Adil Ray The TV That Made Me

-Telly.

-That magic box in the corner.

It gives us access to a million different worlds,

all from the comfort of our sofa.

'In this series I'm going to journey through the fantastic

'world of TV with some of our favourite celebrities.

'They've chosen the precious TV moments that shed light...'

Love this!

'She's beaten the panel.'

Look at that!

'..on the stories of their lives.'

Go on, Champion! Go on, Champion.

You're like, "Oh! Argh!"

'Some are funny...'

Oh, quite amazing, unbelievable!

No, no, no!

'..some are surprising.'

Paddington Bear.

'Some are inspiring...'

That's what kids should be doing now.

Lay a ten-pence piece on a table with a bit of sticky tape.

Look at that! Stonking!

'..and many...'

-Some turtles capsize...

-'..are deeply moving.'

I knew that we were in the presence of history.

I'm crying.

I broke down in tears at that.

'So come watch with us as we hand-pick the vintage telly that

'helped turn our much-loved stars into the people they are today.'

Welcome to The TV That Made Me.

My guest today is Birmingham's golden boy.

A radio and TV presenter as well as an award-winning writer and actor.

Adil Ray is best known as the loudmouthed Citizen Khan.

What?! Do you know who I am?

Hello! Mr Khan!

'The TV that made him includes a truly bonkers sitcom...'

Give us an easy one, Bambi!

'..a courtroom drama...'

I've paid for what I've done.

'..and a family that sticks together.'

We thank thee, oh Lord...

LAUGHTER

It can only be the one and only Adil Ray.

I think you should have been a pop star.

-IN AMERICAN ACCENT:

-Ladies and gentleman, presenting Adil Ray.

-Yeah, who knows, there's still time.

-Yeah, plenty of time.

-Could still be a pop star.

-Because you ARE very young.

Well, exactly! Only 19, yeah.

I'm saying nothing.

So, today is a celebration,

-a collection of TV shows that you have chosen.

-I know, it's great.

Shall we go back now to the early, early, early, early...

Such a long time ago.

This was what it was like growing up for the lovely Adil Ray.

'Adil Ray was born in Birmingham on 29th of April, 1974.

'The youngest of two boys,

'he shared his home with his dad, Abdul, a bus driver,

'and his mum, Nargus, who worked at the Immigration Appeals Department,

'assisting the city's ever-growing immigrant community.'

Adil, I'm going to take you back to those early days.

What are your earliest memories of TV, what is your first TV highlight?

I think of the kids' TV shows, that was the thing, growing up.

Anything from Grange Hill to Why Don't You? was great.

I used to love watching that, getting up on a Saturday morning before...

That's the thing, we used to get up really early as kids.

Why did we get up so early?

I was up at half six!

It's like I had a job to go to or something!

So, up at half six and breakfast is obviously not ready,

because your parents make your breakfast for you,

you're not allowed in the kitchen, right?

So, just watching TV until Mum and Dad wake up.

But it was great, it was that moment you had the house to yourself.

So watching all those kids' TV shows on a Saturday morning

was superb and I think Why Don't You? is the one for me that really

sticks out as being something that was almost an institution, really.

-Shall we have a look at it?

-Yeah, let's have a look.

-This is it.

# Why don't you?

# Why don't you? #

-It's all about the theme tune, isn't it?

-Do you know the words?

It comes up now, anyway!

Doesn't really make sense, does it?

"Why don't you switch off your TV set, but come and watch us!"

But it was great. And in a way, I think the theme was the best bit of the show.

I think there were gangs, weren't there?

-Wasn't there like the Cardiff gang and the Birmingham gang?

-Yeah.

I only remembered this recently, but Pauline Quirke was one of them.

You know that? Birds Of A Feather. She was in Why Don't You?

-She was one of the presenters.

-Yeah, yeah.

-Well, in this clip, we've got the Cardiff gang.

-Oh, the Cardiff gang.

Right, here you go.

Oh, er, hello, and welcome to Why Don't You? from Cardiff.

I'm Christian and here's the... Oh.

-This is riveting stuff.

-It is, isn't it?

Why not put it on now? This would be great.

-Oh, here they come!

-Here comes the Cardiff gang.

Here they come. And there's always someone in dungarees.

There's got to be someone in dungarees somewhere...

There you go, she's got dungarees on.

'Why Don't You? was an adult-free zone

'and each episode was presented by a different gang of kids.

'It was packed with school holiday ideas to tear young viewers

'away from their screens.

'Some of them better than others.'

I have to catch the coin between my thumbs.

Well done!

That's what kids should be doing now! Lay a ten-pence piece on a table

with a bit of sticky tape!

They don't know what they're missing, do they?

-All these computers, honestly!

-But you know you're going to

-pull off all the table if you take that tape away.

-Exactly.

'The programme was the unlikely TV break for writer Russell T Davies,

who cut his teeth on the show, weaving in the scripted comedy.

After chasing us from our screens with Why Don't You?

he went on to gluing us to them by reinventing Doctor Who.

We seem to forget now, but the great thing about watching

stuff like this is that now, you can watch retro shows up on iPlayer

or you have it recorded, you can watch it again.

But that would have been the only time you got to see that show.

That was the thing about it,

you are looking for a show that... This is OUR show!

No-one else's, this is our show.

It just felt quite like we owned it.

But at the time, children presenting, I suppose that was quite a fresh idea.

So, watching it you might have thought, "Do you know what? I can do this."

I suppose, yes. I wonder whether that was the first thing that occurred to me?

That actually, if they can do it, I can do it.

So did you ever make anything from the show?

Did anyone actually ever go, I tell you what I'm going to do now, I'm going to make that? No, they didn't!

It is the posh kids that do it.

-By the time you had emptied that bottle...

-Exactly!

-You know, you have lost the will to live!

-Exactly.

In our house, a fairy liquid bottle would last all year anyway!

And dad would just put water in it anyway.

So we would never get a new one so you would never have a spare one.

So let's talk about your house. What was it like?

We lived in a semidetached in a place called Yardley in Birmingham.

It was an interesting time for us

because we were like the only Asian family living in this very white area, you know.

It was tough at the beginning, I remember.

I think when we left the house 20 years later, all the neighbours were in tears, you know.

It was great because we were very close to our neighbours.

I like that! They're your neighbours!

We were very close to our neighbours, yes! In a semidetached.

But in our culture you never call anybody older than you by their name.

You'd always have to call them auntie or uncle.

So it turned out that because we were in this white area

I had Auntie Gladys and Uncle John living next door

and across the road was Auntie Betty and Uncle Arthur!

I always wondered why I never got birthday presents from them

because they were supposed to be my aunts and uncles!

Some TV gems hit our screens in 1984 when Adil was just 10,

including Ever Decreasing Circles,

with Richard Briers as neighbourhood busybody Martin Bryce.

Fresh from Not The Nine O'Clock News,

Mel Smith and Griff Rhys Jones launched their seminal sketch show,

Alas Smith and Jones.

And Fridays would never be the same again

as the fandabidozi Crackerjack closed its doors for the last time.

So what was your lounge? I'm thinking of the television room where you used to watch.

Yes, I mean in our house everything was governed by the TV.

All the chairs faced the TV.

7:00pm or 7:30pm in the evening, mum would get us our food and we would just...

On our laps in front of the telly.

And I remember my chair... For some reason, I got the short straw.

Everyone else was that we facing and my chair was a little bit...

But I was kind of a bit like this. So I was like that watching telly.

This is good, isn't it? This is great! I love this! Amazing!

We have made an effort with the apartment today.

-This is a classic David Shepler look.

-Oh, my God!

And I believe you had this in the lounge.

Yes. That was on the wall above the telly.

And what I love about that was that we found out, not found out,

we watched Only Fools And Horses

and Del Boy had one in his living room. There you go.

We were aspiring in our family, mate, you know what I mean? Trendsetters!

My mum and dad were mad for sitcoms on telly.

They just absolutely loved it.

I remember watching sitcoms with my family and going,

"This is one of those few moments in this mad house,

"at times, that we are,

"that we sit down together and enjoy something together."

Watching anything from Only Fools And Horses, Cheers,

to even slightly mediocre sitcoms from Never The Twain with Windsor Davies.

You know, great times.

We have got a classic Ray family sitcom here. This is Bread.

We thank Thee, oh Lord...

..for leading us safely through the night

and for the food we are about to belch.

It's great. It's brilliant. It's Carla Lane, isn't it? She is legendary.

Tremendous actors. Fantastic. However, it depresses me a little bit.

-Why?

-Because it came on on a Sunday and what does that mean?

-School.

-School the next day.

Do you know what I mean? It was like, I love this, but any minute now,

Mum's going to be like, "Get to bed and you haven't done your homework."

You know, sort of... So, it was a bit of a weird one, this.

Loved it but reminded me of a Sunday.

Carla Lane first created a family called Boswell

for Series 5 of the Liver Birds in the '70s.

A decade later,

she reinvented them as the ever-resourceful Boswells in Bread,

with Jean Boht heading up the crafty clan as Mum, Nellie.

Left me some, have you?

-Here she is!

-Hey.

HE DOES AN IMPRESSION OF AVELINE AND LAUGHS

-What do you want a bikini for?

-I'm modelling, aren't I?

-Look at that. What she's wearing.

-Brilliant.

The costume department had loads of fun on this..

-All right, I'll miss me bus.

-Have you seen her run for the bus?

Her dress comes up around her chin and by the time she gets on the bus,

she is all knickers and earrings.

-I mean, every one was a character.

-Well, that was it.

-They could all have their own sitcom.

-Exactly.

That was the great thing about it, such strong characters.

Great narrative as well.

I think, if I'm right, most sitcoms at the time were self-contained,

so you could watch an episode and you just followed one story

and next week, you would start up again.

Whereas this, I think it worked with cliff-hangers, it was almost

a drama in a way so you had to watch the next episode to find out.

So as well as being funny, it told a great story.

Well it was kind of Thatcher's Britain at the time, wasn't it?

And this sort of Liverpool family. That thing about...

Before they sat for dinner, wouldn't they all come in and give

Nellie the money they had earned and she would put it in the pot.

Had they earned it? Let's be honest!

Yeah, one or two of them, probably not!

Each episode saw the family fight to make a bob or two,

whether from slightly dodgy deals, the benefit system or even work.

Don't talk about it, Jack, just check it, buy and sell it,

put the money in the pot and shut your gob.

And Joey with his leather pants.

Oh, yeah, everyone's heart-throb was Joey.

-Exactly. Did you have some of those leather pants?

-No, I didn't.

-No, no.

-You only picked up the leather pants recently?

-From him.

It was at a party, I don't want to go into it.

I think, looking back at Bread now, it has probably influenced what I do

now because it was a Catholic family. A devout Catholic family but so much

humour involved in that community within the family, I think in

a way, it has probably inspired what I wanted to do with Citizen Khan.

Religion has always been a rich source of television comedy.

Derek Nimmo became famous for his clerical performances in

All Gas And Gaiters.

Oh, Brother!

Oh, Father!

And finally, Hell's Bells.

Thank heavens for Dawn French who starred as Geraldine,

the newly ordained Vicar of Dibley in 1994.

Dermot Morgan and Ardal O'Hanlon were brilliant as the exiled

priests of Craggy Island in Father Ted.

And in 2010, the lovely Tom Hollander

took on the role of the well-meaning Adam Smallbone in BBC Two's Rev.

-So, we are now moving on to Parents' Choice.

-Oh, yeah.

-Something your mum and dad used to like watching, and yourself.

-Yes.

Well, the thing that kind of sticks in my mind is Sunday mornings

and I can speak on behalf... I can be a community leader here

and speak on behalf of all Asian people of my generation, without question.

Sunday morning, the world stopped for British Asians because the BBC

came up with this wonderful idea to give us an hour of our own TV.

-Yes!

-Get in, you know?

And it was a show called Nai Zindagi, Naya Jeevan which means,

new way, new life, so it was literally...

It was-it was aimed at the immigrant community who had just

arrived in the '50s and '60s and it was fantastic. And a Sunday

morning memory for me is waking up in the morning and I can smell...

Cos Sunday mornings is when my mum would go to town for breakfast.

So we would really smell this gorgeous breakfast

and she'd make these things called pronta, which is like a chapatti

but with lots of butter on it.

A double-layered chapatti with loads of butter on it

and you have it with mango, pickle, with jam or something,

or have it with a fried egg, it is amazing.

So, Sunday mornings, I'd wake up and smell that,

it's great and you all come downstairs in your pyjamas

and you are just watching us on the telly, it was brilliant.

It was like, there's no white people!

There's no white people! That is us, that is my mum, that is my dad.

It was just-it was brilliant.

It was not as if I really was interested a lot myself.

My mum and dad would be, but we were glued to it

because it was literally Asian people on the telly, it was great.

Let's have a little look at this, shall we? Here it is.

Good morning.

-I can smell my mum's breakfast. I can smell it.

-Happy times?

-Oh, yeah,

-really happy times.

-What time would this be on?

Sunday morning maybe about 9.30, 10 o'clock in the morning, yeah.

Prime Minister Mrs Thatcher... West Kensington, London...

-Look at that tie, Rashid Ashraf, look at that.

-And that hairdo.

I reckon he has still got that. It's lovely, isn't it?

No autocue in those days.

No autocue, don't bother looking at the camera,

just read it off the paper.

The thing is, though, they could have been saying anything.

OK, so bring all your family over, we are here for another 50 years,

bed in, everybody, they haven't got a clue.

So, do you think it had... gave you a sense of belonging?

-I think so, yeah.

-It being on British television, you being British.

I think so. You can't underestimate the power of television, can you?

Back then. For young kids now, they probably don't realise how TV...

Because you can get it on your phone but TV for us was the thing,

it was what everyone watched.

17, 20 million viewers would watch the shows.

So I think to see your own community on that TV was kind of...

It was a big sort of endorsement and think, yeah, you've kind of arrived,

you are now on TV, so I think it meant quite a lot.

HE SPEAKS HIS OWN LANGUAGE

The BBC Immigration Unit, which later developed into

the BBC Asian Programmes Unit,

which I worked for for many years, but I look back now,

and you go, that sounds bizarre but it was probably right for the time.

The BBC has got this public service, sort of...you know,

requirement to broadcast to all communities

and I guess immigration was a big, hot topic at the time,

and it was a big new thing, so of course they needed something to watch on TV.

We are going to move on to a thing we like to call Just Because.

You used to watch it, just because.

OK.

GRANGE HILL THEME TUNE

-Amazing.

-Another classic.

Where is the bit, the sausage on the fork, where is it?

Oh, it's coming up, it's coming up.

Great theme tune as well.

THEY SING THE THEME TUNE

Here we go. There you go, look at that.

I used to have a radio show

and I would play this theme tune just for a laugh.

-I just loved it.

-Yeah.

-I just absolutely loved it.

THEY SING THE THEME TUNE

It is almost quite Indian, that last bit.

THEY SING THE THEME TUNE Maybe that's why I liked it.

-Come on, then.

-Just a minute.

-Tucker Jenkins.

-Tucker.

-Look at him.

-..and already you look a mess.

-I don't like wearing a tie.

-Can't help that.

-Why do I have to wear one?

-Because you do.

They did touch on some really serious subjects.

-Course they did, yeah.

-Talked about drugs.

-The whole Zammo...

Underage sex, you know, things like that.

The Zammo thing and the Just Say No was great,

but it was brilliant. But I always remembered little stories like...

Do you remember Roland? He was bullied a lot

-and there was this young black girl at the school...

-He was quite large?

Yeah, he was quite large and she was lovely,

but she'd just be like, "Roland, Roland,

"Why don't you talk to me, Roland?"

Oh, it was brilliant.

Such great characters and it really drew you in, and I think...

Phil Redmond, it's no wonder he went on to do things like Brookside,

absolutely brilliant storytelling.

For 30 years, Grange Hill was the most famous school on TV.

Its most controversial storyline came in 1986 with class clown

Zammo's heroin addiction.

It led to the top ten single Just Say No,

which proved they were much better actors than singers.

MUSIC: Just Say No by the cast of Grange Hill

# Just say no. #

Again, it's that show that you own as a kid, it is one of those...

It is meant for us, no-one else, parents can't watch this,

this is for us, this is our world.

You would get home from school and you would wait for Grange Hill.

I was always disappointed that it always felt really short.

I don't know why, I don't know whether it was 30 minutes, whether it was only 20...

And the fact...I think it was only on once a week.

-Was it only on once a week, yeah.

-"Another week!"

-Yeah.

Now then, shall I come along to school with you?

Enrolling at Grange Hill could lead to a glistening TV career as it

did for Todd Carty, who graduated to become Mark Fowler in EastEnders.

Michelle Gayle played Fiona Wilson,

and she too joined EastEnders as Hattie.

And Amanda Mealing, who played Tracey Edwards,

became Casualty's headstrong clinical lead Connie.

Now, some of the teachers in Grange Hill had bizarre nicknames,

-would you agree?

-Yes, if I can remember any of them.

I think you know what is coming,

-cos that is exactly what we are going to do.

-Oh, really?

Some of the names here are real and some of them are not.

Just answer true or false. Mr Stuart "Hoppy" Hopwood. True or false?

That is true, he was one of the earlier ones, Hopwood.

-The earlier days.

-You're an expert on Grange Hill.

-Mr Geoff "Bullet" Baxter.

-Ah, Geoff Baxter, the Bullet.

I know this because Michael Cronin who played him...

And this is sort of a bit of a homage,

Michael Cronin was a guest on Citizen Khan.

He played the mother-in-law's boyfriend who turned out to be

-gay in Series 2.

-So, that is how much you love Grange Hill.

-You were getting in actors...

-That is how much... That is what I do for people.

But it was a real buzz working on something. "Oh, my God, that's Mr Baxter."

"Where's your gym kit?"

-So was he The Bullet?

-He was The Bullet.

-Course he was.

Mr Keith "Crazy" Paving.

-Crazy paving.

-True or false?

-I think that is false.

-Is it?

-Hooray.

-OK.

Mrs Bridget "The Midget" McCluskey.

-Yeah, Bridget The Midget, that's true. McCluskey.

-Correct.

-Yeah.

Miss Terri "The Loony" Mooney.

-True or false?

-Terri "The Loony" Mooney.

I'm going to say false on that one.

-It's true.

-Is it true? I don't remember that one.

Mr Bill "Scruffy" McGuffey.

-Yeah, that's true.

-True, absolutely true.

Mr Dave "Pedigree" Chumford.

No, that's not true.

You are right, it's false.

Mr Nick "Smartarse" Smart.

No, that's not true.

-No, it is true.

-What?

-Yeah.

-Oh, OK.

BRIAN LAUGHS

Mr Maurice "Bronco" Bronson, true or false?

-That's definitely true.

-True?

-Yeah, definitely.

-OK.

-How strict was he, Bronco?

-Yeah.

With the 'tache. I wonder which historical figure he was based on?

You really know your stuff about Grange Hill.

-Or I didn't do any of my homework! And just watched TV instead.

-Exactly.

Talking of TV and never going to school,

when you were ill, this was the programme used to watch.

Oh, God, don't do this to me.

The Crown, represented by Mr Stephen Harvesty, alleged that Lannigan

bribed Ager to smuggle forbidden goods into the prison.

Crown Court could have been seen as an early form of reality TV.

The cases were fictional but the jurors were members of the public

deciding if the actor defendant was guilty or not.

Two outcomes had to be rehearsed for when the jury

delivered their verdict.

Oh.

Oh, no. HE COUGHS

I feel a bit ill. I'm just going to lie down here.

Oh, bless.

-What would you...

-Crown Court, my God.

This is supposed to make me feel better but it didn't.

I remember, whenever I was ill, and I am sure it is perfectly illegal,

but my mum would leave me at home on my own.

You are not supposed to do that, were you?

-It was a different era, wasn't it?

-Exactly, all different then.

So, she would leave me at home in front of the telly.

Now there's no kids' TV in the day, there's no CBeebies, no DVDs.

You were lucky if you had a VHS.

We had none of that, so you had to watch what was on.

And for some reason, Crown Court was the best thing for me at the time.

There is nothing about this that says, "Kids, watch this show."

But I'm going, "Yeah, I'll watch it."

Do you know why, because you were meant to be at school!

Exactly, everything was good as long as you were not at school.

-You are at present detained in her Majesty's Prison Parkmore.

-Yes, guv.

Course, everyone in the box always had a southern accent.

IN A COCKNEY ACCENT: Nothing but the truth, yeah.

-But look who it is, it's Bob Hoskins.

-Is it?

-What sort of things did you run?

-We used to run the book and we also...

-The book?

-Bookmaking, you know.

It is incredible how many distinguished actors came

-through Crown Court.

-Brilliant, brilliant.

-It really was...

-It was a learning ground for many of them.

-Yeah.

Do you know the two defendants in the dock?

-Well, one's a screw at Parkmore and the other one...

-Erm...

What did you say?

A screw, Your Lordship, a prison officer.

Crown Court wasn't exactly Hollywood but it did manage to attract

some names who became pretty huge stars

including the 12th Doctor Who, Peter Capaldi...

..Harry Potter star Zoe Wanamaker,

as well as Oscar winners Colin Firth

and the star of Gandhi and Iron Man 3, Ben Kingsley.

-Went straight, Mr D, or went soft?

-Leave off.

For me, it was either this, or my mum would leave a Bollywood movie on.

The great thing about Bollywood movies, they are about

four hours long, so my mum could leave for work at nine o'clock...

So you are telling me you had a VHS recorder.

Yeah, later in life, we did, we had a VHS...

She would put this Bollywood film on for four hours,

then she would go to work,

then she would come home at lunchtime to give me some beans on toast and

then put another Bollywood film on for four hours and come back at five.

So every time I watch a Bollywood film now, I start getting a bit sick.

You are like me, if you came home from school,

-Mum and Dad weren't there, I had that.

-Yeah.

What happened if you forgot your key?

Yeah, that would happen a lot, really.

That exactly happened to me.

Forgotten my key or Mum is not home, she is running late,

so I would have to go and knock on Auntie Betty's door.

They were called Auntie Betty and Uncle Arthur.

You know that thing of going to someone else's house.

"Oh, look, they've got carpet. Look, they've got...

"What TV have they got? Ours is better than theirs."

You have come round my house, I want to make you feel at home.

What you going to do?

This is something we found out, Uncle Brian's.

-Brilliant. Oh, my God, this is...

-Is it weak enough?

I haven't met Auntie Betty in many years and Auntie Betty,

if you are watching, I'm sorry.

But this is exactly what she would do, in a plastic cup

because I wasn't trusted with a glass so you have gone one better.

I would take the glass home or something, do you know what I mean.

-In those days, you got glasses for free from petrol stations.

-Yeah.

So I get this.

Mmm! BRIAN LAUGHS

What is it? It's not juice and it isn't water.

It's like she has put just a drop of orange in it, what is that about?

Tell me, is this a white English thing?

I mean, what is it? In our house is like, "Have it, come on,

"have some Coke, have another glass of Coke, one Vimto, Tango,

"have it all, blackcurrant Ribena."

Go to Auntie Betty's - "There you go, love, there you are.

"Another digestive as well, but can you share that with Stuart?"

What about this, what have we got here, we have got some crisps.

This is brilliant, this isn't an Auntie Betty thing, this is my thing.

-This is great.

-This is you?

-Yeah, this is what we would do.

This is you as a young kid or possibly a student?

Coming home from school, you are waiting for Mum to come home

and it is something I took to university with me as well.

This is a crisp sandwich, you cannot beat a crisp sandwich.

And you have to get these because what you have to do first is

put your fingers all over the crisps and find...

..that.

So, could you please tell our viewers

how to make a good crisp sarnie.

I don't know the logic of it because I don't know why you just

wouldn't buy ready salted crisps but there is something about it,

I guess it makes you feel creative, I don't know.

You can decide how much salt you want on. The first thing you do...

-The first thing you do...

-This is like Why Don't You, isn't it?

So, kids, what we're going to do... This is the Birmingham gang.

And what we are going to do is show you how to make a crisp sandwich.

What are we doing, Brian?

That's right, we are going to show you how to make a crisp sandwich.

-How to make a crisp sandwich.

-You are going to need crisps.

We need some crisps. And you need some salt.

And then what you do, you sprinkle the salt into the bag.

-Enjoy the moment.

-Enjoy that.

-Is that enough? BOTH:

-No.

Is that enough?

-BOTH:

-No.

-That's enough.

-Because it's empty.

Because it is empty now. And then you get the bag...

-This is very important.

-People forget this bit.

What you are going to say now?

They get this bit and they go, "Oh, why..."

You've got to do this, you've got to keep the top closed...

A bit of a shake, yeah, a bit of a shake and then,

-simply take out some crisps...

-Ah, so you are not actually pouring...

You take them out individually.

Take them out individually because the mess will get everywhere.

This is better than Bake Off, forget the Bake Off,

-this is where it is at.

-The mess will get everywhere.

-The great British Crisp Off.

-Important to arrange them?

-Arrange them, arrange them.

-And keep little ones underneath?

Just go for it, just go for it.

You've got to let yourself... Got to be a bit Jamie,

got to go a bit pukka, know what I mean?

-Give it some. Go a bit like that.

-Bit creative.

Like that. Then you do that and you do that, pucker.

I see what you are doing there, you are flattening it.

You've got to flatten and kind of give it a...

-Can I have a little feel?

-No, no, no, this is the rule, you see.

-Sorry.

You've got to make your own sandwich because you don't want

somebody else's fingers on your crisp sandwich. That's not right.

-Thank you very much.

-Do you cut it?

-Yes, of course you cut it, yeah.

Of course you cut it.

I know people like to do the triangle thing. I think that is how the

Queen has it but I like to do proper Birmingham-style, there you go.

There you go, you do that, there you go, that's it, perfect.

-You can have one of those.

-I'll have that.

-Lovely.

Cheers, everyone.

Now, while we are eating this, let's have a look at the Young Ones.

Hello and welcome to another edition of University Challenge.

University Challenge.

So, starter for ten, fingers on the buzzers.

Who is the richest person in the world?

-BUZZER

-Scumbag, Vyvyan.

What?

Look at this cast, though, it is the whole Footlights crew, isn't it?

This is brilliant. I love it when they start kicking it down.

I am completely bloody sick of this.

Give us some easy ones, Bambi, you big bottom boil!

Relax, we can handle this. Vyvyan.

Achtung!

-BUZZER

-It's not an automatic?

EXPLOSION

My mum knew that I liked this show called The Young Ones.

I think to this day, she probably thinks it's a nice little Muppet Show

or something cartoony.

But she let me have my own portable TV in my room

so I could watch The Young Ones.

Cos I used to say to her, "I want to watch The Young Ones."

She'd say, "No, you can't, I'm watching this.

-But she gave me my own TV.

-So you'd have been about...

-About 10 years old?

-I suspect so, yeah.

Ten years old and allowed...

-So for a ten-year-old, this was...

-It was just mad.

You look back at it now and I understand more of the story,

if there was a story.

I didn't get a lot of the Thatcher jokes and the political jokes.

But it was a thing that you had to watch because if you went to

school the next day, me and my mates, we were all talking about it.

You'd have had to have... if you hadn't watched The Young Ones, then you're not part of our gang.

-Did you have a favourite character?

-Vyvyan all the time.

I told you that, Mike, you bloody cheat!

-Could you do a Neil?

-Oh, God! Erm...

AS NEIL: Oh, come on, Vyvyan!

-And Rick? Everyone done Rick.

-AS RICK: Neil! Neil!

Neil!

-BUZZER

-It was me... It was me!

-AUDIENCE BOOS

-Stop! Stop!

It was quite weird and surreal.

LAUGHTER

To get their money, it came through the light entertainment way.

-That's the reason the band would just appear at one point.

-OK, yeah, yeah.

You know, and they would have Madness or something in the lounge.

Yeah. No...it's a great show.

Again, one of the shows that probably made me think that

if these guys can do comedy, why can't I, you know?

I remember watching these shows going,

-how much fun they seem to be having.

-Yeah.

You think, this is fun. This is a great way to earn a living.

Those ever-so-charming boys went on to create more anarchic telly.

Rik Mayall, Ade Edmonson and Nigel Planer starred in slapstick

showbiz satire, Filthy Rich and Catflap,

about a desperate actor, his useless minder and his dodgy agent.

It was a warm-up for Rik and Ade's self-penned bonkers sitcom, Bottom,

which occasionally featured their old Young Ones chum,

Christopher Ryan.

So did you have any other comedy heroes at the time?

The one for me, this is a weird one in a way,

because I was quite young again watching him,

but I think Dave Allen, for me, was just a true genius.

And the biggest memory for me is watching Dave Allen with my dad.

And watching this guy who is incredibly cool, you know,

he looked cool, always wore this perfectly tailored three-piece suit.

You know, sitting there, with his whisky, having a cigarette.

Telling jokes and stories.

He was a guy from a Catholic background,

Irish background, that wasn't afraid to tackle, you know,

comedy within that Catholic faith or within his culture.

But did it with tremendous warmth and heart.

That lovely thing he would say at the end of every episode, you know,

"May your God go with you."

After all of that, after he's done... he's ridiculed Catholicism.

But at the end he'd go, "You know what, that was just comedy.

"May your God go with you." And that's just beautiful.

I want to talk now about the next generation of viewers

-that you have helped shape.

-Oh! Really?

-We've got a clip now from Desi DNA.

-OK, yeah.

The first thing that strikes me about this place

is the enormity of it, it is absolutely huge.

Adil's first big TV break arrived in 2003

when he presented the Asian arts and entertainment show, Desi DNA.

The series explored the changing face of Asian culture, both here and abroad.

..is that back in the UK, we're so used to going to the end of the street

and praying in that converted terraced house.

There was a group of presenters

and I was the longest running presenter over five series.

And it was great. It was a BBC Two thing, fantastic.

This mosque says as much about Pakistan's history as it does

is religion. Right in the middle of the courtyard, there is

this beautiful pavilion built by the ruler of Punjab, Ranjit Singh.

You know, Desi DNA, it was such a great series.

Desi means, it's a Punjabi word which means "authentic, real".

You know to be real and authentic.

And, you know, for people like us to be able to shout about

Asian culture, Asian art, you know,

architecture, to a mainstream BBC Two audience, was just fantastic.

-This was your first big break, really?

-It was really. Yeah.

It really was. I was working on the radio here and I sort of...

used to harass the people in the TV departments, saying, "I want to do something."

And eventually they gave me a chance here working on this and I did a few short pieces in series one,

but then ended up being the main presenter when it came back in series five.

You know, it was a real, real honour to do it, actually.

It felt... It didn't feel like work, but it felt quite important.

No, it felt very important. We touched on your radio show.

You used to have your own radio show.

I played a lot of music to begin with, but it was quite strange.

In that time I'd played music and then ended up doing a...

from there to a news journalism show.

I moved into a journalist kind of show.

But in all the shows, I was always doing a bit of comedy.

I would try and find some time in the format to do a sketch or do

a parody or something.

My first major break was with Paul Whitehouse

and Charlie Higson on a TV show called Bellamy's People.

That's where I got my first break for playing Mr Khan.

Look at that. That's my MC Raa character. Yeah.

A sort of a confused... confused British Asian.

-Why was he confused?

-Well, you know, he was very confused.

-Could you give me a bit of...?

-He was confused about his identity.

You know, someone would ask him, Gary Bellamy, who was

the sort of documentary maker going round interviewing all these

characters and he'd say to me, "What you think of Britain?"

And this guy would be like, "Well, you know, so what about Britain, yeah?

"We don't even want to be here. So what if you get free NHS?

"So what if you get like free homes? So what if you can get a Nintendo? So what if I can drive a BMW?

"So what if I can go to hospital for free?

"So what if I can get dental appointment free? I don't even want to be here."

And Gary Bellamy'd be like, "OK, so where do you want to be?"

He's like, "Er, Pakistan, innit?" "Well, why?"

"Because it's hotter!"

THEY LAUGH You know!

But it was a satirical sort of comment

of these guys who have sort of got this confusion about their identity, want to be angry about something

but aren't quite sure what they're angry about.

But the thing is what I learnt a lot from working with Paul and Charlie as well.

I'd like to think all the characters I have tried so far, and there's not many of them, they've all got

-a bit of a vulnerability and a bit of a heart to them.

-They are real.

-They're real.

-They are people you know and I think that is what Paul Whitehouse does.

-Exactly.

-Your characters. They are definitely people you know.

And quite often the people that... we think they are sort of saying

the most ridiculous things, we know that comes from somewhere.

They're human beings, really. And that's what really attracts me

about doing these sort of characters, really.

How is it for you that no-one knows you are...

..Citizen Khan?

-Even when you look at the photos, you don't...

-I know.

-It's amazing, the transformation.

-Yeah, I quite like that, actually.

Have you had people comment on it and not know that it's actually you?

Yeah, I've been in a restaurant in Birmingham,

out with a friend.

Literally a table next to us,

we've heard them talking about Citizen Khan.

And they've not realised that it's me.

Luckily for me they like the show, because had they criticised it,

I tell you what, that suit was going to go somewhere.

But no, that was quite sweet. And there's a great story about my aunt, series one.

Because for my family, they just couldn't believe that I was on TV.

"What, you're doing a sitcom? This doesn't make sense."

Let's not underestimate you, you wrote the sitcom.

Yeah, co-wrote the sitcom with Anil Gupta and Richard Pinto.

So my aunt came round once the show had been on and,

she came round for dinner and I said, "Did you like this show?"

She said, "Yeah, it was OK." I was like, "Oh."

So I said, "Auntie, what is it about the show?"

"Well, I really enjoyed the show, I loved it, it's really funny.

"Well, what's your problem?" She goes, "But you're not in it?" You know?

Bless her. She'd watched like three or four episodes and hadn't realised that I was Mr Khan.

So it is quite nice in that way, really.

So we had to sit down and put the DVD on

and get her to compare my nose... "Look, nose, same, same nose."

-Shall we have a little look at the first Asian sitcom on British television?

-Why not. Well done you.

Testing, testing, one, two.

This is President Khan speaking.

-That is you, that is great!

-That is me!

My fellow business leaders.

Ask not what your association can do for you.

But what have you done for me, lately?

-I am a big fan of this. I think it's really great.

-Thanks.

-You know you can drop in any time and use the facilities here.

-Yes.

-This is the house of God open to everyone.

-Yes, that is very nice.

-Can I just ask one thing?

-Shoot.

-Who the hell are you?

The thing with everything that I've done, even when I was on the BBC Asian network.

I used to say to my production team at the time, let's not think...

Let's not make programmes for Asian people,

because I don't know what that means. We are making programmes.

We are making programmes for people.

You know, not all Asian people are the same. And the same rules apply.

And I've always done that - when I've done my work on BBC Two, on magazine shows, presenting,

always thought about the audience, the channel.

And that was the same with BBC One.

But often with my writers, Richard Pinto and Anil Gupta have got such pedigree,

they worked on Goodness Gracious Me, The Kumars at 42, and written

those great things for Sanjeev Bhaskar and Meera Syal.

So they'd had this sort of experience of how you take

Asian sort of material to a more mainstream audience.

And I'd sometimes sit with my writer Richard,

"I will tell you what my dad used to do."

Or "I'll tell you what Asians do."

And he'd go, "Well everyone does that. Everyone is a bit tight."

Everyone's got their stories of how they'd add water

to the ketchup bottle or something like that.

And so it made me realise that actually, that the things happening in my house

are just like everyone else's house. But that is what we want to see in comedy, I think.

I think what we sometimes laugh at is familiarity.

You know, it's not just necessarily something that's very funny.

You laugh at, "That's just like me." You love that.

It's that warm feeling you get from sitcom, and British sitcom is really good at that.

-A nod, a recognition, that is what it is.

-Yeah, exactly.

-And you are?

-Mr Khan. Community leader.

-Mr Qureshi must have mentioned me?

-Oh, yes! You're Mr Khan.

That's me! Now, I need to talk about booking the mosque for my daughter's wedding.

-Oh, your daughter's getting married, congratulations.

-Thank you.

-You must be very proud?

-Hmm...

How do you feel about watching yourself?

It feels like such a long time ago now doing this scene, but it reminds

me when we did it for the very first time, performing on stage.

I feel the nerves sometimes. You must get this.

-"He's going to get a line wrong in a minute."

-Yeah.

-It's that thing.

But, no, it's great. It's great. And having the chance

to work with someone like Kris Marshall is brilliant.

What is the biggest buzz you get from writing Citizen Khan?

Is it writing, is it the performance, is it reaction?

I... I feel performance, obviously.

It is a great buzz with all the nerves that happen beforehand.

As soon as you're on stage, I am sure you have felt this, it is like, "Wow, this is great."

You feel like this is what I want to do. But in terms of the reaction, I've always said, you know,

writing this comedy, if it can go and television, go on to BBC One

and a white family are watching it

and the wife is sat next to the husband

and Mr Khan does something quite ridiculous,

and bear in mind this is a Pakistani Muslim guy with a beard that has

so many connotations and stereotypes that go with that image,

but suddenly you know the wife nudges the husband

while they're sat down having their fish and chips or their curry and goes,

"That Mr Khan, that's a bit of you, that is."

-Yeah.

-That... That gives me the greatest satisfaction.

That tells me that we are doing our job, we are

taking characters that have never been seen before on television

but people are relating to them and you have this sort

of universality that people go,

"Actually I connect so much with that."

Especially for young kids now, I kind of worried myself as a British Muslim

that the only time we see a Muslim guy with a beard on the telly is

when they've either been a terrorist or they are suspected

of being a terrorist, or they are on talking about terrorism.

And suddenly we have this bearded Muslim called Mr Khan who

is just a lovable guy, for young kids to go, "I like this guy.

"I think he is funny, I love him." You know, it's a great...

It's a great feeling, I have to say and it's credit to all the writers that I work with

and everyone on the show that makes that happen

-and I am glad it has all been embraced by our audience.

-And credit to you.

Now we always give our guests a chance to pick a theme tune

-to go out with.

-OK.

-What have you got in your head?

-Oh, God.

I think the ultimate for me,

and he's not with us any more, is John Sullivan, I think.

The fact that he wrote

and sang the theme tune to Only Fools And Horses, is just tremendous.

I don't think any sitcom has ever matched how big that theme

tune was and I don't think anyone ever will. It's just brilliant.

Just from the moment, the beginning of that drumroll, "du-du-du".

Oh, it's just fantastic!

And you have got to sing along to it.

-Just great, so Only Fools And Horses for me, I think.

-Thanks, Adil.

-Brian, thanks very much.

-God bless you.

-Thank you.

And thanks to you for watching The TV That Made Me. We will see you next time. Bye-bye.

# We've got some half price cracked ice

# And miles and miles of carpet tiles

# TVs, deep freeze and David Bowie LPs

# Ball games, gold chains, whatshisnames

# And Trevor Francis track suits from a mush in Shepherds Bush

# Bush, bush, bush, bush, bush, bush, bush...

# No income tax, no VAT

# No money back, no guarantee

# Black or white, rich or poor... #