Red Button Rampage M.I. High

FRENCH ACCENT: Putting an end to

Making wonderful peace with the whole world is a great idea

but to say that the British can do this, don't make me take a bath!

have invented the Disarmer.

An end to war because of some spotty kid's stupid invention. Never!

The old school spies have had their day and MI9 must create a new breed of skilled, undercover agent.

villain would think to look.

Templeman knew. It's research.

The kids' top 100 rich list.

MI9 are interested in number eight.

read about him in science journals.

He's developing this for the army,

If anybody launches a missile, it'll deactivate it before it lands.

General Scarp's responsible

We're going to protect Dylan? Cool!

I've arranged for Towser to come here, so we can keep an eye on him.

St Hope's isn't that big a war zone.

Ah! Doesn't it stir the blood?

the army needs men like you - men who can chuck up and buck up.

By the looks of it, most of them

fine young recruits for duty.

(This bird's gonna be a walkover.)

you miserable piece of scum!

And stand up straight before I make you all down into boot polish!

You. Drop and give me five.

I do not tolerate whingers.

like, anything pink or floral?

Drop and give you five? OK.

What's the betting that she's

help unload the truck. On the double!

this in the Territorial Army.

Pack your kitbag in under 30 seconds.

So, this is MI9 and a half?

Sir, is there any chance you can sign this for me please?

So, we've upped security on

Towser's scheduled to be at a test

report anyone entering the school.

I want you to identify any suspects

I want you to befriend Towser.

Fitted with a homing beacon.

And remember, for his own safety,

I'm sure there are other reasons you'd want to fraternise with him.

Sorry, "Join the army, it's great."

I mean, you're "Dylan Towser, the eighth richest kid in the country".

for his amazing inventions."

Yeah, I'm inventing a soldier that's

Oh, a thermal spectrometer?

keep you warm in the winter?

Daisy, if you're done kissing butt, they're giving away free make-up.

That stuff must be way expensive.

You should join 'em, before they blow dry their hair with bazookas.

I didn't guess you were a spy for about, what, 10 seconds.

because then I could zap you with some sort of anti-annoying device.

Look, I don't need protecting.

I didn't come in here to protect you, I came in here to check what...

Quick! Someone's trying to...

yourself a little more worthy.

Daisy's homing beacon, it's signalling from the boy's toilets.

Ha! Once a soldier, always...

Better start the clock again.

Sir, we've looked everywhere for Towser. There's no sign.

I'll head back to barracks,

organise a proper search team.

Aww. Some bodyguard you are.

If they knew wanted to kidnap me, school kid to look after me?

Cos I'm good at my job, that's why.

So it's not because you messed up?

nails and blisters everywhere?

Now you'll learn to work as a team.

We seem to be in a team full of really unattractive people.

maybe I could just read about

Sit in a nice, cosy library.

backside down this course so fast

I'll feel the wind from it!

if you create world peace, you destroy the need for an army.

Try yoga, it's meant to be calming.

I take it the demonstration's off.

and its inventor disappear,

the army's back in business.

Well, don't just lie there.

Well, don't just lie there.

but also maximum brain power.

You'll have to cross the shark infested waters and then find your

Tough either and you're out.

If she wanted us to build a bridge, why didn't she just give us,

how stupid's she, like, duh?

No-one came into school, I swear.

and you're watching my men load

We have to check all CCTV footage. It's fun playing spies, isn't it?

Hair-pins are like hankies.

It was my Disarmer he smashed.

And again, shuffle forward.

We'll never get through there.

We need to use a plank. What, you?

Hey! The geek is trying to speak.

the gap big enough to get through.

And you've only just realised?

no, it took months to build.

But now you know how to do it. There's nothing like a maniac with a missile for focussing the mind.

Look, Lenny, no one came into school but we reckon Daisy was taken

specs, he gave me an idea -

I can't believe I missed them.

just like our superiors when they

Do you love that uniform, Sergeant?

It does make my bum look big.

They will die as heroes, Sergeant.

And just what you've been waiting for, library boy, the assault course.

Excuse me, Mr Soldier people?

That wasn't part of the plan either.

So you're just going to do nothing?

Orders from someone who claims he dug out of jail with a pen.

into the launch console and

But I've only tested this thing on simulations, not real missiles.

I thought you were a Pisces?

The army's about having the guts

What about standing up for others?

There's somewhere I should be.

..we don't want you...crying out

might have - how you say in English?

I'm sure Mr Towser is ready to do

But I have the situation in hand.

nevertheless, if you're ready to activate the launch console?

We're at some sort of an army base.

You, Private, stand up straight!

look a superior officer in the eyes!

Permission granted to activate simulation missiles, General.

COMPUTER: Live missiles activated.

Sacre bleu! You have made it live, you stupid roast beef!

COMPUTER: Missiles launched,

Just like you'd crush the army with

I launched real missiles, I get scared in the dark... Scarp!

you'll realise you need men like me.

One and a squad of reinforcements.

It was a wrong number anyway.

10 seconds. Maybe we could try redirect the missiles somewhere safe.

Dylan, this thing's going to work.

Some hero he turned out to be.

Me! Look at him, we just stopped a war and he's still playing games.

or is Daisy not like the most bossy person you've ever met?

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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