This Means War DIXI

Previously on the Adventures of Billie...

I discovered that the person who deleted Miss Malik's CCTV was...

..Miss Malik!

And now she's decided to expel me before I can expose the truth!

The important thing is not to panic.

You're right. I need to stay strong.

-Too late, I've decided to panic!

-Jane!

Baxter, I know you and Billie are joined at the hip,

but I don't recall inviting you to my office.

But I'm, er...filming a documentary.

Nice try. Now, move along.

You really shouldn't be using your phone during school hours.

PHONE RINGS

Oh. Excuse me.

If she catches me in here, I am dead!

Deader than Boney McBone Face! Extremely dead! All the dead!

Never mind that, I'm already dead!

We need to prove Miss Malik framed me before she can expel me!

Miss Malik's not expelling you!

I volunteer at the Greenhouse after school, you know,

helping the troubled kids, and I appealed on your behalf.

Said you were a first-time offender who was led astray.

She's agreed to shorten your punishment.

-You could be out next week.

-My hero!

Like Captain America, but with really nice hair!

-I can't believe you talked her into this!

-She is too good to be true.

Are you sure you're related?

Freedom or no freedom, we still have a case to crack!

It's password-protected. Maybe she's written it down somewhere.

I'll do this side, you do that side. Hurry!

As someone who's trying to get you out of trouble,

I don't think raiding Miss Malik's office is going to help!

Look, I know it's a terrible plan, but it's my only plan,

so lets go with it, people. There's a supervillain on the loose.

We need to catch them!

This is just confiscated stuff. It's a loom band graveyard in here.

-There must be something that proves she's The Deleter.

-The who now?

The Deleter. That's our villain because they've deleted the CCTV.

That's terrible. Who wants The Deleter as their supervillain?

Everyone knows a hero's only as strong as their nemesis.

And they didn't delete anything, they shredded all the exams.

Oh! We should call them The Shredder!

-I like that! See?

-Leave the super stuff to me.

What is the meaning of this?!

I bring you in here to discuss lifting your punishment

and you're rule-breaking again!

But I didn't break any rules the last time

and you won't let me prove it! Why are you doing this?!

What Billie means is, we're really sorry, Miss Malik.

We were just curious...

Curiosity killed the goose that laid the golden egg.

Maybe. But why would there be CCTV on everywhere except your office?

Oh. Well, actually, I may have turned off the CCTV myself.

-I knew it!

-Because of my interpretive dance.

I did not see that coming.

UPBEAT MUSIC

Last time I danced in my office, someone posted CCTV footage online.

People left rather unconstructive comments,

-so I've been turning the camera off when I practise.

-I'm sorry.

-We won't say anything.

-No, not a thing.

-Of course not.

Well, after this little misadventure, I can hardly

let you out of the Greenhouse early, but lets say no extra punishment.

Jane, since you're here, we need to go through the application forms

for student president. Just the one.

Well, then, Blake Sheen it is.

This can't be happening.

Blake the Snake and probably The Shredder, is running unopposed!

I can't believe I can't run against him!

If he wins, the school will be a living nightmare.

But the deadline for new candidates closes on Friday.

Well, that means we've got one day to find someone who can take him on.

I don't care if I'm still locked up, I'm going to stop Blake

if it's the last thing I do!

So that was yesterday, and I've spent all night since

trying to work out who I can get to run.

It would be brilliant if Jane could do it, RedBlackRappingOwl,

but she's not allowed, seeing as she's already been president.

Silly school rules!

Hello! Hello! It's Echo! Echo!

Miss Malik has suddenly decided she's the uniform enforcer.

Um...hello, hypocrisy.

We all saw her dancing around her office,

but suddenly, she's against self-expression.

Do teachers really think they can strip me of my dark shadows?

Pale me into submission?

They can ban our badges, take our wristbands,

wipe off our make-up, but we will never join the clone army.

I refuse to let them scrub away my personality.

Wow! It looks like biggestcbbcfan13 loves your stuff...Katy?

Talking of fans, Amani's clearly got one in her boyfriend, Alessandro.

Aw! Sweet!

Hi, everyone, it's me, Amani,

coming to you live from the front of the bus!

-Maybe that was too much. I should start again.

-I thought it was good!

Really? I don't know.

Maybe I should have more practice with vlogging.

Vlogging's just like talking to your friends.

-Don't worry and be yourself.

-Thanks. You know, I loved yours, by the way.

That Lip Gloss Like A Boss episode. You're so good at make-up!

Wait a second. This is you wearing make-up.

I'm just kidding.

I'm sure some people are really into the whole sweaty-joggers look.

Blake, I'm wearing joggers cos I ran a 5k before breakfast.

Not all of us like to spend our time in front of the mirror!

Anyway, Jane is right, that's why I started vlogging.

So many people have been kind to me on Dixi since I joined.

I feel like we ARE friends.

So to say thank you, I wanted to start a new series

on sports and fitness.

Now, I know a lot of people don't have time to exercise,

so my first vlog is all about ways you can work out on the go.

Welcome to Bus Yoga!

Step one - let all your stress just melt away.

-Try to block out the rest of the world.

-Amani?!

-But it's not always easy.

-What are you doing?

Um... Looking for inner peace.

Well, tough! This means war.

What does? You seem stressed.

-I was about to do some breathing exercises.

-Don't tell me to breathe!

Of course I'm stressed, and don't pretend you don't know why!

Oh, yeah, I know all about you being stuck in the Greenhouse,

but I'm totally on your side.

Look, I even baked you cookies for moral support!

It's spinach and oatmeal!

I'm not talking about the Greenhouse,

although that was a travesty. Those delinquents put gum in my hair!

But, no, I'm talking about this!

# Well, there's a Greenhouse where you have no friends

# Expect for loneliness

# Oh, there's a Greenhouse where you don't feel much

# Except for emptiness. #

OMG! This is brilliant! I never knew you played this sort of stuff!

I don't. This was the first time.

You should start a band or something. This is so cool!

Oh, yeah, I'm SO cool!

I'm sure that's what you and your boyfriend said after you saw it.

Look at the comments!

-It's my Alessandro!

-As if you didn't know!

Look at how many thumbs it's got. Everyone's laughing at me.

I...I don't understand. This doesn't make any sense.

Selene, I promise, I had no idea.

OK, fine. You're a clueless patsy, but your boyfriend is going to pay.

-I've never even met the guy. How does he know that I am...

-A geek?

Academically superior.

And this happens days after I get framed for a crime I didn't commit!

-He had nothing to do with that.

-Of course you'd say that!

-What's his number?

-No, no, you don't need to call him.

-Please, I just need to talk to him!

-This is your one chance.

Give me his number and help me get even or we are not friends.

-I didn't think we were friends.

-Good point. Then we'll be enemies.

Please! I promise, I'll sort this.

So be it. Stay out of my way, Amani.

I'm going to find your boyfriend and then he's going to pay!

GlassMammothGoat is right, Selene, your song is great!

And so is my idea for who should run in my place for school president.

Today, on the Adventures of Billie, I managed to get

out of the Greenhouse by volunteering for litter picking,

which gives us exactly one hour to find someone to run for president

and stop Blake's rise to power.

We've got the perfect candidate to defeat the Prince of Darkness.

-There she is!

-Amani!

-Good news, you're about to become the next student president.

-What?!

-We need you to run against Blake.

-I'm not going up against him!

Come on, Amani! This is a time for ordinary heroes! I'll train you.

-I can't, OK? I've got problems of my own.

-Are you OK? What's happened?

Nothing. I don't want to let you guys down, but there's no way.

Blake's been horrible to me since I got here and it's not worth it.

Oh! Cookies?

Oh! Who puts spinach in a cookie?

I really like them.

Do you think Amani's OK? She seems kind of distracted.

-She's probably sending heart-eyed smileys to Alessandro.

-Oh, yeah.

Well, this is no time for romance.

Somewhere in this school is our next president!

No. And this room is for computer-science students only.

No way! Blake's the best! He's getting us helicopter rides!

-But that's obviously a lie.

-Can't shake the Blake!

Can't shake the Blake!

-STUDENTS:

-Can't shake the Blake!

Can't shake the Blake!

Guys, I don't even go to your school any more.

We're getting kind of desperate.

We need someone to fight against the forces of evil!

Evil's kind of my thing.

Sweet! Echo posted a new vlog. I have to watch this.

-I give up, there's no-one left. ECHO:

-Hello!

-And I need to be back in the Greenhouse in five.

-It's Echo! Echo!

Wait! Who is that?

Why don't girls' clothes have pockets?

We have stuff, we have phones, we have keys.

Why am I forced to...

OMG! It's...E-Emily?

-Anna?

-I want to say Vera?

Hey...you!

-Forgotten my name, haven't you?

-No!

-OK, yes, but what if I called you Echo?

-You watch my vlogs?

-I do now.

You're an incredible speaker. Passionate, funny...

Do you mind leaving this stuff in the comments?

-I don't like human interaction.

-OK, I'll get to the point.

I want you to run for student president!

Waiting for the punch line.

Nuh-huh! I don't do public speaking.

I don't do general speaking.

This, right now, it's outside my comfort zone.

We'll support you every step of the way.

You can be a voice for the voiceless. Speak for the little guy.

Someone needs to stand up to Blake.

Enjoy this cupcake and vote Blake.

Er... We need to target the people who matter.

Don't waste those on emo losers.

Emo losers?!

-OK, I'll do it!

-Yes!

Worried you won't have anything in common to talk about at prom?

If you're not as naturally silver-tongued as me,

spend the night before researching the web.

As soon as you meet up, bombard them with constant, relentless facts.

This way, you'll appear uber-interesting, eliminating

awkward silences and any pressure to think up questions to ask them.

Boom! Job done!

Gaps in the conversation are a real date-killer, folks,

so just keep talking. Never even pausing for breath.

Art, history, personal-grooming methods.

Not too in-depth on that last one, though.