Bathtub Race in Belgium All Over the Place

I'm not having a bath, I mean a laugh.

If you want to see Johny and I soaking up the atmosphere,

then keep watching.

I've got a water balloon with Johny Pitts' name on it.

Don't worry, Johny, Ed's aim is terrible!

But we're on target all around Europe today!

Chris goes bonkers on the beach...

Naomi is hashtag sad face...

Michelle throws some shapes...

Iain loo-ses it...

Victoria gets glammed up...

And is Johny really ready for bath time?

Of course I'm ready. Whoo-hoo!

# All over the place

# All over the place

North, South, East, West, all of us are on a quest.

Me and my mates all over the place.

It's true what you've heard, everything is absurd.

Whatever we do is strange, but true.

# All over the place

# All over the place

There's stuff to do in Europe that is totally ace.

And it turns up all over the place.

Italy, Venice.

Venice is sinking by two millimetres a year!

Ah!

Ah!

-Cut it out, Michelle, I know it's you.

-I'm not Michelle.

-Victoria?

-I'm not Victoria.

-Iain?

-Cheers, Ed.

-It's you.

Why do you keep running away? I'm trying to show you my lovely mask.

Oh.

C'mon, Ed, you're in Venice,

and folk have been wearing masks here for centuries.

Venetians use them to hide their identity so that the aristocracy

and commoners could mix freely at parties.

Maybe it was so no-one would know who'd eaten all the sausage rolls!

This one looks like you.

Well, I suppose it's a bit like my mask, isn't it?

-No, I meant without the mask.

-Oh, ha, ha, ha.

Ed?

This is how I feel every time you tell me a joke.

Believe it or not, about 700 years ago,

doctors wore this scary-looking mask!

Hello, children, don't be scared.

I'm the doctor, I'm here to help you.

The long nose was stuffed full of nice-smelling herbs.

They thought this protected them when visiting patients

with a horrible disease called The Plague.

And it masked the smell.

When did people first start wearing masks in Venice?

-During the 12th and 13th century.

-Wow, so a really long time.

-Why did they wear them?

-Nobody knows who you are.

You're just anonymous. You can have an adventure.

Venetian masks were actually made out of paper!

Layers of paper stuck together called papier-mache.

It was shaped round a plaster mould till it was dry, then cut,

smoothed off and painted!

Sounds easy? Keep watching.

-So, might we be able to have a go at making one?

-Of course.

And now on AOTP TV, it's Ed And Naomi Make Something.

This week, it's Venetian masks.

It's just so easy to make your own Venetian mask, isn't it, Ed?

-It is, it's very easy.

-I'm going to go for greens.

What are you going to choose, Ed?

Erm, I'm going to use some burgundy.

You can never have enough brushes.

Of course, this is water-based paint.

-So, let's put some water in it.

-No!

-Don't put water in.

-Oh, whoops!

-Don't put water in.

-Don't put water in, it's very important.

Just remember, you can never have enough brushes.

-Just do that.

-Super easy.

-Super easy.

-It's super easy.

Just remember, you really can never have enough brushes.

I'm going to be using the double-handed approach to save time.

-It's so easy.

-I can't seem to find the right brush.

-Oh, hang on.

-Thanks, Ed.

-Let me know if you need more brushes.

And there you have it. Two beautifully decorated masks.

-It's so easy.

-So easy.

-Didn't you use green earlier?

-No.

Well, that was interesting.

And with such a selection of masks to choose from, it's hard to know

how to pick the right mask for the right occasion.

Buona sera, sorry I'm late, the canals were murder.

Ed, where's your mask? I told you, this is a masked ball.

-I thought you said bring a masked ball.

-Why would I say that?

Well, I did wonder. Don't worry, there's a uniform shop next door.

I'll be back in two secs.

Wow, the silence in here is amazing. Right, where's the punch?

You can't wear that! That's the wrong sort of mask.

Not if there's a Second World War poisoned gas attack.

Then who will be laughing? I will.

-You won't be able to tell because I'm wearing a mask.

-Ed!

Go back and change it.

Did somebody call the fun police?

Actually, if I was the fun police,

I'd be arresting people for having fun, so, I'm probably...!

Ed! That mask is see-through.

Yes, otherwise I'd keep bumping into stuff, wouldn't I?

Ed, the point of a masked ball is that no-one can see your face.

This is an elegant event, Ed, for elegant people.

If you can't find a suitable masked outfit,

Ed, I am going to have to ask you to leave.

OK, OK, I think I saw the perfect thing, actually.

-We've had reports that this party is on fire.

-Ed!

Right, come on, if you cannot take us seriously,

I won't take you seriously. How's that, hey?

Ta-da! Victoria? Must have popped out.

Barbecue! Ah!

Germany, Krausnick.

The first motorcar was invented in Germany

and the first person to drive it long distance,

was the inventor's wife!

Sat nav says there should be a hotel right here.

A hotel can't be this easy to miss, surely.

All I can see is this huge dome thing.

Maybe someone inside knows the directions, yeh?

-Ed, Ed? You're not going to believe what I just saw.

-What?

-There's a tropical rainforest.

-Hey?

-And a lagoon.

-Hey?

-And a hotel reception desk.

-Huh?

-It's the hotel.

That's right boys, you have arrived at your destination!

And although your hotel now looks like a tropical paradise,

it used to be an aircraft hangar!

They must have hidden the jumbo jets behind the sun loungers.

Ed and Chris, you have 47 seconds to find

out as much as you can about the Tropical Islands resort!

Chris, you have Bernd, who knows about the tropical rainforest!

Ed, you have Patrick, who knows all about the attractions!

Whoever finds out the most facts is the winner.

Drei, zwei, eins, gehen!

Achtung, Chris, Gehen!

So, what's a rainforest?

A rainforest is big trees, pine trees, animals.

-How big is the dome?

-Oh, it's more than 100m high.

How many people visit this rainforest every year?

Every year, nearly a million.

Does that mean you could put the Statue of Liberty inside it?

Yes, it's the greatest freestanding hall in the world.

Have you got any animals living in your rainforest?

Yes, a lot of animals. We have big fish, turtles and birds.

What's that bloke in the balloon doing up there?

-Is he cleaning the dome?

-No, you can...

-What's he doing?

-You can take a balloon ride.

-I can take a balloon ride?

-Yes.

-Inside a building?

-Yes.

-That's how big this place is?

How many different types of tree have you got in here?

We have more than 500 species.

Sorry, I'm talking so fast but I'm trying many questions

as I can in a minute but it's not going very well

because I'm running out of time because I'm saying this.

And the person who found out the most facts is...

-Chris.

-Yes! Get in.

All right, if you stop being smug, I'll let you in on a little secret.

-Go on, then.

-Patrick said we can go on a balloon ride.

-A balloon?

-Indoors?

-Yes.

-That's incredible.

-I know, I know.

I really want to find this balloon, Chris.

I think it's probably this way. Let's try and not get distracted.

Love flamingos. They just make me laugh.

Look at their ridiculous skinny legs and their big beaks.

-Oh, you're ridiculous.

-This place is massive!

So huge that you could fit over 50 Olympic-size swimming pools into it!

But the pools they do have here, have a twist.

They're designed to feel like you're at the beach!

This is clever.

Washes the sand off your feet before you get into the pool.

Well, it is an artificial beach. Ed, the balloon!

Balloon!

Get out of my way, there's a balloon. How excited are you?

I'm about as excited as I was when I beat you in the fact-off.

This is the perfect end to the perfect visit.

Actually, why don't you do some paperwork.

I'm going to have a word with the balloon man before we go up.

Right, OK.

So long, sucker. That'll teach you to beat me at fact-offs.

But I won! I won!

Best selfie ever.

You can almost imagine looking at the whole world from up here.

Imagine if someone really did think this was planet Earth.

At last, the Earth. Scan the area.

At once. A constant tropical 25 degrees.

All year round and 66,000 square metres in size.

The Earth is much smaller than we had imagined.

Our data suggested that the Earth is 500 million kilometres squared.

No matter, it'll make it all the easier to conquer.

I think this is a self-contained artificially created environment.

Why would the humans do that? What purpose would it serve?

Eliminate the need to travel to a hot area.

Don't be a fool, it would teleport there. This is illogical. You are.

-What?

-Erm, nothing.

Scanning, scanning, 27 metres high. 110 steps.

Just one of these stainless steel undulating tubes is

capable of transporting nearly 700 humans per Earth hour.

Impressive and efficient.

I believe this recreational water slide serves no other purpose

than to go really fast.

-What fun.

-Come on!

Whoo hoo!

Wa hey!

I appear to have lost my human shorts.

Switzerland, Meiringen.

Sherlock Holmes' creator, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle,

used to love coming on holiday here,

but I wonder what he would have made

of Sherlock Petrie Holme-y's elementary rapping.

We find ourselves in Switzerland in the very location

Sherlock made his last stand.

These falls are called the Reichenbach,

I deduce that myself.

You just read this plaque.

Here, I fear, Sherlock Holmes met his end,

despite his intentions to apprehend.

Professor Moriarty, his deadly rival, they wrestled and fell,

no chance of survival.

No credible witness saw the fall,

did he escape their fate? We can't be sure.

Who came up with this clever twist?

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, the novelist.

What was the real outcome of this deadly duel?

Unanswered questions add more fuel to the mystery of Holmes,

Moriarty and the falls.

I'll solve this problem once and for all.

# I want to scream

# I want to shout

# You're the detective you're just messing about

# Stop looking for clues and give us some facts

# Like did you know Sherlock really wore that deerstalker hat?

There must be clues round here, can you see them?

How about the Sherlock Holmes Museum?

Inside, the exhibition comes complete with a recreated scene

of his flat in Baker Street.

A newspaper, messy desk, things in disarray.

What does the state of this room convey?

He left in a hurry, there wasn't time to tidy up.

They were after the Napoleon of crime.

Interesting, but what could it mean?

Everything around here is not quite as it seems.

The only thing that is not as it as it seems is you.

So how do you explain this bronze statue?

That's a tribute to Sherlock, can't you see?

But it doesn't look the slightest bit like me.

I'm much better looking, Watson, can't you tell?

That's your opinion and my name's Michelle.

# I want to scream

# I want to shout

# You're nothing like Sherlock of that I've no doubt

# The author, however, is held in high acclaim

# This is Conan Doyle Place

# They've changed the street name

-So many questions.

-Well, not really.

-Things are hazy.

-I can see quite clearly.

The end to the mind palace in my head.

You're not going to find much up there, Ed.

# I want to scream

I can believe what you say to me.

# I want to shout

Finding clues is elementary.

Remember, Sherlock had a famous saying.

When you eliminate impossible, the truth remains.

# Your mind is no palace

# There's not much up top

# This half-baked detecting has just got to stop.

-Ha-ha. I've solved it.

-Go on.

I think you'll find that Sherlock Holmes

and Moriarty were characters in a book.

I rest my case.

Spain, Barcelona.

The Spanish version of the tooth fairy is actually the tooth mouse!

I can't believe we've forgotten to bring the invention

for today's film.

Ah, yes, that's because we're going to meet the great Spanish inventor.

Pep Torres and the Invention Museum here in Barcelona.

-Hang on, hang on. What are these?

-These old things?

Just something I came up with to help remember my lines.

Iain, you beautiful Scottish genius. This is exactly what we need.

They're going to hail us as the stars of the museum. Come on.

Iain and Ed, enter. Iain looks better than Ed.

Oh, hello, Pep, the inventor.

-What do you think of my latest...

-Invention.

-..invention?

Well, I don't know what to say

because, actually, you never know if it's a good or a bad invention

because, you know, there isn't a line between stupid things or not.

Now, I've got to say, I'm a little bit disappointed

because I thought this place was crammed full of unusual

and strange inventions but this is just an exercise bike

and I've seen this before. If anything, it's quite dull.

Well, you're right but inventing is not only inventing one thing,

it's combined. Two normal things, for example.

This exists, also that vending machine exists

but the invention is combining both concepts. That's a real invention.

Oh, right. How does this work then?

You have here some snacks you can get for free.

-You have only to pedal the calories.

-That's an amazing idea.

OK, I'm going to go for almonds.

Almonds are 291 calories which will take Pep around 20 minutes to cycle.

Well, I think we should have a look around and also,

leave these here.

-Keep pedalling, Pep.

-Thank you very much.

-Looking forward to my almonds in about 20 minutes.

-Have fun, guys.

But Pep's most amazing invention is actually this, the museum itself!

It houses all sorts of designs, from the handy,

to the completely useless.

And his aim is to inspire the next generation of inventors!

Ed, come here a minute. This is my favourite invention in a museum.

-Like me, it's absolutely genius.

-What happens when you turn it on?

I'll tell you what, I'll leave you to find out.

That's pretty useless. It's designed to switch itself off!

But there are plenty of useful inventions here.

Teacups to hold your biscuits? Genius!

Sorry, but I'm absolutely bursting.

Iain, that's the handle if you don't wash your hands.

-Oh!

-How did you do that? It was obvious.

Yuck! But what about waterproof covers for your high heels?

Maybe not your style, boys?

Why not try these video camera trainers then!

-How does this work, Iain?

-You know that horrible thing

when you step in dog poo or a slug or something?

These shoes will eliminate that problem.

A little camera on the bottom, OK? You can see what's under your feet.

Isn't that quite dangerous?

You'll be looking at a screen everywhere you go.

-You might walk into things.

-Look. He's got them on now.

CRASHING NOISE

Oh, dear!

I think the remote control cushion is a safer invention,

handy for watching your favourite game show.

It's invention dimension.

It must be your intention to describe the invention that

I mention in less than ten seconds.

-Tell me the purpose of this ingenious piece.

-Is it a dog bowl?

-It's not a dog bowl, the thing in the bowl.

-Green dog food?

No, I'm afraid you're out of time.

It is, in fact, fluorescent dog food.

When you're picking up dog poo in the dark, as I often do,

you don't tread on it by mistake.

Reflect on what this might be.

-It's a plate with a mirror on it.

-Well done, Einstein.

You can do your make-up whilst you eat, you can have all brusher...

Time up. It is, in fact, a diet mirror.

If you're looking after your figure, you can see double the quantity

but eat half as much.

-What is this?

-I know what this is.

This is one of these mops that you can sing while you clean.

You're kara-OK.

This was invented so that you could bop while you mop.

-This means you've won a prize.

-Amazing, what is it?

-It's this.

One of those towels you can hear the sea in?

No, it's for cleaning my shoes. Go one, get on with it.

Haven't got all day.

-That was fun, wasn't it?

-Yeah, great.

Oh, I forgot to get my almonds off Pep.

-He'll have forgotten all about it.

-Yeah.

Belgium, Dinant.

The man who invented the saxophone was born in Dinant.

I mean, seriously, Johny.

How does a bath tub disappear from a hotel room?

Yeah, there was no bath tub in my room, either. Not even a shower.

I mean, a missing towel I can understand.

A missing TV remote. But a bath tub? An entire bath tub?

Hang on a minute, Ed. I think I found our bath tubs.

What have they done to them?

Calm down, guys, this is the annual Bath Tub Regatta.

Each year, hundreds of people gather into teams,

build wacky vessels based around bath tubs, and paddle down-river.

The winner is the first one to cross the finishing line

at the bridge, 1km downstream.

That's about 600 average bath tubs laid end to end.

It's a good thing that Ed and Johny love their baths!

But, maybe not as much as one guy from the United States.

In 2009, he took a bath with 120 rattlesnakes in it.

Eugh! I guess some world records are best left unchallenged!

But, today's challenge is about getting down the river

in a bath-boat and Jean Oliver, the event organiser

will tell you both all about it.

-TRANSLATION:

-This is the 32nd time

and it can be said, there are an average of 20,000 spectators a year.

Why do people love seeing bath tubs being raced?

-TRANSLATION:

-Well, we think it's because it's eccentric

and it's a type of carnival parade that is the only one of its kind.

Everyone knows, we like a carnival in Belgium.

-Come on, follow me, I'll show you the bath tubs.

-Tres bien.

Clean pits ahoy!

Je m'appelle Johny. I'm with your team.

This is your bath? I'm on your team.

-Come on. Allez, come on.

-Is there anything I can do to help?

A bit of painting? Painting the roof.

-Yep, I think that's better.

-Not this, not this bit? I'm sorry.

You're totally ready now, thanks to me. Bring on the race.

The crowds have gathered on the shore and the floats

are bobbing with anticipation.

Johny has nine people in his team and Ed has 14,

but his float is double the size.

Will Ed's hefty vessel beat Johny's lightweight tub over the 1km course

to the bridge? I can't wait to see this.

-Ed, are you ready?

-I was born ready.

-Johny, are you ready?

-Of course I'm ready.

Contenders, three, two, one, go.

Ed and his silly shower cap are off to a flying start

and taking an early lead but Johny...

..is going round in circles.

-What are you doing?

-I'll tell you what, this is harder than it looks.

We haven't even got anywhere.

I have no idea what I'm doing.

Well, you're in luck, Johny, cos Ed is in trouble.

These people are like pirates.

Oh, no, one of our team members has been taken prisoner.

20 minutes into the race and Johny's

finally moving in the right direction and sneaks past

a preoccupied Ed.

This is the most chaotic event I've ever been a part of.

I'll tell you what, this is by far the easiest event I've ever done.

Looks like it, as well.

With Ed trailing behind, he has a word in his Captain's ear!

HE SPEAKS FRENCH

-See? He doesn't care how fast we go.

-It's very good.

-Yes, it's very good.

Ed, the snail, Petrie. That's his name.

Look how better decorated this is than Johny Pitts' boat.

Much better than Johny Pitts, oui?

Ed gets so competitive when he thinks his chances of winning

are going down the plughole, but now his team are actually paddling.

-What more could he ask for?

-When do I get to have my bath?

Ed, you and your precious bath.

Speaking of precious baths.

Did you know that one of the most expensive baths ever was carved

from a single Amazonian crystal

and was worth over half a million pounds?

For that, you could buy a speedboat and add gold taps.

With the teams now halfway down the course, Ed's stopped sulking

and is trying to close the gap on Johny.

And he also has a little present for him.

I've got a water balloon with Johny Pitts' name on it.

Row, we need to row!

Johny's Team look bored of rowing.

The boys are coming face to face. It's water balloon time!

Oh, Ed, that was pathetic! You need something bigger.

Where's that bucket? Can I borrow that a sec? Merci.

Yeah, stick with throwing buckets of water.

I'm surprised I haven't used up all the water in this river.

Ed's float takes the lead

and he's only 200 metres from the finish line!

We need to go.

For some reason, we've just all stopped paddling

-and sometimes even can go round the wrong way.

-So long, Johny.

They've got more manpower than us.

I can smell victory.

Ed can see the finish line. The bridge is so close, but, look,

Johny's not giving up yet. I don't believe it. What's this?

Ed's team have decided to start chillaxing!

HE SPEAKS FRENCH

We don't want to beat us. We want to be cool.

You want to be cool. Oh, OK.

You can try and act cool, Petrie,

but we all know you want to win.

We're too cool to be crossing the finishing line just yet.

Johny's rapidly closing the gap and Ed's getting twitchy!

That's the finish, just there.

What a final push from Johny!

But is it enough?

SIREN SOUNDS

No! Pipped by the Petrie, again.

Ed, is the winner.

Just one more. Come on. Yes! Yes! Have we crossed the line?

How do you park a floating fire engine?

After a confusing start for Johny, river pirate Ed's crew

nearly dropped the ball, I mean balloon, but in the end,

Ed pulled the plug on Johny's dreams

and chillaxed his way to victory, leaving Johny to drift in a full

20 minutes later.

-And the winner is...Ed.

-Thank you.

-Man!

We didn't get our bath but we are having a shower.

-But I really wanted a bath.

-Really?

-Yeah.

You've been watching All Over the Place Europe!