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Driver's Evil Ed League of Super Evil

Driver's Evil Ed

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Transcript

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It could be a problem with the hyperdrive rotary cover,

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-or maybe the quantum battery.

-What if you turned that shiny little...

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I'm thinking it's a problem with... Oh, who am I kidding?

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HE WHISTLES

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To the movie theatre, please. And an extra tip

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for every pedestrian you splash with water on the way.

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HE CACKLES

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-He-he.

-Ugh!

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-Aagh!

-Huh?

-Aagh!

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Red Menace.

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Quickly. Pull over.

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I'm feeling a little queasy.

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In case of emergency, please use the car sickness bags provided.

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El pest.

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Our target is in sight. Time to unleash...

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EVIL!

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Ner-r-r!

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HE ROLLS TONGUE, THEN BLOWS RASPBERRY

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Ha ha ha!

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In a surprise spit-ball attack, jump up and scream for revenge.

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Vengeance will be mine!

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Faster, Red, faster!

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HE MUTTERS

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Grr! If it's a spit-ball war that kid wants,

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then that's exactly what he's going to get.

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-You can't mean...

-Oh, yes I can.

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He's left me no choice. My mind is made up.

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Red Menace, the Doomsday straw.

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After him!

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It's slime time, kid!

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ALL: Whoaaaaa!

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Now I need a new straw!

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HE GASPS There!

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VOLTAR SUCKS ON STRAW

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A Wham-Bam meal for you.

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A Wham-Bam meal extra Bam for you.

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-And a treat of the week for you.

-Action Yak? I already have this one.

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I've got that spit-balling twerp right in my sights.

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Is there a problem, Officer?

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Licence, please.

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Licence... Uh! Uh! Who needs a licence?

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Do you have ANY idea who I am?!

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HE CHUCKLES SWEETLY Licence, right.

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Um... What if I told you we didn't...

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Oh, what do you say? Um...

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..HAVE a licence?

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If you want your golf cart back,

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you need to go downtown and get a licence. Have a nice day.

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In case of vehicle impoundment,

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please burst into tears.

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HE SOBS

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THEY WHISTLE MERRILY

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Ahem! The great Voltar is here for his licence.

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Take a number.

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-HE CLEARS THROAT

-Number one?

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Last call - number one.

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Ooh, ooh! That's me.

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Heroes or villains?

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-Please! What do you think?

-Heroes?

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HEROES?! Pah! We're villains.

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EVIL villains.

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Right, evil villains. Yeah, I see it now. You need that line.

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B-But there's nobody in THIS line!

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Oh, look. Shift's over.

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HE GASPS

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4,785?! Oh, for the love of all that's evil.

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Oh! 4,786.

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SNORING AND SPLUTTERING

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Aagh!

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What? Why, you...

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Waaaaargh! Oh!

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VOLTAR CACKLES

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4,786.

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Ooh!

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Huh?

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This is the written part of your driving exam. Time begins...now.

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HOOTER PARPS

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-Pfft! Some test!

-Frogg, wait.

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Hmm! I didn't even have to use the really smart part of my brain.

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Hmmm...

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VOLTAR GROANS

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Stop cheating!

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Hey... How are you doing that?

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Er... Doing what?

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Frogg, I need you to distract Red.

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Copy?

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'Copy that. Operation Distract Purple Rain is in effect.'

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Oh, no! I am under attack.

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Hi, Doktor Frogg.

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Time's up!

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Oh!

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You are now at the hardest stage of the test -

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the obstacle course.

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Hey! Ugh!

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What is the meaning of this?

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Regulations. Children must always ride in the baby seat.

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I am not a child! I'm a fully grown evil villain.

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THROUGH TEARS: Release me! RELEASE ME!

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Ooh!

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What a nice day for a drive.

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Pothole, 12 o'clock.

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-Ugh!

-Aaargh!

-Red!

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Aaaaarghh!

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Sorry! Send me the cleaning bill.

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Red, keep your eyes on the road!

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Is this the night-time portion of the test?

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Would someone explain why Skullossus got the front page

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and we're on page 14?

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-What are you doing?

-Why, I'm waiting for the nice old lady to cross.

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-Honk at her, Red!

-What?!

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No, Voltar!

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It's the ejector seat. But I can't remember which seat it ejects.

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Waaaaaargggghhh!

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CRASHING

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Voltar! You scared her, Voltar.

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Gah!

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Oh, no! It's Super-Amazing Man.

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Aargh! Get us out of here, Red.

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-HE GASPS

-He's gaining on us!

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I can tell by that painted-on expression that he means business.

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-Oh!

-Whoo-hoo!

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All right!

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Well? How did we do?

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The test is not over yet.

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You still have...the parallel park.

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ALL: The parallel park?!

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You must park your vehicle in the impossibly small space

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between those two cars.

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This requires someone with nerves of steel

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and the precision of a surgeon. That is why I, the great Voltar,

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will take the wheel.

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On second thought, why don't you drive, Red?

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ALL: Waaaarrrrghhh!

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GROGGILY: Well...do we pass?

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Hmm. You tried to cheat on your written test,

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destroyed the obstacle course, and to cap it all,

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completely obliterated three cars trying to park.

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Congratulations! You scored a perfectly evil A+.

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Here's your temporary licence. You'll get the official one by mail.

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Woo-hoo! We're back in the business of doing evil, boys!

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HE CACKLES

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-Woo! Our official super-villain drivers' licence.

-Let me see. Agh!

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This is an outrage! This is the worst picture of me, ever!

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You!

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Quickly, men. Go!

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-But your ripped up our licence.

-Well...

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It deserved to feel the wrath of my evil.

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Now, let's go!

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Come on. Go!

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What?! It was a bad picture.

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Ha ha ha!

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You're going down, you little saliva bandit!

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HE WHISTLES Taxi!

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Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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