Episode 33 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed.

Hello! I'm Alexander Armstrong, and welcome to Pointless,

the game where we aim for the obscure and ignore the obvious.

Let's meet today's players.

And couple number one.

Hi, I'm Richard. This is my fiance, Jenny,

and we're from Watford.

Couple number two.

Hello. I'm Jo, this is my mother, Andrea. We're from East Sussex.

Couple number three.

Hi, I'm Elliott and this is my brother Tim,

and we're from Southend, in Essex.

And finally, couple number four.

Hi. I'm Sarah from Blackburn

and this my friend Gayle from Oswaldtwistle.

And these are today's contestants.

-APPLAUSE

-Thanks very much, all of you.

We'll find out more about you as the show goes along.

That just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

When he sits in that chair, he's the smartest man in London.

Then when he stands behind it,

he's the third largest natural structure in the United Kingdom.

It's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

Hiya. Hi, everybody.

-Good afternoon to you.

-And to you.

We have now had six jackpot wins in a row.

-Don't even.

-In a row.

-Yeah, I know.

-Remember the old days

when we got the jackpot up to 25 grand and all sorts of things?

-Yeah.

-Six in a row. Incredible stuff for Iain and Sue last time.

They did very, very well.

Coming back from that show, Jenny and Richard who got knocked out

in the head-to-head, very unfortunate to do so.

And Gayle and Sarah are back as well. Got knocked out in Round Two.

Hopefully we'll see a bit more of you.

-Got two boys from Southend.

-Hmm.

Now, Southend has something in common, for me,

with Newcastle and Birkenhead,

which they're my three favourite places

to hear someone who's from that place saying the name of it.

Southend is always... LOCAL ACCENT: ..Southend.

LOCAL ACCENT: Birkenhead.

It's always good. LOCAL ACCENT: And Newcastle.

Those are my favourite places that I like hearing the accents

of the people that live in them.

Dudley not getting a look in?

-Oh, and Dudley.

-And Dudley.

-Absolutely lovely.

-Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

-Pleasure.

So, as you've gathered, Iain and Sue won the jackpot last time,

so today's jackpot starts off back at £1,000. There it is.

Let's see if we can have seven wins on the trot.

If everyone is ready, let's play Pointless.

APPLAUSE

Now, remember, at all times, the pair with the highest score

at the end of each round will be eliminated.

That's the rule.

Just do everything you can to make sure that's not your pair.

Our first category today is...

Hit Singles. Can you all decide in your pairs

who's going to go first, who's going to go second?

And, whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

OK. And the question concerns...

Songs For Bedtime. Richard.

On each board we're going to show you the names of seven UK top 20 singles

all of which contain the word "sleep" or "dream".

We've also given you the initials of the act who had a top 20 hit

with them. Can you tell us who that act is, please?

14 in all to have a go at home.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

We're looking for the acts who had hits with these sleep-related songs.

And here is our first pool of seven.

ALEXANDER READS BOARD

I'll read those all one last time.

-Now, then, Richard, a warm welcome back.

-Hello.

-Remind us what you do.

I'm an IT engineer for a resale company.

-And you are engaged to Jenny.

-I am indeed.

-Planning a big wedding?

-Yes.

Where are you going to get married?

It's in Bury, just outside Manchester.

-Very good indeed.

-It's where Jenny's homeland is.

-Lovely.

Have you made any special plans for the wedding?

You've got a little bit of time to plan it.

Yeah. We've been doing some stuff, haven't we?

We've got the location and the dress.

That's the most important thing.

By "special plans", you know what I meant, Jenny, I meant your dress.

-Yes.

-OK...

-I would arrive in a helicopter, that's what I would do.

-Please do.

-Not only arrive in a helicopter,

actually go into the church.

-Go down the aisle in a helicopter.

-Wow. Whoa!

Coming through the west door, they'd have to open it

and you'd have to come in at a bit of an angle.

-Like that.

-Rotors, all the hats and orders of service flying around.

-Everywhere.

-A lot of people... Jenny's veil when she gets out...

-Yes.

-It's going to be... Yeah, it's going to be a health hazard.

Cool, though.

-Imagine the photos.

-I'd love it.

A vicar's wig flying off.

JENNY CHUCKLES

-His cassock ballooning up.

-Like Marilyn Monroe.

-Yeah!

-LAUGHTER

OK. So, Richard, what are you going to go for?

Uh, going to go with

No Sleep Till Brooklyn, Beastie Boys.

Beastie Boys, says Richard. Sounds good to me.

Let's see if it's right and how many of our 100 people said it.

Beastie Boys is of course right.

36.

36 for the Beastie Boys.

Number 14 hit for the wonderful Beastie Boys.

It's their second UK top 40 hit.

Excellent, Richard. Now, Jo, welcome to Pointless.

Great to have you here. What do you do, Jo?

At the moment I've just got back from working in a ski resort.

-Oh, now that's fun.

-Yeah.

-How many months were you out there?

-Five months.

-Are you missing it?

-..December. No.

-Oh, really?!

-I was ready to come home.

-A lot of hard work?

-Definitely.

-Were you in a chalet?

-Yes.

Were you doing cooking and all that sort of stuff?

No, my boyfriend's a chef, so he takes care of the whole food side.

-You doing a lot of...

-That's not my forte.

Good Lord. And you and your boyfriend still speaking

-after five months of chalet running?

-Definitely.

That's very good indeed.

So what are you going to do with the rest of this year?

I want to get a job in the civil service.

-OK. Well, listen, we have a lot of civil servants on the show.

-I know.

-Maybe you've already got a job, I don't know.

-Not yet.

-If someone hasn't yet approached you, they will.

-Here I am.

OK. Now, Jo, what are you going to go for on this board?

Um...

I think there are two that I know.

But I don't know which one is going to score the least,

so I'm going to say Sweet Dreams - Are Made Of This, the Eurythmics.

The Eurythmics, says Jo. Eurythmics. Let's see if that's right

and how many people said it for Sweet Dreams - Are Made Of This.

It's right.

55.

It's right. It's a whole lot better than 100, Jo.

Yeah, it was their first ever UK top 40 single, Sweet Dreams.

-Got to number two.

-And remains an excellent song.

-No...

-You're not sure?

-Yeah.

-Normally my musical taste and yours are generally quite close.

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-We rowed about Prince once.

-Yeah, you didn't like Prince.

Now we're having this big row about Sweet Dreams.

-We're having a ding-dong.

-Ouch.

-Oh, ow! Bruising.

This is bad, isn't it? I feel like I've shared a chalet with you

for five months. LAUGHTER

Not for the first time.

Yeah, not for the first time. Fair enough. Now, Elliott, welcome.

Great to have you here from Southend.

-Just say where you're from again.

-Southend.

Oh, how disappointing. I thought he was going to go, "Southend!"

You poshed it up a little bit there, Elliott.

I tried a little bit harder now you put the pressure on me.

-Elliott, what do you do?

-I'm an insurance broker in the City.

And in your spare time, Elliott, what are your interests?

-Sport, mainly.

-Sport.

-Tennis.

-Tennis.

I like football and cricket as well.

I play a lot of tennis.

-Do you take your tennis very seriously?

-Yes.

I'm quite competitive, so if I lose it kind of ruins my day.

Right. I see. Do you just play with friends

or do you play in proper tournaments?

-No, tournaments still.

-Oh, still?

-Yes.

-Did...you used to play?

Used to play at a high standard, yes, and then sort of

found other things and gave it up, but I'm back into it now.

Oh, really? So you might have been

one of the great hopes of British tennis?

There was potential there, but no, unfortunately.

Who... Were you playing alongside Andy Murray and things like that?

Andy Murray was at a couple of tournaments when I was younger, yes.

Did you ever play him?

We had a kind of trial match and it didn't end well.

For him.

-Yeah, am I right?

-No, I got duffed up. I got duffed up.

But it was a good experience.

Hang on a minute... Oh, do you mean you were beaten? He beat you?

-Oh, yes.

-OK, sorry. Phwoar, I was just thinking,

"You can take the boy out of Southend," but, really...

Now, Elliott, what are you going to go for on this board?

It's not good, unfortunately.

I know it's going to be high but I'm going to go for the bottom one,

Never Had A Dream Come True, S Club 7.

S Club 7, says Elliott.

Can't think what else it could be.

But let's see how many of our 100 said S Club 7.

Well, it is S Club 7. Look at that.

Well, that tells you a lot about our 100 people. 54.

It's not the highest score.

Well done, Elliott. Yeah, S Club 7.

It does make you philosophically wonder

whether "Seven" begins with S or whether it begins with 7.

Well, that right. Interesting.

But their name is the number 7, so that's what we went with.

Perfectly right.

-Now, Gayle, welcome back.

-Hi.

We had to say goodbye to you at the end of Round Two last time.

We'll see no repeat of that, surely, this time.

-No, Round One this time.

-CHUCKLING:

-Oh, really?

-Is it really that bad, the board?

-I'm going to have to guess.

-Are you?

-Yeah.

OK, well, before you do that, Gayle, remind us what you do.

-I run an arts centre in Oswaldtwistle.

-Oswaldtwistle.

-Yeah.

-Very good.

And in your spare time...

I mean, such scraps of spare time as you get,

what do you like getting up to?

Well, I've got two children, teenagers,

-so I spend a lot of time with them as well.

-Right, OK. Very good.

-Now, talk us...or at least do some thinking out loud...

-Guessing.

-..as we go through the board. Anything you want to...?

-OK.

Well, BJ, I guess could be Billy Joel.

AK, Alicia Keys.

And BD, I've got in the back of my mind something like Bobby Darin.

-Alicia Keys.

-Alicia Keys, you're going to say.

Try Sleeping With A Broken Heart. OK.

Well, let's see if that's right, Alicia Keys,

and if it is, let's see how many people said it.

It's right.

That is a very, very good guess, Gayle.

Look at that, 7!

Now, that was gutsy and that really, really paid off.

7 it scored you.

I was just waiting for Alison Krauss to come up there.

-But no, it wasn't.

-No, great answer, Gayle. Very well played.

Try Sleeping With A Broken Heart. I tell you what,

she should try sleeping with a broken hot water bottle,

-that's even worse.

-Yeah.

-LAUGHTER

But probably less of a hit.

You were right about Bobby Darin as well. Dream Lover.

Scores more points, though, scores 21 points.

I'll Sleep When I'm Dead, not Billy Joel.

It's Bon Jovi.

28.

-And the best answer on the board - Sleeping In My Car...

-Is Roxette.

Roxette, yes. 6 points.

There we are. Thank you very much. We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at those scores. 7, Gayle, well done.

That was just reward there for taking a leap into the unknown.

That puts you and Sarah at the top of the table.

Then up to 36, quite a hike, where we find Richard and Jenny.

Then 54, well done, Elliott and Tim.

And 55, you're not way ahead but, Jo and Andrea,

you are our high scorers.

So, Andrea, you know what we need from you in the next pass.

Best of luck. We'll come back down the line now.

Second players, please step up to the podium.

OK. We're going to put seven more songs up on the board,

and here they come. We have got...

I'll read those one last time.

Sarah.

Well, that's taken a bit of pressure off, hasn't it?

Thank God I'm first.

Well, yes, exactly. You have a box-fresh board there.

Sarah, remind us what you do.

I'm retired.

Remind us what you did, Sarah.

I was a school teacher at a sixth form college.

-Right you are. And what did you teach?

-Film, media, theatre.

And English.

And English. OK. And what do you do now?

I travel, I'm learning Italian, I do a bit of charity work, um...

How's your Italian going?

-Molto bene.

-Ah, that's a shame(!)

Oh, that's a shame, yeah.

You haven't yet been to Italy to put it all into practice?

Oh, no, I've been to Italy lots, but I've only learnt recently.

-Not since you started learning?

-No. Good reason to go.

Yeah, very good. Great excuse.

OK, listen, there you are, you're on 7.

If you can score 47 or less,

you are definitely in Round Two.

OK.

Well, being a child of the '60s, I'm going for Daydream Believer,

The Monkees.

The Monkees, says Sarah. Here comes your red line.

If you can get below that with Daydream Believer,

you are into Round Two.

Let's see how many people said The Monkees.

It's right.

-72!

-Ooh.

Ooh, that's a big score there for Daydream Believer.

79 is your total.

I wonder if that's enough to keep you in the game. I think it will be.

Yeah, they only had one number one, The Monkees. It was I'm A Believer.

I tell you what, The Monkees - Greatest Hits

-is a great album as well.

-I bet it is, yeah.

It's full of songs written by amazing people.

Neil Sedaka and Carole King and all sorts of people wrote for them.

Wonderful. Thanks, Richard. Now, Tim, welcome to the show.

Good to have you here. What do you do, Tim?

I'm a production and shift manager in a dairy.

-Very good. Whereabouts is that?

-In Chadwell Heath.

What is your shift? Or does it vary all the time?

It's four days on, four days off and it's six till six,

so it's quite a long shift.

That is long, isn't it? Wow.

And what are your interests outside of the dairy?

Just mainly the same as Elliott. Sport, really.

Football, cricket, golf, things like that.

-I notice you've left tennis out.

-Yes. No good at tennis.

-Oh, really?

-No.

Yeah, he's used to give me a bit of a beating,

so I stayed well away from the tennis court.

Very good. OK, listen, you're on 54.

If you can score 24 or less, you can take your place in Round Two.

Now, the last round would have been a lot better for me.

I'm struggling on this one, to be honest. I'm looking for...

There's only one I think I know, which is Sleeping With The Light On.

I think that might be Beyonce.

Beyonce, says Tim, for Sleeping With The Light On.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said it.

There is your red line.

Bad luck, Tim.

That's great news for Sarah and Gayle

but terrible news for Tim and Elliott.

I'm afraid that it's not Beyonce.

Scores you 100 points, takes your total to 154.

Sorry, Tim. You absolutely nailed the initial, though.

That was terrific. LAUGHTER

Thanks very much indeed. Now, Andrea. Andrea, welcome to the show.

What do you do, Andrea?

At the moment I'm a waitress in a hotel, local hotel,

but I am training to be an accountant.

That's fun. So when do you make the switch, do you think?

Um, I've only just started doing the accountancy,

so I've got quite a way to go yet.

Yeah, OK. So how long do you think it's going to take?

-Probably a couple of years.

-Right.

-Yes.

OK. Do you think you would stay with the hotel?

-Maybe move to their accounts department?

-You never know.

-They might...let me.

-By then, you'll have learnt

your whole way around the hotel.

Couple of years after, you can take over.

Yeah, yeah, that's the plan.

-World domination.

-That's it, yeah. OK, well, listen, you're on 55.

You're in a very comfortable position.

98 or less sees you through.

All we need is a correct answer.

Well, the only one...

I know Talking In Your Sleep.

I can sing the song and I cannot think who CG is.

So the only one I actually know is the bottom one and that's Abba.

OK, Abba, I Have A Dream. Let's see if that's right.

There's your red line, lovely and high.

Get below that with Abba - I think you might -

and you are in Round Two.

It's absolutely right, of course.

Wow. Still going down.

Look at that, 45 for Abba.

Takes your total up to a lovely, round 100.

APPLAUSE

Yes, they had a number two hit with that

and Westlife had a number one hit with it.

They are the second most successful band in the history

of the world, Abba, in terms of record sales.

-Behind The Beatles, of course.

-Indeed.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. Now, Jenny.

Jenny, welcome. I've got fabulous news for you.

You are going to be in Round Two.

-Yes.

-There you are.

-Consider it a wedding present.

-Thank you so much.

So there we are. So, Jenny, tell us about yourself again.

I'm an IT test analyst for a retail company. I work with Richard.

-Indeed, that's where you met the man.

-I did.

All those years ago.

And in my spare time I like to do normal stuff, really,

cinema, watch a bit of sport. I like football in particular,

but I've got into American sports recently because of Richard

and his infinite knowledge of all things sporty.

I shouldn't say that, should I?

Well, you've said it, you can't un-say it now.

-We now know. And, of course, wedding planning.

-Wedding planning.

Is there anything that you haven't dared bring up in conversation

with Richard that now might be a good moment to bring up?

Anything you'd particularly like to see at the wedding?

No, actually, there's nothing.

He's getting to go on his big lads' blow-out to Las Vegas,

so I think he can't really moan at anything I want at the wedding.

Fair enough. And you've got the helicopter sorted?

Yes, I'm very excited about the helicopter.

Good idea. Also, I can think of one other thing.

Just cos I wasn't sure if you'd like the helicopter idea

cos some people...don't like that sort of thing.

I can see you do.

Is it anywhere near a river?

Actually, not too far from a river.

Tigers in speedboats.

-LAUGHTER

-I'm torn now.

-I don't know which one to go for.

-Do both, do both.

-Why not?

Richard's only saying that cos that's what I did at our wedding.

-But, yes, it was good.

-I remember our wedding.

LAUGHTER

-Lovely day.

-So, Jenny, what are you going to go for?

This is all yours, this board.

So, listen, feel free just to talk us through it.

Fill in all those little blanks.

I think I knew a few. I think One More Sleep is Leona Lewis.

Sleeping With The Light On is...

Ashamedly that I know this. ..Busted.

But I'm going to go for

Talking In Your Sleep, Crystal Gayle.

Crystal Gayle, Talking In Your Sleep, says Jenny.

Let's see if that's right,

let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

No red line for you because you're already through.

It is right.

19 for Crystal Gayle. Takes your total up to 55.

That's great work, Jenny. It's a lovely song, Talking In Your Sleep.

Crystal Gayle, does the name ring a bell now?

It's weird when you know the song.

I knew the Gayle, I just couldn't think what the C was.

Um, absolutely. No shame in knowing Busted. We love Busted on this show.

-Big fans of Busted here.

-5 points for Busted.

It's actually the best answer on the board.

You were right about One More Sleep, that's Leona Lewis.

She would have scored you 13.

Up the top there it is The Pretenders.

Would have scored you 16.

And Daydreamer, people of a certain age will know,

David Cassidy, 24 points.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

So at the end of our first round, the pair heading home

with our high score of 154, I'm afraid, Tim and Elliot, it is you.

-Oh, dear, they were two tough boards.

-Yeah.

But, yes, might you have got Busted instead of Beyonce, do you think?

-No, we're not Busted fans.

-OK.

So you're saying you are an S Club 7 fan?

Sorry, just to get that straight.

LAUGHTER

OK, Tim and Elliott, we have to say goodbye.

We'll see you again next time. We look forward to that very much.

But, Tim and Elliott, meantime, thanks very much for playing.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

And so three pairs remain.

At the end of this round, we'll have to say goodbye to another pair.

Well, I've got more plaudits to hand out and here they come.

Very well done to Jenny and Richard, our lowest scoring pair.

Well done to Gayle, fabulous low score, Alicia Keys.

You see, that happens on that last podium.

Sometimes you're forced into coming up with a good idea

that you perhaps wouldn't have gone for.

You'd have gone for a sort of Abba answer otherwise, wouldn't you?

-I don't know.

-A high scorer.

Anyway, Jo and Andrea, well done, simply. Great to have you here.

-It's great to...

-Our category for Round Two today is...

ALL CHUCKLE

-It's Football.

-Oh, God.

-Football.

Can you all decide in your pairs who is going to go first and second?

And whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name...

So we're looking for any football club in the top 30

of Deloitte's Money League.

Yeah, in early 2014 Deloitte's published its list

of the 30 richest football clubs in the world

based on revenues from the previous season.

Can you name any of those 30 clubs, please, from all around the world?

Thank you very much indeed.

Now, then, Jenny.

I can think of a couple.

I think I'll go with Real Madrid.

Real Madrid, says Jenny.

Let's see if that's right and how many of our 100 people said it.

It's right, good answer.

42.

42 for Real Madrid.

It was their ninth consecutive season on top of that money list as well.

The richest club in the world for nine seasons in a row.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard. Now, Jo.

Football is not the greatest topic for me.

I've got a few answers that are quite world-famous clubs

that I might be able to go for.

I'm going to say PSG.

-PSG...

-Yeah, Paris Saint-Germain.

-Paris Saint-Germain.

OK, let's see Paris Saint-Germain. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 said it.

It's right.

Well, 42 is our only score so far and you passed it, look at that.

Paris Saint-Germain, down to 12. Very well done indeed, Jo.

Well played, Jo. Fifth on the list with £341 million.

That's the interesting thing about these football lists,

we think of football as a huge industry, a huge worldwide industry,

but these revenues are sort of nothing compared to most industries.

They're actually very small companies. These...

That's revenues, not even profits.

Profits are almost non-existent at most of them.

If you want to make money, virtually anything apart from football

-would do it for you.

-Unless you are a footballer.

-Yes, then you can make a lot of money.

-Yeah.

They did say the way to make a small fortune out of football

is to start with a big one.

ALL CHUCKLE

Thank you very much indeed. Now, Gayle.

-Gayle.

-Yes.

What are you going to go for?

-Barcelona.

-Barcelona, says Gayle.

Let's see if that's right and how many of our 100 said Barcelona.

It is right. 42 our high score, 12 our low.

Past the high...

There you are at 38. Not bad at all, Gayle.

And they were second on the list for the fifth successive season as well.

So it goes Real, then Barcelona.

And in 2013, over 32 million people followed them

on social media platforms.

-Cor.

-Yeah, cor.

-Cor, I thought I'd shake it up a bit.

I say "wow" a lot.

Thank you very much. We're halfway through the round.

Let's look at the scores as they stand. Jo, well done.

Great answer there, PSG. Scores you 12 and puts you and your mum

at the top of the table.

Then up to 38 where we find Gayle and Sarah,

then up a little squeak beyond that and we find Jenny and Richard.

So, Richard, you know what you have to do.

I think you've got a good answer there.

Let's have a nice, low score. Best of luck.

We'll come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

So, Sarah, remember, we're looking for any team

that features in the top 30 of Deloitte's Football Money League.

I think you are going to be really good,

-so I'm going to go AC Milan.

-AC Milan, says Sarah.

AC Milan.

Here is your red line, so quite low.

If you get below that, you are definitely in the head-to-head.

Let's see how many people said AC Milan.

It's right.

Whoa, it's going to be close. Look at that, 14.

52 is your total.

Well played, Sarah. That's gutsy play, isn't it?

That's exactly the thing to do as well.

They call them the Rossoneri cos they play in red and black.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard. Now, Andrea.

Andrea, if you can score 39 or less, you are through to the head-to-head.

-I doubt it.

-Jo has set you up beautifully there.

I know, but football is the worst.

I know nothing about football.

I'm trying really hard to think of a team. Erm...

I'm not even sure if this is a team but I'm going to say it anyway

and fingers crossed, Bayern Munich.

-Bayern Munich.

-Is it a team?

-Bayern Munich, says Andrea.

There's your red line.

Let's see if you can get below that with Bayern Munich.

If you can, you are in the next round.

How many people said Bayern Munich?

-It's right.

-(Yes!)

-(Yes!)

-Well done, Andrea.

And you are in the head-to-head. That's great play there.

17 for Bayern Munich.

Very well deserved.

Low score of 29 in total.

Well played, Andrea. Very nice answer, Bayern Munich.

They were the third highest earners that season.

So it goes Real Madrid, Barcelona, Bayern Munich.

Won the Champions League, of course. Won the treble as well.

Excellent. Thanks, Richard. Now, Richard.

There you are on 42.

We need a score of 9 or less.

9 or less, Richard.

Can you do it?

Well, got a few in my head. Going to go with...

..Benfica.

Benfica, says Richard.

Benfica. Here's your red line.

It's low.

Get below that with Benfica, though,

and you are in the head-to-head for the second time.

Let's see if Benfica is right and how many people said it.

It's right.

You're in the head-to-head. Very well done indeed. 2 for Benfica.

Very well done.

44 is your total.

Yes, they were 26th on that list, the only Portuguese club there.

So you're talking of it being a small industry.

They've got revenues of less than £100 million

and yet they're one of the biggest revenue clubs in the entire world.

In any other industry that's nothing at all.

Let's take a look at the pointless answers. There's a few.

We'll start with the Brazilian team Corinthians.

Then the Italians, Lazio.

Marseille, from France, were on the list.

Also, could have had...

Newcastle United were on the list and a pointless answer.

Schalke were there. Stuttgart. Both of those from Germany.

Those are the only pointless answers.

There's 1 point for Ajax, Hamburg, Valencia,

and West Ham were on the list.

Amazing. INDISTINCT COMMENT

I know. ALL CHUCKLE

2 points for Fenerbahce and Napoli.

Benfica obviously is a terrific answer.

3 points for Galatasaray and Atletico Madrid.

5 for Inter Milan, 6 for Roma, 6 for Spurs.

7 for Borussia Dortmund

who were beaten by Munich in the Champions League Final.

12 for Juventus.

Then we've got the...all the English teams.

Liverpool - 24, Arsenal - 29, Man City - 29 and Chelsea - 33.

And the only other team we haven't had, Manchester United - 56.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

At the end of our second round, the pair who are heading home,

I'm afraid this time you really are going home...

Your score of 52,

not a terrible score by any means,

but it just happens to be the highest, it's Sarah and Gayle.

I'm afraid this is where we say goodbye, Sarah and Gayle.

It's been great having you. Thank you for playing.

-BOTH:

-Thank you.

But for the remaining two pairs, it's now time for the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Jenny and Richard, Jo and Andrea.

You are now one step closer to the final

and a chance to play for our jackpot which currently stands at £1,000.

Jenny and Richard, it's like Groundhog Day.

You're back here again,

our lowest-scoring pair in the head-to-head round.

Jo and Andrea, very well done.

Your first appearance on Pointless and through to the head-to-head.

Always a relief to get to this point, isn't it?

-You can chat.

-Yeah.

-Hooray! Makes a massive difference.

Listen, best of luck to both pairs. Let's play the head-to-head.

OK. Here comes your first question, and it concerns...

Statues Of Prime Ministers. Richard.

Going to show you five statues or sculptures of UK prime ministers now.

Can you name them, please?

OK, let's reveal our five statues. And here they come. We have got...

There we are.

Five statues of prime ministers.

Now, then, Jenny and Richard, you've been our low scorers,

so you will go first.

Feel free to confer.

Well, we've got a little bit of an idea of some of them,

but without...

Just want to get an answer on the board this time.

We'll go for B, Margaret Thatcher.

OK, nice obscure one there. B, Margaret Thatcher.

LAUGHTER

Jo and Andrea...

I think we'll go for A and we think that might be Harold Wilson.

You're going to say A, Harold Wilson.

OK, so we have Margaret Thatcher and Harold Wilson.

Jenny and Richard said Margaret Thatcher for B.

Let's see if that's right, let's see how many people said it.

It's ri... Ooh!

Look at that.

There you are, 94. 94 for Margaret Thatcher.

Jo and Andrea,

that's what you have to beat with Harold Wilson for A.

Let's see if that's right, let's see how many people said it.

Yes, very well done. That's what you needed.

Down it goes to...35.

APPLAUSE

Well done, Jo and Andrea. You've nicked it.

After one question you are up 1-nil. Richard.

Let's fill in the rest of this board.

C, it's in Parliament Square and it is David Lloyd George.

10 points for that.

D you'll find in Liverpool. It's Benjamin Disraeli.

Would have scored 15.

And E is an ice sculpture of...

I'm guessing it's Tony Blair.

-Tony Blair, yes.

-Really?

-Tony Blair never...

-Would have scored 41.

-..half-moon glasses.

It's peculiar, isn't it? It was made by climate change activists,

so presumably no longer exists.

There we are. Thanks very much indeed.

Here comes your second question.

Jenny and Richard, you have to win this to stay in the game.

Best of luck. It concerns...

One Foot In The Grave. Richard.

We're going to show you five clues now about the British sitcom

One Foot In The Grave. What's the most obscure answer?

Thanks very much. Let's reveal our five clues. And here they come.

We've got...

I'll read those all again.

Jo and Andrea, you will go first.

Erm, we're not really sure, other than the catchphrase,

which Joanna knew, which is probably too high.

So I'm going to go with the Monty Python star who has done

other songs and wrote music and I think it might be Eric Idle.

Eric Idle, say Jo and Andrea. Eric Idle.

OK, so, Jenny and Richard, the board is all yours. Talk us through it.

Know the catchphrase

and we think we know the bottom one.

-Do you want to go for the bottom one?

-Well...

Going from the bottom one from the language, I'm guessing it's Germany.

OK, you're going to say Germany.

OK, so we have Eric Idle and we have Germany.

Jo and Andrea are saying Eric Idle, the Monty Python star.

Let's see if that's right and how many of our 100 people

said Eric Idle.

It's right.

42.

-At least we got it right.

-Yeah.

-I think the catchphrase would have been more, wouldn't it?

-Yeah.

Jenny and Richard have said Germany, the country

where Mit Einem Bein Im Grab was their version.

Let's see if that's right and how many of our 100 people said Germany.

It's right.

72!

Well...

Jo and Andrea, very, very well done to you.

That means, after only two questions,

you are straight through to the final, 2-nil.

Yeah, high-scoring head-to-head there.

The first name of the character played by Annette Crosbie

would have won you the point. She was called Margaret.

Would have scored you 26.

The next one definitely wouldn't have done.

Big scorers you'd imagine for "I don't believe it!"

Would have scored you 81 points.

And the first name of Patrick's wife is Pippa.

And she would have scored you 8 points, best answer on the board.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

The pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round,

second time you've been our lowest-scoring pair

in the head-to-head, second time you've exited

the head-to-head round with nothing on the scoreboard.

I'm so sorry, Jenny and Richard.

It's been great having you on the show but we have to say goodbye.

-Thanks so much for playing.

-BOTH:

-Thank you.

-APPLAUSE

-Good luck, guys.

But for Jo and Andrea, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Andrea and Jo, you fought off all the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

-BOTH:

-Yay.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

If you do, you will go into Pointless history for,

who knows, maybe as much as 24 hours.

For the seventh consecutive winners for the first time ever,

very exciting indeed.

It'd certainly be a shocker if you didn't win these days.

I mean, that would be quite something, wouldn't it?

It would be a disappointment for the whole nation.

-No pressure then(!)

-Goodness, can you imagine?

No pressure, but certainly everyone is expecting it.

Well, that jackpot, just in case you have forgotten,

is standing currently at £1,000.

So there we are.

We've thrown a lot at you.

Anything you'd particularly like to see come up in this last round?

Obviously we've done statues of prime ministers, so don't say that.

Mum really likes rugby. Mum is really good at the rugby players.

OK. Jo, what would you like?

We're both quite good at literature, so that might be quite good.

Geography. Love a bit of geography.

-History, we're not bad at as well.

-Well, best of luck.

As always, you get to choose your category from the four

that we put upon the board. Let's see what we've got for you today.

Well, there we are.

Sport In 1996, The Blues Brothers,

Tyne And Wear, Modern Female Novelists.

Pretty much everything you asked for.

THEY SNIGGER

Sport In 1996?

Modern Female Novelists?

-Shall we go with that?

-OK, yeah. Modern Female Novelists, please.

Modern Female Novelists. Let's find out what the questions are. Richard.

OK, if you like literature, hopefully there is something for you.

Three great authors here.

We're looking for any novel published by A S Byatt,

we're looking for any novel published by Doris Lessing,

or we're looking for any novel published by

the wonderful Margaret Atwood.

And these are all up to April 2014.

Any novel published by any of those three wonderful authors.

Very, very best of luck.

Thanks very much indeed.

OK, as always, you've got up to a minute to come up with three answers

and all we need for you to win that jackpot is for just one of those

answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-Yes.

OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock. There they are.

Your time starts now.

-OK. Do you know any?

-I don't know any.

Oh, dear.

Margaret Atwood, do you know her?

I know who Margaret Atwood is.

Did she write anything you've read?

I haven't read... No, I don't know.

A S Byatt.

-I don't know any of these novels.

-OK, we'll have to make some up.

Margaret Atwood...

-Does she do things with, like, trees in the title?

-She might do.

Or like Into The Woods?

-Things like that?

-I don't know.

-I don't know.

-Make up some titles.

-OK. Well...

-Think of a good novel title.

Who's A S Byatt?

-I don't know.

-Don't know.

-I honestly don't know.

-Doris Lessing.

Oh, dear.

-We're breaking the run of winners.

-THEY LAUGH

-OK.

-What shall we make up?

Margaret Atwood, she's Canadian...

-Ten seconds left.

-Something Canadian.

-Into The Rockies.

-OK, that's one.

Next one.

Doris Lessing...

OK, your time is now up.

I'm afraid I need three answers.

-And if you could say which category you're...

-OK.

..making up an answer for, that would be fantastic.

ALL LAUGH

Can I just say, I have still got a very, very good feeling

about seven in a row. I'm still...

ANDREA AND JO LAUGH

-Oh, dear.

-OK.

-Margaret Atwood, Over The Rockies.

-Over the Rockies.

-BOTH:

-Yes.

Doris Lessing...

What did you say?

-On The Beach.

-On The Beach.

Quite a journey we're going on, isn't it?

-LAUGHTER

-Ah, where are we going to end up?

-A S Byatt wrote, um...

-Winter Wonderland.

-Winter Wonderland.

-Yeah, she wrote that, I'm sure of it.

Do you want to put those in any order or shall we take them

-in the order given?

-Any order you like.

-Alphabetical.

OK, we'll take them in the order they were given.

So we had Over The Rockies, On The Beach and Winter Wonderland.

OK, well, let's put those answers on the board. And here they are.

We have got Over The Rockies, On The Beach and Winter Wonderland.

Can I just say, before we do the tower,

can I just get your bank details?

Cos we tend to do it electronically, it's how we do...

It's how we give you the jackpot. So I just need to put it all in there.

We'll do it after. It would just be nice to get it out the way.

Yeah. Well, yes, sensible.

The moment you win, the moment the pointless answer comes,

-we're having an open-top bus tour of...

-All around Borehamwood.

-I can't wait.

-A ticker tape parade.

-So excited.

We've made ice sculptures of both of you.

Yeah? Good.

Then the night is but young.

We are due at Downing Street at 9am tomorrow.

Safe to say I don't think any of us will have slept but...

We're not going to be there.

Very best of luck. Your first answer was Over The Rockies.

Um, I don't know which one of these is going to win that jackpot, but...

..when it happens, what would you do with that £1,000?

I'd have the night out that you just described.

-Open-top bus tour straight to Downing Street.

-Yes.

-Get an ice sculpture of myself.

-Oh, that would be good, wouldn't it?

-I know!

-Superb.

-Lots of champagne, yeah, we'd love it.

-Yeah.

-Brilliant. Well, OK.

-Drinks will be on us if we win.

That would be nice, thank you.

So, we're looking for Margaret Atwood novels in this case,

and you have gone for Over The Rockies.

Let's see if it's right.

Oh!

Not Over The Rockies, I'm afraid.

Your next answer, in this case, we were looking for Doris Lessing

novels, and we have gone for On The Beach.

Let's see if that's right,

and if it is, let see how many people said it.

I'm sorry.

Last shot at a pointless answer.

-This is the one, this is the one.

-This is the one.

Winter Wonderland by A S Byatt.

HE SIGHS

For £1,000, let's see how many people said Winter Wonderland.

Yeah!

APPLAUSE

I am so sorry. Oh, I'm sorry.

Oh, there's nothing worse.

There is nothing worse than one of these final rounds

when, you know, it's something you don't know.

I'm afraid you didn't manage to find that pointless answer,

but you've come up with some great ideas.

I'm afraid, though, you didn't win our jackpot of £1,000.

That rolls over on to the next show.

But we've loved having you on the show

and a great performance throughout, so lots to be proud of.

And you get to take home our Pointless trophy,

so very, very well done.

Thank you.

APPLAUSE

Yeah, Jo and Andrea, you really have played terrifically.

Great fun as well. Sometimes those categories come up.

It's just...not your day. It wasn't your day today.

It's very unfortunate, but thank you so much for genuinely giving us

a laugh as well. You were a lot of fun doing it.

Let's take a look at some of the pointless answers

that you could have made up.

You could have made up A Whistling Woman.

See, Angels & Insects, that could have come to you.

The Biographer's Tale, The Shadow Of The Sun.

You also could have had Still Life or The Game.

Both eminently make uppable, Still Life and The Game.

Let's take a look now at Doris Lessing.

If The Old Could, Martha Quest, The Cleft, The Good Terrorist.

You also could have had A Proper Marriage,

A Ripple From The Storm, Alfred & Emily,

Ben, In The World, Briefing For A Descent Into Hell.

That's one you could have made up, surely.

All sorts of answers from Doris Lessing there.

In fact, the only ones that scored points with Doris Lessing were

The Golden Notebook, The Grass Is Singing and The Fifth Child.

All her other novels are pointless.

So if you said one, very, very well played.

And we'll finish off with the wonderful Margaret Atwood.

Some big books here. Alias Grace, Life Before Man, The Edible Woman.

You could have had The Robber Bride.

You could have had Bodily Harm, Lady Oracle and Surfacing as well.

Very well done if you got any of those. It's been a great show.

You've really been terrific,

and so sorry we threw that awful final category at you.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

Unfortunately, we have to say goodbye, Andrea and Jo,

but we've loved having you and you played so well.

Thank you so much. Great contestants, Andrea and Jo.

APPLAUSE

Well, very sadly, Andrea and Jo didn't win our jackpot today,

which means it rolls over onto the next show

when we will be playing for £2,000.

Join us next time to see if someone can win it.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

APPLAUSE