Sand, Dirt and Farmers All Over the Place

Get ready for an awesome adventure round Europe with your CBBC mates.

On today's show, Ed has an identity crisis...

"Oh, hello, everyone. My name's George."

..Lauren goes horse,

Susan gets a ticket to the Oscars...

I'll make it glamorous.

..Victoria keeps her zits to herself...

Find your own spot!

..Naomi cleans up,

Johny makes an inspiring speech...

HE BELCHES

..and Hacker and Dodge introduce a brand-new presenter.

A pie? Look at it!

# All over the place All over the place

# North, south, east, west on a bizarre quest

# Me and my mates all over the place

# It's true what you've heard everything is absurd

# Whatever we do is strange but true

# All over the place All over the place

-Hasta la vista

-# There's stuff to do in Europe

# That is totally ace

# And it turns up all over the place. #

The stars are out for the 13th Annual Fiesa Sand Festival!

Lady Gaga!

Ed Petrie, All Over The Place. What do you think of your sand sculpture?

Well, I asked the sand artiste how he made it,

and he said using a small tool,

I poke her face,

puh-puh-poke her face.

-Right.

-Elvis, darling!

I don't believe it! It's the actual Elvis Presley. He lives!

He lives! Elvis, did you help make this?

Well, I have to say, Ed, they did ask for my help

in constructing this beautiful sculpture,

but I had to say, "Elvis has left the building!"

Sorry, I'll have to stop you there.

I've just spotted someone I'm very surprised to see here.

# What a nice conversation! #

Princess Elsa, what are you doing here? You turn everything into ice.

-Well, I have a new magic power.

-SHE GIGGLES

-I can turn anything into sand!

-Wow.

-ARGH!

-Much better.

Oh, how I Olaf-fed.

Ed's been FROZEN in sand

at one of the biggest sand sculpture festivals in the world.

The Fiesa Festival has been taking place in Portugal's Algarve

for 12 years, using the very same grains of sand every time!

That's extreme recycling!

Ed and Victoria, you have 34 seconds to find out

as much as you can about the Fiesa Sand Sculpture Festival.

Victoria, you have Claudia, who organises the festival.

Ed, you have Paulo, who is a sand sculptor.

Tres, dois, um, vamos!

How long did it take to sculpt all these?

Well, it's about seven years.

So why on earth did you start the sand festival?

Well, our director was himself a sand sculptor and he decided

to get a lot of friends together and do a big thing somewhere.

How many sculptures are there here?

Well, erm...

At least more than 50.

Why do so many of them look like pop stars?

Er, because we did the theme music.

What happens if it rains?!

Well, some of them fall, some of them just get damaged

and we have to work on it.

-BUZZER

-Brilliant! Thank you, Claudia.

And the winner is...

-..Ed!

-Ha-ha!

Now, how many sand stars can you spot?

Well, we won't have trouble finding them,

because there are 77 musical sculptures here,

celebrating icons from pop to hip-hop, movie music to groovy music.

They've got so many celebrities here.

Mick Jagger, Madonna, Mary Poppins.

-Johnny Depp!

-They haven't got Johnny Depp, have they?

Yeah. Who do you think that is?

No... He's just some dodgy Captain Jack Sparrow wannabe.

Wonder what he's up to.

Arrrr! Arrr!

Arrr, me back! I need to see me physical therapist,

but he charged an arm and a leg last time.

Well... An arm.

So close to me precious treasure. Just five steps north.

One, two, three, four, fi... Oh, dear.

-What?

-Arrrrr!

I'm a terrifying, Moorish pirate?

Well, I don't think you're very moreish at all.

In fact, I've had about enough of you.

Arrrrr!

I plunder the villages of the Algarrrrve coast.

-I pillage, I steal, I murder...

-What do you want?!

Me? I want...

..to know if you wouldn't mind scooting your chair over

a teeny, weeny bit

If you don't mind. I'm terribly sorry to impose.

No. There's 200km of coastline and 100 beaches in Portugal.

Find your own spot!

I have, and you're on it. X marks the spot.

-Well, I'm not moving.

-Oh, go on!

Can't you do some watersports or something?

The Algarrrrve is famous for its bodyboarding, sailing, jet-skiing.

I came for the looting and the plunder,

-but I stayed for the kitesurfing.

-No!

The Algarve gets 3,000 hours of sunshine a year

and I am going to get as much of it as possible, thank you.

Well, I've been here since half past...the 16th century.

You?

Last Tuesday. All right, you win.

Here you go.

Thanking you.

What are you looking for?

One of the most precious things in the entire world.

Arr, there she is.

What is it?

It's my old night-light.

I can't sleep without it.

I'm afraid of the darrrrk.

I'm sure the script said something about a night at the museum,

hence my evening attire.

Isn't that right, Maurice?

No, no, no, no, no, sleepyhead.

It's not night at the museum. It's daylight outside.

Ah! I see what you're getting at.

Fear not, fair lady, for I am a knight at the museum!

-Neigh!

-Stop it! You are getting this all wrong.

The script actually said it will be dark,

a bit like filming at night-time, at the museum.

Oh! So not night-night, or knight-night.

But night-light.

Exactly! And also, look where we are.

Whoa!

Oh, Maurice loves heavy metal, don't you, Maurice?

This is the largest collection of historic armour in the world.

Hundreds of years ago, this part of Austria

used to be under the threat of attack from angry neighbours,

so this mega-collection of armour was put together

on the off chance that they stopped by

and I don't mean for a cup of tea.

I'm a bit confused, right, because when I see a suit of armour,

I think of knights, but these suits of armour

weren't used by knights, were they?

No, because the armoury was built in the 17th century,

long after the time knights existed,

and the suits were made for normal soldiers.

Ah, that explains it.

But, Bettina, I think

I can hear the sound of those angry neighbours coming to attack.

-So follow me!

-Ohhh!

-First of all, you need a helmet to protect your head.

-Right.

And how long would it actually take to make one of those?

Probably, like, an hour or something?

I would said four or five days, depending on the type

and the shape of the helmet.

-Oh, hang on!

-HEAVY FOOTSTEPS

-It sounds like they're coming.

-Follow me.

-Quick!

Only me! Hello and welcome to...

This 16th-century full-body field armour was once owned

by Archduke Karl II.

Is it worth ar-mour or less than my snazzy pink salmon jacket

that was once owned by my uncle Clive?

Feel the quality of that.

Oh, yeah. It's a nice linen, that. It really is.

But I'm going to say I reckon that is worth more. Ar-mour.

Really?

Well, it shouldn't be, but, yes. You're correct.

This is actually worth a whopping £350,000.

Beginner's luck.

Question two is about this horse armour.

Armour for a horse!

It comes in five parts, but what I want to know is does it cost ar-mour

or less than this entire ceiling full of hooded marksman's helmets?

I think that the horse armour is probably quite rare.

-So I reckon ar-mour.

-What?

Oh, yeah, the horse. Have you been looking at my answers?

-No!

-This armour is worth £3 million!

And all these helmets, well, they're not worth that.

I tell you what, not beginner's luck, my friend.

Now, you may have noticed that I'm wearing a very attractive

metal coif, which is what soldiers used to wear to protect their heads.

But what I want to know is

is it worth ar-mour or less than my cough.

HE COUGHS

Right, that is ridiculous.

You are just making up questions so that I get it wrong.

No. Ar-mour or less?

Ugh, fine. Ar-mour.

Ohhh!

You were so close, but no.

No, my cough or any other noise that comes out of my mouth

is worth at least £1.50, whereas this is a replica.

So it's worth nothing. You've won nothing.

-This is a stupid game.

-Goodbye.

-Do you want to do some jousting?

-No.

# I really love to clean

# I've just got a taste for it

# I feel like I could scrub for all that I'm worth

# Well, here in Bydgoszcz, you're in the right place for it

# The museum of soap tells the history of dirt

# Ooh, yeah!

# I am hugely into hygiene

# And how in the past people kept clean

# Then this museum is the one for you

# But I need to tell you something

# I really, really, really, really, really like cleaning too

# Are you joking? Are you joshing?

# I want to clean with you

# I really, really, really, really, really like cleaning too

# All the scrubbing and the washing

# It's like a dream come true

# Oh, cos they make soap here

# They've been doing it for 200 years

# I really, really, really, really, really like cleaning too

# I want to clean with you

# This primitive loo is a real revelation

# All that they have done is cut a hole in a chair

# This medieval bath is no cause for celebration

# Cos it turns out back then bathing was pretty rare

# Ooh, yeah!

# Laundry, well, it wasn't easy

# Try this mangle, nice and squeezy

# Or freshen up with hundred-year old soap

# I don't think we're allowed to use it

# I really, really, really, really, really like cleaning too

# All the rinsing and the brushing

# I want to clean with you

# I really, really, really, really, really like cleaning too

# All the scouring and the buffing

# It's like a dream come true

# Oh, keep your clothes pristine

# With this '50s-style washing machine

# I really, really, really, really, really like cleaning too

# I want to clean with you

# For most of history

# Soap was made from fat

# So it's no mystery

# People didn't fancy that

# To get rid of grime

# Was hard, you see

# Back in Roman times

-# They washed their clothes in...

-We'll leave that there

# I really, really, really, really, really like cleaning too

# All the dusting and the mopping

# I want to clean with you

# I really, really, really, really, really like cleaning too

# Keep on wiping, never stopping

# It's like a dream come true

# Oh, you can't clean too much

# Keep on polishing till it's squeaky to the touch

# I really, really, really, really, really like cleaning too

# I want to clean with you. #

So, I've been the famous Pinocchio for over 100 years now.

-Wow, that's great news.

-Yeah.

Had to do some pretty crazy things,

though, to become the famous Pinocchio.

What kind of crazy things?

Get swallowed by a massive fish.

-Had to out-fox a fox and a cat. Oh, they were clever.

-OK, and?

Dig a tunnel to Australia.

Make a cake out of hair.

Run faster than a giraffe.

Go swimming with mermaids.

Rode a unicycle over a rainbow.

No, Ed. That was a lie!

-I'm not Ed, I'm Pinocchio.

-You're Ed!

And that nose is rubbish. Take it off.

Yeah, lose the nose, Ed, but keep the outfit,

cos you'll fit right in here in Pinocchio Park.

This park contains all the characters from the book

The Adventures Of Pinocchio, the puppet boy who came to life.

It was a book way before it was made into a film

and it was written right here in the village of Collodi.

I'll bet there are loads of characters here you know

and some you don't.

It's time to get reading.

-This is the Blue Fairy.

-Oh, I know about this.

She was based on a girl in Collodi's village

and the character is called Blue Fairy because she's got blue hair.

-SUSAN GASPS

-Maybe someone will put me in a book

and call me the Brown Fairy

because of my brown hair.

Doesn't sound quite as glamorous, does it?

I'll make it glamorous!

It wasn't a fairytale story for Pinocchio, though.

Things didn't always turn out so well.

Oh, yes. This is the sea monster that swallows Pinocchio

and his father Geppetto.

Right. Still, got a bouncy castle!

I love a bouncy castle!

Erm, no, Ed, the tongue's strictly a decorative feature.

It's not a bouncy castle, Ed.

HE SCREAMS

Oh, me back!

Even Pinocchio's pals had to be careful in this tale.

Hey, Ed...

-You know how Pinocchio had a friend who was a talking cricket?

-Yes.

His best friend. His best friend in the whole wide world.

It says here in the book that Pinocchio killed his friend

the talking cricket.

With a hammer?!

Ew...

And here's where it all began for Pinocchio, in Geppetto's workshop.

-Oh, dear.

-Oh, no. What now?

It says here in the book that Pinocchio fell asleep one evening

and got his feet burned off in the fire.

Of course he did. Course he did.

Ooh, no, it's OK though.

-Geppetto made him a new pair in his workshop.

-I don't care.

I don't want to be Pinocchio any more. I'm quite happy being Ed.

But they're lovely wee feet!

All the bad things that happen to Pinocchio

happened when he was telling fibs.

I think the writer was trying to tell us something.

Oh, yeah! Don't lie.

I didn't do it. Why would I do it?

I don't even like pork pies.

You're telling pork pies, more like, you animal!

Easy, easy, Hacker.

If Mr Petrie's sure he didn't nick them pies, then he can prove it

with a lie detector test.

-No sweat.

-Let's see...

When people tell big fat whoppers like you do,

they tend to get a little bit hot and sticky,

so stick this bucket under your armpit, son.

All the way in! That's good. Good, good.

So...

Did you take the pork pies?

No, I didn't.

-Guilty! Look at the liquid on you.

-That was you!

Poured your milky brew in there.

I did not!

All right, let's check his heart rate.

-Oh, 'ello!

-Hiya.

When people find themselves in a stressful situation,

-such as lying!

-Lying!

Their hearts go boom, boom, boom...

..boom.

-So...

-HEART BEAT

Did you take the pork pies?

-No, I didn't.

-STEADY HEART BEAT

-HEART RATE INCREASES

-Ooh!

-Guilty!

-Guilty!

-Guilty!

-That was you.

Ooh, it were not. Get off. No, no, no!

That's it. We'll try one more test.

It's a well-known scientifical fact

that if you look away, then you're lying.

-Hmm!

-Bring it on.

Did you steal the pork pies?

No, I didn't.

A pie?

-Look at it, with your eyes!

-What?

Guilty, he looked away!

-Guilty!

-Guilty!

-You distracted me with a pork pie.

-MUFFLED:

-No, I didn't.

-No, that wasn't me! No.

-Right, that's it.

I know a liar when I see one.

Sweating, heart going boom, boom, boom,

refusing to look me in the eye!

PC Hacker, take this pie thief down the cells.

-Can I finish me pie first?

-Oh, yeah, knock yourself out.

-I'll save you the lid.

-Thanks.

3,891...

Oh, I am so ready to be Serbia's very best athlete.

Yeah. Not much competition round here.

I don't know, there's the Chelsea footballer Branislav Ivanovic.

He's from right here in Srem.

And then there's also the legendary tennis player, Novak Djokovic.

All Bran and Joke-ovic?

Pull the other one, Johny.

But the local guy around here, apparently the local hero,

is a guy called George.

George?!

"Oh, hello, everyone. My name's George."

-"What a lovely sounding chap!"

-"Anyone for cricket?"

He's standing behind me, isn't he?

Yeah. Do you want to practise sprinting, Ed?

I'm sure George will catch up with you two later

because this is the Srem Shepherd Lunch

and it's been feeding hungry Serbians since 2010,

celebrating rural farming, Serbian culture and tough farm challenges,

like pushing cargo and carrying heavy loads.

Why are we carrying this wool sack?

-TRANSLATION:

-Well, this is a traditional shepherd's lunch.

One discipline is the wool sack race. I'm last year's champion.

How about that, now?

Actually, you and I do have some history with wool sacks, Johny.

But oh, yes! Ed has pulled in front and Ed wins by a whisker!

Ah, we were so young and happy then...

Happy? I was absolutely gutted. I got pipped by the Petrie.

Will I get my chance at vengeance, George?

Oh, yes, you can get even. There are seven disciplines.

One of them's the wool sack. By the way, I need to go.

Did he say seven disciplines?

He did say seven and you two don't have a moment to lose.

First event in the heptathlon, the shepherd's long jump.

So ready, steady, jump!

Oh!

-Best...

-That's the best? Yes!

I won!

Johny jumped two metres, but Ed's long legs managed 2.11 metres.

Round One goes to team Ed.

Next up is the rock throw. It involves throwing a rock

the furthest distance possible.

Don't try this at home, kids! Rocks can really hurt

and that's not ROCK-et science.

Come on!

Stand back, everyone. Stand back.

Don't know how that was. It's all about technique.

It's really heavy.

Oh!

-Is that all right?

-That's quite good.

-Who is it? Who won? Who won?

-You.

-Who won? Who won? Me?

I won the rock throw.

I won, yes!

Ed takes the second event with a throw of six metres and 42cm,

beating Johny's measly 5.85m.

2-0, Team Ed.

The third event is corn husking,

removing all the corn from two cobs using this piece of metal

and your bare hands,

just like champ George.

WHISTLE BLOWS

Ah, that's more like it!

Right, come on.

Come on, corn!

Ooh! Ooh! Oh, my hands!

Johny husks his corn in just over 20 seconds,

ten seconds fast than Ed. The comeback is on!

Next up, shepherd's rod pull,

a game of manly strength that's a bit like a tug-of-war

with a shepherd's crook.

First one to pull the opponent onto his feet is the winner.

-Whoa!

-Yes!

-Yes!

-APPLAUSE

Years of pain went into that!

Johny gets the scores back to level pegging.

At the halfway stage, it's tied 2-2.

The fifth event is the pumpkin dash,

a 50m sprint without dropping any fruity cargo.

Never drop your pumpkin.

Oh, Johny takes the anticlockwise route.

With all the pumpkins staying in the barrow,

he heads down the home straight to put the pressure on Ed.

Whoa!

Ed chooses to go clockwise. It's a bold move.

It's a fast finish and a full cargo. Has the gamble paid off?

What was that?

-You beat me by, like, 0.1...

-I beat him! Yes!

Ed snatches the momentum back,

completing the course in just over ten seconds,

ahead of Johny's 11 seconds.

Johny has to win the next one to take it to the final event.

Hang on, there's no time for a juice break, boys!

Oh, sorry.

This is actually the penultimate event, drinking through the straw.

Johny evens the scores,

taking it to three events apiece going into the final round -

the wool sack race.

How do you feel, Johny?

Anything to say about that victory?

HE BELCHES

That boy has no manners!

It's time for the big one, the Srem wool sack race.

Whoever wins this one takes the All Over The Place trophy,

but remember four years ago,

Johny was pipped at the post by Ed in the Tetbury wool sack race.

Can he get sweet revenge today?

I thought I had you.

Tell me honestly, have you been practising carry wool sacks

-since series two? As if I would!

-Praying for a day like this?

Not at all.

Every single day for the last four years.

My... Oh, wow, he's gone so quickly! Ooh!

You see, he's gone without his trainers on.

I know, but he nearly slipped over.

Right, let's do this, boys.

Three, two, one, wool sack!

Ed starts off slow and steady. He doesn't want to fall in.

Come on, you stupid thing!

Oh, Ed stumbles over the line, but is it enough to beat Johny?

That didn't feel very good.

I was really hoping he'd fall in.

It'd take the pressure off.

Apparently part of the ritual is I have to take it back for him.

And they're all cheering him again.

Ed pranced across the pontoon in 16.09 seconds.

Will Johny risk everything for the victory?

It's very, very slippy, Johny.

And very, very dangerous.

Johny's off. Oh, he stumbled there!

Steadies himself on the pontoon.

This one is going to be close. Up the bank and, oh, he's over the line!

Oh... I just hope that was enough.

-Best time!

-I won? Yeah!

Yes!

No...

I think. I just think that maybe he's won.

Johny leaps over the line in 16.01 seconds,

taking the final Shepherd's Heptathlon score to 4-3.

Johny is the champion!

Oh, George.

Thank you.

Yes, I feel so good.

I've been carrying this load for the past four years, Ed,

and now I give it to you.

Wargh!

Oh, that's a load off my chest. Ha-ha!

You've been watching All Over The Place Europe!