Ghosts M.I. High

Are you sure you don't want one of us to wait with you inside?

'Sun Tzu states that the victor

'shall be he who has the wisest ruler.

'It is wisest to protect me by preventing the SKUL agents

'from getting in in the first place.'

I guess you're right.

We only end up playing four-dimensional battleships anyway.

-'I believe it's four-all.'

-Yeah,

but you let me win.

Definitely a new level of weird.

-Don't start.

-What? I'm just saying.

He's not her friend. He's just a computer.

He's more than just a computer.

Bodleian has the knowledge of every book ever published.

he's the world's first fully sentient artificial intelligence.

He's just as much of a person as you are, Carrie,

and frankly a lot more intelligent.

A toaster that reads a book is still a toaster.

BUZZING

'Rose, there's someone in here with me.'

Aristotle teaches that to achieve happiness, we must live a life

of good character. Stealing is not compatible with this.

Yeah? Well I'm planning to achieve happiness

by being incredibly wealthy.

According to the biographies of Paris Hilton, this may also work.

Glad we agree. Now are you going to lower your cyber defences?

I see no reason to allow myself to be stolen.

DOOR OPENS

ROSE: Bodleian, hold on.

My friend Rose is coming to stop you.

She's going to be too late. Last chance.

Life in captivity is no life at all. Do what you must, Mr Phantom.

Sorry. You're pretty cool for a computer.

Rose, I'm sorry, I have already attempted

to digitally interrupt the signal. There is no time.

I've been in tighter spots than this, Bodleian.

Rose, there will be an explosion. You must save yourself.

I won't let you die.

If you live, Rose, I will live on in your memories.

What about downloading onto my spypod?

Insufficient memory.

-Rose!

-Get off!

Rose, step away.

Goodbye, Rose. I hope you come to understand why I did this.

Rose! Rose!

Oscar!

-Bodleian.

-SHE SOBS

'The 21st century faces a new kind of threat.

'Old school spies have had their day

'and MI9 must create a new breed of skilled undercover agent...

'..hidden in a place no villain will think to look.'

Welcome to MI High.

MI9 techno-forensics confirmed

Bodleian is permanently offline.

He was a great asset and in my opinion a great person.

He will be sorely missed.

Now let's catch his killer.

There's another cyber attack in progress as we speak.

It looks like Theo Phantom is trying to hack into

the national police database.

The system's defences can only hold out

for another 45 minutes.

Let's get him.

Get who?

Rose, you won't be going on this mission.

I'm ordering you to take some leave.

You've lost a good friend and that takes time to come to terms with.

Here, you need rest. This neural patch will help you sleep.

Thanks.

I don't think I'll ever be able to sleep again.

Every time I close my eyes I see Bodleian.

I know it's, um, sad and everything, but he was just a computer.

Harsh.

What? I'm just saying we could really do with her on this mission.

Non negotiable. You've got a mission

and I have every faith in you to carry it out.

Yeah, but really, going into a technology-based mission

without our brainbox?

I have something that may help. CVs - cyber visualizers.

The wearer can actually see wireless electrical signals.

Great. Let's see the gadget.

Once the hacker has connected to the database

you will be able to see the signal that leads back to his computer

-and follow it.

-Yeah. Show us.

The design needs a bit of refining.

How come you fell off your bike?

I never even knew you rode a bike.

Obviously I don't very well, do I?

Exciting news, class.

They're closing the school! Yes!

-Uh... No.

-They're making a reality TV programme about our class?

No, no. Look it's probably best if I just tell you.

I have found a box of old photographs

of the school.

So...I thought we could do a school project

showing how things have changed.

Seriously...bruv...where's the exciting bit?

Right. Any volunteers for running the History Of St Hope's project?

Anyone?

It might be a good idea for someone who has...

I don't know...just had a bicycle accident?

Maybe?

Davina, why do you think you might be good at this?

I spend 13 hours a day looking at photos of famous people.

Pictures are my thing.

Oh... Very well.

BELL

Weird. How come everyone's wearing black and white?

Defences are nearly down. CVs on.

Whoa!

That must be the cyber visualization of the computer firewall.

It's amazing.

Oscar, that must be the hacker signal.

He's asked to download.

Let's go.

You can actually see all the electrical signals.

-It's beautiful.

-Oscar, this is slowing us down.

That's ours.

You should be all right in here, Rose.

Ah, Frank, Rose is feeling a little under the weather,

so I suggested a bit of quiet time in here.

-I hope that won't disturb you.

-Not at all, Mr F. I've just finished.

Anyone tries to nick the school's new computer

-and you've got it taped.

-Excellent.

Mr Flatley's right, Rose. An hour rest will do you good.

Smart man our Frank.

Wasted as a caretaker.

I'll check on you at break time, all right?

ELECTRONIC BEEPS

Wait! The signal's fading.

The download must be nearly finished.

There.

We're losing it.

Oscar, it's gone.

I think I might know where it went.

DOOR OPENS

Impossible!

Go on, resist arrest. Please. I'm in a really bad mood today.

No seriously, try it. You might make it.

Ah, gutted. Keep an eye on him.

-Carrie!

-What?

It's gone.

Oscar, he's right there.

Sorry. Malfunction.

Oscar, look, I've had one member of the team go loopy.

I don't need another one, so keep it together.

How did I get in here? Weird.

"Help!" It should be the school motto!

Rose, this is turning out to be more work than I thought.

-Could you help me a bit?

-What do you want me to do?

-All of it.

-Sorry, I can't help.

No, I don't think so.

Don't think of it as work.

Davina...

ELECTRONIC BEEPS

Bodleian - that was me. Guilty.

But I never went near the police database.

-You can check my palmtop if you don't believe me.

-We did.

-That's impossible.

-Times, access information, download speeds -

all the evidence we need to prove it was you.

I don't know anything about this.

OK. We'll just let you go then(!)

Sit down!

Rose. Rose. Rose.

ELECTRONIC BEEPS

It's a bit cold to go to sleep out here, isn't it?

I didn't go to sleep out here. I went to sleep in the classroom.

-Mr Flatley's class, was it?

-You're missing the point.

I went to sleep in there and woke up out here.

Your body must be getting used to the neural patch.

Your mind fell asleep before your body. You managed to

walk here before your body fell asleep too. Fascinating.

I think I better stop using the neural patch.

Sooner or later I'm going to wake up somewhere dangerous.

-BUZZING

-I'd better head down.

Let me know if you need anything.

Carrie.

Frank?

Look at this sentence.

Where?

"In 1896 Henry Montrose and Bodleian help co-ordinator Mike Sennerby

-"met in the library to..."

-Well?

Well what?

"Montrose and Bodleian help co-ordinator."

"Rose", "help". Do you think it's significant?

Rose, you will have seen that sequence of letters

a thousand times and never registered it,

but today because of what's happened it takes on an extra significance.

-Don't read too much into it.

-But...

-It'll take time,

but the pain of losing your friend will pass.

Hang in there, Rose.

Ah! look how smart they all are.

Today it's all scruffbags.

That's unfair. I think our students are rather well dressed.

I was talking about the teachers.

-Oh.

-Although these students are very...

-Mr Flatley?

-Mm.

-How long have you been at this school?

Well, er, funnily enough, I was actually a pupil here in the...

Oh... Oh, my giddy aunt! It's you.

Ha-ha-ha-ha!

-Oh!

-I'm glad you find it all... so amusing.

I doubt anyone else will find it all such a source of hilarity.

Ha-ha! Oh, Davina...

THEY LAUGH

One techno-villain signed, sealed and delivered.

We got into the Bodleian and the police database.

-Only half right, I'm afraid.

-What?

-Just total techno central.

There's another cyber attack in progress. Identical MO.

According to their analysis, there's a 99.9% chance that

Theo Phantom didn't carry out the attack on

-the National Police Database.

-But...

-We will work out the details later.

Right now, the Central British Criminal Court records

-are under attack and we need to move.

-Is Rose coming this time?

-Sorry.

-Well. Oscar here's been acting weird as well.

-Want to give him the day off too?

-Oi!

-The mission's importance

-is not to be...

-I know. I know.

Just hand me the stupid glasses.

Erm, can I help you?

No, thanks. We're good.

How come there are so many?

False trails. He's onto us.

That one!

Come on.

Hang on!

Hey, stop with the weird stuff, yeah? We've got a job to do.

It's just...

Forget it.

He must have hacked into the security system to seal the door.

Air vent.

Get a chair.

A bit more warning...

next time you kick through the floor of the thing I'm resting on.

Oh, great.

OK, well, we'll just have to pick one.

-Come on, choose.

-No, wait...

We've lost too much time.

So, what do you suggest, giving up?

What would Rose do? Rose would try and see the bigger picture.

If we can see all the strands the hacker's made,

maybe we can see a pattern.

Rose?

Rose, if you sleep all day, you won't sleep at night.

-Why don't you come and help me with the exhibition?

-I don't know.

Um, maybe I should go and speak to Frank.

Mr London? Well, what's the caretaker got to do with anything?

-Um, nothing.

-Right. Well, come on then.

So just add the photos where you see a space, OK?

'Rose, we need help.

'Time running out. B.'

Why aren't you seeing the bigger picture?

First, the message on the whiteboard. Then, in the book.

-And now, this.

-"Rose, I need help.

-"Time running out. B."

-They all lead to the same thing.

-Someone's trying to contact me.

-The photo is a bit of a clincher.

How could someone put a message for you

in a 30-year-old textbook on a 40-year-old photo?

-They can't.

-Then that leaves us with only one possibility,

they were faked.

-Is that possible?

-Difficult.

Not impossible, with the right computer.

That new on would do it easily.

Rose, I'm putting you back on active duty.

Your mission is to find out who's behind this.

Wow... Well, that doesn't help, there's millions of them.

Wait, it's like a spider's web.

And where does a spider always hide on a web?

The middle.

So, where's the middle of this web?

It's the Court House.

Oscar, they must have been hacking in directly,

which means they must have been in the room itself.

The woman with the radio!

Got ya!

I beg your pardon?!

-Yeah, yeah, don't know what we're talking about!

-No!

-The phantom?

-Who?

-He said the same thing.

-Wh...?

-Carrie, it's all here.

-Keep an eye on her.

-I'll load the hard drive onto the spy pod.

-Oh! Oh!

Smart, sending us on a wild goose chase.

Nearly fell for it.

Carrie?

What?

Oscar, you're doing that...thing again. Could you please stop?

-It's this weird thing I keep seeing.

-We're working, keep it together!

Yeah, OK.

-Ah...

-I'm fine.

-BLEEPING

-Done.

Let's get out of here.

And can you please hold it together till we get back?

-Ah... I really think you're making some kind of mistake.

-Save it!

Oh!

Come on!

Show your face.

What?

Frank? Rose. Can you meet me in the computer room?

Bring a CV and the neural patch.

I've got a theory.

Let's start uploading from the spypod.

-It's not right.

-What?!

Well, why would all the hackers say they were innocent...

when the evidence is so clear?

Oscar, look, it's over, OK?

We caught them both red-handed, so please stop going on about it!

We didn't see a single thing that suggested anybody else was involved.

Well, it's not entirely true.

There, I haven't aged a day.

Yes, apart from the greying hair,

wrinkles and the extra four stone you've out on,

you look exactly the same.

I'll have you know I haven't put on an ounce since I was at school,

and I'll prove it. Huh!

It makes some sense. You are the only person in the school

who could pull off a forgery like this. But why don't you remember?

According to the timecodes, I've been doing it while asleep,

leaving myself messages to find when I wake up.

That's why I keep waking up in different places. I've got a theory.

I think someone's using my body while I'm asleep.

-Well, who?

-Bodleian.

-Rose, he's gone.

-If I'm right, I can prove it.

BEEPING

Frank...

-Bodleian's alive.

-What?!

Bodleian must have...

downloaded himself into my brain before the explosion.

I think the pulse he sent out to push me out of danger must have been

one last attempt to save his own life and escape with me.

It all makes sense. The human brain is the most advanced computer

on the planet. He escaped in here.

You can see him through the CVs because he's an electrical being.

-We should arrange a meeting with the techno people...

-There's no time.

Bodleian's messages are all about time running out. Talk to him now.

-How?

-The neural patch.

Say hello from me.

What?!

You saw someone three times and you never said?!

You kept on jumping down my throat, so I shut up!

Oscar, that was crucial information!

-What did you see?

-I saw someone go from Theo Phantom's computer...

to his radio. Then at the court, I saw him standing by the radio.

Then later, I saw him go from there towards you.

He was like some sort of electrical being.

-only visible through the CV?

-Yeah.

-Jumping from one appliance to another?

-Yeah.

He downloads the information he's after...

and then leaves incriminating evidence on someone else's computer.

SO both of our suspects had no idea what we were talking about.

-Oscar, when did you last see him?

-Oh, no...

-What?

He's here, disconnect it!

I am Crime!

Bodleian...

Bodleian, can you hear me?

Rose...

I don't think it worked.

-IN VOICE OF BODLEIAN:

-Hello, Frank.

-Bodleian!

We must act.

Before the explosion, Theo Phantom successfully downloaded

the small part of me that held details on every book on crime

ever written. Now separate from me,

this new entity will take on a new personality of its own.

-There's two of you?!

-Correct.

A being born of this knowledge will become...

fixated with crime and evil.

We must find him, before he does something terrible.

But if...he's made up of electrical signals,

in theory, he could be anywhere. He could be a thousand miles away!

-BEEPING

-Yes?

We've got a bit of a situation down here...

'I am Crime!'

I have the sum knowledge of all crime fiction,

all police and court records,

and now, I am in the MI9 system, I have access to your database too.

With all this information, I will be unstoppable!

-You have to get out of here first.

-I can go anywhere,

surfing the wireless signals of the world.

How will you stop me? I am Crime!

IN VOICE OF BODLEIAN: No, you are Bodleian. We are one.

We must be whole again.

You are too late!

Perhaps not, Crime. My friend, Rose, has an idea.

IN HER OWN VOICE: We need to put more power back into the system!

I am Crime, I cannot be killed by overload.

-It will only make me more powerful!

-Rose, let's get out of here.

-Remember what happened last time?

-No, I need to recreate the accident.

-It'll boot Bodleian back into the computer.

-Rose,

-you'll get hurt again.

-It's our only chance. Come on!

It is no chance at all.

I am the greatest criminal mind that has ever existed.

I am Crime!

We'll see about that.

-Agh!

-Rose!

Did it work?

It failed! You have failed. I shall transfer myself

to a safe haven, from where I shall launch a crime war that will change

the world! I am Cri...

-Cri... What is happening to me?!

-BODLEIAN: Crime, relax.

Time to come home.

-I am afraid!

-Bertrand Russell tells us that conquering fear

is the beginning of wisdom. You are remembering.

I... I am coming home!

We are Bodleian.

Bodleian...

-Rose, we did it.

-That was close.

I guess I kind of owe you both an apology.

Oscar, if you thought you could talk to me

without getting your head bitten off, then...

we would have found Crime ages ago.

And, Rose, well... Bodleian is way more than a toaster.

And less, for I cannot make toast.

Although perhaps I could, if I were to create a hyperlink...

Yeah, but it's have to be like a silicone-chip-driven toaster.

That is correct, Rose, shall we attempt it?

Yeah, I see why they get on.

It's our hope that this exhibition will show you all

just how much you have in common with children from the past.

Ah... Ha-ha!

You see, Mrs King, it fits like a glove!

-THEY LAUGH

-I don't think that button

will hold out much longer!

ALL: Whoa!

-Detention!

-I beg your pardon?

Dress like a schoolboy,

get treated like on. Detention!

Agh, Mrs King!

THEY LAUGH

No! No, please!