Verbivores v Channel Islanders Only Connect

Hello and welcome to Only Connect,

which you should think of as an Old Firm game without the hatred,

sectarianism and football.

It basically is an Old Firm game,

only each team has only three players, they're avid quizzers,

and instead of Ibrox, they play in a Cardiff TV studio.

Other than that, the same.

Kicking off tonight, we have...

On my right, Phyl Styles, a competent cricket scorer

who also acts as secretary for the Sevenoaks Society

for the Conservation and Improvement of the Town.

Tom Cappleman, a software engineer who spent New Year

at a Hungarian maths camp.

And their captain, Graeme Cole,

a computer sciences graduate who played the part of weatherman

Ian McCaskill in his school's nativity play.

United by an affection for the alphabet, they are the Verbivores.

Now, you lost your opening game against the Smiths, but you're back

as part of our highest scoring second-place finisher structure.

What's your team been up to since we saw you last?

In our first game we noticed we had inadvertently slipped in a tribute,

a homage to the Star Trek film series in that we were

only really any good at the even-numbered rounds.

So continuing the sci-fi theme,

Tom and I went to the Doctor Who Experience

just down the road from here.

So we're hoping for lots of sequences of missing vowels

questions about Doctor Who. That would be lovely.

We usually have at least nine Doctor Who questions

in every episode, so you'll probably be all right.

This time around you are facing, on my left...

Sean McManus,

a geography graduate who visited a national park in Mozambique

at the same time as East German leader Erich Honecker.

Caroline McManus, an aspiring

politician and former teacher

who is on a mission to visit the grave of every English monarch.

And their captain, Tabitha Osborne,

a junior doctor whose significant collection of penguin memorabilia

was once exhibited at Nottingham Castle.

United by their Guernsey routes,

they are the Channel Islanders.

Tabitha, you lost your first game to the Korfballers,

but you're also back as a sort of lucky loser.

What advice have you given your team-mates?

I've suggested they try and get more right,

I think that will help us.

We've been practising the Wall, so

we'll give it our best shot.

Yes, this is Round sort of 1b,

where the teams get a second chance to win through to Round 2,

and they do that initially by playing Round 1.

With me so far? You won the toss, Channel Islanders,

so you'll be first to choose an Egyptian hieroglyph.

Let's go for Eye of Horus, please.

OK. The first of four clues is going to come up.

They're picture clues,

something connects them, what is it?

Your time starts now.

Next, please.

Daniel Radcliffe.

I don't know any connection.

Next, please.

Alligator, crocodile?

I can't think of a connection

between Khrushchev and Daniel Radcliffe.

We're going to have to see the next, please.

A candle.

No, I can't see it.

Songs!

Three seconds.

BUZZER

-WHISPERING:

-Elton John songs?

Yes, Elton John songs.

Is the right answer.

I think it was you that spotted that, Caroline.

What are we looking at?

Well, actually wrongly, I think.

I was thinking about...

Well, obviously, the candle in the wind at the end.

-And Nikita.

-But Nikita it is, isn't it?

It's Nikita Khrushchev,

the Russian leader.

Lovely Daniel Radcliffe,

-and a crocodile and a rock.

-Oh!

All denoting songs by Elton John.

So well done, you get a point.

And Verbivores, your chance to choose.

Horned Viper, please.

The Horned Viper.

What is the connection between these clues?

Here's the first.

A film, maybe?

I don't think so.

Oh, yeah.

Right, so is it anagrams of prime ministers?

And the year they took office.

Is it worth going for it?

I think so.

BUZZER

Is it anagrams of prime ministers

and the years they took office?

There's horrified sighing

to my left.

It IS anagrams of prime ministers

and the year they took office.

For the first time this series

I can give you five points for

coming in after one clue, very well done.

What are we looking at?

Harold Macmillan is the second one.

David Cameron and Tony Blair.

Yes, I always rather liked that anagram,

was it "I am Tory plan B"?

For Tony Blair. You need "MP".

So it wouldn't work with the others.

You need "Tony Blair, MP."

I think that was a good one.

Anyway, very well done.

Excellent stuff, five points.

Back to you, Channel Islanders,

for a question.

-Water, please.

-Water.

What is the connection between these clues?

Here's the first.

Next, please.

Next, please.

Punishments?

Next, please.

Ways in which you can be...?

Three seconds.

BUZZER

Ways in which you can be found

not guilty of an offence?

I'm afraid that's not an

answer I can accept.

So there's a possible bonus chance

for the Verbivores.

I, shall we go with...

Are they things that are normally

written in a different language

in legal...in legal texts?

No, that's not right.

And you're actually looking at

a selection of languages, of course. Cos we've got some Latin in there.

No, where you are unlucky is

they are all verdicts

but not of being not guilty.

Non compos mentis,

that is a not guilty verdict.

That's what we'd now say is

"not guilty by reason of insanity."

But the others, all guilty verdicts.

So no bonus point, Verbivores.

But you may choose a question.

-Twisted Flax, please.

-Twisted Flax.

OK. What is the connection between these clues?

Here's the first.

-Minotaur? It could be a lot of things, though.

-Yeah.

Next, please.

Labyrinths?

Is the second...? Have you heard the second?

-I don't know the second.

-Next, please.

I don't know that.

Frobscottle sounds like Roald Dahl.

Next, please.

Fictional types of beer.

Cos that's the Simpsons.

It could be.

Are these fictional brands of beer?

I'm afraid that is

not the right answer.

So a bonus chance for you now,

Channel Islanders.

Going to go with fictional drinks.

They're fictional drinks,

unfortunately you went too specific.

Moloko Plus is a cocktail, but not beer.

Duff is a beer, that's from what?

-The Simpsons.

-That's from the Simpsons.

Frobscottle, anyone know what that's from?

-BFG.

-That's from The BFG.

It's a sort of fizzy drink.

And Minotaur, very much not beer,

it's an energy drink in the film

The Role Models,

which is about people who sell

energy drink.

In my experience, beer,

not an energy drink.

So a bonus point to you,

Channel Islanders,

and your chance for a question.

-Two Reeds.

-Two Reeds, OK.

It's the music question.

You asked nervously, hoping

it wouldn't be, no doubt.

-I did.

-Unlucky, it is.

What connects these clues?

Here's the first.

# See my love through loneliness

# See my love for sorrow. #

Next, please.

# Drink beer with the guys

# And chase after girls. #

OK.

Next, please.

# Yes, I knew my morale would crack

# From the wonderful way you looked

# Boy if I were a duck I'd quack. #

BUZZER

They're all singing about

wishing to be something else.

Tell me a bit more.

So the second one was If I Were a Boy.

First one was Carpenter...

If I Was a Carpenter and you were a lady was first.

And the last lady sang something about being a duck.

But I don't know the song.

I'm going to accept that answer.

Because I'm in a very good mood,

mainly because we had that song

at my wedding.

-If I Were a Bell, from Guys & Dolls.

-Aw.

It IS songs about wishing

you were something else.

We've expressed the answer as

the subjunctive.

Because they're all If I Were.

But that is absolutely the point of it,

is they are all wistfully singing,

"If I were something else".

And you didn't need

If I Were a Rich Man,

the hopeful song from

Fiddler on the Roof.

They're songs imagining an alternative world where the singer

is something else.

Verbivores, what would you like?

Let's go with Lion.

Lion. I think that's a very good choice under the circumstances.

What is the connection between these clues?

Here's the first.

Next, please.

Power is...

Is it someone's law? It's not Ohm's law, it's, um...

Next, please.

No, I don't know this.

It's not Anne Hathaway, is it?

No.

Next.

I don't know, I've not got this at all.

Three seconds.

BUZZER

-Go Boyle.

-We'll say Boyle.

And why would that be?

So we think it's Boyle's Law,

and is it Danny Boyle?

For the last one?

All eminent Boyles.

That is the right answer.

And you don't know anything

about the other two clues?

Oh, it's Susan Boyle.

Sue Boyle, of course.

Fantine's Solo, that's what Susan Boyle sang, famously, in 2009,

in a sort of moment that stopped

the nation on a reality TV show.

And do you know who the controller

of Radio 4 was on those dates?

-No.

-It was James Boyle,

he controversially changed

the broadcast time of The Archers.

I'm sorry to use that language

on this show. But he did that,

people were very shocked.

All eminent Boyles, very well done.

That means at the end of Round 1,

the Channel Islanders have four points,

the Verbivores have six.

Onto the sequences round now, and Channel Islanders,

you'll be first again.

Which hieroglyph would you like?

Water, please.

OK, the water question,

you're going to see the first in a sequence.

I'd like to know what would come fourth.

Your time starts now.

Valentine's Day massacre?

Next, please.

It is, it is.

So what's the fourth?

Any idea?

Next, please.

The Becher's, or the Chair, or the Water Jump?

-I don't know which it is.

-I don't know which it is.

We're just going to have to give one of them.

OK, Becher's.

We're going to go for Becher's Brook.

Is the right answer.

Or Becher's, as it's colloquially known.

What are we looking at?

We're looking at jumps on the Grand National.

And there's something else about it.

-It is...

-Named after?

No, what it is, gamblers will know,

and that's why I know, it's,

unlike the horses, going backwards.

So you'd actually, I mean they go

around twice in the Grand National

but you'd go over Becher's and then

Foinavon and then the Canal Turn,

and then Valentine's Brook.

over so we're going backwards to the famous one,

Becher's in the last place, there.

Verbivores, what would you like?

Two Reeds, please. Two Reeds.

What would come fourth in this sequence?

Here's the first.

Next, please.

King... King Lear?

It is a sequence, but I don't...

OK, Hamlet's a prince, and then King,

-but I don't know what comes after King!

-I don't know.

Next.

Ghosts of?

-No.

-No.

-Hamlet wasn't a ghost, was he?

Name a character in Hamlet.

Three seconds.

BUZZER

We'll say that... The Sentry?

Not an acceptable answer,

I'm afraid.

So a bonus chance for you,

Channel Islanders.

We're going to guess Son.

That's very much not the case.

The answer is Royal Dane.

Now, you're trying to think of

different characters in Hamlet, aren't you?

Yes, the order in which they appear.

But it's not,

it's all the same character.

-This is all Hamlet's father.

-Oh!

It's young Prince Hamlet addressing the ghost.

He doesn't really want to believe

that it is a ghost so he says to it,

"I'll call thee Hamlet, King,

Father, Royal Dane."

All terms of address for the

fearsome ghost that confronts Hamlet

at the beginning of that play.

Channel Islanders, your turn

to choose a question.

-Twisted Flax.

-The Twisted Flax.

These are going to be picture clues,

what sort of thing would you expect to see in the fourth picture?

Here's the first.

So that is what's-his-face.

Whose name I can't remember.

Next, please.

-That's Celia?

-Yes, but what's her surname?

-Was she in...?

I don't know.

Next, please.

Ben Johnson?

She's Celia Johnson.

Are they all Johnsons?

-But we need the next one.

-Oh, the fourth one.

-Don Johnson?

-D, C, B? So it'll be A.

Amy Johnson.

Would have been an acceptable answer.

We've actually got a picture

of Alan Johnson, MP.

Of whom I'm a big fan, but I can't

quite see him for the dazzle of that

vision next to him.

Magnificent, quite an understated shirt, there, but really,

doesn't he look wonderful?

Now, the question.

Why would Amy Johnson or

Alan Johnson be acceptable?

So they're all surnamed Johnson and we're going back,

so you've got Don Johnson, Celia Johnson,

Ben Johnson and then Amy or Alan Johnson.

That's right. D, C and B Johnson,

and I wanted an A Johnson

at the beginning there.

Verbivores, what would you like?

-Horned Viper, please.

-The Horned Viper.

What would come fourth in this sequence?

Here's the first.

Words Of The Year? That was a Word Of The Year.

-But I don't know what's next.

-It could be the smiley face emoji.

Yeah, was that the most recent one?

Is it worth going for now?

-Because we're not going to get anything...

-Yeah.

-Shall we go for it?

-In which order?

-The latest one is the, I'm sure it's the emoji.

-Yeah.

BUZZER

Emoji, the smiley face emoji.

Tell me something else.

A picture of a smiley face,

a smiley face emoji.

I'm afraid

I cannot give you the points.

I like it that you've come in after

one clue, but I can't give it to you.

So I'm going to show the next two in the sequence to the

Channel Islanders for a bonus point.

I think it's a colon and a close brackets.

Not it, I'm afraid. Now, Verbivores.

You are so nearly right, it breaks my heart.

You are right, it is the

Oxford Dictionary's Word Of The Year,

going forward towards 2015.

It was an emoji.

Is it the crying laughing one?

It was the crying face!

It was the crying and laughing.

And it's very important which one because of course they deliberated

which one, what is the most widely used.

And it is this.

So two things are going on.

Recognising the sequence and also

what is the emoji that they decided

fully represented what people were up to that year,

and it was the crying face.

Nearly brilliant, but not quite.

Channel Islanders, what would you like?

We'll go for Lion, please.

Lion, OK.

What would come fourth in this sequence?

Here's the first.

Next.

Next, please.

OK.

You can't have 5teen.

-Yes, you're right.

-Yeah. It's 18.

BUZZER

But need to say 8.

So I'm going to go for 18, "8 E-E-N".

I'm afraid that is not the answer.

So a bonus chance for you now, Verbivores.

We'll have to go for a number 9 followed by the word "teen".

...Is the right answer.

Are you only saying that because it isn't 18, so it must be 19?

We were going to go with 18 until they went 18, yeah.

So we got a bit lucky there.

Now, I would have thought your team

would get this one, because

it is a word question.

Obviously we've jumped over 15,

so it isn't just sequential.

These are the numbers where you can

put the whole original number

-before the word "teen".

-Yeah.

So for 18 you drop a T.

But the connection here is that

you're adding "teen" to the original

numbers. You can't do it with eight,

but you can with nine.

You get a bonus point, well done.

And you get the last question of the round,

the Eye of Horus.

What will come fourth in this sequence?

Here's the first.

-Yeah, next!

-Next, please.

Coke?

Coke Zero, Coke...Diet Coke.

But what's the sequence?

It's not Pepsi Zero, is it?

It's definitely Coke Zero.

Is it just going to be normal Coke?

Or is it Max? Is it normal then Max?

They don't do Max Coke, or something?

No, it's Pepsi Max, isn't it?

Yeah, but is there something extra for Coke?

-Shall we go next?

-Next.

Life. OK.

So we could put Max.

You what?

Three seconds.

BUZZER

Max?

Not the answer, I'm afraid.

So bonus chance for you now,

Channel Islanders?

Just Coca-Cola?

What do you mean by that?

As in a full sugar version of Coca-Cola.

Is the right answer.

Just an Original Coca-Cola.

What is the sequence?

So I think it's the amount of sugar that's in them.

No, it's not sugar, but calories.

-Right.

-Calories. So Coke Zero,

legally, it actually could

have up to four calories,

but at the moment it's supposed to

have zero. And then Diet Coke

could have one calorie,

Coke Life 89 calories,

and going up by calorific content,

Original Coke, 139 calories.

Doesn't sound like that much, does it?

Practically a health drink.

LAUGHTER

But the sugar, there is an awful lot of sugar.

That means at the end of Round 2,

the Verbivores have seven points,

the Channel Islanders have nine.

It's the Connecting Wall round, and the Verbivores' turn to go first

this time. So you have a choice, Lion or Water?

-Water, please.

-OK, the Water Wall.

Two and a half minutes to solve it as usual.

And that starts now.

Tartare, is that steak tartare, tartare sauce?

Steak Diane.

Salisbury, that's a steak, isn't it?

-Chateaubriand?

-Let's try those four.

There must be another one.

-Steak renton, is that a thing?

-I don't know.

We'll try it. Begbie sounds very steaky, doesn't it?

BB gun, machine gun.

Well done, yeah. Flare gun.

And field or spud gun.

Spud gun, OK.

That's one.

I think we should go back to the steaks.

Angel of the North, Another Place, Quantum Cloud, all sound sculpturey.

-Sick Boy?

-We'll try that.

Carpetbag?

We were almost there with the steaks, I'm sure.

Steak tartare, steak Diane, Salisbury steak.

I think we were having a go with Begbie, weren't we?

Let's do Chateaubriand, we'll start with that.

I must have done them all. OK, so.

You've got a minute left.

I wouldn't name a steak Sick Boy, either.

Salisbury was one.

Those are the four we did originally.

That one, that one and that one?

Yeah, shall we try...?

Is there another one?

That one.

Field?

OK, field... Field Marshal?

Field... Field...

This is going to annoy me now.

That's also the third time I've tried those four.

OK, so let's try...

There it is!

Three strikes now.

Ten seconds.

That one.

Go on. Pick one.

No, that's it. That's your three goes, and the Wall has frozen.

But you found two groups.

What about the connections?

Spud, BB, machine, flare.

-Types of gun.

-You can put "gun" after all of them.

The green group. Tartare, carpetbag, Salisbury, Chateaubriand.

-Steak.

-Those are the steaks.

And you can still get points for the connections in the groups you

didn't find. So let's resolve the wall.

There you go.

Diane, Sick Boy, Renton, Begbie.

Any ideas? Grand National winners.

I think they would not stand much chance in the Grand National.

I enjoyed hearing you talk about the steak Begbie.

Which I imagine is a steak

covered in heroin.

-They're characters from Trainspotting.

-Oh!

The Irvine Welsh novel. Yes, delicious steak Begbie,

I'll be having one of those later.

And the last group, Angel of the North, Quantum Cloud,

Another Place, Field.

They were the sculptures.

-Antony Gormley?

-Big, public...

By Antony Gormley.

They are sculptures by Antony Gormley.

So two points for the groups you found

and three for the connections, that's a total of five.

We'll bring back the Channel Islanders now and give them

a different Connecting Wall and see what they can do about solving it.

It'll be the Lion Wall for you, Islanders,

cos the Water has been taken.

You've got two and a half minutes, starting now.

So Cornet, let's see...

Sackbut, maybe?

Not heard of any of them.

-Genting?

-Try it, because I think, bugle, clarion, sackbut and cornet.

Cornet?

Recorder?

Echo, Clarion, Herald, Chronicle.

Those are newspapers.

Echo, Clarion, bit all over the place.

I'm going to stick with five. You keep looking.

OK, we've got that one.

So we've now we've got the musical instruments.

Cornet, bugle, clarion, sackbut.

-What was the other one?

-Serpent.

Is that one, yeah?

It's an old one. Go with old.

What's O2? How is O2 going with Hydro?

Three strikes and you're out, now.

O2, Oxygen? Oh, they're...

Hang on.

O2 and Hydro are both arenas, I think.

The Odyssey could well be.

So that's those three.

And then you've got Mousehole,

Redruth and maybe Par, do we think could be a Cornish town?

We've done that, I think.

Par, Genting, Mousehole, Redruth.

I tend to think maybe Genting,

cos that could be a brand or something.

-Try it, then. Go on, we can risk one.

-Risk it?

-Yeah.

That's it, you've solved the Wall, very well done!

What about the connections?

First group, Herald, Recorder, Chronicle, Echo.

I think they're all newspapers.

Local newspapers have those names.

The green group, Serpent, Cornet, Clarion, Sackbut.

We think they're musical instruments.

-Old musical instruments.

-Brass instruments.

They're brass instruments.

That's absolutely right,

brass instruments.

The next group, O2 and so forth, what are they?

I think they're arenas or music venues?

They're UK arenas, that's right.

The Genting Arena is in Birmingham,

part of a big complex in Birmingham.

The Odyssey in Belfast, all UK arenas.

And the last group, starting Bugle.

We think they're Cornish towns.

They're places in Cornwall.

That's it. So you've found all the groups,

you told me all the connections, that is a maximum of ten points.

-Well done.

-Thank you very much.

Let's have a look at the overall scores.

The Verbivores have 12 points, the Channel Islanders have 19.

Now it's time for the Missing Vowels round, which will decide who goes

through to Round 2 and who goes home.

So fingers on buzzers, teams.

I can tell you that the first group

are all things found on a curriculum vitae.

BUZZER

-Verbivores.

-Work experience.

Correct.

BUZZER

-Verbivores.

-References.

Correct.

BUZZER Verbivores.

Education and qualifications.

Correct.

BUZZER

-Verbivores.

-Additional skills.

Correct. Next category,

things that are said to help you fall asleep.

BUZZER Verbivores.

-Count sheep.

-Correct.

BUZZER Verbivores.

-Drink hot chocolate.

-Correct.

BUZZER Verbivores.

-Avoid blue light.

-Correct.

BUZZER Channel Islanders.

Take sleeping pill.

Correct. Next category,

BUZZER Channel Islanders.

Snoopy and Charlie Brown.

Correct.

BUZZER Verbivores.

Scooby-Doo and Shaggy.

Correct.

BUZZER Verbivores.

-Dogbert and Dilbert.

-Correct.

BUZZER

-Santa...

-Verbivores.

Santa's Little Helper and The Simpsons.

Correct. Next category,

BUZZER Channel Islanders.

-Cheese.

-Correct.

BUZZER Verbivores.

-Iron.

-Correct.

END OF ROUND MUSIC

No time to give me that answer,

which is "scare", because the bell

has gone for the end of the quiz.

And looking at the final scores after a heated Round 4,

I can tell you that the winners, with 23 points,

and through to the next round

are the Verbivores.

What a catch up in that round.

Channel Islanders, you've finished

with a brilliant 22 points.

Just one behind.

Really unlucky. You led all the way

but the wordy skills of your opponents just pipped you there.

Thank you very much for playing.

Thank you for watching, and see you next week.

That is, unless you're part of some future reptilian super race that's

ruled the Earth for millions of years and are watching the show

because it's been found preserved for eternity

on Betamax in a peat bog, perhaps thanks to some enthusiast

for that ill-fated tape technology who lived in a peat bog.

In which case, we won't see you next week and you probably don't

understand what I'm saying.

But thanks for watching anyway and do have a look at the website if

it's still there. Goodbye.