Episode 4 ‹ Series 4 ‹ Total Wipeout

Line	From	To
Buenos Aires, home to Argentina's finest wines,	0:00:02	0:00:04
Argentina's finest steaks,	0:00:04	0:00:06
and, of course, Argentina's finest, and, er, only, Total Wipeout course!	0:00:06	0:00:10
20 of Britain finest and most upstandingest citizens,	0:00:10	0:00:14
including a cheerleader, a former wrestler and a microbiologist,	0:00:14	0:00:18
have journeyed from afar to take on the Total Wipeout course.	0:00:18	0:00:21
19 of them will crash and burn,	0:00:21	0:00:23
but one will emerge victorious like a phoenix from the flames...	0:00:23	0:00:27
well, a grilled chicken... to walk away with £10,000.	0:00:27	0:00:30
Let the games begin!	0:00:30	0:00:32
Welcome once again to Total Wipeout.	0:00:35	0:00:38
And there's a very special atmosphere in here because... drum roll, please!	0:00:38	0:00:42
-DRUM ROLL -..this is no ordinary edition!	0:00:42	0:00:46
What? This is an ordinary edition?	0:00:46	0:00:49
Oh, I must have misread that e-mail.	0:00:49	0:00:51
Ooh...	0:00:52	0:00:53
Atmosphere's kind of turned in here.	0:00:53	0:00:56
Never mind, I'll crack on! What's in store today?	0:00:56	0:00:58
The Qualifier sorts the wheat from the chaff!	0:00:59	0:01:02
Crash Mountain sorts the chaff from the other chaff.	0:01:02	0:01:06
Dizzy Dummies spins the chaff around and makes the chaff sick.	0:01:06	0:01:09
And finally the Wipeout Zone... Chaffin' heck, it's scary!	0:01:09	0:01:13
So the course is ready, the contestants are ready, Amanda Byram's ready,	0:01:15	0:01:19
my dinner's ready...	0:01:19	0:01:20
I'm not eating that broccoli!	0:01:20	0:01:22
Right, it's over to the course where Amanda is waiting with the first contestant.	0:01:22	0:01:25
This is 18-year-old man mountain Syed from Bangladesh...	0:01:31	0:01:36
via Birmingham.	0:01:36	0:01:37
-You're not exactly the biggest chap we've ever had on the Qualifier, Syed! -Maybe not,	0:01:37	0:01:43
but I don't think size matters. I've got speed. I've got speed. Speed's everything.	0:01:43	0:01:46
I'm Syed and I'm going to show you how it's done!	0:01:46	0:01:49
Yeah, OK, go on then! How's it done?	0:01:49	0:01:52
Yes... Oh?	0:01:52	0:01:54
That's how it's done? Got you!	0:01:54	0:01:56
Well, he's down the slide.	0:01:56	0:01:58
Syed's out of the water nice and quickly,	0:01:58	0:02:00
and now flying across the pontoons,	0:02:00	0:02:02
heading straight for the first obstacle.	0:02:02	0:02:04
It's the Crazy Keys,	0:02:04	0:02:06
and like everything on the Total Wipeout course	0:02:06	0:02:08
it's all about getting from the start to the end,	0:02:08	0:02:12
avoiding the water below and these planks	0:02:12	0:02:14
that can smash into your face like this.	0:02:14	0:02:16
But, surely, he's so light, he'll barely tickle those ivories?	0:02:16	0:02:20
Oh, no, no!	0:02:20	0:02:22
Still, doesn't matter, up you get.	0:02:24	0:02:26
Maybe he'll have more luck on the second set.	0:02:26	0:02:28
Come on, Syed!	0:02:28	0:02:30
Oh, nearly! Yes...	0:02:30	0:02:32
Yes, he makes it across the second set of Crazy Keys!	0:02:36	0:02:40
Well done, Syed!	0:02:40	0:02:41
Next, he faces the Sucker Punch,	0:02:41	0:02:43
a wall of relentless mechanical boxing gloves!	0:02:43	0:02:46
Is he man enough to defeat them?	0:02:46	0:02:48
-Well, apparently not, no! -The Sucker Punch	0:02:50	0:02:53
has just punched one of his brain cells out.	0:02:53	0:02:56
Looks like he's got two for the price of one there.	0:02:56	0:02:59
No extra charge!	0:02:59	0:03:01
Next up for our man mountain,	0:03:02	0:03:04
it's a modern-day version of David versus Goliath...	0:03:04	0:03:07
it's little Syed versus the Big Red Balls!	0:03:07	0:03:11
Some try to go over them,	0:03:11	0:03:13
some try to go under them,	0:03:13	0:03:15
and some ever try to go through them...the fools!	0:03:15	0:03:19
Just look at the aggression on his little face now! He really means business!	0:03:19	0:03:23
Can he do the double and make it across the Big Red Balls too?	0:03:23	0:03:26
Come on, Syed!	0:03:26	0:03:27
Ow! No...!	0:03:29	0:03:30
I thought it was too much to ask!	0:03:30	0:03:32
Man-mountain Syed only succeeds in launching himself into the water.	0:03:32	0:03:37
Climbing up on the molecules now on to the ladder,	0:03:37	0:03:40
Syed has flown round the Qualifier so far,	0:03:40	0:03:42
but now faces a new addition to the Total Wipeout course.	0:03:42	0:03:46
Nobody quite knows what they are...	0:03:47	0:03:49
Some think they might be an ancient astrological chart,	0:03:49	0:03:52
while others suspect they may form part of a medieval calendar...	0:03:52	0:03:56
To me, they look like a load of tyres wrapped in a bunch of colourful plastic...	0:03:56	0:04:00
so what are we calling this? It's the...what? The Ring-A-Dings?	0:04:00	0:04:03
Honestly, I've seen pre-school toys with scarier names than that!	0:04:03	0:04:08
Introducing the Ring-A-Dings!	0:04:08	0:04:10
Just 11 colourful hoops to go now for Syed...	0:04:11	0:04:15
Correction! Just a swim and some stairs to go now for Syed!	0:04:15	0:04:18
Man-mountain Syed gets round the course	0:04:18	0:04:21
as fast as his little legs will carry him!	0:04:21	0:04:23
In 2 minutes and 59 seconds.	0:04:23	0:04:25
Bangladesh!	0:04:25	0:04:27
Bangladesh to you too, Syed!	0:04:27	0:04:28
Next to go and no doubt inspired by Syed's exploits	0:04:29	0:04:32
is 35-year-old childminder Rachel from Derbyshire who is ever-so slightly excited	0:04:32	0:04:37
about taking on the Qualifier!	0:04:37	0:04:39
-Oh, I'm so excited! -Never?	0:04:39	0:04:42
# I'm so excited	0:04:42	0:04:43
# And I just can't hide it... #	0:04:43	0:04:46
You're going down, baby!	0:04:47	0:04:49
OK. Rachel launches herself...	0:04:50	0:04:52
gradually...and then a little bit quicker...that's gravity for you!	0:04:52	0:04:55
Helpful!	0:04:55	0:04:56
Not so excited now, I'll warrant!	0:04:56	0:04:59
OK, climbing out of the water with all the grace of a... graceless thing...	0:05:00	0:05:04
Strange, all of a sudden, excitable Rachel isn't as excited as she used to be!	0:05:04	0:05:10
How many Crazy Keys will Rachel get across?	0:05:10	0:05:13
One. One...	0:05:13	0:05:15
She crossed one key.	0:05:15	0:05:16
Talking of one key, I bet she's feeling a little bit "wonky" now!	0:05:16	0:05:21
I promise, no more like that, I'll stop.	0:05:21	0:05:23
Excitable Rachel on the Big Red Balls!	0:05:23	0:05:26
Quick, the Motivator's in motion!	0:05:26	0:05:28
To be fair, the click of the Motivator being released	0:05:30	0:05:33
is enough to scare anyone into a futile and ill-judged jump...	0:05:33	0:05:37
which that was.	0:05:37	0:05:38
# You wash your face in my sink You wash your face in my sink... #	0:05:41	0:05:44
It seems to me like Rachel's having a leisurely fun day out.	0:05:44	0:05:47
-Rachel's developed her own Ring-A-Ding technique, eh? -Does she know that it's against the clock?	0:05:47	0:05:52
I don't know. There isn't a clock fitted.	0:05:52	0:05:55
Rachel really needs to get a move on,	0:05:55	0:05:56
as, remember, only the fastest 12 contestants round the Qualifier	0:05:56	0:05:59
progress to the next round of the show. That isn't helping.	0:05:59	0:06:03
That means you've to get across the rings, Rachel!	0:06:03	0:06:05
# Like a puppet on a...	0:06:07	0:06:08
# String! #	0:06:11	0:06:12
Finally Rachel completes the Qualifier	0:06:12	0:06:14
in a not-so-exciting 7 minutes and 15 seconds.	0:06:14	0:06:16
Whoo!	0:06:16	0:06:17
I love you!	0:06:19	0:06:21
Yeah, and I love you too, Rachel!	0:06:21	0:06:23
And now a very proud moment for me.	0:06:23	0:06:25
After years of pestering the Total Wipeout big cheeses, they've done it.	0:06:25	0:06:29
They've finally got Royalty on the show.	0:06:29	0:06:32
Yep, the next competitor is a real bone fide African prince!	0:06:32	0:06:36
Because his uncle is king of his village.	0:06:36	0:06:38
Hang on! Why am I not king of my village? In fact, who is king of my village?	0:06:38	0:06:43
Oh, yeah...	0:06:43	0:06:44
Roger.	0:06:44	0:06:46
Anyway, back to it! All hail Prince Ndubisi...	0:06:46	0:06:49
..from Shepherds Bush!	0:06:50	0:06:52
-So how are Charles and Camilla doing? -Well, I'm not that kind of prince. I'm a prince from Nigeria.	0:06:54	0:06:59
-So I'm assuming you've got, like, butlers and stuff? -Well, I've got butlers, I've got drivers,	0:06:59	0:07:03
I've got cooks, I've got the whole works.	0:07:03	0:07:06
I'm going to be your Total Wipeout prince!	0:07:06	0:07:08
Yeah!	0:07:08	0:07:10
HOOTER	0:07:10	0:07:11
Ndubisi's off!	0:07:11	0:07:12
That's ridiculous! That's clearly not going to work, is it?	0:07:12	0:07:15
Nobody to lift him out the water. He did that himself.	0:07:17	0:07:20
On to the Crazy Keys!	0:07:20	0:07:21
Oh!	0:07:21	0:07:22
Those foaming keys really should show him some more respect.	0:07:22	0:07:25
He is royalty after all, don't you know?	0:07:25	0:07:26
If you've got a butler, why would you do this?	0:07:26	0:07:30
His Highness!	0:07:30	0:07:32
I know what's coming!	0:07:34	0:07:36
His Lowness!	0:07:36	0:07:37
Yeah, I knew she was going to say that.	0:07:37	0:07:39
If this happened to Ndubisi in his own kingdom,	0:07:40	0:07:42
I'm sure one of his courtiers would help him down.	0:07:42	0:07:45
Sadly, they're nowhere in sight. Must be back in Shepherds Bush!	0:07:45	0:07:48
Up next, it's 29-year-old Charlie from Croydon.	0:07:51	0:07:54
And there's something not quite right about him.	0:07:54	0:07:56
-Charlie, what is it you do? -I'm a microbiologist, Amanda.	0:07:56	0:08:00
So I work with bacteria every day.	0:08:00	0:08:01
-I have a dark secret. -Really?	0:08:01	0:08:04
Aaargh!	0:08:06	0:08:07
That's what's not quite right about him!	0:08:07	0:08:09
-Sorry about that. You need a little lie-down now after that? -I might just do.	0:08:09	0:08:13
-I'm going to lie down. You go conquer that! -Come on, I'm ready! Let's do it!	0:08:13	0:08:17
I'm putting this course to the test in the name of science	0:08:18	0:08:21
for all the hairy men out there...	0:08:21	0:08:23
-and women! -Don't mention Amanda's armpits!	0:08:23	0:08:26
Right, Charlie's off!	0:08:26	0:08:28
Oh, that chest hair must be waterlogged by now!	0:08:28	0:08:30
Maybe it helps! I don't know, he'll be warm...like a seal.	0:08:30	0:08:33
Charlie gets to his feet and charges towards the Crazy Keys.	0:08:33	0:08:36
As a scientist, Charlie knows of course, that what isn't held up	0:08:36	0:08:39
must come down!	0:08:39	0:08:41
That was Newton, wasn't it? Did he say that?	0:08:41	0:08:43
I'm no boffin, but even I know that head plus plastic-covered plank...	0:08:43	0:08:46
equals ouch!	0:08:46	0:08:48
On the plus side, I imagine, the water contains a lot of microbiology for Charlie to examine.	0:08:48	0:08:53
Oh, no!	0:08:55	0:08:56
Trying to hang on and failing!	0:08:56	0:08:58
He'll have a lot of microbiology in his trainers by now!	0:08:58	0:09:01
And Charlie faces the obstacle	0:09:01	0:09:03
that strikes fear into the hearts of hairy-chested scientists	0:09:03	0:09:06
the world over! Which strategy will he go for?	0:09:06	0:09:08
Will he be "hair" today, gone tomorrow?	0:09:08	0:09:11
Oh, no!	0:09:13	0:09:15
He's adopted the tripping and plummeting approach! That should put hairs on his chest!	0:09:15	0:09:18
Not that there's room, really!	0:09:18	0:09:20
Imagine how long it takes him to dry off afterwards! Does he use a dryer? A towel? I don't know!	0:09:22	0:09:27
Jet engine?	0:09:27	0:09:28
Finally it's the Ring-A-Dings!	0:09:28	0:09:30
Charlie should feel right at home here	0:09:30	0:09:32
like he's swinging from vine to vine, you see?	0:09:32	0:09:35
He's off!	0:09:35	0:09:36
Oh-oh, he's back again!	0:09:36	0:09:38
And he's off again!	0:09:38	0:09:39
And he's back again.	0:09:39	0:09:41
There we go!	0:09:41	0:09:43
Oh!	0:09:43	0:09:45
He must weight like a ton now, all waterlogged !	0:09:46	0:09:48
But Charlie and his chest hair complete the course	0:09:48	0:09:51
in a respectable 3 minutes 32 seconds.	0:09:51	0:09:52
# I wanna walk like you... #	0:09:52	0:09:54
SQUEALING: It's not easy!	0:09:54	0:09:55
Like a man voiced by a lady!	0:09:55	0:09:57
Tell me about your chest hair. Did it weigh you down at all?	0:09:57	0:09:59
Yeah, I did feel a bit of drag, actually!	0:09:59	0:10:02
That's enough from you, monkey boy!	0:10:02	0:10:04
Meanwhile, it's all been a bit too much for Ndubisi,	0:10:04	0:10:07
who appears to be having a royal sleep.	0:10:07	0:10:09
Wake up!	0:10:09	0:10:11
Oh, the great man stirs...	0:10:12	0:10:13
..and falls! Now I feel bad, like I actually did that!	0:10:14	0:10:18
Those Ring-A-Dings really are proving difficult...	0:10:18	0:10:21
silly, but difficult.	0:10:21	0:10:23
A true royal variety performance there from Ndubisi	0:10:23	0:10:25
who finishes with the princely time of 6 minutes 10 seconds.	0:10:25	0:10:29
Does that get the royal seal of approval?	0:10:29	0:10:31
Yes, yes, yes. Now, where are those fish?	0:10:31	0:10:35
Give me strength! To think I turned down Panorama for this!	0:10:35	0:10:39
Now, this is 24-year-old Cherry, a modern languages teacher from Belfast.	0:10:39	0:10:43
I'm going to be like Speedy Gonzales!	0:10:43	0:10:45
Arriba, arriba! Andale, andale! HOOTER	0:10:45	0:10:48
Is that a modern language?	0:10:48	0:10:50
Right, Speedy Gon-Cherry sped into her face there...	0:10:50	0:10:53
on the pontoons.	0:10:53	0:10:55
She's off, nothing can stop her...	0:10:55	0:10:57
apart from that. That did stop her.	0:10:57	0:10:59
# Speedy Gonzales... #	0:10:59	0:11:01
Yeah, her face is taking some punishment already!	0:11:01	0:11:04
Right, after a slow start she needs to be quick, she needs to be fast...	0:11:06	0:11:09
And now she needs to get out of that mud.	0:11:10	0:11:12
The mud really causing Cherry problems here.	0:11:14	0:11:16
She's trying to, what? Drink it all? Or...?	0:11:18	0:11:22
Can anyone help her? Anyone?	0:11:22	0:11:24
Anyone?	0:11:24	0:11:26
Anyone?	0:11:28	0:11:29
-TRUMPET BLAST -Ooh, that sounds promising!	0:11:29	0:11:31
My name's Ollie and I'm no wally!	0:11:32	0:11:34
CREAKING	0:11:34	0:11:36
-What are you going to be out there today? -I'm going to be a cross between Alfie Moon,	0:11:36	0:11:39
a ninja and just someone who's really good at doing Total Wipeout!	0:11:39	0:11:43
Well, good. Don't worry, Cherry, no-wally Ollie is on his way!	0:11:43	0:11:47
Some ninja-like jumping there!	0:11:47	0:11:49
And now some Alfie moon-like running!	0:11:49	0:11:52
On to the keys!	0:11:52	0:11:53
Quickstepping technique proves...	0:11:53	0:11:56
ineffective!	0:11:56	0:11:57
For one moment, I thought it would work.	0:11:57	0:12:00
He flew like Superman, then fell like a normal bloke!	0:12:00	0:12:03
Oh! Oh, I'm so wet!	0:12:04	0:12:07
Not the most heroic of squeaking noises. I hope Cherry didn't hear it.	0:12:07	0:12:10
No...	0:12:10	0:12:11
Too much mud in her ears. Still waiting for rescue!	0:12:11	0:12:14
Ollie the non-wally tries the Big Balls!	0:12:14	0:12:17
Honest, he did look like a bit of a wally there!	0:12:18	0:12:20
Even heroes need to go forwards on the Big Red Balls,	0:12:21	0:12:24
not just upwards, sideways and downwards and splash!	0:12:24	0:12:27
Right, this looks promising!	0:12:27	0:12:29
A confident ninja-like jump on to the red Ring-A-Ding.	0:12:29	0:12:33
Could he be the first person...?	0:12:33	0:12:34
No...disappointing.	0:12:35	0:12:37
# And they say that a hero can save us... #	0:12:37	0:12:40
21-year-old student no-wally Ollie finishes the course	0:12:40	0:12:43
in 3 minutes and 3 seconds! Quite impressive,	0:12:43	0:12:46
And even more impressive is he managed to save Cherry...	0:12:46	0:12:49
No, wait a minute! He forgot to save Cherry!	0:12:49	0:12:51
What a wally!	0:12:51	0:12:53
Cherry, bad news, I'm afraid.	0:12:53	0:12:54
No-wally Ollie has forgotten about you and this is, well, awkward!	0:12:54	0:12:58
But, fear not, Speedy Gon-Cherry can rely on her cat-like agility	0:12:58	0:13:02
to get over the Big Red...	0:13:02	0:13:04
Oh!	0:13:04	0:13:05
Oh, well!	0:13:05	0:13:06
But Cherry does utilise her incredible muscular flexibility!	0:13:08	0:13:11
Look, her feet there, kicking the back of her own head!	0:13:11	0:13:14
That's difficult!	0:13:14	0:13:16
Speedy Gon-Cherry finally completes the course in 6 minutes 16 seconds.	0:13:16	0:13:20
A real, live Mexican mouse would have been quicker than that!	0:13:20	0:13:25
But there are still 14 contestants to run, so it's time to crack on!	0:13:41	0:13:46
So far today it's Qualifier 8, contestants 0.	0:13:46	0:13:50
What we need is someone to teach that course a jolly good lesson,	0:13:50	0:13:53
and who better than today's next contender, 25-year-old Shaun from Manchester	0:13:53	0:13:58
who's a maths teacher?	0:13:58	0:14:00
Me plus Wipeout equals...winner!	0:14:00	0:14:04
Yeah, we'll be the judge of that, Shaun, if you don't mind!	0:14:04	0:14:06
Shaun plus slippery slope	0:14:06	0:14:08
equals a big splash! There you go!	0:14:08	0:14:10
Shaun now needs to formulate the ultimate solution	0:14:14	0:14:16
to beat the Crazy Keys. Has he got his calculations right?	0:14:16	0:14:18
Ooh, so far so good! Lucky escape for Shaun, but he's still on!	0:14:18	0:14:22
Looks like he's done his homework here!	0:14:22	0:14:24
Ho-ho! Maybe not!	0:14:24	0:14:26
Let's see that one again!	0:14:26	0:14:28
Yeah, got his working wrong there!	0:14:28	0:14:30
Getting an F-minus for that!	0:14:30	0:14:31
Shaun plus Crazy Keys equals	0:14:31	0:14:34
pain for Shaun!	0:14:34	0:14:36
His school report so far reads "must try harder"!	0:14:36	0:14:39
Shaun on the Big Red Balls!	0:14:39	0:14:41
He jumps he bounces...he splashes.	0:14:41	0:14:43
He taught those Big Red Balls a lesson!	0:14:43	0:14:46
So can Shaun be the first to traverse the Ring-A-Dings?	0:14:47	0:14:50
11 colourful hoops plus a 15-foot drop!	0:14:50	0:14:52
You do the maths... or math, as the Americans say.	0:14:52	0:14:56
Why do they say that?	0:14:56	0:14:57
It's maths. Not doing too well by the looks of things.	0:14:57	0:15:00
No...	0:15:00	0:15:01
No.	0:15:01	0:15:03
So maths teacher Shaun finished in 4 minutes 7 seconds,	0:15:03	0:15:07
minus his dignity!	0:15:07	0:15:09
So, Shaun...	0:15:09	0:15:11
plus the Qualifier now equals...	0:15:11	0:15:15
Knackered!	0:15:15	0:15:16
Shaun isn't the only teacher who's found the time to come to Argentina today.	0:15:18	0:15:21
Must be the school holidays.	0:15:21	0:15:23
Let's meet his rivals for title of teacher's pet.	0:15:23	0:15:26
PE teacher Emily from London.	0:15:26	0:15:28
Kids, do as I say not as I do!	0:15:28	0:15:30
And all stand, please, class, it's head teacher, Jeremy from Norfolk.	0:15:30	0:15:35
If I don't get round the course, I'm going to put myself in detention!	0:15:35	0:15:37
All of these teachers are going to regret this, but who will be getting the gold star,	0:15:37	0:15:41
and who will be wearing the dunce's hat?	0:15:41	0:15:43
Who will have a scrap of dignity left when they're back at school?	0:15:43	0:15:46
None of them!	0:15:46	0:15:47
Jeremy leads by example and goes head first into the water.	0:15:47	0:15:50
At the Crazy Keys, Emily fares no better.	0:15:51	0:15:54
Emily's given a physical education. She'll be off games for a couple of weeks!	0:15:54	0:15:58
# I got to go back to school... #	0:15:58	0:16:02
Jeremy. Big Balls. Sorry, sir. That sounded wrong when I said that.	0:16:02	0:16:06
Jeremy trying to get down with the kids there,	0:16:07	0:16:09
bit of crazy-legs break-dancing	0:16:09	0:16:11
and ends up face down in the water.	0:16:11	0:16:13
Emily's turn and she...	0:16:15	0:16:18
teaches us a new kneeling skid technique.	0:16:18	0:16:20
The kids will have seen all of this.	0:16:20	0:16:23
Can either of them do the impossible and complete the rings?	0:16:23	0:16:25
Jeremy hits the deck first, closely followed by Emily. Surely these rings are too hard?	0:16:26	0:16:31
Jeremy clocks in with a time of 4 minutes and 20 seconds,	0:16:31	0:16:34
just behind Emily who completes the course in 3 minutes and 49 seconds,	0:16:34	0:16:38
making her the teacher's pet and Jeremy the class clown!	0:16:38	0:16:42
The teachers have had their turn.	0:16:44	0:16:46
So now it's time for a student, 20-year-old Adrian from London.	0:16:46	0:16:50
Does he have the confidence to defeat the Qualifier?	0:16:50	0:16:53
I'm the jack of all trades, so watch this space!	0:16:53	0:16:55
Shout to everyone in my phone, shout to everyone who wants to be in my phone.	0:16:55	0:16:59
Mmm, that'll be a yes, then!	0:16:59	0:17:00
Is there anybody you know out straight you're going to beat easy?	0:17:00	0:17:04
Well, the girls can just move aside.	0:17:04	0:17:07
They might get far-ish. Well done for the girls, but there's no girls winning!	0:17:07	0:17:11
-That's not very nice. What does your girlfriend think of that? -Oh, no, I'm single!	0:17:11	0:17:16
Funny, that, Adrian!	0:17:16	0:17:17
I'm not Usain Bolt, I'm not Michael Phelps, but I'm close enough! Come on!	0:17:18	0:17:22
Well, I'm neither of them either!	0:17:22	0:17:24
OK, expect Olympic level sprinting and swimming...	0:17:24	0:17:27
That actually was part-Bolt part-Phelps when he started.	0:17:27	0:17:30
I'm sure all you ladies out there are rooting for Adrian	0:17:30	0:17:33
after his outburst earlier, including my daughters. He's...	0:17:33	0:17:36
Hang on, he's hanging on!	0:17:36	0:17:37
He's hanging on, he's determined.	0:17:37	0:17:39
Mmm...bit of justice maybe for the ladies there.	0:17:39	0:17:42
Looks like that hasn't slowed him down though	0:17:42	0:17:44
as he powers through the water.	0:17:44	0:17:45
Single Adrian looks determined at the Sucker Punch...	0:17:45	0:17:49
Oh!	0:17:49	0:17:51
I should have said,	0:17:51	0:17:52
Mrs Eduardo is operating the bonus punch there today.	0:17:52	0:17:54
She didn't like what he said!	0:17:54	0:17:56
Single Adrian up and out the mud	0:17:58	0:17:59
on to the Big Balls!	0:17:59	0:18:01
Here we go!	0:18:01	0:18:03
Oh!	0:18:03	0:18:05
On the rebound?	0:18:05	0:18:07
Well, that relationship didn't last very long and now he really is on the rebound.	0:18:07	0:18:11
That would make a great singles ad.	0:18:12	0:18:14
Adrian, falls off a lot of things, but has a great sense of humour!	0:18:14	0:18:18
He'll need that good sense of humour right now, because it's Ring-A-Dings time!	0:18:20	0:18:25
But maybe single Adrian has figured out	0:18:25	0:18:27
there's a way to defeat these things.	0:18:27	0:18:29
No, he hasn't, has he?	0:18:29	0:18:31
On the plus side, Adrian hauls himself on to the podium	0:18:31	0:18:35
in the fastest time of the day so far, 2 minutes 49.	0:18:35	0:18:38
On the minus side, he is still single.	0:18:38	0:18:41
Those Ring-A-Dings really are proving extremely difficult.	0:18:41	0:18:45
Usually when Eduardo finds old tyres lying around,	0:18:45	0:18:48
he just tosses them on to his giant family barbecue.	0:18:48	0:18:51
But not this time.	0:18:51	0:18:53
His kids might be missing the distinctive taste of rubber-smoked beefburgers,	0:18:53	0:18:57
but that's our game, because instead we've got the Ring-A-Dings!	0:18:57	0:19:01
# Monkey, monkey, monkey	0:19:01	0:19:03
# Monkey, monkey, monkey, monkey, monkey	0:19:04	0:19:06
# Monkey, monkey, monkey... #	0:19:07	0:19:10
Every technique used so far today has failed.	0:19:10	0:19:13
So what approach will 23-year-old waitress Lisa use?	0:19:13	0:19:17
Are you in a bit of a pickle, Lisa?	0:19:17	0:19:19
Aaargh!	0:19:19	0:19:20
Nice, the upside-down approach!	0:19:20	0:19:22
Yeah, another method that just doesn't really work.	0:19:22	0:19:25
She didn't have to wait long before she hit the water!	0:19:25	0:19:28
If anyone can beat the Ring-A-Dings, sure it's Rambo?	0:19:28	0:19:32
Sorry, I mean 51-year-old Iain, a photographer from Devon.	0:19:32	0:19:35
I can run 100 miles!	0:19:35	0:19:37
I can usually beat the best!	0:19:37	0:19:39
I've been working on me guns so let's put them to the test!	0:19:39	0:19:44
And the Rings draw first blood from Rambo!	0:19:47	0:19:50
So how about 31-year-old cake designer Amy from Northumberland?	0:19:50	0:19:53
PHRRRT!	0:19:53	0:19:54
I'm going to run, run as fast as I can. You won't catch me, I'm like a gingerbread man!	0:19:54	0:19:59
Work those hips, Amy! Work those hips!	0:19:59	0:20:02
That's what I thought! Amy's used to dealing with a different kind of colourful sponge!	0:20:02	0:20:06
Is anyone ever going to get across these rings today?	0:20:06	0:20:10
# Everybody look, yeah, yeah. #	0:20:10	0:20:12
The next contestant hoping to ding-a-ling-ling those Ring-A-Dings	0:20:12	0:20:15
is 25-year-old cheerleader Ellie from Blackpool.	0:20:15	0:20:18
Total Wipeout, here I come,	0:20:18	0:20:20
watch out, guys, I'm number one!	0:20:20	0:20:22
She's at the Crazy Keys.	0:20:22	0:20:24
Oh, great recovery there from Ellie,	0:20:24	0:20:27
managing to keep her head above water...	0:20:27	0:20:28
but not for long!	0:20:28	0:20:29
I didn't help saying what I said.	0:20:29	0:20:31
No cheering necessary here! She's useless without her pompoms!	0:20:31	0:20:35
I think it's even given Ellie a little shock by the look on her face!	0:20:36	0:20:40
Now for the Big Red Balls.	0:20:42	0:20:43
She has composure, she has balance...	0:20:43	0:20:45
and now she has a face full of water!	0:20:45	0:20:47
Two, four, six, eight,	0:20:47	0:20:50
Big Balls she doesn't appre... I'm not a cheerleader! What can I do?	0:20:50	0:20:53
Which way?	0:20:57	0:20:59
This way!	0:20:59	0:21:00
The opposite way to the way you just came!	0:21:01	0:21:04
Despite her lack of pompoms and direction,	0:21:04	0:21:06
Ellie completes the Qualifier in a time of 3 minutes and 49 seconds.	0:21:06	0:21:10
What about your big, big pompoms over there, the Big Red Balls?	0:21:10	0:21:13
I fell off everything. I was rubbish!	0:21:13	0:21:17
With 14 runners having now tackled the Qualifier,	0:21:17	0:21:20
the leader board looks like this...	0:21:20	0:21:22
Next on the Qualifier is 41-year-old motorbike enthusiast Jane from Dorset...	0:21:40	0:21:45
whose trousers don't fit.	0:21:45	0:21:47
My name's Jane and I've got a motorbike,	0:21:48	0:21:51
so I'm going to pull my throttle and ride like the wind! Vroom!	0:21:51	0:21:55
I love motorbikes too and if I had my way I'd let everyone go round the course on two wheels!	0:21:55	0:22:00
It would make it better!	0:22:00	0:22:01
See? That's fantastic! My dream TV show! Junior Total Kick Start Wipeout!	0:22:01	0:22:07
Anyway, bikeless, off goes Jane.	0:22:08	0:22:10
Here she comes, little, bouncy Jane!	0:22:12	0:22:14
Let's hope the Crazy Keys don't stall her bid for glory.	0:22:14	0:22:18
Oh, yowza!	0:22:19	0:22:20
Straddling the Crazy Keys is not be recommended, kids!	0:22:20	0:22:23
Lucky she didn't have a motorbike. The engine would have flooded there.	0:22:23	0:22:27
Still, she's undeterred and attempts the second set	0:22:29	0:22:31
of Crazy Keys...which...	0:22:31	0:22:33
ends up with the same result.	0:22:33	0:22:36
I can't look!	0:22:36	0:22:37
Well, you must look! That's the whole point of this show!	0:22:37	0:22:40
Double header, front of head and back of head,	0:22:40	0:22:42
twice the pain, bang, bang!	0:22:42	0:22:44
This is where Jane can really kick-start her challenge	0:22:44	0:22:46
-on the Big Balls! -MUSIC: "Carmina Burana"	0:22:46	0:22:48
Here we go!	0:22:48	0:22:49
Oh! Oooh!	0:22:49	0:22:51
Oh, that looked painful!	0:22:51	0:22:53
Hang on a minute! Everything seems wonderful when the Junior Kick Start theme plays.	0:22:53	0:22:58
-MUSIC: "Junior Kick Start Theme" -See what I mean? Feels better! I am happy!	0:22:58	0:23:02
Kick-Start Jane motors round the course in 3 minutes and 56 seconds.	0:23:02	0:23:07
Will that be enough to see her through to Crash Mountain?	0:23:07	0:23:09
Seriously, on bikes, we could do it!	0:23:09	0:23:12
Can I come down?	0:23:13	0:23:14
When you were on your two feet, standing upright,	0:23:17	0:23:19
-in fairness, you were pretty speedy. -Oh, good...	0:23:19	0:23:22
That wasn't very often!	0:23:22	0:23:24
No!	0:23:24	0:23:26
The next two contestants are here to settle an argument as old as time itself.	0:23:27	0:23:32
Who would reign supreme round a course of foam plastic stupidity,	0:23:32	0:23:36
PC Plod or Fireman Sam?	0:23:36	0:23:39
Unfortunately, neither of them are real, so we'll never know,	0:23:39	0:23:42
but in their place are two of Cheltenham's finest!	0:23:42	0:23:44
For the Old Bill, it's 28-year-old Kim the copper.	0:23:46	0:23:48
Big Balls, Big Balls, what are you going to do, what are you going to do when I come for you?	0:23:48	0:23:53
And for the fire brigade, it's 44-year-old fire-fighter	0:23:53	0:23:56
and part-time window cleaner Smoking' Jo.	0:23:56	0:23:59
Fire, fire, I'll extinguish this course.	0:23:59	0:24:02
Shouting!	0:24:02	0:24:02
So Kim the copper begins the battle of the services...	0:24:02	0:24:05
That's a good start.	0:24:05	0:24:07
On to the podium.	0:24:07	0:24:10
Meanwhile Jo's on the Crazy Keys.	0:24:10	0:24:12
Oh! Her hopes just got extinguished.	0:24:12	0:24:14
Her long legs got her into a little bit of trouble there by the look of things.	0:24:14	0:24:18
I would say that hurt quite a lot.	0:24:18	0:24:20
Kim's go now.	0:24:20	0:24:22
Oh!	0:24:22	0:24:23
Thank goodness there isn't an actual emergency on the course.	0:24:23	0:24:26
Kim the copper just got assaulted by a Crazy Key!	0:24:26	0:24:28
Smokin' Jo looks ready for a fight. On to the Sucker Punch.	0:24:31	0:24:35
Oh, and she gets one,	0:24:35	0:24:37
taking it on the chin for her troubles!	0:24:37	0:24:39
I bet she'd rather be rescuing a cat from a tree right now!	0:24:39	0:24:42
Kim back on the case and taking on the Big Red Balls.	0:24:45	0:24:47
Here she goes!	0:24:47	0:24:49
Yes...	0:24:49	0:24:51
Oh, weird!	0:24:51	0:24:51
She aimed right between two of the balls! Did there used to be another one there?	0:24:51	0:24:55
Has it been stolen? Was it the one and a half is missing?	0:24:55	0:24:58
Jo's go now.	0:24:58	0:25:00
And forget the fire brigade. Call the lifeguards!	0:25:00	0:25:02
Fire-fighter and part-time window cleaner Jo must be used to ladders.	0:25:02	0:25:06
I mean, they are central to her work.	0:25:06	0:25:09
What happened there?	0:25:09	0:25:10
I'm not sure I'd trust her with my windows or rescuing my cat!	0:25:10	0:25:14
And so Smokin' Jo completes the course in 3 minutes and 23 seconds.	0:25:16	0:25:20
-Not that you've never fallen off a ladder before! -How embarrassing is that, eh?	0:25:21	0:25:25
Tell me what the boys at the station will think of that performance.	0:25:25	0:25:28
Er...I don't think I'll ever hear the end of it.	0:25:28	0:25:31
But Kim the copper emerges victorious with an impressive time	0:25:31	0:25:35
of 2 minutes 52 seconds. That's a win to the boys and girls in blue!	0:25:35	0:25:39
I'm here at the start of the Qualifier in the presence of holiness.	0:25:38	0:25:43
So, Jim from Perth, tell me what is that you do?	0:25:43	0:25:47
Amanda, I'm a Church of Scotland minister and I've been one for 14 years.	0:25:47	0:25:51
Yeah, the old "using the big chap upstairs to look after you" trick, eh? Let's see if it works, Jim!	0:25:52	0:25:57
And so Holy Jim begins his crusade.	0:25:57	0:26:00
What was that? No parting of the Wipeout sea for him!	0:26:00	0:26:03
Maybe a bit of faith will get Jim across the Crazy Keys.	0:26:03	0:26:07
It's working, it's working...	0:26:07	0:26:09
it's failing him.	0:26:09	0:26:10
Oh, holy moly!	0:26:10	0:26:12
It hurt, that's the main thing. You need to have 90% faith, 10% pure luck.	0:26:12	0:26:16
And an extra 100% of padding.	0:26:16	0:26:19
Holy Jim could do with a miraculous Ball crossing now...	0:26:19	0:26:23
Look at that! Holy Jim has left an ungodly mess to clean up on that Red Ball there!	0:26:24	0:26:29
Like a Turin Shroud, Jim getting his face on there!	0:26:29	0:26:32
Will the Ring-A-Dings administer some treatment of their own?	0:26:32	0:26:36
That was a pun, it was a pun!	0:26:36	0:26:38
Sorry.	0:26:38	0:26:39
Holy Jim completes the course in a time of 3 minutes and 21 seconds.	0:26:43	0:26:47
And his performance should stand him in good stead for the next life...	0:26:47	0:26:50
next round, I mean!	0:26:50	0:26:52
This is 31-year-old Barry from Leeds, and guess what his job is?	0:26:53	0:26:57
Yeah, he's a tennis umpire... obviously.	0:26:57	0:27:00
But he used to be a wrestler.	0:27:00	0:27:03
Yeah, that's enough, thank you. Stop it!	0:27:03	0:27:05
Can you give me a bit of a wrestling demonstration?	0:27:05	0:27:07
-Don't say that! -Aieeee! -Why would you ask for that?	0:27:07	0:27:10
Glad he put Amanda down before attempting the course.	0:27:10	0:27:13
He's surprisingly dainty, isn't he, delicate?	0:27:13	0:27:15
Oh!	0:27:16	0:27:17
Right in the face!	0:27:17	0:27:18
Oh, that's got to be nasty!	0:27:19	0:27:22
Wrestling V boxing now on the Sucker Punch.	0:27:22	0:27:24
They say wrestling's faked,	0:27:24	0:27:26
but you can't fake that, can you?	0:27:26	0:27:28
That's real, he actually did fall in the mud, bum first!	0:27:28	0:27:32
New-balls Barry challenges the Big Balls now...fearless...	0:27:32	0:27:35
and hopeless.	0:27:35	0:27:37
If Barry had landed on a wrestler instead of some water, that would have been a sweet move!	0:27:37	0:27:42
He's got his beard wet.	0:27:46	0:27:48
It'll take some ringing out, that!	0:27:48	0:27:50
New-balls Barry's final time is	0:27:50	0:27:52
3 minutes 41, and that should just about see him through to round 2.	0:27:52	0:27:56
Pretty surprised you're still in one piece after that!	0:27:56	0:27:59
Thank you... Your concern touches me.	0:27:59	0:28:02
Last to take on the Qualifier is Katie and it says here she's the daughter of A Lamb...	0:28:03	0:28:08
-BLEATING -What? Beg your pardon!	0:28:08	0:28:10
It says she is the daughter of Allan Lamb, the former England cricket captain.	0:28:10	0:28:14
I've made a big list of cricket puns and I'm ready to use them!	0:28:14	0:28:17
Prepare to be bowled over!	0:28:17	0:28:19
I'll have to cross that one off the list now. I was going to use it.	0:28:19	0:28:22
Now that's a pace attack!	0:28:24	0:28:26
100% commitment down the slide and she's rewarded with 100% whack in the face!	0:28:26	0:28:31
The Sucker Punch is less leg before wicket and leg over boxing glove...	0:28:31	0:28:35
Mr Lamb, she's doing very well.	0:28:36	0:28:38
Yes, Katie becomes the first maiden over the Sucker Punch today!	0:28:40	0:28:43
You see? That takes some working out.	0:28:43	0:28:46
I'm exhausted. Her dad was used to small red balls,	0:28:46	0:28:49
how will Katie deal with big bouncy ones?	0:28:49	0:28:51
Oh, she goes for a duck!	0:28:51	0:28:53
That bowling action is clearly hereditary!	0:28:53	0:28:55
And, look, some good spinning action at the end there too.	0:28:55	0:28:58
# Come fly with me Let's fly, let's fly away... #	0:28:58	0:29:03
And Katie lamby Lamb	0:29:04	0:29:06
completes her innings with a time of 3 minutes and 14.	0:29:06	0:29:09
All I can say is, "Bring it on, Dad!"	0:29:11	0:29:13
So all 20 contestants have now run the Qualifier.	0:29:13	0:29:17
So the Qualifier comes to an end,	0:29:33	0:29:35
and, with it, so do the hopes and dreams of eight contestants.	0:29:35	0:29:39
As is customary at this point, it's time for a moment of reflection	0:29:39	0:29:42
and some slow-motion replays of those fallen by the wayside,	0:29:42	0:29:45
accompanied by a soaring, emotional soundtrack.	0:29:45	0:29:48
The question is will that music be Westlife, Coldplay or Leona Lewis?	0:29:48	0:29:52
Bet you a fiver it's Leona!	0:29:52	0:29:54
MUSIC: "A Moment Like This" by Leona Lewis	0:29:54	0:29:57
Thank you very much!	0:30:26	0:30:28
Now, forget about what's just been lost, whether it's eight contestants or a five-pound note!	0:30:28	0:30:34
Because it's time to get on with the action. It is Crash Mountain!	0:30:35	0:30:38
The 12 remaining contestants now face Crash Mountain.	0:30:44	0:30:47
Which, not a lot of people know, also auditioned for a part on another BBC show...	0:30:47	0:30:51
Exterminate! Exterminate!	0:30:51	0:30:54
Having failed the audition, the Dalek reject was flown economy to Argentina	0:30:54	0:30:58
and given a new lease of life.	0:30:58	0:31:00
The contestants need to get across the large red walkway that goes one way,	0:31:02	0:31:06
whilst and even larger red-and-blue battering ram goes the other.	0:31:06	0:31:09
The first five to reach the middle of Crash Mountain will progress to Dizzy Dummies.	0:31:09	0:31:14
Here's a reminder of the 12 remaining contestants.	0:31:14	0:31:16
On podiums 1 and 2,	0:31:17	0:31:20
luscious-lips Lisa and man-mountain Syed.	0:31:20	0:31:22
-If I don't win, no-one is! -You tell them, big guy!	0:31:22	0:31:25
On 3 and 4, Kim the copper...	0:31:25	0:31:28
This cop isn't going to drop!	0:31:28	0:31:30
..And no-wally Ollie.	0:31:30	0:31:31
making up the first half dozen, it's Holy Jim and Smokin' Jo!	0:31:31	0:31:36
Adrian, your fire's going right out!	0:31:36	0:31:39
On podiums 7 and 8...pompom Ellie...	0:31:40	0:31:43
There may be six women and six men, but there's women going through today!	0:31:43	0:31:47
No!	0:31:47	0:31:49
And single Adrian.	0:31:50	0:31:51
I was the fastest on the Qualifier, so say no more!	0:31:51	0:31:55
Boo!	0:31:55	0:31:57
On 9 and 10, Katy the Lamb...	0:31:58	0:32:00
You might be able to walk on water, but I can run on air!	0:32:00	0:32:04
What does that actually mean? And PE Emily.	0:32:04	0:32:07
Making up the dirty dozen... new-balls Barry	0:32:07	0:32:10
and chest-hair Charlie.	0:32:10	0:32:11
I had a nightmare last night that the god of game shows	0:32:11	0:32:15
created the most devastating game known to mankind,	0:32:15	0:32:18
and when I woke up this morning, look what I found at the bottom of my bed! It's Crash Mountain!	0:32:18	0:32:23
Are you all ready?	0:32:23	0:32:25
Yeah!	0:32:25	0:32:27
In your dreams! Three, two, one!	0:32:27	0:32:30
HOOTER	0:32:30	0:32:33
The spinning begins which means that jumping, running and falling are now imminent.	0:32:33	0:32:38
Smokin' Jo gets her falling underway very quickly.	0:32:38	0:32:40
Now new-balls Barry gives it a go.	0:32:40	0:32:42
Maybe his arm tassels softened the fall for him.	0:32:42	0:32:44
What was he thinking?	0:32:44	0:32:46
Holy Jim tries the blind-faith approach.	0:32:46	0:32:48
Single Adrian also falls.	0:32:48	0:32:51
No-wally Ollie... looks like a bit of a wally there.	0:32:54	0:32:57
Pompom Ellie falls...	0:32:57	0:32:59
Katy the Lamb falls.	0:32:59	0:33:00
Chest-hair Charlie falls. Is there anyone left to fall?	0:33:00	0:33:04
This is Crash Mountain carnage!	0:33:04	0:33:07
PE Emily...	0:33:07	0:33:08
face full of plastic!	0:33:08	0:33:10
Luscious-lips Lisa tries...	0:33:10	0:33:12
and falls.	0:33:12	0:33:13
Single Adrian back for more...	0:33:17	0:33:20
swimming, that is!	0:33:20	0:33:21
-Give it another go! Get in there! -Holy Jim...	0:33:24	0:33:29
Holy moly!	0:33:29	0:33:30
Our Father, deliver him to the middle, please.	0:33:30	0:33:33
No-one's got even close yet. Could new-balls Barry change all that?	0:33:36	0:33:41
No.	0:33:41	0:33:42
And they all started off so gung-ho, but now they're looking much more anxious.	0:33:45	0:33:49
-My legs are shaking! -Come on, someone do it, for goodness' sake!	0:33:49	0:33:52
Single Adrian goes for it and he's there!	0:33:54	0:33:57
First one across and about time too!	0:33:57	0:34:00
Cometh the hour, cometh the ladies' man!	0:34:00	0:34:03
Is that a Buddhist mantra? Should be. It is now!	0:34:03	0:34:05
So who will join that lucky so-and-so in the middle?	0:34:05	0:34:09
How does he do it? The man never works out, always wins things!	0:34:09	0:34:14
Kim's fallen in. Now pompom Ellie is on the paddle.	0:34:15	0:34:19
Come on, Ellie!	0:34:19	0:34:20
She's up...	0:34:24	0:34:26
And now Ellie understands why the show's called Total Wipeout!	0:34:29	0:34:33
Cos she was totally!	0:34:33	0:34:35
Pretty good, Total Wipeout.	0:34:36	0:34:37
Syed and Lisa both jump... and both fall.	0:34:37	0:34:40
Two for the price of one!	0:34:40	0:34:42
Emily gets safely on to the paddle.	0:34:45	0:34:48
Come on!	0:34:48	0:34:50
Ooh!	0:34:54	0:34:56
Oh! And then unsafely knocked off it.	0:34:56	0:34:59
Still only Adrian has actually made it to the centre.	0:35:00	0:35:04
Who's joining me next?	0:35:04	0:35:05
Now Smokin' Jo launches an attempt.	0:35:06	0:35:09
Nearly there...yes!	0:35:09	0:35:10
She's just redeemed herself having fallen off a ladder.	0:35:11	0:35:14
She's still not cleaning my windows!	0:35:14	0:35:16
So single Adrian and Smokin' Jo are through. Three places remain,	0:35:16	0:35:20
but who will fill them?	0:35:20	0:35:22
Will it be pompom Ellie, new-balls Barry, man-mountain Syed,	0:35:22	0:35:26
Katy the Lamb, luscious-lips Lisa, chest-hair Charlie,	0:35:26	0:35:30
PE Emily, Kim the copper, no-wally Ollie or Holy Jim?	0:35:30	0:35:35
Ollie...dashes across...	0:35:39	0:35:40
and, oh, not quite!	0:35:40	0:35:43
Here comes Holy Jim.	0:35:44	0:35:46
No! Within touching distance!	0:35:46	0:35:48
Oh, so close, Jim!	0:35:48	0:35:50
She's back already. Emily is on to the paddle this time.	0:35:50	0:35:53
Emily ducks the sweeping arm... and again...	0:35:54	0:35:57
..and again...	0:35:58	0:35:59
Come on, Emily!	0:35:59	0:36:00
She's going to have to run in a moment.	0:36:00	0:36:04
Oh, not that moment, though! Wrong one! I'm sure she'll be back for another go, though.	0:36:05	0:36:09
Here comes Kim the copper now.	0:36:09	0:36:12
Jo the fire-fighter has made it on. Can Kim join her?	0:36:12	0:36:16
Come on, Kim!	0:36:16	0:36:17
Oh! Call an ambulance!	0:36:19	0:36:21
-No-wally Ollie now sprints... and makes it! -Yes!	0:36:27	0:36:31
-That's three in the middle, two places left. -What a relief!	0:36:31	0:36:35
Katy the Lamb springs into action and she's across too. Effortless.	0:36:35	0:36:39
Four places taken now. When I say effortless, obviously, it wasn't, it was hard.	0:36:39	0:36:44
Just one place remains, but who will get there first? Will it be luscious-lips Lisa?	0:36:44	0:36:47
Man-mountain Syed? Kim the copper?	0:36:47	0:36:50
Holy Jim? Pompom Ellie?	0:36:50	0:36:52
PE Emily? New-balls Barry? Or chest-hair Charlie?	0:36:52	0:36:56
One place left!	0:36:56	0:36:58
Kim making a bid now.	0:36:58	0:37:00
Ooh!	0:37:01	0:37:02
OK!	0:37:02	0:37:03
Oh! And it was a losing bid!	0:37:03	0:37:06
Pompom Ellie runs along the paddle	0:37:06	0:37:08
and then veers off it.	0:37:08	0:37:10
Syed now, straight on and straight off.	0:37:10	0:37:12
Charlie looking good here...	0:37:13	0:37:15
No! Lost his balance at the last minute!	0:37:15	0:37:18
Come on, everyone,	0:37:18	0:37:19
or we'll need to send out for more AA batteries to keep the thing going!	0:37:19	0:37:23
OK, Syed's fully on the paddle this time.	0:37:23	0:37:25
If I blow you, you'll get there, Look.	0:37:25	0:37:26
Yeah! Anyway, Syed gets to his feet	0:37:27	0:37:30
and he's made it!	0:37:30	0:37:32
Yeah!	0:37:32	0:37:34
See? My blowing tactics worked!	0:37:35	0:37:38
OK, let's move on and leave her unawares.	0:37:38	0:37:40
So the final five have made it to the centre of Crash Mountain... eventually.	0:37:40	0:37:44
These five can celebrate.	0:37:44	0:37:47
But for the seven losers it's buenos noches, Buenos Aires.	0:37:47	0:37:51
I'm dreading going back to school on Monday, I'm really dreading it.	0:37:56	0:37:59
They're not going to let me live this down at all.	0:37:59	0:38:02
As the thing goes round,	0:38:02	0:38:03
it just doesn't hold my weight.	0:38:03	0:38:04
It actually gives a little bit,	0:38:04	0:38:06
I wasn't expecting that.	0:38:06	0:38:07
Unless I'm just too fat!	0:38:07	0:38:09
I'm so gutted I'm out. I was so close.	0:38:10	0:38:12
I gave it my best shot, and, yeah, I crashed out.	0:38:12	0:38:16
It was basically an experiment that went wrong on my behalf.	0:38:16	0:38:20
Today the fire-fighter came out on top.	0:38:22	0:38:24
In reality, the girls in blue do it all the time.	0:38:24	0:38:26
I think Adrian's going to win. perhaps,	0:38:26	0:38:29
but it would be nice to see our good brother and friend	0:38:29	0:38:31
just have a wee slip, that would be nice!	0:38:31	0:38:33
Forgive and forget, surely, Jim?	0:38:34	0:38:37
Anyway, let's not worry about that lot. They're losers!	0:38:37	0:38:40
Time to focus on the winners. And I've got to say my money is on Adrian.	0:38:40	0:38:43
Fastest on the Qualifier and the first to ascend Crash Mountain.	0:38:43	0:38:46
I bet my recently won fiver that he wins this thing.	0:38:46	0:38:50
No, I bet a fiver and my car and my house and the shirt off my back	0:38:50	0:38:54
that Adrian wins today's show. Easy money! Time for Dizzy Dummies!	0:38:54	0:38:59
Here's how it works. The five remaining contestants are strapped into that fast-rotating machine	0:39:05	0:39:10
for as long as Argentinean laws permit.	0:39:10	0:39:13
Then, dizzy, sick and confused,	0:39:13	0:39:15
they will all receive a good hosing as they make their way to the carousel goal.	0:39:15	0:39:19
After getting over the goalposts, they must cross the lubed-up pipe bridge...	0:39:19	0:39:24
The first four across then have to go through the same again,	0:39:24	0:39:27
except this time, instead of the pipe bridge they must get across the Blueberries	0:39:27	0:39:31
whilst getting dodgeballed in the noggin.	0:39:31	0:39:34
The last contestant is eliminated, leaving behind today's Wipeout finalists.	0:39:34	0:39:37
The Qualifier? Kind of tricky. Crash Mountain? Taking the mickey!	0:39:40	0:39:44
Dizzy Dummies? Yeah, you've guessed it! Time to get sicky!	0:39:44	0:39:48
Are you all ready?	0:39:48	0:39:50
Pass the sick bag! Three, two, one!	0:39:52	0:39:55
HOOTER	0:39:55	0:39:57
Right, a reminder of today's five Dizzy Dummies...	0:39:57	0:40:00
He won the Qualifier, he was first on to Crash Mountain, he's really good. It's single Adrian!	0:40:01	0:40:07
She's a fire-fighter and part-time window cleaner...	0:40:07	0:40:09
and, yeah, she fell off a ladder in the Qualifier, it's Smoking' Jo!	0:40:09	0:40:13
Adrian, your fire's going right out!	0:40:13	0:40:15
He's blasted his way through to Dizzy Dummies, it's man-mountain Syed.	0:40:16	0:40:21
Bangladesh!	0:40:21	0:40:22
She's Allan's daughter and Larry's sister, it's Katy the Lamb.	0:40:22	0:40:26
Prepare to be bowled over!	0:40:26	0:40:28
He's a cross between Alfie Moon and a ninja, well, according to him anyway! It's no-wally Ollie!	0:40:28	0:40:33
My name's Ollie and I'm no wally!	0:40:33	0:40:34
The Dummies are released.	0:40:42	0:40:44
And, as predicted, Adrian is off to a flyer!	0:40:44	0:40:47
The stragglers are still getting a hosing, but Adrian's up and already over the goalpost.	0:40:47	0:40:52
My bet's looking good!	0:40:52	0:40:54
Single Adrian on to the pipe bridge.	0:40:54	0:40:56
Waddles along...	0:40:56	0:40:58
Oh! I wonder what caused him to fall there!	0:40:59	0:41:01
Oh, yeah! Could be all the grease. Doesn't make it any easier.	0:41:01	0:41:06
Back at the carousel, Joe falls, this time, though, not from a ladder.	0:41:06	0:41:09
Syed and Katie...	0:41:09	0:41:11
synchronised falling! It's like Torvill and Dean at their peak... sort of.	0:41:11	0:41:16
Top marks.	0:41:16	0:41:18
Now, Ollie's over the goalposts too, whilst everyone else falls around him.	0:41:18	0:41:23
Ollie on the pipes.	0:41:23	0:41:25
Slips...on the grease once again, looking a bit of a wally there if we're honest, Ollie.	0:41:25	0:41:30
5-foot-2 Syed having a problem with the goalpost.	0:41:30	0:41:33
Being small is nothing to laugh at, Amanda!	0:41:33	0:41:37
Syed!	0:41:38	0:41:39
Go on, Syed, show her!	0:41:40	0:41:41
No!	0:41:42	0:41:44
I meant, show her how good small folk can be, not show her how to fall into the water!	0:41:44	0:41:48
Never mind!	0:41:48	0:41:50
Adrian, the coolest cucumber in town!	0:41:53	0:41:56
Oh!	0:41:56	0:41:57
I think his cucumber just got a bit cooler.	0:41:59	0:42:01
Ollie seems to be taking a little tea break here.	0:42:04	0:42:07
He isn't quite demonstrating the urgency required. Come on!	0:42:07	0:42:10
Go on! Go on!	0:42:11	0:42:13
Or the balance!	0:42:14	0:42:15
Smokin' Jo makes a dash for it...	0:42:17	0:42:19
And she's nearly there! Hold on, Jo!	0:42:20	0:42:22
-And Jo becomes the first person to make it to safety. -She's on fire!	0:42:25	0:42:30
Now Katy jumps for it.	0:42:30	0:42:31
-Can she hold on? -Oh!	0:42:31	0:42:34
Slowly edges up on to the pontoon. Yes!	0:42:34	0:42:37
Mr Lamb, she's done you proud!	0:42:37	0:42:40
Yeah!	0:42:40	0:42:42
Looks like she even surprised herself with that!	0:42:42	0:42:45
Both of our girls are through to the next round...of Dizzy Dummies.	0:42:50	0:42:54
I'll be honest...I'm a teensy bit concerned about my bet on Adrian now. I'm sure it'll be fine.	0:42:54	0:42:59
It'll be OK.	0:42:59	0:43:00
OK, so now Ollie's across too.	0:43:00	0:43:03
Oh, Adrian's down again!	0:43:03	0:43:04
Oh, my goodness, Syed's about to beat Adrian!	0:43:04	0:43:08
-Go on, Syed! -I'm guessing that gap must look pretty huge when you're 5 foot 2!	0:43:08	0:43:12
I'm taller than that, by the way!	0:43:12	0:43:14
-I can't jump that far! -You've got to jump, man, you've got to jump!	0:43:14	0:43:17
Syed is now a couple of feet away from defeating today's strongest contestant so far,	0:43:17	0:43:22
but he needs to make this jump. He needs to do this!	0:43:22	0:43:24
He's brave, he's going to do it...	0:43:25	0:43:27
And he's...done it!	0:43:32	0:43:35
Incredible! The man mountain rocks the Dizzy Dummies!	0:43:35	0:43:39
I do not believe this!	0:43:43	0:43:45
That is the look of a man who has literally been beaten...	0:43:47	0:43:52
You must be absolutely gutted,	0:43:54	0:43:56
because I know, from speaking to you this morning, that you had every intention	0:43:56	0:43:59
of beating all of the girls, and two chicks have just beaten you, Adrian!	0:43:59	0:44:03
It was the Vaseline on the...	0:44:03	0:44:05
on the... No, it was. Look, my hand's all greasy... Do you want some?	0:44:05	0:44:09
The girls had the Vaseline too!	0:44:09	0:44:12
Yeah, but... I did say the girls won't win it, so...	0:44:12	0:44:15
-..Syed or Ollie...I'm still going to put my money on them! -Adrian!	0:44:16	0:44:19
Message to my wife. "We're staying in the Tewkesbury Travelodge tonight.	0:44:21	0:44:24
"And you're going to have to pick me up."	0:44:24	0:44:26
Can we get on with the second round of Dizzy Dummies, please? I'm getting cold in here, really.	0:44:26	0:44:30
Round 2. There's more vomit-inducing horror at the beginning, but this time the course culminates	0:44:33	0:44:38
in the Blueberries!	0:44:38	0:44:40
And so off they wobble.	0:44:44	0:44:46
Jo and Katy charge up the slope and slide back down it.	0:44:46	0:44:50
Oh, look at this! Man-mountain Syed, first over the goalposts!	0:44:50	0:44:54
It's madness on the carousel, but Ollie's now over too!	0:44:54	0:44:56
Talk about the underdog!	0:44:57	0:44:59
Never write off the vertically challenged, Amanda! He'll be back!	0:44:59	0:45:04
Ollie on to the Blueberries...	0:45:04	0:45:06
..for a split second.	0:45:07	0:45:08
Now Katie...	0:45:08	0:45:09
Something tells me we're going to be here for a while!	0:45:09	0:45:11
A terrific leap from Jo!	0:45:16	0:45:18
Overshot the Blueberry, but managed to hang on.	0:45:20	0:45:23
Katie tries the same aggressive approach. Doesn't work so well for her.	0:45:23	0:45:28
Despite the dastardly dodgeballs, Smokin' Jo's crawling her way across the troublesome Blueberries!	0:45:31	0:45:35
Come on, then!	0:45:35	0:45:37
Fighting talk from the fire-fighter!	0:45:37	0:45:40
Behind her, Ollie's now successfully on the Blueberries.	0:45:40	0:45:43
Ooh, fantastic leap as Smokin' Jo launches herself into the Wipeout Zone!	0:45:44	0:45:50
-Sssss! -The fire-fighter's sizzling!	0:45:50	0:45:53
Syed, still struggling.	0:45:53	0:45:56
Oh, Syed!	0:45:56	0:45:57
# They laugh at me, these fellows, just because I am small	0:45:57	0:46:01
# They laugh at me because I'm not 100 feet tall... #	0:46:03	0:46:06
I'm not holding out much hope for poor little Syed.	0:46:08	0:46:11
Katie's looking to take advantage of the man mountain's misfortune.	0:46:11	0:46:14
And she's finally on.	0:46:14	0:46:16
Ollie, now, nearly across...	0:46:18	0:46:19
No-wally Ollie joins Jo in the Wipeout Zone.	0:46:19	0:46:23
That's ill-advised! I wouldn't have done that!	0:46:25	0:46:28
Now Katie's on her last Blueberry,	0:46:28	0:46:30
but she's very wary of those dodgeballs!	0:46:30	0:46:33
Syed still trying to mount the Blueberries to no avail...	0:46:33	0:46:36
The dodgeballers wait for no-one.	0:46:36	0:46:38
Katie psychs herself up for one big leap...	0:46:41	0:46:44
And she's done it! Katy the Lamb grabs the final spot in the Wipeout Zone	0:46:45	0:46:51
which means it's goodbye to the man mountain.	0:46:51	0:46:54
You know what, you're only very lickle and I don't think you stood a chance on that particular obstacle!	0:46:55	0:47:00
Yeah, yeah, it was much harder than it looked, yeah.	0:47:00	0:47:03
-You did Bangladesh proud! -Yeah...	0:47:03	0:47:05
I tried my best, yeah...	0:47:05	0:47:07
I hope I have made Bangladesh proud, yeah...	0:47:07	0:47:10
So fire-fighter Smokin' Jo, student no-wally Ollie and marketing executive Katy the Lamb	0:47:10	0:47:16
have made it through to today's final round, the Wipeout Zone.	0:47:16	0:47:20
And like me, making my way home from our last office party,	0:47:20	0:47:23
they've had to overcome water, greased-up poles and giant blueberries to get there!	0:47:23	0:47:27
And for that, we salute them!	0:47:27	0:47:29
It's so strange to think there's two girls through and a guy.	0:47:33	0:47:37
The boys were, like, "We've got it in the bag. It's going to be an all-guy final!"	0:47:40	0:47:44
And here we are, and it's me and Jo through!	0:47:44	0:47:47
Really feeling the pressure that there's two girls in the final.	0:47:47	0:47:50
Jo, in particular, I'm very scared of. She's got long legs and she's beaten me in the previous rounds.	0:47:50	0:47:56
To actually compete against a lot of men, you know, I have done that, I'm used to that...	0:47:56	0:48:02
Jo's a lot older than me. On paper, that would make me think I've got a good chance against Jo.	0:48:02	0:48:05
I am sporty...	0:48:05	0:48:07
but I'm 44! I've got children the same age as some of these contestants!	0:48:07	0:48:12
And let's see what happens with Ollie!	0:48:12	0:48:14
Ollie's got his game face on and I think he's going to try his very best for the boys!	0:48:16	0:48:21
Katie's a bit of shock for me being in the final.	0:48:21	0:48:24
She's very competitive. I think she's planning to win this tonight.	0:48:24	0:48:27
Katie's brilliant, you know, she's really pulled the stops out!	0:48:27	0:48:32
I would absolutely love to beat Ollie and Jo.	0:48:32	0:48:35
-It's about winning. -It's down to me to beat these girls!	0:48:37	0:48:40
To be honest, I'm just going to go out there and give it my best.	0:48:40	0:48:42
Holding that cup up at the end of the day and saying, you know, "It's me that's won this!"	0:48:42	0:48:47
So this is it...the pinnacle, the apex, the peak, the summit...	0:48:52	0:48:57
the highlight, the zenith... I've got a new thesaurus app on my phone.	0:48:57	0:49:02
Sorry...Angry Birds.	0:49:05	0:49:07
Anyway, what I was trying to build to is, it's the Wipeout Zone!	0:49:09	0:49:12
First it's the Killer Surf with only a rubber ring for comfort.	0:49:21	0:49:24
Then it's the hike of hell up the Rapid Climb	0:49:24	0:49:27
where they've got just ten seconds to make it to the top	0:49:27	0:49:29
before a Tidal Wave is unleashed upon them.	0:49:29	0:49:31
Then balance is everything on the Seesaw Of Truth.	0:49:31	0:49:35
From there they'll have to duck and dive to avoid the Crazy Sweeper.	0:49:35	0:49:39
Then it's the Rope Swing on to the Turntable	0:49:39	0:49:41
and a final leap to the finish podium where the clock stops.	0:49:41	0:49:44
The fastest round the course will be crowned Total Wipeout champion	0:49:44	0:49:48
and walk away with £10,000.	0:49:48	0:49:51
What a line-up we have tonight!	0:49:51	0:49:54
A girl, a boy and another girl.	0:49:54	0:49:57
Did I mention we've got two girls and a boy, as in 100% more girl than boy?	0:49:57	0:50:01
Not that I'm showing any favouritism! Katie is the first to go...	0:50:01	0:50:05
who, by the way, is a girl.	0:50:05	0:50:08
It's the cricketer's daughter versus the mother of all assault courses.	0:50:11	0:50:15
This one's for the family!	0:50:15	0:50:16
HOOTER	0:50:18	0:50:20
So Katie gets the Wipeout Zone underway.	0:50:20	0:50:23
She's in and swimming.	0:50:31	0:50:33
But quickly on to the Rapid Climb.	0:50:34	0:50:36
The minute she gets on to that ramp,	0:50:36	0:50:38
the 10-second Tidal Wave countdown will begin.	0:50:38	0:50:41
-And there it is! -That's it, Katie!	0:50:41	0:50:43
Run for it!	0:50:43	0:50:44
Katie is taking Amanda's advice	0:50:44	0:50:45
she's quickly up the ramp, totally avoiding the Tidal Wave.	0:50:45	0:50:48
Come on, Katie, girl.	0:50:48	0:50:50
And Katie progresses to the Seesaw Of Truth,	0:50:50	0:50:53
trying to balance with her heart pounding	0:50:53	0:50:56
and the roar of water in her ears...	0:50:56	0:50:58
The seesaw tips, Katie's looking good.	0:50:58	0:51:03
Being cautious and needs to be. Next, the Crazy Sweeper.	0:51:04	0:51:07
It's all about timing this right.	0:51:07	0:51:09
Oh, a near miss there, but Katie survives it,	0:51:09	0:51:13
managing to duck the Crazy Sweeper.	0:51:13	0:51:16
Back on her feet, up and running for it.	0:51:16	0:51:18
Come on, Katie, hurry up!	0:51:18	0:51:20
That's it!	0:51:21	0:51:22
Go, go, go!	0:51:22	0:51:24
Oh! No, the Sweeper was simply too quick and Katie just kind of threw herself into the water there.	0:51:24	0:51:30
-I think she just jumped off that. -That makes two of us, Amanda.	0:51:34	0:51:37
I think she just got out of its way at the last second.	0:51:37	0:51:40
Right, Rope Swing now. Katie prepares herself for a giant leap!	0:51:40	0:51:44
She's holding on tight.	0:51:44	0:51:46
And she makes it!	0:51:46	0:51:48
One jump to go and it's all over. Come on!	0:51:48	0:51:50
Oh, hang on, Katie!	0:51:50	0:51:52
She does, and completes the Wipeout Zone in a very fast time.	0:51:52	0:51:56
A great run.	0:51:56	0:51:57
Katy the Lamb barely put a foot wrong the whole way round,	0:52:01	0:52:04
except for that voluntary fall on the Crazy Sweeper,	0:52:04	0:52:07
but will her time be enough to beat Jo and Ollie?	0:52:07	0:52:10
Did you enjoy that?	0:52:12	0:52:13
Oh...part...the...	0:52:13	0:52:17
I'm not understanding a word you're saying, but it doesn't matter because you did really well.	0:52:17	0:52:20
You've just done that in 2 minutes and 34 seconds.	0:52:20	0:52:24
-Oh! -That's a brilliant time, but you do know that Ollie and Jo are coming up next,	0:52:24	0:52:30
-they're both equally determined... -It's going to be amazing. -Ollie's up next. Let's watch.	0:52:30	0:52:35
50% Alfie Moon, 50% ninja, 0% wally, it's no-wally Ollie!	0:52:37	0:52:42
My name's Ollie Beasant and I'm doing this for everyone I know and love.	0:52:43	0:52:46
Wish me luck!	0:52:46	0:52:48
HE SCREAMS	0:52:48	0:52:51
Trademark scream there!	0:52:57	0:52:59
The flying Ollie!	0:52:59	0:53:01
And now it's a climbing Ollie!	0:53:01	0:53:03
He's on to the Rapid Climb, so the 10-second countdown begins.	0:53:04	0:53:07
Ollie literally making big strides here,	0:53:07	0:53:09
and like Katie he beats the wave.	0:53:09	0:53:12
Whoo!	0:53:12	0:53:14
No problem for no-wally Ollie, avoiding the horror of the Tidal Wave.	0:53:14	0:53:18
On to the Seesaw... Ollie waits for it to tip.	0:53:19	0:53:22
Ooh, a little wobble, but he's still on, he's made it.	0:53:22	0:53:24
Next it's the Crazy Sweeper.	0:53:24	0:53:27
This is where Katy the Lamb made her one mistake on her run.	0:53:27	0:53:31
Ollie legs it but that spinning arm is already closing in.	0:53:31	0:53:34
He's going to have to duck soon.	0:53:34	0:53:37
Or maybe he's not!	0:53:37	0:53:39
Because he's made it!	0:53:39	0:53:40
Incredible! Ollie makes it in one!	0:53:40	0:53:42
He's yet to make a single mistake.	0:53:42	0:53:44
He's only got the Rope Swing and the Turntable to go.	0:53:44	0:53:46
He swings out...still holding on...	0:53:48	0:53:51
Oh, a heavy landing! This is looking fast!	0:53:51	0:53:55
Ollie's on the Turntable, he lines himself up...	0:53:55	0:53:57
..jumps, and that is a flawless run from Ollie!	0:53:58	0:54:00
1 minute 20 seconds, that's incredible!	0:54:00	0:54:03
Yes!	0:54:03	0:54:04
Now, there is a lesson in how to do the Wipeout Zone!	0:54:06	0:54:08
Ollie blasts his way past every obstacle without a second thought.	0:54:08	0:54:12
Definitely part Ninja and no wally at all!	0:54:12	0:54:15
It's over to Amanda to tell Ollie his spectacular time.	0:54:15	0:54:18
-You went like a bullet! -Thanks very much, thanks very much!	0:54:18	0:54:22
-Fast and accurate, that's me. -I kind of blinked and I think I might have missed it! -Oh, really?	0:54:22	0:54:27
-I don't think it was that fast! -He's been doing it for the boys tonight.	0:54:27	0:54:31
-Yeah. -Ollie...	0:54:31	0:54:32
you're one step closer to making them proud, because you were faster than Katie!	0:54:32	0:54:38
-Hard luck, Katie. Go join the others, my darling. -Good luck. -Well done!	0:54:38	0:54:42
-Only Jo to go. -And it means yours is the time to beat, so let's watch Jo.	0:54:42	0:54:46
Let's do it. Good luck, Jo.	0:54:46	0:54:48
Here comes the final contender, Smokin' Jo.	0:54:51	0:54:54
Careful on that ladder, obviously!	0:54:54	0:54:55
This is for you, Josie and Julie!	0:54:58	0:55:01
Now, Jo has Ollie's time to beat, and at 1 minute 20 seconds, that is not going to be easy.	0:55:01	0:55:08
That's an astonishing time in front of her.	0:55:08	0:55:11
Out of the ring, into the water. It's a swim	0:55:12	0:55:15
then the Rapid Climb first of all.	0:55:15	0:55:17
She's up quickly. But Jo's going to have to keep that speed up.	0:55:18	0:55:22
The Tidal Wave won't get a look-in if she's fast enough.	0:55:22	0:55:25
10 seconds, remember.	0:55:25	0:55:26
Oh, she's taking it steady on the steep sections.	0:55:28	0:55:31
Oh, no, she's slipped!	0:55:31	0:55:33
And she's sliding...	0:55:33	0:55:35
And that means the wave is going to hit her! She's going to get caught.	0:55:35	0:55:39
She's past it, that's good.	0:55:39	0:55:41
Jo sticks close to the edge and misses the worst of it,	0:55:44	0:55:47
but the seconds are ebbing away...	0:55:47	0:55:49
along with Jo's chances of winning Total Wipeout!	0:55:49	0:55:53
On to the Seesaw Of Truth.	0:55:53	0:55:54
Jo looks steady on her feet,	0:55:54	0:55:56
but how will she handle the tipping point in the middle?	0:55:56	0:55:59
That's critical. She's past it. Nicely done.	0:55:59	0:56:02
Quickly on to the Crazy Sweeper.	0:56:02	0:56:04
She's going to have to go like the wind.	0:56:04	0:56:06
This is make or break for Smokin' Jo.	0:56:06	0:56:08
A big mistake here and her title challenge is all over.	0:56:08	0:56:11
Judging speeds, distances... the best time to run...	0:56:11	0:56:14
Oh, she's ducked.	0:56:14	0:56:16
Come on, Jo, come on!	0:56:16	0:56:17
She ducks a second time and this has to be it!	0:56:22	0:56:24
She's got to get a move on... No, she's ducking again!	0:56:24	0:56:27
Don't forget, Jo has no idea of the time pressure she's under.	0:56:27	0:56:30
She didn't see Ollie's incredible run.	0:56:30	0:56:33
Big push now on to the podiums...	0:56:33	0:56:35
Oh, that was not Jo's best foot forwards there.	0:56:35	0:56:39
So nearly out of the Sweeper's reach and on to the Rope Swing, Jo's chances of winning are already over.	0:56:39	0:56:44
She just can't catch Ollie now.	0:56:44	0:56:47
Ollie can't believe his luck, or rather Jo's lack of it.	0:56:47	0:56:49
Jo is up and on to the Rope Swing,	0:56:49	0:56:52
good swing, great landing...	0:56:52	0:56:53
Let go of the rope, woman!	0:56:55	0:56:57
Oh, maybe I spoke too soon!	0:56:57	0:56:59
-Things going from bad to worse for Smokin' Jo. -No, she didn't!	0:56:59	0:57:02
Oh, yes, she did!	0:57:02	0:57:04
Sorry, this isn't pantomime, is it?	0:57:04	0:57:06
Come on, Jo, come on!	0:57:06	0:57:08
For Jo encouragement from the crowd!	0:57:08	0:57:10
She's got her eye on that button. A quick jump...slaps the button	0:57:10	0:57:13
and overshoots!	0:57:13	0:57:15
Great effort from Jo, but Ollie's time was always going to be hard to beat.	0:57:15	0:57:18
A slip of the Crazy Sweeper and a trip on the Turntable	0:57:18	0:57:21
plus that overenthusiastic finish all mean she posts a time of 3 minutes and 14 seconds.	0:57:21	0:57:28
Oh, my goodness! Fantastic performance from you, my love!	0:57:28	0:57:32
That was amazing! A few slips and trips, but, yeah, I got here!	0:57:32	0:57:36
-You had some ups and downs. -Absolutely!	0:57:36	0:57:39
And you've had some ups and downs all day,	0:57:39	0:57:41
but you kept fighting your way through all the way through just like a fire-fighter should.	0:57:41	0:57:45
-Oh, absolutely. I can't give up. -Oh, listen...	0:57:45	0:57:48
Ollie's been fantastic tonight, you have been incredible...	0:57:48	0:57:51
-Your kids will be so proud of you tonight, Jo... -I hope so.	0:57:51	0:57:55
But your fire has been extinguished, I'm afraid,	0:57:55	0:57:58
because, Ollie, you are the Total Wipeout champion!	0:57:58	0:58:02
Yeah!	0:58:03	0:58:04
Well done, my man!	0:58:04	0:58:06
So, 21-year-old business student Ollie Beasant from Swindon is today's Total Wipeout champion.	0:58:09	0:58:15
And he is most certainly not a wally.	0:58:15	0:58:17
But he is a buffoon, a nincompoop, an imbecile, a dufus...	0:58:17	0:58:23
It's a great app! That's all for today, but join me next time,	0:58:23	0:58:26
when there'll be some people falling off things,	0:58:26	0:58:28
some other people falling off things	0:58:28	0:58:30
and, in a Total Wipeout exclusive,	0:58:30	0:58:32
there will be some people falling off things!	0:58:32	0:58:35
From Amanda and me, goodbye.	0:58:35	0:58:37
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd	0:58:42	0:58:46
E-mail [email protected]	0:58:46	0:58:50

Episode 4 Total Wipeout

Similar Content

Entertainment

Games & Quizzes

Obstacle course

Series 4

Total Wipeout

Episode 3

Episode 5

Transcript

Download Subtitles

SRT

ASS