Salon Maggi Noggi Y Salon


Download Subtitles

SRT

ASS


Salon Maggi Noggi

Eleri Siôn, Yws Gwynedd a Dewi Pws sy'n cadw cwmni i Maggi Noggi a Joyce mewn rhifyn arbennig. Secrets galore as Eleri Siôn, Yws Gwynedd & Dewi Pws join Maggi Noggi and Joyce in...


Similar Content

Browse content similar to Salon Maggi Noggi. Check below for episodes and series from the same categories and more!

Transcript


LineFromTo

-.

0:00:000:00:00

-Hoh-hoh-hoh.

0:00:010:00:02

-Rejoice for Joyce, my little lovely.

0:00:030:00:07

-That rhymes!

0:00:070:00:09

-Jesus Christ, I deserved a programme

-just for myself.

0:00:100:00:14

-What's that on your head, Joyce? Did

-an elf crash land on your brains?

0:00:350:00:41

-I've come from outer space!

0:00:410:00:44

-Nice Christmas? Was it OK?

0:00:440:00:46

-Sion Corn came.

0:00:470:00:49

-How's Gwenno? The old pussy

-must be frozen in this cold weather.

0:00:490:00:54

-She doesn't go out. She just

-goes out to do what she needs to do.

0:00:540:00:58

-It's a terrible thing...

0:00:580:01:00

-..when your pussy's scratching

-the back door wanting to get out.

0:01:010:01:05

-That sounds like New Year's Eve

-in Llanfair Mathafarn Eithaf.

0:01:050:01:09

-What are you like?

0:01:110:01:13

-Did you have a night out

-in Llanfair Mathafarn Eithaf?

0:01:130:01:17

-It was cold.

0:01:170:01:19

-My nipples were like hat pegs

-in a chapel.

0:01:190:01:22

-Hiya, how are you?

0:01:290:01:31

-Dear me.

0:01:340:01:36

-Are you alright there, love?

0:01:360:01:38

-Yeah, yeah.

0:01:390:01:40

-Where are you from?

0:01:400:01:42

-Where are you from?

-

-Barry. Well, yeah. Now, yeah.

0:01:420:01:44

-Ba... Down in the south?

0:01:440:01:46

-Yes. Are you Welsh?

0:01:470:01:49

-Yes, I'm Welsh.

0:01:490:01:52

-Lucky I didn't say

-anything about her in Welsh.

0:01:520:01:55

-Where are you from?

0:01:550:01:57

-Where are you from?

-

-Aberaeron originally. Just outside.

0:01:570:01:59

-I'm Maggi.

0:02:000:02:01

-How are you? Are you alright?

0:02:010:02:03

-It's nice to meet you.

0:02:040:02:06

-This is Joyce.

0:02:060:02:08

-Hiya, Joyce, are you OK?

0:02:080:02:10

-Hiya, Joyce, are you OK?

-

-She doesn't say much.

0:02:100:02:12

-She's just a decoration

-in the corner.

0:02:120:02:15

-I recognise your face.

0:02:150:02:19

-Do you recognise her, Joyce?

0:02:190:02:21

-Do you recognise her, Joyce?

-

-I know who she is.

0:02:210:02:22

-You don't.

0:02:220:02:23

-Oh, my God. I know who you are.

-You're Eleri Sion.

0:02:240:02:28

-You're on Radio Wales.

0:02:300:02:32

-In English. Every day.

0:02:330:02:36

-You were on, oh, I loved it...

0:02:370:02:39

-I'm so happy now.

-I've come over all funny.

0:02:390:02:42

-You've lost your head.

0:02:420:02:44

-You've lost your head with

-those sticking out of your brains.

0:02:440:02:48

-The other week, you had Bananarama.

0:02:490:02:52

-Oh, my gosh, yes.

0:02:520:02:54

-They've reformed

-and they're performing everywhere.

0:02:540:02:57

-They look good. They must

-have had some tips from Joyce.

0:02:580:03:02

-I think so.

0:03:020:03:03

-How old is Joyce? How old are you?

0:03:040:03:05

-How old is Joyce? How old are you?

-

-I'm not going to tell you.

0:03:050:03:07

-Eighty-one.

0:03:070:03:08

-Joyce, have you had any work done?

0:03:090:03:12

-No, it's embalming fluid.

0:03:120:03:14

-Oh, my gosh.

0:03:140:03:16

-No, Eleri!

0:03:160:03:18

-Have you heard this - the best thing

-for skin in the morning...

0:03:190:03:23

-..is if you wee in a jar...

0:03:230:03:28

-..and then dab a flannel in it

-and wash your face.

0:03:280:03:32

-No. You don't say.

0:03:330:03:34

-I'm not trying that. Have you?

0:03:350:03:37

-I'm not trying that. Have you?

-

-No, never.

0:03:370:03:39

-Has no-one pissed on your head?

0:03:390:03:42

-I bet you someone has in Felinheli.

0:03:430:03:46

-Anyway, and another thing

-since you're a celeb, Preparation H.

0:03:490:03:54

-Preparation H?

0:03:550:03:56

-Preparation H?

-

-For haemorrhoids.

0:03:560:03:58

-Under here? Does it work?

0:03:580:04:01

-Look!

0:04:010:04:03

-I'm living proof.

0:04:030:04:05

-I said to myself, if they can shrink

-grapes hanging from your backside...

0:04:050:04:11

-..think what they could

-do to your face.

0:04:110:04:15

-So anyway, tell me, Eleri...

0:04:150:04:18

-..this one is multi-talented, Joyce.

0:04:190:04:21

-She's a correspondent...

0:04:220:04:25

-Do you know

-what correspondent means, Cara?

0:04:250:04:29

-You specialised in sport.

0:04:310:04:33

-You specialised in sport.

-

-That's what I used to do.

0:04:330:04:35

-That must be strange, working in

-the middle of a butch man's world.

0:04:350:04:41

-What do you like?

0:04:410:04:43

-What do you like?

-

-Rugby. Nigel Owens.

0:04:430:04:44

-Nigel ticks your boxes.

0:04:440:04:47

-Or something bald,

-like Gareth Thomas.

0:04:470:04:50

-You like Gareth?

0:04:500:04:51

-Yes. You named your son after him.

0:04:520:04:54

-Well, no. After Dad.

0:04:540:04:57

-His name's Alffi.

0:04:570:05:00

-Rob Jones is a former rugby player.

0:05:000:05:03

-He asked, "What have you called

-him?" I replied, "Alffi George".

0:05:030:05:08

-"Oh, my gosh, you've named him

-after Alfie and George Michael.

0:05:080:05:14

-"What's wrong with you?"

0:05:150:05:17

-That's camper than Christmas.

0:05:170:05:20

-That must have inspired you

-to get married...

0:05:200:05:24

-..to a footballer.

0:05:240:05:27

-He proposed three times.

-I turned him down twice.

0:05:270:05:31

-Was he romantic?

0:05:310:05:33

-Was he romantic?

-

-The first time he proposed...

0:05:330:05:35

-..he'd written it down.

0:05:360:05:38

-Not him. He asked Dad how to write

-"will you marry me" in Welsh.

0:05:390:05:45

-Love him.

0:05:450:05:46

-Love him.

-

-Dad had some Rizlas.

0:05:460:05:48

-He took out his Rizla packet...

0:05:480:05:52

-..and wrote it down for him

-but not phonetically.

0:05:520:05:55

-He's not Welsh?

0:05:550:05:57

-He doesn't speak Welsh.

-He comes from the Wrexham area.

0:05:570:06:02

-He sat in front of me and said,

-"I've got something to tell you.

0:06:020:06:06

-"I've got something to ask you."

0:06:070:06:09

-I said, "Listen, if you're not

-actually going to learn...

0:06:090:06:13

-"..how to say it properly,

-I'm not saying yes."

0:06:130:06:15

-On your bike!

0:06:160:06:17

-I've never been one for marriage.

0:06:170:06:19

-Is there no-one special

-in your life?

0:06:200:06:23

-What's the point in buying a book

-when you can visit the library?

0:06:230:06:28

-That reminds me. I went

-to the Eisteddfod this year.

0:06:310:06:34

-You used to compete

-in the eisteddfod.

0:06:350:06:38

-You'd sing.

0:06:390:06:41

-Did you sing solo

-or sing in a group?

0:06:410:06:43

-I sang solo and I sang in duets.

0:06:440:06:48

-Did you use your experience

-to empathise...

0:06:490:06:53

-..with those poor souls

-on the Waw Ffactor?

0:06:530:06:57

-Do you know what - all of those on

-that series, and we filmed three...

0:06:570:07:02

-..all of them could sing.

0:07:020:07:05

-They were good.

0:07:050:07:08

-Duffy came second.

-Can you believe that?

0:07:080:07:12

-Duffy came second, then went on

-to make millions and win a Grammy.

0:07:120:07:18

-Who? Granny?

0:07:190:07:22

-No, a Grammy, you silly cow.

0:07:220:07:25

-She can't hear

-through those curlers.

0:07:250:07:28

-That elf! Look at the state of her.

0:07:280:07:31

-Tell me now...

0:07:320:07:33

-..what was the first thing

-you ever did?

0:07:340:07:36

-Cracabant.

0:07:360:07:39

-I only fuckin' asked!

0:07:400:07:42

-What did you say?

0:07:430:07:44

-Cracabant.

0:07:450:07:46

-Cracabant.

-

-I thought she'd sworn at me!

0:07:460:07:48

-It was a programme.

0:07:480:07:50

-Tell me about

-your Christmas traditions.

0:07:510:07:55

-I was home this year

-and it was lovely.

0:07:550:07:58

-We went skiing last year.

0:07:580:07:59

-My husband works away.

0:08:000:08:02

-Where does he work?

0:08:020:08:04

-Where does he work?

-

-With Aston Villa Football Club.

0:08:040:08:07

-No! Really? They're a celeb family.

-Goodness me.

0:08:070:08:12

-No, not really.

0:08:120:08:14

-Does he still have

-a footballer's body?

0:08:150:08:18

-Six foot five. I know.

0:08:190:08:22

-Don't bring him anywhere near Maggi.

-Is he in proportion?

0:08:220:08:26

-Oh, Eleri.

0:08:280:08:29

-No wonder you're smiling.

0:08:290:08:31

-If you had a crystal ball...

0:08:350:08:37

-..could you have foreseen

-this fabulous future...

0:08:370:08:41

-..with the lovely husband, your son

-and the Christmas traditions...

0:08:410:08:46

-..and the radio show

-in your poshest English?

0:08:460:08:49

-It's bilingual sometimes.

-I still struggle.

0:08:500:08:53

-It sounds as if you've swallowed

-a thesaurus.

0:08:530:08:56

-Really. I was listening to you

-with Bananarama.

0:08:560:09:01

-That's the only one you've heard.

0:09:010:09:03

-It's on replay.

-It takes me back to the '80s.

0:09:030:09:08

-Back in the '80s,

-I was in love with Paul Young.

0:09:080:09:11

-I interviewed Paul Young.

0:09:120:09:15

-You didn't? It's easy enough

-to go off someone, Joyce.

0:09:150:09:19

-This one's met them all.

0:09:200:09:22

-I was so excited...

0:09:230:09:25

-..and I said, "I've been waiting

-for this moment since I was 15.

0:09:270:09:32

-"I came to see you in the NEC

-in Birmingham.

0:09:320:09:35

-"I thought one day I'd meet you and

-I can't believe the day has come."

0:09:350:09:42

-He was in London

-and I was in Cardiff.

0:09:420:09:44

-He said, "I can see a picture

-of you in front of me.

0:09:450:09:48

-"Your blonde hair and blue eyes."

0:09:480:09:51

-I said, "Yeah, that's me."

-And I said, "Would you?"

0:09:510:09:55

-Really?

0:09:580:09:59

-"Only joking! Don't answer it!

0:10:000:10:02

-"If it's not yes, don't answer it."

0:10:020:10:05

-Fair play to you, Eleri.

0:10:060:10:08

-Tell me, Eleri, sometimes

-the world can be a cruel place.

0:10:080:10:13

-It's in need of some colour.

0:10:140:10:16

-If you could throw some glitter

-over something to make it better...

0:10:170:10:23

-..what would it be?

0:10:230:10:25

-My bingo wings.

0:10:250:10:27

-You don't have bingo wings.

0:10:270:10:29

-You don't have bingo wings.

-

-I hate my bingo wings.

0:10:290:10:32

-I'm like a Boeing 787.

0:10:320:10:34

-What a sight.

0:10:360:10:37

-How's that? Is that OK?

0:10:410:10:42

-Brilliant. You're a miracle worker.

0:10:420:10:45

-That's true.

0:10:460:10:47

-That's true.

-

-Thank you.

0:10:470:10:49

-I really appreciate it.

0:10:490:10:51

-Thank you.

0:10:530:10:55

-Nice to see you, nice to meet you.

-Happy new year.

0:10:550:10:58

-Look after yourself.

0:10:580:11:00

-And you. Ta-ra.

0:11:010:11:02

-Ta-ra, Eleri. Take care.

0:11:030:11:06

-What a lovely girl.

0:11:090:11:10

-Does Wil the seagull

-still come over?

0:11:110:11:14

-Every day, all day.

0:11:150:11:17

-No matter how much food

-I give her, she stays there.

0:11:180:11:21

-She?

0:11:220:11:23

-She?

-

-Wilhelmina. She's had a baby.

0:11:230:11:25

-Don't talk nonsense.

0:11:260:11:27

-Don't talk nonsense.

-

-She brings the baby to feed it.

0:11:270:11:30

-How many has she had?

0:11:300:11:31

-How many has she had?

-

-She lays the eggs on my roof.

0:11:310:11:33

-A fleet of them come down.

0:11:340:11:36

-You'll be like Janet

-from Hitchcock's The Birds.

0:11:360:11:40

-Don't!

0:11:400:11:42

-Hello.

0:11:430:11:44

-Hello. Hello, Joyce.

-I heard you were here.

0:11:450:11:48

-Dewi, how are you?

0:11:490:11:50

-Dewi, how are you?

-

-How are you?

0:11:500:11:52

-How's Rhiannon?

0:11:520:11:54

-How's Rhiannon?

-

-Better than nothing.

0:11:540:11:56

-Don't talk like that about my niece,

-please.

0:11:560:12:01

-We're related.

0:12:010:12:03

-I was about to ask

-if you knew each other.

0:12:030:12:06

-We've slept together a lot,

-in different beds!

0:12:060:12:09

-Goodness me.

0:12:130:12:14

-What are you going to do with that?

0:12:140:12:18

-What happened to your head?

0:12:200:12:23

-Do you know Emyr Wyn,

-the actor on Pobol y Cwm?

0:12:230:12:27

-We went into a pub in Cardiff, it

-fell silent and the barman said...

0:12:270:12:32

-.."If you put your heads together,

-you'd make an arse of yourselves."

0:12:320:12:38

-I remember that.

0:12:390:12:40

-Head massage then.

0:12:400:12:43

-You like one of those, don't you?

0:12:430:12:45

-There's something lovely

-in someone rubbing your head.

0:12:460:12:50

-Tell me, because Maggi

-has no idea why you're called Pws.

0:12:500:12:55

-It's an old story.

0:12:550:12:57

-I went to Glan-llyn with the Urdd

-when I was younger.

0:12:570:13:01

-I took Mam's chapel fur coat -

-it was worth a lot of money.

0:13:010:13:07

-That's nice, keep it going.

0:13:070:13:09

-You're making things

-really hard for me.

0:13:100:13:13

-It's soothing, I mean.

0:13:150:13:16

-I ripped it there -

-I wanted to be a hippy at the time.

0:13:190:13:23

-You ripped it?

0:13:230:13:25

-I did and that was that.

-Gareth Mort was a swog in Glan-llyn.

0:13:250:13:30

-He named me Dewi Pws

-and that's who I've been ever since.

0:13:300:13:34

-That's where you were, a fur coat

-and no knickers next to Bala lake.

0:13:340:13:39

-I have sawdust in my throat!

0:13:420:13:45

-Maggi could do with a gin.

0:13:450:13:48

-Thank you, love.

0:13:480:13:50

-.

0:13:510:13:51

-Subtitles

0:13:550:13:55

-Subtitles

-

-Subtitles

0:13:550:13:57

-Thank you.

0:13:580:13:59

-Thank you.

0:14:000:14:01

-With that accent,

-you're not from around here.

0:14:010:14:05

-You don't sound like a Cofi.

0:14:060:14:08

-Treboeth.

0:14:090:14:10

-I come from Swansea.

-We lived in Tresaith.

0:14:100:14:13

-Because of the family,

-we moved up to live in Nefyn.

0:14:140:14:18

-How long?

0:14:180:14:19

-Six inches. No!

0:14:200:14:21

-Two years!

0:14:220:14:23

-Two years!

-

-Six?!

0:14:230:14:25

-He'd be good for nothing for Maggi.

0:14:250:14:29

-Anything less than eight inches

-is just balls!

0:14:290:14:32

-Before we moved up,

-I didn't know where to live.

0:14:350:14:38

-Caernarfon? Anglesey?

0:14:380:14:40

-We had a look around

-and ended up in Nefyn.

0:14:400:14:43

-I walked into the pharmacy -

-I thought they were called chemists.

0:14:430:14:49

-In we went and a young bloke

-was behind the counter.

0:14:490:14:52

-I was about to buy something and I

-was listening to them talk in Welsh.

0:14:530:14:57

-This woman walked in,

-she was about 65.

0:14:580:15:00

-"Do you sell Viagra?"

0:15:000:15:02

-She was up here, she was like you.

0:15:030:15:06

-"Yes. Yes, madam."

0:15:060:15:09

-"Does it work?" "Yes, madam."

0:15:100:15:12

-"Can you get it over the counter?"

-"Only if I take two."

0:15:120:15:15

-Look,

-Maggi goes nowhere without them.

0:15:200:15:23

-What? Goodness me!

0:15:230:15:26

-In pill form?

-I have them as eye drops.

0:15:270:15:31

-They make me look hard!

0:15:310:15:35

-You need Viagra

-in your handbag always.

0:15:380:15:41

-Do you take it?

0:15:410:15:43

-Goodness gracious, no.

0:15:430:15:45

-Some of the boys in Llangefni

-need a hand.

0:15:450:15:48

-When they've been on the beer.

0:15:480:15:51

-There's nothing worse.

-It's called brewer's droop!

0:15:510:15:55

-Tell me, right at the start,

-when you were a young boy...

0:15:550:16:01

-..no knickers, fur coat,

-on the edge of Bala lake...

0:16:020:16:05

-..did you believe you had such a

-bloody colourful life ahead of you?

0:16:050:16:10

-I was a teacher for two years,

-in Splott, in Cardiff.

0:16:100:16:15

-That's the truth.

0:16:150:16:17

-Is that a real place?

-I thought someone had made that up.

0:16:180:16:22

-I didn't like it

-so I became an actor.

0:16:220:16:25

-You'd be great in a panto.

-Have you done one?

0:16:250:16:28

-I'd love to do one.

0:16:280:16:30

-You must have been in a panto if you

-were in a group called Tebot Piws!

0:16:300:16:35

-That sounds completely bonkers.

0:16:350:16:39

-I was in college in Cardiff

-and I'd written some songs.

0:16:390:16:43

-I gave them to a band

-of Northwalians.

0:16:430:16:46

-They were great boys.

0:16:470:16:49

-One day,

-I was giving them some songs...

0:16:490:16:52

-..and telling them how to sing them.

0:16:520:16:54

-In the end they said, "If you're

-so clever, sing them yourself."

0:16:540:16:58

-So I joined the band.

0:16:580:17:00

-There we go - the end of my career!

0:17:000:17:03

-When was that?

0:17:030:17:05

-When was that?

-

-'67.

0:17:050:17:07

-# Mawredd mawr, steddwch i lawr

0:17:070:17:10

-# Ma' rhywun wedi dwyn fy nhrwyn #

0:17:100:17:12

-Where did that come from?

-You did a lot of acting too.

0:17:130:17:17

-Yes.

0:17:170:17:19

-Yes.

-

-I saw you in that film.

0:17:190:17:20

-It was in 1978. Grand Slam.

0:17:200:17:25

-'76 or '77. '76, I think.

0:17:250:17:27

-You filmed it in Paris.

-Were you really there?

0:17:270:17:30

-Yes, and I was in bed

-with Sharon Morgan.

0:17:310:17:34

-Before you ask, no, I didn't.

0:17:340:17:36

-Before you ask, no, I didn't.

-

-Fair play to you.

0:17:360:17:38

-After Grand Slam,

-your mother stopped going to chapel.

0:17:380:17:43

-That's right.

0:17:430:17:45

-That's right.

-

-She was lovely.

0:17:450:17:46

-Mam was a character.

0:17:460:17:49

-I thought the world of her.

0:17:490:17:51

-She had a lovely sense of humour.

0:17:520:17:54

-She watched Grand Slam

-and she was straight on the phone.

0:17:540:17:59

-"Dewi, you've brought shame

-on the family"...

0:17:590:18:02

-..because I was in bed bonking!

0:18:030:18:05

-She was a chapel elder.

0:18:050:18:07

-Mam didn't go to chapel

-for a fortnight.

0:18:070:18:10

-Mr Jeffreys from chapel visited Mam.

0:18:100:18:13

-"What's wrong, Ray?"

-Her name was Rachel.

0:18:130:18:16

-"Oh, our Dewi in that film,

-Grand Slam."

0:18:170:18:20

-She was so ashamed.

0:18:200:18:22

-"That film, Grand Slam."

0:18:220:18:25

-"Mr Jeffreys replied,

-"Wasn't he good?"

0:18:250:18:28

-The following week in chapel, "Did

-you see our Dewi in Grand Slam?"

0:18:290:18:34

-Why did you come...

0:18:350:18:37

-I love this story, Joyce,

-it's hilarious.

0:18:370:18:40

-When you wrote your autobiography...

0:18:400:18:44

-..Theleri Tthwp.

0:18:440:18:46

-Is that genuine?

0:18:470:18:49

-Is it a true story?

0:18:490:18:51

-Yes. Seve Ballesteros.

0:18:510:18:53

-Have you heard this story?

0:18:530:18:55

-You've heard of Seve Ballesteros.

-I was in St Pierre.

0:18:560:18:59

-Huw Llywelyn Davies was sitting

-at the table.

0:18:590:19:03

-He was sitting on four cushions

-to reach the table.

0:19:030:19:07

-He's short!

0:19:070:19:08

-Seve walked in.

0:19:100:19:12

-We were waiting for food

-and I felt this presence.

0:19:120:19:18

-I looked round, Huw was with me.

0:19:180:19:21

-The Spaniard.

0:19:220:19:25

-There was no waitress,

-no-one was serving.

0:19:250:19:28

-"What ith the thoop?" Before I could

-stop myself, I said, "Thelery."

0:19:290:19:33

-And off he went.

-Huw Llywelyn fell off his chair.

0:19:330:19:37

-Seve would have hammered me

-if he knew I was talking the piss.

0:19:370:19:41

-"What ith the thoop?" "Thelery."

0:19:410:19:45

-That's genius.

0:19:450:19:46

-You must be allowed to live

-a creative life.

0:19:470:19:51

-You've influenced so many people.

0:19:520:19:54

-You must look back and say

-to yourself, "That was brilliant".

0:19:540:19:58

-I have enjoyed my life.

-Some things have been like that.

0:19:580:20:02

-It's like everything else.

-Most of the time, it's been good.

0:20:020:20:06

-I'm like you.

-I don't take myself seriously.

0:20:060:20:10

-Or anyone else.

0:20:100:20:11

-Life's too short.

-We're just passing through.

0:20:120:20:15

-Sometimes, there can be

-a lot of cruelty in the world.

0:20:150:20:19

-If you could change something

-or make something better...

0:20:190:20:23

-..by sprinkling glitter over it,

-what would it be?

0:20:230:20:26

-To be honest, I'd love to see

-everyone speaking Welsh in Wales.

0:20:270:20:31

-Wouldn't it be nice? All of

-a sudden, everyone spoke Welsh.

0:20:320:20:36

-There's not enough of us.

0:20:360:20:38

-But we're still here.

0:20:380:20:40

-But we're still here.

-

-Of course we are.

0:20:400:20:42

-We're still here, Joyce.

0:20:420:20:44

-Fair play to you, Dewi.

0:20:450:20:47

-Do you know what, you're a tonic.

0:20:470:20:50

-I like making people laugh.

0:20:500:20:54

-There's nothing better.

0:20:540:20:57

-You've had a massage too.

-Do you want a happy ending now?

0:20:570:21:01

-OK.

0:21:030:21:05

-Joyce, come over here.

0:21:060:21:09

-She doesn't need much encouragement!

0:21:110:21:15

-Thank you.

0:21:190:21:21

-Call again when you have less time!

0:21:220:21:25

-Thank you!

0:21:250:21:27

-Cheerio!

0:21:270:21:29

-Cheerio!

-

-Happy new year.

0:21:290:21:30

-Cheerio.

0:21:300:21:32

-Ta-ra.

0:21:340:21:36

-You'd never say he was 70.

0:21:370:21:40

-He looks good.

0:21:400:21:42

-This year, we made Christmas lunch

-for Lili the cat.

0:21:420:21:46

-Did you make Christmas lunch

-for Gwenno?

0:21:460:21:49

-Of course I did.

0:21:490:21:52

-The pussy likes meat.

0:21:530:21:55

-Did she have turkey?

0:21:550:21:56

-Did she have turkey?

-

-Yes.

0:21:560:21:58

-Do you like turkey?

-It's usually dry.

0:21:580:22:01

-We had a cockerel last year

-and it wasn't...

0:22:010:22:05

-Was it a capon? A cock?

0:22:050:22:10

-Goodness me.

0:22:130:22:14

-Yws Gwynedd walked in

-just as I said cock.

0:22:150:22:18

-Sorry, Yws. What are we like?

0:22:190:22:22

-What were you talking about?

0:22:230:22:25

-What were you talking about?

-

-Joyce's pussy.

0:22:250:22:26

-Joyce's pussy likes meat

-at Christmas time.

0:22:280:22:31

-Sausages wrapped in bacon?

0:22:310:22:34

-It doesn't like bacon.

0:22:340:22:36

-.

0:22:360:22:37

-Subtitles

0:22:400:22:40

-Subtitles

-

-Subtitles

0:22:400:22:42

-How are you? Are you OK?

0:22:430:22:45

-Did you have a good Christmas?

0:22:460:22:48

-Fantastic, yes.

0:22:490:22:50

-Fantastic, yes.

-

-Did Sion Corn visit?

0:22:500:22:52

-Yes, yes, Sion's only just

-started visiting our house again.

0:22:520:22:56

-There are little children there now.

0:22:570:22:59

-Eban is two and a half

-and Berta is five months old.

0:22:590:23:04

-No way.

0:23:040:23:06

-It must be fab with the children

-on Christmas Day.

0:23:070:23:10

-Yes, yes.

0:23:110:23:13

-Eban's quite naughty at the moment,

-the terrible twos.

0:23:130:23:17

-That's not great

-but Christmas trumps everything.

0:23:170:23:21

-Do you know who Yws is, Joyce?

0:23:210:23:23

-Do you know who Yws is, Joyce?

-

-Yes. I've heard it many times.

0:23:230:23:25

-He's famous.

0:23:250:23:27

-He's a YouTube sensation.

0:23:270:23:29

-A Welsh version of it.

0:23:300:23:33

-No, you are.

0:23:330:23:34

-We had fun, we recorded

-a couple of videos for the songs.

0:23:340:23:38

-There aren't enough

-Welsh language videos.

0:23:380:23:42

-We could do one with you.

0:23:420:23:44

-I'm not sure about those drones

-you use. They look dangerous.

0:23:440:23:49

-One of them almost hit you.

0:23:490:23:51

-Where were you, Dyffryn Ardudwy?

0:23:510:23:53

-No, have you been to the Ring

-in Llanfrothen?

0:23:530:23:56

-This isn't a joke. Do you know

-the Ring pub in Llanfrothen?

0:24:010:24:06

-The Ring.

0:24:060:24:07

-You've heard of the ring.

0:24:080:24:10

-Talking of rings, I know

-this is meant to be about you...

0:24:100:24:14

-..but I've got to bring it back

-to Maggi.

0:24:140:24:17

-I had a curry last night with my

-new lover, goodness me, it was hot.

0:24:170:24:21

-I had to put the Wet Wipes

-in the fridge.

0:24:210:24:23

-The curry or the lover?

0:24:230:24:25

-The curry or the lover?

-

-Both.

0:24:250:24:27

-My ring was like the Japanese flag.

0:24:270:24:29

-Straight up. It was terrible.

0:24:300:24:32

-Anyway, back to Yws now.

-That's enough about Maggi.

0:24:320:24:36

-So tell me, how does it feel?

0:24:360:24:40

-In truth, that song, Sebona Fi...

0:24:410:24:45

-..that's an anthem.

0:24:450:24:47

-It's more than that.

0:24:470:24:49

-It's so good.

0:24:500:24:51

-You're good too.

0:24:510:24:53

-You can tell me if this is a lie...

0:24:540:24:57

-..but I've heard that you go away

-to a retreat to write your songs.

0:24:570:25:05

-You come back with a whole album.

0:25:050:25:07

-I go away to Mid Wales,

-you can do a lot in Mid Wales.

0:25:080:25:12

-You won't even find a Tesco there.

0:25:140:25:16

-There is a place

-called Stiwdio Bing.

0:25:170:25:20

-I locked myself away

-for a few weekends...

0:25:200:25:23

-..and came back with an album.

0:25:240:25:26

-You write all these songs yourself?

0:25:270:25:29

-You write all these songs yourself?

-

-The band wrote the last album.

0:25:290:25:31

-I wrote Sebona Fi...

0:25:310:25:33

-..but Rich, the drummer,

-he's also the producer.

0:25:330:25:37

-A lot of the work is down to Rich,

-he's a genius.

0:25:370:25:41

-He's a musical genius.

0:25:410:25:43

-Tell me, when you're standing there,

-you should have seen him, Joyce...

0:25:430:25:49

-..in the Eisteddfod...

0:25:490:25:51

-..not just in Maes B but in

-the pavilion in the Eisteddfod gig.

0:25:520:25:56

-There were thousands

-of people there.

0:25:560:25:59

-The pavilion gig was fantastic.

0:25:590:26:02

-There were so many different ages

-in the crowd.

0:26:020:26:05

-In Maes B, it's mostly youngsters.

0:26:060:26:08

-There were thousands there.

0:26:090:26:11

-We broke a record in Maes B.

0:26:110:26:13

-It was the biggest crowd

-ever to attend Maes B.

0:26:130:26:16

-It's been going for 20 years.

0:26:160:26:18

-Thanks to Anglesey, Maggi.

0:26:180:26:20

-Thanks to Anglesey, Maggi.

-

-Goodness me, yes.

0:26:200:26:23

-It was a noisy night.

-My farm's not that far away.

0:26:230:26:27

-The seats were damp in the pavilion!

0:26:280:26:31

-Those girls had a great time.

0:26:310:26:35

-Fair play,

-you're sexy and that helps.

0:26:350:26:38

-Do you know what I mean?

0:26:380:26:40

-He's brave too. His mother

-always used to cut his hair.

0:26:400:26:45

-That's true.

0:26:450:26:47

-No-one else, no-one professional,

-cut my hair until I was 25.

0:26:470:26:53

-Was that her job?

0:26:530:26:55

-Was that her job?

-

-I hope that's what she did.

0:26:550:26:58

-She was a mobile hairdresser, she

-did a lot of blue rinses at home.

0:26:590:27:03

-The smell of ammonia

-in our house was horrible.

0:27:030:27:06

-Mam had conned me though.

0:27:080:27:10

-She said that no-one

-could touch curly hair but her.

0:27:100:27:15

-She said someone else would want

-to straighten out your hair.

0:27:150:27:21

-When I was 21, only 21...

0:27:210:27:24

-..I went to see Gav next door

-and he shaved it all off...

0:27:240:27:28

-..and gave me a Mohican!

0:27:280:27:30

-Tell me, because I want to know

-these things...

0:27:320:27:34

-..they won't ask you this on Heno...

0:27:350:27:37

-..with this lovely hair you have...

0:27:370:27:40

-..do the curtains match the carpet?

0:27:400:27:43

-That's what everyone wants to know!

0:27:440:27:46

-What would you say

-is my hair colour?

0:27:460:27:49

-Ginger.

0:27:490:27:50

-Ginger.

-

-It's more ginger everywhere else!

0:27:500:27:53

-On my face, for example.

0:27:530:27:54

-Nothing matches with me.

0:27:550:27:58

-Goodness me, no.

0:27:580:28:00

-I've pulled the carpet up -

-there's laminate floor there now!

0:28:000:28:04

-Joyce tried to tell me

-that she shaves but she doesn't.

0:28:040:28:10

-Grass doesn't grow on a busy road!

0:28:100:28:13

-Isn't that right, Joyce?

0:28:150:28:18

-Goodness me.

0:28:180:28:20

-These songs,

-where do they come from?

0:28:210:28:24

-I don't know.

0:28:240:28:26

-What's the process - what comes

-first? The music or the lyrics?

0:28:260:28:31

-It's the music with me.

0:28:320:28:34

-I have a short span of attention.

0:28:340:28:38

-If it's not something

-that's memorable right away...

0:28:380:28:41

-..I won't carry on playing it.

0:28:410:28:43

-What's that?

0:28:450:28:47

-What's that?

-

-The taste of the grapes.

0:28:470:28:48

-It's strong in the wine.

0:28:490:28:50

-He was meant to be impressed

-with that!

0:28:510:28:53

-Take that song now...

0:28:530:28:56

-..goodness me,

-it's an optimistic song.

0:28:560:29:00

-That must come from the fact

-that you like such a creative life.

0:29:000:29:06

-Does it come from that?

0:29:060:29:08

-It's entirely intentional.

0:29:090:29:10

-There are enough boring

-and sad things in the world.

0:29:100:29:13

-We're brilliant in Wales

-at being boring and sad.

0:29:140:29:17

-We're awesome at it.

0:29:170:29:19

-We write songs that make you

-start drinking whiskey.

0:29:200:29:24

-There's a shortage.

0:29:250:29:27

-It's a song that lifts your spirits.

0:29:280:29:30

-With gigs, too, when you do a gig...

0:29:310:29:33

-..there's nothing worse than

-a slow song where no-one dances.

0:29:330:29:39

-It's nice when people listen...

0:29:390:29:42

-..but I like to watch people

-enjoying themselves.

0:29:420:29:46

-You feed off them.

0:29:460:29:48

-When did your interest in music

-begin, how old were you?

0:29:480:29:51

-I was 13 when I learnt

-to play the guitar.

0:29:520:29:55

-I enjoyed music but I didn't think

-I'd ever write songs.

0:29:550:29:59

-I didn't go out

-for the entire summer.

0:29:590:30:02

-The lads would knock the door

-on their way to playing football.

0:30:020:30:06

-I'd say, "No, I've learnt C."

0:30:060:30:09

-You're a good footballer too.

-Do you still play?.

0:30:090:30:13

-My hips have gone, Maggi!

0:30:130:30:15

-Really? 35.

0:30:150:30:17

-34!

0:30:180:30:19

-I was only a year out!

0:30:200:30:22

-To follow a creative life

-like that...

0:30:220:30:27

-..and having something come out

-of it, that's fabulous.

0:30:270:30:31

-Someone in my family once said...

0:30:310:30:34

-..once you find something

-that you love...

0:30:340:30:37

-..you'll never work again.

0:30:370:30:39

-That's a good way to put it.

0:30:390:30:41

-You've seen a lot

-throughout your musical career.

0:30:420:30:46

-You've visited all kinds

-of different places to perform.

0:30:460:30:50

-How would you like to see the world

-through my perfect eyes?

0:30:510:30:56

-You're on a roll now!

0:30:560:30:59

-The gin's gone to your brain!

0:30:590:31:02

-I like that song.

0:31:020:31:05

-Do you want to hear something cute?

-That's about my son.

0:31:050:31:09

-Many think it's a love song.

0:31:100:31:12

-It's not.

0:31:130:31:15

-We were in Cardiff one Christmas.

0:31:150:31:19

-Ebs looked up and said,

-"Look at the star".

0:31:200:31:23

-It was in the middle of the day.

0:31:230:31:25

-I said,

-"No, there's no star in the sky."

0:31:250:31:28

-He was about 18 months old.

0:31:280:31:30

-I looked up and they were putting

-the Christmas decorations up.

0:31:310:31:35

-There's was a beautiful star

-in the sky.

0:31:350:31:38

-He sees so much -

-he's opened our eyes to the world.

0:31:380:31:42

-It's so nice to write a song

-about your son.

0:31:420:31:46

-Cute.

0:31:460:31:48

-Where did your stupid name

-come from?

0:31:490:31:52

-What the hell does it men? Yws!

0:31:520:31:54

-I thought it was Ywain,

-an abbreviation of Ywain.

0:31:550:31:59

-Where does it come from?

0:31:590:32:01

-It's a shortened version of Ywain.

0:32:020:32:04

-It's a shortened version of Ywain.

-

-Your real name is Ywain.

0:32:040:32:06

-Mam and Dad named me

-after a Tecwyn Ifan song.

0:32:060:32:09

-Well, not after his song.

0:32:090:32:11

-Tecwyn Ifan sang a song about

-a Prince of Wales at one time...

0:32:120:32:16

-..in the... well, a long time ago,

-about 500 years ago.

0:32:170:32:20

-His name was Ywain Gwynedd.

0:32:210:32:22

-He's not as famous

-as Owain Glyndwr...

0:32:230:32:25

-..but he drove the English

-out of Wales three times.

0:32:250:32:29

-He was a Welsh prince.

-You're Ywain with a Y, not O.

0:32:290:32:33

-Mam said it was the old way

-of spelling the name.

0:32:330:32:39

-Having said that,

-Owain means O'r Waun...

0:32:390:32:43

-..from the womb,

-from the vagina, really.

0:32:440:32:48

-Goodness me.

0:32:480:32:50

-Ywain means...

0:32:500:32:52

-..the...

0:32:530:32:55

-The vagina!

0:32:550:32:57

-You're a fanny!

0:32:570:32:59

-Nain calls them beef curtains.

0:33:000:33:04

-You've won plenty of awards.

0:33:080:33:10

-I've been lucky enough...

0:33:110:33:12

-You have hair hanging off

-your eyebrows.

0:33:130:33:15

-That's happened to you before!

0:33:160:33:17

-With your lovely songs...

0:33:230:33:25

-..and I like the fact that Sebona Fi

-is so optimistic and lively...

0:33:250:33:30

-..and lifts someone' spirits...

0:33:300:33:32

-..in such a shit world...

0:33:330:33:35

-..if you could throw glitter

-over one thing in this world...

0:33:350:33:39

-..to make it better,

-what would it be?

0:33:400:33:42

-You could throw glitter

-over so many things.

0:33:430:33:46

-I don't want to become

-too political...

0:33:460:33:49

-..but my version of glitter...

0:33:490:33:51

-..my aim in life is to have

-as much fun as possible...

0:33:510:33:54

-..as long as you don't stop

-someone else's fun.

0:33:550:33:58

-If everyone lived their life

-like that, we'd all be OK.

0:33:580:34:02

-That's my glitter.

0:34:020:34:04

-Wise words indeed.

0:34:050:34:07

-Glitter all over.

0:34:070:34:09

-Yws Gwynedd's wise words.

0:34:100:34:12

-Fair play to you, Yws,

-you're a shining star.

0:34:120:34:16

-You've lit up our lives

-this Christmas.

0:34:160:34:19

-Would you do Mags

-one little favour before you go?

0:34:200:34:24

-Would you sing Sebona Fi?

0:34:240:34:27

-# Because we're all running around

-like rats

0:34:280:34:33

-# If you have half an hour,

-humour me

0:34:330:34:38

-# And remember those old things

-that worry everyone

0:34:380:34:41

-# But we're all dirt in the end

0:34:420:34:46

-# Oh, life is so fine

0:34:460:34:49

-# The taste of grapes in the wine

-is strong and the company's good

0:34:490:34:54

-# Oh, life is so fine

0:34:550:34:58

-# The taste of grapes in the wine

-is strong and the company's good

0:34:590:35:03

-Remember, my little chicks, however

-horrible your day has been...

0:35:090:35:15

-..throw some glitter over it

-and everything will be OK.

0:35:150:35:19

-# Oh, life is so fine

0:35:220:35:24

-# Oh, life is so fine

0:35:310:35:34

-# The taste of grapes in the wine

-is strong and the company's good

0:35:340:35:39

-# Oh, life is so fine

0:35:410:35:43

-# The taste of grapes in the wine

-is strong and the company's good #

0:35:450:35:50

-S4C Subtitles by Adnod Cyf.

0:35:510:35:53

-.

0:35:530:35:53

Eleri Siôn, Yws Gwynedd a Dewi Pws sy'n cadw cwmni i Maggi Noggi a Joyce mewn rhifyn arbennig. Secrets galore as Eleri Siôn, Yws Gwynedd & Dewi Pws join Maggi Noggi and Joyce in the salon.