Episode 7 HH: Gory Games


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Quirky quizzes and gory games. There is nothing quite like firing a severed head from a catapult to get you in the mood for some fun.


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# If mummies, rats and fleas ain't your thing

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# And you don't like the sound of an exploding king

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# If you're easily scared and don't laugh at poo

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# You'd better turn off This show ain't for you

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# Still watching? Then let's test your brains

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# With Horrible Histories Gory Games

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# Horrible Histories Gory...Games. #

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Hello and welcome to Gory Games with me, Dave Lamb,

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and my assistant, Rattus Rattus.

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Er, before we go any further,

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can I just say that rats are known as dirty creatures

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that carry numerous highly infectious diseases,

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but, er, I have undergone rigorous checks for those diseases,

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and I can assure you I have every single one.

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Want some salmonella?

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Just keep on your side of the desk, all right, Rattus?

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Lovely.

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This is the show where you test your knowledge

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of Horrible Histories with quirky quiz questions and Gory Games.

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Before I catch anything from Rattus...

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RATTUS LAUGHS

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..let's meet today's horrible historians.

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Hello, I'm slimy Stuart Thomas.

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Hi, I'm Harriet.

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Hi, I'm Dominic.

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Woh-hoh-hoh! Look out, it's Dominic. Right, OK.

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Sorry, have you not got one of your terrible games for us at the start?

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-No, I'm spent.

-Well, good. Excellent.

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Let's get on with today's show, then.

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Oh, no, do you know what? We could play a game from ancient Greece

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that I like to call Don't Cry For Me.

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Great(!)

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This contest used to take place in front of a statue of Artemis.

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Now, Spartan boys were super tough,

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so this game is a real test of endurance.

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Basically, each of our contestants is flogged

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until they cry out in pain. Last one to cry out wins.

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-What?

-Now, right then, Dave.

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If you'd be so good as to do the flogging, cos with my little arms...

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No, no, don't panic, all right? Absolutely not.

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That is not going to happen. Not on my watch.

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You can't flog our contestants.

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-Oh, come on. I'm bringing history to life.

-Well, me, too.

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Throughout history, rats have travelled long

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distances aboard ships, just as you're about to.

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Uh-oh. Argh!

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What if I promise to behave?

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Shall we let him out?

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-Give him another chance.

-You're very lucky, Rattus.

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But I have to say, this is your very last chance.

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Again?

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Right, then. Thomas, Harriet, Dominic.

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You are playing to win Year Spheres.

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Each Year Sphere contains a historical date.

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At the end of the show, your Year Sphere dates will be added,

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with AD dates being added to your total,

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and BC dates subtracted from it.

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So, if these were your Year Spheres,

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we'd add 1,215, and then subtract 480,

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giving us a total of, Rattus?

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-Er, does it start with a seven?

-It does.

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-Does it end with a five?

-Yes.

-It has a three in the middle?

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-It has.

-Is it 24?

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It's not. It's 735.

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At the end of the show, the person with the highest year score

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will win a unique historical prize.

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Something I picked out of the Time Sewers myself.

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Something that you'll never, ever forget.

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Mainly because you'll never be able to wash off the smell.

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OK, off we go. And to find out what round one's all about,

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it's over to the Gory Grid.

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It's the Terrible Tudors.

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Your four Tudor topics are...

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So, Thomas, you get to pick first in this round. Pick away!

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Er, executions, please.

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Executions, let's hear the question.

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True or false? I cried at the execution of my wife, Anne Boleyn.

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Is that true or false?

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Everybody has gone for false. Are they all right, or all wrong?

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It's false. I wasn't even at her execution.

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In fact, people say I was busy playing tennis.

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I couldn't possibly confirm one way or the other. Naughty Henry.

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What a naughty monarch. So, Harriet, it's your turn to pick a topic.

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-Sport.

-Sport?

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It is, in fact, a prop question.

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Oh! Prop question, prop question... He's got a big stick, so shush.

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Yes, exactly. True or false?

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The Tudor sport of cudgelling involved hitting your opponent

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with a heavy stick until they bled.

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Let's see those answers now, please.

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Interesting. They've all gone for true.

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I can tell you that the answer is... true. Well done.

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The first person to make the other bleed won.

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It makes the sport of boxing look positively sensible.

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Indeed it does. Serious moment.

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Please do not try cudgelling at home.

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Dominic, your turn to choose a topic.

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Um, war.

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Let's hear that question.

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Is this true or false?

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So, is that true or is that false?

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Wow, a little bit of disagreement this time.

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Dominic and Harriet going for false, Thomas out on his own with true.

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Let's find out what the answer is.

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It's...false.

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Drake only sunk 16 Spanish ships.

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The other 60 were sunk thanks to the British weather.

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So, our lousy British weather's good for something after all.

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HE LAUGHS

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Your final category is music. Let's hear that question.

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True or false?

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I was a keen musician, and owned 78 flutes.

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Let's see those answers now, please.

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Harriet and Thomas agreeing on true.

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Dominic out on his own this time with false.

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What's the answer?

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It's true. I also owned ten trombones,

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14 trumpets, 76 recorders,

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five bagpipes, and I was a keen singer.

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-I think I'd rather listen to the bagpipes.

-I heard that.

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Oops! So, Harriet, you've won the quiz.

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Time to choose your Year Sphere. And it's pot luck.

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Pick one with a Stone Age date,

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and you could score a few million minus points.

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Pick one that the rat's touched, and you could catch salmonella.

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Oh, it's win, win, win, Harriet!

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Push, push, push, push, push. Argh, there you go.

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Come and pick your Year Sphere, any one you like.

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Interesting, maybe foolish. Push, push, push, push...

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So winning the quiz means Harriet is automatically through

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to play the Tudor Game. But will she be alone,

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or will everyone get to play? Let's find out.

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It's an All Play Brainy Game.

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So, it's off down the Time Sewer with the lot of you.

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Go on, Dominic. Lead off.

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Woh!

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I'll get you back for this, Dave.

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Queen Elizabeth I was no oil painting.

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So, when she had oil paintings done,

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she made sure the artist copied portraits from her youth,

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when she was prettier,

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rather than have them paint the rotten tooth pockmarked reality.

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It's time to play...

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Your challenge is to assemble

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two perfect copies of an Elizabeth portrait.

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The problem is, your two puzzles

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are made out of differently-shaped pieces.

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Complete your puzzles quicker than the other Horrible Historians

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to win the Year Sphere.

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In three, two, one.

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HORN BLARES

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So, here we go, then, with Puzzling Portraits, Rattus.

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Two portraits of Queen Elizabeth I, different sized pieces.

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Harriet could have the advantage here, being a girl.

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Girls tend to do well at this, I find.

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It's multi-skilling allows them to do that, I think.

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I think you're absolutely right.

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It's a cagey opening from Dominic, too. He's having a good look.

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You don't want to go just charging in there, do you, Rattus?

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Popping stuff down, willy-nilly.

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No, that's not a good way to start at all.

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Well, look at this.

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Harriet does seem to be doing rather well,

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working on two puzzles at once, of course.

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Dominic very different in his tactics, there.

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He's trying to complete one first,

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and then move onto the second.

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Two very different approaches.

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I will say that Harriet seems to be doing incredibly well now.

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Thomas is going to have to go some to win it from here.

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That looks like someone in a hall of mirrors.

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But Harriet, look at her, taking her time.

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Composure personified, isn't she, Rattus?

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Certainly is. Have you ever noticed what a shifty-looking queen

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Elizabeth I is?

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She really looks like she's up to something in that portrait.

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Well, I'm glad YOU said that because, of course,

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her distant relative Elizabeth II, still very much alive.

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If she happened to be watching,

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that could be trouble for you, Rattus. Big trouble.

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She's just as shifty-looking.

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He said it again there, Ma'am.

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I want to make it clear that's not my opinion.

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But in the meantime, Harriet is doing extremely well here.

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She's only got a couple of pieces remaining.

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It's looking very, very good for Harriet.

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Yes. It's all over. Two portraits completed, and there she is.

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Double single-digit salute.

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Oh, Harriet is someone who knows how to celebrate!

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Harriet, go and pick up your Year Sphere. Well done.

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Was it not complicated for you doing them both at the same time?

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I've had a lot of experience with 750-piece puzzles.

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Right. And this was only about 20 pieces with the two of them,

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wasn't it? On to round two.

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To find out what's up next, it's over to the Gory Grid.

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It's the Rotten Romans.

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And here are your four Roman topics.

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So, Harriet, it's your turn to pick first this time.

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What's it going to be?

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-Toothpaste.

-Toothpaste?!

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What did we Romans use for toothpaste?

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A, powdered rat brains?

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B, powdered mouse brains?

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Or C, powdered crocodile skin?

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Let's see those answers now, please.

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Interesting. Everybody has gone for B. Are they all right, or all wrong?

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The answer is B. Powdered mouse brains.

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Minty-fresh and squeaky clean!

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Obviously, a powdered rat brain would be absolutely no use at all.

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Far too small.

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Right, Dominic. Your turn to pick a topic.

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Um, Emperors.

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Emperors. Let's hear that question.

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Emperor Caligula was very hairy, and was said to look like which animal?

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Let's have a look at those answers.

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Everybody has gone for A! Let's see if they're right.

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The answer is B, a goat.

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Caligula was quite touchy about it.

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If you said the word "goat" in his presence,

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he would have you executed.

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Of course, being told you looked like a rat would just be a compliment.

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Hm, in your dreams. Right, Thomas your turn to pick.

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-Punishments.

-Punishments.

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What was the Roman punishment for killing your own father?

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Was it being A, thrown off a cliff?

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B, fed to the lions?

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Or C, tied in a sack with wild animals and thrown in a river?

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-You're smiling Dominic, do you think you know this one?

-Yeah.

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Excellent. Good. Let's have some answers.

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Well, the boys agreeing on C. Harriet on her own, with A.

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What's the answer?

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The answer is C. You were tied in a sack with wild animals

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and thrown in a river.

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Usually with a snake, a cockerel, a monkey and a dog.

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Well, that seems desperately unfair.

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Had the animals killed their own fathers as well?

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-I don't imagine so.

-Oh!

-Just a bit of bad luck for them.

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So, the final question this round is on cabbages.

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And it is a prop question.

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Oh, prop question, prop question, prop question.

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A Roman cure for feeling unwell

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involved eating cabbage for a day, and then what?

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Was it A, eating nothing else for a week?

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B, making yourself sick it all up again?

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Or C, collecting and drinking your own cabbage-y wee?

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-HE LAUGHS

-Let's see those answers now, please.

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The boys agreeing on C. Harriet on her own with B.

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The answer is, C. Of course it is!

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They'd collect and drink their own cabbage-y wee.

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So, a point each for the boys.

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Thomas and Dominic, it's fingers-on-buzzers time.

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We're going to have the tiebreak question.

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Beginning with the letter T,

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what item of clothing was worn by posh men in Rome?

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-FLUSHING

-Yes, Dominic?

-Toga.

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Toga is absolutely right.

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Go and collect your first Year Sphere.

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Dominic, you're through to play the Roman Game, but will it be

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an All Play or a Single Player game? Let's find out now.

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It's an All Play Gory Game,

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so that means it's back off down the Time Sewer with the lot of you.

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There's really not much you could teach the Romans about sieges,

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apart from maybe the concept of playing fair, because the Romans

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just loved to catapult awful things at enemy fortresses.

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It's time to play...

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They'd fire rocks, beehives, even severed heads of captured defenders.

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Your challenge is to fire as many missiles

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into your fortress target as possible.

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The person who gets the most in the time limit wins the Year Sphere.

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So, catapults at the ready. In three, two, one.

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HORN BLARES

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So it's Savage Siege. They've all gone for a rock, first up.

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Let's see how they go with these.

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Bang one, bang two! Can he make it a hat trick?

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No, he can't. Oh, that was a shame.

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That was a very exciting start, wasn't it, Rattus?

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-Rattus?

-Certainly was, Dave. A very exciting start...

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Yes, and there it is. There's the third stone in, it is a hat trick.

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And the first beehive going in, in the middle there.

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Harriet, using a beehive. There's a decapitated head.

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Beautiful technique from Dominic. Oh, what style he has.

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Just watch this.

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He pulls, and a little leap, as if he's putting top spin on it.

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Meanwhile, though, Harriet into the lead.

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Wonderful, with four points already.

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Thomas straight back at her, with three.

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Look at Harriet wrestle with the decapitated head.

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It's probably got blood on her hand, there.

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Not very pleasant. And one goes sailing over the top there.

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Huh, Thomas literally doesn't know his own strength on the end.

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I don't know the difference between rocks and boulders, Dave.

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Is it an international issue, or...?

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It's a highly technical difference. I won't trouble you with it now.

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Suffice to say, there is a difference.

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It's just very, very small.

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Thomas and Harriet level pegging, five points apiece.

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And here comes Dominic. He's making his way back.

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30 seconds left.

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If he could land this, it would help him. He's not quite done it.

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30 seconds remaining.

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It's neck-and-neck.

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And here comes Dominic, too.

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It really is very close.

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Oh, that one bounces in nicely there for Thomas.

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He's in the lead at a crucial stage.

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Oh, and another severed head hits its mark there.

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It may be a severed head but at least he gets to travel.

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There are seconds remaining here. It's looking like it's Thomas's.

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No, it's not Thomas!

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HOOTER BLARES

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Harriet has tied it at the last second.

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What a shot that was! Thomas and Harriet getting a sphere each.

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Thomas, you go first and select yours, please.

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Look at that. Cautious selection.

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And Harriet, help yourself to your third.

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Those weren't the only terrible tactics the Romans used.

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They'd also dump dead animals into their enemy's water supply,

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so they'd fall ill.

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Because sick soldiers are much easier to defeat than healthy ones.

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Oh, that's weird.

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In my experience, rotting animals just make things taste better.

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Which is why, to this day,

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I have never agreed to come round to yours for dinner.

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Over to the Gory Grid to find out what's up next.

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It's the Vile Victorians. Good day!

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And here are your all-important Victorian topics.

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So Dominic, it's your turn

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-to lead us off this time. What's it going to be?

-Factories.

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Factories. Let's hear that question.

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True or false? In some factories, managers would alter the clock

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so you'd be late for work.

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Everybody thinks it's true. Let's find out.

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It's true. It happened to me,

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and then the bosses fined me thruppence for being late.

0:16:100:16:13

Where am I supposed to find that kind of money from?

0:16:130:16:16

That's what I get paid for doing the show.

0:16:160:16:18

That, and all the canteen waste I can eat.

0:16:180:16:20

Lovely. Thomas, it's your turn to pick a topic.

0:16:200:16:24

Um, gadgets, please.

0:16:240:16:25

Gadgets.

0:16:250:16:27

That is a prop question.

0:16:270:16:30

Get a load of that. True or false?

0:16:300:16:33

This was a Victorian device for automatically making you

0:16:330:16:37

a cup of tea in the morning.

0:16:370:16:38

You've all gone for true. Well done, you're all absolutely right.

0:16:400:16:43

It's absolutely true.

0:16:430:16:44

You set the time on the clock and have a nice brew in the morning.

0:16:440:16:47

So, two points apiece. Harriet, your turn to pick a topic.

0:16:470:16:50

-Cats.

-Cats.

0:16:500:16:53

And that is a question from Mr Rattus Rattus.

0:16:530:16:57

True or false?

0:16:570:16:59

Victorian scientist Charles Babbage

0:16:590:17:02

got a law passed

0:17:020:17:04

stopping street performers because they were too noisy.

0:17:040:17:07

So some street protestors threw dead cats at him.

0:17:070:17:10

Is that true, or is that false?

0:17:100:17:13

Interesting. Everybody has gone for false. Rattus, what's the answer?

0:17:130:17:18

It's true. So, they were bad protestors, but good cats.

0:17:180:17:23

That's because I think the only good cat is a dead cat.

0:17:230:17:27

Yes, can I just apologise for the fact that my co-presenter is a rat?

0:17:270:17:31

HE LAUGHS

0:17:310:17:32

Final question, this round. The question is on eccentrics.

0:17:320:17:36

Let's hear what it is.

0:17:360:17:38

Is this true or false?

0:17:380:17:41

Let's see those answers now, please.

0:17:470:17:49

Oh, total agreement, once again! Everybody's gone for false

0:17:490:17:53

Let's find out.

0:17:530:17:54

It's...false.

0:17:540:17:57

Yes, his carriage was actually pulled by zebras.

0:17:570:18:00

I wonder if he stopped or crossed at a zebra crossing?

0:18:000:18:03

Interesting. I'll get back to you on that one.

0:18:030:18:07

So, it's a three way tie, which means fingers on buzzers, please.

0:18:070:18:10

Beginning with the letter H, what was the surname

0:18:100:18:12

of the famous detective created by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.

0:18:120:18:16

-Sherlock...?

-FLUSHING

0:18:160:18:17

-Dominic?

-Holmes.

0:18:170:18:19

Holmes is absolutely right. Well done, Dominic.

0:18:190:18:21

Help yourself to another Year Sphere.

0:18:210:18:24

OK, Dominic is the quiz winner.

0:18:240:18:27

He's through to play the Victorian Game. Will it be just him,

0:18:270:18:30

or will the others get to play, too? Let's find out.

0:18:300:18:32

It's a Single Player Brainy Game.

0:18:360:18:39

So, Dominic, engage the old grey matter,

0:18:390:18:43

and get yourself down that Time Sewer.

0:18:430:18:46

Isambard Kingdom Brunel

0:18:460:18:47

was a brilliant professional engineer,

0:18:470:18:50

but a rubbish amateur magician.

0:18:500:18:51

He once made a coin disappear, but not quite how he planned.

0:18:510:18:54

He managed to get the coin lodged in his windpipe.

0:18:540:18:57

He eventually dislodged it using a clever device.

0:18:570:19:00

It's time to play...

0:19:000:19:02

Your challenge is to work out which cog goes where.

0:19:040:19:06

Once they're all in the right place, you can turn the wheel

0:19:060:19:09

and flip the idiot, I mean patient, upside down,

0:19:090:19:11

to dislodge the coin and win your Year Sphere.

0:19:110:19:14

But be quick, you're against the clock. Which is starting to tick

0:19:140:19:18

and also to tock. Now.

0:19:180:19:20

HOOTER BLARES

0:19:200:19:21

Here goes Dominic with Barmy Brunel.

0:19:210:19:24

That's a tiny little cog. That's no use.

0:19:240:19:26

That won't work, Dominic. But he's quickly worked that out.

0:19:260:19:28

I like that about this lad.

0:19:280:19:30

He works things out quickly, doesn't he, Rattus?

0:19:300:19:32

He's certainly considering each cog in turn, Dave.

0:19:320:19:35

Yeah, that's the way to do this. It's trial and error,

0:19:350:19:38

and again he's understood that is just too small for that slot.

0:19:380:19:41

So, well played, Dominic. Lovely.

0:19:410:19:44

That is a likely-looking cog, for me.

0:19:440:19:47

That's going to slot neatly in there, next to the crank cog.

0:19:470:19:49

There it is. Beautiful, the first cog in place.

0:19:490:19:51

What's he going to do now, Rattus?

0:19:510:19:53

He'll try another cog,

0:19:530:19:55

as that's the fundamental principle of the game.

0:19:550:19:57

Well, very good. Well done.

0:19:570:19:59

I think Brunel seems to be asleep.

0:19:590:20:01

Let's hope he's not choking too badly, of course.

0:20:010:20:04

The coin currently lodged in his throat.

0:20:040:20:07

Let's hope he's still alive,

0:20:070:20:08

because Dominic's taking his time, as he should.

0:20:080:20:12

But it's time well spent, I have to say that.

0:20:120:20:16

There's another likely-looking cog.

0:20:160:20:19

That's large enough to fit in there, for me.

0:20:190:20:22

Oh, it's not quite large enough. Well, this is the game, you see.

0:20:220:20:25

He's working his way methodically through, and I think inevitably

0:20:250:20:28

he'll do it, because he's got enough time left, hasn't he Rattus?

0:20:280:20:31

He has plenty of time.

0:20:310:20:33

Just one cog remaining now. One cog between Brunel and safety.

0:20:330:20:37

There goes a tiny little one. And it's working, and there goes Brunel!

0:20:370:20:42

He's flipped up, the coins in the roof of his mouth, and he's got it.

0:20:420:20:46

-Yes!

-Dominic has the saliva-covered coin. He is a life saver.

0:20:460:20:51

Well done, Dominic. Help yourself to another Year Sphere.

0:20:510:20:55

Isambard Brunel was probably the greatest Victorian engineer,

0:20:560:21:00

famous for designing bridges, railways and steamships.

0:21:000:21:03

People called him, "The Little Giant",

0:21:030:21:05

because the great man was only five foot tall.

0:21:050:21:07

Thereby proving great things come in small packages.

0:21:070:21:10

Sometimes.

0:21:100:21:12

Over to the Gory Grid one last time, to find out who we've got.

0:21:120:21:15

It's the measly Middle Ages.

0:21:150:21:19

So, no quirky quiz in our final round.

0:21:190:21:23

It's straight to our big All Play Middle Ages game,

0:21:230:21:26

and it is a very messy one.

0:21:260:21:27

So, come on, everyone, get down that Time Sewer.

0:21:270:21:31

I was beginning to get used to the smell!

0:21:360:21:39

Well, Thomas might be used to the smell of the Time Sewer,

0:21:390:21:42

but I can smell something disgusting.

0:21:420:21:45

And for once, I don't think it's Rattus.

0:21:450:21:47

Which can mean only one thing. Let's have a go at....

0:21:470:21:51

Gong was a Middle Ages word for poop.

0:21:530:21:56

Your job is to collect the gong from the cesspit,

0:21:560:21:58

carry it along your lane, and slop it into your measuring cylinder.

0:21:580:22:02

Whoever collects the most, collects the Year Sphere. But beware.

0:22:020:22:05

Some Middles Ages types would poo directly onto the street below,

0:22:050:22:09

so your lane is going to get very, very slippery.

0:22:090:22:13

Ready, steady, get slopping.

0:22:130:22:16

HOOTER BLARES

0:22:160:22:18

Here we go, then, with gong farming. And Thomas is off to a flyer.

0:22:180:22:22

He's got down to his bucket of poo first.

0:22:220:22:25

There we go.

0:22:250:22:26

They've all got a good bucketful there, Dave.

0:22:260:22:29

They have. They have to make their way very carefully,

0:22:290:22:31

cos once the lane becomes slippery,

0:22:310:22:33

it's very difficult to deal with. Oh, dear me!

0:22:330:22:35

Thomas is down already,

0:22:350:22:38

and that could be disastrous for Thomas.

0:22:380:22:40

I'm sorry, you do not want a wet lane

0:22:400:22:43

at this stage of proceedings. And his trousers are soaking.

0:22:430:22:47

He can barely stand up. He's all over the shop.

0:22:470:22:50

It's no good, Dave, and there's laughter. He's smiling.

0:22:500:22:53

I think he's really lost his impetus.

0:22:530:22:56

He's just enjoying rolling around in poop.

0:22:560:23:00

Yeah, and why wouldn't he? Why wouldn't he?!

0:23:000:23:02

Meanwhile, Harriet is getting on with the game.

0:23:020:23:04

And look at that, that's a full bag's worth she's delivered there.

0:23:040:23:08

And so has Dominic. That's an impressive score.

0:23:080:23:11

That's two full buckets of poop she's managed to get across already.

0:23:110:23:16

Yes, and Thomas is desperately trying to stand up.

0:23:160:23:19

It's not working for him. I think he's going to throw that bucket.

0:23:190:23:22

That is desperation at this stage of the game,

0:23:220:23:26

to be throwing your bucket at the measuring cylinder.

0:23:260:23:29

He's missed by a considerable distance.

0:23:290:23:32

Wouldn't have mattered if it had hit it, Dave.

0:23:320:23:34

It had nothing in it! It was an empty bucket.

0:23:340:23:37

As indeed is Harriet's.

0:23:370:23:39

She's just delivered another massive payload, and so too has Dominic.

0:23:390:23:43

They're both doing incredibly well. Thomas isn't.

0:23:430:23:45

Lord alone knows what will happen

0:23:450:23:47

when the poo drops from above, which it surely will, fairly soon.

0:23:470:23:51

He's absolutely struggling.

0:23:510:23:53

Forlornly takes his bucket back to the other end,

0:23:530:23:56

having emptied precisely... There goes the poo!

0:23:560:23:59

And if we thought he was in trouble before,

0:23:590:24:02

boy, oh, boy, is he in trouble now? They all are.

0:24:020:24:05

There may not be much more poo scored in those measuring cylinders

0:24:050:24:08

from this point on.

0:24:080:24:09

Because it's going to get terribly heavy underfoot, I think.

0:24:090:24:12

And there he is, plucky Thomas.

0:24:120:24:15

He hasn't moved for the best part of this game.

0:24:150:24:17

Harriet is now covered in quite a lot of poo, herself.

0:24:170:24:20

Now, this is clever.

0:24:200:24:22

Dominic is either attempting to make a run for it,

0:24:220:24:25

or he's using the side of his lane to make his way back.

0:24:250:24:28

They're running out of time,

0:24:280:24:29

and Thomas falls over for the 73rd time during this game.

0:24:290:24:33

-HORN BLARES

-Time's up.

0:24:330:24:35

And it really is all over now, and Harriet has collected the most poo.

0:24:350:24:40

And Thomas has done absolutely nothing.

0:24:400:24:44

Unless you count rolling around, falling over, and laughing.

0:24:440:24:48

Back behind those podiums. Thomas, talk us through that.

0:24:480:24:53

Well, I ran back. Slipped. Poo everywhere.

0:24:530:24:57

And then I was slipping and sliding about for the rest of the event.

0:24:570:25:01

But your measuring cylinder was absolutely bone dry.

0:25:010:25:05

I don't think I've ever seen a more messy contestant.

0:25:050:25:08

You were rolling around in poo from start to finish.

0:25:080:25:11

So help yourself to another Year Sphere, Harriet.

0:25:110:25:13

Hm, choices, choices.

0:25:130:25:16

Is that a good one, or is it a bad one?

0:25:160:25:19

Time to count up those Year Spheres.

0:25:190:25:21

AD years are added to your total,

0:25:210:25:23

and BC years are subtracted from it.

0:25:230:25:26

Thomas, let's have a look at it.

0:25:260:25:28

What is it?

0:25:280:25:30

Oh, Thomas!

0:25:300:25:31

It's 305 BC.

0:25:310:25:34

Alexander the Great conquered Egypt that year.

0:25:340:25:37

That leaves you with a minus score.

0:25:370:25:39

Harriet. Let's start with yours.

0:25:390:25:40

1840 AD. Queen Victoria married Price Albert.

0:25:400:25:45

Let's have a look at the second one.

0:25:450:25:47

1492 AD.

0:25:470:25:49

Christopher Columbus discovered the New World. And the third.

0:25:490:25:53

1665 AD.

0:25:530:25:56

The Plague happened round about then.

0:25:560:25:58

Let's have a look at your final sphere.

0:25:580:26:00

It's another AD. 1805 AD. The Battle of Trafalgar.

0:26:000:26:04

That has given you a very, very impressive total, indeed.

0:26:040:26:08

You've ended up with 6,802.

0:26:080:26:13

-So, Dominic. That is your total to beat.

-Oh!

0:26:130:26:17

1415 AD.

0:26:190:26:21

Henry V beat the French at Agincourt.

0:26:210:26:22

Let's have a look at that second one.

0:26:220:26:25

I think is going to be a BC.

0:26:250:26:27

Well, you're wrong. It's 978 AD.

0:26:270:26:30

Ethelred the Unready became king of England that year.

0:26:300:26:34

Let's look at your final sphere.

0:26:340:26:36

Oh, it's a BC, but it's not disastrous.

0:26:360:26:39

It's 449 BC.

0:26:390:26:41

Sea battle of Salamis, between the Greeks and the Persians.

0:26:410:26:44

Which means you're comfortably in second place with 1,944.

0:26:440:26:48

So, all that means that today's winner,

0:26:480:26:51

with a score of 6,802,

0:26:510:26:54

is Harriet.

0:26:540:26:55

Congratulations, Harriet.

0:26:550:26:57

You go home with our star prize.

0:26:570:27:00

The kind of prize you could only win on this show.

0:27:000:27:04

Because, sadly, it's just some old rubbish that

0:27:040:27:06

Rattus has fished out of the Time Sewers.

0:27:060:27:08

Come on, Rattus. Do your worst.

0:27:080:27:09

Well, when it comes to Vikings,

0:27:090:27:11

everyone always remembers the killing, burning, and pillaging

0:27:110:27:15

And they forget about all the really important stuff,

0:27:150:27:18

like how they had excellent ear hygiene.

0:27:180:27:21

To prove it, today's prize is a genuine Viking ear spoon.

0:27:210:27:26

Rattus, tell me you've at least cleared out the ear wax.

0:27:260:27:29

Of course I have, Dave!

0:27:290:27:31

Viking ear wax is delicious!

0:27:310:27:33

Pt-pt-pt-pt.

0:27:330:27:35

There you go, Harriet. I hope you enjoy it.

0:27:350:27:38

It just remains for me to say thanks

0:27:380:27:41

to Thomas, Harriet and Dominic.

0:27:410:27:43

And no thanks whatsoever to Rattus.

0:27:430:27:45

I like to serve.

0:27:450:27:47

You've been watching Gory Games. Goodbye.

0:27:470:27:49

# Was that show messy enough for you?

0:27:490:27:52

# Or would you have preferred a little more poo?

0:27:520:27:56

# Have you had your fill of blood, guts and gore?

0:27:560:27:59

# Or have we left you still wanting more?

0:27:590:28:02

# Well, keep watching We'll be back again

0:28:020:28:06

# With Horrible Histories Gory Games

0:28:060:28:09

# Horrible Histories Gory...Games. #

0:28:090:28:12

There is nothing quite like firing a severed head from a catapult to get you in the mood for some fun! The Roman Savage Siege is in full swing in this episode, along with one of Rattus' other favourites: Tudor Gong Farming - all that poop!