Episode 31 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed.

Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong, and welcome to Pointless,

the show where the aim of the game is to avoid obvious answers

and find the obscure ones. Let's meet today's players.

APPLAUSE

And couple number one.

Hi, I'm Sarah.

This is my friend Carol. And we're from Cirencester.

Couple number two.

Hi, I'm Danny This is my friend Fareed.

We're from the University of Southampton.

Couple number three.

Hi, I'm Tom. This is my sister Sophie.

And we are from Croydon.

And finally, couple number four.

Hi, my name's Jo.

This is my husband David and we're from Poole.

And these are today's contestants.

APPLAUSE

Thanks very much, all of you.

We'll find out more about you as the show goes along.

So that just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

The most lowbrow thing this man has ever done

is belch the Greek alphabet once.

It's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

Hiya.

APPLAUSE Hi, everybody.

-Good afternoon.

-And to you.

-Lovely show last time.

We've given away the jackpot four times in a row now.

-How about that!

-Four times in a row.

On podium one, we've got Carol and Sarah,

who were very, very strong last time.

They came up against Simon and David, who were in that jackpot round.

Simon and David got the lowest scoring answers.

Literally nothing you could have done.

They are a terrific team so warning to everybody else.

Sophie and Tom, you already know. They got knocked out in Round Two.

We should take some offence, they got knocked out in the round

-Famous Alexanders and Richards.

-I was trying to forget about that.

You would think that maybe it's something you might have

a bit more in-depth knowledge of. But fine.

We won't be repeating that this time.

Carol and Sarah are going to be very difficult to beat.

But we see favourites beaten all the time on this show.

We certainly do. Thanks very much indeed.

Simon and David won the jackpot last time.

Today's jackpot starts off back at £1,000. There it is.

If everyone is ready, let's play Pointless.

APPLAUSE

All you have to remember is that the pair with the highest score

at the end of each round will be eliminated.

Do everything you can to make sure that's not you.

Our first category today is Literature.

It's Literature. Can you decide in your pairs who is going to first,

who's going to go second.

Whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

Authors And Their Best-known Works. Richard?

We are going to show you the names of seven authors

and give you the initials of one of their best known works.

You have to tell us what that work is, please.

-14 in all to have a go at, at home.

-Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

We are looking for the titles of these authors' novels.

They will be shown in initials.

Here is our first board of seven.

I'll read those one last time.

Carol, welcome back. Carol, remind us what you do.

-I'm a freelance book editor.

-A book editor in Cirencester?

-Yeah.

Which is nice because you can work from home.

I do, yes. And it's great.

Are you very good at that? Are you good at making sure you work?

I'm a little bit inclined to go out for coffee if anyone asks me.

-But I'm not too bad.

-That's OK.

-Nice to have that to look forward to.

-Yeah.

Do you favour working in the mornings or the afternoons

if you had a choice?

Um, oh, I'm not great in the mornings so probably...

yeah, early afternoon.

Do you speed read? Do you skim through?

-Yeah, sometimes I have to, yeah.

-Yeah.

Do you ever skip a page?

No! Absolutely not!

That would be against my professional standards.

Even if it was maybe by accident, Carol?

Sometimes you might have just turned two or three at the same time.

Occasionally I may have actually cut the page out.

Put a red line right through it and said, "You're not having that."

-"I can't be bothered to read it."

-Yup.

-Yup.

It can't be good.

So, Carol, this is just a dream round for you, isn't it?

My favourite book is there.

So... It's Stella Gibbons. Cold Comfort Farm.

I was guessing that's the one you were going to say.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, let's see how

many of our 100 people said Cold Comfort Farm.

Look at that, down it goes! 11!

Nothing unpleasant lurking in the woodshed for you.

Cold Comfort Farm.

Carol carrying on with the good work from last time there.

It was her first novel as well.

Thanks very much indeed. Now, Danny, welcome.

-Hello.

-Great to have you here from the University of Southampton.

-Yep.

-What are you studying there, Danny?

I do maths and economics.

What do you like getting up to down in Southampton

when you're not studying?

I'm part of the Comedy Society.

-I'm going to be vice president next year.

-Are you? Good for you!

-Hopefully we'll take something up to Edinburgh.

-Excellent.

Well, actually, it's a sketch and improv show.

It's going to be called Skimprov.

I like what you've done there immediately. Skimprov.

Printing obviously expensive in Southampton.

The troop is called Masters of None. Playing on that...

-Yeah.

-Because we are rubbish at everything.

I'm joking, we are really good.

There we are, brilliant. Danny, time to shine. It's books.

It's books and authors.

There is one that I'm kind of tempted to go for

but it's a massive risk.

I think I'll just go for the obvious one.

-William Golding, Lord Of The Flies.

-Lord Of The Flies, says Danny.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said it.

It's right.

53. High score there, Danny, but a lot lower than 100.

Lord Of The Flies.

It was rejected by more than 20 publishers before it was

-published, Lord Of The Flies.

-Wow!

Goes to show though, never give up.

Well, some people should give up, but some people shouldn't.

Yeah, maybe. Skimprov, don't give up.

-Never!

-No.

-We wouldn't dream of it.

-Good. Glad to hear.

So, Tom, welcome back.

Round Two we had to say goodbye to you last time.

Yeah, unfortunately. But hoping to get a bit further this time.

-Yes, it was Alexanders and Richards.

-Yes, yes.

God, the shame.

Tom, remind us what you do.

I'm also a student at the University of Southampton.

I'm in my second year.

Do you know Danny and Fareed?

No, we met ten minutes ago.

I tell you what,

there is a brilliant club night you should go to. Skimprov.

LAUGHTER

They do...

You know, they're called Masters of None,

which is slightly tongue-in-cheek.

There are some things they can't do but they have breadth.

And I tell you what they do have is persistence.

Yeah, I'll have to check them out.

Yeah, you should. You should. Very good.

Tom, what are you going to go for on this board?

I only knew two of them straight away.

And one of them has been taken out.

I'm going to have to go for Emily Bronte, Wuthering Heights.

Wuthering Heights, says Tom.

Well, let's see how far down the column you get with that.

It's right. 53 is our highest scorer.

Till now. 58 is the new high score. For Wuthering Heights.

Yeah, another book that actually sold very,

very badly when it was first out, Wuthering Heights.

It was absolutely written off.

It just gained more and more popularity as time went by.

A low score that genuinely might be typos,

20 people said Withering Heights.

SNIGGERING

-Wow.

-Yeah.

It's a very different book.

That's a very different book indeed. Thank you, Richard.

Now, Jo, welcome to Pointless. Great to have you here.

-Thank you.

-What do you do, Jo?

I work for a local family fish and chip firm. I do their accounts.

And payroll.

What day of the week are you there? Every day or do you just...?

Every day. Monday to Friday.

And food on the company?

That's fun.

No, I don't get food on the company.

I love chips. Oh! You'd get a bit bored of it after a while.

What do you do in your spare time, Jo?

-Well, a taxi service for my two children.

-Yeah.

Running here, there and everywhere.

I'm very actively involved in our local Catholic church.

So, you know, we go to quite a few things with that.

Very good. OK, Jo, this board is all yours.

-SHE GIGGLES

-Talk us through it if you can.

That was a good laugh.

Talk us through it if you can and fill in any of the blanks.

I'm not sure. I only know one, I think.

And that's Ken Kesey.

I think it might be One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest.

One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, says Jo.

Let's see if that's right and if it is,

let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It's absolutely right. 58 is our high, you've passed that.

11 is our low. Where will you end up?

18! Not bad at all, Jo.

Good answer there.

Well played, Jo.

It's quite a nice, easy board to ease us into this round, isn't it?

-I imagine you can finish these off.

-I can do that.

-Vanity Fair.

-Would have scored...

32. Anthony Burgess?

-A Clockwork Orange.

-A Clockwork Orange.

Would have scored you 17. And Richard Adams?

-Watership Down.

-It's Watership Down. That would have scored 42.

So, Carol, best answer on the board, Cold Comfort Farm.

Thanks very much. Halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at the scores. 11 the best of the pass.

Carol and Sarah setting out their stall once again.

They are on the first podium.

Then up to 18, where we find Jo and David.

53, Danny and Fareed.

And then 58, Tom and Sophie.

Now, Sophie, you know what you have to do here.

Are you comfortable with this as a subject?

I studied English literature at university so I should be all right.

Well, let's hope. Best of luck.

We are going to come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium.

OK, we are going to put seven more authors up on the board

and here they come. We have...

I'll read those all one last time.

There we are. David, welcome to Pointless. What do you do, David?

-I'm a civil servant.

-Can I ask which department of the civil service?

-You certainly may.

-Which department of the civil service?

-The Department for Work and Pensions.

-Very good.

How long have you been there?

-Nearly six years.

-Enjoy it?

I love it. Excellent.

And what do you do when you are not doing that, David?

I read books about quizzes, I think about quizzes

and I perform in quizzes. I love them.

Have you got a team with Jo?

We have in the past.

We used to go to a pub in Poole that overlooked, well,

it's not far from the sea. And we took all their money one night.

Hang on, hang on! Do you mean in a quiz or in a raid?

LAUGHTER DROWNS OUT SPEECH

-No, we won the quiz.

-You won the quiz.

-We did it well.

Wow. OK, David, let's see how you do on this quiz.

That board is a nice, fresh board for you.

What are you going to go for?

I think that... I'll be honest, I know them all.

I don't think many people will get Jack Kerouac, On The Road.

On The Road, says David. There is your red line.

Below this, which is 39 or less, you are in the next round.

On The Road, how many people said that?

It's right.

You are in Round Two. Very well done. On The Road scores 24.

Takes your total up to 42.

Well played, David.

Jack Kerouac's second novel is still incredibly iconic to this day.

Held very dear by a number of people.

Thanks very much indeed. Now, Sophie, welcome back.

-Thank you.

-Welcome back. Now, you are the highest scorers.

You have a task here. You're up to it.

-Now you've seen the board, you're happy with it, good.

-Yes.

-Remind us what you do, Sophie.

-I work in digital marketing.

-Indeed you do. Putting adverts onto search engines.

-Yes.

Presumably that's going to become more and more prominent?

Oh, yeah, definitely.

-Because we can't have that free for ever, I imagine.

-Yeah.

-Sophie, there you are. You are on 58. We need a low score.

-Yes.

Well, I've read pretty much all of them.

I'm going to go for the top one, which I wrote an essay on.

I thought you were going to say, "Which I wrote."

LAUGHTER

Which is The Pilgrim's Progress.

The Pilgrim's Progress, of course, says Sophie.

No red line for you as you are the highest scorers

but let's see how far you get down.

Absolutely right.

35 for The Pilgrim's Progress, taking your total up to 93.

Yeah, he wrote most of the book in Bedford Prison.

It's never been out of print since.

Thanks very much indeed. Now, Fareed, we come to you. Welcome.

-Great to have you. Also from the University of Southampton.

-Yes.

The University of Southampton getting a lot of representation.

-It really is, isn't it?

-Which is good.

We had lots of Alexanders on the show a few back.

-Now a lot of Southampton students.

-Southampton students.

-What are you studying, Fareed?

-Law.

-How's that going?

-Reasonably well.

Which bit of the law do you think you'll go into?

I'd like to go into something intellectual or technology-based.

Intellectual property is the one I've been looking at.

-And you're still in your first year?

-Yes.

You've got time for it all to crystallise between now and then.

Listen, there you are on 53.

The high scorers are Sophie and Tom on a 93.

So 39 or less will get you through to the next round.

Other than Keith Waterhouse, I think I know them.

So it's just a case of which I think can get the lowest score.

I'm going to go with JD Salinger, The Catcher In The Rye.

The Catcher In The Rye, says Fareed. Let's see if that's right.

There is your red line.

It's right.

Well done. Oh, look at that!

38. You needed 39.

Cutting it a bit fine but you did it. 91 is your total.

Well played, Fareed.

That sold over 65 million copies, The Catcher In The Rye.

-Fareed has got a good manner about him, hasn't he?

-He has.

You sense he's going to be a very wealthy lawyer.

Yeah, if I went into a meeting and said, "This is Fareed.

"He will be your lawyer." I would relax.

You'd think, "That's good." And he'd just...

Just like that. Nice and calm.

You could muck about and just have a laugh and stuff.

Fareed's absolutely just playing a straight bat all the way through.

He knew exactly what he needed. 39. He got 38.

Afterwards, you walk out, you look at him, he looks at you. Boom!

High-five!

Whooo... Boom!

-OK, now, Sarah.

-Yes.

-Sarah, welcome back.

I hope there's still lots on that board that you like.

Remind us what you do, Sarah.

I am a student, not at the University of Southampton.

-How bizarre.

-I go to the University of Leicester.

That's some way from Southampton even.

-Yeah, I know. Bit of a distance.

-How did that happen?

-LAUGHING:

-I don't know.

Urgh! OK. And you are studying?

English literature.

There we go. Good.

I'll have loads to say in this round.

Good. Also doing some part-time modelling.

Part-time, kind of full-time sometimes.

-So that fills up your holidays?

-That fills up my life.

Do you think you will keep that going when you finish your degree?

-I hope so, yes.

-Excellent, OK. Now, there you are. You are on 11.

You need to score 81 or less. Talk us through the board.

Mary Shelley - Frankenstein.

I'm not so sure about Keith Waterhouse.

Harper Lee - To Kill A Mockingbird.

Jonathan Swift - Gulliver's Travels.

I think I'm going to go for Jonathan Swift, Gulliver's Travels.

OK, well, you have to score 81 or less.

Let's see how far down the column you get with Gulliver's Travels.

There is your red line. How many people said Gulliver's Travels?

It's right. And you're through.

Not bad. 46 for Gulliver's Travels.

57 your total.

Well played, Sarah. You chose the right one of the ones you knew.

The others would have scored you a bit more.

Mary Shelley, Frankenstein is actually the highest scorer of all.

It would have scored you 66.

To Kill A Mockingbird would have scored you 45.

This last one, a couple of you said you wouldn't have gone for it.

I think you've read most of the books.

You'd love it, it's a terrific book.

-David, have you read the Keith Waterhouse one?

-Oh, yeah.

-And it's?

-Billy Liar.

-Billy Liar, yes. It's a terrific book.

You'd love it. It would have scored you 11 points.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

At the end of the first round, the pair who are heading home

with their high score of 93, I'm so sorry, Sophie and Tom, it's you.

It was Round Two last time, Sophie and Tom. Round One this time.

I'm sorry. Far too soon to be saying goodbye,

but it's been great having you on.

Thank you so much for playing. Sophie and Tom.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs it's now time for Round Two.

And so, three pairs remain.

Very sadly, at the end of this round

we'll have to say goodbye to another pair.

I've got various plaudits to hand out after that round.

Well done to Carol for our lowest individual score.

Well done to Jo and David for our lowest team score.

And Danny and Fareed, just well done.

-LAUGHTER

-Thank you.

Anyway, best of luck to all three pairs.

Our category for Round Two is...

Actors And Actresses.

Can you all decide in your pairs who is going to go first and second.

Whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

In a moment, we are going to show you the names of four actors.

We need you to tell us

the name of any feature film made for cinema release

for which they received an acting credit for a film that

was released in the UK or US during the noughties please.

According to IMDb, any film for which the following received

an acting credit for a film released in the noughties.

As Richard has just said, we are going to put four actors' names

on the board and we just need the name of any film

released during the noughties starring one of these people. Here is our list of four.

Now, Sarah.

Over to you.

OK, um...

I do watch a lot of films so this isn't too bad a round for me.

I'm just kind of thinking through what I think might be a good answer.

I think I'm going to go with...

..a Cameron Diaz film. I'm going to say The Mask.

The Mask, says Sarah. The Mask.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

The Mask.

Oh, sorry.

The Mask has scored you 100 points. We will discover why in a second.

It is Cameron Diaz but it's 1994, I'm afraid.

So a long time before the noughties.

Ah, yes, the noughties. Fareed.

Obviously I'd like to think I've heard of them.

The problem I am having is firstly, whether it's in the noughties.

And secondly, whether they actually won an acting credit for it.

I'm going to go with Matt Damon, Invictus.

Invictus. Let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 said Invictus.

It's right. Good answer, Fareed.

Still going down.

It's a pointless answer!

That is a brilliant answer, Fareed.

That adds £250 to today's jackpot. Takes the total up to £1,250.

It scores you nothing. Earns you our endless respect.

And that's it. Very well done indeed, Fareed.

-Thank you very much.

-Fabulous answer there.

-Well played, Fareed.

Again, using your lawyerly skill, I slipped a little sub-clause,

I don't know if you noticed, into the introduction.

I said anything that was released in the US or the UK in the noughties.

Invictus was released in the UK in 2010.

-But it was released in the US in 2009.

-Look at that!

-There you go.

-Look at that!

And Fareed knew that. He knew that.

He needed 39, he got 38. He just...

Oh, he sails close to the wind.

How do you do it, Fareed?

Now, Jo.

Jo, what are you going to go for?

I don't know.

LAUGHTER

Um...

I think I'll go...

Cameron Diaz...

And Shrek.

Shrek, says Jo.

Let's see if that's right, let's see how many people said Shrek.

It's right.

Our only correct answer so far has scored nothing.

Shrek is scoring you 15.

Closer to the nothing end of the spectrum, you'll be glad to hear.

Very well done.

Well played, Jo. She plays Princess Fiona, of course.

Thanks very much. We are halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at those scores. Fareed and Danny, well done.

There you are, looking very strong at this point with a fabulous low

score of nothing. Then up to 15, where we find Jo and David.

Then up to 100, Sarah and Carol. I'm so sorry.

The Mask an expensive error there.

But who knows what will happen in the next pass, Carol.

A low score from you might keep you in the game.

We are going to come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium.

OK, so, David, remember we are looking for any film

released in the noughties starring any one of these four actors.

Um...

I think Angelina Jolie was in a film with a good-looking man

and they were hit men and women.

-Mr And Mrs Smith.

-Mr And Mrs Smith, says David.

There is your red line.

Let's see how many people said Mr And Mrs Smith.

It's right. Through you go.

28.

Taking your total up to 43.

Well played, David, yeah. Starred alongside Brad Pitt.

Thank you very much indeed. Danny.

-Yes.

-Danny, look at this.

-It's good.

A score of nothing from Fareed. Now, 100 is the highest score.

99 or less sees you comfortably through.

-HE EXHALES

-OK.

The pressure is on me to get 98 now, isn't it?

-LAUGHTER

-Or another pointless.

Yeah, that would be good. That would be.

I'm going to go with one.

I don't know if it's '90s or noughties,

but it's one of my favourite films, so I'm going to go with it.

Cameron Diaz was in Gangs Of New York.

Gangs Of New York, says Danny.

OK, here is your red line. Nice and high.

Get below that, you are in the next round.

Let's see how many people said Gangs Of New York.

It's right.

Are you going to equal Fareed's brilliant performance

in the first pass? Down it goes. Still going down.

-1!

-APPLAUSE

That's good! Once again, you're shading it.

He'll never let that slide.

You are shading it. 1. Your total is 1. Very well done indeed, Danny.

Very well played. She plays Jenny Everdeane in that.

Again, that's Fareed saying, "You can do well, mate, but don't..."

LAUGHTER

"We know who the star is here. Fill your boots. Get 1 if you wish.

-"But I'll do the pointless answers here."

-Yeah.

Thanks very much indeed. Now, Carol, I'm so sorry.

I'm afraid the writing is on the wall.

Even before you've given your answer, you are the highest scorers.

-Yes.

-Do you want to talk us through your thoughts?

I'm not very good at films.

I love films but I can never remember who was in them.

And I don't know when they came out. But I've got a couple.

-Shall I give you a thought?

-Yeah, why not?

How about...

Cameron Diaz, There's Something About Mary.

There's Something About Mary.

No red line for you as the highest scorers.

Let's see how many people said There's Something About Mary.

Oh, no!

I'm guessing that's fallen into the same trap as The Mask.

It scores you 100 points. Takes your total up to 200.

Yeah, you are edging closer to the noughties. That was 1998, I'm afraid.

-Oh!

-There's plenty of pointless answers. There's loads of them.

Let's take a look at a few of them.

First two there are both Christian Bale.

3:10 To Yuma, that's a good film.

Captain Corelli's Mandolin he is also in.

Confessions Of A Dangerous Mind, that's Matt Damon.

My Sister's Keeper, that is Cameron Diaz.

Christian Bale was in Shaft.

The Bone Collector, that's Angelina Jolie.

Matt Damon in The Legend Of Bagger Vance.

These last two both Cameron Diaz.

Vanilla Sky and What Happens In Vegas.

Thanks very much indeed. At the end of our second round,

the pair heading home with the high score of 200, Carol and Sarah.

You were our low scorers last time,

right the way up through to the head-to-head.

This is far too soon to be saying goodbye to you.

But thanks very much indeed for playing.

It's been lovely having you on both shows. Carol and Sarah.

APPLAUSE

For the remaining two pairs, it's now time for the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Jo and David, Danny and Fareed.

You are now one step closer to the final and

a chance to play for our jackpot, which currently stands at £1,250.

Well, you have seen off our two returning pairs.

On your first appearance on Pointless,

you're straight through to the head-to-head.

We've had some brilliant answers from each of you.

Notably Fareed with that pointless answer. Fantastic work.

But great low answers as well from Jo and David.

I think now you put your heads together,

this is going to be incredibly well matched. Best of luck to both pairs.

Let's play the head-to-head.

OK, here comes your first question and it concerns...

-JO:

-Oh, no!

-Britpop Bands.

-LAUGHTER

-Richard.

-Going to show you five pictures now of bands associated with

the Britpop era. Can you tell us the most obscure of these, please?

Thanks very much indeed. Let's reveal our five Britpop bands.

And here they come. We have got...

There we go. Five Britpop bands.

Jo and David, you've been our lowest scorers so far

so you will go first.

Right, what do you reckon?

(Do you know any of them?)

MUFFLED SPEECH

Yeah?

-OK.

-Yeah?

-Yeah.

Um, C.

We will go for Blur.

Blur, say Jo and David. C - Blur.

Now, Danny and Fareed, the board is all yours. Talk us through it.

Um...

I only know one of the other ones. Fareed said he didn't know any.

No help here. I'm too busy in the office.

LAUGHTER

He doesn't have time for this teenage ruckus that is Britpop.

I'm going to say B is Pulp.

B - Pulp.

We have C - Blur, B - Pulp.

Jo and David said Blur. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many people said Blur.

It's right.

47 for Blur.

Danny and Fareed, meanwhile, have gone for Pulp.

Let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 said Pulp.

It's absolutely right.

And it wins you the point. Well done.

Going down to...24.

Well done, Danny and Fareed. After one question, you are up one-nil.

Yeah, well played, Danny.

Well played for making it look like you came up with the answer

when we know who was pulling the strings there.

Very impressive, Fareed. Well done. LAUGHTER

A is the best answer up there. Sleeper.

The lovely Louise Wener there at the front.

It would have scored 6 points.

D is Supergrass. The wonderful Supergrass.

That would have scored 23.

If you don't know Supergrass, if you are too young to know Supergrass,

who in the world is not going to like Supergrass?

One of my favourite bands of the '90s. Just fabulous.

And E is a big scorer because, of course, that is Oasis.

It would have scored you 80 points.

Thanks very much. Here comes your second question.

Jo and David, you have to win this one to stay in the game.

So best of luck. It concerns...

Oh, goodness me!

The Great North Run. Richard?

Just one of these days, it's an ambition of mine, I would love to

have a category where as soon as you revealed it Jo didn't say,

"Oh, no, you're kidding me."

It would be lovely to find what that would be.

We are going to show you five clues to facts about the Great North Run.

Can you give us the most obscure answer?

Thanks very much indeed. Let's reveal our five clues.

And here they come. We have...

I'll read those one last time.

There we are.

Five clues to facts about the Great North Run.

Danny and Fareed will go first.

INAUDIBLE SPEECH

-We don't know any of them.

-THEY LAUGH

And we are just thinking which one to guess.

Should we just guess the footballer who was England captain?

We are just going to guess. David Beckham.

David Beckham, say Danny and Fareed. David Beckham.

Now, Jo and David. The board is all yours.

Talk us through it.

-Olympic bronze medallist was Brendan Foster.

-We think.

-We think.

Allegedly, Liz McColgan in '92, '95 and '96.

Mo Farah, I think, was something like 13th or 14th.

It's a half marathon

and you've cheekily asked the distance to the nearest mile.

-I don't know whether that's...

-13.

-..13 or 14.

So I'll go for...

-Olympic bronze medal...

-The Olympic bronze medallist

and BBC commentator who founded the race, I think it's...

-Brendan Foster.

-..Brendan Foster.

Brendan Foster, say Jo and David.

So we have David Beckham and Brendan Foster.

Danny and Fareed said David Beckham. Let's see if that's right.

Nope. I'm afraid an incorrect answer there.

Which means, Jo and David, you merely have to be correct with

Brendan Foster and you will win the point.

Let's see if it's right.

-It is right.

-Well done!

Nice low score, 19, as well.

Crucially, it was right. Jo and David, you are back in the game.

Welcome back. After two questions it's one-all.

Well played, David. Very nicely done.

You were right about Liz McColgan as well.

Would have been a slightly better scorer. Would have scored you 15.

Mo Farah in 2013, it was won by Kenenisa Bekele but he came second.

Second place. Biggest scorer on the board actually. 34.

The footballer. Well, it was first in 1981, the Great North Run.

It doesn't seem like it's been around that long. Does it?

And it was Kevin Keegan. It would have scored you 4.

This answer is the one where David turned into Fareed very briefly.

LAUGHTER

If you were forced, David?

-I'd have said...

-13.

-..14.

-Would you?

It's 13 and only a little bit so it's 13 miles.

Jo would have told me it was 13 and we would have answered 13.

That would have scored you 24. Kevin Keegan the best answer there.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

Here comes your third and final question.

Whoever wins this goes through to the final.

Best of luck to both pairs. It concerns...

JO SCOFFS

-Nursery Rhymes.

-I'm not saying anything.

-Richard.

You did go "Ugh!" which is much the same, isn't it?

I'm just not going to say anything.

We are going to show you the names of five nursery rhymes

but we are only showing you certain letters.

Can you fill in the gaps and tell us what they are, please?

Very, very best of luck.

OK, let's reveal our five nursery rhymes. And here they come.

We've got...

I'll read those again. Slightly better.

Phew! There we go!

Five nursery rhymes. Jo and David, you'll go first this time.

Um...

We definitely know two, don't we?

-We definitely know three.

-Three.

-I want to go for the fourth one.

-I don't.

-OK, the third one.

We will go for the third one.

London Bridge Is Falling Down.

London Bridge Is Falling Down, say Jo and David.

So, Danny and Fareed, the board is all yours. Talk us through it.

We still sing each other nursery rhymes before we go to bed.

We think we know all of them.

Should I just read out all the ones that I think...?

-Yes, why not.

-The top one is Old MacDonald Had A Farm.

Georgie Porgie.

London Bridge Is Falling Down, obviously.

Sing A Song Of Sixpence.

And Little Miss Muffet.

We'll go with Sing A Song Of Sixpence, please.

OK, Sing A Song Of Sixpence, say Danny and Fareed.

We have Jo and David saying London Bridge Is Falling Down.

Let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many people said that.

It's right.

68 for London Bridge Is Falling Down. Well done.

At least you get to go on again.

Danny and Fareed, meanwhile, have gone for Sing A Song Of Sixpence.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many people said that.

It's right. It's got to beat 68.

Oh, 70!

Wow!

I said it would be close. I didn't know it was going to be that close.

Very well done indeed, Jo and David.

After three questions, you are through to the final. 2-1.

Both big scorers there.

You could've been through to the final if you'd chosen the right one.

I am assuming Fareed has a plan.

Coming back the next show and winning more money is what he's thinking.

Old MacDonald Had A Farm was actually the biggest scorer up there.

It would have scored you 78.

But, by a mile, Georgie Porgie is the best scorer on the board.

I was going to go for that one.

This is going to be my fault.

It would have scored you 43.

And Little Miss Muffet down the bottom there

would have scored you 59.

-How about that? That was exciting.

-Very exciting, you're right.

I said it was going to go down to the wire

but I really didn't know it was going to be that close.

Danny and Fareed, you will be leaving us at the end of this round

but very, very well played.

We can expect great things the next time we see you.

Great to have you back next time as well.

Otherwise it would all have been just over in one show.

We all look forward to that very much indeed. Danny and Fareed.

APPLAUSE

But for Jo and David, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Jo and David. You've seen off all the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show the jackpot stands at £1,250.

You've done very, very well indeed.

We've thrown all sorts of things at you. We started off with literature.

Then we had films. Then we had Britpop.

Then we had the Great North Run. Then we had nursery rhymes.

-And Jo has hated all of them.

-SHE LAUGHS

Jo, your turn to tell us what you'd actually like to see.

What would be great for you, Jo?

I really like sport, but from the, sort of, 1990s.

And soap. I used to watch a lot of soaps, like '80s and '90s.

I don't now.

OK, so quite niche then. '90s sport, 1980s soap operas...

Currencies, foreign currencies.

Because that's what we both used to do.

As always, you have to choose your category from the four we give you.

Let's see if there is anything up here you like the look of.

Let's hope soap operas from the '80s or sport from the '90s is up there.

We've got...

-It's gonna be from Doctor Who...

-Sorry!

Doctor Who and Classical Mythology In The Movies. What do you think?

Because that would be something like the one with the owl that

flies around, you know, The Clash Of The Titans.

They might say name characters in Clash Of The Titans

-or Percy Jackson.

-You'd be on your own.

-All right.

-You'd be on your own in all of them, actually.

-Doctor Who? No? So I'm going to be on my own in all of them.

-Yeah.

You're going to help me.

You've watched classical mythology films and Doctor Who,

what do you think?

You know all about Doctor Who.

No, I don't. Um...

Classical Mythology In The Movies.

Classical Mythology In The Movies, Richard.

You've got three questions here.

One of them will look very familiar to you. Let's take a look.

We are looking for any named character in the 2004 movie Troy.

We are looking for any named character in the 1997 movie Hercules.

Or we are looking for any named character in the 1981 or

the 2010 versions of Clash Of The Titans.

According to IMDb, any named character in any of those films.

Thanks very much indeed. As always, you've got up to one minute

to come up with three answers. All you need to win the jackpot

is for just one of those to be pointless. Are you ready?

BOTH: Yes.

OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock. There they are.

Your time starts now.

Menelaus from the Troy one. I think.

-Clash Of The Titans would be Zeus.

-That's going to be a big one.

Yes, a big, obvious one.

Hercules...

No, let's not do Hercules.

Do more from Clash Of The Titans.

My mind's gone blank.

-Athena.

-Mmm.

Zeus, Athena and Menelaus.

I think Menelaus was in Troy.

Helen of Troy. I think she... I can't remember!

Think of some more from Clash Of The Titans.

Perseus. No...

My mind has gone blank. The old one is... Who did...?

Rocky's mentor play?

-LAUGHING:

-This is killing me!

-I don't know.

-Ten seconds left.

So...

I've gone blank.

Right...

Menelaus...

OK. That's your time up. I now need your three answers.

What are you going to give me?

-From The Clash Of The Titans...

-Yes.

-I think Athena.

-Athena.

-From Troy, I think Menelaus.

-Menelaus.

-And from The Clash Of The Titans, Odysseus.

-Odysseus.

OK. Of the three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer,

do you think?

-Athena, I think.

-OK, Athena we will put last. Least likely?

-Menelaus.

-Menelaus and Odysseus in the middle.

Let's put those answers on the board in that order then.

And here they are. We have got Menelaus, Odysseus and Athena.

Best of luck. Three good answers on the board.

Remember, only one of these have to be pointless for you to win

the jackpot of 1,250 quid.

What would you do with it if you won, Jo?

We've got the two most beautiful girls

so we would just do lots of lovely family things with them.

Wonderful. Best of luck.

Let's hope one of these answers wins that jackpot.

Your first was Menelaus,

the one you thought was the least likely to be pointless.

In this case, we were looking for characters in Troy.

Let's see if it's right

and how many of our 100 people said Menelaus.

For £1,250.

It's right. That was the first thing it had to be.

Now, if Menelaus goes all the way down to zero

then you will leave here with £1,250.

Down it goes through the twenties. Through the teens.

Into single figures. Still going down, down, down.

-You've done it!

-CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Fantastic!

Wow!

-Menelaus.

-Thank you so much!

You've done it. Superb.

THEY TALK EXCITEDLY

There we go.

Congratulations.

Menelaus was a pointless answer,

which means you go straight home with that jackpot of £1,250.

Brilliant!

APPLAUSE

Fareed is going to be furious. That was his money.

You've taken his money.

Lucky that was a pointless answer because the other two weren't.

Odysseus not in Clash Of The Titans.

In Troy, he would have scored you 1 point.

-Athena would have scored you 1 point as well.

-Oh-ho!

Menelaus doing a lot of good there.

The Burgess Meredith character you're thinking of, Rocky's mentor,

was Ammon. It would have been a pointless answer

for Clash Of The Titans. Let's take a look at Troy.

Andromache is a pointless answer.

Lysander, Nestor and Thetis also pointless answers.

Well done if you said any of those.

Let's take a look at Hercules.

You could've had Atropos, Calliope, you could have had Pain.

You could've had Panic. There are a few others for that one.

You could've had Clio, Clotho, Nessus.

Thalia also a pointless answer.

And Clash Of The Titans.

You could have had Aphrodite, Calibos, Hera, Io.

You also could have had Ammon, as I say.

You could've had Belo, you could've had Draco...

I wish I hadn't started this.

You could've had Hermes as well. Lots of pointless answers in that one.

Congratulations on Menelaus. A terrific answer.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

Thanks once again to our winning players, Jo and David,

who go away with today's jackpot of £1,250.

-Very well done indeed.

-APPLAUSE

Join us next time when we'll put more obscure knowledge to the test

-on Pointless. Meanwhile, it is goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.