Episode 3 HH: Gory Games


Episode 3

Quirky quizzes and gory games. Sam, Noah and Chiedza battle it out to win Year Spheres in games including Space Race and Lootin-khamun.


Similar Content

Browse content similar to Episode 3. Check below for episodes and series from the same categories and more!

Transcript


LineFromTo

-Psst! Psst!

-What's that noise?

0:00:020:00:03

Rattus, you're not having a wee, are you?

0:00:030:00:06

No, I'm psst-ing you because it means it's secret.

0:00:060:00:09

I'm offering you the chance to invest

0:00:090:00:11

in my top-secret business venture.

0:00:110:00:14

Oh, oh, let me have a think about that. No!

0:00:140:00:17

What if I told you, you were going to be the centrepiece of my

0:00:170:00:21

new star-studded celeb museum?

0:00:210:00:23

Hm! What, a bit like Madame Tussauds?

0:00:230:00:25

Yeah, a bit like it.

0:00:250:00:27

Think about it - crowds of adoring tourists taking selfies

0:00:270:00:31

with your gorgeous look-alike.

0:00:310:00:33

-Really?

-Hm.

0:00:330:00:34

-I'd be the star attraction?

-Mm-hm.

0:00:340:00:37

OK, I'm in!

0:00:370:00:38

You won't regret it.

0:00:380:00:40

# If mummies, rats and fleas ain't your thing

0:00:420:00:45

# And you don't like the sound of an exploding king

0:00:450:00:48

# If you're easily scared and you don't laugh at poo

0:00:480:00:51

# You'd better turn off This show ain't for you

0:00:510:00:54

# Still watching?

0:00:540:00:55

-BOTH:

-# Then let's test your brains

0:00:550:00:58

# With Horrible Histories: Gory Games

0:00:580:01:01

# Horrible Histories: Gory

0:01:010:01:04

# Games. #

0:01:040:01:05

Hello, and welcome to Gory Games

0:01:050:01:07

with me David Rat.

0:01:070:01:08

And me, Lambus Lambus.

0:01:080:01:10

Or something like that, anyway.

0:01:100:01:13

Let's meet our horrible historians.

0:01:130:01:15

Hi, I'm Sam and I'm from Woking.

0:01:150:01:17

Hi, I'm Noah.

0:01:190:01:22

Hi, I'm Chiedza and I'm from Staffordshire.

0:01:220:01:24

Welcome, everyone.

0:01:280:01:30

Right, you lot are playing to win Year Spheres.

0:01:300:01:32

The person with the highest score at the end of the show will win

0:01:320:01:35

a prize fished out of the Time Sewer by Rattus.

0:01:350:01:38

-So good, they named me twice.

-Indeed.

0:01:380:01:42

Time to crack on with round one.

0:01:420:01:43

Let's find out what it is all about by going over to the Gory Grid.

0:01:430:01:46

It's the Terrible Tudors.

0:01:490:01:51

So, four questions on the Terrible Tudors coming up.

0:01:510:01:53

The person who gets the most right wins the first Year Sphere.

0:01:530:01:57

And your four Terrible Tudors topics are...

0:01:570:02:00

So, Sam, it's your turn to pick first in this opening round.

0:02:060:02:09

-Which one do you fancy?

-I'm going to go with Executions, please.

0:02:090:02:13

I thought you might, Sam. Let's hear that question.

0:02:130:02:16

What weapon was used to execute Anne Boleyn?

0:02:160:02:19

Was it...?

0:02:190:02:20

Show me now, please.

0:02:260:02:27

What's the answer?

0:02:270:02:29

The answer is...

0:02:290:02:30

Yeah!

0:02:330:02:34

Henry VIII brought an expert French swordsman over from Calais to

0:02:340:02:38

ensure Anne's execution was as swift and painless as possible.

0:02:380:02:42

Oh, that Henry, he was all heart, wasn't he?

0:02:420:02:46

Wasn't he just?

0:02:460:02:47

And that trademark Sam celebration tells us that he is off the mark.

0:02:470:02:52

Congratulations, Sam. Noah, what's your topic?

0:02:520:02:54

Barbers.

0:02:540:02:56

That is the question, sadly, from Rattus Rattus.

0:02:560:02:59

Besides cutting hair, what else were Tudor barbers qualified to perform?

0:02:590:03:03

Was it...?

0:03:030:03:05

Let's have a look at those answers. Wow!

0:03:100:03:12

Total agreement this time.

0:03:120:03:14

What's the answer, Rattus?

0:03:140:03:15

Oh, I'm afraid...

0:03:150:03:16

They are absolutely right! It is, indeed, C.

0:03:160:03:19

Tudor barbers were also surgeons.

0:03:190:03:20

Amazing.

0:03:200:03:21

"I'd like a short back and sides and a kidney replacement, please."

0:03:210:03:26

"Did you do anything nice for your holidays?"

0:03:260:03:28

Crikey!

0:03:280:03:30

OK, so that's points all round.

0:03:300:03:32

Congratulations, congratulations, congratulations.

0:03:320:03:35

Chiedza, your turn to pick.

0:03:350:03:36

Cures, please.

0:03:360:03:38

A Tudor cure for deafness was to put what in your ear?

0:03:380:03:42

Show me now, please.

0:03:540:03:56

Ooh! Sam and Noah agree on B.

0:03:560:03:58

What's the answer, please?

0:03:580:04:00

-SHOUTS:

-The answer is B!

0:04:000:04:02

Sorry, am I shouting?

0:04:030:04:05

I can't hear a thing,

0:04:050:04:06

my ears are full of hare gallbladders and fox fat.

0:04:060:04:10

Well, if you weren't deaf before the cure, you sure were after.

0:04:100:04:14

Sam and Noah, another point apiece.

0:04:140:04:17

The last question is on Salt.

0:04:170:04:19

Why did we Tudors often throw salt over our left shoulder

0:04:190:04:23

before eating? Was it...?

0:04:230:04:25

Show me now, please.

0:04:340:04:35

Let's hear the answer.

0:04:370:04:38

The answer is...

0:04:380:04:40

We Tudors believed that the Devil sat on your left shoulder

0:04:430:04:45

and we'd throw salt over it to blind him.

0:04:450:04:48

I mean, you'd be crazy not to!

0:04:480:04:50

You would be crazy not to

0:04:500:04:52

and you'd be crazy not to admire Sam's full house!

0:04:520:04:56

CHEERING Superb work and superbly celebrated.

0:04:560:04:59

Sam, you have won the quiz,

0:04:590:05:01

which means it is time for you to choose your Year Sphere

0:05:010:05:04

and that means it's time for me to say -

0:05:040:05:07

all hail the Potty Pyramid.

0:05:070:05:12

Help yourself, Sam, to a Year Sphere.

0:05:140:05:17

Choose wisely, though, because AD dates will be added

0:05:170:05:20

to your total, but, of course, BC dates will be subtracted from it.

0:05:200:05:24

We will find out what's inside that sphere later on.

0:05:240:05:27

So, winning the Tudor quiz means that Sam is automatically through

0:05:270:05:31

to play the Tudor game,

0:05:310:05:32

but will he be alone or will the others get to play too?

0:05:320:05:35

Let's find out.

0:05:350:05:36

It's an all-player game.

0:05:400:05:41

So, off down the Time Sewer, with the lot of you, please.

0:05:410:05:44

-Bye, Chiedza.

-Bye.

-See you, Noah.

0:05:450:05:48

Henry VIII may have been a mighty and powerful king,

0:05:500:05:52

but he couldn't go to the toilet without assistance.

0:05:520:05:55

Yes, it is time to play...

0:05:550:05:57

Being the groom of the stool wasn't for the faint-hearted.

0:05:590:06:02

When Henry calls, you have to rush to check his poop.

0:06:020:06:05

In the meantime, brick up the doorway to keep him

0:06:050:06:07

safe from assassins.

0:06:070:06:08

First to brick it up wins the Year Sphere.

0:06:080:06:11

KLAXON BLOWS

0:06:130:06:15

So, everyone rushes back to their pile of bricks.

0:06:150:06:18

They each have one piece in place.

0:06:180:06:19

We've given them that, but that is all the help they will get.

0:06:190:06:22

And then after that, they're going to have to get their hands dirty.

0:06:220:06:24

Really, really dirty.

0:06:240:06:26

-Oh, I'm so jealous!

-I bet you are.

0:06:260:06:28

Well, they are all working on the largest piece,

0:06:280:06:30

that seems to be sensible. Chiedza is off to an absolute flyer.

0:06:300:06:33

-HENRY:

-I'm finished!

-Oh, no. Here it comes.

0:06:330:06:35

Oh, yes, here it comes.

0:06:350:06:37

Oh, this is so disgusting. Did you invent this game, Rattus?

0:06:370:06:41

You know, it is actually a traditional rat party game,

0:06:410:06:44

only we don't bother with building a wall.

0:06:440:06:45

Oh, crikey.

0:06:450:06:47

Sam, you have to say, is struggling a wee bit here,

0:06:470:06:49

but Noah and Chiedza are getting very close indeed.

0:06:490:06:52

I hope nothing distracts them, because this could be it.

0:06:520:06:54

We might not have to see any more poo.

0:06:540:06:56

-HENRY:

-I'm finished!

0:06:560:06:58

Oh, no.

0:06:580:07:00

The groom of the stool was actually well-paid to inspect poo, you know?

0:07:000:07:03

Imagine that, getting paid to do your hobby! Brilliant!

0:07:030:07:06

Everyone is right back into it. This is incredibly close.

0:07:060:07:08

I think Chiedza may just have the edge.

0:07:080:07:11

I think she's got one more piece to go.

0:07:110:07:13

But so has Noah, but Chiedza is going to get there first.

0:07:130:07:15

It's going to be very tight. Who is going to get it?

0:07:150:07:18

Chiedza wins it.

0:07:180:07:19

That's lovely stuff.

0:07:190:07:21

What did she make of that, besides from a wall, of course?

0:07:210:07:23

I found it quite fun actually because of the poo bit.

0:07:230:07:27

Any advice for Henry, boys?

0:07:270:07:29

I would tell Henry VIII to have a balanced diet with meat

0:07:290:07:33

and vegetables.

0:07:330:07:35

Go on a diet for nine years or so.

0:07:350:07:37

Welcome back, everybody. Welcome back. Congratulations, Chiedza.

0:07:380:07:43

Collect yourself a Year Sphere. What's in there?

0:07:430:07:46

We will find out later.

0:07:460:07:48

So, how is our celebrity museum coming along, then, Rattus?

0:07:480:07:52

Oh, great. Really great. I've learned from the best.

0:07:520:07:55

Madame Tussaud.

0:07:550:07:57

THE Madame Tussaud, from the French Revolution?

0:07:570:08:00

-Uh-huh.

-Well, she used to take the severed heads of nobles

0:08:000:08:03

killed by the guillotine and then cast their faces in wax.

0:08:030:08:06

I hope you're not planning to do that.

0:08:060:08:08

No, no, no.

0:08:080:08:09

I'm not using wax.

0:08:090:08:11

-So what, then?

-Take a look.

0:08:110:08:12

Welcome to Madam Poosauds!

0:08:160:08:19

Who is that meant to be?

0:08:210:08:22

Na-POO-leon. Isn't it obvious?

0:08:220:08:25

Admittedly, it does look a bit like Henry number two.

0:08:250:08:27

Oh, all right. On with the show. I think I'm going to move this.

0:08:270:08:31

Oh, I wish I hadn't touched that.

0:08:310:08:34

Wet wipe?

0:08:340:08:36

Going to take more than a wet wipe to sort that lot out.

0:08:360:08:38

On to round two.

0:08:380:08:40

And to find out what's up next, it is over to the Gory Grid.

0:08:400:08:42

It's the Awful Egyptians.

0:08:440:08:48

And here are your all-important Awful Egyptian topics.

0:08:480:08:51

So, Noah, it's your turn to pick first this time.

0:08:560:08:59

I'm going to go with Gods.

0:08:590:09:01

Worship of the crocodile god started with the priest

0:09:010:09:06

re-enacting the pharaoh doing what?

0:09:060:09:08

Let's see those answers, please.

0:09:140:09:16

Total disagreement.

0:09:160:09:18

What is the answer.

0:09:180:09:19

The answer is...

0:09:190:09:21

The priest re-enacted the pharaoh going to the toilet.

0:09:220:09:26

HE LAUGHS

0:09:260:09:28

Hey, that's so funny, I've just re-enacted me going to the toilet.

0:09:280:09:32

Oh!

0:09:320:09:34

Big Tony, can I have a mop?

0:09:340:09:37

-Thank you.

-Oh, it's all dripping down the back.

0:09:370:09:39

Oh, dear me.

0:09:390:09:41

The priest was actually re-enacting pharaoh's full washing ritual.

0:09:410:09:44

Keep mopping, slave!

0:09:440:09:47

Thanks, Tone.

0:09:490:09:50

So, that's a point for you, Sam. Chiedza, it is returned to pick.

0:09:520:09:55

Can I have cats, please?

0:09:550:09:56

The punishment for killing a cat in ancient Egypt was...?

0:09:560:09:59

Let's have a look at those answers.

0:10:060:10:08

Who is right?

0:10:080:10:10

The answer is...

0:10:100:10:12

If you killed the cat, you were put to death!

0:10:150:10:17

Quite right too.

0:10:170:10:19

Cats are sacred.

0:10:190:10:20

Yeah, in rat lore, if you kill a cat, you're given a medal.

0:10:200:10:24

Just saying.

0:10:240:10:26

So, Sam, another point for you.

0:10:260:10:27

You have yet to get a question wrong in this show.

0:10:270:10:30

I don't want to talk about maximums, but, you know, it's in the air.

0:10:300:10:34

-Sam, it's your turn to pick.

-I'm going to go with Cures, please.

0:10:340:10:38

Cures. That unfortunately for you is a question from Rattus Rattus.

0:10:380:10:42

An ancient Egyptian cure for earache involved burning

0:10:420:10:45

frog bone, tortoiseshell and what else?

0:10:450:10:49

Show me those answers please.

0:10:570:10:58

-What's the answer, Rattus?

-The answer is...

0:11:000:11:03

Crocodile poo, tortoiseshell and frog bone where burned

0:11:030:11:07

and the smoke was wafted into the ear.

0:11:070:11:09

HE LAUGHS

0:11:090:11:11

-Yeah, I've got a good cure for an earache.

-What's that, Dave?

0:11:110:11:15

Ah, that's better already. MUFFLED SPEECH

0:11:160:11:19

HE SPITS

0:11:190:11:20

Noah, congratulations. A point on the board for you.

0:11:200:11:23

Teeth is the final category in this round.

0:11:230:11:26

What did we ancient Egyptians believe caused tooth decay?

0:11:260:11:30

Show me those answers now.

0:11:350:11:37

Complete spread of answers there.

0:11:380:11:39

No-one agreeing with each other whatsoever.

0:11:390:11:41

What's the answer?

0:11:410:11:44

The answer is...

0:11:440:11:45

The ancient Egyptians believed tooth decay was caused by worms

0:11:460:11:50

living within the mouth.

0:11:500:11:52

Have I got any?

0:11:530:11:55

So, Noah, you are on a roll now.

0:11:550:11:56

That's two apiece. And at the end of that round,

0:11:560:11:59

we can see that Noah and Sam are in a tie-breaker situation.

0:11:590:12:02

SIREN WAILS

0:12:020:12:05

Beginning with the letter S, what is the name of the massive desert

0:12:050:12:08

that covers parts of each of...

0:12:080:12:11

The Sahara Desert.

0:12:110:12:12

Sahara Desert is absolutely right, Sam.

0:12:120:12:15

Congratulations.

0:12:150:12:16

Good celebration. Help yourself to a Year Sphere.

0:12:160:12:19

Bad luck, Noah. Bad luck. Extremely close.

0:12:190:12:22

OK, then. Sam is through to play the Egyptian game,

0:12:250:12:28

but will it just be him or will the others get to play too?

0:12:280:12:30

Let's find out.

0:12:300:12:32

Sam, it's a single-player game.

0:12:350:12:37

Off down that Time Sewer by your lonesome.

0:12:370:12:39

It's time for a bit of good old-fashion tomb raiding.

0:12:420:12:45

Tutankhamun's tomb was never looted in ancient Egyptian times,

0:12:450:12:49

but don't let that stop you having a go. Yes, it's time to play...

0:12:490:12:52

Smash your way in through the tomb wall and find Tut's loot.

0:12:550:12:59

Place all four items on the right plinth within the time limit

0:12:590:13:02

and you've earned yourself a Year Sphere.

0:13:020:13:05

KLAXON BLOWS Start!

0:13:070:13:08

Right, Sam, he goes for the right loose block

0:13:080:13:11

and through the wall he goes!

0:13:110:13:13

-Let the rummaging commence, Rattus.

-Oh, I love a good rummage.

0:13:130:13:17

Yes, I heard that about you.

0:13:170:13:18

Egyptians were buried with their possessions, which they would need

0:13:180:13:21

in the afterlife. Money, clothes, weapons,

0:13:210:13:23

they had everything they wanted.

0:13:230:13:25

Well, apart from, you know, being alive.

0:13:250:13:28

Wow! Sam is reaching right inside King Tut's stomach there.

0:13:280:13:32

Oh, he's spotted the pants.

0:13:320:13:34

The pants... Oh, there's the first item.

0:13:340:13:37

The death mask, right in the pile of pants.

0:13:370:13:39

Do you know it's a fact that Tutankhamun was buried

0:13:390:13:41

with 145 spare pairs of underpants?

0:13:410:13:44

Well, you can never have enough pants.

0:13:440:13:46

That's one item down, three more to find.

0:13:460:13:48

But he is going to have to get a wriggle on.

0:13:480:13:50

And wriggle, he certainly does. He moves a mummified cat there.

0:13:500:13:54

And, yes, treasure number two.

0:13:540:13:57

Just like me. I treasure my number twos.

0:13:570:13:59

Yes, you treat them with peculiar reverence. It's on the plinth.

0:13:590:14:03

And back through the wall he goes.

0:14:030:14:06

Sam is keeping up a good pace.

0:14:060:14:08

He literally leaps back into action there. Where is he going to go next?

0:14:080:14:12

I'd look in the pile of pants again.

0:14:120:14:13

Well, you would do, wouldn't you, Rattus?

0:14:130:14:15

But there is no reason to do that. That's the problem.

0:14:150:14:18

He's having a rummage in a chest there.

0:14:180:14:21

He seems to be hitting something of a metaphorical brick wall here.

0:14:210:14:25

Looking in a basket, it's all gone a bit random.

0:14:250:14:27

A little bit drifty.

0:14:270:14:29

Sam needs to get hold of this game and get hold of it he does!

0:14:290:14:33

A third trinket emerges.

0:14:330:14:35

And back to the wall he goes. KLAXON BLOWS

0:14:350:14:38

But it's too late.

0:14:380:14:39

Oh, it was great looting, but there's no Years Sphere.

0:14:390:14:42

What was the game plan, fellow?

0:14:420:14:43

When I got through the wall, it was...look everywhere!

0:14:430:14:47

Sadly, I ran out of time.

0:14:490:14:51

Was it grim looking through the pile of pants?

0:14:510:14:53

"Was it grim looking to the pile of pants?"

0:14:530:14:56

-Of course it was!

-Right.

0:14:560:14:58

Why would anyone ask a question like that?!

0:14:580:15:01

Oh, sorry Sam.

0:15:010:15:03

Oh, bad luck, Sam. Bad luck. No Year Sphere this time.

0:15:030:15:07

But, still, plenty more spheres to play for, everyone.

0:15:070:15:11

Oh! Rattus, what is this?!

0:15:110:15:15

Oh, Dave, I know why you're upset.

0:15:150:15:17

It's cos I've not done your Madame Poosauds bust yet.

0:15:170:15:20

So, come on, let's take a cast of your head.

0:15:200:15:23

Go on, stick it in the bucket.

0:15:230:15:25

Not going to happen, Rattus!

0:15:250:15:26

Not going to happen. I want a wax replica or nothing.

0:15:260:15:30

All right, then. I'll see what I can do.

0:15:300:15:33

Good gracious me!

0:15:330:15:35

Round three. Over to the Gory Grid to find out what's up next.

0:15:360:15:40

It's the Vile Victorians. Good day.

0:15:420:15:46

So, four questions, as always,

0:15:460:15:48

and here are your four Victorian topics...

0:15:480:15:51

So, Chiedza, it's your turn to lead us off. What do you fancy?

0:15:580:16:00

Can I have Queen Victoria, please?

0:16:000:16:02

True or false - Queen Victoria had herself named

0:16:020:16:05

the Empress of India and visited the country a total of 19 times?

0:16:050:16:09

Is that true or is that false? Let's see.

0:16:090:16:12

What's the answer?

0:16:120:16:13

It's false.

0:16:130:16:15

The so-called Empress of India never visited India.

0:16:150:16:19

-I've been to the Taj Mahal.

-Really?

0:16:190:16:21

Yeah, it's my local curry house. I'll have a Friday-night curry.

0:16:210:16:25

-From the bins, obviously.

-Appalling.

0:16:250:16:29

Sam and Noah, congratulations. A good start to that round.

0:16:290:16:32

Sam, it is your turn to pick.

0:16:320:16:34

Can I have Crimean War, please?

0:16:340:16:36

True or false - during the Crimean War,

0:16:360:16:39

the starving British soldiers were freezing in old, tattered tents

0:16:390:16:43

until the Duke of Cambridge arrived with 17 wagonloads

0:16:430:16:46

of clothing and provisions for them?

0:16:460:16:48

Let's see your answers, please.

0:16:480:16:50

What's the answer?

0:16:500:16:51

It's false.

0:16:510:16:53

The Duke's 17 wagons of clothing and provisions

0:16:530:16:56

were just for himself, and quite right, too!

0:16:560:16:59

Outrageous!

0:16:590:17:01

Well done, Sam and Noah, though. A good start to this round.

0:17:010:17:04

You're still in it, Chiedza. Don't you worry about that.

0:17:040:17:06

-Noah, your turn to pick.

-Limps, please.

0:17:060:17:09

True or false - it was fashionable for Victorian ladies

0:17:090:17:13

to walk with a pretend limp?

0:17:130:17:15

Is that true or is that false? Show me now, please.

0:17:150:17:18

Ah! So, it's Sam and Chiedza who agree this time on false.

0:17:180:17:22

Noah thinks it's true. Is it true or false?

0:17:220:17:24

It's true.

0:17:240:17:26

Fashionable young women mimicked the limp

0:17:260:17:28

of Victorian trendsetter Princess Alexandra.

0:17:280:17:31

Shopkeepers even started selling footwear

0:17:310:17:34

with one high heel and one low.

0:17:340:17:36

How stupid would you have to be to buy a pair of those?

0:17:360:17:40

Oops!

0:17:400:17:42

THAT stupid. HE LAUGHS

0:17:420:17:45

Noah, well played. You're into the lead,

0:17:450:17:47

but, Sam, you can still catch him.

0:17:470:17:49

One more question left in this round,

0:17:490:17:51

and it's on Jelly,

0:17:510:17:53

-and it's a prop question.

-Prop question!

0:17:530:17:55

-ALL:

-Prop question! Prop question! Prop question!

0:17:550:17:58

HE GROANS Yuck!

0:17:580:18:01

Victorian jelly was made out of calf feet,

0:18:010:18:05

pigs' bones and sturgeon bladders - true or false?

0:18:050:18:10

Show me your answers now, please.

0:18:100:18:12

I can tell you that the answer is that it's true.

0:18:120:18:16

It is true. To give the jelly its wobbly but firm texture,

0:18:160:18:19

Victorian chefs would use calf feet, pig bones and sturgeon bladders.

0:18:190:18:25

That is absolutely disgusting.

0:18:250:18:27

-Oh, delicious!

-HE GROANS

0:18:270:18:30

So, congratulations, Chiedza.

0:18:300:18:32

You finished that round strongly, but looking at the scoreboard,

0:18:320:18:35

it's Noah who wins the next Year Sphere.

0:18:350:18:38

Help yourself.

0:18:380:18:39

What's going to be in there? We shall find out later on.

0:18:460:18:50

Well done, Noah. OK, Noah's the winner of the Victorian quiz.

0:18:500:18:53

He's through to play the Victorian game,

0:18:530:18:55

but will it be just him or is everybody else going to join him?

0:18:550:18:58

Let's find out.

0:18:580:18:59

Ooh, it's an All Play game!

0:19:020:19:04

So, come on, all of you, down that Time Sewer.

0:19:040:19:06

Go on, Chiedza.

0:19:060:19:08

-Go on, Noah.

-See you! Bye!

0:19:100:19:13

Back in Victorian times,

0:19:130:19:15

they used to send children up chimneys to unblock them.

0:19:150:19:17

You had to be small and nifty or you'd get stuck in the chimney

0:19:170:19:21

and someone had to be sent up after you to shift you.

0:19:210:19:23

Brutal business. It's time to play...

0:19:230:19:26

Scramble up your chimney, shift the four blockages,

0:19:280:19:31

and get your brush out the top before anyone else to win the game.

0:19:310:19:35

In three, two, one...

0:19:350:19:38

HORN HONKS ..sweep!

0:19:380:19:41

So, off they go, and that is a terrific start from Chiedza.

0:19:410:19:43

She's already at her first blockage.

0:19:430:19:45

She looks like she's done this before.

0:19:450:19:47

Maybe she has this game set up in her back garden.

0:19:470:19:49

Well, Noah's no slouch either, but it looks like Sam might be

0:19:490:19:52

-having a little bit of trouble with knots.

-Use your teeth, Sam!

0:19:520:19:54

Don't do that, Sam. Chiedza's got item number two already.

0:19:540:19:58

She is absolutely flying up and down that chimney.

0:19:580:20:01

She drops it off. That's it. She's taken a two-one lead.

0:20:010:20:05

Sam seems to be struggling still with his first item,

0:20:050:20:09

but Noah is keeping things interesting.

0:20:090:20:11

He's returning with his second. Meanwhile, Chiedza's got three.

0:20:110:20:15

Oh, Chiedza's already got her third in her hand

0:20:150:20:18

as the other two deliver one apiece.

0:20:180:20:21

And here comes the sweep to offer some more encouragement.

0:20:210:20:25

-Not that she needs it.

-She doesn't need it at all.

0:20:250:20:28

She's going back up the chimney

0:20:280:20:30

for what will be her final item.

0:20:300:20:32

This is extraordinary.

0:20:320:20:33

This is some of the finest chimney sweeping we have ever seen.

0:20:330:20:37

The boys aren't going to catch her here, I don't think,

0:20:370:20:40

-no matter how much encouragement they get.

-I don't think so.

0:20:400:20:42

No, I don't think so, I KNOW so!

0:20:420:20:44

Look at Sam wrestling there with that final blockage.

0:20:440:20:47

And Chiedza drops her fourth and final blockage,

0:20:470:20:49

and now she's got to go.

0:20:490:20:50

Sam's out of this, I'm afraid.

0:20:500:20:52

It's Chiedza all the way for me.

0:20:520:20:54

She's just got to get up to the end

0:20:540:20:56

and get that broom sticking out proud from the chimney.

0:20:560:20:59

That's it. FANFARE PLAYS

0:20:590:21:01

Use your head, Chiedza.

0:21:010:21:02

She's only gone and won herself a Year Sphere.

0:21:020:21:05

My technique was to just concentrate and not get distracted.

0:21:050:21:09

I just tried to do it as fast as I could.

0:21:090:21:13

Would you make a good chimney sweep, Sam?

0:21:130:21:15

Probably not. I'd probably be burned to death.

0:21:150:21:19

Hey, well done, everybody. Well done.

0:21:190:21:21

And congratulations, Chiedza.

0:21:210:21:23

Help yourself to another Year Sphere.

0:21:230:21:26

Excellent.

0:21:270:21:28

Ooh, Rattus, is this my wax model?

0:21:280:21:32

HE CHUCKLES EXCITEDLY

0:21:320:21:35

-Ta-da!

-CHIEDZA LAUGHS

0:21:360:21:41

-And that's supposed to be me?!

-Yeah! Can't you tell?

0:21:410:21:44

Well, at least it's made out of wax.

0:21:450:21:48

Yeah, earwax.

0:21:480:21:49

Careful! Do you not know how long it took me

0:21:500:21:53

to collect that much earwax?

0:21:530:21:55

Most of it is Viking. They love a good ear clean, Vikings.

0:21:550:21:59

Lovely. Moving on, it's the final round,

0:22:010:22:04

so it's over to the Gory Grid to find out what we've got.

0:22:040:22:07

-It's the Awesome USA.

-So, no quiz, this round.

0:22:090:22:13

It's straight down the Time Sewer for our massive endgame.

0:22:130:22:17

Lead off, Chiedza.

0:22:170:22:19

Imagine what you'd see if you were on the surface of the moon.

0:22:230:22:27

-Bags of astronaut poo.

-Yes, it's true.

0:22:270:22:31

Yeah, they dumped it to make their spacecraft lighter.

0:22:310:22:34

It's time to play...

0:22:340:22:36

Our Apollo 15 astronauts have to dump their bags of poo,

0:22:380:22:42

wee and vomit whilst grabbing themselves three moon rocks.

0:22:420:22:46

The first person to get them back to base

0:22:460:22:48

and raise their flag wins the Year Sphere.

0:22:480:22:50

In three, two, one...

0:22:500:22:53

HORN HONKS ..blast off!

0:22:530:22:55

So, off they go, and their first job, of course,

0:22:550:22:57

is to drop their bags of jobbies into their coloured craters,

0:22:570:23:01

as Sam looks like he's about to...

0:23:010:23:03

Oh, he misses!

0:23:030:23:05

It's one small poo for man,

0:23:050:23:07

one giant sack of doo-doo for mankind.

0:23:070:23:10

Well, indeed it is. Noah and Chiedza on the board.

0:23:100:23:12

Sam is waiting for a little bit of help here

0:23:120:23:14

from the friendly astronaut.

0:23:140:23:16

That's Alan Shepard, by the way,

0:23:160:23:18

who famously played golf on the moon.

0:23:180:23:20

He's keeping busy with other things today, though.

0:23:200:23:23

Chiedza and Noah are moving forward through this game. Chiedza has two.

0:23:230:23:28

Noah now has two. They're still dropping their poos.

0:23:280:23:31

Remember, after three poos have been dropped,

0:23:310:23:33

they'll be looking for rocks to grab and collect.

0:23:330:23:36

And almost simultaneously,

0:23:360:23:38

that's the point that Noah and Chiedza have reached now.

0:23:380:23:41

Do you know, it's a little-known fact - in 1961,

0:23:410:23:44

to test out space flight, Russians sent a guinea pig,

0:23:440:23:47

various reptiles, and 18 mice into space.

0:23:470:23:50

I can think of a rodent who should be sent into space.

0:23:500:23:52

And while Rattus has been wittering on about animals in space,

0:23:520:23:56

Noah has got his first rock

0:23:560:23:58

and has forged into the lead.

0:23:580:24:00

Wow, there's Alan Shepard getting involved again.

0:24:000:24:02

He really is a good egg, Alan Shepard.

0:24:020:24:04

Interesting - his golf handicap is four,

0:24:040:24:06

which makes him quite a reasonable player,

0:24:060:24:08

on the moon or anywhere else.

0:24:080:24:09

One rock apiece now between Noah and Chiedza.

0:24:090:24:12

It really is between them.

0:24:120:24:13

Chiedza goes into the lead. She's got two rocks.

0:24:130:24:16

Noah looks like he's grabbing his second, and delivers it.

0:24:160:24:20

It's two apiece. It's really tight at the top here.

0:24:200:24:22

It's going to come down to who's got the most stamina

0:24:220:24:25

and who's got the best leg speed

0:24:250:24:27

and who doesn't crash into their own crater.

0:24:270:24:30

Chiedza still needing that final rock.

0:24:300:24:33

That's Sam delivering his second rock.

0:24:330:24:36

Sam's coming back into it.

0:24:360:24:37

But now Noah has gone into the lead.

0:24:370:24:40

Chiedza's fighting back.

0:24:400:24:41

This is incredibly close.

0:24:410:24:43

It's all going to be about the flag plant here, I think.

0:24:430:24:46

Sam grabs his third,

0:24:460:24:48

but he's out of it now because Chiedza's out of the buggy.

0:24:480:24:50

She's going to do this!

0:24:500:24:52

She plants her flag. She claims her Year Sphere.

0:24:520:24:55

And, I wonder, could she be a future astronaut?

0:24:550:24:58

I think it would be hard to be an astronaut

0:24:580:25:00

because I kept crashing into stuff.

0:25:000:25:02

Noah, you just missed out.

0:25:020:25:04

I was on my third rock,

0:25:040:25:06

but I got overtaken right at the end.

0:25:060:25:09

-How was that for you, Sam?

-Wow!

0:25:090:25:12

There's a lot less gravity than I'm used to, I can tell you that.

0:25:120:25:15

Well, it is the moon.

0:25:150:25:17

Hey, welcome back! What a brilliant, sporting contest that was.

0:25:170:25:20

Chiedza, yes, go for it.

0:25:200:25:22

Help yourself to a Year Sphere. Lovely. Great stuff.

0:25:220:25:27

Now, time to count up those Year Spheres.

0:25:270:25:29

And, remember, AD dates are added to your total,

0:25:290:25:32

and BC dates are subtracted from it.

0:25:320:25:36

Here we go, then. Sam,

0:25:360:25:37

let's open up that first one.

0:25:370:25:39

Ooh, it's a BC, but it's not a disaster.

0:25:400:25:43

44 BC - the death of

0:25:430:25:45

Julius Caesar that year.

0:25:450:25:47

Let's have a look at the second one.

0:25:470:25:49

Oh, no, no, no! It's another BC.

0:25:490:25:52

1600 BC - construction stops

0:25:520:25:56

on Stonehenge round about then.

0:25:560:25:58

Sam, I'm sorry, but you've ended up with a BC total.

0:25:580:26:01

You may still win. Who knows what's in these?

0:26:010:26:04

Noah, let's have a look.

0:26:040:26:06

1661 AD - Charles II was crowned

0:26:070:26:11

King of England and Scotland that year.

0:26:110:26:13

I'm sorry, Sam, that means it's curtains for you.

0:26:130:26:16

Noah, you are in the lead.

0:26:160:26:17

Chiedza, that's what you've got to beat.

0:26:170:26:19

Let's have a look.

0:26:190:26:21

1718 AD. It's a very strong start.

0:26:210:26:24

Blackbeard the pirate was killed that year.

0:26:240:26:26

Let's have a look at that second one.

0:26:260:26:28

Ooh, 330 BC.

0:26:290:26:32

So, we're going back the other way.

0:26:320:26:33

The conquest of the Persian Empire

0:26:330:26:35

by Alexander the Great was that year.

0:26:350:26:37

It all hinges on this one.

0:26:370:26:38

Let's have a look at it.

0:26:380:26:40

It's 1431 AD.

0:26:400:26:42

Joan of Arc was burned at

0:26:420:26:44

the stake that year, but what it really means, Chiedza,

0:26:440:26:47

is that you are today's winner. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:26:470:26:50

Congratulations, Chiedza. You have a total of 2,819 points.

0:26:500:26:54

And what, dare I ask, is our star prize this week, Rattus?

0:26:540:26:58

Oh, well, Dave, it's two tickets to Madame Poosauds.

0:26:580:27:04

MUSIC STOPS

0:27:040:27:05

Come and see some amazing celebrities -

0:27:050:27:08

George Pooney, Kim Kar-splash-ian,

0:27:080:27:11

Benedict Bumberbatch and Donald Trump.

0:27:110:27:15

Didn't have to change that one.

0:27:150:27:16

Two tickets there, Chiedza - one for you,

0:27:160:27:19

one for someone you really hate. SHE LAUGHS

0:27:190:27:22

I'm afraid our runners-up aren't getting away poop-free, either.

0:27:220:27:25

You two, down the Time Sewer and off home.

0:27:250:27:28

-Enjoy!

-Bye, Noah. Bye, Sam.

-Goodbye.

-Goodbye.

0:27:280:27:32

Goodbye.

0:27:320:27:34

Ew! That's just disgusting!

0:27:360:27:39

I've been Dave Lamb.

0:27:390:27:41

And I've been Rattus Rattus.

0:27:410:27:42

I can't move!

0:27:420:27:44

And you've been watching Gory Games.

0:27:440:27:46

In glorious smell-o-vision, I hope.

0:27:460:27:49

-BOTH:

-Goodbye.

0:27:490:27:51

Sam, Noah and Chiedza battle it out to win Year Spheres in games including Space Race and Lootin-khamun. And Rattus makes Dave the centerpiece of his star-studded celeb museum, which sounds way more glamorous than it is. If you're of a nervous disposition, look away!


Download Subtitles

SRT

ASS