London and South East Fish Great British Menu

Britain's most talented chefs are bringing out their funny sides

on this year's great British menu.

IMITATES DONALD DUCK

This week, three of London and the South East's finest chefs -

risk taker Matt Gillan...

If this doesn't set, it's game over.

-..technical Adam Simmonds...

-I've never been so nervous.

..and returning contender Tom Aikens...

-You've worked hard at this.

-I have.

..are fighting for the chance to serve witty,

playful dishes at a special banquet celebrating 25 years

of Red Nose Day.

For yesterday's starter course, Matt took us back to the '70s.

-Very good.

-Adam managed to outwit him.

-Pigeon with its own lunch and dinner.

-Yeah.

But the highest score went to returning contender Tom.

-A real master class, I have to say.

-Thank you.

Today, it's the fish course, and the pressure's on Tom and Matt, who

are both attempting to raise a smile with scallops as their punch line.

-Matt, what are you doing with your scallops?

-I'm cooking mine, Tom.

I understand you're not cooking yours.

But has our youngest contestant, Matt,

bitten off more than he can chew?

Is it burning? It doesn't smell so good, does it?

This year's challenge is to raise money,

raise a smile and support Comic Relief.

The chefs must create gastronomic masterpieces

-that are also witty and fun.

-Wow!

They've been inspired by projects throughout the UK

that use the charity's money to change lives...

We teach them respect, we teach them to be fit, well-being.

..and done their bit to raise some much-needed cash.

Judging the chef's fish courses today is a fearsome former

champion and seafood expert.

It is Richard Corrigan.

I'm looking for a nice piece of fish.

Beautifully cooked, beautifully seasoned.

And something to fulfil the brief - a sense of humour!

The pressure is on Matt, in last place.

Going into the fish course in third position, not ideal.

-No, but you're still...

-It's pretty tough. It's pretty close.

-Up for it then?

-Raring to go. Can't wait to get into that kitchen today.

First up is Tom Aikens, a returning contender.

This is a man on a mission to put a smile on our faces,

who scored nine for his starter yesterday.

I am really looking forward to today.

I've got another few surprises up my sleeve.

And hopefully I can keep ahead with the score.

You did well on the last dish yesterday.

I was very happy with the first course.

It's always great to be one or two points ahead of the others.

What are you cooking today?

Basically, I am doing a marinated scallop dish,

so they're not cooked at all.

And with that, I'm doing a burnt apple puree flavoured with

lemon grass, vanilla and jasmine.

We've got some pickled cucumber. And then with a little bit of tapioca.

No cooking whatsoever?

There isn't as much cooking, there is marinating in the scallops.

I'm cooking the tapioca, I'm pickling the cucumber.

Is there anything you're worried about?

The only difficult part is

tapioca is always a difficult creature to get right.

It you overcook it, it's terrible.

This is going to make people smile. It is going to make people laugh.

And when they obviously see on the menu hand-dived scallop,

when they get the dish, the old light bulb will hopefully go on

and they'll go, "Ah, I get it."

Tom is determined to hold on to his first place with marinated

scallops, burnt apple, vanilla and jasmine.

I like my fish, but overall I like it cooked!

Raw scallops and flavoured jellies - jasmine, vanilla

and burnt apple -

he has got to balance that out very carefully for that to work.

In second place, is Adam Simmonds,

a highly technical chef new to the competition.

His starter scored eight points yesterday,

despite the fact he left a bone in it.

With the fish course, I really want to come out on top.

I think it's a very strong dash and there's no chances of any bone.

-Adam.

-Morning.

-You must feel gutted about that bone in the pigeon breast.

-For sure.

-And it probably cost me yesterday.

-What are you cooking?

Roasted Scottish langoustine, lovely oysters,

cucumbers and then a feta cheese,

-but done in a spherification.

-Feta and oyster?

Something in my head tells me, "Yeah, that sounds good."

And then oyster bubbles, xanthan, so it's just a natural...

-Can you just say that again?

-This is xanthan.

-Yes. Never used it.

-It just helps hold its bubble.

-You like your bubbles.

-I like my bubbles, yeah.

Have you fulfilled the brief?

The humour is about what's on the plate and what you're eating.

-You're not just going to blow bubbles here, are you?

-No, not only bubbles.

Adam is cooking langoustine and oysters to stay in contention,

with technical oyster bubbles and feta balls.

Adam's fish course is quite molecular.

His feta spherification, it's very technical.

Can he pull it off?

In third place, with seven points, is a risk taker Matt Gillan,

an ambitious young chef who had a poor start yesterday

and is determined to get back in the race.

Positioned third, quite a nervous position to be in.

The boys are ready to fight and I'm ready to fight back.

-Chef.

-Matt. How are you feeling?

Honestly, I'd prefer to be second or first,

but two points separates all three of us.

-Catch that up.

-Tell me about your dish.

The fish course is dive-caught scallops with pickled cucumber.

I'm going to do and elderberry sponge.

Last year, a chef done a sponge in a microwave oven.

-He messed it up last year.

-There will be no mistakes with this one.

I'm going to do an elderflower custard.

It's a very different dish, you know,

serving custard and sponge with scallops.

It will bring a smile to people's faces through different

flavour combinations, also its presentation, as well.

-Tommy can do scallops.

-Yep.

-Tommy can do cucumber.

-Yep.

We all consulted before today.

Chefs, it's the fish course, it's one of my favourite courses.

So, I wish you the very best. Great cooking.

And for some, why bother? No cooking.

Matt needs a top score for his fish course today

and is taking a gamble serving seared scallops with

elderflower custard and elderberry cake.

Slightly unsure about the whole dish.

He is in third place, he thinks there isn't a lot in it, but he needs

to really deliver a strong dish this time to be in the running.

So, Matt, what are you doing with your scallops there?

Uh, I'm cooking mine, Tom.

I understand you're not cooking yours.

Well, there are elements of mine that is cooked,

but the scallops are marinated.

Do you think that's a little bit risky, not cooking the scallop?

Do you think there's an expectation of a nice pan-fried scallop?

Well, put it this way, how would you like to pan fry 80 portions

of scallops as opposed to them being marinated and in the fridge,

already sliced?

If it meant I was at the banquet, it doesn't matter.

Well, I wouldn't want to cook...

Adam, would you like to cook 80 portions of scallop?

80 portions of scallops, it could be a nightmare.

I have stuck to pan frying for my scallops.

I think it's a much better flavour, but it is always quite nerve-racking

when you've got the same ingredient as one of the other chefs.

Determined returning contender Tom is marinating his hand-dived

scallops in jasmine, burnt apple and lemon juice.

-So, Tom.

-Hi, Richard.

-Where are you?

-I've marinated the scallops.

-Spanking fresh?

-Spanking fresh.

Just how I feel. Pardon the pun.

You decided not to cook the scallop just because...?

Well, look, there is no way that you could send out 80 portions

of scallops perfectly cooked in a space of ten minutes.

No chance.

-Tom, I'm going to leave you to it.

-Thank you.

There's a lot of pressure in the kitchen.

I don't think it's ever going to ease off.

This course is a little bit easier than the first course,

but it is still going to be a wonderful dish

and I think it is going to be a clear winner.

Risk taker Matt has moved on to the comedy element of his scallop

and elderberry dish - a savoury custard made in a very unusual way.

-So, you're making your savoury custard in a liquidizer?

-Yep.

I cook it in here. It's just a consistent temperature in here.

I'll bring it up to 85 degrees. It just sets the egg proteins

and once we pour it into the moulds, we quickly blast chill it.

Hopefully it sets in time.

If this doesn't set, it's game over on this.

That's terribly risky for competition, isn't it?

It's risky not taking risks.

Matt's elderflower custard, it could set, it might not set.

It could go horribly wrong.

Technical Adam is tackling the most complicated

element of his langoustine and oyster fish course,

something he hopes will bring a burst of humour to his dish.

This is your feta...? Feta balls.

So you've got feta cheese, goats cheese, lemon juice.

No salt cos of the feta itself.

-Salty milk.

-Which goes, I think, really well with the oyster.

Are these feta balls going to put a smile on people's faces?

I think they will because it is something that is slightly

different, playful.

Were you surprised Tom Aikens didn't do something similar?

No, because he is doing something similar as Matt,

so he can't cope with both of us, can he?

Adam's dish, whether or not it fits the brief, I'm not sure where,

you know, if there is enough humour in the dish.

As well as aiming to create witty, playful dishes this year,

the chefs have gone out of their way to demonstrate how the money

we raise every year through fundraising

changes lives here in the UK.

-I went to see The Choir With No Name.

-Why do they have no name?

Because they had a meeting and they couldn't figure out a name.

It was really inspiring to see.

That, obviously, inspired me to try and get a dish to the final banquet.

Unfortunately, that means one of you two is going home.

The Choir With No Name is a choir in London's Kings Cross

for people who have experienced homelessness.

It is one of over 15,000 Comic Relief funded projects

across the country, which uses our money to change lives.

# I'm still standing after all this time. #

It was started by Marie Benton, who drew on personal experiences

to help people less fortunate than herself.

When I first moved to London, I joined a choir

and it was one of the things that kept me grounded, really.

I made some really good friends and I had a kind of,

a sort of really regular social thing to do.

For me, it had been an enormous help,

so I thought that was going to be good for our members, as well.

Try and help people move on with life.

# I'm still standing. #

And that is really happening, which is fantastic.

Well done!

I've been homeless off and on for most of my life.

I sort of moved around a bit, tried to go back home,

but didn't really think or feel like I belonged anywhere.

I've been singing with the choir for 3 1/2 years now and, you know,

I love the people here.

It's sort of like a little family, if you like.

-I do feel like I've turned a corner in my life.

-That's brilliant.

At the end of each session, they all sit down for a hot meal,

something choir member Gemskii knows how to appreciate,

having spent most of her life on the streets.

I think it is really important to eat together.

This is definitely the most social thing I do all week.

And I know there are a lot of people in the choir who, this is

the only communal moment, and it is for me, as well,

-most of the time.

-So, how was the dinner?

It was lovely. The best meal I've had all week.

It feels like a proper family, just sitting down for a meal, you know?

For me, it has been quite touching - people have come through the door,

they're all very welcome no matter what.

It has a big impact on people's lives.

Inspired by his visit to the choir, Adam decided to put on a special

lunch and asked his customers to get involved with Comic Relief.

And who better to entertain his guests then Gemskii

and Dave from the choir?

It is not just Adam's paying guests that are in for a treat.

Eager to get some feedback on his competition menu, Adam has

prepared the oyster part of his fish course for Dave and Gemskii to try.

-Have you ever eaten oysters before?

-Yes.

-Lovely.

-I've never had oysters before.

-You haven't, OK.

-All in one?

-All in one.

-All right then.

That is something else! So good, so good.

That is really nice.

Am I going to start feeling slightly amorous in a minute?

That's...uh...

Oh, sweetie, it was great, or do I need more?

You probably need a few more.

Adam's not only cooking for charity, but singing

for charity, too, something he hasn't done since school.

In here, I'm in my comfort zone.

Out there, I won't be in my comfort zone.

But it's for charity,

so, you know, I'm going to do it in the spirit of charity.

Thank you.

After a good feed and raising nearly £800,

it's time for Adam to show just how dedicated to the cause he really is.

# I'm still standing after all this time

# I'm picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind. #

I enjoyed it.

Whether I made an idiot of myself or not, I did totally enjoy it.

So, it was good.

# I'm still standing! #

If you've been inspired to do your bit for Comic Relief and you

enjoy eating out, an easy way to get involved is through Menu Relief.

Find out more at...

..and learn about other ways

to help raise money, too.

-I heard you did a bit of singing.

-Yeah, really badly.

In the spirit of what it is, it was brilliant.

But I've never been so nervous.

Youngest competitor Matt is the one under pressure today,

trailing behind in third place.

And the sponge mix for his scallop and elderberry dish

isn't going to plan.

What happened?

I just went to test the sponge and it wouldn't come out of the gun,

so, um, I had to release the pressure

and the only way I knew was releasing it

and it has just gone everywhere.

-OK, you got rid of it. You started again?

-I started again.

Hopefully, it's the last one today.

-It is the last thing you need, really, to go wrong.

-Yeah.

I mean, to stay in this competition, you need to do well.

Yeah, definitely. Definitely.

Matt has really messed up his sponge.

It's in the sink, it's in the bin, he's started all over again.

He is blaming the airgun, but at this stage of the competition,

he just cannot afford to be making mistakes.

Something returning contender Tom knows only too well,

having competed in the Great British Menu kitchen once before.

Doing things, you know, twice, you know, is not a good feeling.

Particularly when you're under this amount of pressure.

Tom is working on an unusual burnt apple oil to go

with his marinated scallops.

-Burnt apple, Tom.

-Yes, Richard, burnt.

-What's in here?

Basically, I made an infusion of oil with the lemongrass,

the vanilla and jasmine.

And then caramelized apples in the oven.

This is slightly bitter. They have been completely burnt.

-That's quite different.

-Yeah.

Tom's burnt apple element of his scallop dish is risky.

If it's too bitter or he puts too much on the plate,

then it's just going to overpower it.

Adam has got a risky element of his own -

the technical feta balls for his langoustine and oyster dish.

-You are not really into spheres in this and that?

-Spheres? No.

I'd say they're little bit... they're old-school.

-Old school already?

-I'd say so, yeah.

-So, Adam.

-Yes.

This is dinosaur cooking, yeah?

-He said it's completely out of date already.

-Absolutely, man.

He says he was doing this ten years ago.

-Were you?

-Absolutely.

While you guys were still running around in your nappies.

-So, basically, that's going to form a skin around that.

-Yeah.

-So you have feta that is frozen.

-Yeah.

You sandwich the two together and just drop it in.

And then what happens is it creates a sealant around it.

Walking by, the smell of the oyster, that was great.

Yes. You will have lightly poached oyster and then the bubbles.

-And then the bubbles.

-Yeah.

Oh, we love some bubbles.

Across the kitchen, Matt has had to make the sponge

mix for his scallop and elderberry dish again from scratch,

and with plating up approaching,

can't afford to make any mistakes.

He's about to do the trickiest bit -

cooking the sponge mix in the microwave.

How long?

30 seconds. I'm just going to do a tester on one.

Dangerous, if it is not cooked enough,

then it is not going to be cooked, it is going to be raw.

If it is cooked too much, the proteins in the egg white

are going to toughen up and it is not very nice mouth feel.

So, as much as it seems quite easy, it's quite technical.

I'm presuming that he's using a microwave that he has never

used before. If it was me, I will be flapping inside.

I do microwave sponges at work.

It is quite a difficult thing to pull off,

particularly under this amount of pressure.

Oh, that doesn't smell so good, does it? Coming from there. Is it burning?

-It's not the cake.

-Huh?

-I think it's the microwave.

OK.

'The microwave sponge is a little bit risky,'

but they've come out nice, so I'm confident that they'll be

good, they'll carry my dish through.

Matt's got a bit more time to perfect his sponge as Adam is

first to plate up.

He quickly pan fries his langoustine tails before adding them

to the plate alongside his poached oysters.

-So...

-Then it is time for the moment of truth.

Will his technical feta balls hold?

-Happy?

-Yeah, happy.

-A lot of salty elements here.

-Yeah, but hopefully, it's balanced.

He continues with a sprinkling of seashore herbs,

tops the dish with chefy oyster bubbles

and pours cucumber essence into a jug on the side.

I'm sweating.

The star of your performance?

-Possibly.

-Let's go find out.

-OK.

Chef.

So, this is just a lightly chilled cucumber essence.

That is very nice.

I can taste the cucumber, I can taste the horseradish,

I can taste the green peppers.

Beautiful.

-Where is the humour?

-I think the dish is witty rather than humour.

It is from the sea - oysters, langoustine,

herbs from the shore of the sea.

I know he is marrying all the flavours,

they are all sort of seashore flavours,

but, where is, you know, the fun, the smile, the wit?

I don't see where the humour is in this dish.

Have the feta balls turned out the way you intended them to?

Yeah, they're probably slightly hard.

They were in their alginate bath slightly too long.

-Do you think it works?

-You don't, do you?

There is feta and goat's milk, it goes well with the other flavours.

It is beautiful, yeah.

And the oyster bubbles?

The oyster bubbles were another way of getting the lightness

of the oysters into the dish rather than the pure eating an oyster.

To be honest, I'm not a huge fan of oysters,

-but that's tasty, actually.

-Very creamy.

-Really creamy.

-Very nice. But where is the witty part of it?

That was better than yesterday.

Obviously, there were a few mistakes yesterday.

Today, that was ten times better.

I was very happy with the dish.

Next up is returning contender Tom and his hand-dived scallops dish.

And he's got a secret weapon in store -

a witty ocean floor plate, complete with comedy hand diver.

So, this is the guy that caught your scallops

-fresh this morning, yeah?

-Yeah. His name's George.

First on are pickled tapioca pearls.

Then he adds apple puree wrapped in apple jelly.

His marinated scallops, blanched cucumber discs

and pickled cucumber balls.

Before topping the dish off with burnt apple oil.

Finally, he pours apple consomme into jugs on the side.

I used to love Mobil guys, as a child.

-You've worked hard at this.

-I have.

-Is the proof in the eating?

-Of course, always is.

-Let's go taste, Tom.

-Okey-doke.

-The hand-dived scallop...

-It's fun, it definitely fits the brief.

Will your fellow chefs think this is a little bit gimmicky?

Not at all.

I think it is a little too gimmicky

and it detracts from what this should be.

Is that tapioca cooked properly?

Yes, it is.

-The tapioca feels a bit grainy for me.

-It's just slightly underdone.

Yeah, slightly underdone.

Do you think the vanilla works in the dish?

I think the vanilla does work. Burnt apple puree,

it goes well with the sweet and taste of the scallops.

-The burnt apple puree...

-It's lovely.

For me, my dish is more vibrant, there's more depth of flavour.

When you eat this, you're left with acidity in your mouth,

and that's all you're left with.

-Has it turned out the way you wanted?

-It has.

It is different, but an interesting dish.

-Are you intimidated by what you have seen from Tom?

-Yeah.

I think Rich has got a hard task,

but I would like to think mine is a better dish.

So, very happy with the dish. Put it up, smiles straight away.

So, I am very, very happy with that.

Last to plate up his young risk taker Matt who needs to claw back

vital points today.

He sears his scallops

and starts his plate with savoury elderflower custard.

Then adds pickled cucumber, his microwaved elderberry sponge

and a sprinkling of dried miso.

And seaweed crisps.

Last on, his centrepiece, a seared scallop

and his surprise secret weapon.

Snow globes. Underwater snow globes.

Captain Nemo had something like this, didn't he? Underwater cities?

Are you happy?

-Yeah.

-Has that sponge worked out?

-Let's go taste it.

Come on.

-You fulfil the brief?

-Yeah, I think so.

When that is put down in front of you,

it creates a bit of interest, some intrigue.

I think my biggest worry is people picking it up and shaking it.

I do like the idea of, like, an underwater snow dome.

-We all played with those as kids.

-Yeah, yeah.

But I mean, if you had greasy hands,

I think it would be quite difficult, maybe, to pick up.

-This sponge has fulfilled what it is supposed to do?

-Yeah.

I like the flavour with it. I like the texture.

I'm not sure where the sponge actually

-fits into the concept of the dish.

-No.

It didn't need to be there or it didn't add anything at all to

the dish, apart from being there.

-Slightly too chewy.

-Yeah.

-Happy with the cucumber?

-Yeah. Very happy.

Try that cucumber, I think the vinegar is quite raw.

-It is very strong.

-That is very strong.

-Do think that scallop is the right size for the dish?

-Yeah, I think so.

I think it would sit nicely on a four-course menu.

-Very small.

-Yes, I think one scallop is a bit on the small side.

-Yeah.

-Is there anything you would change?

-No.

I was a bit lost, really.

I think this is a joke that might have gone a bit pear shaped.

I agree with you.

So, fish course in the hands of Richard.

Again, no idea what he's thinking at all.

-Ecstatic, happy?

-Pretty nervous to be honest.

Both your dishes have been brilliant today,

so a little bit anxious at the moment.

There is nothing in it really. It's very close.

It is very close and, you know,

the amount of pressure that is in that kitchen,

for all of us to perform, you know, every course is tough.

I'm on edge, to be honest, cos I need a good score today.

Adam.

Your langoustine, oyster and cucumber essence with feta.

I loved your whole dish.

It was incredibly refreshing.

I had been worried about the feta balls.

But you surprised me. It worked with the whole dish.

It certainly worked with the lightly cooked oyster.

But...

And it is a big but...

I couldn't find the humour.

I think that was missing.

Tom.

Your hand-dived scallops was an exceptional dish.

It hit the brief very well.

I personally loved the marinated scallops.

Thank you.

Normally, I detest flavoured oils and jellies,

but in your hands, you made them work really well.

-But... There's always a but.

-There's always a but.

I think there was too much of that burnt apple.

-OK.

-That tapioca,

I thought that was still a little sandy.

OK.

Matt, your scallop, elderflower and cucumber miso.

That snow globe was a really nice touch.

It had wit and humour and I think it hit the brief pretty well.

And it was cooked really well.

But...

I just didn't really get it, personally.

The savoury custard,

the sponge and the scallop. I felt it was very rich.

Adam. Your langoustine dish...

..I'm giving...

..eight out of ten.

Thank you.

Tom. Your hand-dived scallops, I'm giving...

..eight out of ten.

Matt, your scallop and elderflower,

I'm giving...

..seven out of ten.

I love your food, the three of yours. Well done.

ALL: Thank you.

Well done.

Well done, boys.

So, halfway through

and Tom is still in the lead with an overall score of 17.

Adam is hanging in there with 16

and Matt is trailing behind with 14.

Great score, great comments, I couldn't ask for more.

Slipping away, slipping away from the guys,

so I know I have got a bit of a hill to climb.

We've still got two more courses to go,

so it's still all to play for.

Tomorrow, it's the main course, and Matt's got his work cut out.

I have got a few points to catch up on. It's do or die today.

But will he make a huge schoolboy error?

It has got to be hot food, yeah?

It's no good looking pretty if it's not hot.

-Have you felt your plates?

-Yeah.

You put it on a cold plate?

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