Browse content similar to Episode 8. Check below for episodes and series from the same categories and more!
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# Terrible Tudors, gorgeous Georgians | 0:00:01 | 0:00:03 | |
# Slimy Stuarts, vile Victorians Woeful Wars, ferocious Fights | 0:00:03 | 0:00:06 | |
# Dingy castles, daring knights Horrors that defy description | 0:00:06 | 0:00:09 | |
# Cut-throat Celts Awful Egyptians | 0:00:09 | 0:00:10 | |
# Vicious Vikings, cruel crime Punishment from ancient times | 0:00:10 | 0:00:12 | |
# Roman, rotten, rank and ruthless Cavemen savage, fierce and toothless | 0:00:12 | 0:00:14 | |
# Groovy Greeks, reigning sages Mean and measly Middle Ages | 0:00:14 | 0:00:18 | |
# Gory stories We do that | 0:00:18 | 0:00:20 | |
# And your host a talking rat | 0:00:20 | 0:00:23 | |
# The past is no longer a mystery | 0:00:23 | 0:00:26 | |
# Welcome to Horrible Histories. # | 0:00:26 | 0:00:31 | |
Viking warriors, tomorrow, as the sun rises, we set sail for England! | 0:00:38 | 0:00:43 | |
ALL: Yes! | 0:00:43 | 0:00:46 | |
We must be bold, we must be terrifying! | 0:00:46 | 0:00:50 | |
We have our axes. | 0:00:51 | 0:00:54 | |
We have our daggers. | 0:00:54 | 0:00:55 | |
We have our swords, but now we have a new weapon at our disposal. | 0:00:55 | 0:01:01 | |
-Make-up. -What! | 0:01:01 | 0:01:04 | |
Do this, my brothers... | 0:01:04 | 0:01:08 | |
and you shall strike fear into our enemies' hearts. | 0:01:08 | 0:01:13 | |
ALL: YES! | 0:01:13 | 0:01:15 | |
Let's go and kill some monks. | 0:01:16 | 0:01:19 | |
Olaf, good work, you look truly bloodcurdling, | 0:01:22 | 0:01:26 | |
Sven, my old friend, excellent, you will chill the enemy to their bones. | 0:01:26 | 0:01:32 | |
Bjorn, that's what I call really scary. | 0:01:32 | 0:01:37 | |
Eric... | 0:01:38 | 0:01:41 | |
It's the nose, isn't it? A bit much? | 0:01:43 | 0:01:44 | |
No, it's, really terrifying. | 0:01:44 | 0:01:46 | |
Let's get us some monasteries! | 0:01:46 | 0:01:49 | |
It's true though, those rough, tough Viking warriors liked to wear | 0:01:55 | 0:01:59 | |
eye make-up, neatly trim their beards and have | 0:01:59 | 0:02:02 | |
a good wash every Saturday night. | 0:02:02 | 0:02:04 | |
When they invaded Britain, they loved to pick on | 0:02:04 | 0:02:07 | |
easy targets, like poor, defenceless monks. | 0:02:07 | 0:02:10 | |
Do you know, Vikings were basically just great big girls, yeah? | 0:02:10 | 0:02:13 | |
But don't tell them I said that! | 0:02:13 | 0:02:15 | |
Whoa! Stop! Whoa, what's going on? | 0:02:22 | 0:02:26 | |
We were minding our own business, they came out the blue with axes. | 0:02:26 | 0:02:29 | |
ALL TALK AT ONCE | 0:02:29 | 0:02:31 | |
Da, da, da, da, da! One at a time please! You, is what he said true? | 0:02:31 | 0:02:36 | |
I asked you to stop for a second while we sort this out, please. | 0:02:36 | 0:02:40 | |
I was just... He... | 0:02:40 | 0:02:43 | |
Thank you, now what are you doing here? This is Lindisfarne, | 0:02:45 | 0:02:49 | |
we're a monastery, we're peaceful people. | 0:02:49 | 0:02:52 | |
Well, I hadn't | 0:02:52 | 0:02:54 | |
really thought about it before. Why did we sail here from Scandinavia? | 0:02:54 | 0:02:58 | |
Maybe it's because there's not enough food, | 0:02:58 | 0:03:00 | |
there's a shortage of herring where we're from. | 0:03:00 | 0:03:02 | |
We needed more land, my dad's left all of his land | 0:03:02 | 0:03:05 | |
-to my older brother, which isn't fair. -But it is a bit crowded. | 0:03:05 | 0:03:09 | |
Well, we do need more space to live. | 0:03:09 | 0:03:10 | |
Plus we've got a new Viking king now, | 0:03:10 | 0:03:12 | |
and he's such a bully. As are our wives. | 0:03:12 | 0:03:15 | |
It seems to me like you don't know why you're here, | 0:03:17 | 0:03:21 | |
why don't you just go home and we'll say no more about it. | 0:03:21 | 0:03:25 | |
No, I've just remembered what it is, it's because killing is really fun | 0:03:25 | 0:03:29 | |
and taking stuff from monks is very easy. | 0:03:29 | 0:03:30 | |
-That's it. -Yeah, yeah, it was, it's mainly that, that was it. | 0:03:30 | 0:03:34 | |
Right, well... | 0:03:35 | 0:03:37 | |
as long as we're clear on that... | 0:03:37 | 0:03:40 | |
carry on. | 0:03:40 | 0:03:41 | |
You're watching HH TV Sports bringing you exclusive live | 0:03:52 | 0:03:56 | |
sporting events from the past. | 0:03:56 | 0:03:58 | |
Today, it's football, but not as you know it. | 0:03:58 | 0:04:01 | |
Time to go over live to the 1500s to join our commentator, pit side. | 0:04:01 | 0:04:06 | |
Hello and welcome to Tudor England, | 0:04:06 | 0:04:08 | |
where the big sport of the common man is an early form of football. | 0:04:08 | 0:04:12 | |
I'm here with Alan, captain of the Roxbridge Village team, | 0:04:12 | 0:04:15 | |
who's here to tell me a little bit more about the sport. | 0:04:15 | 0:04:17 | |
Alan, I understand it's a very important match here today? | 0:04:17 | 0:04:20 | |
Yes, Gary, the whole village has turned out. | 0:04:20 | 0:04:23 | |
Great to see so much support for the team. | 0:04:23 | 0:04:24 | |
Support? No, everyone plays for the team, the whole village is playing, | 0:04:24 | 0:04:28 | |
it's our village versus the neighbouring village. | 0:04:28 | 0:04:31 | |
I see, and what's the score? | 0:04:31 | 0:04:33 | |
Oh, it's still 0-0, but we did come close to a goal. | 0:04:33 | 0:04:36 | |
-Really, how close exactly? -About two and a half miles. | 0:04:36 | 0:04:39 | |
Two and a half miles? | 0:04:39 | 0:04:40 | |
We play between two villages and the winning team | 0:04:40 | 0:04:43 | |
gets the ball to the opposing village. | 0:04:43 | 0:04:46 | |
I don't... Argh! And...and this is your ball? | 0:04:46 | 0:04:48 | |
-Yeah, it's made of pig's bladder. -It looks like a pig... | 0:04:48 | 0:04:51 | |
Argh! Now... I... That... Wait... That, that... That is inexcusable. | 0:04:53 | 0:04:58 | |
-Where is the referee? -There's no referee, there's no rules. | 0:04:58 | 0:05:01 | |
Oh, that does explain the black eye, | 0:05:01 | 0:05:04 | |
the broken finger and what appears to be a bitten ear. | 0:05:04 | 0:05:07 | |
Yeah, well, it's just a gentle game today, Gary. | 0:05:07 | 0:05:09 | |
Last game, I dislocated my arm and broke my jaw. | 0:05:09 | 0:05:12 | |
Would it be possible to have a word with the captain of the opposition? | 0:05:12 | 0:05:16 | |
-Go ahead. -Thank you. So, how's the game going from your point of view? | 0:05:16 | 0:05:20 | |
Hi, Gary. Yeah, pretty good. | 0:05:20 | 0:05:22 | |
I think it'll be a long one... Could go on for hours. | 0:05:22 | 0:05:26 | |
-Some of the lads will end up flat on their backs. -Exhausted? | 0:05:26 | 0:05:30 | |
No, dead. It's how brutal the game can be. Want to be on our side? | 0:05:30 | 0:05:34 | |
I'll certainly give it a go. | 0:05:34 | 0:05:37 | |
Um... Oh! Oh! | 0:05:37 | 0:05:39 | |
Yep, still got it, back to the studio. | 0:05:41 | 0:05:44 | |
Henry VIII needed lots of young fit men for the English army. | 0:05:44 | 0:05:49 | |
So many people were getting injured playing Tudor football, in 1540 | 0:05:49 | 0:05:54 | |
Henry made it illegal. | 0:05:54 | 0:05:56 | |
There really were some unusual laws in Tudor times. | 0:05:56 | 0:06:00 | |
-Give me your purse. -Oh! -Give me your purse! | 0:06:02 | 0:06:04 | |
-Take it, take it! -Lovely, hold on, hold on. Right... | 0:06:04 | 0:06:08 | |
There's your change and I'll just write you a receipt. | 0:06:08 | 0:06:11 | |
-Excuse me? -I only wanted 11p, so I gave you the rest | 0:06:11 | 0:06:14 | |
and I'll write you a little piece of paper. | 0:06:14 | 0:06:16 | |
That just saves any confusion, should it come to court. | 0:06:16 | 0:06:19 | |
Um, I'm still a little confused. | 0:06:19 | 0:06:20 | |
Well, you see, if you steal 11 pence or less they | 0:06:20 | 0:06:23 | |
chuck you in prison, but if you steal | 0:06:23 | 0:06:24 | |
12 pence or more then they sentence you to death. | 0:06:24 | 0:06:27 | |
-Oh, I see! -So I'll just write you this receipt. | 0:06:27 | 0:06:30 | |
Not going to sign it, for obvious reasons. | 0:06:30 | 0:06:33 | |
OK, there you go, have a nice day. | 0:06:33 | 0:06:35 | |
That's the most pleasant mugging | 0:06:35 | 0:06:37 | |
-I've ever had. -Oh, well, we take pride in our work. | 0:06:37 | 0:06:41 | |
In fact, here's a penny for your trouble. | 0:06:41 | 0:06:43 | |
Oh, well, thank you very much, that's very kind of you. | 0:06:43 | 0:06:46 | |
This makes 12 pence, if I'm caught... | 0:06:46 | 0:06:48 | |
It looks like somebody's for the chop. | 0:06:48 | 0:06:49 | |
Oh, no, this is a tip. | 0:06:49 | 0:06:51 | |
-Oh, ho, it's a tip, is it? -Yes. | 0:06:51 | 0:06:53 | |
-Oh, that's right...so you weren't mugging her? -No, I was. | 0:06:53 | 0:06:56 | |
I'm going to chop your head off. | 0:06:56 | 0:06:58 | |
Oh, have mercy Sir. | 0:06:58 | 0:06:59 | |
Us ancient Egyptians used a clever writing system called hieroglyphics, | 0:07:03 | 0:07:08 | |
but it was not an easy system to learn, check this out. | 0:07:08 | 0:07:12 | |
# Settle down class Now you've passed | 0:07:17 | 0:07:19 | |
# Your grade one pyramid selling | 0:07:19 | 0:07:21 | |
# Yeah, the time has come for me to drum | 0:07:21 | 0:07:24 | |
# Some facts into you about spelling | 0:07:24 | 0:07:26 | |
# Oh, it seems to me your ABC | 0:07:26 | 0:07:29 | |
# Skills are less than terrific | 0:07:29 | 0:07:31 | |
# So buck up, boys As we master the joys | 0:07:31 | 0:07:34 | |
# Of the lovely hieroglyphic, woo! | 0:07:34 | 0:07:36 | |
# Everyone needs their ABC | 0:07:36 | 0:07:38 | |
# It's as simple as vulture, foot, basket | 0:07:38 | 0:07:41 | |
# You know how to sing doh, ray, me | 0:07:41 | 0:07:43 | |
# Easy to spell It's hand, eye, thingy, owl | 0:07:43 | 0:07:46 | |
# ABC, vulture, foot, basket | 0:07:46 | 0:07:48 | |
# Doh, ray me | 0:07:48 | 0:07:49 | |
# Hand, eye, thingy, owl | 0:07:49 | 0:07:51 | |
# You'll pass with ease and find it's a breeze | 0:07:55 | 0:07:58 | |
# The rules are scientific | 0:07:58 | 0:08:00 | |
# Don't have to be smart all you do is start | 0:08:00 | 0:08:02 | |
# With simple phonetic glyphics | 0:08:02 | 0:08:05 | |
# Next you get to learn as a set more things called logographic | 0:08:05 | 0:08:09 | |
# Finally, third, the form of a word determinatives | 0:08:10 | 0:08:13 | |
Horrific! | 0:08:13 | 0:08:14 | |
# Everyone needs their flamingo, house, sun | 0:08:14 | 0:08:17 | |
# It's simple, but sun can mean duck, everyone | 0:08:17 | 0:08:20 | |
# You all know how to write your name | 0:08:20 | 0:08:21 | |
Except for me, Tutan Nephertiti Khamun! | 0:08:21 | 0:08:24 | |
-# Flamingo, house, sun -Means duck to some | 0:08:24 | 0:08:26 | |
-# Tutan Nephertiti Khamun -Let's just leave that one | 0:08:26 | 0:08:29 | |
# If you find it hard Don't be afraid | 0:08:33 | 0:08:36 | |
# To go and ask your mummy for aid | 0:08:36 | 0:08:38 | |
# Now, it's time for a spelling bee | 0:08:38 | 0:08:41 | |
# That's not how you spell bee see me! | 0:08:41 | 0:08:43 | |
Foot, reed, reed... Easy! | 0:08:43 | 0:08:46 | |
# Cat, pig, dog, rat, duck, frog Make your spelling magnific | 0:08:46 | 0:08:50 | |
# You can go up and down, left and right and around | 0:08:50 | 0:08:53 | |
# The punctuation in hieroglyphic | 0:08:53 | 0:08:55 | |
# A B C D E F G | 0:08:56 | 0:08:58 | |
# Just 700 characters or so | 0:08:58 | 0:09:00 | |
# Now that's done, let's have fun | 0:09:00 | 0:09:02 | |
# With numbers, here we go | 0:09:02 | 0:09:05 | |
# Everyone needs their 123 | 0:09:05 | 0:09:07 | |
# It's as simple as eye, eye, eye, eye | 0:09:07 | 0:09:10 | |
# You can all count to 99... # Easy to write it's hoop, hoop, hoop | 0:09:10 | 0:09:15 | |
Hoop, hoop, hoop, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye. | 0:09:15 | 0:09:22 | |
-# 123 -Eye, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye | 0:09:22 | 0:09:25 | |
-# 99 -Hoop, hoop, hoop, hoop, hoop, | 0:09:25 | 0:09:27 | |
Hoop, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye, eye... Basket? | 0:09:27 | 0:09:32 | |
The answer is B, they cut off and counted the right hands. | 0:09:51 | 0:09:56 | |
One of the worst battles in the Second World War was the | 0:10:01 | 0:10:04 | |
one the Russians and the Germans had over the city of Stalingrad, here. | 0:10:04 | 0:10:08 | |
It lasted for seven months and | 0:10:08 | 0:10:10 | |
in the cruel Russian winter, the Germans soon ran out of supplies | 0:10:10 | 0:10:13 | |
and had to improvise, in the most gruesome of ways. | 0:10:13 | 0:10:17 | |
Oh, ha, ha. | 0:10:17 | 0:10:19 | |
Greetings, Herr Soldier. | 0:10:21 | 0:10:23 | |
Greetings, Herr Stodman. I'm here about a few supplies, | 0:10:23 | 0:10:27 | |
some new boots, a jacket and some food. | 0:10:27 | 0:10:29 | |
Excellent. Well, I shall take ze whole lot. | 0:10:29 | 0:10:32 | |
No, zat is what I want from you. | 0:10:32 | 0:10:34 | |
What? | 0:10:34 | 0:10:35 | |
You are joking, right? We have been fighting | 0:10:37 | 0:10:40 | |
here in Russia for six months now, we have run out of all our supplies. | 0:10:40 | 0:10:44 | |
But I need new things, my boots, | 0:10:44 | 0:10:46 | |
zey have so many holes in them, I don't feel like I'm wearing any. | 0:10:46 | 0:10:49 | |
Well, you are not wearing any. | 0:10:49 | 0:10:52 | |
Oh, well, zat would explain it. | 0:10:53 | 0:10:55 | |
-Is there nothing that you can give me? -Well, I think you're in luck. | 0:10:55 | 0:11:00 | |
I got these boots in this morning, good quality too, they're Russian. | 0:11:00 | 0:11:03 | |
-How do you know zey are Russian? -Er.... | 0:11:03 | 0:11:06 | |
There was a Russian in them. | 0:11:06 | 0:11:08 | |
-I cannot wear those! -Of course you can, you just put | 0:11:08 | 0:11:12 | |
them in ze oven for ten minutes and ze legs will pop right out. | 0:11:12 | 0:11:15 | |
I'm not going to wear a dead man's boots. | 0:11:15 | 0:11:18 | |
Is there nothing else you have, a jacket? | 0:11:18 | 0:11:20 | |
I am so cold I have goose pimples on my goose pimples. | 0:11:20 | 0:11:22 | |
Argh, I have just the thing. | 0:11:22 | 0:11:25 | |
We managed to get this in from Berlin. | 0:11:25 | 0:11:27 | |
-Oh, perfect. -Ah... | 0:11:27 | 0:11:29 | |
Oh, zat is better, oh... And it is not off a dead man, right? | 0:11:29 | 0:11:34 | |
No, it is from a dead woman. | 0:11:34 | 0:11:35 | |
Brrrrr! What about food, do you have any food? | 0:11:37 | 0:11:40 | |
Ah, well, | 0:11:40 | 0:11:41 | |
only tis rather suspiciously named meat paste, I got it in from Germany. | 0:11:41 | 0:11:48 | |
-What's it like? -Well, ze impression I got from Lieutenant Gotlieb was, | 0:11:48 | 0:11:53 | |
it's not very good for you. | 0:11:53 | 0:11:55 | |
-Who's Lieutenant Gotlieb? -Er, zis fellow over here. | 0:11:55 | 0:11:58 | |
Zat is exactly what Gotlieb did, except from both ends. | 0:12:02 | 0:12:06 | |
All you have is inedible food, a dead man's boots, a dead woman's | 0:12:06 | 0:12:11 | |
coat? Is there nothing you have that is any use to me? | 0:12:11 | 0:12:15 | |
Well, as our 10,000th customer, | 0:12:15 | 0:12:18 | |
you have just won, an all-expenses-paid fortnight | 0:12:18 | 0:12:23 | |
on the beaches of Brazil. | 0:12:23 | 0:12:25 | |
-Oh, really. -No. Raus! | 0:12:26 | 0:12:29 | |
Can I not work here with you? | 0:12:31 | 0:12:32 | |
No, I'm afraid it is just me and Gotlieb. | 0:12:32 | 0:12:34 | |
-Auf wiedersehen. -Look at it. | 0:12:37 | 0:12:40 | |
For the Germans, the Battle of Stalingrad was a tactical disaster. | 0:12:40 | 0:12:45 | |
Mind you, some of the Russian tactics during World War Two | 0:12:45 | 0:12:48 | |
didn't go that well either. | 0:12:48 | 0:12:50 | |
The Second World War's Russian anti-tank device. | 0:12:54 | 0:12:57 | |
The penniless Russians needed a cheap way to destroy the unbeatable | 0:12:57 | 0:13:00 | |
German tanks, so they invented... | 0:13:00 | 0:13:03 | |
Dog bombs. | 0:13:03 | 0:13:05 | |
Yes, dogs were trained to run underneath tanks | 0:13:05 | 0:13:08 | |
with bombs strapped to their backs. | 0:13:08 | 0:13:12 | |
The Russians sent their brilliant | 0:13:12 | 0:13:14 | |
new doggy weapon into battle but there was one small problem. | 0:13:14 | 0:13:20 | |
The dogs had been trained to run under Russian tanks. | 0:13:20 | 0:13:24 | |
Nyet! There, doggy, stay...sit. | 0:13:24 | 0:13:27 | |
So they ran under the Russian tanks. | 0:13:27 | 0:13:30 | |
Bad doggy. | 0:13:30 | 0:13:32 | |
Oh, well, back to drawing board. | 0:13:33 | 0:13:36 | |
Hi, I'm a shouty Georgian woman, | 0:13:43 | 0:13:46 | |
and I'm here to tell you about the very latest | 0:13:46 | 0:13:49 | |
in Georgian mobile communication technology, the fan. | 0:13:49 | 0:13:53 | |
Each little gesture with the fan send out a totally different message, | 0:13:53 | 0:13:57 | |
and it's so simple to use, | 0:13:57 | 0:13:58 | |
and your parents won't have a clue what you're messaging. | 0:13:58 | 0:14:01 | |
Send thousands of messages a day, and there's no bill to pay, | 0:14:01 | 0:14:05 | |
everybody should have one. | 0:14:05 | 0:14:07 | |
-Except you, because you're a bloke. -Yeah, terribly sorry. | 0:14:07 | 0:14:10 | |
It's also handy for wafting away foul smells, phewee. | 0:14:10 | 0:14:15 | |
Yeah, terribly sorry. | 0:14:15 | 0:14:17 | |
So don't delay, buy your Georgian fan today. | 0:14:17 | 0:14:20 | |
'Warning, too much fan flattering | 0:14:20 | 0:14:22 | |
can seriously damage a lady's wrist.' | 0:14:22 | 0:14:24 | |
Ow. | 0:14:24 | 0:14:25 | |
Are you quite well, daughter? | 0:14:26 | 0:14:28 | |
Oh, most well, father. | 0:14:28 | 0:14:31 | |
Good day, Mr Willis. | 0:14:32 | 0:14:33 | |
Good day, Mr Andrews. | 0:14:33 | 0:14:35 | |
Surprisingly warm weather for the time of year, Mr Willis. | 0:14:49 | 0:14:52 | |
Er, indeed, Mr Andrews. | 0:14:52 | 0:14:54 | |
Yes! | 0:14:58 | 0:14:59 | |
Yes, this is my favourite composer. | 0:14:59 | 0:15:02 | |
Whooo! | 0:15:06 | 0:15:07 | |
It's the latest dance from London town, Mr Willis. | 0:15:10 | 0:15:13 | |
I see, Mr Andrews. | 0:15:13 | 0:15:15 | |
-Soon. -Sorry? | 0:15:17 | 0:15:19 | |
Spoon. I need a spoon. | 0:15:19 | 0:15:21 | |
Strange boy. | 0:15:21 | 0:15:23 | |
Sir, there is a most pressing question | 0:15:28 | 0:15:32 | |
I would like to ask your daughter. | 0:15:32 | 0:15:34 | |
HE CRIES | 0:15:44 | 0:15:47 | |
Strange, strange boy. | 0:15:49 | 0:15:52 | |
We Georgian ladies may have had some funny customs, | 0:16:00 | 0:16:03 | |
but let me assure you, Georgian gentleman were just as silly. | 0:16:03 | 0:16:08 | |
Hiya, fashion fans, and welcome to another Historical Fashion Fix. | 0:16:14 | 0:16:20 | |
This week it's all about wigs, stockings and makeup, | 0:16:20 | 0:16:24 | |
you've guessed it, | 0:16:24 | 0:16:26 | |
this week we're going to be making over a Georgian man, | 0:16:26 | 0:16:29 | |
-so let's meet him now. Hi, Daniel. -Sorry? | 0:16:29 | 0:16:32 | |
Let's see if we can't work some Fashion Fix magic, | 0:16:32 | 0:16:35 | |
-and turn you into an authentic Georgian aristocrat. -All right. | 0:16:35 | 0:16:39 | |
Let's sort out that skin. | 0:16:41 | 0:16:44 | |
-He's looking pretty pale. -I haven't eaten in a week. | 0:16:44 | 0:16:47 | |
But he could do with being a lot paler, | 0:16:47 | 0:16:49 | |
so I've stuck some leeches on his arm. | 0:16:49 | 0:16:52 | |
But he's still not pale enough for a Georgian aristocrat, | 0:16:52 | 0:16:55 | |
so to make Daniel even whiter, you could use chalk dust, | 0:16:55 | 0:16:59 | |
but I prefer to use highly toxic lead paint. | 0:16:59 | 0:17:03 | |
Just add some lipstick and blusher, and let's see the difference. | 0:17:03 | 0:17:09 | |
There, much more manly. Do you like it, Daniel? | 0:17:11 | 0:17:15 | |
Course he does, he loves it. | 0:17:15 | 0:17:17 | |
Now, let's do something about those awful clothes. | 0:17:17 | 0:17:20 | |
Well, at least I can't look any more ridiculous. | 0:17:20 | 0:17:23 | |
I stand corrected. | 0:17:25 | 0:17:27 | |
Every bit the Georgian gent, | 0:17:27 | 0:17:29 | |
and that padding really accentuates Daniel's lovely calves. | 0:17:29 | 0:17:34 | |
What you doing? | 0:17:34 | 0:17:35 | |
Just time for the finishing touches, the wig. | 0:17:35 | 0:17:39 | |
The wig is held in place using powder made from flour, starch, nutmeg, | 0:17:39 | 0:17:45 | |
and, of course, gold dust. | 0:17:45 | 0:17:47 | |
There. Looking good, but there's one thing missing. | 0:17:50 | 0:17:54 | |
No Georgian gent is complete without some lice in his wig. | 0:17:54 | 0:18:00 | |
-How do you like your look, Daniel? -I look like a poodle on a cushion. | 0:18:00 | 0:18:03 | |
Some people just can't wear good clothes. | 0:18:03 | 0:18:06 | |
You have given me nothing for this programme, absolutely nothing. | 0:18:06 | 0:18:09 | |
That's it this week from Fashion Fix, | 0:18:09 | 0:18:12 | |
join me next time, when I'll be teaching a stone age caveman | 0:18:12 | 0:18:15 | |
that it's better to wear some clothes for once. See you. | 0:18:15 | 0:18:19 | |
Posh Georgian men who dressed up like that were known as Macaronis. | 0:18:19 | 0:18:24 | |
Not sure why, | 0:18:24 | 0:18:25 | |
presumably because they looked better covered in cheese. Ha-ha-ha! | 0:18:25 | 0:18:29 | |
Mind you, I think everything looks better covered in cheese. | 0:18:29 | 0:18:33 | |
# Stupid deaths, stupid deaths | 0:18:41 | 0:18:43 | |
# They're funny cos they're true | 0:18:43 | 0:18:46 | |
# Woo Stupid deaths, stupid deaths | 0:18:46 | 0:18:48 | |
# Hope next time it's not you He-he. # | 0:18:48 | 0:18:52 | |
Oh! Next! | 0:18:52 | 0:18:54 | |
And you are? | 0:18:56 | 0:18:57 | |
Sir Arthur Aston, English army officer. | 0:18:57 | 0:18:59 | |
Yeah, yeah, course you are, whatever. Come on, entertain me. | 0:19:01 | 0:19:06 | |
Well, I was showing off on my horse | 0:19:06 | 0:19:08 | |
-for the benefit of some lovely young ladies. -Hmm, and? | 0:19:08 | 0:19:12 | |
Well, I fell off the horse, I broke my leg, | 0:19:12 | 0:19:15 | |
it turned septic, so I had to have it amputated. | 0:19:15 | 0:19:18 | |
-And you bled to death? -Oh, no, no, no, I was fine. | 0:19:18 | 0:19:21 | |
-Oh, shame. -You see, I was given this rather wonderful wooden leg, | 0:19:21 | 0:19:26 | |
and I was able to return to the army, | 0:19:26 | 0:19:29 | |
and soon I found myself in a battle, against Oliver Cromwell's army. | 0:19:29 | 0:19:33 | |
Oh, good. How did it go? | 0:19:33 | 0:19:35 | |
Not brilliantly, I was captured and, well, I was beaten to death. | 0:19:35 | 0:19:40 | |
With my own wooden leg. | 0:19:40 | 0:19:43 | |
HE LAUGHS | 0:19:43 | 0:19:46 | |
With your own wood... | 0:19:48 | 0:19:49 | |
Oh, that's hilarious! | 0:19:49 | 0:19:53 | |
I bet you were hopping mad! | 0:19:53 | 0:19:55 | |
Hopping! | 0:19:55 | 0:19:56 | |
You're very insensitive, you know that? | 0:19:57 | 0:19:59 | |
It's a yes from me, Arthur, you're through to the afterlife. | 0:19:59 | 0:20:04 | |
Oh, thank you, thank you. | 0:20:04 | 0:20:06 | |
Hop along now. Hop along! | 0:20:06 | 0:20:10 | |
Very insensitive. | 0:20:10 | 0:20:11 | |
Oh, dear. You know, I love my job sometimes, I do, I really do. | 0:20:11 | 0:20:17 | |
Next! | 0:20:17 | 0:20:18 | |
# Stupid deaths, stupid deaths | 0:20:18 | 0:20:20 | |
# Hope next time it's not you Hoo-hoo! # | 0:20:20 | 0:20:24 | |
We Stuarts believed that after the Battle of Edgehill in 1642, | 0:20:24 | 0:20:29 | |
the ghosts of the soldiers who died | 0:20:29 | 0:20:31 | |
could be seen acting out the battle again and again. | 0:20:31 | 0:20:34 | |
Whoo, and here's another scary story. | 0:20:34 | 0:20:38 | |
Greetings, fright fans. | 0:20:43 | 0:20:45 | |
I am Vincenzo Laughoff, and this week's scary story | 0:20:45 | 0:20:49 | |
is a ghostly tale from Stuart times, The Terror Of Tedworth. | 0:20:49 | 0:20:55 | |
It was the year 1662. | 0:20:57 | 0:21:00 | |
A magistrate named John Mompesson | 0:21:00 | 0:21:03 | |
was visiting the town of Tedworth in Wiltshire, | 0:21:03 | 0:21:05 | |
where he was disturbed by a local busker repeatedly banging on a drum. | 0:21:05 | 0:21:09 | |
DRUM BANGS | 0:21:09 | 0:21:13 | |
Quiet, we're recording. | 0:21:13 | 0:21:15 | |
The magistrate checked the man's license to busk, | 0:21:15 | 0:21:18 | |
and, finding it to be a forgery, threw him in jail, | 0:21:18 | 0:21:20 | |
and confiscated his drum, a decision he would come to regret. | 0:21:20 | 0:21:24 | |
DRUM DONGS | 0:21:24 | 0:21:26 | |
Dong indeed. After the busker was freed from jail, | 0:21:26 | 0:21:28 | |
he simply disappeared, | 0:21:28 | 0:21:31 | |
and it soon became clear that he must have perished, | 0:21:31 | 0:21:33 | |
because his ghost started to haunt the mean magistrate. | 0:21:33 | 0:21:37 | |
GHOST WHOOS | 0:21:37 | 0:21:38 | |
Oh, no, it was much more than a mere "Whoo, whoo." | 0:21:38 | 0:21:41 | |
The spirit of the dead busker plagued the magistrate's house. | 0:21:41 | 0:21:44 | |
At first, his drum began to bang itself. | 0:21:44 | 0:21:47 | |
Then doors would open and shut on their own, | 0:21:47 | 0:21:50 | |
unseen creatures would gnaw at the walls. | 0:21:50 | 0:21:54 | |
Coins would turn black inside pockets, | 0:21:54 | 0:21:57 | |
and red, staring eyes would appear in the darkness. | 0:21:57 | 0:22:00 | |
Had the busker's soul come back from the dead | 0:22:00 | 0:22:03 | |
to wreak his revenge on the meddling magistrate? | 0:22:03 | 0:22:06 | |
Was his ghost destined to forever haunt the horror-filled house? | 0:22:06 | 0:22:10 | |
No, he was alive and well, and living in Gloucester. | 0:22:10 | 0:22:14 | |
What? | 0:22:14 | 0:22:16 | |
I thought he was dead! | 0:22:16 | 0:22:19 | |
Ah! You see, the drummer wasn't dead at all, | 0:22:19 | 0:22:22 | |
he was found in Gloucester, | 0:22:22 | 0:22:24 | |
where he was arrested for stealing a pig? | 0:22:24 | 0:22:27 | |
There was no ghost at all? What is this, Scooby-Doo? | 0:22:27 | 0:22:31 | |
You can't have a ghost story where there's no ghost, right? | 0:22:31 | 0:22:35 | |
All that stuff about a drum banging itself, was that just made up? | 0:22:35 | 0:22:38 | |
All this does, it just makes me look silly. | 0:22:38 | 0:22:41 | |
I didn't spend two weeks at drama school's summer camp | 0:22:41 | 0:22:44 | |
to end up doing this sort of rubbish. | 0:22:44 | 0:22:46 | |
Unbelievable. | 0:22:46 | 0:22:47 | |
One of our most famous Roman generals was called Julius Caesar, | 0:22:54 | 0:22:58 | |
he went all the way to the top, but what goes up, must come down. | 0:22:58 | 0:23:03 | |
Don't miss this week's News Of The Empire exclusive, | 0:23:03 | 0:23:07 | |
it's our Caesar special. | 0:23:07 | 0:23:09 | |
He defeated the Gauls in France, and invaded Britain. | 0:23:09 | 0:23:12 | |
I came, I saw, I conquered, I... | 0:23:12 | 0:23:15 | |
oh, oh, oh ..I caught a cold, the weather was terrible, | 0:23:15 | 0:23:19 | |
so I came home again. Atchoo! | 0:23:19 | 0:23:21 | |
Now, Rome's greatest general has gone from hero to zero, | 0:23:21 | 0:23:26 | |
yes, JC's reputation is in meltdown, | 0:23:26 | 0:23:28 | |
because he started going out with the Queen of Egypt. | 0:23:28 | 0:23:31 | |
Has Cleopatra really stolen his heart? | 0:23:31 | 0:23:34 | |
So what if she has? My wife won't mind. | 0:23:34 | 0:23:37 | |
We reveal the truth behind the rumours. | 0:23:37 | 0:23:39 | |
Has Cleo really had Caesar's baby? | 0:23:39 | 0:23:42 | |
Well, here's a clue, he's called Caesarean. | 0:23:42 | 0:23:45 | |
He has got my nose, I suppose. | 0:23:45 | 0:23:47 | |
BABY CRIES | 0:23:47 | 0:23:49 | |
-Oh, there, there, it's not that big. -All right! | 0:23:49 | 0:23:53 | |
Plus, it's a fashion faux pas, | 0:23:53 | 0:23:56 | |
as Caesar is spotted wearing these red boots, | 0:23:56 | 0:23:59 | |
just like the last King of Rome. | 0:23:59 | 0:24:01 | |
We ask, is Caesar getting too big for his own boots? | 0:24:01 | 0:24:05 | |
I just like the colour. It doesn't mean to say I want to be King. What? | 0:24:05 | 0:24:09 | |
OK, so I have declared myself dictator for life, but... | 0:24:09 | 0:24:12 | |
And exclusive, the knives are out for Caesar. | 0:24:12 | 0:24:15 | |
In our assassination pull-out special, | 0:24:15 | 0:24:17 | |
we list the Senators plotting to stab him in the back. | 0:24:17 | 0:24:21 | |
-Wait a minute, who wants to kill me? -Find out tomorrow. | 0:24:21 | 0:24:24 | |
No, no, no, seriously, who wants to kill me? | 0:24:24 | 0:24:26 | |
Only in this week's News Of The Empire, a cracking good read, | 0:24:26 | 0:24:30 | |
although it is all in Latin. | 0:24:30 | 0:24:33 | |
It's true, Caesar started wearing red leather boots, | 0:24:33 | 0:24:36 | |
just like the ancient Roman Kings, | 0:24:36 | 0:24:38 | |
and they were hated by the people of Rome. | 0:24:38 | 0:24:41 | |
The last one, Tarquinius Superbus, had been so evil, | 0:24:41 | 0:24:45 | |
they got rid of kings altogether. | 0:24:45 | 0:24:48 | |
Hey! Good name though, Superbus. Rattus Superbus. | 0:24:48 | 0:24:53 | |
I rather like that, suits me. | 0:24:53 | 0:24:55 | |
Anyway, Caesar really put his foot in it, and ended up, well, | 0:24:55 | 0:24:59 | |
getting assassinated. | 0:24:59 | 0:25:01 | |
Hello, and welcome to another Crimewatch BC. | 0:25:05 | 0:25:09 | |
Now, we start this week with a murder, | 0:25:09 | 0:25:11 | |
which took place right in the centre of ancient Rome. | 0:25:11 | 0:25:15 | |
The victim was this man, Julius Caesar, a soldier and politician, | 0:25:15 | 0:25:19 | |
who was recently made dictator of Rome for life. | 0:25:19 | 0:25:22 | |
It seems Mr Caesar may have known he was a possible target. | 0:25:22 | 0:25:27 | |
On the morning that my husband, Caesar was murdered, | 0:25:27 | 0:25:30 | |
I had warned him not to go to the Senate. | 0:25:30 | 0:25:32 | |
All the omens were bad, they were really bad. | 0:25:32 | 0:25:36 | |
Don't go, Caesar! I don't want you to go. A few weeks ago, | 0:25:36 | 0:25:39 | |
a bird flew into the Senate house with a laurel leaf in its beak. | 0:25:39 | 0:25:43 | |
-So what? -Well, it's a warning. | 0:25:43 | 0:25:46 | |
What, a warning that it might poo on someone's head? | 0:25:46 | 0:25:49 | |
No, it's a warning that someone's going to get killed, | 0:25:49 | 0:25:52 | |
someone wearing a crown of laurel leaves on their head. | 0:25:52 | 0:25:55 | |
What? That is just superstitious nonsense. | 0:25:55 | 0:25:58 | |
I've got a feeling something really bad's going to happen. | 0:25:58 | 0:26:01 | |
Oh, yeah, maybe you're right, | 0:26:01 | 0:26:04 | |
maybe something really, really bad is going to happen, yes. | 0:26:04 | 0:26:08 | |
Oh, look, SMASH | 0:26:08 | 0:26:09 | |
it just did. Brilliant. See you later. | 0:26:09 | 0:26:12 | |
Caesar ignored the bad omens, and went to the Senate House anyway. | 0:26:13 | 0:26:18 | |
He was murdered there in broad daylight on the 15th of March. | 0:26:18 | 0:26:22 | |
-Take that, Caesar! -Ow, that's me you're stabbing! | 0:26:23 | 0:26:26 | |
Well, I don't know, all I can see is togas! | 0:26:26 | 0:26:28 | |
-Ow, you did it again. -Sorry! | 0:26:28 | 0:26:31 | |
I have with me in the studio, a man who saw the whole thing happen. | 0:26:31 | 0:26:36 | |
So, why do you think so many people stabbed Caesar? | 0:26:36 | 0:26:40 | |
I think the murderers thought it would be everyone's responsibility, | 0:26:40 | 0:26:44 | |
we'd all be in it together. Sorry, they'd all be in it together. | 0:26:44 | 0:26:47 | |
Any idea why THEY did it? | 0:26:47 | 0:26:49 | |
I'm told they thought Caesar had too much power and wanted to be a King, | 0:26:49 | 0:26:53 | |
so Caesar had to die! | 0:26:53 | 0:26:55 | |
Well, that's what some people thought, anyway. | 0:26:55 | 0:26:58 | |
Oh, must remember to do the washing up. | 0:26:58 | 0:27:01 | |
Also with me in the studio is the man leading the hunt | 0:27:01 | 0:27:05 | |
for Caesar's murderers, Senator Mark Antony. | 0:27:05 | 0:27:08 | |
Now, Senator, what do we know about the murderers? | 0:27:08 | 0:27:11 | |
Well, Kirsty, one thing we do know is their identities. | 0:27:11 | 0:27:16 | |
There's Casca and Cimber. Then there's the ringleaders, | 0:27:16 | 0:27:19 | |
Brutus and Cassius. | 0:27:19 | 0:27:21 | |
So, you know who did it, what next? | 0:27:21 | 0:27:23 | |
Well, we'd very much like to speak to them, | 0:27:23 | 0:27:26 | |
just a little chat to see if they can assist us in our enquiries. | 0:27:26 | 0:27:30 | |
-Really? -No, we want to kill them and burn down their houses, | 0:27:30 | 0:27:33 | |
but I don't want to say that in public, just in case they run away. | 0:27:33 | 0:27:37 | |
See ya! | 0:27:37 | 0:27:39 | |
Me and my big mouth. | 0:27:39 | 0:27:41 | |
I should probably run after him. | 0:27:41 | 0:27:43 | |
Go. | 0:27:43 | 0:27:44 | |
Want to travel through the time sewers with me? | 0:27:49 | 0:27:52 | |
Then play Horrible Histories terrible treasures. | 0:27:52 | 0:27:55 | |
Go to the CBBC website, and click on Horrible Histories. | 0:27:55 | 0:27:59 | |
E-mail [email protected] | 0:27:59 | 0:28:02 |