Bell Boy Bot Hotel Trubble

'Welcome to Hotel Trubble. Meet Sally, our receptionist.'

I'm trying to have a conversation!

'And this is Lenny. He's a man of many talents.

'This is Dolly. She's Mr Trubble's...umm...fiancee.

'And this is Mrs Poshington, the new cleaner.'

Which just leaves me, Jamie. I'm the bellboy.

# Hotel Trubble forever

# It's the pits and we know

# We're stuck but we love it

# Hotel Trubble forever

# We're a team staying calm Arm in arm

# So the hotel survives

# Trubble, Trubble

# Keep the hotel alive. #

Jamie, it's not up to you. Or me. It's in the hotel rule book.

-What hotel rule book?

-This one.

Every hotel in the world lives by this.

Look.

"All employees must take their allotted holiday days.

"Even you, Jamie. Don't roll your eyes and tut."

-Sttt!

-It's the perfect time to go away. We don't have any guests.

-We won't miss a thing.

-Yes, I will.

Jamie, it's time to take a holiday and that is final.

Where am I going to find somewhere to go at such late notice?

-You could try the internet.

-Lenny, that's a good idea!

-Yes!

I knew I'd have another one. My last one was in 2002.

The key-ring earring. Stylish and useful.

"Showing one of one suggestion." That might be interesting.

-Have you found somewhere?

-Yeah.

Great! Off you go then!

-Hang on. I haven't even packed my bags yet!

-Don't worry. All done.

Why did you pack all my stuff?

That's not important right now. You're all ready!

Did you want Teddy Tickles or Monkey Snuggles?

This is a total invasion of my privacy!

Monkey Snuggles, please.

-Goodbye, then.

-I'll be off, then.

Bye, Sally.

-See you, Lenny.

-No, Jamie! Why do you have to leave? Why, Jamie, why?!

I know how you feel, mate.

I can't tell you how painful it's going to be to walk out of here.

Argh! Lenny, what have you been polishing the floors with?!

We ran out of polish so I used the leftover lard from the kitchen.

-Lard?!

-All right, Jamie. You don't have to worry about lardy floors.

-You're on holiday! Goodbye!

-Goodbye, my friends.

Hello, sir. Would you like to check in?

-Yes, please.

-It's Jamie.

Jamie! Aw, you're back! You're back!

And you're fun, as well!

-Did you forget something?

-Nope!

I have decided to take my holiday here at Hotel Trubble.

-But just as a guest, so I don't want any special treatment.

-OK.

-What are you doing here, Jamie?

-Checking in to my holiday hotel.

-What, here?

-Hmm-hmm.

-That'll be for me. I'll go. Sally, key for Jamie.

Can you just go up to your room, please. Yeah, great.

Everyone!

I have an announcement. Drum roll, please.

Meet the future of hotel staffing.

-ROBOTIC VOICE:

-Greetings, humans. May I take your bags?

Dolly, what is that?

This is the Bellboy-Bot 3000.

Congratulations! You're one of the first hotels

to experience the Bellboy-Bot 3000.

Bellboy-Bots are friendly, obedient and easy to use.

They came with a large, pre-loaded hard-drive of hotel-based skills.

Such as...

You can download extra skills onto your Bellboy-Bot.

Such as West End theatre acting.

To Bellboy-Bot or not to Bellboy-Bot?

The potential skills for your Bellboy-Bot are limitless.

Remember to supervise your robot at all times

when plugged into the internet.

And enjoy your Bellboy-Bot.

-So what do you think?

-Amazing!

-Fantastic!

-Ridiculous!

-These robots are only the prototype.

I've managed to get us to the top of the waiting list for testing.

-We're bound to win this year's HIYA!

-This year's what?

This year's HIYA! The Hotel Improvement of the Year Award.

An accolade handed to the best hotels in the world by Hi Magazine.

-Out now!

-Hi Magazine?

Out now!

Never heard of it.

Winning the HIYA will put Hotel Trubble on the map.

Oh, no need. I've already done that. Look!

The HIYA judge is coming here tomorrow, and when he sees our robot

he's bound to declare us the most amazing hotel in the world.

Mr Trubble is going to be so pleased with me.

-Sally, you can't think this Bellboy-Bot is a good idea?

-Well...

Yeah, it's pretty cool.

Tell me, Lenny. What would be your least favourite job?

Emptying bins and throwing out all the rubbish.

Bellboy-Bot. Throw out all the old rubbish.

Leave me alone!

You horrible monster!

Bellboy-Bot. I meant rubbish from the bins.

-Although I take your point.

-How rude!

A robot bellboy! I never thought I'd see the day!

You're not great with technology, are you, Mrs P?

I mean, what happened to this expensive Mini-Vac I bought you?

-I think it's broken.

-It's not the first thing you busted around here.

I'm sure I don't know what you mean.

And Jamie. Your bellboy jacket, please.

Fine. I'm wearing my favourite T-shirt underneath it anyway.

That's your favourite T-shirt?

-Yeah. Don't know why. I just like it.

-OK.

Bellboy-Bot. Show our guest to room 16.

-Get moving, dummy!

-Get off me! Oi!

-Isn't he great?

-Faster!

-And so simple to use.

-An idiot could look after him.

-Oh, great!

-Count me in then.

-OK. I've got to go to the hairdresser's.

I've got to look my best for the HIYA judge. Be careful with him.

And download lots of skills but only stuff that the hotel really needs.

-Your room, sir.

-Yes, I actually know this hotel better than anyone!

I can walk around here with my eyes closed.

# Slowly, gently Night unfurls its splendour

# Grasp it, sense it... #

Ah, yes, see, this... this is the bathroom.

That is the wardrobe.

Yeah, I know. I just wanted... a dressing gown. I'll put this on.

-Dummy.

-I don't see what's so special about you, that's all.

I am the Bellboy-Bot 3000. My skills are surpassed by no-one.

Well, I am the "Jamie 2011" and no-one surpasses

my bellboy skills in this hotel, mate.

For example...

If a guest enters their room to find it unsatisfactory,

I, with my advanced superior knowledge of this hotel,

would know where to locate a dustpan and brush.

It's just in the cleaning cupboard.

Here it is.

Yeah, I can't do that.

Downloading. Receiving skills.

Oh, this is brilliant. It's like giving our robot super powers.

Yeah, but, Lenny, I'm a bit bored of downloading sensible skills.

-Let's find something fun.

-Dolly said to download skills the hotel needs.

Yeah, and what's one thing that the hotel really needs?

All the brickwork replaced by doughnuts!

Yeah, but the hotel really needs a bellboy robot

that can do brilliant impressions.

-Great idea!

-OK.

Downloading. Downloading.

Bellboy-Bot. Show us your SuBo!

-ROBOTIC VOICE:

-# I dreamed a dream in time gone by

-# When hope was high and life... #

-He sounds just like her!

-Bellboy-Bot. Do your Brucie!

-Yeah, good one!

I am not doddery, doddery I am...

-Not!

-Not!

-Look at his chin!

-Guys, hello...

Keep dancing.

This couldn't be more painful.

Argh!

Nice to see you, to see you nice!

-Hi, Jamie!

-Have you been polishing the floor with lard again?

No! Course not. You told me not to. It was custard instead.

-Lenny, please don't polish the floor with custard.

-Why not?

Woah! That is a hairstyle!

-Jamie! Bellboy-Bot is so funny!

-Yes, I've heard.

-Yeah, don't worry about him, guys. He's a bit jealous!

-I am not!

-Oh, Jamie!

-Aww, Jamie!

-You are jealous!

-How can you not find that funny, do you know what I mean?!

-Aww, Jamie.

Look, Jamie. I've had enough of this nonsense.

Bellboy-Bot is nothing but good for this hotel.

Lenny, Sally, get back to work. Jamie, get back to your holiday.

-Why's this thing not working?!

-All right, Jamie, keep your shirt on.

That remote's not working because I've taken out the battery.

-Why do that?

-Well, it turns out that my Mini-Vac hasn't been working

because I haven't put a battery in it.

So, I was looking to see if I could find one around here that would fit.

-No luck, I take it?

-No.

I may be old-fashioned but what I say is the human touch

is so much better than some fancy machine.

Hear, hear. That's just how I feel, Mrs P, about that stupid robot.

Woah! What are you doing? Sneaking up on me!

-Would you like something to eat, sir?

-Go on, then.

I'll have everything on the menu, please.

Yeah! Thought that would make you scarper!

Not so clever now, hey?!

Enjoy your meal! Ha-ha!

You...!

Woah! What are you doing?! Stop!

What is going on in here? Mrs P!

-No, Dolly, listen!

-Did someone scream in a really irritating voice?

-Mrs P, all I asked you to do was tidy one room.

-But I already did.

-It was your robot, Dolly.

-Really?

-Yes.

Aw! What?

This same fabulous robot? You are so jealous!

Sally, I think there's something really wrong with this robot.

-How about a robot disco?!

-Yes!

DANCE MUSIC

If I tell you, then it won't be a secret, will it!?

I'll speak tomorrow.

-Yeah, bye, darling, bye. Boys! Where's Sally?

-She's gone.

We've decided that I'll look after Bellboy-Bot.

-All right, Lenny. Stay awake and don't let me down.

-I won't, Dolly.

I mean...no, I won't let you down cos I'll stay awake with the...

She's gone.

LULLABY PLAYS

That music's making me really, really tired.

No, come on, Lenny, stay awake!

That's better.

-Sleep!

-No, it's not.

Downloading.

See, Dolly. Told you.

Bellboy-Bot has tricked Lenny to sleep and now he's up to no good.

# Danger! Danger! High voltage! When we touch, when we kiss

# Danger! Danger! High voltage! When we touch, when we kiss

# When we touch Danger! Danger! High voltage!

# When we touch, when we kiss Danger! Danger! High voltage!

# When we touch, when we kiss When we touch, when we kiss... #

It's all the evidence I need.

What?!

Poor Bellboy-Bot.

Lenny!

Len-n-n-n-ny!

Oh! Morning, Sally! Is that breakfast?!

Arrrgggghhh!

It's showtime!

Who did this? On the day the judge is coming!

-This is Bellboy-Bot's work, Dolly.

-Don't be ridiculous.

Whoever did this got to Bellboy-Bot too. Look at him!

That's what he wants you to think. I've got the proof right here.

Look. Watch this.

# Stupid r-o-o-o-bot

# I caught the stupid robot!

# Boom boom. Boom. Got the robot. #

Now, Monkey Snuggles, freestyle. # Ooo, ugh, yeah! #

Ha-ha! Nice moves!

I was... It was a dance that I was doing...

I must have taped over the footage by mistake.

That was Bellboy-Bot and he had two heads, yeah.

And he took one of his heads off

and then he just started, like, programming himself.

Rubbish! He's exactly where I left him. He hasn't moved.

-You did this, Jamie. To sabotage my plans.

-Don't be silly.

Ever since he got here, you've tried to undermine him.

This has gone to far. Maybe you should leave.

-No, you can't make me.

-Yes, I can.

You're just a guest here and the management, namely moi,

can chuck out whoever I like.

-Lenny? Sally?

-No, you've changed, Jamie.

OK, well, if that's what you want, I'll go.

KNOCK KNOCK

-Sorry, do you mind if I change first?

-Get out!

Don't worry. We're much better off without him.

In fact, why don't you two take the day off as well?

-What do you mean?

-Holiday. Go on, both of you.

Bellboy-Bot, the HIYA judge will be here any minute,

so clean up all this mess in double-quick speed!

-No.

-See, Bellboy-Bot is the only one I actually need.

Sorry? Come again?

-I refuse to do your bidding.

-Don't be silly, Bellboy-Bot.

Bellboy-Bot, what are the recent downloads on this system?

-Cunning, evil plan formulation.

-Oh, no!

-Total hotel domination.

-This can't get any worse!

-And Jedward's Greatest Hits.

-No!

Oh, he's cute.

It's got two heads. Shut down, Bellboy-Bot. Shut down.

You must leave my hotel now.

Now, you listen here. This is not your hotel. And we are not leaving.

You want to get rid of us, you'll have to pick us up and lock us away.

Help!

-Who are you?

-I'm Derek.

Uh-oh!

From Hi Magazine.

Out now!

-Hello! We spoke on the phone.

-Where are you?

Up... I'm speaking to you via one of our talking doors...

-It's one of our great new innovations.

-Talking door, eh?

-Excellent.

-I am the Bellboy-Bot 3000.

-My skills are surpassed by no-one.

-Wow! That is very good.

Unless you leave now, I will tear you apart. That is not so good.

-Don't worry, Derek. I'm in charge.

-Wrong, I am in charge.

-We'll see about that.

-Be careful!

SUPERMAN THEME

-Rival bellboy, you must leave now.

-I will never leave this hotel.

Can I take your bags for you, sir?

No, I am the bellboy here.

Well, if you want that bag, you'll have to get to it first.

So be it, rival bellboy.

WESTERN MUSIC

Slipping. Slipping. Danger. Danger.

'Have you had an accident at work?

'Have you slipped on something while working as an evil bellboy?

'Then call our claims department right now.'

-Hiya!

-Hiya!

-I hope you're enjoying your visit so far.

-How did you beat Bellboy-Bot?

-It took skill, courage, determination

and a puddle of marmalade you left on the floor there.

Have you been doing some polishing again, Lenny?

I have but I've not been using marmalade. No, it was apricot jam.

-Good choice.

-Jamie, I don't know what to say.

-No need to thank me.

I am the bellboy of Hotel Trubble. And nothing,

not even a stupid, ridiculous robot, is going to stand in my way.

-He's standing right behind me, isn't he?

-Yeah.

-Mummy!

If I cannot rule Hotel Trubble, I shall destroy Hotel Trubble.

That's ridiculous.

What skill would he possibly have to destroy this big hotel?

-Activate "destroy big hotel" skill.

-Yeah, that will do it.

Demolition commencing in five...

Do something!

-Four...

-Lenny, is there anything in the manual?

-There's a nice recipe for lasagne.

-Lenny, that's a cookbook!

-Three...

-It's all my fault. He's going to destroy us.

Sally, there's something I've been wanting to tell you.

Now seems like as good a time as any. Look, Sally...

-Two...

-Yes, Jamie?

-One...

Anyone noticed how this countdown's taking longer than five seconds?

-You know, with all the talking and gaps and stuff...

-Lenny!

Zero!

She's got his battery!

Ah-ha! I think I've just fixed my Mini-Vac!

Mrs P, you saved us!

Let's get this place cleaned up! I'll help you, Mrs P.

How are you enjoying your visit to our lovely hotel?

Considering the poor level of service

and the general threat to my safety from the...

evil, marauding robot,

I would say HIYA nomination refused.

Ah, yes, but that is what our latest innovation is all about.

We call it the Hotel Trubble Danger Robot Experience.

Technology meets fantasy in a simulated world to excite

even the bravest of thrill seeker. Like yourself, of course!

Very clever indeed. Definitely worthy of a HIYA.

-Yay!

-So there we are, congratulations!

-Well, it was Dolly's idea.

-Oh, no, no, it was a team effort.

Let me explain it to you over a cuppa, Derek.

Can you explain to me how you get these talking doors to work?

-Um...maybe later.

-Um...

Jamie, what were you going to ask me before

when you thought the robot was going to destroy us?

Nothing much. Just something about Monkey Snuggles.

Oh, yeah, that's cute.

PHONE RINGS

Phone's going. You should get that. Go on.

Lots to do around here, people. Lots to do.

Hello, Hotel Trubble.

# Hotel Trubble forever

# It's the pits and we know

# We're stuck but we love it

# Hotel Trubble forever

# We're a team staying calm Arm in arm

# So the hotel survives

# Trubble, Trubble

# Keep the hotel alive. #