23/10/2011 Something for the Weekend


Similar Content

Browse content similar to 23/10/2011. Check below for episodes and series from the same categories and more!



Good morning. It's tone.00am. It's Sunday, the 23rd of October. We're


joined in the studio today by the man with the dandelion man who has


put rock 'n' roll into stand-up comedy.


And the wonderful Raith Small. Stay with us to have some Sunday


food, drink some Sunday cocktails. Yeah, welcome to Something For the


Weekend. Louise is off this week because she's ill. Get well soon.


Get well. Angellica Bell has stepped in. She's pregnant. I am.


It's not a pillow. How on earth did that happen? I am asking myself


that same question. Just remember, pregnancy is not an illness. Have


you felt good? There were three weeks where I thought, my gosh,


what is happening here? But most of the time I am upbeat. How long


until you give birth? Eight weeks. Could come today? Could. You have


your scrubs? Hot water, towels, a cup of tea. Nice. You have been to


the Good Food Show. It was fab. I was at the BBC Good Food Show in


Scotland. I was in a kilt. Here it is - no, that's not me in the kilt.


There it is. What was underneath? Do you know, I did bottle it. I did


actually wear underwear. I wasn't a true Scotsman. Jude made me a kilt.


It's great. It's very liberating. Have you ever worn won? No, I


haven't. Would you? Yeah, but I feel I shouldn't because isn't it


all heaped in history? I felt because my wife is Scottish, by


default I could do it. Your wife is Scottish? Yeah. How is that going


on? It's all right, you know? together. It was the Masterchef


final this week. Boo. You're booing because I am not in it, and Phil


won it. This is the moment he won it. Let's have a look.


Phil. I was robbed. It wasn't right. How


did he win? He already does a cooking slot on This Morning. He is


a chef, isn't he? It's cheating, absolutely. He stole the show


recently playing Emma's boyfriend in One Day, but he'll be telling us


about a new film, Anonymous, and what it's like taking direction


from Ridley Scott. This film, I went to see it the other day. It's


really good. I am going to see it. Don't give anything away. I have to.


Not too much. Not too much. It's all about a conspiracy theory how


Shakespeare didn't write his play. I'll explain more about that later


on. I have just finished reading a Shakespeare. Which one? William.


Plus, bill Baillie, described as a master of comedy, is here to give


us an insight into his extremely musical, extremely funny brain.


Don't forget to tell us your name when you e-mail via the web site. I


can't believe he gave me the live access - used to have to dig for


that for awhile. I am pregnant. Give me a break. Do you need a wee?


No. I went before I came on! E-mail us or Tweet us if you have


questions for Bill and Raith. What is cooking today? We have coal


and... Chalk, tar! Exactly. All the things you're craving. This is


lovely. This is a Middle Eastern dish, so king prawns. We have some


nigella seeds and tahini. The main course is sherry-braised chicken,


dead simple, on a winterish day. Always going on about - what is


going on with the weather? It's boiling - not boiling but... It's


pleasant is how I would describe it. I really want winter to kick in.


do. I am bored of the Indian summer. I love winter clothes. When I think


of winter, I think of labour. due on Christmas? 19th of December.


Everybody is going, "It's going to come Christmas Day." Yeah! Everyone


is going, oh! Think of the publicity! There is actually no


news at Christmas. A quiet time. You could be news. You could be the


news. Last year you got married, and it was all about show in New


York. All of those pictures of you and Michael in the snow in the


streets of New York. Were you jealous? Did it touch your heart?


Made me feel jealous. He's a good- looking boy. Today's dessert is


apple and passion fruit mer eng pie. What more could you want? Heaven.


Finally today, it's a sweet potato bhuna masala. You could add other


ingredients, but I want to show the main bulk of the curry is the


exciting bit of that. Lovely. Tasty. Thank you. You can follow all of


those recipes on the website. you can look forward to on the


show... British police have been murdered in a rich man's panic room.


Attenborough is back to explore the frozen planet. Millions of tonnes


of ice have lost the support of their rocky bed. And The


Impressions Show with Cull Shaw and Stephenson. Now, you've still got


another Dragon in here, so let me tell you where I am at.


Can't wait for all of that but we have to go over to Wayne. He's


going to tell us what cocktails I will not be tasting. I'll be under


the microscope from Mr Rimmer here because I am doing dessert-style


cocktails, pudding in a glass, lemon cheesecake and an apple


crumble. What? In a glass? Sounds sweet. Puddings in a glass. I am


not sure that's going to be my thing. I think that sounds nice.


Your thing, not mine. They come in after the pub, take some pudding,


vodka, puree it. They don't! course they do. They drink cider,


anyway, students. What are we going to make? Very tasty prawns. We have


some butter to cook them in, then the wet part of the sauce is lemon,


tahini, olive oil, mint and sumac, which is a great ingredient, a


spicy berry. You'll not be able to eat those, are you? They already


told me I can't. You can't eat shellfish, soft cheese, what else?


Pate. That's about it. What are you - are you doing any cravings at the


moment? None. I haven't had one craving at all. Supposedly your


cravings are the things your body requires? What the baby needs - I


love it you're so in touch with your feminine side. You have made


me go to the toilet. Do you need a wee? If you do, just go.


LAUGHTER What are you having, a boy or a


girl? I can't tell you that. Do you know? Yeah. Do you? Do you think


you can tell from the way I look? It's a boy, definitely a boy - 100%


- well, 50% - 50/50. Boy or a girl? Definitely a boy. Am I right? Am I


right? I'm not going to say! Let's get cooking. Did you find out?


my daughter, we did find out, then with Hamish, we did, I think


because we really liked the idea of having another girl. We thought, if


it was a boy, we didn't want to have that moment when you think,


it's a shame. So when we did, we were ready. I couldn't wait. I


wanted to find out. What's the point in waiting? I know. It's like,


the midwife knows and you don't - it's ridiculous. It's a control


thing there, Tim. We have toasted off the sesame seeds, the cumin


seeds, the nigella seeds, the hazel nuts, then we spoon all of this


into a mortar and pestel and grind it. You could put this into a spice


grinder, but there is something quite nice about this. Smells


lovely. Smells delicious. Just mash it down, so you're breaking down


all of those flavours. While that happens, we'll start to cook the


prawns off which is the bit you can't have, but to be honest, I


think this sauce is delicious on its own. I can taste that? We'll


have it with a little bit of flatbread. Some oil in there,


garlic in there. Slice the garlic so you use it as an ingredient,


then we chuck in our prawns and cook those away, so we have a


lovely, delicious buttery, prawny flavour going on in there.


DING Are you doing that... No, I am not


doing that on purpose. Keep banging! I am working. My dad


used to ask me to clean the house. I just used to go - I am going to


use a product name - I apologise - Mr Sheen, then think, they'll think


I cleaned now. Leaving pictures at an angle to show they have done it.


I might try that at home. Michael is a modern man. He has been really


good, doing the dinners, cooking. Does he know what sex your baby is?


He doesn't even know I am pregnant. Yeah, he does! He does. I sort of


convinced him at first, let's find out. He was like, mmm. Now he's


glad he knows. I don't think it matters either way. It's up to you


whatever you want to do. Yeah, but some people are dead against


finding out. They think it should be a surprise. Should be a surprise


on the day, but I'll tell you what, there is quite a lot going on when


you give birth. LAUGHTER


Squeeze the lemon oil in with the sumac, add the tahini. What sort of


birth are you going to have? haven't got a birth plan. I am just


going to go in and see what happens. Wing it? Wing it, yeah! Because I


think if you go in with too much preconceptions with what you want


and that, it doesn't go to plan, you can be disappointed. I wouldn't


mind trying natural. You should do - I think definitely. Yeah? And if


it's really bad, I might start screaming and yelping and saying,


"Give me something." But I am hoping I can - and one of the girls


here was talking about hip know- birthing, breathing and... That's


all good. Most of the world give birth naturally. It's only Western


societies - if you can. Obviously, if there is medical problems...


Exactly. Isn't your lifestyle different because if you have a


headache, you take pills and - not that you do. Is that enough? Yeah.


Chuck in all the lemon juice and give it a mix. That smells


delicious - you have all the nuts in there. That's beautiful.


chuck the vast majority of this in. We just coat the prawns with this,


so straight away, we start getting all of this lovely flavour. Why is


it pregnant women can't eat shellfish and soft cheese and


things? What happens to them? don't know. It's - with cheese -


mix it up - and the tahini. It's the lack of pasteurisation in soft


cheese, isn't it? What can you get? It's about bacterial - there are


things like salmonella. From the cheese, I am not sure. Probably


simply because if you get... I am thinking of things you can normally


get from shellfish as a nonpregnant person, like E-coli, salmonella -


what's the really scary one? It's a bit like the super-bug in


hospitals? No. It's called - Anyway! Anyone help? Norrow virus,


which is a really serious one. Right. A little bit of water comes


into that. Mix that around as well. Back into here - all the things


like the hazel nuts and the sesame seeds - they smell delicious.


Normally, we always have prawns in a creamy sauce and stuff like that.


Let's add a touch more. In here we have the lemon and the sumac. Come


Half of that into that pan and the rest over there. Enough? Lovely.


Then we combine all of this lovely tahini sauce with the nuts an the


reason we do it in two layers is that we wafpbt there to be this


nice toastiness from all of the nuts -- want there to be all of the


toastiness from all the nuts. Then, in here,... Is that the flat


bread? Flat bread. So we've got the prawns, delicious flat bread to go


with it. You can use any kind of flat bread. That's like Lebanese


flavour. Yes, all the things are Lebanese, like the sumac. We are


going to tear the bread like that and then to serve it, we have some


delicious, delicious prawns sitting on the plate. So you get it like a


sauce, quite thick and the nuts are thickening it all up. Then we serve


it with pickled chillis and a little squeeze of Lemon over the


top and Angellica, for you, some sauce. And bread. The hazelnuts and


prawns work really well. That's lovely. Really nice. What are we


going to have for the main course? Sherry-braised chicken. Luckily all


the alcohol gets cooked out so I can taste that. Yes. You can see


see that and the recipes at our website. This is just what I wanted


for breakfast this morning. Yes, prawns. Ben Miller steps into a new


drama in the role of detective Richard Poole now. Sun, sand and


serious crime. Oh, this is great. We have got a British policeman


murdered in a richman's panic room. An old book clutched in his hands.


A safe that's open and a vase that's smashed. As for suspects,


there are only two people without an alibi. James, because he was


town on his beach alone and Sarah because she was taking a shower.


Not that any of this matters. Doesn't get us any closer to


understanding how the murderer escaped. I need to see the pieces


from the vase and the book Charlie was holding, but first the body.


That won't be possible. What won't? Seeing the body? No, none of it,


the book, the boody, the vase, none of it is here. What are you saying?


It's in Guadeloupe. Fine. Which is a completely different island.


can head for the Caribbean and Death In Paradise on Tuesday at 9


on BBC One. The first guest starred in Black Books and led one of the


Never Mind the Buzzcocks teams for 11 series. He's most known for his


combining music with comedy and he has a sell out show coming up.


likes eating, that's his own qualification for judging people's


dinners, right. Worrying what Michael Winner thinks of your food,


it would be like going to the park and worrying that a duck has looked


at you in a funny way. Fabio Capello said it was unappetita


Anglaise which is like very damning. The badger and the sparrow, but I


like the rustic bling, I've got a Prada wheel barrow. That was from


his new tour, Dandelion Mind. Welcome back to something for the


weekend, Mr Bill Bailey. A new tour that's not new because you have


been doing it for a year? Yes, it's modified gently. It's been all


around the world and it's kind of, every show's an different thing, it


changes all the time. When you take a show, you said earlier, you have


taken it to Australia, where else? Started off in the Scottish


Highlands. Why did you start off there? I've always wanted to go


there. I've longed to go there. It's a beautiful part of Britain


and just trying to organise a trip to get up there was tricky so I


thought, if I book a load of gig there is, I have to go, you know,


you've committed to it. Also the fact is, there was a way of trying


out the show. So it wasn't like they were funnier up there and they


would like you better? No, the food was good as well. How far do they


have to travel? Isn't there 200,000 people up there in the size of


Belgium or something? Yes, it's tricky to get around, we were


hampered by the ash cloud when we were there, you usually fly from


Inverness to Orkney or Shetland, but we had to drive all the way up.


On a train track. We had to build a bridge! What is Dandelion Mind, the


concept behind it? The name comes from a dream I had in Melbourne


where I had a bit of a fever and/or too much blue cheese before I went


to bed. Basically, I had this vision at the back of my head that


disintegrated into dandelion spores, and I thought, that is interesting.


It sums up the idea of the thoughts spinning off in all directions, so


I adopted it for the show. It's one of my favourite images. So the show


is about nothing and just thoughts? That was the loose theme b, doubt


about it, you know, doubt about the world, western capital itch,


teetering on the brunk, doubt about what -- brink, doubt about where we


are going, it's a good way to start the show then you get spun off into


different challenges. There's a lot of music in it as well. You've


toured Australia, where else? Zealand, America and Canada and I


did three months in the West End. Years ago people used to tour


around Britain, didn't they, and say it's harder crowds up there.


Are they harder to play, some of the countries than others, or are


they all similar because the world's a closer place? It's got


closer, physically it's shrinking as well. Things are moving all the


time. I think that's a myth. People always say, humour is different in


America, I don't believe that, I think that's a myth. I think


comedy's become much more global partly because of things like the


intermet and YouTube, you noshes people can Google up your comedian


and wash clips -- you know. They're more comedy savvy now aren't they.


Sometimes people might think the culture is really funny and another


place they might think it's dead pan. Not to blow our trumpet, but


British comedy generally travels well around the world, probably


better than a lot of comedy. Some comedy of countries, certain


countries, can be quite country specific, but British comedy spends


to be universal, that's why it travels very well. Tell us about


this thing you are doing, called the Tenori-on? Yes, the Tenori-on


is a Japanese muzical and is visual instrument -- musical. It consists


of a pad of 140-odd buttons and each button, when you press it, it


luem naits and it shines in a pattern -- luminates. You can


create images and they're then played use ago musical tone.


think we should see it in action. It's extraordinary. We have a clip.


# Whilst vaguely watching you nibble your sandwich


# I was gripped by an overwhelming sense of utter futility


# You Twitter Oh my God I'm having a sandwich


# Like it's thrilling # Then later 4,000 Tweeters tweet


what filling... # That's not it. We had a girl come on here, an artist,


Ellie Goulding, she came on and played one I think. Yes, there are


a few. Little Boots as well. That was easy it, she came on, yes. --


that was it; yes. You can hook up to other instruments and play other


instruments, so it's very much of now because it's a midi, meaning it


talks a lot to other instruments. I also like the low tech element of


pressing buttons because so much of music is about programming and


digital sounds on a computer, whereas this is, physically making


an image and it get played. It's perfect for me, the combination of


comedy and visual. We have got a Tweet from Stephanie who says what


do you get more pleasure from, comedy or music, you are probably


going to say both but music drives you, doesn't it? Yes, when I was a


kid I thought I would be in a rock band. I thought I'd be in Talking


Heads, I thought that was my ambition, I didn't write to them


and asked if I could be in their band. Stupid really, I should have


done - duh! I sat at home with with the window open playing the piano


hoping that David Byrne would snap me up. I thought that was what I'd


do. I was in band at school, played music, learned music to a high


level, took lots of exams, the diploma, I thought that's what I


would end up doing and I ended up doing the School Review and plays


and I loved comedy. The spoken word took over as well as a love of


music. I think I probably love them the same now. Didn't you headline


neb worth? This summer. -- neb worth? I was on between Limp


Biscuit and another band, that was great fun. What is the biggest buzz,


getting the audience laugh or getting them to love your tunes?


Probably a bit of both. That's where it all happened, it all came


together because people were laughing about the comedy. Then I


did a couple of new songs in that show. I did a version of the folk


song Scarborough Fair. I had the whole place bouncing and it was


singing, you know, Scarborough Fair, you know, and it was great. For me


that,'s the ideal gig, you know, a bit of comedy and music. Is there


any instrument you can't or want to play? I'm not so good on the violin.


Is it because of your fingers are big? I just can't play it. They


don't move quick enough? I've never learned it. It's something I must


do. That's on my-to-do list. Stringed instruments, key boards,


I'm fine. OK, Bill is not allowed to leave


because he's going to cook a pudding with us. Keep treething


your questions for him or Raith Small -- tweeting. It's try and


remember what year it was time now or what we like to call it, Deja


View. # And I said


# What about Breakfast at Tiffany's # She said I think I remember the


film # As I call laughing


# We both kind of liked it # And I said


# Well that's the one thing we've got... # The world's first


processed food to be made from GM fruit has gone on sale here. It's


tomato paste from tomatoes which have an added gene to slow the


ripening process. It was far and away the most serious incident in


the Channel Tunnel's two years of operation. The fire broke out when


the train was approximately 12 miles from Calais. After an absence


of 700 years, the stone of destiny is returning to Scotland. The stone,


which was used for Scottish Coronations, has been kept at


# I say # What about breakfast at


What was the year that all happened? I can't join in because I


cheated. Last night I went to look up the name of that band because I


thought, what on earth is the name of that band? They were called Deep


Blue something, but when I looked it up, with the hit - in that year.


2003. I am getting worse at this. am embarrassed for you. I am


absolutely embarrassed for you. What year was that? Have a guess!


am rubbish! We have had so many photos. Most have been the Davina


McCall. -- cauliflower cottage pie. But first, naked pictures - Bruce


from Middleton made the cauliflower cottage pie - that's great. He has


a koi carp tattooed on his chest. Right over your heart - that's


going to hurt. It's not a bad tattoo, is it?


LAUGHTER Finally, when we started this and


you sent in the pictures we were hoping for some ladies, so Karren


from St Ann's - never lets us down, do you? She did the cauliflower


cottage pie. She made it for her boyfriend Carl. She's apologised


for the tan lines, Tim. Apologies accepted. Excellent. We're


delighted with that. Fully clothed we have Sarah, Amy, Cassie and


Hannah. They also made the cauliflower cottage pie. They're


wearing their tiger costumes as they can't afford heating. What are


they? Rompers? For grown-ups, yeah. Finally, Paul Evans, the dad, and


the son - again, cauliflower cottage pie. They're from Newcastle


under lime. Nice work. Cool. So if you're going to cook any of today's


dishes and want to show yourself - and your dish - on telly...


don't have to be naked. It helps! Send it to the website. Or you can


Tweet. Have your face or whatever you want to show us on the telly.


What goes through your mind when you think, I am going to get a koi


carp tattooed on his chest? He has none on his arm, does he? He just


has a fish on his chest - so bizarre. I bet he's got more than


one tattoo - don't you think? 4 -- Certainly on his thigh or something.


That starter was absolutely beautiful. Thank you! What are we


going to do? A simple dish - sherry-braised chicken. We have


chicken, onion, stock, sherry, olives, parsley, butter and some


bacon. This is a really lovely simple dish to do. The nice thing


about using something like sherry is it's quite sweet so you get that


flavour in there. If it was volume, it would be a loud flavour - aaah


It's shouting about its flavour. Reminds me of my nan's and


Grandad's - used to drink that. schooner of sherry. How much is


that? Like a double measure. They used to have little sherry glasses.


Give it a good dredge in the flour, then pat off the excess. So Phil


Vickery winning - did it make you agree... Just because he's a rugby


player! You didn't compete against him? No, no, I didn't see him. I


saw him in the semi-final. He was very good. He was taking it very


seriously. I think that's the great thing about those shows now is the


contestants take it very seriously and get stuck in, so good luck to


him. Well done! Well done - yeah! Phil, well done, mate. I was hoping


for the trophy here! Whatever! Let's cook. You were robbed! I was!


So flour, patting the excess off, the seasoned flour into some nice


hot fat to seal it. While we're doing that, slice the onion down


the middle, take off the stem on the bottom and slice it - however


you want to do it, really. This is classic casserole-style cooking,


really. That size or thicker? That's fine. So we're sealing off


the meat. Then we take the meat out of the pan, then add all the other


ingredients. So we have onion, smoked bacon, a great combination.


Do you have our Stone Roses tickets sorted yet? Because we're going to


be the support act, it shouldn't... Going to do catering to do? I can't


decide what we have on, really. everyone a bit giddyap in the


north-west because it's the Derby today, isn't it? It is. It's United


at Old Trafford today. Who do you think - not who do you think - but


who do you want to win? Obviously, I am completely unbiased - in a


second they'll go in here. I am unbiased, but if I had my choice of


who would win today, they'd be wearing sky blue. Being a Liverpool


fan, they're your biggest enemies, aren't they? What I would say about


that is whenever Liverpool played Manchester United, I felt both


clubs buried the hatchet and said, it's time we stop all the hideous


chatter. I hate all of that. That hatred thing hopefully goes. I have


had enough of that. Stick to the football. I agree with you. I just


want Mario Balotelli to play. Do you hear what he did yesterday or


the day before? He set off a load of fireworks in his house. I am not


laughing - because it's a stupid thing to do. But it's mental, isn't


it? Hilarious. We sweat down the onions. We get in the smoked bacon,


sweat that down as well. What you would probably do is I would cook


the onions, let them get soft, take them out of the pan or fry the


bacon, then the onions. I am sticking to this because that's all


we need to do. Let's pretend, Tim... Why would you want to do them


separately? I like building up the flavours. At the end of the day,


what I want to do have the heat high for the bacon so it gets


crispy, take it out of the pan, drop the heat down, then cook the


onions slowly so we get that natural sweetness. That's just me.


You don't have to do that at all. You could theoretically chuck all


of this in at the same time and it would work, but we want to build


the flavour. Give the parsley a little bit of a chop. This is all


about balance. When you're doing anything like a casserole, you want


to get a good balance. Let's imagine we cooked down the bacon


and onion for six minutes or so. What we do is put the chicken back


in. Remember, we put it in with a little bit of flour. Of course, as


we add moisture to this dish, the flour will give it a little bit of


thickening, so you're not going to have to worry about whether it's


going to be too thin or not. Once we have the chicken back in, add


your sherry into there. This works with any kind of sherry. It goes in


there? It will do at the end. This works with any kind at all. It


works with port. It works with red wine. It works with beer. It's the


booze and the stock combined that'll give us a nice flavour. If


you were cooking this with beer, I might say add a little bit of sugar


so it stays nice and sweet. OK. bring that up to the boil. This is


a fast one. Normally, with a casserole, it would be a long cook.


If you were going to do this with chicken thighs, it might take a


long time. Have a little sniff. It's amazing. It smells wintry.


can smell the sherry. When you're heating it this much, are you going


to lose all the moisture from it? It will reduce down. When that


happens, always the temptation is you'll put more stock in it. I


would say put more water in, not stock. If it does reduce too much,


add a little bit of water into it. Chuck those in, give it a bit of a


stir around. Nice. Then we want to just thicken the sauce a little bit


and give it an extra flavour and make it a little bit glossy, so


what we do is add butter. In that goes and give that a little bit of


a whisk around. Ideally, if you put cold butter in it, it works better.


Move things to one side. Give it a stir-around so it works. So we have


all the sherry, the stock, the butter, the bacon and everything in


there. Then, of course, it's quite heavy - the flavours are big and


heavy in there, so let's add some delicious parsley in there to make


it nice and grassy. What we have done to serve this - with anything,


you can serve it with rice, with vegetables, a bit of spinach,


whatever you fancy, but what I've done is we have sauteed off some


potatoes so you've got a nice little bit of carbohydrate in there,


a nice bit of crunch. They sit like that then we'll have... It does


smell good. One of those on there. This is the best. Time of year for


food, Tim. For clothes and food! Autumn is the best time. Then we


spoon over this delicious sauce. And then finally, we add...


these flaked almonds there? Can I sprinkle on? Please feel free to


sprinkle it on, Mr Baillie. So you have sherry, flaked almonds, all


the flavours in there. Dig in. do you doll this? It's sherry-


braised chicken. Sherry-braised chicken? OK. Let's have a bit of a


What do you think? Autumny. Quite delicate flavour. Yeah, because the


chicken makes it nice and... Hearty. That's delicious! I can imagine


that - walking the dogs, coming in out of the cold wind sitting down


to a plate of that, fantastic. you got dogs? Yeah, we have four


dogs. Four? Four! You said that like I am a Komodo dragon. One of


my favourite animals, the Komodo dragons. It's not like I say I have


three dogs and a injuroff. It is a lot. What sort of dogs are they?


am afraid to say now. You're just going to lash out and stab me in


the arm with a fork. Bill is cooking dessert later. What are you


doing? An apple and passion fruit meringue. Fantastic. That recipe is


on our website. You can also e-mail your questions for Bill or Rafe at


SFTW. Are you weird or what? What's wrong with you? Why can't you have


a hamster like normal people? are they called? Teddy, banjo and


Brackon. Three are feral dogs we got on holiday. We took pity on


them. How are they getting on with the language barriers? Fine. I do


signing. "Do you want -" it's amazing how it works. There is


frost on the ground, and Attenborough is back on the telly.


It's reached the ocean, and millions of tonnes of ice have lost


the support of their rocky bed. These icefalls are an ominous sign


of what is about to happen. There is a rupture deep within the


A colossal iceberg is born. And you can watch the incredible


cinematography of Frozen Planet Wednesday at 9.00pm. Amazing. You


have either watched our guests in Pete Versus Life or the hit Shadow


Lion. You won't be able to miss him playing Shakespeare himself in a


new film, Anonymous. You are the famous William Shakespeare whose


labours I have so enjoyed. I am at your service, sir. My expenses have


enlarged - grandised. If your Lordship does not agree to an


increase in my fee, then I shall be forced to make certain facts public.


Have you any idea to whom you are speaking? Yes, I am addressing the


writer of Hamlet - Giulio and Romeo, am I not? Get out. Wait. How much?


Something for the weekend's Raith Spall.


I'm an honest guy, I think it's brilliant. It's a fantastic film.


It's so different to anything I've seen recently. It's an old-


fashioned film. It's got the period aspect, which studios think are


hard to pay for. The director is known for directing things like


Independence Day and 2012, so it's a departure for him. The studios,


as a favour to him said, you can make your movie that you have


wanted to do for 20 years to do this period piece. This works.


us what it's about. Without giving away too much because I'm seeing it


tomorrow morning. It's about who wrote Shakespeare's plays and


there's lots of conspiracies floating around that this man


didn't write the plays and this film centres on the theory that it


was a guy who was the Earl of Oxford. I play Shakespeare but mine


is like Fakes-speare but I'm just an actor that got lucky. If the


story's not real, it's obviously a huge conspiracy theory, but you get


so engrossed and you think it's real and when it's finished I think,


no, I don't want it to be real because I like the idea. You like


the idea of this guy writing a huge body of work. One person could have


written Julius caesar and Macbeth and Mim someer Night's Dream, I


don't believe Edward De Vere wrote it but if people want to Google him


and watch it with a new set of eyes... People love conspiracy


theories. Yes and the film is not dry, it's not intellectual, it's a


cracking good story, like a thriller. I'm not interested in


being in films that are boring and dry. It's fun and it rips alone and


it's engaidgeing and it's for everyone -- edge gauging. You've


shot a lot of of it on CGI. Period were tough to do years ago because


you had to create huge sets, now you can create immense depth?


exactly and it's pretty weird doing green screen in period costume. If


you are dressed as Shakespeare and everything is green around you


that,'s weird. But that's the merit of having someone like Rowland


doing it, there are big aeriel shots, have been though helicopter


weren't invented then, of 17th century London, which hasn't been


seen before. Period pieces are closed in and small, but this is


huge with a big scope. Was it hard as an actor, because Shakespeare is


your God as an actor. Was it hard to say yes to the film because


there are conspiracy theories in it and you are belittling him? Nah!


Good! I'm an actor, I want to do good parts, I'm not going to go, to,


that's offensive to me and my fellow actors. Yeah, I'll do it,


when do I start?! You also like doing the TV stuff. I liked you on


Friday. Yes, it's a simple thing to say, but comedy's either funny or


it's not and my programme was a rip a minute, it's a comedy drama, it's


straight up comedy. We've got a clip, but explain what happens in


it? I play a sports writer called Pete who is a socially inept


awkward all-round loser. I don't know why they cast me! The general


can see is that he has two Sky Sports type commentators who are


supposed to comment Tate on the football but I comment on the


mundaneness of his life. You and Chloe are back together. That's...


Yes, it is, isn't it. How did you two hook up again? Erm, well, we


bumped into each other and Eva Cassidy was doing a tribute concert


and we did it. He's been keeping an eye on her on Facebook for a few


months. He engineered bumping into it. But he did have to buy Eva


Cassidy albums. It's like a knife in the guts. Some of it is so


cringey, I was thinking, oh, my gosh, imagine that situation.


British comedy travels and one of the things that defines it is, it's


we like to be embarrassed because it makes us feel better about


ourselves, do you know what I mean, because we get into awkward


situations on a daily basis, so to see Someone in a worst situation.


It's comforting. You are getting so many movies now, so are you going


to give up the TV? No, I'm not one of those that thinks, I'm going to


just do films. I love doing telly, so I don't know why I'd stop doing


it. You are doing a new film, Prometheus, the new Ridley Scott


one, which is a prequel to Aliens? Yes. Which he directed the first


Alien? Yes, and I've been sent an e-mail about what I'm allowed to


say and I'm not allowed to say and I haven't read the e-mail. It's out


next June in Yes, it's part of the Alien franchise, I know that, I'm


in it, and I know that and chr Lyse Theron and Michael Fasbender. --


Charlize Theron. Alien is one of the best films ever made and it's


great to be there on set with a space suit with Ridley Scott


speaking to you. Incredible. Yes, it is, that's why I wanted to act,


to be an alien in a space suit. It happened, and it was a dream.


you seen a final version? No, they keep it under close wraps and tight


and don't let anyone see anything. Will it be as food as Alien? I hope


so. It's one of the best films ever made, so it's a high mantle, a high


bar, but this is the third sci-fi film Ridley Scott's ever directed,


the first two were Alien and Bladerunner, but knowing me, it


will probably be the worst one he's ever made!


I've been all over the Internet looking for trailers and things,


there's nothing out there is there? There's a few stills? There is


there are a few bits and pieces but they're propective of its --


protective of it. Raith is cooking so get your


questions in. You can tweet or e-mail us.


That is also the same for our other guest Bill Bailey. Here is what


else is coming up on the rest of today's show. X Factor, Dragons'


Den, Countryfile, they're all in the Impressions Show. I'll match


thee row's offer. Congratulations - - Theo's offer. Simon cooks up


speet potato massala. And we discover the meaning of


vocation in Young Nuns. Somehow I knew that that was where God wanted


me to be. Very shortly, we'll be checking out


the trick or treat must-haves with this little lot over there.Like at


them all! They're all there. Your son's there, is he? I don't know,


is he? I can't see. I think so. I can't see actually. OK, not at


the moment. We are going to look at those. But before that, Bill,


you're in the kitchen to do some cooking with us. I can't remember,


are you any good at cooking? I used to cook a lot, then I got quite


busy, my skills have gotten a bit Rusty, so I used to when I was


living on my own on a house boat. Oh, I was a dab hand. Then, I'd


knock up anything. How long did you live on a house boat for? Three


years. Any good? Great fun. It's never appealed to me that. Great


fun. A bit cold in the winter. was going to say it must be cold.


bit nippy, but if you don't mind scraping barnacles off your hole


every now and again, it's quite fun. We've all done that. Did you move


it or stay in one place? You can take them up and down the river but


I stayed in one place, it was a nice little community. Big inside?


Yes, massive. Like a Tardis. many rooms do they have? Mine had a


bedroom and a living area and a galley, you know, and a wheel house.


It was... Did you live in it by chance because it's never something


that appealed to me, but did you say, I fancy that or... It was out


of financial restraints I think. I'd have preferred a flat, but it


was cheap, you know, and at the time I thought, this is a cheap way


of living in London because the mooring fees at the time were quite


small so you know, you'd get a phone line, you know, bottled gas


for your cooking and a little heater. It was good fun. Did you


have electricity plumbed in as well? Yes, and a little stove. It


was great. I might look into that! Yes, with your pipe like that, like


Popeye. Down the canal. We are going to make an apple and passion


fruit meringue tart. Pastry is milk, egg, butter, flour, shugary, and


the filling is passion fruit, sugar, apples and egg whites and sugar for


the topping. -- sugar. Flour sugar butter, add the egg, bind it and


bake it so the tart case is done. It's mundane our first task on this,


Bill. It's peeping apples. So you grab a peeler, any peeler. You are


going to be in Doctor Who this year, aren't you? Yes, I'm in the


Christmas special. Who are you playing? Obviously I'm sworn to


secrecy, but I am ploying a human's oid. A lot of people have saying --


have been saying, they'll save a few quid for the make-up. --


playing a humanoid. He's like a futuristic space person.


I do have to cut these? Yes, then if you cut down the middle and cut


it across again, then you can cut the core out. OK. Still into birds,


bird-watching? Yes, birds, yeah, Look at that!


My friend Kerry, lovely bloke, filmmaker, one day was on holiday


with his wife and suddenly all these people turned up from nowhere


with cameras looking at this bird and he was fascinate sod he thought


I'm going to make a film about these people. So he tried to lack


into them and it's gone native because he's become one himself,


he's become so obsessed. Gone a bit ferrel? Yes. I've got mates who've


done bird-watching. He's doing a music, bird and art festival where


people are all coming tot about it all. It becomes obsessive? Yes,


when I was a kid, we used to go to Slimbridge to some of the bird


sanctuarys, so it became like the kind of classic family day out.


We'd go to the reservoir and see if we could see a grebe, you know.


That was part of my childhood, you know. So it followed that when I'm


touring, I take the binoculars to see what I can see because I've


just got this thing, I needed to know the names of things. I got to


the point where I have a child and I want to know, I want to tell him


the names of bird in the garden, I don't want to look out there and go,


oh, I don't know what that that is, it's a sense of wanting to know the


world around you. It's good to get out. There are conspiracy theories


going on about which birds are extinct and which are still around


and things like that, isn't there? Yes, there are hard core bird-


watchers, the twitch,, they're on the pagers all the time, you know,


and it's like oh, one in Devon, go, go, go, and I'm not quite at that


level. Do you fall into different categories where you say, I'm


massively interested in a certain type of bird. That's true, that's


rieblt. But -- that's right. But there are certain people that, you


know, little song bird and small ones, they're just little brown


bird, you know, why are you interested in that now for, you


know, and the other people will say, I like song bird an garden birds.


think I would go for herons and King fishers. You would be near


water and you would see them. see heron everywhere. And flamingos.


Some in Manchester as well now. Manchester parakeets - all right.


All right. How am I doing with this? Beautiful. Whilst you have


been slicing, I have put them in a pan with some sugar. We cut those


down nice and soft. Next, I have scooped out all the passion fruit


pulps. Now we're getting delicious perfume into there. Tip that in and


mix it all together. Look at that. The people I like when they have


hobbys are the storm chasers. would love to do that. You don't


get that in Britain, do you? You get drig -- drizzle chasers! Light


drizzle, everyone, in Manchester! Light drizzle. It's not going to


happen, is it? I was driving through America once with my mate.


There was a twister. I was like, go for it. See what happens. He didn't.


He got scared. I thought that would be exciting, to chase the weather


around. That's delicious, but we want to top it with meringue. So


Bill, that's all cooked. But you don't cook the passion fruit?


All that's going to happen now is the meringue will go back in the


oven so it will warm. Warm up. Start whisking that fella, then I


will tip in sugar as we go. We're going to do this quickly. Basically,


add the sugar a little at a time, whisk it, as it combines add more


so it becomes nice and toffee-ish. We haven't got time to do that.


Let's imagine. Does this switch off at all or I... Just hold it forever.


Brilliant. This is soft. As you whisk it more and more and more, it


will get thicker and become easy to manipulate. Basically, what we do


is - see how soft that is? You lift it so it stays in position.


peaks. Put it in the oven, five minutes or so, and what you end up


with is this one we did earlier., if you remember. Oh, yeah, the one


like this. Because we want it to be really fruity, you want a solid,


you can add the egg in. I don't want that. I want the fruit. It's


English apple season. You want all of this delicious fruit, so I'll


get a big slab. I mate made it with my own hands - not even my hands -


my eyebrows! Thanks, Rafe. Thanks, mate. Look at that. Can I grab a


blackberry with it? Grab a blackberry. Rafe is in the kitchen.


What he's doing? A sweet potato curry. I look forward to that.


That's beautiful. And your fruit - one of your five a day. Right.


Cocktails with Wayne next. But first, the second and last chance


to guess the year of the number one - the news stories and the film in


# What about breakfast at Tiffany's?


# She said I think I remember the Fillmont


# Yes, I recall I think we both # Kind of liked it


# I said that's the first thing we have got. The world's first


processed food to be made from modified food is to go on sale here.


It was for and away the most serious incident in the Channel


Tunnel's two years of operation. The fire broke out when the train


was approximately 12 miles out of Calais. After an absence of 700


years the stone of destiny is returning to Scotland. It has been


kept at Westminster Abbey ever at Tiffany's? She said, "I think I


remember the -"" Enough is enough. You have cajoled and killed and


used it with people from the inside. You want to shake hands with the


devil. That's fine. I just want to make sure you do it in hell.


What year GM food goes on sale - Rafe, what year do you reckon that


was? '95. What did you reckon? bit later, '99. The answer will be


revealed at the end of the show. Rafe, we're making cocktails. Do


you like a cocktail? I do. What's your favourite? A martini with


tanquaray. I like it dry, learned it from Madmen. We were out at the


Savoy, and they spent forever making this old-fashioned, stir and


stir. Nice and cold. But we're not making that. We're making dessert.


We're doing a liquid alternative to a couple of great desserts we love,


cheesecake and apple cremeon. This is a cheesecake cocktail with


Mascarpone cheese. I am using it for the actual texture. Lovely.


You use natural yogurt because it has a sour edge to it. That'll help.


A good tablespoon of that goes in, followed by our sweetener, a bit of


vanilla. We need to have that. Then we're going to have a good shot and


a half of vodka, like that, a bit of lemon liqueur. By the way, you


can hear children in the background. We're about to do a Hallowe'en


special with the kids and the outfits. That's what they're here


for - not the cocktails! Lemon zest will make it nice and fragrant and


give it that cheesecake character. So you would have this instead of a


dessert? Totally. This is a dessert that ends with happiness.


there because there is not much flavour in Mascarpone, but it


emulsifys nicely and gives it a nice texture to the drink. I am


going to give you one each. You can serve this with coffee.


That's like a sherry glass. Like a shot? You can see the thickness and


texture of it. Easy. The last thing is a little bit of digestive


crumble on top. When you drink it, it tastes just like lemon


cheesecake. Cheers. Cheers. Really surprisingly cheesecake in


character. That is exactly like a liquid cheesecake. That's lovely.


That's delicious, really good. one is a little twist on an apple


crumble. We have some Bramley apple sauce there, a little bit of lemon


juice, acid - sweetener, sugar, a pinch of ground allspice, nutmeg


and cinnamon, which you'll find in traditional apple crumble. Then


whiskey which goes fantastic with apple flavours and things like


liqueurs. You have to have green liqueur to give it a little apple


bite to it. We'll give it a nice shape-up as well. Are these - when


you make these sort of drinks, are they popular? You'll see more


restaurants are serving more alternative liquid desserts with


coffee. I think it's nice if you don't want to have a full dessert.


It's very creative. You learn a lot from various chefs at different


restaurants. We have a glass of crushed ice here. In an Old


Fashioned you need a nice cube of ice. What's the difference between


crushed and cubes? Normally, you have nice solid, fresh ice, it will


help to maintain the temperature for longer without diluting it. Now


you have these wonderful companies making big blocks of ice. Wow, one


big cube in a drink. Once you have the right dilution, you pour it


over a cube, and it just stays cold. Without the dilution. So we have


apple sauce on top, goes in there. There is our crumble. So you have


the crumbly ice as well. I have never had a biscuit drink!


LAUGHTER You could blend up some Oreo


cookies. That would work. Have a try of that. It tastes just like


that spiced apple. You have the blended Scottish working with the


apple... That's really, really lovely. It's like a strudel.


would be really happy with that. Cheers! Nice. Those cocktails can


be found on our website. These guys are at the top of their game at the


moment. It's the Imelda Mayhem with Do it in soya. Lack together gives


me glass. A real man wouldn't worry about gas. Blow it out. Let them


know you're there. Yes, your Holiness. It was me. You might want


to open a window. I have another one brewing. Tea. Four sugars, love.


I'll get these. How much? �4.50, please. OK. I am going to offer you


all of the money, but I get 100% of the drinks. I don't really care who


gets the drinks. I just need �4.50. Now, hang on, hang on, hang on,


hang on. Now, you've still got another Dragon in here. Let me tell


you where I am at. I own one of the leading retail outlets in the


country. It's not relevant, but always feel the need to mention it.


Make an offer or butt out. right. I will! I'm prepared to


offer you the �2.25, but I am going to want 50% of the drinks. I don't


care if you pay separately. I just need the �4.50. OK. I'll match his


offer. Congratulations. You've got yourselves two Dragons. Well done,


Theo. I like the way you buy coffee. I'm out, but you can see all the


stars in The Imelda Mayhem Thursday, 8.30pm on BBC One. It's time for


some things for the weekend. Hallowe'en has come a little bit


early to the studio, hasn't it? How many weeks away is it? Next week,


next weekend. We're getting into the spirit of things here on


Something For the Weekend. See what I am doing there? Good. We're going


to start with Ollie and George. Do you want to come over?


SCREAM I know Ollie has been extremely


excited about wearing the mummy's outfit all day - highlight of his


week. Can you see through that? really. Hello. How are you? This is


George. Tasty, isn't it Who is quite possibly one of the jolliest


babies I ever met. Hello, ras cal. What are they... The outfit is from


reddot.co.uk. George is wearing the pumpkin outfit, �10 from Tesco.


Thank you, George. Give it back. Urrrgh! Got it. Thanks, Ollie.


little brothers now, who are possibly the coolest dudes. Come on


over. Do you want to stand there? Come in here. That's it. Now,


dressed as Dracula, as you'll see. We have practised this before. Do a


twirl for us. There we go! These costumes are from ASDA. If you


sponsor one of these - good boy, Frank. Stanley, do you want to put


those down as well? We have practised this. Let's hope it works.


These are the Hex-Book Spiders. There we go. Whose is that one?


They can be everybody's. We'll share. Do you have a remote


control? I do. These are the Hex Book Spiders. You get one, but you


can control more than one. They have a 360-degree rotation on the


top. They're not going! Maybe give them a bit of a kick then. Do you


like them? Marks out of ten? Marks out of ten? Go on. Good boys. Thank


you very much. And do you want to wave to your friends? Off you go.


Expertly done. Alfie, are you coming over? Lift your mask up so


you can see what you're doing. Come and join us here. Alfie is dressed


as Jack Skellington, a very cool outfit. Do you like that outfit?


Yes. In your hand there you have the headphones... Scary! Put your


mask back on. Cheeky. Can you pass me one of those quickly? These are


Let's dance, Alfie. You must have some moves in your locker? How are


you going to woo the girls? Down with the kids. I think he thinks we


are both geeky. That one's �1.99? Yes, thumbs up? Yes. We'll finish


with that one. You would like to move on that way, Alfie. Good boy.


Little Grace. She's dressed as a little witch. Very pretty little


witch though, aren't you?! Is that you?! This outfit is from


Wilkinson's, it's �5. You like this, don't you, it's a pretty one and


the make-up. What is in your hands? The Monster High Doll. Do you like


this? Yes. How many marks out of ten? Ten's the best. Do you think


ten? Yes. The we turn it round so we can see it on the camera. Good


girl. These are from �14.99 and related to spooky people, this is


the daughter of a ghost. They're not really scary are they? No.


We like them. OK, Dax, another cool name, this is


Bill's son. Come and join us. Bailey's son. You've done this


before, haven't you? Yes. Show us your face. Give us a peep! Cool


hair as well. This outfit is from Sainsbury's,


12-�146789 does it get the thumbs up from you, Dax? Yes. What have


you got in your hand, a drink? blood. Inspired by the series, this


is the True Blood. Do you want to pour some for us?


I'll take that, you pour it. Have you tried this already? No.


we've got the taste test. Pour me some as well. OK. It's very nice.


That's it. A bit heavy handed. There we go. Do you want to try


that? Blood-type C, I believe. Done this before? Do you like that?


It's very sweet. You're a cool dude you, Dax, aren't you? Does it get


the thumbs up? Yes. It's not cheap but it's the blood they use in the


HBO series and it's �5.95. Dax take your blood that way. We've got your


two little rascals, Grace and Rose. Loving the make-up!. So, Grace,


what have you got a The white chocolate skull that is �100.


What?! With the decoration. Stick that in a bag afterwards and flog


it on eBay. It's cheaper without the lovely decorations. What have


you got? A jelly brain and that's �20 and it looks yummy and smells


like strawberries. OK, take a bite then. The pirate outfit from Tesco


is �10 this one and Sainsbury's this one 8-12 pounds. Do you want


to join us? Get a bite out of there, out the middle of it. That's it.


That's better, well done Dax. Come in prbgs kids, all of you. There


you go, come in. Thanks to Nikki and Dax Bailey and the other little


monsters there. For more information on the Halloween stuff


e-mail us via the website and we'll get it back to you. This is a


documentary on the aspect of life that we don't hear that much about.


Clara is about to enter a life of poverty, chastity, obedience and


silence in Young Nuns. You can actually click on the nuns on a


virtual tour and see them having their recreation. They have their


summer hats on. They're quite cute. Clara's chosen a life of silence


and contemplation. When she enters the Abbey, she'll spend up to seven


hours a day in prayer. You're not raetly meant to talk and have a


kofpb station about in addition -- -- you're not really meant to talk


and have a conversation about anything. That will get to me, the


silence, and at meal times as well, trying not to talk and laugh.


many communities of nuns are struggling to survive, Clara's


order is flour ushing. In the last five years, they've welcomed eight


new sisters, the youngest only 19. I just felt really happy there and


somehow I knew that that was where God wanted me to be. I felt this


amazing sense of peace that I hadn't felt before.


Fascinating story there, you can follow that journey in Young Nuns


on Tuesday at 10.35 on BBC One. Raith, you made it into the kitchen.


I'm here. Remind us how good you are? I asked you to -- I remember


you asked me to separate an egg white from a yolk and I did it.


did. I tickled it. What is this about you liking chicken livers?


a bolognese. Never done that before. Not a fan of liver but if you put


it in a bolognese, soak 'em in milk, chop 'em up fine, fry them with the


mince, it's the nice, rich, creamy flavour and put all the milk in as


well. You know your stuff. Sort of. What are we doing now? A simple


curry. It's about the curry this, speet potato and peas. It's about


making your own curry sauce really cumin, peas, coriander, curry


powder, chilli, garlic, ginger, tomatoes, white wine, coconut milk,


cinnamon and sweet potatoes. I'm going to toast the spices. In the


real world, you would do this slowly, so I would put them in a


cold pan, turn the heat on... them dry? Yes. If ever you have


eaten a curry and it has that bitterness behind it, generally


they don't toast the spices. What you want to do is release the oils


from the spices and so dry frying them is what you need to do. We are


cooking them too quickly really. If you do it gently, as it warms, the


oil releases at a more even rate. We are just doing it quickly. You


can smell already the cumin seeds start to have a nose on them. If


you do it slowly, that will take five minutes. Will it burn more


easily as well like that? Of course, yes, because it's really, really


high. On a lower heat and every now and again give it a move around.


Stpwh you don't want to let them burn. Yes. You've had an


interesting relationship with food in your life, haven't you?


suppose you could say that. lost what? Five-and-a-half stone.


You support drals and you would go to the football matches and buy


what, two hot dogs? Yes, I would watch them, buy two hot dogs and a


packet of minstrels for pudding. And you would eat that? Yes, that


was after lunch. -- you support Crystal Palace. If you fancy making


your own curry or anything spicy, this is great to have. Before we


did the prawns and grind it with a pesle and mortar, but because of


this, wanting it to be nice and fine, it's great. And the finer,


the better. Then just tip those straight in. It's not ready yet.


Oh! That made me jump. Is that just like that, you just open it?


came off completely before. thought you were good in the


kitchen. Never used one of these before. Gadgets are the things that


do it for all of us. Tip those in there. How do you get the lid off?


Go for tit. There you go. Tip those in and they could do with maybe


being a little finer. Grind those down and again, on a low heat.


Straightaway, you smell the coriander and a lovely bit of per


yuem aroma. The next thing, as they cook away matchsticking on your


ginger, please, young man -- perfume aroma. Slices and then


little strips. I - Liz Evans said, I love your character in the


shadowline, what was it like a play a dark character? Brilliant. I've


done lots of character so it's nice to do something a bit serious. It's


fun playing a psychopath, you know. But I got married during the making


of that so that was a funny thing, you know, playing such a terrible


character and then... Being nice at home? Yes. That must have been


tricky. Well... Do you take your characters home with you or not?


You're not allowed to really, you can't because you get home and you


have to empty the dishwasher and take the bins out, so you're not


really allowed. Tell us about One Day? Yes, the adaptation of the


Dave Nicholls book One Day. He adapted his own screen play with


Ann Hathaway and Dean stur Jess and I play the boy that Ann doesn't end


up with -- Sturgss. -- Sturgess. People say you stole the show on


that? Not sure about that. It's nice to have pride in it? It's nice


to know people do like it, yes. We've got all the spices. This is


smelling love lift even though we should cook it more slowly. Chuck


all the ginger in there as well. We've done this in three minutes,


when in reality, it would take 12 or 15. Nice and slow. That goes in.


And then, cube a bit of sweet potato for me. We glug in a bit of


white wine into this. All of that goes in so we get that delicious


boozey flavour. You could add stock to it. Something quite nice about


wine in curries, Vindaloo is based around wed rhine, -- red wine.


You don't think of wine being in Indian cooking for some reason, do


you? A lot of the original spices came from Portugal. I see. Vindaloo


is wine and potatoes vin-da-loo. Genius. You don't cook this first,


it goes straight in? Once that's gone in, add water as the wine


reduces, and we end up with this. Now you can add spinach to it, you


could add chick peas, aubergine, whatever you fancy, but it's about


making the curry sauce. We are going to add a couple of peas.


Cooked peas? Frozen, yes. Can you throw them in frozen? Yes. Chuck in


a bit of coconut milk. Stir that around and finally we are going to


chop in a bit of coriander. It's about that curry sauce which is


dead ease. Grind the spices, fry them off, cinnamon, tomatoes,


whatever veg you want and it's that simple. You end up with a really


delicious home-made curry that's better than anything you are going


to buy anywhere else. To serve it, we've got a bit of rice there,


we've got a bit of naan bread so it's a proper one. When you make


curry, it never tastes like it does as a take away. That will be nicer,


without the shadow of a doubt because it's your own creation. The


thing about it is, once you start making your own curries, you will


find flavours that you like, so it might well be that you like more


cardamom in it or cumin. What about garamasala? Again, if there are


basic flavours you like, you love that so add that into it. You keep


doing that, but we need to find out about Deja View, Tim? We are busy


eating this. Deja View, genetically modified tomatoes went on sale and


Deep Blue Something sang. It's 1996. You said that to me then you


changed it. Yes. Have a go at that. You were so


far out, Simon. When does your tour begin? November in Birmingham. All


around the country and we end up in Belfast beginning of December.


was talking to you earlier, you have another TV thing coming up,


it's interesting because it's another conspiracy theory? Yes, a


documentary about Alfred Wallace, a contemporary of Darwin and a lot of


people think that Wallace actually was the originator of the theory of


evolution and that Darwin appropriated his ideas. Is nothing


sacred? What next, Jesus isn't the son of God. Can't believe anyone


now. Is it a drama or a documentary?


I've never even heard of that. was an amateur biologist and


explorer and travelled around the world. He came up with a theory,


having studied insects and birds, he used to collect them and send


them back to Britain. He wrote a letter to Darwin and he looked at


them and that's what prompted hum to publish the theory of evolution.


I'm getting on the Internet! I will steal his idea, make lots of money


and become famous. That is it, it's the end of the show, thanks to our


Download Subtitles