The Old Man's Birthday Matilda and the Ramsay Bunch

-Hi, I'm Matilda!

-ALL:

-I'm Matilda! I'm Matilda! I'm Matilda!

I'm Matilda!

Cooking is what I love best.

-Ooh!

-Ho-ho-ho!

-She cooks, she scores!

-Hi, I'm Matilda.

-Goodbye, Jack.

I'm in charge of the kitchen in this house.

-No, no, Tilly.

-SHE SCREAMS

Get out of my kitchen!

This is a story of me, my crazy summer...

SHE SCREAMS

I'm on the red carpet and I'm about to meet the star of the movie.

..and my even crazier family.

-ALL:

-What?!

-Tilly rules, OK!

Om!

HORN HONKS

After our crazy Californian summer of full-on cooking...

Wow.

..blogging and mad cap adventures...

Matilda Ramsay!

..we're back in Britain, and I'm cooking a super-special meal.

It's Dad's birthday. He's 50. Yeah, it's a big one.

Can you imagine being 50-years-old?

It's like he's from the land of the dinosaurs.

Dad's having a big party later,

but I want to cook him a family meal to really remember.

So, I'm pulling out all the stops.

But the big question is...

-Hey, Till. Morning.

-Shh, be quiet, Mum and Dad are still asleep.

-WHISPERING:

-Sorry.

-Why don't you go and get Jack down?

-Shall I go call him?

-You go get Jack.

We're going to start Dad's birthday with a bang.

We've got to get 50 balloons. One for every year.

Sorry, he was about to have a shower.

Can you not give me, like, five more minutes?

Jack and Hols are on breakfast duties.

-Who's having bacon?

-Me!

DOG BARKS

Inside one of the balloons,

we're putting a message that invites Dad to a secret birthday party.

It's going to be fun, though. Dad will have to try

-and find the invitation himself.

-Breakfast is ready, everyone.

-Yay!

After breakfast, we sneak up the 50 balloons,

and one of them has got the invitation in.

OK, then, Megan, you're going to get the secret cab ready.

-JACK GASPS

-Wait, what?

-I'm Mum and Dad's chauffeur.

-Jack...

-Mm-hm?

-Me and you are going to go

and cook a fancy, three-star meal - like Dad.

Who is ready to make this birthday Dad's bestest ever?

-Me!

-Me!

Breakfast done, and plan of action sorted.

OK, guys.

Operation Birthday Bang is go.

DOG BARKS Keep the dog downstairs.

But we've got to be very quiet. Silently sneaking...

-BALLOON POPS

-Argh!

..up to Dad's room with 50 balloons...

OK, ready?

..and without him noticing.

BALLOON POPS

THEY SCREAM

What are you guys doing?

BALLOON POPS

THEY SCREAM

-This is so unfair! ALL:

-Happy birthday!

THEY SCREAM

You're an old man now.

In one of these balloons is something special.

-So, we've got to pop all these balloons?

-Yeah.

Ha-ha! This is definitely starting Dad's birthday with a bang.

-BALLOON POPS

-Argh!

-BALLOON POPS

-Argh!

Argh!

Argh!

-Oh, Dad! I found it!

-Let's have a look. Right, "Invitation to..."

-"..to a secret birthday location."

-"..birthday location.

"Your chauffeur will pick you up at exactly 12:30.

-"Dress to impress."

-Ooh!

-You're not wearing that hat.

-Yes.

# Happy birthday to you. #

Look at the mess.

-BALLOON POPS

-Oh, no!

Invitation delivered. Come on.

Jack and I are on a mission.

We pulled some strings and are heading to a super-swanky restaurant

to cook the poshest meal ever.

Superheroes in chef whites.

Looking the part, we're cooking with one of the best chefs in Britain.

-And it's going to be very chef-y!

-Whoa, Tills!

-Hi, Claire.

-Claire!

-Hey.

-So, we're here for a very special occasion.

Dad's 50th birthday. So, we want to make it quite posh -

-like his food.

-Love to help.

The most important thing is that it tastes great, right?

-Yeah.

-Yes.

-So, we would use more expensive, rare ingredients.

Precision is obviously a big difference.

The other thing is probably, like, time.

-So, some of the things that we make takes ages.

-Wow.

Well, if it takes ages, we'd better get going.

We need a starter that'll knock Dad's birthday socks off.

-Maybe some pasta.

-Ravioli, it's fun.

-OK, cool.

-I like it.

-Excellent.

-Nice.

-What do we want to put in it?

-Salmon?

-Yeah.

-Salmon and prawns?

-Delicious.

-Yeah.

-Sorted.

Jack and I get straight to work.

He cuts his salmon into small pieces that are exactly the same size.

And I do the same with the prawns. It's a chef-y trick.

When you're eating it, you can get, like,

all of the perfect bits in your mouth at the same time.

Claire chops chervil, coriander, and basil for a big herby hit.

Jack, your salmon goes in with my prawns,

-and, Claire, your herbs go in too, don't they?

-Yeah.

Add salt and pepper, then put in some delicious salmon mousse.

Salmon mousse is just salmon flesh,

put it a blender, little bit of cream and salt.

Squeeze in some lemon juice and mix.

Filling done, now to make the ravioli parcels.

Have you got any other chef tips to help us with this?

Yeah, precision is really important.

So, we make sure each one is all the same size.

Each ravioli has to have exactly 65g of filling in it.

-Is yours definitely 65g, Jack?

-No, that was 67.

Well, it's got to be 65.

I'm really getting into this precision business.

If only you could be like that with your homework, Tills.

How rude! Leave my homework out of this.

Now to make the pasta parcels.

First, crack an egg and get your sous-chef to work.

Whip it up, please. I'll get the pasta cut.

We're making big round raviolis. Ooh.

Cut a circle of pasta, then paint the whisked egg

around the edges like glue. Add the filling.

That one in the middle. Then put on another circle of pasta,

and seal it up. Aw! Beautiful.

This is going to be awesome, guys.

To make sure the dish wows Dad, we've got to perfect it.

Shall we just make one,

and we'll test it and see how it looks on the plate?

-Cool, sounds good.

-Good idea.

We're cooking ravioli in fish stock for precisely five minutes.

Now to get the dish looking fantastic.

First, a swirl of really tasty shellfish sauce.

-There you go.

-Oh, wow! Tilly, ravioli is coming out.

Thank you very much, Jack. So...

Right in the middle.

Now, add a spoon of delicious herby sorrel sauce.

-Nice.

-So it can to drip down the sides.

And finally, to give it the X factor, add some edible flowers -

not ordinary flowers.

I think Dad's going to love that.

I think he's going to love that, too.

One of the most important things about making these posh

-dishes is tasting. ALL:

-Aw!

-Look at that.

-Mm!

-That is actually amazing.

If I say so myself!

Guys, we are a great team.

Starter sorted.

I can't believe Dad won't be impressed with this.

-Back at home...

-That one.

Holly and Megs are making a birthday present for Dad.

Whoa, what was he thinking?

Using old photos, they're morphing him from a baby to a 50-year-old.

-Such a good present idea.

-I think so.

OK, guys. So, main course.

-A nice fillet of beef.

-Yeah.

Surrounded by colourful vegetables and a really delicious sauce.

You got your three different coloured carrots,

and you've got your rainbow chard.

Cut up the carrots nice and, like, circular.

I'm starting to get into being the head chef

and bossing my brother around.

Cut up the chard the same way.

My fillet of beef is wrapped in a special chef's clingfilm.

First, slice the beef, then fry in hot oil.

And it's professional clingfilm, so you can cook with it.

That makes me very happy.

Jack's favourite food is steak.

Jack, vegetables!

We're on a time schedule.

Because it's so hot, Claire takes the clingfilm off for me.

That's amazing. It looks so good.

Next, the vegetables.

Jack's parboiled carrots and sauteed Swiss chard.

Stirring it with a clove of garlic stuck on a fork

is another chef-y trick

It's a really good way to get a little bit of garlicky flavour.

This dish has got to look good.

We know Dad likes presentation.

So, I'm making sure it has a fab, fancy pants chef-y look.

Just like that.

With a Tilly twist, obviously.

I really want to make this really dramatic.

Is there any way you could make, like, smoke on it or anything?

Yeah, we can. I mean, like, we can do anything, right?

-Yeah.

-So, we have smoke. Yeah, look.

With Claire's professional know-how,

we're adding aromatic smoke under what chefs call a glass cloche.

So cool!

The plan is to take the dish to the table like this.

-Shall we do it?

-Yeah, let's do it. Lift up the cloche,

then add Claire's amazing beef sauce.

Yeah, smoke was a really good idea, Tilly.

Jack's finishing it.

If Dad's reaction is anything like Jack,

that's another dish in the bag.

Jack, Claire and I are in charge of cooking Dad's lunch.

But it's down to Megan and Holly to get him here.

Megan is going to be the secret chauffeur.

And to make sure she looks the part, Holly has got a surprise outfit.

Megan! There's a package for you.

A hat.

Gloves and a jacket

You're going to look just the part as a chauffeur.

You're missing one thing, OK?

There you go!

Holls, Megan doesn't just need a flower to finish off the look,

she needs a car. A great looking chauffeur needs an iconic vehicle -

the famous London taxi.

Her first fare is going to be a very important dad.

OK, guys. My favourite bit, dessert.

So, there's going to be some special effects.

-We're going to have dry ice, popping candy.

-Only proper special effects.

Let's get building. First, we're making minty chocolate ice...

Safety first. ..using liquid nitrogen.

Those are for you. That's going to go in.

And then we're going to get some liquid nitrogen.

Tilly, you look like a mad scientist.

I feel like a mad scientist. Ooh, it's cold!

Whoa! Cooking like this really rocks.

-So, she pours it in.

-Whisk?

-Argh!

THEY LAUGH

And you should definitely not do this at home.

Unless your grown-up is a professor and you have a laboratory.

That is crazy fun!

I haven't finished with the mad professor stuff either.

Now, I'm going to use some dry ice.

Yeah, real dry ice.

Dry ice around the little plate.

It's just for presentation - not eating,

but it's going to have an amazing effect when it's served.

Just you wait.

The mint snow onto the plate.

Chocolate ball on top and then inside, the chocolate mousse.

Pipe the chocolate mousse inside the ball...and your brother.

Urgh! That'll need a wash.

Next, add honeycomb for a crunch. And popping candy.

Finally, a scoop of delicious ice cream.

This looks so good.

Then simply pop on the top of the chocolate ball.

And tell your brother off. You need to stop eating it.

-Even though it's good.

-I have.

-Here we go. Go.

Jack adds water to the dry ice, setting off an incredible

special effect, and I pour hot chocolate sauce to melt the ball.

-Whoa!

-Look at that.

Professor Tilly's incredible chocolate ball.

HORN HONKS Car for Mr and Mrs Ramsay.

-Oh, Meg!

-Can you please get in and rack me up a big bill?

-Are you driving?

-Yes, can you please get in?

-Belts on, please. Everyone ready.

-You're my chauffeur!

-We're off.

-You're driving a black cab!

-Oh, my God. Slow-down, Meg!

Poor Meg's got a couple of terrible back-seat drivers.

Watch that silver car. Watch the silver car.

-Indicate!

-I know!

-After this one.

-All clear now.

-I have passed my test.

You're not teaching me any more.

Watch that white car, though, Meg.

-Beep the horn, please, Megan.

-No!

-OK.

Great drive, by the way.

Meg, thank you very much.

-Mum, Dad!

-Hey, birthday boy!

-Hello!

-Excuse me, this is...

-Happy birthday!

Thank you very much.

We've got this amazing restaurant all to ourselves.

Nanny! Grandma and Gramps are surprise guests.

What a lovely surprise.

Jack and I and Claire have prepared some very special

meals for you guys.

-Claire, you let them in the kitchen?

-Yeah.

They were really creative.

Jack and I are going to go and get the first course out.

Wa-hey!

Fingers crossed Dad's going to love the food.

-This is our amazing ravioli.

-Tilly!

You cook comfort food. Fine dining is not your thing.

MUM GASPS Well, it is for you.

-Oh, darling, look.

-Dig in, everyone.

Thank you. It looks beautiful.

The pasta is so nice and thin.

-That is delicious.

-Tilly...

-Yes?

-It's beautiful.

-Yeah!

-He likes it!

-What a lovely surprise.

OK, Jack, let's go. Main course.

I'm quite emotional. I may cry.

Wow, Dad's getting all slushy.

Maybe that's what happens when you get old.

-This is our brilliant beef.

-Wow.

-Oh, my goodness.

-Oh, my goodness.

-Look at that.

-One, two, three...

-Ooh!

-Wow! That looks incredible.

That's beautiful.

I've been a bit nervous cooking food like this for you.

-Really, why?

-Well, because you're you.

Wow. It's got a nice seal on the outside and pink in the middle.

The perfect way to eat fillet. It's delicious. Seriously.

-Perfect.

-Yeah, I'm impressed.

-Time for a special dessert?

-Dessert time.

-Thank you very much.

Dessert's a dish eaten last and really remember,

so it's got to be super-wowwie. OK, guys.

-Oh, oh.

-Oh!

-Oh... Wow.

-One for you.

-Wow.

-Yes.

That's amazing.

And, look, mint-infused dry ice.

-It's like a Harry Potter dessert.

-Wow!

Oh, my! Wow.

-Tilly, this is delicious.

-Thank you. Five wows.

-Like, wow.

-Thank you so much.

I wonder what he'll think of his last surprise.

-Wow.

-Oh, look!

Oh, what a cutie! Like your haircut, Dad.

Did Mum cut it for you?

What bowl were you using at the time?

-The mixing bowl.

-The mixing bowl!

That look is so embarrassingly '80s.

-What was that?

-ALL:

-Aw!

-Wa-hey!

-Amazing.

-Happy birthday!

-Thank you very much.

-THEY CHEER

-Thank you.

Dad, if you're 50-years-old, that means you're 80,263-days-old.

Very funny, Tilly. Where is this going? It's bedtime.

Well, if you've eaten three meals a day,

-it means you've had 54,789 meals.

-Right.

-Is that why you're such a good chef?

-OK, Tilly.

Listen to me now. You're 15 years of age.

So, I've told you to go to sleep 5,479 times.

And, here's one more - get to sleep, please!

-ALL:

-Goodnight!

Goodnight.