North East Fish Great British Menu

Britain's best chefs are bringing out their funny sides on this year's Great British Menu.

This week, it's a re-match between three of the North East's most talented chefs.

-Returning champion Colin McGurran...

-Simplicity is not simple.

-..rustic chef Charlie Lakin...

-Bring it on!

-..and determined returner Stephanie Moon...

-I'm going steady.

..are fighting for the opportunity to serve witty, playful dishes

at a special banquet celebrating 25 years of Red Nose Day.

In yesterday's starter course, Colin thought technical wizardry would put him ahead of the game.

-Is this dish going to make me smile?

-I think it ticks all the boxes.

-But when the scores came in...

-Seven.

-..he was left deflated

-when he had to share the top spot with Stephanie.

-I think my dish was the best out of all three.

-Charlie's gag on a plate received a stony response.

-My breath's been taken away for the first time here.

Today, it's the fish course and Colin is intent on victory.

-You're not letting go of that crown.

-Once you've got it, you want it again.

-Charlie hopes to turn yesterday's tragedy into comedy.

-I have to start catching back up.

But he has a tough fight on his hands.

Anything but banquet is failure!

This year's challenge is to create a gastronomic performance on a plate, a dazzling dish

that will make people smile.

The chefs have joined forces with Britain's best loved entertainers.

Would anybody like to come and buy a pie?

And undergone all kinds of wild and wacky challenges to raise a laugh and raise some much needed cash

to support Comic Relief.

CHEERING

Judging the chefs in the fish course today is former Great British Menu champion,

straight-talking Jason Atherton.

On the starters, the humour was there. On the fish course, I'd like to see them pushing the boundaries.

This is the hardest thing to get right. They've got to put humour into it, but also keep it simple.

I'm two points behind. I've got my weak dish out of the way.

No-one's really in front and it's my opportunity to claw them points back.

I'm delighted with my score.

Today is a new day, so you've just got to keep striving for perfection.

First up on seven points is third-time returner Stephanie.

Currently in the lead with the defending champion, she's flying high.

Joint first, what a place to be in! Going into the fish course,

my fish course carries on a similar vein to my starter. It is humorous, it is funny.

I just want to keep winning!

You've got a lot of stuff in that box. Start going through it all.

-I'm making Whitby crab custard pie.

-Custard pie?

-Yeah.

-It's a fish course.

-It's basically a crab tartlet. I've put fennel pollen in the tartlet.

I've got fresh wasabi.

That's going to be grated with the brown crab meat, then rolled in fresh pea dust.

It will look like wasabi peas, but it will have brown crab meat in the centre.

Are you sure and confident you've hit the brief?

Has this got enough humour, but it's also serious cooking?

I've worked hard to make sure the pastry is razor-thin, the crab is nice and sweet.

I'm serving it on a porcelain hand, so it looks like a pie in the face, just for a bit of fun.

Stephanie is hitting the comedy brief with her crab custard pie,

but has she compromised the gastronomy

with her many flavour combinations?

Stephanie's dish is a custard pie.

Will it be substantial enough? Steph's using fresh wasabi.

She'll have to be extremely careful not to overpower the other flavours.

Next up is former champion Colin.

He scored a seven with his starter yesterday and he is intent on maintaining his lead.

I got a very low score in my eyes, but if I deliver this fish perfectly, it should get a high score.

-So, Colin, name your dish.

-Salmon, cockles and mussels.

It's the flavours of the North Sea, using wonderful ingredients.

We'll simply cook the salmon using the Japanese influences

of flavours like dashi, bonito. It's fantastic and goes well with fish.

If we want to get as much flavour into a fish dish without changing the ingredient, this is the one for me.

They're good at cooking fish because they keep it simple.

To finish it, we've got a garnish of potato crackers.

It's very fine potato sheets that we're going to paint with nori,

deep-fry it, it will puff up and be like a cracker.

That's right up my street. My food is part Asian.

-Steph, you've got a few Japanese ingredients. Have you guys been conversing?

-No.

-What's the humour?

This won't be a hilarious dish. It will be a charming dish.

Eating of the dish will carry the satisfaction through.

Out to win again, Colin has forgone the comedy

and focused on gastronomy with salmon, mussels

and a sea rock infused with bold Japanese flavours.

I love Japanese food. Colin's dish sounds amazing.

I hope he's really pushed the boundaries because I want to give somebody a nine or a ten.

Finally, it's risk-taker Charlie whose controversial dish yesterday got him off to a poor start

with a score of five points.

The first course, that was my demon. Today's strategy is just nailing it.

I can't afford for it to be anything but perfect.

-Hi, Charlie. Name the dish.

-My dish is tongue in cheek.

I'm using cod heads. I'm taking the cheeks off, the tongues out.

What works really well with it is a pig jowl and I'll serve that with a reduction of cider,

a few capers, a few chives, so I'm looking for a tartare sauce sort of flavour.

I'm sitting it on a crisp scallion rosti.

-Some cod's roe in here?

-I've dried them down and I'll mix them with breadcrumbs, dried chives,

-to roll the cheek through and deep-fry that.

-Where's the humour?

Mainly in the title. It's an enjoyable dish. It brings happiness to the soul.

You've got this beautiful cod's head which most chefs throw away. Why not a nice piece of the fillet?

You're taking the mickey a bit if you use prime ingredients for everything. Let's save a bit of cash.

Back to serious cooking.

Hoping to redeem himself with cheffy surf and turf,

Charlie's cod cheeks and crispy pig jowl need to be a winner

if he is to remain a serious contender.

There's a lot of powerful flavours going on there.

A big slab of pork sat there - will that overpower the cod cheeks?

He's got to balance that properly.

Cooking is well under way. Colin is making an oyster emulsion which he will use to decorate his sea rocks

and Charlie is prepping his cuts for his surf and turf,

but with the two chefs out in front using Asian ingredients, he's feeling uneasy.

You've both got a Japanese influence. You think it could be to your advantage?

Jason said it's something he really enjoys.

I'm using it because it's very, very tasty. It complements fish wonderfully.

Stephanie has made fennel-infused pastry cases for her pies

and is now grating fresh wasabi for her peas.

Out to impress with flavour, she's keen to get the opinion of the boys.

-Guys, come and have a try of this fresh wasabi.

-Is it going to burn my head off?

-No.

-I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.

-I burned my head off on wasabi once.

-I couldn't taste anything for a few days.

-This is delicate and sweet.

-It's hot, but not crazy hot. I like it.

-Yeah, it's a nice flavour.

- I like that. - Milder than a normal wasabi, yeah.

I love the colour as well. Isn't that groovy?

The guys have got Asian influences, but I'm staying true to who I am.

As Charlie gets to work on his very English cider reduction,

he lets his fellow chefs know he's not one to go down without a fight.

For me, it's a course where I start catching back up.

You've got two guys snapping at your heels. We want your crown of North East champ.

That's why I've got to dig deep to try and break away.

That's my strategy. Once you've got it, you want it again.

Colin is out to deliver a first-class dish, but he's keeping his salmon quite straightforward

by cooking it in its own juices.

In this course, simplicity is the beauty. Simplicity is not simple. That's the key factor.

If I get it right, I might be able to get some good scores.

-You're jumping a bit ahead.

-I know. I'm thinking positive. I need to get ahead.

For you, anything but banquet is failure!

Colin's going into himself a little bit on this one.

I saw it last year. He's going into himself and he's going to pull it out of the bag.

Colin is making his salmon tartare with an infusion of Japanese flavours,

something that should impress Jason.

-Colin, how are we getting on?

-On track again. I just made my tartare.

-Has that got the...?

-Bit of bonito in there.

Sometimes tartares are nice, but they don't hold a great deal of flavour.

Trying to sell salmon to the public is difficult because it's become an everyday protein.

As a professional chef, how are you going to make that better?

It is a beautiful piece of fish, very flaky, very textural, so I'm going to just gently confit it,

then finish it in the pan, so it will be a bit pink inside.

-OK?

-Great.

-Thank you.

Across the kitchen, Stephanie's crab custard pie is a potential banquet-winning dish.

Her custard filling is a mix of crab meat and cream

and infused with crab shells for enhanced flavour.

Next, she moves on to her wasabi peas. Her flavours must deliver if she's going to impress Jason.

-So, Steph, where are we?

-Basically, I've grated fresh wasabi.

-Strong, right?

-Yeah, it is. Along with some fresh lime, brown crab meat and Ultra-tex just to thicken it.

It's a kind of a wasabi hit that when it's rolled through the pea dust,

it adds a bit of a hit of something hot to the sweetness of the crab.

-With fresh wasabi, you've got to be extra-careful. It can be super-hot.

-Yeah, I'm going steady, chef.

I'm quite intrigued with these peas. Show me how you do one.

Take a tray and pipe a very small dot of wasabi, brown crab,

and then set it on here,

then roll it in the dust, very small like a pea. I roll them again afterwards, then it looks like a pea.

-A pea with a kick!

-If this dish gets through to the banquet, you'll need a lot of hands to do enough peas.

I've learnt my lesson from the last course, I think.

My fish course, I think Jason likes the ingredients, I think he's expecting a lot from it

and I think it's up to me to deliver that,

so the pressure, as always in this game, the pressure is on.

As well as going all-out to win the competition,

the chefs are also taking part in fund-raising challenges this year to raise money for Comic Relief.

To get feedback on her crab custard pie,

Stephanie is packing up her dish to take to Harrogate Bakers' Fair

to have it judged at the annual baking competition.

I'm really looking forward to it. I think it will be a tough crowd, they'll be quite harsh.

But we'll finish off with a bit of good, old-fashioned charity fund-raising, all for Comic Relief,

with a custard pie toss.

I know it's going to get ugly and messy, but I'm up for the challenge.

For passionate baker Stephanie, the fair is the perfect place to road-test her pie

and pull in the crowds for her custard pie fund-raiser.

Joining her in her fund-raising challenge is someone from the North East who knows about having fun -

TV presenter Kirsten O'Brien.

-Hello.

-Hello.

-Kirsten, how are you doing?

-Fine.

-Nice to meet you.

-Is this us then?

-This is us.

It's looking good. I'm afraid, Kirsten, because it's Comic Relief,

-we want to try and make this funny, so unfortunately...

-Can you see the slow dawning on my face there?

-It's getting a bit wet and messy.

-I thought I'd given that up in my kids' telly career. It's back!

But before the fun starts, Kirsten has also made a pie

and it's time for both women to put their dishes under the scrutiny of Harrogate's top baking judges.

-I'm quite nervous for this. Hello.

-Hello.

-Hi.

-We've brought a couple of pies for you to taste.

We've got two very different pies here.

This is a crab custard pie.

And next to that, here is the Comic Relief!

-Sweet lemon meringue?

-Yes.

OK, shall we try the savoury first...?

-I didn't expect that flavour.

-I wouldn't have put crab with egg custard.

-But that works for me.

-I think that's a winner.

-Yeah, I do.

Yay!

-We've got to try this lemon meringue pie.

-It can only be downhill now, can't it?

-I think the pastry's dodge.

-LAUGHTER

When you bake it, that's the face you want. You want someone to slightly gag.

The pastry you need to work on.

-I'm drooling. I never got the chance to try that. Can I give it a go?

-Go for it, Kirsten.

-Oh, it's really nice.

-There we go.

LAUGHTER

It's got "Best in Show". I can't complain. If I can get that on the day in London, I'll be really happy.

Confident her crab custard pie has what it takes, it's time to raise some much-needed cash.

-Here we go.

-First in line for a throw, some familiar faces.

I'm really sorry about this, ladies.

-It's not a fair fight.

-Sorry!

With Stephanie and Kirsten in the firing line, they're soon raising plenty of cash.

It's been great hanging out with Steph today.

And it's great being from the North East, supporting my girl. I really hope she goes all the way.

We really got into it. We've raised loads of money.

But the thing I'm most looking forward to right now is sticking my hair under the tap

because I smell like sour cream and it's horrible.

If you've been inspired to do your bit for Comic Relief and you enjoy eating out,

the easy way to get involved is through Menu Relief. Find out more at bbc.co.uk/rednoseday

and learn about other ways to help raise money too.

Back in the kitchen, the chefs are hard at work.

Stephanie is on the lemon mayonnaise for her custard pie-style topping.

Colin is determined to impress with flavours and is using dashi, a Japanese stock,

to make starfish jellies for his salmon, cockles and mussels dish.

And for Charlie, the pressure's on after yesterday's failure.

He's prepared his pig jowl to be deep-fried and now he's coating his cod cheeks

in a mix of breadcrumbs, cod roe and dried chives.

He's hoping that Jason will appreciate his cheap cuts.

It's comfort food. It's fun. That's what's nice about it.

It's cod heads. It's not the first thing that pops into your head to order.

Keeping it at a relatively low cost and not taking the mickey out of guys that can't afford to eat top end.

I commend you for doing that, but it's still a cookery competition.

-What's the pitfall for you on this dish?

-It's a fish dish.

The pork mustn't end up being the main ingredient. I've got to make sure that ratio is met.

-It's quite easy to get a bit carried away when you're doing that sort of...

-Surf and turf?

-Yeah.

Charlie's dish, there seems to be a good hunk of pork on there.

Pork and cod is a great combination, but I don't know if it belongs on a fish dish.

Colin moves on to his sea rocks.

Determined to keep his lead, he's feeling the scrutiny of Asian food expert Jason.

Using Japanese nori seaweed, he's coating potato starch sheets before deep-frying them

to form the cracker base.

-They look pretty.

-They should just give the visual effect of sea rock. It's got a lot of flavour on it.

I'll dress it with oyster emulsion, some cockles and herbs, so it's going to be a lovely, delicate eat.

I'll let them cool down, then I'll dress them with my emulsions.

Some way of me introducing a different texture, but via a different vehicle to do so.

I'm really excited about this dish. If he gets it right, I think this is a banquet-winning dish.

It's close to plating-up time.

For his seafood extravaganza, Colin steamed his cockles

and having filled his mussels with salmon tartare,

he's individually piping each one with herb and oyster emulsion.

Stephanie is bringing together her grapefruit and chicory salad.

But Charlie is taking things at a more leisurely pace.

Any cooking of his fish cuts is being left right until the last minute.

# Dance for your daddy, dance for your mammy, till the boat comes in... #

Stephanie is first to plate up. She starts with a grapefruit and chicory salad,

then on goes her crab meat and wasabi peas.

The crab custard pie is displayed on a porcelain hand and topped with hot lemon mayonnaise,

which she finally blow-torches for a golden finish.

-Want a hand? Are you OK?

-Give us a hand(!)

-It's a fairly obvious pie in the face, isn't it?

-Yeah.

-Do you believe that this dish has what we're looking for?

-I think it is.

-Shall we go taste it?

-Please.

-How do we eat this dish?

-I think it's a bit of fun with your neighbour, sort of pie in the face.

But the ideal way is just to pop that down and eat it like that.

It's very delicate. The pastry is almost too thin.

-If it hung around too long, it would be soft. But I think she's done well with refinement, finesse...

-Hmm.

The fennel is a nice flavour and I like the fact that there's fennel on the top.

When you taste the pastry with the crab and the lemon, at the very end, you get the pollen.

And knowing what fennel pollen's like, it wasn't a flavour I picked up.

And the wasabi peas, you don't think they're too hot?

-So these are the peas.

-Does the wasabi come out?

Have you incorporated that in the dish enough to be able to know that it's there?

-There is no flavour...

-I think she's played it too safe with the wasabi in that.

I wanted the whole thing to taste like crab. That was absolutely paramount.

It was a great crab tart with a lovely citrus salad. The other flavours, the fennel pollen, wasabi,

-they got lost a little bit.

-Yeah.

I hope that's a good score because to keep the momentum up would be superb.

Next to plate up is Charlie and it's a last-minute dash.

Having been wary of overcooking his cod tongue and cheeks, he's only just got them on the heat.

This is how I like it, last blooming minute! Bring it on!

You said you work better under pressure. Are you working better?

I love it. It's what it's about. Let's raise the heartbeat!

On to the plate go the crispy coated cod cheeks on a bed of wilted spinach,

then cod tongues go on top of a potato rosti, followed by crispy pig jowl.

He finishes off by drizzling over a cider reduction with sticky onions.

-This is for Comic Relief. The humour factor is just in the title.

-Just in the title.

-Will this dish make me smile when I eat it?

-Hopefully. Let's go and try.

With cod tongue, if you're not careful, if you overcook it,

I hate to use the word, but it can be quite disgusting.

-This is the tongue?

-Yeah. Pan-frying cod's tongue, it can be quite tough

-and you've got to really work with it.

-That's nice.

-Yeah, it's a nice texture.

-Is that pork not too crunchy?

-Maybe on the rind.

That skin's quite hard, isn't it?

I'd have maybe taken it off because it's tastier.

The flavour of the cod cheek in the... Are they panko breadcrumbs?

-A mixture of panko, dried chives and dried cod roe.

-Yeah.

-The cod cheeks are lovely in a nice breadcrumb. If you were blindfolded, you'd know what you've eaten.

-Yeah.

-Will this get you enough points to get you back in the game?

-That ball's in your park.

-Back in the game is Charlie. This is a good dish.

-That's a good one.

-Yeah.

I'm not really certain how that one went. I loved eating it. It was really nice. I enjoyed it.

I felt I needed more sauce on the plate and he had a fair point, the jowl was crisp.

Last to plate up is Colin. He's still decorating his time-consuming sea rocks with oyster emulsion

and his handiwork isn't going unnoticed.

You've got a bit of work going on, a lot of last-minute rushing around.

-How is this going to work for a lot of covers?

-It will be a tricky dish, but you can do it in advance.

Being at the banquet last time, I've designed the dish, making sure that I will have time to do this.

Colin starts the intricate detailing of his plate with dots of herb and oyster emulsion.

Looking at Colin, he looks really focused. He wasn't happy with his score, joint first.

That, to me, is amazing to be joint first, but Colin wanted more.

You can almost smell the concentration. He's really going for it!

Next, Colin places a mussel atop a hessian sack,

followed by a dashi jelly starfish and a quenelle of salmon tartare.

He pan-fries his salmon, then places it in the centre of the plate.

Last on, his hand-crafted centrepiece, a sea rock decorated with oyster emulsion and trout roe.

The dish is completed using mussel stock and dry ice to create a spectacular seaweed mist.

-I'm very happy with it.

-Do you feel that you've hit the brief?

-It's visually exciting.

-It's going to be a talking point in the dining room.

-Can you do this for a large number of people?

Doing this for the banquet won't be a problem. Cooking the fish is last-minute.

The rest is just preparation, so it won't be an issue for large numbers.

-It looks pretty as a picture, but it's got to taste good. Shall we go taste it?

-Yes, please.

-Do you think there's a lot of fish on the plate?

-It's a 120-gram fish, but there's not much else with it.

It's fish, fish, fish and more fish.

-There ain't no meat on it.

-There's pork on his cracker.

-I'll give you that.

It should be very light and delicate and have that kind of fishiness,

shrimpy, kind of oystery...

Are you happy with the taste and the texture of that? Do you think it will hold up for a banquet?

I'd normally cook it, then put it in the dehydrator to dry more.

Once you've got the ingredients on it, it will go soft.

This is a curious thing. It's meant to be crisp and it's already gone moist. The initial crunch...

It's a little bit chewy.

-Are you happy with the...?

-Yeah, it's cooked all the way through in a bath at 50 degrees, so...

It's very, very soft, but it's cooked through.

-Mi-cuit of salmon, isn't it?

-Yeah.

That is spot-on.

It's a beautiful dish with the dry ice effect. Is that something you might have to change a bit?

I've been toying with doing it at the table or even pouring the sea water through the holes here

or just maybe some more water in there, so it's easily fixed.

-Is that style over substance?

-I loved the way it looked.

-Yeah.

It's fantastic. But is it really bringing much of a flavour?

-I wish Jason would give more away. He just kind of...

-There's nothing there.

-"No." "Yeah."

-I think this could be a very strong round.

-All three dishes were a step up from the starters.

As long as you're personally happy with what you're cooking, that's all you can go on, isn't it?

I think my fish was better than my starter, so I would be expecting an eight.

I would hope on this dish I've got a better score than with my starter.

I'd be pretty disappointed if it's below a seven.

I think this time it's anybody's game because all three dishes, I felt, were really strong.

Steph, I liked your crab custard pie.

I liked how you got the humour into the dish.

I loved the idea of the wasabi peas.

I was worried about the wasabi peas being a little bit too hot.

But they weren't too hot. If anything, I would like to have seen a little bit more heat.

Overall, it was a nice dish.

The dishes that get through to the banquet on this competition are the best of the best

and I felt that dish just didn't have enough wow factor on the palate for me.

Charlie, I liked the concept of tongue in cheek.

I liked the whole idea of making a bit of fun out of the title.

I liked the temperature of the cod cheek inside the batter,

but I didn't like the batter. I think it was too dry.

It almost tasted like falafel mix.

All in all, it was a good to great bit of cookery,

but it just needs a bit more to take it to that level of greatness.

Colin, for your cockles, mussels with salmon, it was a visual spectacle to look at.

But when you poured in the sea water,

by the time we got it to the judges' chambers, it lost that, right?

That dish, I would have paid a lot of money to eat in any restaurant I've ever sat in.

I thought it was sensational. When I put that nori cracker in my mouth, it just danced on my tongue.

-It was streets ahead of everything I've seen in the last couple of days.

-Thank you.

-Steph...

For your dish, I'm giving you...

..a six.

Charlie...

for your dish, I'm going to give you a score of...

..seven.

Colin...

..for your dish...

..I'm going to give you...

..a nine.

If you had just nailed the sea water, that was a ten out of ten. It was as simple as that.

I want to see somebody from the North East go to the banquet with the main course. See you tomorrow.

-Well done, big man.

-Well done.

-It was a cracking dish. I was surprised not to hear a ten.

Halfway through and Colin's in the lead with an overall score of 16.

Stephanie's fallen backwards with 13

and Charlie is snapping at her heels with 12.

I wanted to get a high score and get ahead of the other two guys which I've done, so I couldn't be happier.

Yesterday was Charlie's rough day. Today is mine.

I'm one point behind Steph. I'm still confident to get through to the judges' chamber on Friday.

Colin is moving on ahead and that's a worry.

Tomorrow, it's the main course and the showcase continues.

Woo-hoo, that's warm!

-But tensions run high.

-BLEEP... BLEEP

-And the laughs run dry.

-I wouldn't have the nerve, would you?

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd