The Hamster Effect Danger Mouse

# He's the greatest

# He's fantastic

# Wherever there is danger he'll be there

# He's the ace

# He's amazing

# He's the strongest, he's the quickest, he's the best

# Danger Mouse

# Danger Mouse

# Danger Mouse. #

LOUD EXPLOSION

London, Saturday morning and the world's greatest secret agent,

as voted for by readers of Super-spy Magazine

gets in a rigorous workout...

playing ping-pong?

Faster.

Ha!

Oh, crumbs!

Help!

You know what this reminds me of, Penfold? The day we met.

Um, do you mind having the flashback

after you've saved me, Chief?

Chief?

Trainees, this is the final test before you become Danger Agents.

I call it the "Danger Agent Final Test".

ALLIGATOR SNARLS

SAWS WHIRR

TRAINEES GULP HE SLURPS

Hmm. It all looks a little easy.

Balderdash! You just try it and see.

BLOWS WHISTLE

Not very tiring.

TRAINEE SCREAMS

Hmm. Looks more fun down there.

Hello. I'd like to register my invention -

Penfold's Self-sharpening Pencil.

Hello. I'd like to register my invention -

Penfold's Self-sharpening Pencil.

-Hello. I'd like to...

-PENFOLD SQUEALS

So, when does this difficult test start exactly?

Help!

Nice twist, Colonel. I didn't see that coming.

PENFOLD SQUEALS

Congratulations, Colonel. We'll take the job.

Excellent! But wait a second... What do you mean "we?"

Well, it wasn't any fun without... What's your name?

P-P...P-P-P-P-Penfold!

Right. I'll do it, but only if you hire P-P P-P-P-P-P Penfold.

That's settled, then. Welcome to the Agency, Penfold.

The name's Mouse, Danger Mouse.

Good times, eh, Penfold?

Penfold?

That flashback took so long, I had to call the firemen!

GLASS SMASHES

DM! Isambard Kingkong Brunel has invented something totally useless

and set it loose on the city.

You and what's-his-name get there, ASAP.

Penfold, to the Danger Car!

Isambard Kingkong Brunel presents the latest

in garbage-collecting technology, Trash Tornado.

One pass through your neighbourhood and you'll be saying,

"Thank you, Trash Tornado."

MAN SCREAMS

Never trust a villain's infomercial. Take the wheel, Penfold.

Oh, I hate it when you say that.

Incredible. It was created using the most magnificently devious

mathematical computer modelling ever.

Luckily, I've got one of these.

Meanwhile, Kingkong Brunel works on his next invention -

the Trash Tornado Blueprint Shredder.

That's not funny.

How will the world ever see the brain-boggling genius

of my inventions if Danger Mouse is always there to ruin everything?

Liquid TV, switch off.

BELLS CHIME MONKEY CHATTERING

My time machine!

All I have to do is stop Danger Mouse ever becoming a secret agent.

MONKEY CHATTERING

When does this difficult test start exactly?

PENFOLD SQUEALS

SQUEALING CONTINUES

Ahem. Hello. I'd like to register my invention.

Ha-ha!

-I am...

-A crazy inventor-villain from the future

who's come back in time to stop me joining the agency.

Yes. Thank you so much for ruining my dramatic entrance.

Borrow your hat, Colonel?

I just hope that villain's meddling with time hasn't set off

a chain of events that has radically changed the future.

-What?

-That wasn't a hat.

ALARM GOES OFF

My alarm! Penfold! Why did you let me oversleep?

Ah. There you are, Danger Mouse. What's that on your head?

Yesterday's breakfast.

I think my assistant might be on strike.

What are you talking about, DM? You don't have an assistant.

You know, Penfold? Hamster. Quite short. Says "crumbs" a lot.

Stop daydreaming, DM. We've got an emergency.

Kingkong Brunel's invented something totally useless

and set it loose on the city.

Penfold, to the Danger Car.

Car keys? Oh.

Isambard Kingkong Brunel presents

the latest in garbage-collecting technology -

litter Liquidiser.

It's fast, efficient and friendly.

One pass through your neighbourhood

and you'll be saying, "Thank you, Whatever-you're-called!"

Calculating up-draft.

Who forgot to charge my iPatch?

LITTER LIQUIDISER WHOOSHES

Going up!

Brunel, what have you done?!

-Ever since you meddled with the past, Penfold has disappeared.

-Yes.

Not what I had planned, but one can't win them all.

And when I say "one", I mean you.

Now, where is Pen...?

The world's richest hamster?

Penfold, head of Hamster Corp, is Rich List Magazine's

worldwide genius of the century.

What kind of crazy world is this?

I have to find Penfold.

Buy! Buy! Sell! Sell!

Love it at 40. It's an insult at 50.

Lunch is for wimps.

I have no idea what any of this means, but don't tell anyone.

All right, who ordered the acrobat?

Penfold, it's me, Danger mouse.

The world's greatest secret agent.

Don't you remember? You're supposed to be my assistant,

but a time-travelling villain accidently stopped us ever

meeting and changed the future. I realise this is a lot to take in.

-Did you say I was your assistant?

-Yeah. You wash up,

do the ironing, that sort of thing.

I didn't build up my stationary empire

from one self-sharpening pencil to be anyone's assistant.

Now, where's my Twit-twanging ruler?

Stiletto? What are you doing here?

I am Mr Penfold's assistant, of course.

-Is that a time machine?

-Yes.

The boss uses it to make sure he is never late for his meetings.

So, just a small part for me this week then, eh?

Hurry, Stiletto. I was due at the billionaire's convention

-last Tuesday.

-TIME MACHINE WHIRRS

Wait. What are you doing in here?

Oh, just taking another trip down memory lane.

So, when does this difficult test start exactly?

PENFOLD SQUEALS

PENFOLD CONTINUES TO SQUEAL

You can't meet Danger Mouse!

PENFOLD CONTINUES TO SQUEAL

You're going to meet me if it's the last thing I do.

Oh, no, I'm not!

Ooh, eck. Oh, no.

-What's going on?

-Not a clue.

You know, my horoscope predicted this perfectly.

And they call me crazy!

I've had it with you lot.

All right, future Penfold,

maybe I don't have the right to stop you being rich and successful.

I'll just have to manage on my own. We did have some fun, though.

But I'm a billionaire - that's like a millionaire but with a B.

I get to have whatever I want - yachts, time machines...

more yachts.

Friends?

Don't really have a lot of time for friends.

Sounds nice, actually.

Pst! Off you go. You've got a lifelong friend to make.

-PENFOLD SQUEALS

-Help.

Crikey!

-But...

-CAR HORN BEEPS

Car keys were where they always are.

Honestly, Chief, I don't know what you'd do without me!

-Penfold!

-Wha...?

My iPatch is fully charged.

Of course it is. I mean, what do you think I do all day?

And why did you want me to bring this along?

You'll see. Good to have you back, Penfold.

Things weren't the same without you.

-Quick, take the wheel.

-Oh, crumbs!

Now, Penfold, ping-pong me.

LITTER LIQUIDISER CREEKS

Curse you, Danger Mouse!

LARGE BOOM

MONKEY NOISES

Crikey, we're lucky, Chief.

Messing around with time travel could have

changed the future in all sorts of strange ways.

I'm going to pretend I didn't see any of that.

DINOSAUR ROARS

# He's the greatest

# He's fantastic

# Wherever there is danger he'll be there

# Danger mouse

# Danger Mouse

# Danger Mouse. #

BOOM