Salon Maggi Noggi Y Salon


Salon Maggi Noggi

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Transcript


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-Hoh-hoh-hoh.

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-Rejoice for Joyce, my little lovely.

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-That rhymes!

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-Jesus Christ, I deserved a programme

-just for myself.

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-What's that on your head, Joyce? Did

-an elf crash land on your brains?

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-I've come from outer space!

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-Nice Christmas? Was it OK?

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-Sion Corn came.

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-How's Gwenno? The old pussy

-must be frozen in this cold weather.

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-She doesn't go out. She just

-goes out to do what she needs to do.

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-It's a terrible thing...

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-..when your pussy's scratching

-the back door wanting to get out.

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-That sounds like New Year's Eve

-in Llanfair Mathafarn Eithaf.

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-What are you like?

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-Did you have a night out

-in Llanfair Mathafarn Eithaf?

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-It was cold.

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-My nipples were like hat pegs

-in a chapel.

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-Hiya, how are you?

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-Dear me.

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-Are you alright there, love?

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-Yeah, yeah.

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-Where are you from?

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-Where are you from?

-

-Barry. Well, yeah. Now, yeah.

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-Ba... Down in the south?

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-Yes. Are you Welsh?

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-Yes, I'm Welsh.

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-Lucky I didn't say

-anything about her in Welsh.

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-Where are you from?

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-Where are you from?

-

-Aberaeron originally. Just outside.

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-I'm Maggi.

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-How are you? Are you alright?

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-It's nice to meet you.

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-This is Joyce.

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-Hiya, Joyce, are you OK?

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-Hiya, Joyce, are you OK?

-

-She doesn't say much.

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-She's just a decoration

-in the corner.

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-I recognise your face.

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-Do you recognise her, Joyce?

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-Do you recognise her, Joyce?

-

-I know who she is.

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-You don't.

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-Oh, my God. I know who you are.

-You're Eleri Sion.

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-You're on Radio Wales.

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-In English. Every day.

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-You were on, oh, I loved it...

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-I'm so happy now.

-I've come over all funny.

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-You've lost your head.

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-You've lost your head with

-those sticking out of your brains.

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-The other week, you had Bananarama.

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-Oh, my gosh, yes.

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-They've reformed

-and they're performing everywhere.

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-They look good. They must

-have had some tips from Joyce.

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-I think so.

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-How old is Joyce? How old are you?

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-How old is Joyce? How old are you?

-

-I'm not going to tell you.

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-Eighty-one.

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-Joyce, have you had any work done?

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-No, it's embalming fluid.

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-Oh, my gosh.

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-No, Eleri!

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-Have you heard this - the best thing

-for skin in the morning...

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-..is if you wee in a jar...

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-..and then dab a flannel in it

-and wash your face.

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-No. You don't say.

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-I'm not trying that. Have you?

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-I'm not trying that. Have you?

-

-No, never.

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-Has no-one pissed on your head?

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-I bet you someone has in Felinheli.

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-Anyway, and another thing

-since you're a celeb, Preparation H.

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-Preparation H?

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-Preparation H?

-

-For haemorrhoids.

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-Under here? Does it work?

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-Look!

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-I'm living proof.

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-I said to myself, if they can shrink

-grapes hanging from your backside...

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-..think what they could

-do to your face.

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-So anyway, tell me, Eleri...

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-..this one is multi-talented, Joyce.

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-She's a correspondent...

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-Do you know

-what correspondent means, Cara?

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-You specialised in sport.

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-You specialised in sport.

-

-That's what I used to do.

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-That must be strange, working in

-the middle of a butch man's world.

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-What do you like?

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-What do you like?

-

-Rugby. Nigel Owens.

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-Nigel ticks your boxes.

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-Or something bald,

-like Gareth Thomas.

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-You like Gareth?

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-Yes. You named your son after him.

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-Well, no. After Dad.

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-His name's Alffi.

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-Rob Jones is a former rugby player.

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-He asked, "What have you called

-him?" I replied, "Alffi George".

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-"Oh, my gosh, you've named him

-after Alfie and George Michael.

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-"What's wrong with you?"

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-That's camper than Christmas.

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-That must have inspired you

-to get married...

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-..to a footballer.

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-He proposed three times.

-I turned him down twice.

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-Was he romantic?

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-Was he romantic?

-

-The first time he proposed...

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-..he'd written it down.

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-Not him. He asked Dad how to write

-"will you marry me" in Welsh.

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-Love him.

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-Love him.

-

-Dad had some Rizlas.

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-He took out his Rizla packet...

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-..and wrote it down for him

-but not phonetically.

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-He's not Welsh?

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-He doesn't speak Welsh.

-He comes from the Wrexham area.

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-He sat in front of me and said,

-"I've got something to tell you.

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-"I've got something to ask you."

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-I said, "Listen, if you're not

-actually going to learn...

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-"..how to say it properly,

-I'm not saying yes."

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-On your bike!

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-I've never been one for marriage.

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-Is there no-one special

-in your life?

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-What's the point in buying a book

-when you can visit the library?

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-That reminds me. I went

-to the Eisteddfod this year.

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-You used to compete

-in the eisteddfod.

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-You'd sing.

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-Did you sing solo

-or sing in a group?

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-I sang solo and I sang in duets.

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-Did you use your experience

-to empathise...

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-..with those poor souls

-on the Waw Ffactor?

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-Do you know what - all of those on

-that series, and we filmed three...

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-..all of them could sing.

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-They were good.

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-Duffy came second.

-Can you believe that?

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-Duffy came second, then went on

-to make millions and win a Grammy.

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-Who? Granny?

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-No, a Grammy, you silly cow.

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-She can't hear

-through those curlers.

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-That elf! Look at the state of her.

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-Tell me now...

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-..what was the first thing

-you ever did?

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-Cracabant.

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-I only fuckin' asked!

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-What did you say?

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-Cracabant.

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-Cracabant.

-

-I thought she'd sworn at me!

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-It was a programme.

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-Tell me about

-your Christmas traditions.

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-I was home this year

-and it was lovely.

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-We went skiing last year.

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-My husband works away.

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-Where does he work?

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-Where does he work?

-

-With Aston Villa Football Club.

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-No! Really? They're a celeb family.

-Goodness me.

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-No, not really.

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-Does he still have

-a footballer's body?

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-Six foot five. I know.

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-Don't bring him anywhere near Maggi.

-Is he in proportion?

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-Oh, Eleri.

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-No wonder you're smiling.

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-If you had a crystal ball...

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-..could you have foreseen

-this fabulous future...

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-..with the lovely husband, your son

-and the Christmas traditions...

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-..and the radio show

-in your poshest English?

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-It's bilingual sometimes.

-I still struggle.

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-It sounds as if you've swallowed

-a thesaurus.

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-Really. I was listening to you

-with Bananarama.

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-That's the only one you've heard.

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-It's on replay.

-It takes me back to the '80s.

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-Back in the '80s,

-I was in love with Paul Young.

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-I interviewed Paul Young.

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-You didn't? It's easy enough

-to go off someone, Joyce.

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-This one's met them all.

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-I was so excited...

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-..and I said, "I've been waiting

-for this moment since I was 15.

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-"I came to see you in the NEC

-in Birmingham.

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-"I thought one day I'd meet you and

-I can't believe the day has come."

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-He was in London

-and I was in Cardiff.

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-He said, "I can see a picture

-of you in front of me.

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-"Your blonde hair and blue eyes."

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-I said, "Yeah, that's me."

-And I said, "Would you?"

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-Really?

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-"Only joking! Don't answer it!

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-"If it's not yes, don't answer it."

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-Fair play to you, Eleri.

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-Tell me, Eleri, sometimes

-the world can be a cruel place.

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-It's in need of some colour.

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-If you could throw some glitter

-over something to make it better...

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-..what would it be?

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-My bingo wings.

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-You don't have bingo wings.

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-You don't have bingo wings.

-

-I hate my bingo wings.

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-I'm like a Boeing 787.

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-What a sight.

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-How's that? Is that OK?

0:10:410:10:42

-Brilliant. You're a miracle worker.

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-That's true.

0:10:460:10:47

-That's true.

-

-Thank you.

0:10:470:10:49

-I really appreciate it.

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-Thank you.

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-Nice to see you, nice to meet you.

-Happy new year.

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-Look after yourself.

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-And you. Ta-ra.

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-Ta-ra, Eleri. Take care.

0:11:030:11:06

-What a lovely girl.

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-Does Wil the seagull

-still come over?

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-Every day, all day.

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-No matter how much food

-I give her, she stays there.

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-She?

0:11:220:11:23

-She?

-

-Wilhelmina. She's had a baby.

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-Don't talk nonsense.

0:11:260:11:27

-Don't talk nonsense.

-

-She brings the baby to feed it.

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-How many has she had?

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-How many has she had?

-

-She lays the eggs on my roof.

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-A fleet of them come down.

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-You'll be like Janet

-from Hitchcock's The Birds.

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-Don't!

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-Hello.

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-Hello. Hello, Joyce.

-I heard you were here.

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-Dewi, how are you?

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-Dewi, how are you?

-

-How are you?

0:11:500:11:52

-How's Rhiannon?

0:11:520:11:54

-How's Rhiannon?

-

-Better than nothing.

0:11:540:11:56

-Don't talk like that about my niece,

-please.

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-We're related.

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-I was about to ask

-if you knew each other.

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-We've slept together a lot,

-in different beds!

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-Goodness me.

0:12:130:12:14

-What are you going to do with that?

0:12:140:12:18

-What happened to your head?

0:12:200:12:23

-Do you know Emyr Wyn,

-the actor on Pobol y Cwm?

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-We went into a pub in Cardiff, it

-fell silent and the barman said...

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-.."If you put your heads together,

-you'd make an arse of yourselves."

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-I remember that.

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-Head massage then.

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-You like one of those, don't you?

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-There's something lovely

-in someone rubbing your head.

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-Tell me, because Maggi

-has no idea why you're called Pws.

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-It's an old story.

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-I went to Glan-llyn with the Urdd

-when I was younger.

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-I took Mam's chapel fur coat -

-it was worth a lot of money.

0:13:010:13:07

-That's nice, keep it going.

0:13:070:13:09

-You're making things

-really hard for me.

0:13:100:13:13

-It's soothing, I mean.

0:13:150:13:16

-I ripped it there -

-I wanted to be a hippy at the time.

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-You ripped it?

0:13:230:13:25

-I did and that was that.

-Gareth Mort was a swog in Glan-llyn.

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-He named me Dewi Pws

-and that's who I've been ever since.

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-That's where you were, a fur coat

-and no knickers next to Bala lake.

0:13:340:13:39

-I have sawdust in my throat!

0:13:420:13:45

-Maggi could do with a gin.

0:13:450:13:48

-Thank you, love.

0:13:480:13:50

-.

0:13:510:13:51

-Subtitles

0:13:550:13:55

-Subtitles

-

-Subtitles

0:13:550:13:57

-Thank you.

0:13:580:13:59

-Thank you.

0:14:000:14:01

-With that accent,

-you're not from around here.

0:14:010:14:05

-You don't sound like a Cofi.

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-Treboeth.

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-I come from Swansea.

-We lived in Tresaith.

0:14:100:14:13

-Because of the family,

-we moved up to live in Nefyn.

0:14:140:14:18

-How long?

0:14:180:14:19

-Six inches. No!

0:14:200:14:21

-Two years!

0:14:220:14:23

-Two years!

-

-Six?!

0:14:230:14:25

-He'd be good for nothing for Maggi.

0:14:250:14:29

-Anything less than eight inches

-is just balls!

0:14:290:14:32

-Before we moved up,

-I didn't know where to live.

0:14:350:14:38

-Caernarfon? Anglesey?

0:14:380:14:40

-We had a look around

-and ended up in Nefyn.

0:14:400:14:43

-I walked into the pharmacy -

-I thought they were called chemists.

0:14:430:14:49

-In we went and a young bloke

-was behind the counter.

0:14:490:14:52

-I was about to buy something and I

-was listening to them talk in Welsh.

0:14:530:14:57

-This woman walked in,

-she was about 65.

0:14:580:15:00

-"Do you sell Viagra?"

0:15:000:15:02

-She was up here, she was like you.

0:15:030:15:06

-"Yes. Yes, madam."

0:15:060:15:09

-"Does it work?" "Yes, madam."

0:15:100:15:12

-"Can you get it over the counter?"

-"Only if I take two."

0:15:120:15:15

-Look,

-Maggi goes nowhere without them.

0:15:200:15:23

-What? Goodness me!

0:15:230:15:26

-In pill form?

-I have them as eye drops.

0:15:270:15:31

-They make me look hard!

0:15:310:15:35

-You need Viagra

-in your handbag always.

0:15:380:15:41

-Do you take it?

0:15:410:15:43

-Goodness gracious, no.

0:15:430:15:45

-Some of the boys in Llangefni

-need a hand.

0:15:450:15:48

-When they've been on the beer.

0:15:480:15:51

-There's nothing worse.

-It's called brewer's droop!

0:15:510:15:55

-Tell me, right at the start,

-when you were a young boy...

0:15:550:16:01

-..no knickers, fur coat,

-on the edge of Bala lake...

0:16:020:16:05

-..did you believe you had such a

-bloody colourful life ahead of you?

0:16:050:16:10

-I was a teacher for two years,

-in Splott, in Cardiff.

0:16:100:16:15

-That's the truth.

0:16:150:16:17

-Is that a real place?

-I thought someone had made that up.

0:16:180:16:22

-I didn't like it

-so I became an actor.

0:16:220:16:25

-You'd be great in a panto.

-Have you done one?

0:16:250:16:28

-I'd love to do one.

0:16:280:16:30

-You must have been in a panto if you

-were in a group called Tebot Piws!

0:16:300:16:35

-That sounds completely bonkers.

0:16:350:16:39

-I was in college in Cardiff

-and I'd written some songs.

0:16:390:16:43

-I gave them to a band

-of Northwalians.

0:16:430:16:46

-They were great boys.

0:16:470:16:49

-One day,

-I was giving them some songs...

0:16:490:16:52

-..and telling them how to sing them.

0:16:520:16:54

-In the end they said, "If you're

-so clever, sing them yourself."

0:16:540:16:58

-So I joined the band.

0:16:580:17:00

-There we go - the end of my career!

0:17:000:17:03

-When was that?

0:17:030:17:05

-When was that?

-

-'67.

0:17:050:17:07

-# Mawredd mawr, steddwch i lawr

0:17:070:17:10

-# Ma' rhywun wedi dwyn fy nhrwyn #

0:17:100:17:12

-Where did that come from?

-You did a lot of acting too.

0:17:130:17:17

-Yes.

0:17:170:17:19

-Yes.

-

-I saw you in that film.

0:17:190:17:20

-It was in 1978. Grand Slam.

0:17:200:17:25

-'76 or '77. '76, I think.

0:17:250:17:27

-You filmed it in Paris.

-Were you really there?

0:17:270:17:30

-Yes, and I was in bed

-with Sharon Morgan.

0:17:310:17:34

-Before you ask, no, I didn't.

0:17:340:17:36

-Before you ask, no, I didn't.

-

-Fair play to you.

0:17:360:17:38

-After Grand Slam,

-your mother stopped going to chapel.

0:17:380:17:43

-That's right.

0:17:430:17:45

-That's right.

-

-She was lovely.

0:17:450:17:46

-Mam was a character.

0:17:460:17:49

-I thought the world of her.

0:17:490:17:51

-She had a lovely sense of humour.

0:17:520:17:54

-She watched Grand Slam

-and she was straight on the phone.

0:17:540:17:59

-"Dewi, you've brought shame

-on the family"...

0:17:590:18:02

-..because I was in bed bonking!

0:18:030:18:05

-She was a chapel elder.

0:18:050:18:07

-Mam didn't go to chapel

-for a fortnight.

0:18:070:18:10

-Mr Jeffreys from chapel visited Mam.

0:18:100:18:13

-"What's wrong, Ray?"

-Her name was Rachel.

0:18:130:18:16

-"Oh, our Dewi in that film,

-Grand Slam."

0:18:170:18:20

-She was so ashamed.

0:18:200:18:22

-"That film, Grand Slam."

0:18:220:18:25

-"Mr Jeffreys replied,

-"Wasn't he good?"

0:18:250:18:28

-The following week in chapel, "Did

-you see our Dewi in Grand Slam?"

0:18:290:18:34

-Why did you come...

0:18:350:18:37

-I love this story, Joyce,

-it's hilarious.

0:18:370:18:40

-When you wrote your autobiography...

0:18:400:18:44

-..Theleri Tthwp.

0:18:440:18:46

-Is that genuine?

0:18:470:18:49

-Is it a true story?

0:18:490:18:51

-Yes. Seve Ballesteros.

0:18:510:18:53

-Have you heard this story?

0:18:530:18:55

-You've heard of Seve Ballesteros.

-I was in St Pierre.

0:18:560:18:59

-Huw Llywelyn Davies was sitting

-at the table.

0:18:590:19:03

-He was sitting on four cushions

-to reach the table.

0:19:030:19:07

-He's short!

0:19:070:19:08

-Seve walked in.

0:19:100:19:12

-We were waiting for food

-and I felt this presence.

0:19:120:19:18

-I looked round, Huw was with me.

0:19:180:19:21

-The Spaniard.

0:19:220:19:25

-There was no waitress,

-no-one was serving.

0:19:250:19:28

-"What ith the thoop?" Before I could

-stop myself, I said, "Thelery."

0:19:290:19:33

-And off he went.

-Huw Llywelyn fell off his chair.

0:19:330:19:37

-Seve would have hammered me

-if he knew I was talking the piss.

0:19:370:19:41

-"What ith the thoop?" "Thelery."

0:19:410:19:45

-That's genius.

0:19:450:19:46

-You must be allowed to live

-a creative life.

0:19:470:19:51

-You've influenced so many people.

0:19:520:19:54

-You must look back and say

-to yourself, "That was brilliant".

0:19:540:19:58

-I have enjoyed my life.

-Some things have been like that.

0:19:580:20:02

-It's like everything else.

-Most of the time, it's been good.

0:20:020:20:06

-I'm like you.

-I don't take myself seriously.

0:20:060:20:10

-Or anyone else.

0:20:100:20:11

-Life's too short.

-We're just passing through.

0:20:120:20:15

-Sometimes, there can be

-a lot of cruelty in the world.

0:20:150:20:19

-If you could change something

-or make something better...

0:20:190:20:23

-..by sprinkling glitter over it,

-what would it be?

0:20:230:20:26

-To be honest, I'd love to see

-everyone speaking Welsh in Wales.

0:20:270:20:31

-Wouldn't it be nice? All of

-a sudden, everyone spoke Welsh.

0:20:320:20:36

-There's not enough of us.

0:20:360:20:38

-But we're still here.

0:20:380:20:40

-But we're still here.

-

-Of course we are.

0:20:400:20:42

-We're still here, Joyce.

0:20:420:20:44

-Fair play to you, Dewi.

0:20:450:20:47

-Do you know what, you're a tonic.

0:20:470:20:50

-I like making people laugh.

0:20:500:20:54

-There's nothing better.

0:20:540:20:57

-You've had a massage too.

-Do you want a happy ending now?

0:20:570:21:01

-OK.

0:21:030:21:05

-Joyce, come over here.

0:21:060:21:09

-She doesn't need much encouragement!

0:21:110:21:15

-Thank you.

0:21:190:21:21

-Call again when you have less time!

0:21:220:21:25

-Thank you!

0:21:250:21:27

-Cheerio!

0:21:270:21:29

-Cheerio!

-

-Happy new year.

0:21:290:21:30

-Cheerio.

0:21:300:21:32

-Ta-ra.

0:21:340:21:36

-You'd never say he was 70.

0:21:370:21:40

-He looks good.

0:21:400:21:42

-This year, we made Christmas lunch

-for Lili the cat.

0:21:420:21:46

-Did you make Christmas lunch

-for Gwenno?

0:21:460:21:49

-Of course I did.

0:21:490:21:52

-The pussy likes meat.

0:21:530:21:55

-Did she have turkey?

0:21:550:21:56

-Did she have turkey?

-

-Yes.

0:21:560:21:58

-Do you like turkey?

-It's usually dry.

0:21:580:22:01

-We had a cockerel last year

-and it wasn't...

0:22:010:22:05

-Was it a capon? A cock?

0:22:050:22:10

-Goodness me.

0:22:130:22:14

-Yws Gwynedd walked in

-just as I said cock.

0:22:150:22:18

-Sorry, Yws. What are we like?

0:22:190:22:22

-What were you talking about?

0:22:230:22:25

-What were you talking about?

-

-Joyce's pussy.

0:22:250:22:26

-Joyce's pussy likes meat

-at Christmas time.

0:22:280:22:31

-Sausages wrapped in bacon?

0:22:310:22:34

-It doesn't like bacon.

0:22:340:22:36

-.

0:22:360:22:37

-Subtitles

0:22:400:22:40

-Subtitles

-

-Subtitles

0:22:400:22:42

-How are you? Are you OK?

0:22:430:22:45

-Did you have a good Christmas?

0:22:460:22:48

-Fantastic, yes.

0:22:490:22:50

-Fantastic, yes.

-

-Did Sion Corn visit?

0:22:500:22:52

-Yes, yes, Sion's only just

-started visiting our house again.

0:22:520:22:56

-There are little children there now.

0:22:570:22:59

-Eban is two and a half

-and Berta is five months old.

0:22:590:23:04

-No way.

0:23:040:23:06

-It must be fab with the children

-on Christmas Day.

0:23:070:23:10

-Yes, yes.

0:23:110:23:13

-Eban's quite naughty at the moment,

-the terrible twos.

0:23:130:23:17

-That's not great

-but Christmas trumps everything.

0:23:170:23:21

-Do you know who Yws is, Joyce?

0:23:210:23:23

-Do you know who Yws is, Joyce?

-

-Yes. I've heard it many times.

0:23:230:23:25

-He's famous.

0:23:250:23:27

-He's a YouTube sensation.

0:23:270:23:29

-A Welsh version of it.

0:23:300:23:33

-No, you are.

0:23:330:23:34

-We had fun, we recorded

-a couple of videos for the songs.

0:23:340:23:38

-There aren't enough

-Welsh language videos.

0:23:380:23:42

-We could do one with you.

0:23:420:23:44

-I'm not sure about those drones

-you use. They look dangerous.

0:23:440:23:49

-One of them almost hit you.

0:23:490:23:51

-Where were you, Dyffryn Ardudwy?

0:23:510:23:53

-No, have you been to the Ring

-in Llanfrothen?

0:23:530:23:56

-This isn't a joke. Do you know

-the Ring pub in Llanfrothen?

0:24:010:24:06

-The Ring.

0:24:060:24:07

-You've heard of the ring.

0:24:080:24:10

-Talking of rings, I know

-this is meant to be about you...

0:24:100:24:14

-..but I've got to bring it back

-to Maggi.

0:24:140:24:17

-I had a curry last night with my

-new lover, goodness me, it was hot.

0:24:170:24:21

-I had to put the Wet Wipes

-in the fridge.

0:24:210:24:23

-The curry or the lover?

0:24:230:24:25

-The curry or the lover?

-

-Both.

0:24:250:24:27

-My ring was like the Japanese flag.

0:24:270:24:29

-Straight up. It was terrible.

0:24:300:24:32

-Anyway, back to Yws now.

-That's enough about Maggi.

0:24:320:24:36

-So tell me, how does it feel?

0:24:360:24:40

-In truth, that song, Sebona Fi...

0:24:410:24:45

-..that's an anthem.

0:24:450:24:47

-It's more than that.

0:24:470:24:49

-It's so good.

0:24:500:24:51

-You're good too.

0:24:510:24:53

-You can tell me if this is a lie...

0:24:540:24:57

-..but I've heard that you go away

-to a retreat to write your songs.

0:24:570:25:05

-You come back with a whole album.

0:25:050:25:07

-I go away to Mid Wales,

-you can do a lot in Mid Wales.

0:25:080:25:12

-You won't even find a Tesco there.

0:25:140:25:16

-There is a place

-called Stiwdio Bing.

0:25:170:25:20

-I locked myself away

-for a few weekends...

0:25:200:25:23

-..and came back with an album.

0:25:240:25:26

-You write all these songs yourself?

0:25:270:25:29

-You write all these songs yourself?

-

-The band wrote the last album.

0:25:290:25:31

-I wrote Sebona Fi...

0:25:310:25:33

-..but Rich, the drummer,

-he's also the producer.

0:25:330:25:37

-A lot of the work is down to Rich,

-he's a genius.

0:25:370:25:41

-He's a musical genius.

0:25:410:25:43

-Tell me, when you're standing there,

-you should have seen him, Joyce...

0:25:430:25:49

-..in the Eisteddfod...

0:25:490:25:51

-..not just in Maes B but in

-the pavilion in the Eisteddfod gig.

0:25:520:25:56

-There were thousands

-of people there.

0:25:560:25:59

-The pavilion gig was fantastic.

0:25:590:26:02

-There were so many different ages

-in the crowd.

0:26:020:26:05

-In Maes B, it's mostly youngsters.

0:26:060:26:08

-There were thousands there.

0:26:090:26:11

-We broke a record in Maes B.

0:26:110:26:13

-It was the biggest crowd

-ever to attend Maes B.

0:26:130:26:16

-It's been going for 20 years.

0:26:160:26:18

-Thanks to Anglesey, Maggi.

0:26:180:26:20

-Thanks to Anglesey, Maggi.

-

-Goodness me, yes.

0:26:200:26:23

-It was a noisy night.

-My farm's not that far away.

0:26:230:26:27

-The seats were damp in the pavilion!

0:26:280:26:31

-Those girls had a great time.

0:26:310:26:35

-Fair play,

-you're sexy and that helps.

0:26:350:26:38

-Do you know what I mean?

0:26:380:26:40

-He's brave too. His mother

-always used to cut his hair.

0:26:400:26:45

-That's true.

0:26:450:26:47

-No-one else, no-one professional,

-cut my hair until I was 25.

0:26:470:26:53

-Was that her job?

0:26:530:26:55

-Was that her job?

-

-I hope that's what she did.

0:26:550:26:58

-She was a mobile hairdresser, she

-did a lot of blue rinses at home.

0:26:590:27:03

-The smell of ammonia

-in our house was horrible.

0:27:030:27:06

-Mam had conned me though.

0:27:080:27:10

-She said that no-one

-could touch curly hair but her.

0:27:100:27:15

-She said someone else would want

-to straighten out your hair.

0:27:150:27:21

-When I was 21, only 21...

0:27:210:27:24

-..I went to see Gav next door

-and he shaved it all off...

0:27:240:27:28

-..and gave me a Mohican!

0:27:280:27:30

-Tell me, because I want to know

-these things...

0:27:320:27:34

-..they won't ask you this on Heno...

0:27:350:27:37

-..with this lovely hair you have...

0:27:370:27:40

-..do the curtains match the carpet?

0:27:400:27:43

-That's what everyone wants to know!

0:27:440:27:46

-What would you say

-is my hair colour?

0:27:460:27:49

-Ginger.

0:27:490:27:50

-Ginger.

-

-It's more ginger everywhere else!

0:27:500:27:53

-On my face, for example.

0:27:530:27:54

-Nothing matches with me.

0:27:550:27:58

-Goodness me, no.

0:27:580:28:00

-I've pulled the carpet up -

-there's laminate floor there now!

0:28:000:28:04

-Joyce tried to tell me

-that she shaves but she doesn't.

0:28:040:28:10

-Grass doesn't grow on a busy road!

0:28:100:28:13

-Isn't that right, Joyce?

0:28:150:28:18

-Goodness me.

0:28:180:28:20

-These songs,

-where do they come from?

0:28:210:28:24

-I don't know.

0:28:240:28:26

-What's the process - what comes

-first? The music or the lyrics?

0:28:260:28:31

-It's the music with me.

0:28:320:28:34

-I have a short span of attention.

0:28:340:28:38

-If it's not something

-that's memorable right away...

0:28:380:28:41

-..I won't carry on playing it.

0:28:410:28:43

-What's that?

0:28:450:28:47

-What's that?

-

-The taste of the grapes.

0:28:470:28:48

-It's strong in the wine.

0:28:490:28:50

-He was meant to be impressed

-with that!

0:28:510:28:53

-Take that song now...

0:28:530:28:56

-..goodness me,

-it's an optimistic song.

0:28:560:29:00

-That must come from the fact

-that you like such a creative life.

0:29:000:29:06

-Does it come from that?

0:29:060:29:08

-It's entirely intentional.

0:29:090:29:10

-There are enough boring

-and sad things in the world.

0:29:100:29:13

-We're brilliant in Wales

-at being boring and sad.

0:29:140:29:17

-We're awesome at it.

0:29:170:29:19

-We write songs that make you

-start drinking whiskey.

0:29:200:29:24

-There's a shortage.

0:29:250:29:27

-It's a song that lifts your spirits.

0:29:280:29:30

-With gigs, too, when you do a gig...

0:29:310:29:33

-..there's nothing worse than

-a slow song where no-one dances.

0:29:330:29:39

-It's nice when people listen...

0:29:390:29:42

-..but I like to watch people

-enjoying themselves.

0:29:420:29:46

-You feed off them.

0:29:460:29:48

-When did your interest in music

-begin, how old were you?

0:29:480:29:51

-I was 13 when I learnt

-to play the guitar.

0:29:520:29:55

-I enjoyed music but I didn't think

-I'd ever write songs.

0:29:550:29:59

-I didn't go out

-for the entire summer.

0:29:590:30:02

-The lads would knock the door

-on their way to playing football.

0:30:020:30:06

-I'd say, "No, I've learnt C."

0:30:060:30:09

-You're a good footballer too.

-Do you still play?.

0:30:090:30:13

-My hips have gone, Maggi!

0:30:130:30:15

-Really? 35.

0:30:150:30:17

-34!

0:30:180:30:19

-I was only a year out!

0:30:200:30:22

-To follow a creative life

-like that...

0:30:220:30:27

-..and having something come out

-of it, that's fabulous.

0:30:270:30:31

-Someone in my family once said...

0:30:310:30:34

-..once you find something

-that you love...

0:30:340:30:37

-..you'll never work again.

0:30:370:30:39

-That's a good way to put it.

0:30:390:30:41

-You've seen a lot

-throughout your musical career.

0:30:420:30:46

-You've visited all kinds

-of different places to perform.

0:30:460:30:50

-How would you like to see the world

-through my perfect eyes?

0:30:510:30:56

-You're on a roll now!

0:30:560:30:59

-The gin's gone to your brain!

0:30:590:31:02

-I like that song.

0:31:020:31:05

-Do you want to hear something cute?

-That's about my son.

0:31:050:31:09

-Many think it's a love song.

0:31:100:31:12

-It's not.

0:31:130:31:15

-We were in Cardiff one Christmas.

0:31:150:31:19

-Ebs looked up and said,

-"Look at the star".

0:31:200:31:23

-It was in the middle of the day.

0:31:230:31:25

-I said,

-"No, there's no star in the sky."

0:31:250:31:28

-He was about 18 months old.

0:31:280:31:30

-I looked up and they were putting

-the Christmas decorations up.

0:31:310:31:35

-There's was a beautiful star

-in the sky.

0:31:350:31:38

-He sees so much -

-he's opened our eyes to the world.

0:31:380:31:42

-It's so nice to write a song

-about your son.

0:31:420:31:46

-Cute.

0:31:460:31:48

-Where did your stupid name

-come from?

0:31:490:31:52

-What the hell does it men? Yws!

0:31:520:31:54

-I thought it was Ywain,

-an abbreviation of Ywain.

0:31:550:31:59

-Where does it come from?

0:31:590:32:01

-It's a shortened version of Ywain.

0:32:020:32:04

-It's a shortened version of Ywain.

-

-Your real name is Ywain.

0:32:040:32:06

-Mam and Dad named me

-after a Tecwyn Ifan song.

0:32:060:32:09

-Well, not after his song.

0:32:090:32:11

-Tecwyn Ifan sang a song about

-a Prince of Wales at one time...

0:32:120:32:16

-..in the... well, a long time ago,

-about 500 years ago.

0:32:170:32:20

-His name was Ywain Gwynedd.

0:32:210:32:22

-He's not as famous

-as Owain Glyndwr...

0:32:230:32:25

-..but he drove the English

-out of Wales three times.

0:32:250:32:29

-He was a Welsh prince.

-You're Ywain with a Y, not O.

0:32:290:32:33

-Mam said it was the old way

-of spelling the name.

0:32:330:32:39

-Having said that,

-Owain means O'r Waun...

0:32:390:32:43

-..from the womb,

-from the vagina, really.

0:32:440:32:48

-Goodness me.

0:32:480:32:50

-Ywain means...

0:32:500:32:52

-..the...

0:32:530:32:55

-The vagina!

0:32:550:32:57

-You're a fanny!

0:32:570:32:59

-Nain calls them beef curtains.

0:33:000:33:04

-You've won plenty of awards.

0:33:080:33:10

-I've been lucky enough...

0:33:110:33:12

-You have hair hanging off

-your eyebrows.

0:33:130:33:15

-That's happened to you before!

0:33:160:33:17

-With your lovely songs...

0:33:230:33:25

-..and I like the fact that Sebona Fi

-is so optimistic and lively...

0:33:250:33:30

-..and lifts someone' spirits...

0:33:300:33:32

-..in such a shit world...

0:33:330:33:35

-..if you could throw glitter

-over one thing in this world...

0:33:350:33:39

-..to make it better,

-what would it be?

0:33:400:33:42

-You could throw glitter

-over so many things.

0:33:430:33:46

-I don't want to become

-too political...

0:33:460:33:49

-..but my version of glitter...

0:33:490:33:51

-..my aim in life is to have

-as much fun as possible...

0:33:510:33:54

-..as long as you don't stop

-someone else's fun.

0:33:550:33:58

-If everyone lived their life

-like that, we'd all be OK.

0:33:580:34:02

-That's my glitter.

0:34:020:34:04

-Wise words indeed.

0:34:050:34:07

-Glitter all over.

0:34:070:34:09

-Yws Gwynedd's wise words.

0:34:100:34:12

-Fair play to you, Yws,

-you're a shining star.

0:34:120:34:16

-You've lit up our lives

-this Christmas.

0:34:160:34:19

-Would you do Mags

-one little favour before you go?

0:34:200:34:24

-Would you sing Sebona Fi?

0:34:240:34:27

-# Because we're all running around

-like rats

0:34:280:34:33

-# If you have half an hour,

-humour me

0:34:330:34:38

-# And remember those old things

-that worry everyone

0:34:380:34:41

-# But we're all dirt in the end

0:34:420:34:46

-# Oh, life is so fine

0:34:460:34:49

-# The taste of grapes in the wine

-is strong and the company's good

0:34:490:34:54

-# Oh, life is so fine

0:34:550:34:58

-# The taste of grapes in the wine

-is strong and the company's good

0:34:590:35:03

-Remember, my little chicks, however

-horrible your day has been...

0:35:090:35:15

-..throw some glitter over it

-and everything will be OK.

0:35:150:35:19

-# Oh, life is so fine

0:35:220:35:24

-# Oh, life is so fine

0:35:310:35:34

-# The taste of grapes in the wine

-is strong and the company's good

0:35:340:35:39

-# Oh, life is so fine

0:35:410:35:43

-# The taste of grapes in the wine

-is strong and the company's good #

0:35:450:35:50

-S4C Subtitles by Adnod Cyf.

0:35:510:35:53

-.

0:35:530:35:53

Eleri Siôn, Yws Gwynedd a Dewi Pws sy'n cadw cwmni i Maggi Noggi a Joyce mewn rhifyn arbennig. Secrets galore as Eleri Siôn, Yws Gwynedd & Dewi Pws join Maggi Noggi and Joyce in the salon.


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