a poll to name the greatest quiz shows

of all time, second only to the classic Bullseye.

We are honoured to be in such exalted company and,

as a tribute to that great show, next week,

the teams will be competing for a small Bronze Bully.

That's right, I'm getting a fake tan.

Goodbye.