Episode 32 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed.

Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong, and welcome to Pointless,

the show where the aim of the game is to find the most obscure answer possible.

Let's meet today's players.

APPLAUSE

And couple number one.

Hello, my name's Sue and this is my husband, Ian,

and we're from Leicestershire.

Couple number two.

Hi, I'm Fareed, this is Danny,

and we're housemates at the University of Southampton.

Couple number three.

Hi, I'm Jenny, this is my fiance, Richard, and we're from Watford.

And, finally, couple number four.

Hello, I'm Gayle from Oswaldtwistle

and this is my friend, Sarah, from Blackburn.

And these are today's contestants.

APPLAUSE

Thanks to all of you. We'll find out more about you

throughout the show as it goes along.

That just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

A haggard mountain Sherpa leading us up the dangerous way

to the peak of Mount Wow.

-It's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

-Hiya.

APPLAUSE Afternoon, everybody.

-How are you?

-I'm very well indeed.

-Excellent.

-Now, we set a new record on the last show.

-Did we?

Five jackpot wins in a row.

Five jackpot wins in a row, never done it before.

Obviously, we've never done six,

so some pressure on today, but five in a row.

David and Jo took home the jackpot last time.

They beat Danny and Fareed, who were terrific.

They played so well, played so well throughout.

We discovered that Fareed is going to be the world's greatest lawyer.

He's a law student. He's got just such a...forensic manner.

-He has.

-You'll see. He's quite something.

But they got knocked out in the head-to-head

by two points on the last question.

It was terrific stuff but then David and Jo, yeah,

went on to win that money. Should be a good show today.

The first question today, we've done one round like this before

-and we enjoyed it so much I decided to do another one.

-Oh, what fun.

And, can I just say, is this the first time we've ever had

someone from Oswaldtwistle on the show?

-Oswaldtwistle?

-Yeah.

-I think it is, isn't it?

-I want to get to the root of Oswaldtwistle.

Why is that T still in there? Oswaldwistle would have done it.

-No, Oswaldtwistle sounds much better.

-Oswaldtwistle is better.

We're going to be talking about Oswaldtwistle a lot, I suspect.

You bet we are. You bet! Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

Now, Jo and David, as you'll have gathered,

won the jackpot last time so today's jackpot starts off back at £1,000.

There we are. If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

APPLAUSE

Now, the pair with the highest score at the end of each round

will be eliminated. That's the rule.

That's the only thing you need to remember. Best of luck.

Our first category today -

Sport. Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second.

And, whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK. And the question concerns -

Sporting figures in haiku. There we are. Richard.

That's right, on each board we're going to describe

seven sporting figures to you,

but we're describing them in the form of a Japanese haiku.

That's a poem of five syllables, seven syllables, then five syllables.

You have to tell us who they are.

There's going to be 14 haikus in all to enjoy at home

and 14 sporting figures to guess.

-I tell you what else, it's going to be...enormous fun.

-Oh!

It's going to be terrific. It's also going to be very, very cultural.

-Yes, cultural. And challenging.

-Challenging, cultural.

-There's going to be a lot of cardio involved.

-Very good.

Well, let's reveal our haikus.

I'm not going to wait any longer, don't know about you. Here they are.

Seven of them.

I'll read those all again, slightly quicker.

-Sue, a warm welcome to Pointless.

-Thank you.

That face you're pulling tells me

you are delighted with this round, which is good. What do you do, Sue?

I'm happily retired now, thank you.

What were you doing when you were unhappily in work?

-I was a sub-postmistress.

-A sub-postmistress?

-Yes.

-In your village?

-Ian and I owned the Post Office in Quorn.

Now, if I were you, I'd imagine you'd rather miss that, don't you?

-Yes, I do.

-I mean, nice, you get all the...

I mean... But you're the hub of all the gossip, of course.

-Afraid so, yeah.

-Everything going on in Quorn, oh-ho!

-I could write a bestseller.

-You could write a haiku, I bet.

LAUGHTER

What have you done since you pulled down the postal shutter for the last time?

Not a lot. I enjoy gardening, that's my hobby.

I've got three dogs, I enjoy walking them.

Have to keep Ian in order

-and that tends to be quite a full-time job, really.

-I see.

-OK, now, Sue, there you are.

-OK.

Well, sport is not my subject at all.

There's a couple I might know

but one that I only really know is right,

and that's the Tour de France winner, which is Bradley Wiggins.

Bradley Wiggins, Sir Bradley Wiggins, says Sue.

-Sorry!

-Let's see how many of our 100 people said Bradley Wiggins.

It's absolutely right.

-55.

-APPLAUSE

Not bad, gets us off to a good start, there, Sue. Well done.

Yeah, he's got seven Olympic medals to his name, Bradley Wiggins.

The Dutch call him the banana with the sideburns.

-Catchy.

-Yeah, it is good, isn't it?

-The banana?! Why?

-Oh, in the yellow jumper.

-Yeah. Yellow jumper, yeah.

-Yellow jodhpur?

-Yellow jersey.

-Yellow jersey, sorry. That's right. Yellow jersey.

-As you see, I'm au fait with the sport.

-Oh, yeah.

Good, thanks very much indeed.

-So, now, Danny, welcome back.

-Hello.

Oh, head-to-head last time,

what a performance we had from the Danny-Fareed team.

-Remind us what you do, Danny.

-I'm a student.

I study maths and economics at the University of Southampton.

And what are your other hobbies, Danny?

I'm a comedian. In a...

No, I'm part of the Comedy Society at the University of Southampton.

Excellent, already, in your first year, you've become a leading

-light of the Comedy Society.

-I'm vice president next year.

That's exciting. So, what do you do, do you put on stand-up shows,

do you put on shows throughout the term?

Yeah, we put on shows throughout the term. I've done...

I've only really done a couple of stand-up shows, myself,

but we write sketches, we perform sketches in sketch shows.

We do quite a lot of improv games, as well.

Excellent. Very good, indeed. Well, Danny, what about these haikus?

-I am rubbish at haikus.

-That's OK, what about sport?

-I am rubbish at sport.

-OK, what do you think about this board?

The only one I knew has gone.

So, I'm going to try another one.

My family are Scottish so they're probably going to shout at me

cos I don't even think this person's Scottish. I've no idea.

But the Scottish golfer,

Rory McIlroy.

LAUGHTER

Rory McIlroy, the Scottish golfer. Famous...

Famous bunker shot. Well.

Let see if Rory McIlroy is right.

-No, I'm sorry.

-Are you sure?

-I'm sorry, I'm afraid...

Yeah, I am sure, that's an incorrect answer,

-scores you 100 points.

-Yeah, not Scottish,

not the first Briton to win the Masters.

He is a golfer. He's got "Mc" in his name, so...

He's some of the way there.

He is some of the way there, quite.

-Thank you very much indeed. Now, Richard, welcome.

-Hi.

-Congratulations. You're here with your fiancee.

-I am.

I mean, for being here, but congratulations on being engaged.

-How nice. When are you getting married?

-Next June.

-Fabulous. How long have you been engaged for?

-Um, six months.

-Right, so quite a long engagement.

-Yeah.

-Quite a long...

I'm sorry, I'm not saying anything.

I'm just saying it's quite a long engagement, Richard.

-Now, what do you do?

-I work in IT.

I'm a support engineer for a retail company.

-And what are your hobbies, Richard?

-I'm a keen golfer.

-I think I'm down to 19 at the moment.

-Excellent.

Hopefully, down further in the summer.

Love playing football, watching football. Sport.

-Movies, like to watch movies.

-Are you a fan of wee Jock McIlroy?

LAUGHTER

A favourite of yours?

OK, then, Richard.

What are you going to go for from our board o' haikus?

Well, when it said haikus I was a bit nervous,

but the board's a bit better than I thought. I know a few.

I can take a punt on one.

But I'm going to play it reasonably safe, I think,

and go with the world heavyweight champ, first pro to beat Ali,

smokin' in the ring, is Joe Frazier.

Joe Frazier, says Richard. Let's see if that's right,

let's see how many people said Joe Frazier.

It's right.

10, look at that.

It's all moving in the right direction,

lovely low score, there.

10 for Joe Frazier.

Here's a little haiku.

Congratulations If you got that one at home

It scored you ten points.

Lovely. Look at that, look at that.

APPLAUSE

Weaving gold before our eyes, there.

Gayle, welcome to Pointless, lovely to have you here.

What you do, Gayle?

-I run an arts centre in Oswaldtwistle.

-In Oswaldtwistle?

-Yes.

-Oswalt...

Do you favour Oswaldtwistle when you say it or do you just

go for Oswaldwistle, where the T is just sort of hidden?

-Oswaldtwistle.

-Oswaldtwistle, got to keep the twistle,

got to keep the twistle in there.

-And what happens in the arts centre?

-Lots of singing, dancing, drama.

-And do you partake in all of those?

-Sometimes, yes. When I can.

-Very good. When you're not managing the sessions.

-I run the sessions.

And what are your hobbies, aside from singing, dancing, drama?

I play Scrabble, a lot.

I don't have a lot of spare time so, when I do, I play Scrabble.

In the giddy melange of Oswaldtwistle, it's all go.

-It is.

-Very good.

Well, this will help you out, as you know, a lot of anagrams

and things like that in Pointless.

Obviously not here, we're on haikus

but you're the last person to have that board.

Do you fancy just talking us through it?

-Oh, they're all guesses.

-That's good, good enough.

I think the gymnast would be, probably, Olga Korbut

cos that's about that time.

New Zealand winger, maybe, Jonah Lom...

Jonah Lomu... I don't know.

And I think the Moscow swimmer, the breaststroke, is Duncan Goodhew,

so that's the one that I'm most sure of.

You're going for Duncan Goodhew?

Let's see if that's right, let's see how many people said Duncan Goodhew.

It's absolutely right.

55, our high correct answer - you've passed that.

-APPLAUSE

-32, very good, well done.

32 for Duncan Goodhew.

Well done, Gayle, I think you were right to go for a safer one,

given there's 100 points on the board.

But of the two you mentioned, Olga Korbut would have scored you 100

-cos it's Nadia Comaneci.

-I didn't...

-Yeah, would have scored you...

..13 points.

Jonah Lomu, however, would have been a terrific answer,

would have scored you 8 points. But not worth the risk.

The female snowboarder was the wonderful Jenny Jones.

She would have scored you 7,

and the best answer on the board

is the Scottish golfer and it's Sandy Lyle.

Sandy Lyle is the answer there, 4 points.

Thank you, Richard. We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at those scores. 10, the best score of that pass,

Richard, well done. Putting you and Jenny

in a very strong position. Then up to 32, Gayle and Sarah.

55, Sue and Ian.

And then Danny and Fareed, our returning pair, up there on 100.

Oh, dear. Now, Fareed, you know what we need from you.

A lovely low score. Best of luck with that.

We're going to come back down the line,

can the second players please step up to the podium.

OK, well, let's put seven more haikus up on the board

and here they come.

I'll read those one last time.

-Sarah, welcome. Great to have you here.

-Hello.

-And what do you do, Sarah?

-I'm retired.

-What DID you do, Sarah?

I worked in a sixth form college in Blackburn.

-Teaching or...?

-Yes.

-Teaching, mainly. Bit of management later.

-Right you are.

And what do you do in your retirement, Sarah?

I travel, I do crosswords, I go to the gym, I'm learning Italian.

Good stuff.

OK, listen, you're there on 32, the high-scorers are Fareed

and Danny on 100.

67 or less is what you require.

I'm going to go for the great F1 driver.

-And I'm going to go from Nigel Mansell.

-Nigel Mansell, says Sarah.

Here comes your red lines. Can I tell you something interesting?

The technology has just changed like that, as it will.

As of the last show, I've noticed that our red line, when it comes in,

it used to work its way up from the bottom and now it just appears.

-No, way.

-Yeah, listen, it's just happened.

-Are you kidding me?

I should have brought it up then.

But I was so excited about the potential fifth consecutive jackpot win...

I meant to say cos I keep getting that thing,

"Do you want to update the column?" I always go, "No, I can't be bothered."

"Later, remind me later." Yeah.

And I actually said I would, and that's why...

Then it took about 14 hours and that's the... That's nice.

Well, it's coming on... I keep waiting for it to come up

like it used to in days of yore.

I'm going to say it's given us improved functionality.

-I'm going to say that, as well.

-And increased security features.

Certainly has.

I'm terrible cos I keep forgetting the password.

Well, the security question, I keep getting them wrong.

So, I have to come up with a new one.

I can't even remember what my favourite subject at school was.

See, cos I originally...

-It was originally Central African Republic was the password!

-Yeah.

-That's how the Latvians got in.

-But then that was too many characters, so then it was

"Central African Repub" and then you had to have characters AND numbers.

-Yeah.

-So, it was "Central African Repub19" - a prime number...

and now I've forgotten what it is.

Because now you've got to have capitals in it as well.

So, it's got to be capitals as well. So, now I've got

"Central African Repub19...

-"..Ouagadougou." LAUGHTER

-Ah, well...

Let's hope that is enough of a firewall to keep us absolutely clean.

Although, now I've just said it!

LAUGHTER

I don't think anyone was listening. It's fine.

Erm, OK, so... Nigel Mansell.

There's your red line. Ah, feels like nearly a year ago, that!

Let's see how far down the column you can get with Nigel Mansell.

Will you get below the red line and into the next round?

It is right.

And you are through. Very well done indeed.

36 for Nigel Mansell.

46 is your total.

Yeah, very well played. 31 Grand Prix wins in all for Nigel Mansell.

He had to wait till his 13th season before he became world champion.

-That's patient.

-He is patient. Although, incredibly fast as well.

-So, it's a mixture. A good mix.

-Yeah. Good. Thank you very much indeed.

-Now, Jenny.

-Hello!

-Welcome. Great to have you here.

-What do you do, Jenny?

-I'm an IT test analyst for a retail company.

-Do you work in the same place?

-I work... I sit behind him.

-Yeah.

I see. So, how long have you known him?

Erm, about six years now.

And how long had you known him before you started going out?

-About a year or so, maybe.

-And did you like him from the word go?

Eh...

-Yeah!

-Talk amongst yourselves. Richard - talk amongst yourselves!

No, I did. I thought he was really, really nice. I thought he was really friendly.

He always took the mickey out of my northern accent.

-Let's hear your accent, Richard.

-A'right, luv?

-LAUGHTER

-Put up, put on...

-It is endearing, isn't it?

It is, it's very endearing. Very endearing indeed. And what are your hobbies, Jenny?

Erm, like cinema. I love going to the theatre.

I enjoy singing.

Just loads of different things. I enjoy, erm, some sport - I enjoy football.

I don't enjoy all sport, like Richard does.

OK, are you enjoying this round?

-Erm, the one I was actually going to go for has just gone.

-OK.

So, I am going to go for...

The Jamaican sprinter, Usain Bolt.

Usain Bolt. OK, there's your red line.

You want to be scoring 89 or less. That's what it looks like.

Let's see how many people said Usain Bolt.

It's right and you're through.

54. That's a high one there.

54, taking your total up to 64.

Well played, Jenny. Yeah, Usain Bolt.

He's just taken sprinting into a whole new dimension.

The records he's broken, the way he does it. An extraordinary athlete.

Mm. Thank you very much indeed, Richard. Now, Fareed.

Anything might happen. The game is not yet over for you.

But what we absolutely need from you is a low, low score.

I'm not sure I can deliver.

OK, well, before that, Fareed, remind us of what you do.

Obviously, we know that you're studying to be a lawyer.

Yeah, I'm a law student at the University of Southampton.

Law student exceptionnel! Yes!

And, so, in your spare time, what do you like to do, Fareed?

I like acting and I like hockey.

OK, have you done lots of student productions while at university?

I've done a couple at university but mostly back at school.

Erm, obviously I have to focus on my law work - in order to be the best!

You've got to focus on your law work, you know. Exactly. Exactly.

Well, there you are. The high scorer on 100.

What are you going to go for on this board?

I think sport was the round we were worried about, actually.

You know, Usain Bolt was probably the only answer I could give.

So, I'm going to name a basketballer.

And I'm going to go with Michael Jordan.

Michael Jordan, says Fareed.

No red line for you, I'm afraid, as you are the high scorers.

But let's see how far down the column you can get with Michael Jordan. Is it right?

Ooh! I'm sorry, Fareed!

An incorrect answer there, scoring you 100 points,

-taking you up to 200.

-Sorry, Fareed.

It was actually Rory McIlroy.

LAUGHTER

-That's gutting, isn't it?

-Oh...

-Thank you very much indeed. Now, Ian.

-Yes?

-Welcome to the show.

-Thank you.

-And what do you do, Ian?

-Well, I'm retired now.

What did you do?

I was, for 15, the last 15 years at the Post Office, I was the gofer.

-Ah, you were the gofer! I thought you were the over-postman!

-No, no.

Sue being postmistress, it was, can you just go for this?

-Can you just go for that?

-LAUGHTER

Wow, so it's basically you counting all

the coppers into piles and doing all that and bagging them up.

-Yeah, yeah.

-So lovely to have retired from that!

-Certainly.

-And what sort of gofering are you doing for Sue these days?

-SHE LAUGHS

Oh, whatever she tells me to do, basically.

I don't know about that!

No, I do some DIY,

the heavy gardening jobs that she decides she doesn't want to do.

-I do it.

-OK! Ian, I'm going to stop you right there.

More for your sake than anyone else's.

-Before I dig too big a hole!

-This board is all yours.

Do you want to go through it and see how many answers you can get?

There's only two of them that I think I know.

The top one I'm sure is Denise Lewis.

And I think the one I'm going to go for is the javelin thrower,

-which I think is Steve Backley.

-Steve Backley, says Ian.

Steve Backley, no red line for you, for the lovely reason that you're already through.

But let's see how many people said Steve Backley.

It's right.

That's a very, very good answer, Ian,

cos look, it goes all the way down to 9.

The best score of the round! Very well done indeed.

And 64 is the joint lowest score of the round as well as your total.

Well played, Ian. Terrific answer. Let's fill in the rest of this board.

You were right about Denise Lewis.

She would have scored you a few more points. She would have scored 11.

Now, the basketball player is not Michael Jordan.

It's Magic Johnson, I'm afraid. That's unlucky. Three points for him.

The Irish jockey is Katie Walsh. That would have scored you 6.

And the badminton player is Nathan Robertson. He would have scored you 5.

-So, Magic Johnson actually the best answer on the board.

-Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

So, at the end of our first round, the pair heading home with

their high score of 200, I don't believe it, it's Fareed and Danny.

This wasn't in the script at all!

-No. I wouldn't be acting like this if it were.

-Oh, I'm so sorry.

We have to say goodbye. I mean, a stunning performance from you last time round,

through to the head-to-head.

We had high hopes of you as finalists this time.

-At least it was 200. A good way to go.

-I guess it is. Well, anyway, great to have you on.

Fareed and Danny, thank you so much for playing. Fareed and Danny.

-Great contestants!

-APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two!

OK, so three pairs remain.

Obviously at the end of this round,

we will have to say goodbye to another pair. Well, very well done.

Jenny and Richard, Ian and Sue, you are tied on 64 there,

our low scorers.

Ian, you were the lowest individual scorer so well done, and actually, I have to say,

nothing wrong with Gayle and Sarah's performance on the far podium.

It was all very close indeed.

Best of luck to all three pairs for Round Two. Our category is...

Can you all decide in your pairs who is going to go first,

who is going to go second?

And whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many capital cities

beginning with C, I, T or Y as they could.

Capital cities beginning with C, I, T and Y. Richard.

Yes, we're simply looking for any world capital

whose English name begins with a C, an I, a T or a Y, please.

Obviously it has to be a capital of a country

that is a sovereign state that is a member of the UN in its own right.

-Very, very best of luck.

-Thank you very much indeed.

So, Sue, we come to you first.

Er...

I think I'm going to say Cardiff.

Cardiff, says Sue.

Let's see if that's right, Cardiff,

and if it is, let's see how many people said it.

I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer, Sue.

100 points that scores you.

Sorry, it's always been the same since episode one of Pointless.

Our definition of country is the UK, rather than England, Scotland, Northern Ireland and Wales

-so Cardiff not allowed. It's a shame.

-It's a shame.

-It's clearly a capital, but not a capital of a country as we would define it.

-Indeed.

-Thank you very much indeed, Richard. Now, Jenny, we come to you.

-Erm...

-I can feel his eyes boring into the side of my head!

-LAUGHTER

Erm...

Trinidad. I don't think that's right, but...

It's not right, judging by Richard's reaction.

His eyes are now boring into the floor, if it's any consolation.

I've had a complete brain freeze.

Trinidad! Well, let's get this over with. Trinidad, is it right?

Ooh, I'm afraid not.

Trinidad is an incorrect answer, scoring you 100 points.

-It's going very well.

-Isn't it?

Yeah, Trinidad and Tobago is a country, of course,

-and Port of Spain is the capital.

-Now, Sarah.

Thank goodness I've had time to think.

You've also been given a couple of other helpers as well along the way!

Fingers crossed, I'm going to say Tokyo.

Tokyo, says Sarah. Let's see how many of our 100 people said Tokyo.

It's right.

-19.

-APPLAUSE

Very well done indeed, 19 for Tokyo.

It's got more Michelin stars than any other city in the world, Tokyo.

-I didn't know that.

-Yeah.

And it's been attacked and destroyed by Godzilla 28 times officially.

You'd have thought they'd have learned by now.

-You would think, wouldn't you?

-Yeah. There we are.

Let's take a look at those scores.

Sarah and Gayle looking very strong at this stage, I wonder why,

and then we travel up to 100,

where we find Jenny and Richard and Sue and Ian.

Best of luck. Can the second players please step up to the podium?

So, Gayle, any capital city, remember,

beginning with the letters C, I, T or Y.

I was absolutely dreading this, I really was.

The only thing I can think of is Istanbul.

Istanbul! Istanbul, says Gayle. Here is your red line.

If you can score 80 or less, you are definitely in the head-to-head.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Istanbul.

Oh, I'm afraid not a capital city, Gayle. It scores you 100 points.

It's opened the door, hasn't it? It's not the capital of Turkey, Istanbul.

Ankara is the capital of Turkey.

There are people at home who would kill for this round.

People love their capitals and stuff like that.

This is the sort of round that could have added a bit of money to the jackpot.

-Certainly.

-It doesn't look like it's going that way.

Although I think, Ian, I think up those short sleeves of his,

he has a couple of doozies.

OK, now, Richard.

Yeah, not too bad, not too bad.

I've got a few in mind.

-I'm going to go for Tallinn.

-Tallinn, says Richard.

Tallinn, there we are.

Now, you have a red line and it's there.

You want to be scoring 18 or less.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Tallinn.

It's right.

That will do the job. Very well done indeed!

8 for Tallinn sees you comfortably through to the next round.

Well done!

Good mopping-up operation there, Richard, 108 your total.

Yeah, the capital of Estonia.

And as IT workers, you'll be interested to know

it's the headquarters of Nato's cyber defence industry.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. Now, Ian. Ian, this is your moment.

18 or less is what we need.

I've got two answers, one I think is higher than the other.

-I'm going for Tehran.

-Tehran, says Ian. There's your red line.

Get below that with Tehran and you're in the head-to-head.

Let's see how many people said Tehran.

It's right.

Very well done indeed, you're through.

Look at that, 12 for Tehran.

APPLAUSE

No gofer at all, Ian. A hero, that's what you are, a hero.

112 is your total, you are through to the head-to-head.

Yeah, the capital of Iran.

-What a turnaround on the second pass that was, wasn't it?

-Yeah.

You'd have had a lot of money on podium three going out there, I think.

Anyone have any others, any riskier ones they were going to go for?

-I thought Yemen.

-That's a country, I'm afraid.

-I thought it was a capital.

-Casablanca?

-It's not a capital.

I would honestly give up now.

LAUGHTER

-Canberra?

-Canberra is up there.

It would have scored 30 points, actually the biggest scorer of all.

The capital of Morocco is Rabat and the capital of Yemen is Sana'a,

but I'm afraid not answers here. There are four pointless answers.

Very well done, anyone at home who said Chisinau,

which is the capital of Moldova.

Tarawa, which is the capital of Kiribati, very well done if you got that.

Tegucigalpa, which is the capital of Honduras

and Thimphu, which is the capital of Bhutan.

There are some low scorers.

I won't read out all the countries.

Castries, Colombo, Yerevan, Yamoussoukro and Conakry,

all those would have scored you 1,

and 2 points for Yaounde, Tirana, Cape Town and Tashkent.

Tbilisi also a good answer with four points.

So, at the end of our second round,

the pair who are heading home with a high score of 119, I'm afraid, it's Gayle and Sarah.

Oh, dear! What a turnaround, as Richard said.

-It was a TURKEY of an answer!

-Yeah, oh...

-LAUGHTER

There we go, there we go.

We've got that and so much to look forward to next time you come back.

But it's been lovely having you on the show.

Thank you very much, Gayle and Sarah!

APPLAUSE

But for Jenny and Richard and Ian and Sue,

it's now time for our head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

Congratulations, Jenny and Richard, Ian and Sue.

You're one step closer to the final

and a chance to play for our jackpot,

which currently stands at...

Well done, both of you!

Both newcomers to the show,

both straight through to the head-to-head.

We've had some great answers from you individually,

some surprisingly high scores as well.

But from here on in, you can chat before you give your answers.

Let's hope it should be a combination of the best of all your answers

and I think it'll be very exciting.

Best of luck to both players, let's play the head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

OK, here comes your first question and it concerns...

Space Travellers, Richard.

I'm going to show you pictures of five people who have travelled in space. Can you identify them?

OK, let's reveal our five space travellers, and here they come.

We have...

There we are, five space travellers.

Jenny and Richard, you've been our low scorers throughout,

so you will go first.

-Is A Buzz Aldrin?

-I don't know.

-OK, we have no idea.

-No, it's not the best round for us at all.

Because I know two astronauts,

I'm going to take a punt on one of them and A - Buzz Aldrin.

A - Buzz Aldrin. A - Buzz Aldrin.

Now then, Ian and Sue, the board is all yours. Talk us through it.

Well, I wish we could.

I'm sure I know the first names of the two females,

but I can think of the surnames.

-The only one I'm going for is C - Yuri Gagarin.

-Yuri Gagarin, C.

Let's see, OK. Now, Jenny and Richard went for Buzz...

-I nearly said Buzz Lightyear!

-LAUGHTER

-Oh, dear!

-I would have known him.

-I know that one!

-He might be one of them, you never know.

Jenny and Richard have gone for Buzz Aldrin for A.

Let's see if that's right and if so,

let's see how many of our 100 people said Buzz Aldrin.

Not Buzz Aldrin. Now, Ian and Sue have said Yuri Gagarin is C.

Let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

It's right.

26.

-APPLAUSE

-But most crucially, it was right, which means,

Ian and Sue, after one question, you are up 1-0.

A, I suspect, is the other astronaut you know.

He's one of the most famous people in human history,

-but only 12 points for Neil Armstrong.

-No!

B is the first Briton ever in space.

It would have scored you 9 points.

There is Gagarin, the first man in space.

D is the most experienced British-born astronaut of all.

And E is the first woman in space.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. So here comes your second question.

Jenny and Richard, you have to win this one to stay in the game

so best of luck. It concerns...

Hitchcock Films, Richard.

We're going to give you five incomplete titles of Hitchcock Films now.

We need you to fill in the blanks, please.

OK, let's reveal our five Hitchcock films, and here they are.

Ian and Sue, it's over to you.

-Shall we do that, then?

-Yeah, go on, then.

I think were going to go for Torn Curtain.

Torn Curtain, say Ian and Sue.

Now, Jenny and Richard, the board is all yours.

-Do you want to talk us through it?

-No!

-LAUGHTER

Certainly another not very good round for us.

Shall we take a punt at North By South?

-We'll take a bit of a guess - North By South.

-North By South.

OK, Ian and Sue, you have gone for Torn Curtain.

Let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many people said that.

It's right.

-20.

-APPLAUSE

20 for Torn Curtain.

Now, Jenny and Richard have gone for North By South.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people said that.

Oh, not North By South, I'm afraid,

which means, Ian and Sue, very well done.

After only two questions, you are straight through to the final, 2-0.

Yes, very big scorer, that first one. It is of course North By Northwest.

It would have scored you 69 points.

It's The Lady Vanishes.

This is his last film, his last film to be released,

Family Plot is the answer there.

And the bottom one is Juno And The Paycock.

I think that might be the first time I've said "paycock" on Pointless.

-I think it is, yes, it is.

-And that was the second.

I said Juno And The Paycock, that was the first.

-Oh, I see what you mean, yes, yes.

-Then I said, "That's the first time I've said, 'paycock'."

-Now I've said it four times.

-You are clocking up the paycocks.

-Now you've said it once. 4-1 to me.

-OK. Paycock, paycock, paycock.

-Oh, look at that!

-4-4.

-Just one more to equalise. Paycock! Oh, dear!

-That's 5-4, but it's first to six. Paycock, paycock.

-Oh, no!

-Got to be gutted with that.

-6-5 in Battle of the Paycocks.

-Look at that!

Oh, 7-5!

Hang on! OK, there we are.

So, the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round are Jenny and Richard.

-North by Northwest, that not ring a bell?

-BOTH: It does now!

It's always a very difficult thing

when you're standing there behind the podium, I know, the pressure does make the things disappear.

You've done so well today. We'll expect great things next time we see you,

but thanks very much in the meantime, Jenny and Richard.

-Thank you.

-APPLAUSE

But for Ian and Sue, it's now time for our Pointless Final.

Congratulations, Ian and Sue.

You've fought off all the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless Trophy.

You have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot

and at the end of today's show, the jackpot stands there at...

Well, very well done! What a solid performance.

-Well, I think I was saved, actually.

-Well, you've been helped.

You've certainly been helped.

But no, you've been nice low scorers each time

and then 2-0 in the head-to-head, no denying that.

Very strong performance there.

What would you like to see come up in this last round?

I say that like I'm going to produce it for you. I'm not.

Well, for me, I'd like to see something to do with plants

or dogs or food, something like that.

-Ian?

-Rugby?

-LAUGHTER

OK. Well, as always, you get to choose your category

from the four we've put up on the board for you.

Let's hope there's something up there that you like the look of.

Today's selection is...

-I think so.

-I think there's only one choice.

I think there's only one choice. I'm lost on Cult and Architecture.

I think it's going to have to be Cliff.

-It's going to be Cliff Richard.

-I think so.

We're looking for any of the following, please.

We're looking for any of the tracks on Cliff's 100th album,

The Fabulous Rock 'N' Roll Songbook, released in 2013.

Oh, it's called The Fabulous Rock 'N' Roll Songbook!

-I thought that was your little verdict on it.

-Not so much.

We are looking for any of Cliff Richard's number-one singles.

Double A-sides count as separate answers.

We are looking for any feature film made for cinema release

for which Cliff Richard received an acting credit,

and those last two are up to February 2014.

Tracks from the Songbook, number-one singles and feature film credits.

Very best of luck.

OK, thanks very much. As always, you've got up to a minute to come up with three answers.

If you're going to walk away with that jackpot of £1,000,

-one of those answers has to be pointless. Are you ready?

-BOTH: Yes.

OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock. There they are.

Your time starts now.

Films, you've got Summer Holiday, The Young Ones.

His first one, I'm sure was Expresso Bongo, which was very early on.

Number ones, you have Living Doll, Travellin' Light...

-Travellin' Light, that would be a good one.

-Erm...

Oh, God. There is When The Girl In Your Arms Is The Girl In Your Heart.

-OK.

-The Girl In Your Heart Is The Girl In Your Arms.

Summer Holiday, obviously, the musical.

Well, let's go for Expresso Bongo.

Yeah. Travellin' Light, I think, is a better one than Living Doll.

-And that other one?

-Well, I'm not sure about that one.

I can't think of that one, the other one would have to be...

Erm, oh...

It's on one of his later albums, I can't think of it now.

10 seconds left.

-I think I'll have to do...

-The Young Ones.

-The Young Ones, OK.

That's fine, yep.

OK, sounds like you've arrived at your answers

and your time is now up. So what are those answers going to be?

Film credits are The Young Ones and Expresso Bongo.

-UK number ones - Travellin' Light.

-Travellin' Light.

Now, of those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-Expresso Bongo.

-Expresso Bongo we put last.

-Least likely to be pointless?

-The Young Ones.

OK, let's put those answers up on the board in that order, and here they are.

We've got...

There they are. Well, very best of luck.

Three good answers on the board there.

Remember, only one of them has to be pointless for you to win the jackpot of £1,000.

What would you do if you won that, Ian?

Well, we're off on a family holiday next week

so it's certainly going to let us have a very good family holiday.

That would be wonderful. Sue, anything you'd like to add to that?

No, we've just had a new granddaughter

-so I think we might spoil her a bit.

-Lovely.

OK, well, very best of luck, as I say.

The Young Ones was probably the one you thought was least likely to pointless.

Let's just put that one to the test first. Is it pointless for £1,000?

-I don't think so.

-I don't think so.

Well, it's right.

We were looking for Cliff Richard film credits

and The Young Ones is certainly one of those.

Down it goes through the 20s. Into the teens...

Ooh, yes, 12.

APPLAUSE

-I thought it would be higher than that.

-There we are.

12, nothing wrong with that. A perfectly good score.

Not pointless, though. Only two more shots at today's jackpot.

Your next answer was Travellin' Light.

In this case, we were looking for number-one singles by Cliff Richard.

It has to be right. You sure it was number one?

I'm doubting myself now.

Well, it has to be number one

and then it has to be pointless for you to win.

Let's see, for £1,000, how many people said Travellin' Light.

It is right.

Your first answer was The Young Ones,

which took us all the way down to 12.

Travellin' Light now takes us down through the 20s

and the teens into single figures

passes five, still going down...

You've done it! Very well done indeed! Wow, that's fantastic!

-APPLAUSE

-Congratulations! Very, very well done indeed! Brilliant!

-Well done!

-Wow!

A record-breaking sixth consecutive win on Pointless

-and very well done indeed.

-Thank you.

Travellin' Light was a pointless answer which means you go home with our jackpot of £1,000.

-Superb!

-APPLAUSE

Six in a row, how about that? Very well played, Ian and Sue.

That's a nice category for you.

Expresso Bongo, if you'd had to go onto that,

-would have scored you two points.

-Oh!

So very well done. Let's take a look at the pointless answers.

All sorts of rock and roll standards on this album.

You could have had Rave On as well.

You could have had Dream Lover

so there were lots of rock and roll standards there that were pointless.

Well done if you said any of those.

Let's take a look at Number One Singles.

There were five pointless answers there,

very well done if you said one.

And Films, let's take a look.

So very well done if you said one of those

and congratulations on making it six jackpot wins in a row.

Very impressive!

Thanks very much indeed and thanks once again to our winning pair,

Ian and Sue, who go away with today's jackpot.

Join us next time, when we will be putting more obscure knowledge to the test on Pointless.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye for me. Goodbye!

APPLAUSE