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-# Jac. Jac. A dog, not a cat

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-# A friend of yours

-and a friend of mine

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-# Jac. Jac. A good little boy

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-# Jac Russell's the name #

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-Mam,

-tonight's homework is impossible.

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-Ask Jac for help.

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-Mam...!

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-Elin's homework is impossible.

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-APPLAUSE

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-Hold on. Are you clapping

-because I fell or because I'm great?

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-Because you're great.

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-Because you're great.

-

-Yay.

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-Hiya!

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-Who's this?

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-Who's this?

-

-This is my homework.

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-This? This?

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-He's impossible.

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-He's impossible.

-

-Impossible?

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-Listen here...

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-Argh, you're too heavy.

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-Listen here...

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-Listen here...

-

-Jac.

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-Listen here, Jac... No, no, J...

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-Jac's my name.

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-Jac's my name.

-

-Mine, too.

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-Ow! Well, Jac...

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-..Russell or Jac R-r-r-r-r-r-ussell.

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-I've made a note of everything

-I've done in my diary.

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-Hmm, tea.

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-Right, with the Davieses, I visited

-Oakwood. Here I am on Speed.

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-Here I am in the Millennium Stadium

-with the Monster Trucks.

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-Help!

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-With the Thomases, I went to

-see the Lion King in the West End.

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-A bit far-fetched

-but the songs were fantastic.

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-# Ah

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-# Ice cream

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-# With sprinkles on top #

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-# Kumba-way, kumba-kumba-way #

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-Thank you.

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-Right then,

-what are we doing this weekend?

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-Fencing.

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-Ooh. That kind of fencing.

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-I think that went well.

-Watch out for the over-acting, Dad.

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-Needs a wig!

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-That's what dogs do.

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-Jac Russell, Elen's bedroom, Take 1.

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-Don't think you can come

-into my bedroom again.

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-Yeah. Don't.

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-Are you a real dog, Jac Russell?

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-Of course I am.

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-Of course I am.

-

-Oh!

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-You don't look like...

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-You don't look like a real dog.

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-I'll prove it to you.

-Pass me a stick.

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-I've got some stick insects.

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-Look.

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-Sticks with legs?

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-Come on then, off we go.

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-No. They're pets.

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-Carmarthen children - funny children.

-They keep sticks as pets.

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-Come on, what can you throw?

-Find something. Fetch!

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-A-ha.

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-Fetch.

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-What are you doing?

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-Jac Russell!

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-HE BREAKS WIND

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-You can chew that one.

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-And that one.

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-Do you have

-any more interesting pets?

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-Like a remote control snake?

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-Or a cushion kangaroo?

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-Boing, boing, boing.

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-No, but we do have a rabbit.

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-Normal.

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-Normal.

-

-Kevin.

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-What do you want?

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-Is there anything in the paper?

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-This? Oh, no, not really.

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-But I did find these - chips!

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-Who's this?

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-Who's this?

-

-Kevin - Jac. Jac - Kevin.

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-Kevin was my homework last year.

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-Oh! Your homework.

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-You come from Ysgol Llanpumsaint too.

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-Yes.

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-Why are you still here?

-Why didn't you return to the school?

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-HE BELCHES

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-Up early every day to do sums

-and share a class with smelly kids?

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-Oi!

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-What's on the box?

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-What's on the box?

-

-It's broken.

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-What?

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-What?

-

-The television has broken down.

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-What are we going to do tonight?

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-Have you heard this one?

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-What is my favourite dance?

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-I don't know, Kevin,

-what is your favourite dance?

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-Hip hop!

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-You should be on television.

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-Yeah, yeah.

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-On television.

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-I've just had a great idea.

-I could tell jokes.

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-I could do cookery programmes.

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-What are jokes?

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-I could tell jokes.

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-I could do cookery...

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-I could tell jokes.

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-I could do cookery programmes.

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-I could do sport.

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-I could do... I could do Cefn Gwlad.

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-Dear me.

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-What do you feed these? Cake?

-Which ram will these have?

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-What's on S4/Jac tonight?

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-Jac Russell.

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-Here you are.

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-It's very quiet upstairs.

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-They're probably busy

-doing their homework.

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-Job done. And that doesn't mean

-I've been to the toilet!

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-Right, your colour was fading,

-so I topped it up.

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-I did some work

-on the noise level...

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-..and you don't have

-BBC, ITV or Sky any more.

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-How can a dog fix a television?

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-Ah, well, it was very difficult.

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-Your television

-had a lot of bad habits.

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-Bad jokes, bad acting -

-especially on Pobol y... Pobol y...

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-Oh, and the weather

-was so miserable, rain all the time.

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-I promise sun, sun and more sun.

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-It's always sunny on S4/Jac.

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-Mam, Dad, the television is working.

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-Right then.

-Let's catch up with the news.

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-Hey.

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-BIG BEN CHIMES LOUDLY

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-LOUD CHIME

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-LOUD CHIME

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-LOUD CHIME

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-Good evening.

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-Good evening.

-

-Cue!

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-Good evening.

-Here are the news headlines.

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-I have a slight cold

-and I had to visit the doctor.

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-That reminds me of the last time

-I visited the surgery.

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-"Doctor, doctor," I said, "I've

-swallowed a biro. What can I do?"

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-Wait for it.

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-"Use a pencil instead!"

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-Ha-ha-ha-ha!

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-The one on the right is so funny.

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-Over to the sports headlines.

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-Action.

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-Action.

-

-Thanks, Kevin.

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-A huge shock

-in Carmarthenshire's schools today.

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-Lunch was delicious.

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-Football.

-One team won, the other lost.

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-The winning team scored more goals

-than the losing team.

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-Ha-ha-ha!

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-Back to you in the studio, Kevin.

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-Thanks, Jac.

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-Fine...

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-Fine...

-

-Cue.

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-The...

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-The...

-

-Start when you're ready.

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-Any time now.

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-The Prime Minister was caught

-stealing milk from a cow...

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-..and the Titanic was seen

-floating in the sea.

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-Fuel prices will fall

-before rising again.

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-I can smell something nice.

-Is there a cookery programme on?

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-I like cookery programmes.

-Is Dudley on it?

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-There's no room for Dudley

-in this television. He's too big!

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-Where's that aroma coming from?

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-Go away!

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-Oh!

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-Ah!

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-Hi, I'm Jac Ramsay.

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-I'm going to show Elen

-how to cook a three-course meal.

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-It's easy, tasty and quick.

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-Yeah? Yeah?

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-Crisps. Pour.

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-Cheese & onion - eat.

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-Second course. Sandwich.

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-Bread. Cheese on the bread.

-Bread on the cheese.

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-Hand in the sandwich. Yeah? No.

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-Sandwich - eat.

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-Next, dessert.

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-Mini rolls. Mouth, open.

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-Eat. Cream.

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-Shake, finger, press.

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-Three courses. Amazing.

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-Ha-ha!

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-Next week, soup in a cup,

-Coco Pops with milk...

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-..and how to open

-a packet of Jammie Dodgers.

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-Perfect. Also next week,

-our favourite main course.

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-Potatoes flavoured

-with prawn cocktail in a bag.

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-Crisps again. Yeah?

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-Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cut.

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-Dog acting badly - Take 2.

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-Can you stop playing

-with the remote control?

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-Where have I gone?

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-Weren't you on the television

-just then?

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-No.

-How can I be in two places at once?

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-Would you like to see more news?

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-What are you doing?

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-What are you doing?

-

-There's no more news.

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-You told me

-I could tell a few jokes.

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-All I've had is boring news.

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-You're not funny.

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-You can't cook.

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-Can't!

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-Song!

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-# Who's the cutest dog in the world?

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-# Jac Russell, Jac Russell

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-# A ball of fluff that's always fun

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-# Jac Russell, Jac Russell

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-# Jac. Jac. A dog, not a cat

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-# A friend of yours

-and a friend of mine

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-# Jac. Jac. A good little boy

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-# Jac Russell's the name,

-tra-la-la-la-la-la #

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-Who says we have no talent in Wales?

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-Who says we have no talent in Wales?

-

-Entertainment at its best.

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-# His name is Jac

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-# He leaves a gift when he's angry

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-# Who's the cutest dog in the world?

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-# Jac Russell, Jac Russell

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-# A ball of fluff that's always fun

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-# Jac Russell, Jac Russell

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-# Jac. Jac. A dog, not a cat

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-# A friend of yours

-and a friend of mine

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-# Jac. Jac. A good little boy

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-# The name's Jac Russell,

-tra-la-la-la-la-la #

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-Ten out of ten.

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-Ten out of ten.

-

-The standard is so high on S4C.

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-I can't wait for the next programme.

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-I can't wait for the next programme.

-

-What are we going to do?

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-I don't want to be stuck

-in the television all the time.

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-Well, Jac,

-you got us into this mess.

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-Yes, Jac Russell,

-what are we going to do now?

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-There's only one thing for it.

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-That's enough.

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-Jac Russell, out.

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-Out you go.

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-This is all your fault.

-You've spoilt my weekend.

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-Don't push me.

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-How about one of these?

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-Ooh, children.

-Do you want to watch a cartoon?

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-Dad, the television isn't working.

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-Dad, the television isn't working.

-

-What's this then?

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-That's all, folks!

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-Can I come out now?

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-No, this'll teach you a lesson...

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-..for outstaying your welcome

-in people's houses.

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-Hey, listen to this one.

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-A man walks into a shop.

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-Ouch!

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-Walks into a shop!

-Did you like that one, Teddy?

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-Can I tell a joke now?

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-Go on then.

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-Knock knock.

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-Who's there?

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-Can I come out of the box please?

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-Can I come out of the box please?

-

-No!

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-S4C Subtitles by Simian 04 Cyf.

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-.

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