Episode 7 Pointless Celebrities

CHEERING

Thank you very much indeed. Hello, I am Alexander Armstrong,

and a very warm welcome to a special celebrity edition of Pointless -

the quiz show that puts obscure knowledge to the test.

Every single question on Pointless has been asked to 100 people before the show.

So, to be in with a chance of winning our final round jackpot,

our celebrities need to come up with the answers that the FEWEST

of our 100 people could think of.

Let's meet our Pointless celebrities.

APPLAUSE

Pointless celebrities.

Ha! Because, first up, we have Helen Lederer and Harriet Thorpe.

CHEERING

Wow!

Well, a very, very warm welcome to you both.

-It's great to have you here.

-Thank you.

-Now, of course,

we know you as leading actresses, comediennes.

You performed together in Absolutely Fabulous,

but you've known each other for ages?

-About 30 years, I think.

-We're quite old.

-Young! Ever youthful.

-Yes.

Ever youthful. Where did you first meet?

BOTH: We were at the same drama school.

-At different times...

-Yeah.

-..since you asked.

Girls On Top was where we first worked together.

-The comedy programme.

-Indeed.

-Harriet, of course, you're the Queen of the West End now.

-Bless you.

-No, you are!

-She likes you now.

-You are!

-Why, didn't she?

-I always liked him!

No, she liked him before, but she responds well to flattery.

Theatre, comedy, all of these things are going to be good for both you.

-Musical theatre.

-You'd think!

Come on! I'm sure you'll waltz through these, should they come up.

-They won't, obviously.

-No. Sport, hopefully.

Do you have categories in fabrics, velveteens...?

-Yes.

-Plaids?

-Yes.

-I'm quite interested in materials.

-OK.

-OK.

-Cushions.

OK. I will see what I can do.

-OK.

-Yeah.

-Thanks, Richard.

It's going to be the periodic table and geography.

-My favourite!

-Thank you.

OK, listen, lots of things for you to delight us with later.

Very best of luck, it's great to have you on the show.

Thank you so much, Helen and Harriet. Brilliant.

And next, we welcome Neil and Christine Hamilton.

CHEERING

You're our only married couple on the show today,

-so I think that's going to...

-Married at the moment!

-Yes.

Might not last!

It's going to give you a distinct advantage.

Is that right, Neil?

She's in charge, so I'm sure it will, yes.

Look, you've both worked in politics.

Neil, obviously, is a former MP.

Christine, you've worked in the House of Commons for 23 years.

A little bit longer than that, but I'll accept 23 years.

OK, take 23! You will survive Pointless, surely, won't you?

No, I don't think we will, because we're absolutely hopeless

at about 99% of the categories that come up.

We know nothing about pop music, about sport,

about popular culture, about television.

I mean, literally nothing.

You describe yourself as a media butterfly, Christine.

I think that's just the perfect thing to be. A media butterfly.

Just taking little sips from...

Is that what butterflies do?

-Little sips from flowers?

-Yes, yes, that's right.

They alight for a moment, take their pleasure and move on.

I've never seen Christine take little sips.

LAUGHTER

But I would say that is the PERFECT preparation for Pointless.

And Neil, you appeared in The Rocky Horror Show.

-I did indeed.

-So, theatre, there we are.

-There's a whole category...

-Sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll.

-Yeah!

Fishnet tights and stilettos.

And may I commend you on NOT wearing a bow tie for us today.

Well, thank you. But I am wearing the fishnet tights.

You think he's joking!

Anyway, Neil and Christine, it's great to have you here.

-I'm sure you'll get further than just the first round, but lovely to have you.

-Thank you.

And next, we welcome Liz McClarnon and Antony Costa.

CHEERING

Now, obviously, you're both famous for being in bands.

Not just knowing about bands, you've been in them.

Liz, you were in Atomic Kitten.

-Antony, of course, you were in Blue.

-Yeah.

So, Liz and Antony, where did you become friends?

-Well, we were on the same record label.

-Yeah.

Our bands were on the same record label,

and we went to America to do that videos at the same time.

Yeah, and then we just became really good friends from that.

And we went out together... Not boyfriend, girlfriend!

-Yeah, no, never.

-Nothing like that.

-We are like an old married couple.

-We are.

-We are.

-You should've!

-Surely that's what the record company hoped for?

-She's too tall!

-She's too tall.

-But we are like an old married couple, though.

-We're a bit like that, yeah.

-Sort of.

-Apart from...

Antony, you did...

-You did Eurovision last year?

-I did.

I love it, so I hope there's Eurovision subjects today. I've always been a fan.

I mean, I learned about countries I've never even heard of.

Literally, we were just inundated with different countries coming in.

Obviously, being in Germany, in Dusseldorf, we had, like...

Every day was a different time we had to rehearse,

and if you were late on rehearsal time, you weren't allowed on-stage.

Me and the boys had to literally...

The minute we were on, the clock was ticking

and you had 30 minutes to rehearse.

And if it wasn't right, tough, you have to wait to next day.

It's real man's work, Eurovision.

LAUGHTER

It is, it is.

I know, it's like working on the rigs.

LAUGHTER

Loads of lunch breaks.

-LAUGHTER

-Very good.

Liz and Antony, great to have you on the show.

Very, very best of luck.

APPLAUSE

Ladies and gentlemen, finally we've got Russell Grant and Carol Smillie.

APPLAUSE

Now, Russell, of course we all know you as our top astrologer

but of course more recently, more pertinently, fantastic dancer.

The man with all the moves on Strictly Come Dancing.

And Carol obviously is one of our country's favourite

-TV presenters. Notably Changing Rooms.

-Yep.

So, between you, I think you've got quite a few bases covered.

How did you become friends?

THEY LAUGH

We just worked out it was two years ago this...

-This month.

-That we met.

And we worked on a cookery programme.

I know exactly what that was.

It was a famous chef doing Kitchen Burnout.

Sheer hell. It was.

We bonded over his wrath.

It was amazing.

I did the voice-over for that show.

-Oh!

-Isn't that weird?

A show I did voice-over for.

Yeah, because you do so few voiceovers. That's amazing.

LAUGHTER

But we became very close friends,

-and we haven't stopped being close friends since.

-No.

Russell, your, your... I can't call that eyeshadow.

-There is no shadow in there.

-No.

Well, unfortunately, you see,

the make-up ladies here were all from Strictly.

So when I walked in they thought I was going to come on and do a samba.

So what they did was, they decided to put a little bit of Venus glitter on my eyes.

-Oh, lovely.

-And I feel so at home.

-You're jealous, aren't you?

Very.

LAUGHTER

Very. But you are going to do a samba, I'm sure. Aren't you?

-I'll do a little one.

-Go on!

-Woo!

-See this.

APPLAUSE

It's brilliant having you both on the show.

-Russell and Carol, thanks so much for joining us.

-Thank you.

APPLAUSE

We look forward to discovering all your hidden knowledge throughout the show.

There's only one person left for me to introduce.

He's the man who makes clever people feel stupid.

He's my Pointless friend.

-He's Richard.

-Hiya.

APPLAUSE

How are you, are you well?

Yeah, I'm very well.

-It's exciting being on Saturday evenings, isn't it?

-Isn't it?

-For us.

-For us.

Normally we're only on during the week.

It's weird, you know when you used to be at school?

Sometimes you'd go to the shops with your mum and you'd see a teacher.

It would be weird. They'd be so out of place. That's like us for our regular Pointless viewers.

Like that, it's like seeing a teacher who's made no effort

in recognition of the fact it's the weekend.

Haven't dressed up or anything.

Haven't changed a bit.

Not put any glitter on his tie. Like Russell has.

I was going to say, you know it's Saturday when someone

has got glittery eyeshadow and does a samba.

I suspect Round One is not going to go down very well with everybody.

Round Two you'll love, if you get that far.

-Round One, you're not going to like.

-Excellent.

Thank you very much, Richard.

All our questions have been put to

100 people before the show but we are looking for the obscure answers they didn't get.

To stay in the game and be in with a chance of winning our jackpot,

all you need do is score as few points as possible.

Now, what everyone's trying to do is find a pointless answer.

That's an answer that none of our 100 people knew.

Every time that happens, we will add 250 quid to the jackpot.

As today's show is a special celebrity show,

each of our celebrities is playing for a nominated charity.

So we start off with a jackpot of £2,500.

APPLAUSE

Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

APPLAUSE

So, in this round, each of you must give me one answer

and you cannot confer with your partner.

Whichever pair has the highest score

at the end of the round will be eliminated.

If you give me an incorrect answer, you score the maximum of 100 points

so do try and avoid those if you can.

OK, our first category is...

Capital cities.

Can you all decide in your pairs who will go first and who's second?

Whoever's first, please step up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what the question is.

Here it comes. We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name

as many capital cities of EU member states as they could. Richard.

Yeah, we're looking for the capital city of any

full member states of the European Union as of the start

of 2012, please.

So, work out what countries are in the European Union and give us

the capital of one of those.

Very best of luck.

Thank you very much, Richard.

Now, Helen and Harriet, you drew lots before the show.

And today, you are going first.

Well, it's quite dull

and it's to do with chocolates which has triggered me to say Brussels.

-Brussels.

-Oh, no, you're making me doubt.

An obscure EU member state.

Helen says Brussels.

Let's see if it's right and if it is,

let's see how many of our 100 people said Brussels.

It's right.

Down it goes.

26.

26 of our 100 said Brussels.

So your score is 26.

I think that's a pretty good answer. 26, not a bad score at all.

Neil, we are looking for capital cities of EU member states.

-I have a hunch you might be quite good at this.

-We'll see.

Well, I'll go for Valletta.

Valletta?

The capital of Malta.

Valletta, says Neil.

let's see if that's right, if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said Valletta.

Very well done.

Very, very well done indeed. Two, Neil.

APPLAUSE

That's a terrific answer.

Valletta scores Neil two points.

Yeah, absolutely. Capital of Malta. Its population, 6,000.

Are you allowed, as a former Conservative minister,

to get a question right about the EU?

Is that acceptable? LAUGHTER

Yeah, well, know your enemy, I say.

Ah, you love 'em. You know you love 'em.

Antony.

-Yes?

-What is the most obscure capital

of an EU member state you can summon to mind?

Obviously, being in the Eurovision...

-You see!

-I'm going to go Reykjavik.

-Reykjavik?

-Capital of Iceland.

-Reykjavik, says Antony.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

Oh! Antony!

He looks like he's going to appeal. That looks like an appeal.

LAUGHTER

I will gladly hear your appeal.

I'm not saying a word.

I just thought it would be an obscure answer.

Unfortunately, Antony, I'm afraid that is an incorrect answer

which means you score the maximum of 100 points.

That's more than, more than

the UK have scored at Eurovision for years!

LAUGHTER

111 we scored.

-I take it back.

-I'm joking, I'm joking.

This would be the perfect show to score nil points.

LAUGHTER

Look, Reykjavik is a good answer. It is the capital of Iceland

but Iceland is not an EU member state, I'm afraid.

-Sorry.

-It's all right.

-That's all right.

We can petition them into joining, if you like

but we'd have to be pretty quick about it.

Carol.

Remember we are looking for capital cities of EU member states.

I'll probably play it slightly safe then and say...

Lisbon.

Lisbon, says Carol.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said Lisbon.

It is right.

Down it goes, 28.

Well done, darling.

APPLAUSE

28.

Quite a surprisingly low score considering the treaty, but there we are.

Did you really just say "Quite a surprisingly low score considering the treaty"?

Yeah.

-Yeah.

-I think 28. It's a very good answer, Carol.

Have you been to Lisbon on your travels?

-Yes.

-Reported on Lisbon?

-Yes. I holiday in Portugal quite a lot so...

-Do you? Is it nice?

..I knew it was safe.

-It's lovely. It's beautiful.

-There you go.

That's a little extra Saturday night value for you there.

Lisbon, very nice this time of year.

-Don't do that on daytime, do we?

-No, we don't.

Don't do any travel tips at all.

No, we don't. And with good reason.

We should start doing that. That would be amazing.

We should.

Carol, are you around every single weekday for the next 18 months?

-I can make sure I am, yeah.

-That would be great.

Thank you very much, Richard. We're halfway through the rounds, let's look at the scores, as they stand.

Neil, what a fabulous answer there with Valletta. That scored you two.

You are, unsurprisingly, the low scorers on this pass.

Then we go up to 26 with Helen and Harriet.

Up to 28 where we find Carol and Russell

and then we scoot up a little bit to 100 where we find Antony and Liz.

-Listen, the game is not yet over.

-I know.

Anything can happen in the next pass.

-I hope so.

-OK. We're going to come back down the line.

Can the second players please take the places at the podium?

Now then, Russell.

Capital cities of EU member states.

Liz and Antony are the high scorers on 100.

You're on 28 which means a score of 71 or less.

71 or less, Russell,

will see you comfortably into the next round.

Do you want it?

If by "it", you mean an answer to the question,

-Russell...

-Do you want it?

..I most certainly do!

I'm so glad you said that.

Ljubljana.

-Capital of Slovenia.

-Ljubljana.

There is your red line, Russell.

If you get below that red line, you'll have less than Liz and Antony

and you will be through to the next round.

Let's see if it's right and how many people said Ljubljana.

It's right.

Oh, you beauty, Russell, look at that, down it goes.

Oh, ho, ho, ho!

APPLAUSE

That's a fabulous answer, scores you two.

Takes your total up to 30.

Richard.

That's a brilliant answer, Russell. Very well played.

See, all that glitter, it's hiding the eyes of a quiz of assassin. You see that?

-He knows what he's doing, doesn't he?

-Mm-hmm.

Very good. Now, Liz. Liz, I'm afraid you are the high scorers.

We need a lovely, low-scoring obscure EU capital city.

Geography is my worst subject.

Is my worst and also, Lisbon is what I was going to go for

so I'm really, really, really lost and also I'm so nervous.

I'm just going to say Copenhagen.

Copenhagen. There's no redline for you I'm afraid,

because you're the high scorers, but we'll see if Copenhagen is right

and if it is, let's see how many people said Copenhagen.

Well done, Liz.

Very well done. Down it goes. Look at that, 10! That's an excellent score.

APPLAUSE

Brilliant answer. Lovely low score. 10.

That takes your total up to 110. Copenhagen.

Yes, no need to be nervous, Liz. It's a very good answer.

Capital of Denmark.

You kept yourself in the round, possibly depending on

what Harriet does.

No pressure, then!

No, did you not hear what I just said?

-It's, like, loads of pressure.

-Thanks. Cos that's really helpful.

Thanks.

Good, I thought it was being slightly unhelpful.

-But if it's helpful...

-No, no, no.

-Would you stop, you two?

Christine, the great news is... It doesn't matter what you score,

you're still through to the next round.

-Wow.

-The even better news is, you can give us a brilliant answer now.

If the pressure's off, I'm going to play safe and say Warsaw.

Warsaw, says Christine.

No red line for you because you're through anyway.

Warsaw, is it right, how many people said Warsaw?

It's right.

Down it goes. Six!

APPLAUSE

Six, Christine.

Takes your total up to eight. Your total is in single figures.

Very impressive indeed. Eight. Richard.

Well played, Christine. It's a low score.

I think perhaps people are slightly unsure whether Poland are in the EU.

-But they are.

-Now, Harriet.

So, we're looking for the capital cities of EU countries.

Here's a moment of truth.

The high scorers at 110 are Liz and Antony.

You are on 26, a score of 83 or less

will see you into the next round.

I think I know cities and then I...

doubt it when I say it so...

Just say a city.

-Go on.

-Shall I?

-Go on.

-All right.

A capital city...

Of an EU member state.

Prague.

Prague. There's your red line. Lovely and high.

Prague just has to be right, I would say.

Let's see if it is, Prague, is it right? How many people said Prague?

Yes, it's right. And you're through to the next round.

Very, very well done, Harriet.

Ten.

APPLAUSE

10 for Prague. Very well done. Takes your total up to 36. Richard.

Pressure, what pressure? Very good answer, Harriet.

Very well played. Capital of the Czech Republic.

-Of the where?

-Czech Republic.

Do you know what, I'm so fed up with you having a go at the way

I say Czech Republic.

-Every show.

-Every show.

-Give it a rest.

-OK, I will...

Or, learn how to say Czech Republic.

How did I say it?

CLUCKS LIKE A CHICKEN

LAUGHTER

Sound like you were laying an egg.

Let's look at the pointless answers, there's a couple.

Well done if you said Tallinn, which is

the capital of Estonia, or Sofia, which is the capital of Bulgaria.

Other low scorers as well, Nicosia was a low scorer.

-Oh, mate!

-Vilnius, Lithuania, that was a low scorer.

-Any, anything you recognise there, Antony?

-Nicosia!

-And Sofia, you said Sofia!

-And Sofia as well.

I'm half Cypriot, ain't I?

LAUGHTER

My mum and dad are going to be right having a laugh at this tonight!

Let's take a look at the top answers.

These are the ones that most of our 100 people said.

Berlin would have scored you 57 points.

Paris, 86.

And London, 86.

86?

There's 14 people don't know London is...

the capital of an EU country.

Thanks very much, Richard.

So, the losing pair with the highest score, is Liz and Antony.

Liz and Antony, Liz and Antony.

-You can't leave now!

-I don't want to!

-You've only just arrived.

Liz, where, where does the blame lie, I ask?

You know what? It could have gone either way.

Cos I, geography, shocking for me and that was a total guess.

-So...

-And I just thought, Iceland.

I'd have thought that as well actually.

It's in Europe. It's just not in the EU.

I thought it was going to be a pointless one,

but obviously it's not. Never mind.

-It was pointless in its own way.

-Yes.

-It was!

-Cheers, Richard.

-Yeah.

Cheers, mate, I ain't going to argue with you, you're tall.

LAUGHTER

It's been fabulous having you on the show.

I'm so sorry to have to say goodbye to you so soon but Liz and Antony,

brilliant contestants.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs it's now time for Round Two.

Now, clearly there's only room for two celebrity pairs

in our head-to-head so one of the teams in front of me now

will be leaving us at the end of this round.

OK, our category for Round Two is...

Oh, ho, no!

Disney.

Can you all decide in your pairs who will go first, who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, our question concerns Disney animals. Richard.

Yeah, we're going to see your list of six Disney

animal characters on each pass.

All you have to tell us is what type of animal is that character.

If you give us a nice obscure answer, one that very few of our 100 knew,

you'll score fewer points.

Give us a wrong answer though, you'll score 100 points.

Six on each pass, 12 in all to get at home. Best of luck.

Thanks, Richard. We're looking for the types of animal these characters are.

And here we are. We have got...

I'll read those all again.

They are the characters, what kind of animals are they?

As ever, you're trying to find the one

you think the fewest of our 100 people knew.

Harriet, you're first up.

Is this a good board for you?

I know some of the answers.

I'm going to go with Thumper.

Who's a rabbit.

Thumper, a rabbit.

Sounds to me like you've just taken someone else's answer.

Thumper, a rabbit, says Harriet.

Is it right and if it is, how many of our 100 people said

Thumper was a rabbit?

It's right.

-79.

-Sorry.

APPLAUSE

Richard?

Thumper, well played, Harriet. Big score, but at least not 100. From Bambi, of course.

1942.

Thank you very much, Richard. Christine, we come to you now.

We are looking for the animals that these

Disney characters are portrayed as.

I think you, you wanted to say Thumper?

The only one I've ever even heard of in my life before is Thumper,

thank you, Harriet!

And you said you knew several

so why have you gone for the one that most people know?

Why couldn't you have gone for an obscure one? I have no idea!

-That was clever, wasn't it?

-Tactics.

-Tactics!

never thought about... I have...

I have absolutely no idea at all, and so 100 is about to pop up.

I'm going... I just don't know.

Timon the tiger.

It's not right, I've no idea. I don't know any of them.

Timon The Tiger would be a great children's book, wouldn't it?

-It would.

-Timon The Tiger.

But it's not right. Get it over with.

-Timon The Tiger.

-Lovely.

-Brilliant.

Timon. Timon the tiger. Let's see if it's right.

If it is, let's see how many people knew that answer.

Oh!

-I'm afraid...

-I just don't know any of them, I'm afraid.

I've never heard of any of them. Not that I can't bring it from the back of my mind. I don't know.

I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer, Christine, which means

you score the maximum of 100 points.

I'm sorry. OK. Now, Russell. Ah, ah, hah, hah.

It may not all be over, Christine.

Russell, you're the last person to have this board.

You can talk us through the board, if you like.

No, I'd rather not.

Erm... I'm on the edge of disaster!

Remy. I don't know.

I'm going to go for Remy and I'm going to go for a skunk.

Remy...a skunk.

-That a complete stab in the dark?

-I don't know why.

Erm, Remy a skunk, says Russell. Is it right and if it is, how many people knew that answer?

Remy the skunk.

Bad luck.

I haven't got any kids. I don't know about Disney.

I've got two goldfish and a carp.

LAUGHTER

You're just being koi!

LAUGHTER

Good line. I've just been coy.

LAUGHTER

Russell, unfortunately that's an incorrect answer which means you score the maximum of 100 points.

Richard.

Yeah, and that is tough. You say that your pets are goldfish.

Remy is a goldfish.

Not really, not really!

He's a... Remy's a rat from Ratatouille.

Would have scored five points.

Timon is a meerkat from The Lion King. 16 points.

Robin Hood one at the top there is a fox in Robin Hood the animated film.

41 points.

Abu is in Aladdin and is a monkey.

Would have scored you 21. And Tuke is a pointless answer.

It's from the film Brother Bear, well done if you said Moose.

Pointless answer.

-Tuke the moose.

-Tuke the moose.

Wow.

Tuke the moose.

-Tuke the moose.

-That's the name of my first rap album.

-Yeah?

-Yeah, Richard Osman, Tuke The Moose.

That probably means something really rude.

Yeah.

So, what happened last night? Did you Tuke the moose?

-LAUGHTER

-Did you go out?

-I, I certainly...

-I couldn't possibly say!

Certainly, the moose was tuked.

-Can't say if I did it myself.

-OK, very good.

OK, let's take a look at the scores. We're halfway through the round. 79.

Who would have thought?

Our lowest score, our only correct answer in the pass.

So, yes, Harriet and Helen looking very strong on 79

and we have a tie at the top of the board there.

Russell and Carol and Christine and Neil both on 100 points.

So, it's going to be a tussle between Neil and Carol.

That I'd like to watch.

-LAUGHTER

-Bring it on.

-Easy, Tiger.

Very best luck to the pair of you.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK, we're going to put six more Disney characters on the board,

and here they come.

We've got...

I shall read them all one more time.

Now remember, we're looking for the type of animal

that each of these characters is.

And obviously trying to find the one that least people knew.

Now then, Carol, you're the high scorers on 100.

We need a really good, low-scoring answer from you.

Well, one I know and another I think I know

so I might do a little tactical number.

And go for Dumbo the elephant.

Dumbo the elephant says Carol.

Let's see if that's right. No redline because you're the highest scorers.

We just have to see if it'll go as low as you hope it will.

Dumbo, is it an elephant? How many people knew that answer?

Oooh!

-Oh, ho, ho.

-95!

-95!

-Go on, Neil!

APPLAUSE

-Wow, 95, Carol.

-Yeah, a bit obvious.

Takes your total up to 195.

-That is a little bit better than 200.

-Not much.

Richard?

95 is better than 100, and that might be significant

as this round progresses.

I think it will!

Neil.

OK, so we are looking for the animals that these Disney

characters are portrayed as.

-Oh, Lord.

-Well, this is payback time for Round One.

That was the only one I knew!

So this is going to be a complete and utter guess.

I'll go for Duchess and I'll guess it's a cat.

Duchess, what do you think, Christine?

I don't think that's right.

-Shall I change my mind then?

-You can't.

We'll see, your red line's nice and high.

I think if you are right, you might be all right.

Good at this.

Is Duchess a cat and if it is, how many people said it? Duchess, cat.

You are right.

You are through to the head-to-head.

Down it goes, 20.

APPLAUSE

20. 20 for Duchess the cat, takes your total to 120.

I will never live this down.

Because I said he was wrong.

You know what, Christine, I'm sure you've done worse.

-Because, Duchess is from...

-Well done!

Oh, I'm sorry, darling, I ever doubted you.

I've never won anything before.

Apart from the odd election.

Duchess is from the Aristocats from 1970. Aristocats.

So, then, the good news is, Helen, you are through to the next round whatever happens.

You'll not overtake the high score of Carol and Russell.

-Talk us through the board. Do you know them.

-Do you know?

Nope.

Mufasa, Mufasa, I know Mufasa is the one to go for,

but I can't think of an animal.

You're through to the next round anyway. So...

-Well, a leopard, obviously.

-Mufasa.

A leopard. Mufasa the leopard.

Let's see if it's right and how many said it.

No red line for you because you are through.

Is Mufasa a leopard? How many people said it if he is?

Oh!

Bad luck, incorrect.

It scores you the maximum of 100 points but couldn't matter less.

You are through to the next round. 179 your total. Richard.

Yes, not a leopard, Helen. Harriet, do you know that one?

A lion.

A lion. Absolutely right from The Lion King.

Would have scored you 37 points.

Flik is an ant from A Bug's Life. It's also in Toy Story 2.

Copper is a dog from The Fox And The Hound. That's five points.

And Mrs Caloway is a pointless answer.

Very well done if you know that Mrs Caloway

is a cow in Home On The Range.

There we are. Thanks, Richard, well, at the end of Round Two,

the losing celebrity pair with the highest score, Russell and Carol.

-It's all right.

-It's all right, no shame, no shame.

We're going out clubbing.

Oh, I bet you are!

We are actually quite pleased.

Apart from our charities.

We are very upset for our charities but we're going off.

Make sure you don't tuke the moose!

LAUGHTER

Russell and Carol, I'm so sorry we have to say goodbye to you.

-It's been lovely having you on the show.

-Thank you for inviting us.

Brilliant. Wonderful.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining two celebrity pairs, things are about to get

even more exciting now, as we enter the head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

Well, congratulations, Neil and Christine, Helen and Harriet.

You are now only one round away from the final and the chance

to play for the jackpot, which currently stands at £2,500.

APPLAUSE

Now, obviously, only one pair can play for that money, so to decide

which pair it's going to be, you are now going to go head-to-head.

For each question you'll be shown five options on the board.

Each pair needs to pick just one answer,

but you are now allowed to confer.

All you need is to come up with an answer scoring less

than the other pair and you will win that question.

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for the jackpot.

Let's play the head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

OK, here is your first question. And it concerns...

Nobel Peace Prize winners, Richard.

On this question we'll show you five photos of people

who've won the Nobel Peace Prize, all you have to do is find the most

obscure of those, best of luck.

Thanks very much.

So, let's reveal our five Nobel Peace Prize winners and we have got.

So there we are. Here is our gallery Of Nobel Peace Prize winners.

Neil and Christine, you've played best throughout the show so far so you get to go first.

Yeah, OK.

We have an answer.

We have a joint answer

so there would be no matrimonial disharmony if we get it wrong.

-Well, no more than usual, anyway!

-Is that agreed?

We are agreed on the answer?

That's very formal.

We've got to that stage in our marriage, we shake hands.

-That answer any time you want.

-Henry Kissinger.

-Henry Kissinger you are saying.

-A.

-A.

There we are, thank you very much. A, Henry Kissinger.

Helen and Harriet.

OK, well, we know the person but we don't know the full name.

-You can talk through them if you like.

-OK.

Just do some thinking out loud and then submit your favourite answer.

We were going to do what they did. I was going to be clever,

said he looked like Bernard Levin but actually he was Henry Kissinger.

So, that's no good.

-Mother Teresa.

-Mother Teresa, obviously Nelson Mandela.

But the wonderful woman D.

I, it's, it's something like...

Sue Lon Lin

because she's very important

but I also know somebody personally called Sue Lon Lin

so I don't think that that's quite right, the formation.

I don't think there's a lot in it but I'll go with you

and then I can blame you, because there's nothing in it.

OK. So we'll go with C.

Because Harriet said.

C. Because Harriet said and just tell me the answer again. C is?

-BOTH: Mother Teresa.

-Mother Teresa, OK, so, we have Neil and Christine

saying A, Henry Kissinger.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said it.

Henry Kissinger.

Lovely, it's right.

24.

APPLAUSE

24 for Henry Kissinger.

Helen and Harriet are saying C is Mother Teresa.

Let's see if that's right

and if it is, how many of our 100 people said that.

24 is what you have to beat.

It. Ooh! Ah. It...

APPLAUSE

92.

Ooh, she's famous.

She is famous, but I thought Nelson Mandela was more famous.

-Well, we knew Kissinger.

-Yeah, we did.

-Yeah, I know.

-Not that I'm a bad loser.

-Sue Lon Lin. If only...

After one question, Neil and Christine

are up 1-0. Richard.

Yeah, that was a tough board once Henry Kissinger had been taken off.

Well played, Neil and Christine.

And you're right, if you'd have named D you would have won the point,

but let's go through the whole board.

A is Kissinger.

B is the 2011 winner, a Liberian peace activist, Leymah Gbowee.

would have scored one point.

Very good answer.

There's Mother Teresa. Aung San Suu Kyi.

Would have scored you 11 points. Only scores 11 points.

Burmese democracy campaigner, and E is

Nelson Mandela, less famous than Mother Teresa, funnily enough.

-Wow.

-He'll be gutted. 87 points. 87 points.

OK. Well, here comes your second question, Helen and Harriet,

you have to win this question to stay in the game.

BOTH: OK.

Good luck, here it comes.

It concerns...

Great!

The 1966 Fifa World Cup.

-Bring it on.

-Richard.

It's fine, we've got this, we've got this nailed.

On this board we'll show five clues to facts about the 1966 World Cup.

You just have to give us the most obscure answer you can.

Best, genuinely, best of luck.

OK, thank you, Richard.

Let's reveal our five clues to facts about the 1966 World Cup

and here they come. We have got...

I'll read them all one more time.

OK, so there we are. Now, Helen and Harriet, you go first this time.

Well, Harriet has huge confidence

and she's desperate to say something. Go on.

Thank you so much.

I don't know any obscure ones but I think I know the most obvious one.

-Go on.

-Let's start again. Do you know any of them?

Thank you.

So, erm, the manager of the England team.

I believe was Bobby Moore.

Bobby Moore, we have.

As the manager of the England team.

Neil and Christine.

Well this, it is one of our many Achilles' heels is football.

We were around in '66. You haven't got a clue, have you?

I can see the face of the manager of the England team

but I can't remember his name.

-We can't go for that because they've gone for that one.

-Yes you can.

You can give another answer for that question if you think theirs was a wrong answer.

We don't, we have no idea about the Portuguese player.

We have no idea any Asian sides, that would be a complete guess.

We don't know anything about the dog and we don't even know what

the Jules Rimet Trophy is.

That is, that is the World Cup.

That is the World Cup.

All right.

The only one that I can go for, and I'm probably wrong is that

I think I can see Willie.

Pardon?

LAUGHTER

I think I can see Willie, but...

I am totally unconfident, but I'm going to say that he was a lion.

-You think World Cup Willie was a lion.

-Well, I don't really, but...

World Cup Willie, a lion. And Bobby Moore,

the manager of the England team.

In the order given, Helen and Harriet said

Bobby Moore was manager of the England team, let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many people said it.

Oh! Bad luck, I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer.

I know, because I'm dyslexic. So I read it for something else.

She was going for the sympathy vote, she was wrong. OK?

Don't worry, we are, too.

Neil and Christine have said that World Cup Willie was a lion.

Let's see if that's right.

All it has to be is right but let's see how far down it goes if it is.

It's broken.

It is right.

It is right.

APPLAUSE

27.

APPLAUSE

27. All it had to be was right.

And it was, which means after two questions only,

Neil and Christine, you are through to the final 2-0. Richard.

They have been saved by two very lucky cats in this game.

Duchess the cat and Willie the lion.

-Bobby Moore was the...

-Captain.

-The captain, absolutely, absolutely.

So picked up the trophy and all that stuff.

But the manager was Sir Alf Ramsey.

I knew it was Alf Ramsey. I did. I knew.

-I knew it.

-He would have scored you 25 points.

And would have won you the point as well.

Yeah. That's tough.

The dog that located the Jules Rimet Trophy was Pickles for 19 points.

The Asian side that reached the quarter finals.

Perhaps surprisingly, North Korea.

North Korea, famously, did very well in that World Cup, nine points.

Portuguese player who won the Golden Boot, Eusebio, 21 points.

So, best answer on that board was

North Korea. Well done if you said that at home.

Oh, well, thank you very much, Richard.

The losing pair at the end of the head-to-head is Helen and Harriet.

Oh, you've come storming through.

You had Kissinger whipped from under you but said he looked like Bernard Levin.

-I'm glad for my friends here. I'm glad for the others.

-Yeah.

-Not!

LAUGHTER

It's been lovely having you on the show. Thank you both so much for coming along.

Brilliant.

APPLAUSE

For Neil and Christine, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Neil and Christine.

You fought off the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot

for your nominated charity.

At the end of today's show, the jackpot stands at £2,500.

APPLAUSE

So, in the first two rounds, the lowest scorers.

You had a lucky escape in the first round with the capital cities

of EU member states.

Second round, Disney.

You nearly came a cropper there. But actually,

as it happens you were all right.

You made it through, covered yourselves in glory.

Is this streak going to continue, I wonder?

The rules are very simple. To win that money, all you have to do is find a pointless answer.

We haven't had any pointless answers today. You only have to find one now

and you will go home with that £2,500 for your charity.

Firstly, you have to choose a category and you have these five options.

They are:

It ain't pop stars, or sporting awards,

probably ain't London transport.

Iconic actors, it depends how far back you go.

Either London transport or classical music I would think.

Hang on, we do know a lot of iconic actors

but not if they're asking about the last 10, 15, 20 years.

I wouldn't go for iconic actors. You'd be on your own if you did that.

Why choose London transport?

Well, I've been on a bus.

LAUGHTER

-We've got bus passes.

-What have you decided?

If I was on my own, I wouldn't go near London transport

because I can't imagine what the questions would be.

-Classical music.

-Classical music.

OK, let's find out what the question is going to be. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many Tchaikovsky operas and ballets as they could.

Tchaikovsky operas and ballets.

We are simply looking for the title as used in the UK of any opera or ballet by Tchaikovsky, please.

OK, you have up to one minute to come up with three answers.

All you have to do to win that jackpot of £2,500 for your charities

is for one of those answers to be pointless.

Let's put 60 seconds on the clock.

There they are, your time starts now.

-Queen Of Spades is pretty obscure.

-Eugene Onegin is less obscure.

We need one that is boltingly obscure. It's over to you, ballet.

You're better at ballet than me.

But they're all well-known.

Um...

I think opera is perhaps less well-known.

Come up with another Tchaikovsky opera.

Well, we've only got to have one that works. Oh, lordy.

Oh!

My mind's gone a complete blank.

I can't think of any ballets except blooming Swan Lake.

And Sleeping Beauty, and that's hopeless.

Um... oh, dear.

-Firebird's not...

-That's Stravinsky.

-Exactly.

Sylphide's not...

Ten seconds left.

-What happens if we only come up with two?

-We need three answers.

We need three. Yes.

-My mind's gone a blank.

-OK, your time is up.

We were looking for Tchaikovsky operas and ballets

and I need three answers from you.

-We'll go for Queen Of Spades.

-and Eugene Onegin.

-Eugene Onegin.

-And whatever there are.

I don't think it matters, because they're all well known.

-Let's be stupid and go for Swan Lake.

-We'll go for Swan Lake.

Swan Lake. OK, there we are.

Of those three answers, which do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-Queen Of Spades.

-Queen Of Spades, we shall put last.

I guess Swan Lake, you want to put first.

I think so, let's get that out of the way quickly.

OK, let's put them up on the board in that order, and here they are.

There they are.

Your first answer, Swan Lake.

Tchaikovsky operas and ballets.

You said this was your least confident shot at a pointless answer.

You only have to find one pointless answer to win

that £2,500 for your charity.

Let's see, is Swan Lake a correct answer?

If it is, how many people said Swan Lake?

Well, it's right. No surprise there.

You have 64.

APPLAUSE

I thought it would be 94.

Unfortunately, not a pointless answer.

-That was just holding a place, you knew that.

-We knew it was silly.

Only two more chances to win today's jackpot.

We were looking for Tchaikovsky operas and ballets.

Let's hope nobody said your next answer, Eugene Onegin.

It has to be correct and it has to be pointless. Let's see if it is right,

and if it is, how many people said Eugene Onegin?

It is right.

It is right, down it goes.

It has already beaten Swan Lake. Still going down.

If this goes down all the way to zero, you leave with £2,500.

Oh!

APPLAUSE

I think that bodes well for the Queen Of Spades.

No, it'll be another one.

The same person who knew Eugene Onegin will know the Queen Of spades.

It's slightly less well-known, but they will. Damn them.

LAUGHTER

I'll deal with them afterwards.

The only reason I know it is because we went on a cruise to Russia once

and we went to see the Queen Of Spades at the Bolshoi.

You're completely wrong about that, but never mind.

LAUGHTER

Perhaps I was with somebody else, I don't know.

LAUGHTER

You have one more chance to win the jackpot.

Everything is now riding on the Queen Of Spades.

We are looking for Tchaikovsky operas and ballets.

You said this was your most confident shot at a pointless answer.

It has to be pointless for you to win that jackpot.

Let's see if it's right, and if it is how many of our 100 people said

Queen Of Spades.

It is right.

Eugene Onegin went all the way down to one and then stopped.

If this goes all the way down to one and beyond,

you'll be taking £2,500 with you...

No!

APPLAUSE

I told you, the same person.

Well, unfortunately you didn't manage to find

that all-important pointless answer,

so I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot of £2,500.

However, as it is a celebrity special we are going to donate £500

to each celebrity pair for their respective charities.

APPLAUSE

-I can't believe one person snookered us.

-We want his name.

LAUGHTER

Richard.

It was two people who snookered you

cos it was a different person each time.

We are now going to kick ourselves when we see what we should have said.

They're all operas. Let's take a look.

-Very well done if you got any of those at home.

-Never heard of them.

I have heard of The Sorceress, but the rest...

Mazeppa was the only one I knew.

Richard, last night did you Vakula The Smith?

LAUGHTER

You know what? You got me finally, I did.

I'll tell you all about it after.

Unfortunately, we have to say goodbye to Neil and Christine.

It's been brilliant having you on the show.

Thank you both so much for playing.

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

So all that remains is for me to say thank you to all our celebrity pairs,

Liz and Anthony, Russell and Carol, Helen and Harriet,

and our finalists Neil and Christine.

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

Join us next time to put more obscure knowledge to the test on Pointless.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me, goodbye.

CHEERING

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd