Olive Seed Spitting in Spain All Over the Place

If you want to see how I get on in an event

where it's not actually rude to spit, keep watching!

That was all right, wasn't it?

It's more than all right, Ed, cos it's time for the zaniest programme

on your telly-box!

Chris looks like a muppet...

Victoria dances like a puppet...

Dance for me! Dance!

..Johny rides an extreme train...

Surfin' the air, baby!

..and Iain ends up in pain.

# All over the place

# All over the place

# North, south, east, west On a bizarre quest

# Me and my mates all over the place!

# It's true what you've heard, everything is absurd

# Whatever we do is strange but true!

# All over the place

# All over the place

# There's stuff to do in Europe that is totally ace

-# And it turns up...

-..all over the place! #

Denmark - Copenhagen!

Copenhagen was named the world's first ever bike city.

People in Denmark are WHEELIE into cycling...

..and enough to fill Wembley football stadium three times over!

But before Ed and Chris get a chance to practise some pedalling...

The All Over The Place rules dictate that we must pimp our bikes.

Very important that your bike has a light.

Mine's got ten.

Get a little peckish mid-ride....

we've got a banana holder, baby.

Your protein. They've got protein, right?

Everyone's going to hear me coming with this.

PFFRRT!

It was the last one they had in the shop.

Bean bag seat.

Now we're talking.

Your hair can get pretty windswept on a bike,

which is why it's important to have...

a hair gel dispenser.

You should also wear a helmet, so this is kind of pointless,

but I'm going to put it on anyway.

To keep it fly we've got some fluffy dice.

Die.

Wait till Chris sees this!

Ed, how did we not notice this?

What?!

This is like some weird, hybrid bike the like of which I've never seen!

It's got two seats, two sets of handlebars...

It's called a tandem.

-New on the market, are they?

-No.

If you thought this one was weird, Ed,

a tandem was made in the Netherlands

that 35 people could ride,

and was over eight times longer than yours!

I think you'll find this one enough of a handful, though...

CHRIS LAUGHS

Ooh, sorry! Oh...

Nearly lost my leg, there.

Hello, we're tourists.

I don't know if you spotted it.

No, they'd never have guessed(!)

Let's see how much speed we can get up on this. Come on!

Yeah, obviously not much, then.

PFFRRT!

Oh, look at that!

Tiny, dinky bike lights.

Oh... Oh, we just missed the green light.

-Hello!

-Hi!

Do you like our bike?

Oh, yeah, it's quite colourful.

Do you cycle a lot in Copenhagen?

Yeah, every day.

No waiting for buses, no angry bus drivers, and...

Just me and my bike.

PFFRRT!

Hey-hey!

If you added up the total distance

the people of Copenhagen cycle in just one day,

it would be the same as cycling 30 times around the earth!

Now that sounds...

TYREing!

Dismount!

Just gotta get it...

Oh, no!

Oh, that's what always winds me up about riding a bike -

stairs!

How are we going to get past the stairs?

Oh, it was all going so well!

It's a tandem, it's really heavy, we won't be able to lift it,

we'll have to go all the way round, it's going to take ages...

Oh, stairs, stairs!

Look at them just standing there, STAIRing at me in their STAIRy way.

I hate stairs!

As well as these ramps and special traffic lights,

cyclists in Copenhagen get fancy rails to lean on

while they're waiting at the lights.

Good for them, eh?

But the cyclists do have one problem here...

Kerb.

Ooh!

Wahey! Whoa...!

Well, we can't park here, mate.

This is the problem with riding a bike

in a city where everybody rides a bike. No spaces.

Anyone seen a parking space?

Got to say, guys, that tandem looks pretty silly.

Surely you could have picked a cooler model than that?

Hi, Vic.

I see you've copied me and got yourself a bike. Awkward.

Well, actually, it's a racer. Yeah!

It's got carbon forks and alloy frames, and it's super lightweight!

Look!

And it means it goes really, really fast.

But, I mean, I bet yours has got a lightweight frame, too. Yeah?

Well, it's got a light...and a frame.

CREAK

CLANG!

Well, this bike was built to cut smoothly through the air,

which means it goes really, really fast!

It was designed - get this -

in a wind tunnel!

Yours?

In a shed.

Oh... Lovely.

Well, I'll see you later, Ed!

Much later. Bye!

What's that?

That's not a racer.

No, it's a folding bike.

HE MOUTHS It's amazing!

I can cycle it wherever I like, and then just hop on the bus.

And because it comes everywhere with us,

I don't even need to worry about security.

Well, me neither.

No-one's stealing my bike!

I've got two locks.

Aah!

Oh, dear.

Well, bye!

BELL RINGS

Oh!

Hi, there!

Got myself a folder.

Where's yours?

Oh, I got rid of it.

I've been down in the dumps.

Oh, sorry to hear that.

No, I mean, I've literally been down in the dumps - and look what I found!

-That's my old bike!

-Yeah!

It's not used up any of the world's scarce resources -

it's carbon neutral!

And best of all, it was free - which is even better than fast!

Bye!

HORN HONKS

Free is better than fast?!

We'll see about that!

Argh!

Netherlands - Zaandam.

Dutch windmills used to prevent flooding

by pumping water from the land!

# Pump out the dam

# Pump it out

# No water is remaining

# Pump out the dam

# Pump it out

# The land you are reclaiming

# Pump out the dyke

# If you like the land you now can use it

# Pump out the dam

# Pump it out

# Keep pumping or you'll lose it

# Windmills

# At Zaanse Schans

# They say that windmills built the Netherlands

# Windmills

# Because, you see

# Some of the Netherlands is lower than the sea

# Over 600 windmills across this plain

# Now only ten pairs of sails remain

# They're used for storing wood Grinding oil and spice

-# Shall we go and check some out?

-Yeah, that would be nice

# De Huisman's the windmill and warehouse combined

# And as I can smell it, spices it grinds

-# De Kat is a paint mill

-You serious?

# It grinds down the pigments from raw materials

# De Zoeker once helped drain this area

# The thought we're below sea level's pretty scary, yeah?

# An oil and a paint mill and cocoa too

# That's quite a lot - is there nothing they can't do?

# De Bonte Hen has a rotating cam

# A feature it shares with Het Jonge Schaap

# Which with its six sides is uniquely shaped

# De Bonte Hen's octagonal

-# That's six

-No, eight

# Windmills

# At Zaanse Schans

# They say that windmills built the Netherlands

# Windmills

# Because, you see

# Some of the Netherlands is lower than the sea

# Pump out the dam

# Pump it out

# No water is remaining

# Pump out the dam

# Pump it out

# The land you are reclaiming

# Pump out the dyke

# If you like the land you now can use it

# Pump out the dam # Pump it out

# Keep pumping or you'll lose it

# The Paltrok windmill is used for sawing wood

# It's lived in three places and now here for good

# The whole thing can turn on a ring of wooden rollers

# If we ask them nicely do you think they would show us?

# Talking of windmills

# I'd like to prove it's also the name of a breakdancing move

# The sort of thing I can pull off with ease. #

Be my guest.

What's Dutch for, "Call the doctor, please?"

# Windmills

# At Zaanse Schans

# They say that windmills built the Netherlands

# Windmills

# Because, you see

# Some of the Netherlands is lower than the sea

# Pump out the dam

# Pump it out

# No water is remaining

# Pump out the dam

# Pump it out

# The land you are reclaiming

# Pump out the dyke

# If you like the land you now can use it

# Pump out the dam

# Pump it out

# Keep pumping or you'll lose it. #

Germany - Wuppertal

Germans tell the time differently from us -

we say half past the hour, they say half to the next hour!

Argh! Aarggh!

Ed, Ed, calm down! What's the matter?

Johny, when I woke up this morning,

I was definitely the right way round.

-Yeah.

-But look...

that train's upside down!

So, either that train is upside down, which is really weird,

or I'm upside down, which is even weirder!

It's the only plausible explanation!

Oh, settle down, Petrie!

It's meant to be this way up.

This dangly delight is the Wuppertal Schwebebahn suspension monorail.

It hangs from a single track above it,

and it uses electricity to make it move.

So, calm your fears - it's definitely NOT upside down!

-I'm still confused.

-Yeah, me too!

'What you need are some facts, then!'

'Ed and Johny, you have 45 seconds

'to find out as much as you can about the monorail!

'Ed, you've got Oliver,

'who knows all about the way the monorail was built and works.

'Johny, you've got Michael.

'who knows all about the history of the monorail.

'Whoever finds out the most facts is the winner!

'Drei, zwei, ein, go!'

What is the top speed of the monorail?

Oh, right! It's not that fast, then.

How old is the monorail?

Wow, that's amazing!

How many rivers does the monorail cross?

Just one? What a great name for a river! The River Wupper!

People must have been very scared of it initially.

Has anybody ever got married on the monorail?

Very often!

And now how do people feel about it?

How many people can fit on a train?

Wow, 200 people on one of those? That's quite good.

What makes it so special?

That sounds amazing! It's cool - I wish we had one in Sheffield!

-How many people use it in...?

-KLAXON

Ugh! I'll never find out how many people use it every day.

It's probably on the internet.

'Actually, I know.

'Around 85,000 people travel on the monorail every day.

'And the person that found out the most facts is...

'both of you!'

-Oh!

-Oh, OK!

'And your prize for coming first is a ride on the monorail!'

But we'd already bought our tickets!

Thanks for nothing, Voiceover Man.

'Honestly, there's just no pleasing some people!'

Oh, don't worry, I'm sure they'll cheer up when they realise

they're on the oldest working monorail in the world!

It needs 472 bridges and supports to keep it in the air,

which together weighs 19,200 tonnes...

-Extreme sky train!

-Surfin' the air, baby!

Ho, ho, those two are tuned to the moon!

But, it's not just people that have ridden on the monorail -

on the 21st of July 1950, something very strange happened

in one of these carriages.

Roll up, roll up! Come marvel at the famous travelling German circus,

here for one night only in Wuppertal. Amazing!

Excuse me, sir, is that your elephant?

It's in my seat.

Oh, terribly sorry.

Er, Tuffi, budge up for the gentleman, would you, please?

There's a good girl.

-ELEPHANT TRUMPETS

-Incredible!

Actually, what IS an elephant doing on here?

Well, Tuffi and I are performing tonight, for one night only -

tickets still available.

So, I thought it would be a good idea to put her on public transport

and ride her round the city to drum up a bit of interest!

Huzzah!

Why didn't you just put an ad in our local newspaper?

Poppycock!

When was the last time you saw an elephant on public transport?

People will be talking about this for years!

Incredible!

Actually, I've never seen an elephant on a suspension railway before -

it is pretty incredible.

Ah, yes, well - sorry, WHAT railway?

Suspension railway! We're on the Wuppertal Schwebebahn.

It's beautiful, isn't it? Look at that, down there!

-CAMERA CLICKS

-Ah...

Tuffi's not too good with heights.

I thought this was a normal train.

The carriages rock around a bit, as well...

Oh, don't worry about that,

it only swings a maximum of 15 degrees either side.

You'll be fine. Unless you're an elephant, of course!

HE CHUCKLES

TUFFI TRUMPETS

-Oh...

-Tuffi, don't smash up the furniture!

Oh, there goes my seat...

Be a good girl and I'll give you a peanut!

TUFFI TRUMPETS There goes the carriage door!

-Strong girl, isn't she?

-Oh, yes.

-TUFFI TRUMPETS

Tuffi, no!

SPLASH!

I've never seen anyone leap into the river like that before!

That was amazing!

-Huzzah!

-CAMERA CLICKS

Well, at least she packed her trunks.

Italy - Sicily.

Italians invented the thermometer, the piano, spectacles,

the espresso coffee machine... and loads more!

I just told them I want a bigger role,

as, clearly, I am the best performer. I'm less wooden than you.

Er, newsflash, Ed - you're MADE of wood!

Ugh.

Legend has it that a famous playwright in Japan

was fed up of his actors demanding bigger roles.

He said his plays would be acted better by wooden puppets.

Well, no-one's going to pull MY strings. I'm my own person.

Technically, you're just a puppet.

How dare you?!

Well, yeah, I suppose that is true.

Oi, you! I am TRYING to flounce off camera!

That's better.

This is the International Puppet Museum in Palermo,

which has one of the biggest collections of puppets

in the whole of Italy.

Over 200 years ago, puppet shows were all

the rage with grown-ups, not kids,

and there was one performed in

every neighbourhood in every town in Sicily.

My own fascination with puppets came through my husband.

He was very, very enthusiastic about puppets

since he was a very small boy,

and so we decided to make a collection.

So, people went to the theatre to see a puppet show,

maybe like how we watch TV today?

-Yes.

-Yeah...

-That's it, because there was no TV, there was nothing.

Then started to come TV and cheap cinema.

What's your favourite puppet out of all of these?

A good mother mustn't tell which are the favourite child!

THEY LAUGH

They're all listening, as well, aren't they?

Don't be silly, they can't hear you, Ed, you muppet -

they're puppets!

# Like a puppet on a string... #

There are only nine puppet theatres left in the whole of Sicily,

and luckily this is one of them.

Now kids, grown-ups and these two big kids get to watch.

Bonus!

These Sicilian puppet shows told well-known stories

about knights and princesses,

and usually involved some kind of battle or barney!

The puppet masters, the guys who pull the strings,

play all the characters

and do sound effects by stomping their special wooden shoes.

These Sicilian puppets are called marionettes.

And get this - they have a special name in Italian...

Pupo!

No, not the toilet kind...

It sounds ridiculously rude,

but actually comes from

the French and Latin word for doll.

And speaking of rude, it's Gameshow man!

Hello, and welcome to today's game show...

STREET ORGAN JANGLES

Stop it!

Let's meet today's puppets.

What is your name?

Hi, I'm Victoria!

What could you win today?

Well, you could win your very own puppet show!

So, what would it mean to you?

Well, it would mean so much to us,

-because we've had such a tough year, and...

-Yeah, all right.

Stop stringing out your part.

On to...

This is Orlando, and he's a traditional Sicilian pupo.

HE SNIGGERS

"Poop".

He's wearing armour, but he does have a weak spot -

is it A, his heel,

-or B, chocolate eclairs?

-Ooh...

Um...I think it might be his heel.

-Correct!

-Yeah!

-You're on your way.

Let's have a little practice, shall we?

Dance for me! Dance!

On to...

STREET ORGAN JANGLES

Ah! Shh!

Grr.

This is a puppet from Barcelona.

What's he made from?

Is it A, money,

or B, newspapers?

Ooh...I'm so dizzy from all that dancing,

I... C?

Ooh, dear. You can't even string an answer together, can you?

There was no option C!

The correct answer, obviously, was B -

but let's have a little practice anyway, shall we?

Ooh!

Dance! Dance to my invisible strings!

Ha, ha, ha!

STREET ORGAN JANGLES

Will somebody get that small Italian child out of here?!

This is Punch and Judy, the famous glove puppets.

What I want to know is, what was Punch originally called?

Was it A, Fruit Punch,

or B, Pulcinella?

OK, well, I don't really like fruit punch,

so I'm going to say Pulcinella!

Correct! Yes, yes, it is Pulcinella!

Punch was based on a character from Italian theatre,

his name was changed to Punchinello, then shortened to Punch

when Italian puppeteers arrived in the UK.

So, yes, I'm afraid you haven't got through,

and you won't be starring in your puppet show.

-What?!

-So, I'll say goodbye to my puppet on a string -

or should I say MUPPET on a string?

-How do you feel?

-Furious!

You've been stringing me along all this time?

Yes, yes, I have.

Well, I've got a surprise for you from a certain puppet friend of mine!

Ooh, who?

Ooh...

Punch?

Correct.

STREET ORGAN JANGLES

Spain - Cieza.

Spanish is the second most widely spoken language in the world!

# Ego alert, flawless

# Absolutely flawless... #

What you doing, Iain?

All right, Ed?

Just been inspired by the Commonwealth Games,

so I thought I'd create an event all of my own.

-# Absolutely flawless... #

-What, is this the warm-up?

No, this is the actual event.

-What is it? Posing?

-Correct.

I'm the best poser in...all of Europe.

I can pose better than that.

# So macho He's got to be... #

I could be a gold medallist.

I think you'd be fourth placed at best, mate.

You want more posing like this? Watch.

Now look at this posing.

Look at this posing.

Oh, break it up, you two, do you think anyone would want to

watch you showing off for hours?

You're here in Spanish olive country to compete in what could be

the next big Olympic sport!

What, olive-tree climbing?

Yeah, olive-oil drinking?

-Olive-seed spitting?

-Don't be ridiculous, nobody would do that!

Yes, they would!

-You're having a laugh, aren't you?

-NO!

This is the Cieza Olive Spitting Championship.

And, yes, they are trying to enter it as the next big Olympic sport.

Olives literally grow on trees round here, they're actually a fruit

and a member of the drupe family, like a peach or a plum.

I've got a feeling the only plums today will be Ed and Iain.

The local people love olives so much they decided to hold a competition

that crowns the man, woman or child that can spit the furthest distance

on the ground... the stones, that is.

This all sounds a bit odd. I think the boys should find an expert.

So, Jose, why did you start this event? Is it because you hate

olives so much that you spit them out?

-TRANSLATION:

-It isn't that we don't like olives. We like olives a lot.

We have a special variety of olive called Mollar de Cieza.

And there's a popular saying here that

when you've eaten the olive, you spit the stone onto the ground.

Mmmmm.

SPITTING SOUND

LAUGHTER

I heard you're trying to make this an Olympic event.

How do I go about creating an Olympic sport?

Well, we went to the Beijing Olympics to speak to the Committee.

They replied and said we need an international federation.

And we don't have one, so I think we'll have to wait a long time

to see it as an Olympic sport!

Well, you never know, maybe somebody from the Olympic Committee is

watching now and they're going to see what a great sport this is.

Not your posing!

I'm going to set up an International Federation Of Posing, actually.

And I've still got no idea what's happening with this competition.

-Did you just spit on me?

-Sorry, mate, I'm just practising.

-You don't even like olives.

-They're disgusting.

You two are so childish!

But you're too old to compete at the Junior Seed Spitting World Cup.

100 children take part in this event and it must be the only day

of the year their mums and dads actually cheer them on for spitting.

So, do your parents not tell you off for spitting?

-TRANSLATION:

-No, I just take part in the game to participate

and have fun.

-They love it, don't they?

-Love a bit of spitting here.

I tell you what, my mum, if she came here,

a lot of people would be getting told off!

-Oi! Stop spitting.

-Stop that, it's dirty!

Grow up, you two,

it's time to get some tips from the World Champion, Pedro.

# I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man... #

I can't believe that I'm standing next to the current World

-Champion Olive Stone Spitter.

-I am stone struck, quite literally.

And he's got the world record. How far did you spit it?

-TRANSLATION:

-21 metres 43 centimetres.

That is far. And what's your technique?

How do we spit far as well?

-You need 50% technique and 50% luck.

-Right, so...

I think it's just going to be luck here really, isn't it?

I just don't want to eat olives!

So that's 50% technique, boys. First put the stone between your teeth.

After munching some olive, arch your back and...spit.

It's a simple sport really but with some complicated rules.

Listen carefully.

# Olive the place Olive the place... #

Olive spitting can only be performed with the mouth. No other tools,

such as straws, will be allowed.

If the olive stone drops on a spectator or passer-by, the

spitting will be declared invalid.

If a participant breaks the World Record, he or she will be declared

a Venerated Knight Of The Fellowship Of The Olive Spitting Knights.

Those participants using false teeth are recommended to fix them well into

place in order to prevent accidents.

Happy spitting.

While they fix their false teeth, let's take a

look at the pros.

Remember, the current World Record stands at a spitting,

sorry, spiffing, 21 metres and 43 centimetres.

That's like 12 Leo Messis lying down!

Let's see how Pedro gets on this year - can he beat the World Record?

-Here we go, Iain, World Champion.

-Here we go.

Was that good? How many?

He only got 13 metres, I could do 13 metres easy.

Rubbish, mate, rubbish.

Ed and Iain better be careful.

If they step over the line or don't spit far enough,

they'll get a red flag and the split won't count.

They will each get two attempts to break the World Record

of 21 metres and 43 centimetres.

First up, Team Iain.

He looks pretty confident

and he seems to have brought his fan club along.

Time to stop stalling and start spitting.

The spit looked good but it's a red flag for Iain.

Turns out his big foot was over the line so that one won't count.

Next up, Team Ed.

Viva Espana!

Viva Espana!

Come on, Ed, don't be gobby, just spit it out.

No pressure, mate, no pressure.

No, pal.

What? That was all right, wasn't it?

Good shot but his big feet get in the way too. It's a foul.

Iain's first was a foul. It all comes down to his second spit.

Oooh! An epic spit from Iain and no red flag.

Ed's up next.

It all hangs on spit number two.

These olives really are delicious.

Ed's milking it, must be confident.

The spit looks solid.

Oh, let's see that again.

Right to the edge of the screen

but is it enough to beat spitty Stirling?

So, after two attempts, the judges are happy.

The distance is measured. The results are in.

Ed's first attempt was a foul but on his second attempt, his

spit measured an impressive seven metres and 40 centimetres.

Iain also fouled on his first spit

but on his second attempt he blew away the competition with

a gold-medal distance of seven metres and 84 centimetres.

No!

Yeah!

-Oh, stone me!

-Oh, I'm...I'm speechless.

Go on, spit it out.

I don't even like olives!

You've been watching All Over The Place: Europe.