Episode 26 Pointless


Episode 26

Quiz in which contestants try to score as few points as possible by plumbing the depths of their general knowledge to come up with the answers no-one else can think of.


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Transcript


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APPLAUSE

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Thank you very much indeed.

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Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless,

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the show where the aim of the game is to score as few points as you can.

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You do that by coming up with the answers no-one else can think of.

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Let's meet today's players.

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Couple number one?

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I'm Tony, this is my stepson, Nicholas.

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We're from Rainworth, in Nottinghamshire.

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Couple number two? I'm Mihir, I'm from Milton Keynes.

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This is my friend Ayman, from London.

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Couple number three?

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Hello, I'm Sean.

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This is my wife Jane and we are from Carrickfergus, Northern Ireland.

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And, finally, couple number four?

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Hello, I'm Sue.

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This is my friend Don and we are from Greetham in Rutland.

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And these are today's contestants.

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APPLAUSE

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Thanks very much, all of you. A very warm welcome to Pointless.

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We'll get to chat to each of you, of course, throughout the show, as it goes along.

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That just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

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Hounding out ignorance with a pitchfork and a flaming torch,

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a smile and a how-do-you-do, it's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

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Hiya! Hi, everybody.

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Afternoon.

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-Good afternoon to you.

-And to you.

-Two returning pairs on this show.

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They had very different shows last time.

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Ayman and Mihir got all the way through to the head-to-head.

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They were very good up until that point. They'll be tough to beat.

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Don and Sue, who got knocked out in Round One.

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-Don's come back on with a dog collar, you see.

-Yeah.

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-It's clever, isn't it?

-It's clever.

-Don't you think?

-Yeah.

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A little bit of divine intervention coming up for this show.

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And two new pairs, welcome to you.

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-A nice little jackpot building up, I would say.

-It is.

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-Round One, we're going well classy.

-Oh, yeah?

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-Yeah, totes classy, Round One.

-Excellent.

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Well, thank you very much.

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Susan and Joanna didn't win the jackpot last time,

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which means we add another £1,000 to it.

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So, today's jackpot starts off at £4,500.

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Look at that!

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If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

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I'm sure you know all this but I'm going to remind you anyway.

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The pair with the highest score at the end of each round will be eliminated.

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So, make sure you are not that pair.

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No conferring until we get to the head-to-head. Best of luck to all four pairs.

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Our first category today is...

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Shakespeare. Well classy.

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Shakespeare. Can you all decide, in your pairs, who's going first,

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who's going second.

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Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

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OK. The question concerns...

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Shakespeare plays in haiku.

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Excellent. Richard, wow.

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I know, right? Well sophisticated.

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We're going to give you seven clues to Shakespeare plays on each board.

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The clues are written in the form of a haiku,

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a poem with five syllables, seven syllables, five syllables.

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You just need to name the play. Seven on the first board, seven on the second.

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14 in all to have a go at at home. Very best of luck.

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There we are. Thank you very much. We are looking for the names of these Shakespeare plays,

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as described in these haikus.

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Here's our first board of seven. We have...

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I'll read those all one last time.

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There we are.

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Seven Shakespeare plays, summed up in haikus.

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Tony, welcome. Great to have you here from Nottinghamshire.

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-Thank you.

-What do you do, Tony?

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I'm a warehouse supervisor.

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What's in your warehouse?

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We sell electronic items - aerials, satellite dishes, security equipment.

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Right you are. And what do you like getting up to when not supervising the warehouse?

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I'm a member of the UK Pinball League.

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We meet around about once a month and basically play pinballs for a couple of hours.

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-On a sort of competitive basis, or is it fairly...?

-Yeah.

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It's fairly social? Have you got your own pinball machine?

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Not as yet, no.

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OK. But you sure play a mean pinball, I'm guessing?

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I try.

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Now, Tony, what about these haikus?

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Yeah, Shakespeare is not my finest thing.

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But I'm going to plump for the top one -

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the Prince of Denmark seeks revenge on his uncle, who murdered his dad -

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-and go for Hamlet.

-Hamlet, says Tony. Let's see if that's right.

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Let's see how many of our 100 people said Hamlet.

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Not bad, 46.

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APPLAUSE

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-46 for Hamlet.

-Well played.

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There's an early version of that printed, where it's,

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"To be or not to be, ay, there's the point".

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They think that this version was actually written by actors who were

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trying to write it down from memory.

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And they got it wrong. So Shakespeare's version is the real version.

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-Is the real version?

-And better.

-And better!

-Yeah.

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Thanks very much indeed. Ayman, welcome back.

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Remind us what you do, Ayman?

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I'm a tax consultant in London.

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And what do you like getting up to when you stop consulting on tax?

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In my spare time I like to swing dance

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and I participate in a lot of football betting.

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Just in your own terms? Or are you part of a syndicate?

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No, no, I just take a lot of time to research the football teams

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and place what I hope are winning bets.

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There we go.

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So, now, Ayman, what are you going to go for on this board?

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I'm not sure,

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but I think I'm going to go with - the Duke Prospero

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with his daughter Miranda, left on an island.

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And say Twelfth Night.

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Twelfth Night, says Ayman.

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Let's see if that's right, let's see how many of our 100 people said Twelfth Night.

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Bad luck.

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Different Duke. I'm afraid that scores you 100 points, sorry.

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Sorry, Ayman. I'll give all the correct answers at the end of the pass.

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Thanks very much indeed.

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Now, Sean, welcome to Pointless. Here from Carrickfergus!

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-Indeed.

-Great to have you. What do you do, Sean?

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I'm a director of a lighting and rigging company.

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Theatrical lighting and rigging?

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Theatrical, concert, TV, film.

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What's the biggest rig you've been responsible for?

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A particularly big one recently

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was Sports Personality Of The Year in the SSE Arena, in Belfast.

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Wow! And do you tour around as well,

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or do you tend to be based in Northern Ireland?

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We do, we certainly put equipment out on tours.

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But I stay at home as much as possible.

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What do you think of our set-up here?

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Dazzling! Particularly from this angle.

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Yeah, can be. It can be.

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Those lights! You know what all these are called, don't you?

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-I do, yeah.

-There we are.

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Sean, what would you like to go for?

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I've got a really risky, a slightly risky and one that I know.

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I think this is the slightly risky one.

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I think that "All the world's a stage" comes from Midsummer Night's Dream.

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A Midsummer Night's Dream, Sean.

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Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

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I'm sorry.

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Oops. Another incorrect answer.

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But you're in good company. You're not alone up there on 100.

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-That's nice.

-And worth a risk, as well.

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I told you we shouldn't have gone classy. I told you.

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Thanks, Richard. Sue, welcome back.

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Remind us what you do, Sue.

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I'm a part-time gardener and I work at a school for autistic children.

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Very good indeed. So, part-time gardening,

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are you gardening for other people or part-time in your own garden?

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-Mostly for other people.

-Mostly for other people?

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Tell me about your school for autistic children.

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-What do you do there?

-I do the gardening, that's about it.

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They have a big sensory garden for the children.

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-Oh, lovely.

-Which consists mainly of plants that smell nice,

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and feel nice.

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-I tend those.

-That's nice.

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So lots of different areas, with slightly different themes?

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-Yes, that's right.

-Lovely, very nice indeed.

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Sue, what would you like to go for on this board?

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It's all yours. If you fancied it,

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you could go through it and fill in all our blanks.

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I think I'll just go for the one I maybe know.

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That's the moor of Venice, I think is possibly Othello.

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Othello, says Sue. Let's see if that's right and let's see how many of our 100 people said Othello.

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It's right.

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46 is our low score and you pass it.

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Look at that. 33.

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Best score of the round so far, Sue. Very well done indeed.

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Well played, Sue. I bet you know all of these apart from maybe one, knowing you.

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-Coriolanus.

-The great general?

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-Is the great general.

-It is, yes.

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That's the one I thought you weren't going to get, so I'm in trouble now.

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-That would have scored you two points.

-"All the world's a stage..."

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-is As You Like It.

-As You Like It. That would have scored you eight points.

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Two star-crossed lovers?

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-Romeo and Juliet.

-Romeo and Juliet.

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That would have scored 73, that's the biggest score.

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-The fat knight, Falstaff?

-Merry Wives Of Windsor.

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Merry Wives of Windsor. You'd better get this wrong.

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The Tempest.

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It is the Tempest. Very well done.

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22 points.

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APPLAUSE

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We're halfway through the round. Let's take a look at those scores. 33, Sue - very well done indeed.

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Sue and Don, aceing this round at this stage.

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Then we go up to 46, where we find Tony and Nick.

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And then 100 is where you will find Sean and Jane and Ayman and Mihir.

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We're going to come back down the line now.

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Can the second players please step up to the podium?

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OK. We're going to put seven more Shakespearean haikus up on the board,

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and here they come.

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I'm going to read those one last time.

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There we go. Don, welcome back.

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-That's just such a great getup, Don. I love that.

-Thank you.

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I love the green. Very nice indeed.

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Remind us what you do, Don?

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I'm a part-time vicar and a part-time electrical engineer.

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-And sometimes drummer?

-Sometimes drummer, yes.

-There we are.

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Your electrical engineering,

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you do that on an informal call-out basis, or are you part of...

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-I'm self-employed.

-Self-employed?

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-Freelance.

-Freelance.

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That's good. So you can service people and their electrical appliances at

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the same time, which is nice.

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A one-stop shop for all things beneficial.

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And what do you like doing when not drumming?

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I can't imagine there's a lot of time left. Not drumming, or...

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I do like long-distance walking.

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Lake District and things like that.

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I play bowls, ring bells.

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Do you? Very good indeed.

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Don, there you are, 33, brilliant answer from Sue in the first pass.

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What would you like to go for on this board?

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If you could happen to score 66 or less,

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you are definitely through to the next round.

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It's not my strongest subject, but I think

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the top one's Macbeth.

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Macbeth, says Don, for the Scottish play.

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Here is your red line. Get below that and you are through to Round Two.

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How many people said Macbeth?

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It's right.

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Look at that, through you go, Don.

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Very well done. 60, taking your total up to 93.

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Well played. The real Macbeth ruled for 17 years.

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Just slightly shorter than the play!

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XANDER CHUCKLES

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Thanks very much, Richard.

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Jane, welcome to the show.

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Good to have you here. What do you do, Jane?

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I've just recently gone back to work.

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I've been a stay-at-home mum for about the past eight years.

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A couple of months ago I got a job in my local service station as a

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-customer advisor.

-Nice to be back, nice to be back working?

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Love it. I love meeting all the customers, yes.

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That's good. What are your hobbies, Jane?

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Massive Eurovision fan.

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Are you? Well, being Irish, you've hosted it enough, haven't you?

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-Yeah, yeah.

-My goodness.

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Favourite act across the years?

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Bobbysocks. They were about 1986, I think they were,

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I think they were from Norway.

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They sang Let It Swing and Let It Rock And Roll.

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Bobbysocks. Did they win?

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-They won, yeah.

-Phew. Oh, phew.

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Now, Jane, you are joint highest scorers

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at this stage. We have a contest here.

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I know a couple here, but I should know them all.

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I'm going to have to go for the bottom one.

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A Midsummer Night's Dream?

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A Midsummer Night's Dream, for the donkey-headed man?

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No red line for you, but you have to go as far down this column as you

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possibly can. Let's see how many people said A Midsummer Night's Dream.

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38.

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Not bad. 138 is your total.

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It gives you a big chance. The Beatles once performed the mechanical play

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within a play from A Midsummer Night's Dream on ITV, in 1964

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to an audience of screaming teenage fans.

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XANDER LAUGHS

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-That, I would like to see.

-That's one of the weirdest things ever.

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Wow. Pyramus and Thisbe?

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-Yeah, and Ringo.

-And Ringo...

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Thanks very much indeed. Now, Mihir, welcome back.

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Remind us what it is you do?

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I'm a trainee financial adviser.

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How long before you're a fully fledged financial adviser?

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If all goes to plan, around two or three years.

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-It takes that long?

-Yeah.

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Wow. I see.

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And when not doing your financial advising, what thrills you, Mihir?

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I consume literally everything there is about football.

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I watch it, I play it - or used to play it - read about it, discuss it.

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I also like writing.

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Just writing about current affairs, social trends, stuff like that.

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There we are. Now, there's no getting away from it, Mihir,

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you have to score 37 or less.

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How do you reckon you are on Shakespeare, generally?

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I think I know two.

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One is quite risky.

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The other one, I'm pretty confident.

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But I think I may have to risk if I want to get below 38.

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So I'm going to go for a king and three lords, as Twelfth Night.

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OK, Twelfth Night, says Mihir.

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Here is your red line.

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If you get below that with Twelfth Night,

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you are through to the next round.

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Let's see if it's right. How many of our 100 people said Twelfth Night?

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I'm afraid not, Mihir.

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That scores you 100 points and takes your total up to 200.

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But it's nice to join the 200 club, both with the same answer.

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It just makes...

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it makes the journey home slightly easier, doesn't it?

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Thanks very much indeed. Now then, Nick.

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Welcome to Pointless.

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Good to have you here. Here with your stepdad.

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Whose idea was it to come on?

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-It was Tony's.

-Tony's. And you were the obvious person for him?

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-Obviously.

-The obvious team-mate.

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Listen, really good news for you, you are through to the next round.

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It doesn't matter what you score.

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-What do you do, Nick?

-I'm a night shift manager at a fast food restaurant.

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Wow. How popular is the fast food restaurant?

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It's very popular.

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But night-time, slightly quieter than it is during the daytime?

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-Yeah.

-Or are they slightly more tricky customers at night-time?

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They can be, but it's usually all right.

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-It's nice.

-It's OK, nothing too fruity happening?

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Yeah, should be in bed right now.

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Very good.

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Nick, as I say, it doesn't matter what you score here.

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If you wanted,

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you could go through the board and fill in all our blanks for us.

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The two that I wanted have already gone. I have no idea.

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Well, it's a funny one, probably not right -

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Roman leader gets stabbed in the back by friends -

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who needs friends like that? Gladiator?

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OK. Gladiator.

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No red line for you.

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You are already through.

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Let's see what happens when we say Gladiator.

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LAUGHTER

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Bad luck. Incorrect, there.

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It scores you 100 points and takes your total up to 146.

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But you're through anyway. 146 isn't bad.

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Yeah, sorry, have you seen that new sitcom where David Mitchell plays Shakespeare?

0:17:130:17:17

Russell Upstart Crow?

0:17:170:17:18

XANDER CHUCKLES

0:17:180:17:20

That's a Gladiator joke.

0:17:200:17:22

I've only had a second to think of it!

0:17:220:17:24

Now, Mihir, what was the risky one,

0:17:240:17:26

what was the other one you were going to go for, the safer one?

0:17:260:17:28

The Roman leader, Julius Caesar.

0:17:280:17:30

Julius Caesar is right.

0:17:300:17:32

It would have scored you 37 points.

0:17:320:17:34

AUDIENCE GROANS

0:17:340:17:37

So sorry. The king and three lords who swear to avoid women?

0:17:370:17:41

-Love's Labour's Lost.

-It is Love's Labour's Lost.

0:17:410:17:44

-Very well done.

-It would have scored you two points.

0:17:440:17:46

-The elderly king?

-King Lear.

-King Lear.

0:17:460:17:48

25 points. The high school comedy?

0:17:480:17:50

-Taming Of The Shrew.

-Based on Taming Of The Shrew.

0:17:500:17:53

-Would have scored nine.

-And the merry war?

0:17:530:17:55

-Much Ado About Nothing.

-Much Ado About Nothing.

0:17:550:17:57

Would have scored you six points.

0:17:570:17:58

So, Love's Labour's Lost is the best answer there.

0:17:580:18:01

-Well done if you said that.

-Thank you very much indeed.

0:18:010:18:03

At the end of our first round, the pair who are heading home with their

0:18:030:18:06

high score of 200, Mihir and Ayman, I'm so sorry.

0:18:060:18:09

Last time you were in our head-to-head and I thought you were absolutely

0:18:090:18:12

set for the final this time. I'm afraid it wasn't to be.

0:18:120:18:15

It's been great having you on both shows. Thank you so much for playing. Mihir and Ayman.

0:18:150:18:18

But, for the remaining three pairs, it is now time for Round Two.

0:18:230:18:26

There we are, down to three pairs.

0:18:310:18:33

At the end of this round, obviously we will be down to two pairs.

0:18:330:18:36

Very, very best of luck to all three pairs for Round Two.

0:18:360:18:38

Today, our Round Two category is...

0:18:380:18:41

Oscar winners.

0:18:420:18:44

Can you all decide who's going first, who's going second?

0:18:440:18:46

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

0:18:480:18:50

OK, the question concerns...

0:18:530:18:56

-Richard?

-We're going to show you 16 pictures now of actors

0:19:010:19:04

who've won either the Best Actor or Best Actress at the Oscars.

0:19:040:19:07

You just need to tell us who they are, please.

0:19:070:19:10

Thank you very much indeed. We're going to show this image.

0:19:100:19:12

It won't change halfway through the round, this will stay up for the entire round.

0:19:120:19:16

You just have to name anyone who appears on this image.

0:19:160:19:19

So, let's reveal the image, and here it is.

0:19:190:19:21

There we are.

0:19:260:19:27

Nick?

0:19:290:19:31

Um...

0:19:310:19:33

I'm going to go with...

0:19:350:19:37

-Dustin Hoffman.

-Dustin Hoffman, says Nick.

0:19:400:19:43

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Dustin Hoffman?

0:19:430:19:47

Is right.

0:19:490:19:51

47, not bad.

0:19:540:19:56

He won best actor twice for Kramer vs Kramer and Rain Man.

0:19:580:20:01

He used to share a flat with Gene Hackman.

0:20:010:20:04

That's quite cool, before they were famous.

0:20:040:20:06

-Hoffman and Hackman.

-Hoffman and Hackman!

0:20:060:20:08

-What about that?

-Yeah. Ring top bell.

0:20:080:20:11

Thanks very much indeed.

0:20:110:20:12

Jane, who would you like to go for?

0:20:120:20:14

I know quite a few.

0:20:140:20:16

I'm trying to think which would be the least.

0:20:160:20:20

It's a bit risky.

0:20:200:20:22

I'm going to go for Sissy Spacek.

0:20:220:20:24

Sissy Spacek, says Jane.

0:20:240:20:26

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Sissy Spacek.

0:20:260:20:29

It's right.

0:20:310:20:33

47 was our only score at this point and you fly past that.

0:20:330:20:36

Sissy Spacek scores you eight.

0:20:360:20:39

There we go, Jane. Well done.

0:20:390:20:40

Great answer, Jane. Well played.

0:20:440:20:46

Sissy Spacek. Won for Coal Miner's Daughter.

0:20:460:20:49

Thanks very much, Richard.

0:20:490:20:51

Don?

0:20:510:20:52

Yes, third row down,

0:20:520:20:55

I think, second in, is Meryl Streep.

0:20:550:20:59

Meryl Streep, says Don.

0:20:590:21:00

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Meryl Streep.

0:21:000:21:03

It's right. 47 is our highest score.

0:21:060:21:09

Eight our low.

0:21:090:21:10

We passed 47.

0:21:100:21:12

40 for Meryl Streep.

0:21:120:21:13

The most nominated actress in Oscars history and won two Best Actress

0:21:160:21:19

Oscars for Sophie's Choice and for The Iron Lady.

0:21:190:21:22

Thanks very much. Well, we're halfway through the round.

0:21:220:21:24

Let's look at those scores. Eight, the best score of the pass.

0:21:240:21:26

Jane, very well done indeed.

0:21:260:21:28

Jane and Sean, absolutely on top of this round.

0:21:280:21:30

Then up to 40s where we find Don and Sue.

0:21:300:21:32

And then just up a little to 47 is where we find Nick and Tony.

0:21:320:21:36

Tony, you're not too far ahead, but you are ahead.

0:21:360:21:38

So we need a nice score from you. Good luck with that.

0:21:380:21:41

We're going to come back down the line now.

0:21:410:21:43

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

0:21:430:21:45

OK. Sue, what would you like to go for?

0:21:480:21:51

Top row,

0:21:530:21:55

Humphrey Bogart.

0:21:550:21:57

Humphrey Bogart, says Sue.

0:21:570:21:59

Ideally, you'd score six or less with that,

0:21:590:22:01

but there is your red line.

0:22:010:22:03

Getting anywhere near that, you should be in with a shout, anyway.

0:22:030:22:06

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Humphrey Bogart.

0:22:060:22:09

46 for Humphrey Bogart, taking your total up to 86.

0:22:160:22:21

Won an Oscar in 1951 for The African Queen.

0:22:210:22:23

He was also named American Film Institute

0:22:230:22:26

greatest male star of all time.

0:22:260:22:28

Though in 1949, he also won an award for least cooperative actor.

0:22:280:22:31

Sean, what would you like to go for?

0:22:340:22:37

If you can score 77 or less, you are through.

0:22:370:22:40

I'm going to go for one which is fairly obvious,

0:22:400:22:43

but hopefully will get me there.

0:22:430:22:45

-I'm going to go for Halle Berry.

-Halle Berry, says Sean.

0:22:450:22:47

Here is your red line.

0:22:470:22:49

Get below that with Halle Berry and you're into the head-to-head.

0:22:490:22:52

How many of our 100 people said Halle Berry?

0:22:520:22:54

It's right and you are through to the head-to-head.

0:22:570:22:59

Very well done, Sean. Down it goes.

0:22:590:23:01

Not bad, 38.

0:23:010:23:03

-46 is your total.

-Well played, Sean.

0:23:050:23:07

Won in 2001 for Monster's Ball.

0:23:070:23:09

Thank you, Richard.

0:23:090:23:11

Now then, Tony, we need a score of 38 or less from you.

0:23:110:23:16

I know a fair few of them.

0:23:190:23:20

But one that's going to be below 38...

0:23:200:23:23

Er...

0:23:230:23:24

I think that...

0:23:240:23:27

I think that's OJ Simpson on the bottom.

0:23:270:23:29

OK, OJ Simpson, says Tony.

0:23:290:23:33

No, it's not.

0:23:330:23:34

Here is your red line.

0:23:340:23:37

Let's see what happens when we say OJ Simpson.

0:23:390:23:41

I'm afraid no. An incorrect answer scores you 100 points.

0:23:460:23:50

Takes your total up to 147.

0:23:500:23:52

-Sorry, Tony.

-He has never won an Oscar.

0:23:520:23:54

A lot of people say he's an incredible actor.

0:23:540:23:57

LAUGHTER

0:23:570:23:58

But absolutely my favourite actor of all time there on the bottom row,

0:23:580:24:01

Denzel Washington. Would have scored you 13 points.

0:24:010:24:04

Won for Training Day.

0:24:040:24:06

-Now, top left?

-Emma Thompson.

0:24:060:24:07

Emma Thompson would have scored you 27. Next to Humphrey Bogart?

0:24:070:24:11

-Maggie Smith.

-Maggie Smith would have scored you 32.

0:24:110:24:14

Now, on that second row, recognise the black and white one?

0:24:140:24:17

-It's Alec Guinness.

-I'm seeing a little bit of Alec, yeah.

0:24:180:24:21

Would have scored you 23 points.

0:24:210:24:23

Next to him, the 2015 winner?

0:24:230:24:24

-Leonardo DiCaprio.

-Leonardo DiCaprio.

0:24:240:24:26

Would have scored you 46.

0:24:260:24:28

-Next to Leo?

-Is that Audrey Hepburn?

0:24:280:24:30

-It is Audrey Hepburn.

-Would have scored you 31 points.

0:24:300:24:33

Now, another 2015 winner, would have scored you one point, the third row.

0:24:330:24:37

Won for Room, Brie Larson.

0:24:370:24:39

Would have scored you one point.

0:24:390:24:41

-Next to Meryl Streep?

-Is Robert De Niro.

0:24:410:24:43

Robert De Niro would have scored you 28.

0:24:430:24:45

Now, a pointless answer.

0:24:450:24:47

Do your remember what he won for?

0:24:470:24:49

That's the French actor who won for The Artist.

0:24:490:24:52

-Jean...

-Dujardin!

0:24:520:24:54

Very well done if you said that, a pointless answer.

0:24:540:24:57

Terrific stuff. Then Greer Garson, well done if you said Greer Garson.

0:24:570:25:01

One point. And Tom Hanks, a big scorer, 57.

0:25:010:25:04

Excellent. Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

0:25:040:25:07

At the end of the second round, the pair that we have to say goodbye to

0:25:070:25:09

with their high score of 147, Tony and Nick.

0:25:090:25:12

I'm afraid it is you, but we will see you again next time and I'm sure

0:25:120:25:14

-we'll go much further. Meantime, thanks very much, Tony and Nick.

-Thank you.

0:25:140:25:18

But for the remaining two pairs, it's now time for our head-to-head.

0:25:210:25:24

Congratulations, Don and Sue, Sean and Jane.

0:25:290:25:31

You are now one step closer to the final and a chance to play for our

0:25:310:25:34

jackpot, which currently stands at

0:25:340:25:36

£4,500.

0:25:360:25:38

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

0:25:380:25:40

Well, we've reached the head-to-head,

0:25:400:25:42

which means from now on you are allowed to confer before you give your answers, which is nice.

0:25:420:25:46

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for that jackpot,

0:25:460:25:49

so best of luck to both pairs. Let's play the head-to-head.

0:25:490:25:51

Here's your first question.

0:25:570:25:59

And it concerns...

0:25:590:26:02

LAUGHTER

0:26:030:26:05

-Richard?

-Yeah, we're going to give you five clues, now, to facts about the county of Suffolk.

0:26:050:26:10

That's nice. There we are.

0:26:100:26:12

The county of Suffolk. So, let's reveal our five facts.

0:26:120:26:15

Let's not hold back. Here they come.

0:26:150:26:17

We have got...

0:26:170:26:19

I shall read those all one last time.

0:26:420:26:44

There we are. Don and Sue will go first.

0:27:080:27:11

We'll go for the football question.

0:27:140:27:19

We think it's Ipswich.

0:27:190:27:21

Ipswich Town, say Don and Sue. Ipswich. Now, Sean and Jane,

0:27:210:27:26

do you fancy talking us through the rest of that board?

0:27:260:27:29

We're just thankful that they went for that,

0:27:290:27:31

because they didn't take the only one that we think we know.

0:27:310:27:34

Which is the Animal Farm author, which was George Orwell.

0:27:340:27:38

So you're going to go for the River Orwell?

0:27:380:27:41

So, we have Ipswich Town and George Orwell.

0:27:410:27:44

Ipswich town, let's see. Is that right? How many people said Ipswich Town?

0:27:440:27:48

Is right.

0:27:500:27:51

Come on, come on.

0:27:530:27:55

35.

0:27:550:27:57

The Animal Farm author, George Orwell, says Sean and Jane.

0:28:010:28:04

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many of our 100 people said George Orwell.

0:28:040:28:08

It's right.

0:28:100:28:12

Not bad at all.

0:28:140:28:16

48 for Orwell.

0:28:160:28:17

That means Don and Sue, after one question, you are up 1-0.

0:28:190:28:22

Yeah, Ipswich Town, 35, George Orwell, 48.

0:28:220:28:24

Sounds like the weirdest football result of all time.

0:28:240:28:27

The Anglo-Saxon ship burial site?

0:28:270:28:30

-Sutton Hoo.

-Really worth visiting, as well.

0:28:300:28:32

It's a fascinating place. 19 points for that.

0:28:320:28:34

The Dodie Smith novel?

0:28:340:28:36

I Capture The Castle.

0:28:360:28:38

Oh, I'm glad I didn't say what I nearly said.

0:28:380:28:40

-Would have scored six points. I know what you were going to say.

-Yeah.

0:28:400:28:43

And the artist is?

0:28:430:28:44

-Constable.

-John Constable.

0:28:440:28:46

That would have scored 25.

0:28:460:28:48

The best answer on the board is I Capture The Castle.

0:28:480:28:51

Thank you very much indeed. So, here is your second question.

0:28:510:28:54

Sean and Jane, you get to answer it first,

0:28:540:28:56

but you have to win this one to stay in the game. Very best of luck.

0:28:560:28:59

A little bit of pressure on you there.

0:28:590:29:01

Our second round question is all about...

0:29:010:29:03

-Colourful creatures, Richard?

-We are going to show you five pictures now of colourful creatures.

0:29:050:29:09

Can you tell us what they are, please?

0:29:090:29:11

OK, let's reveal our five colourful creatures. Here they come.

0:29:110:29:14

There we are.

0:29:460:29:48

Sean and Jane, you will go first.

0:29:480:29:50

The blue poison dart frog?

0:29:500:29:51

Yeah, OK.

0:29:510:29:53

Or clownfish?

0:29:530:29:55

OK, we are going to go for E

0:29:550:29:58

and say blue poison dart frog.

0:29:580:30:01

Blue poison dart frog, say Sean and Jane.

0:30:010:30:05

Now then, Don and Sue, do you fancy talking us through the others?

0:30:050:30:09

The first one is a...clownfish.

0:30:100:30:16

Second one's a peacock.

0:30:160:30:17

D, we'll go for, is mandrill.

0:30:190:30:22

OK, mandrill. So, we have blue poison dart frog and mandrill.

0:30:220:30:27

Sean and Jane, blue poison dart frog.

0:30:270:30:29

How many of our 100 people went for that?

0:30:290:30:31

That's a good answer. Look at that, ten.

0:30:390:30:41

Very well done indeed. Ten for blue poison dart frog.

0:30:410:30:44

Don and Sue, meanwhile, have gone for mandrill, for D.

0:30:470:30:50

Let's see if that's right,

0:30:500:30:52

let's see how many of our 100 people said mandrill.

0:30:520:30:54

41.

0:31:010:31:03

Well done, Sean and Jane. That's exactly what we needed from you.

0:31:050:31:08

You're back in the game. After two questions, it's 1-1.

0:31:080:31:10

Very nicely done. One of those ones where you can work it out by the

0:31:100:31:13

letters, that's the only thing it can be.

0:31:130:31:15

There's lots of different poison dart frogs,

0:31:150:31:17

different colours, depending on their habitat.

0:31:170:31:19

You've got to wonder where the blue one lives.

0:31:190:31:21

-In the sky?

-No, because they're not cam...

0:31:210:31:23

It's the exact opposite of camouflage.

0:31:230:31:25

They make themselves stand out, in order to be terrifying.

0:31:250:31:28

-Oh, I see.

-Do you see?

-Clever.

0:31:290:31:31

A is, of course, the clownfish.

0:31:310:31:33

That would have scored you 49.

0:31:330:31:34

B, what do you think B would have scored?

0:31:340:31:36

It is a peacock.

0:31:360:31:38

You've got to imagine it would be in the 90s?

0:31:380:31:40

96?

0:31:400:31:42

96 is exactly right.

0:31:420:31:43

Very well done.

0:31:430:31:46

There are four people going, no...

0:31:460:31:48

I've seen one, I know I've seen one.

0:31:480:31:51

Some sort of horse, I know that.

0:31:520:31:54

A shire horse?

0:31:540:31:56

The best answer is C.

0:31:560:31:58

It's lilac-breasted, that we know.

0:31:580:32:00

It's a lilac-breasted roller.

0:32:000:32:02

It would've scored you three points.

0:32:020:32:04

Thank you very much indeed. It all comes down to a third question.

0:32:040:32:07

This is our decider.

0:32:070:32:09

Whoever wins this one goes through to the final and plays for that

0:32:090:32:11

colossal jackpot. Very best of luck to both pairs.

0:32:110:32:14

Our third question today is all about...

0:32:140:32:17

-Richard?

-We are now going to show you five anagrams

0:32:200:32:23

of different types of tea. Can you give us the most obscure answer?

0:32:230:32:26

Very best of luck, both teams.

0:32:260:32:28

OK, let's reveal our five anagrams, and here they come.

0:32:280:32:31

We've got...

0:32:310:32:32

I shall read those all one last time.

0:32:390:32:41

Don and Sue will go first.

0:32:470:32:50

-DON:

-Anything?

0:32:540:32:57

The last one is green.

0:32:570:32:59

It's the only one I know.

0:33:010:33:03

The last one is the only one we can recognise immediately.

0:33:030:33:05

-It's green.

-OK, you're going to go for green?

0:33:050:33:08

Now then, Sean and Jane, what are you going to go for on this board?

0:33:080:33:12

We think we know a few of them.

0:33:120:33:15

We think the top one's English Breakfast.

0:33:150:33:17

The second is redbush.

0:33:170:33:20

The fourth one down is Darjeeling.

0:33:200:33:22

-Redbush?

-Redbush.

0:33:220:33:24

OK, redbush.

0:33:240:33:26

We have green and we have redbush.

0:33:260:33:29

Don and Sue said green. Let's see how many of our 100 people got that from genre.

0:33:290:33:32

It's right.

0:33:350:33:37

61 for green.

0:33:390:33:40

Sean and Jane, meanwhile, have gone for redbush.

0:33:430:33:46

Let's see if that's right from brushed. Let's see how many people got it.

0:33:460:33:49

It's right.

0:33:510:33:53

And it wins you the point, very well done indeed.

0:33:540:33:56

Look at that. Down it goes to 24.

0:33:560:33:58

But, most importantly of all, it wins you that point.

0:33:580:34:01

And, Sean and Jane, sees you through to the final, 2-1.

0:34:010:34:04

Yeah, it's great work and you took us through the rest of the board very nicely,

0:34:040:34:08

apart from the one that was almost literally impossible, which we will get to.

0:34:080:34:11

English Breakfast up the top there, quite a low scorer.

0:34:110:34:15

That would have scored you 13 points.

0:34:150:34:17

An elder jig is Darjeeling.

0:34:170:34:20

That would have scored you 20.

0:34:210:34:23

Now, if you haven't heard of this tea, very good luck getting the anagram.

0:34:230:34:27

It is...Russian Caravan.

0:34:270:34:30

That was a pointless answer, unsurprisingly.

0:34:300:34:34

It sounds delicious, doesn't it?

0:34:340:34:36

Mm-mm...

0:34:360:34:37

It has the aroma of the inside of a Russian caravan.

0:34:370:34:40

That's where it comes from.

0:34:400:34:42

Imagine getting stuck behind a Russian caravan, their roads are so long.

0:34:420:34:46

-Imagine being in Moscow and having to go to Vladivostok and getting stuck behind a caravan.

-Oh!

0:34:460:34:50

And all you've got is the smell of slightly off tea

0:34:500:34:54

just wafting towards you.

0:34:540:34:56

Thank you very much indeed.

0:34:580:34:59

So, the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round, I'm afraid, Don and Sue, it is you.

0:34:590:35:03

You've triumphed across this show. It's been absolutely wonderful to watch.

0:35:030:35:06

It was Round One we had to say goodbye last time.

0:35:060:35:08

This time, we've had the pleasure of your company up to the head-to-head.

0:35:080:35:11

I thought it might have gone one step further. I'm afraid this is where we say goodbye.

0:35:110:35:15

Thank you so much for playing, Don and Sue.

0:35:150:35:17

But for Sean and Jane, it's now time for our Pointless final.

0:35:210:35:23

Well, congratulations, Sean and Jane,

0:35:270:35:28

you have seen off all the competition and won our coveted Pointless trophy.

0:35:280:35:33

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

0:35:380:35:41

At the end of today's show, the jackpot is standing at £4,500.

0:35:410:35:45

Well, what about that? Fantastic performance in the head-to-head.

0:35:480:35:52

I wonder, Sean, when you gave your first answer on the show,

0:35:520:35:54

A Midsummer Night's Dream, scoring 100 points,

0:35:540:35:57

did you foresee that you'd be standing here?

0:35:570:36:00

-I kind of knew Jane was going to save me.

-Oh, really?

-Yeah.

0:36:000:36:03

Listen, one pointless answer away from winning a really nice jackpot.

0:36:040:36:08

As you know, you have to choose a category from four that will appear on the board behind me.

0:36:080:36:12

They're not always very appealing when you first see them.

0:36:120:36:14

But there's usually something in there you can have a good go at.

0:36:140:36:17

Let's hope there's something on the board you like the look of today.

0:36:170:36:20

Today's selection is this...

0:36:200:36:23

Definitely not the last two.

0:36:320:36:34

US crime writers or modern female singers?

0:36:360:36:39

-Modern female... Modern female singers?

-Yeah.

0:36:400:36:43

We're going to go for modern female singers.

0:36:430:36:46

Modern female singers it is.

0:36:460:36:47

Very best of luck. We're looking for any UK Top 40 singles,

0:36:470:36:51

according to the officialcharts.com company,

0:36:510:36:54

up to May 2016 by any of the following three, please.

0:36:540:36:57

Any UK Top 40 single by...

0:36:570:36:58

UK Top 40 singles by any of those three up to the end of May 2016.

0:37:050:37:09

-Best of luck.

-Thanks very much indeed.

0:37:090:37:11

As always, you've got up to one minute to come up with three answers,

0:37:110:37:14

and all you need to win that jackpot is for just one of those answers to

0:37:140:37:17

be pointless. Are you ready?

0:37:170:37:19

-Yeah.

-OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

0:37:190:37:22

There they are. Your time starts now.

0:37:220:37:24

OK, I only know The Climb and Wrecking Ball for Miley Cyrus.

0:37:240:37:28

-And they're both really well known.

-I'm wondering whether...

0:37:280:37:31

Do you remember the awful Pablow The Blowfish that she wrote for her pet

0:37:310:37:35

-blowfish that died?

-Was this Miley Cyrus?

-Yeah.

0:37:350:37:38

-I don't know if was a single.

-It wouldn't have been in the Top 40, would it?

0:37:380:37:42

-Do you know any Iggy Azalea?

-It went big on YouTube because people wanted to laugh at it.

0:37:420:37:46

-Do you know any Iggy Azalea?

-No.

-I don't, either.

0:37:460:37:48

And Rita Ora? What did she sing?

0:37:480:37:50

I've gone completely blank.

0:37:520:37:54

We're going to have to go for The Climb...

0:37:540:37:57

Think Miley Cyrus, when she was Hannah Montana?

0:37:570:38:01

-Yeah.

-Before she went...

0:38:010:38:03

What was that one?

0:38:030:38:05

Blurred Lines? Did she sing that one?

0:38:050:38:07

-Or was that just for an award ceremony?

-That was the awards thing, I think.

0:38:070:38:11

-The Climb...

-I think it was a Hannah Montana one?

0:38:110:38:13

Ten seconds left.

0:38:130:38:15

Oh...

0:38:150:38:16

What was it called?

0:38:190:38:20

I don't know. I don't know.

0:38:200:38:22

We're going to have to say that blowfish thing.

0:38:220:38:25

OK, I'm afraid that is your minute up, I'm sorry to say.

0:38:250:38:27

Let's have your three answers.

0:38:270:38:29

If you could say which category you're answering in.

0:38:290:38:31

We are going to pick Miley Cyrus for all three,

0:38:310:38:33

because we've blanked on the other two.

0:38:330:38:36

-We're going to say Wrecking Ball.

-Wrecking Ball.

0:38:360:38:39

-The Climb.

-The Climb.

0:38:390:38:41

And we're going to take a punt on Pablow The Blowfish.

0:38:410:38:43

Pablow the Blowfish?

0:38:430:38:45

Of those three, I know which one I think is the best,

0:38:450:38:49

but which gives you your best shot at a pointless answer?

0:38:490:38:52

I think Pablow.

0:38:520:38:54

-Pablow goes last.

-The least would be Wrecking Ball.

0:38:540:38:57

Wrecking Ball. And The Climb in the middle.

0:38:570:38:59

Let's put those answers up on the board in that order, then.

0:38:590:39:02

Here they are.

0:39:020:39:04

We've got Wrecking Ball, we've got The Climb and we've got

0:39:040:39:07

Pablow The Blowfish.

0:39:070:39:09

Well, very, very best of luck.

0:39:090:39:11

Three wonderful answers on the board, there.

0:39:110:39:13

What if one of those turns out to be pointless and wins you the jackpot?

0:39:130:39:16

4,500 quid, not a bad thing to be taking home.

0:39:160:39:19

Sean, what would you like to do with that?

0:39:190:39:21

I'm a bit motorcycle mad, so I'd

0:39:210:39:24

like to be looking at a new motocross bike.

0:39:240:39:27

Very good. Jane, how about you?

0:39:270:39:29

I just want to take the children to Harry Potter Studios.

0:39:290:39:32

Lovely. OK. Very best of luck. As I say, three good answers there.

0:39:320:39:37

You never know, one of them might turn out to be pointless.

0:39:370:39:39

Our first answer today is Wrecking Ball.

0:39:390:39:42

In this case, in fact, in all three cases,

0:39:420:39:44

we are looking for Miley Cyrus UK Top 40 singles.

0:39:440:39:47

If this is right and if it's pointless, it will win you £4,500.

0:39:470:39:50

How many people said Wrecking Ball?

0:39:500:39:52

It's right.

0:39:560:39:58

It just has to go down to zero now for you to leave with that jackpot of £4,500.

0:39:580:40:02

Wrecking Ball takes us down through the 30s.

0:40:020:40:04

36. There we are.

0:40:040:40:06

You knew that was going to be a big scorer.

0:40:060:40:09

But we move onto slightly less certain territory

0:40:090:40:13

with your next answer, The Climb.

0:40:130:40:16

Again, a Miley Cyrus UK Top 40 single is what we were looking for.

0:40:160:40:20

You've gone for The Climb. If it's pointless, it wins you £4,500.

0:40:200:40:23

Let's see how money people said it. The Climb.

0:40:230:40:25

It's also correct. Wrecking Ball took us down to 36.

0:40:290:40:32

The Climb takes us through the 40s, through the 30s, passes 36,

0:40:320:40:36

down through the 20s. Into the teens.

0:40:360:40:38

Into single figures, down it goes.

0:40:380:40:40

The Climb!

0:40:400:40:42

That's exciting.

0:40:420:40:43

Two people mentioned The Climb.

0:40:480:40:50

So, not a pointless answer.

0:40:510:40:53

Which means we move onto your third and final answer, my favourite answer,

0:40:530:40:56

Pablow The Blowfish.

0:40:560:40:57

This could go one of two ways, I suspect.

0:40:570:40:59

If it goes the way we would like it to go, though,

0:41:010:41:03

it has every chance of going right down to the bottom of the column.

0:41:030:41:07

Let's find out. We are looking for Miley Cyrus, UK Top 40 singles.

0:41:070:41:10

If this goes down to zero, it will win you £4,500.

0:41:100:41:14

How many people said Pablow The Blowfish, is it pointless?

0:41:140:41:18

Oh, no!

0:41:220:41:23

Bad luck. That was the other way it could go, I'm afraid.

0:41:250:41:27

And it did.

0:41:290:41:31

Listen, one very good answer in there,

0:41:310:41:33

The Climb took us within touching distance of a pointless answer.

0:41:330:41:37

I'm afraid you didn't manage to find that all-important pointless answer.

0:41:370:41:40

So, you don't win today's jackpot of £4,500.

0:41:400:41:43

That will roll over onto the next show.

0:41:430:41:45

But you've been fantastic,

0:41:450:41:46

just one appearance on the show and straight through to the final.

0:41:460:41:49

A lot to be proud of, there.

0:41:490:41:51

In recognition of that, you get a Pointless trophy to take home.

0:41:510:41:54

Very well done indeed. Sean and Jane. Fantastic.

0:41:540:41:57

APPLAUSE

0:41:570:41:58

Yeah, a valiant effort there.

0:42:000:42:02

I bet you didn't think when you were coming on the show you would choose

0:42:020:42:05

Miley Cyrus singles as your chosen category.

0:42:050:42:07

Terrific performance. Let's take a look at the pointless answers in the

0:42:070:42:10

different categories. We will start with Rita Ora.

0:42:100:42:13

Black Widow, a hit with Iggy Azalea,

0:42:130:42:15

although Iggy Azalea would have scored you one point for that.

0:42:150:42:18

It wasn't pointless for her. Doing It, with Charli XCX.

0:42:180:42:21

I Will Never Let You Down was a number one single.

0:42:210:42:24

Shine Ya Light. Also could have had Coming Home, Lay Down Your Weapons,

0:42:240:42:26

New York Raining and Radioactive.

0:42:260:42:28

All of those were pointless answers for Rita Ora.

0:42:280:42:31

Now, Miley Cyrus.

0:42:310:42:34

Can't Be Tamed, Feelin' Myself, with will.i.am and Wiz Khalifa.

0:42:340:42:37

Hoedown Throwdown.

0:42:370:42:39

Can't believe you didn't think of Hoedown Throwdown!

0:42:390:42:41

See You Again, also could have had 7 Things, Fall Down,

0:42:410:42:45

and We Can't Stop. And Iggy Azalea,

0:42:450:42:47

only two pointless answers for Iggy Azalea,

0:42:470:42:49

which were Bounce and Change Your Life.

0:42:490:42:52

Very well done if you got any of those at home.

0:42:520:42:55

Thanks very much.

0:42:550:42:56

Well, Sean and Jane very sadly didn't win our jackpot today,

0:42:560:42:59

which means it rolls over onto the next show when we will be playing

0:42:590:43:02

for £5,500.

0:43:020:43:04

Join us next time to see if someone can win it.

0:43:060:43:08

-Meantime, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

0:43:080:43:11

And it's goodbye from me, goodbye.

0:43:110:43:12

Quiz in which contestants try to score as few points as possible by plumbing the depths of their general knowledge to come up with the answers no-one else can think of. Presented by Alexander Armstrong and Richard Osman.


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