Sleepover Me and My Monsters

# You're my might when I'm not feeling strong

# You put me right when I am going wrong

# You're my hands when my arms are tied

# You colour me in when I'm black and white

# You pick me up when I fall down

# You take my frown and you turn it around

# I couldn't wish for better friends to share my life with

# Don't be sad or lonely

# If you need someone to hold your hand

# Me and my monsters can

# Me and my monsters can. #

'With the possible exception of that ice cream with cookie in,

'friends are the most important thing you can have.

'Even if they're not all that smart.

'Good friends can always be relied upon

'which is good to know when you're setting off

'on a dangerous expedition.'

OK, according to Norman, our goal is to head up the stairs

into the kingdom of upstairs

and drink from the "enchanted white fountain".

Whatever that is.

THEY GIGGLE

OK, safety rope.

I couldn't get rope so I used this toilet roll.

Is it strong?

Oh, yeah and very absorbent.

OK, map.

Hm-hmm.

Um, that's a map of France.

And Switzerland.

OK, and for protection?

Introducing my incredible pant-apult.

Ta-da!

The stinky socks go in there. Now yank it back.

And fire!

-GLASS BREAKS

-You're going to pay for that.

Imagine if that priceless vase had been a bear.

Or a big sister.

Aren't those the legs from that chair?!

That's classified information.

-SCREAMING

-Possibly.

-Mum, can I please have a sleepover?

-OK.

Hear me out. It's been difficult making new friends,

moving schools and everything.

I said OK.

Tonight's the only night I can do it because Harriet's got this thing...

Angela!

I said yes. You can have a sleepover.

Really? Because I had this point I was going to make.

Would you still like to make it?

Yes, please.

I was going to say that

Fiona and Harriet are the most popular girls in the school

and they said that if they like me,

everyone will like me because I know them.

They said that?!

Yeah.

I think that is the most shallow thing I've ever heard.

I know. Isn't it brilliant?

-What?!

-Yes, it's shallow and everything else

but talk about a short cut.

If this pans out, I could go from having two friends,

to 2,000 overnight.

Being popular isn't everything, you know?

Yeah, well, I'm pretty sure being popular beats being unpopular.

There it is - the cave of the enchanted fountain.

It may be guarded. You guys wait here. I'll go first.

Ooh! Get off!

Ooh, gross!

Mmm, tastes like foot.

What are you guys doing up here?

For your information, we are TRYING to drink from the toilet.

-We are?

-You guys are disgusting.

ALL: Thank you.

Listen. I've got friends coming round for a sleepover.

I don't want to see you guys. I don't even want to hear you guys. Got it?!

What?

Do you want to smell us?

No!

That's fine with us.

Like we'd be interested in some stupid, girly sleepover.

We're adventurers.

We don't want face packs and have our nails painted

and watch weepie movies and eat cupcakes.

Right, guys?

Right, guys?

What's a face pack?

Sleepovers sound amazing!

< Hey!

I want my nails painted.

Right, the kids have eaten. There's lasagne for you.

Angela's having a sleepover.

I'm not sure about these new friends.

They sound like bad news so...

Honey, go out and have a good time. I think I can cope with the kids.

I'm like a father to them.

-Good luck.

-Enjoy yourself.

Hey-hey!

So, uh, just the fellas tonight? Where are the fur balls?

-They're having a sleepover.

-I thought that was Angela.

How do you think they got the idea?

She's been filling their heads with rubbish about make-up and cupcakes.

They're in the basement giving each other facials.

The last thing you want is monsters walking round

when Angela's friends get here.

It gives us the chance for father/son time.

I guess so.

-I think you might be ready.

-For what?

The time has come for you to learn...

..the secret.

A rare skill

passed down through the Carlson family from father to son.

Some say it is a superpower. Others simply call it the gift.

All I know is this - no-one puts together a TV cabinet

like your old man.

DVDs, chocolate, lipstick, blusher, eyeliner.

Eyeliner?

-Won't be a second!

-Hey!

-I already gave you an eyeliner!

-What can I say?

I've got a lot of eyes.

I thought we had a deal. I would tell you about sleepovers

and you would stay in your pit.

Without eyeliner! What is this? The Dark Ages?!

You listen to me...

PHONE RINGS

Hi, Fi. Yes, we're just getting ready for tonight.

If you could bring sleeping bags, that would be...

What do you mean, "can't come"? What party?

Oh...

Oh, I see.

Maybe we could all go there instead.

Oh, I see. Right.

Hello? Hello?

We got cut off.

Mm-hmm, so...uh...

No sleepover then?

Something's come up, so we're rescheduling.

Interesting.

Very interesting.

Great news! Angela has horrible friends.

THEY CHEER

Why's that good?

Because they've stood her up.

She's got a sleepover with no sleepover-erers.

Yes!

Why's that good?

We can take their place, fur-brain!

Imagine it. A sleepover with the queen of sleepovers herself.

Yes!

No, really. I think I get it this time.

Now, my young apprentice...

Your first test.

Instructions.

What do we do with these?

Um, follow them?

HE LAUGHS

A classic mistake.

Now, while they may be of use to amateurs,

such crude diagrams will stifle

the creative flourish of a seasoned crafstsman.

What?

I don't need instructions to know that this... It's the bottom.

I'm learning already.

MONSTERS SCREECH

Hey, what are you doing up here?

I told you to go downstairs.

That was back when you had friends.

-Hey...!

-We just didn't want you to be on your own.

I'm fine, really.

You need friends for a sleepover.

We're like your friends.

Except that you don't like us.

-It's not that I don't like you...

-Great.

So we can stay!

OK.

OK, so what happens now?

Well...

I hate to admit it, but spending time with you guys

has actually been...

Yeah, that's great, but we've kind of run out of chocolate, so...

I'll see what I can find.

Remember, don't blow your nose on the curtain,

the mattress is not a marshmallow

and if you swallow the remote again, I'm not fishing it out.

-DAD:

-Angela? Your friends are here! I sent them up!

Yeah, spotted that. Hi.

Hi. Who are you talking to?

-Just my brother.

-We wipes his nose on the curtain?

Only sometimes.

-I thought...

-The party got cancelled.

-So...

-We're back on?

-Yeah, of course we are.

Let's go into my...

Into my room over here.

So you're into trucks?

What? No.

Oh, that. Yeah.

Trucks generally, I don't like, but...that one, I love.

Oh, and that one, but that's it.

So, what kind of music do you like? I've got...

..mainly rubbish, but my brother borrows all good stuff.

Deadly Davis' Space Adventure?

Yeah, that's his. Don't worry, I'm not weird!

SHE LAUGHS MANICALLY

'Hey, eat your own fleas!'

Was that your brother?

Er...yeah.

Who's he talking to?

That would be my dad.

They eat each other's fleas?

Yes... No!

I don't know! I'll go check.

-OK.

-Er, nice hair, by the way.

Well, thank you!

-GIGGLING

-Stop it!

What did I just say?!

THEY SPEAK AT ONCE Shhh!

-What's with you?

-And where's our chocolate?

They run out!

They are downstairs. Yep, in the basement.

We are moving the sleepover down to the basement.

So grab all of your...

weird monster stuff and let's go, yeah?

Hi, Angela.

-Bathroom?

-Yep, it's straight down at the end there.

Yeah. OK.

Change of plan. We can't go out there because...

there's a mouse!

THEY ALL SHRIEK Shhh!

So we're going to stay here instead and move straight on

to the most exciting part of the sleepover, the sleep itself!

Ooh, yes, because I'm the best at sleeping!

How can you say that?! I'm like the sleep king.

HE SPEAK INDISTINCTLY

What? You're the worst at sleeping. You snore, you sleepwalk...

THEY SPEAK AT ONCE All right! OK!

No, no, no, everyone listen!

Everyone's as good as each other at sleeping at a sleepover

because of the...special sleepover song!

-Huh?

-We're monsters, not idiots.

-I'm both.

-No, really, there is. There's a special sleepover lullaby

that makes you...

I assure you there is no such thing as a song that sends you to sleep.

-There is, it goes...

-Doesn't exist!

It goes...

# Rock-a-bye monster... #

THEY SNORE

HE SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY

-So, what's with all the monsters?

-What?! Where?

Oh, that!

Yeah, I used to like monsters when I was younger.

Much younger. Not anymore, obviously.

THEY WHISPER

-What's that?

-Oh, that's nothing.

-What are you hiding?

-Nothing.

-Come on...show us.

We promise we won't laugh.

THEY SIGH

What IS that?

Oh, that?

Oh, that's just my jar of bogeys.

I'm pretty sure the instructions said you didn't need glue.

But if we followed the instructions, this'd fall apart in six months.

A couple of dabs of Super Stick and this thing will outlast us.

Don't look so worried, your dad's a certified DIY expert.

This again. Hmm!

I'll have stilettos in size 20 with ketchup and a side salad.

-Must have dropped off for a second.

-I just had the best dream -

we were in a shoe restaurant. You had slipper soup

with sport shoe croutons!

Hang on...

-where's Norman?

-Wh... Oh!

Oh, he must be around here somewhere. I...

Norman?

-Norman?

-Maybe he's somewhere a little further away.

Let me try.

NORMAN!

-That's not good.

-Just go! Go, go, go, go, go...!

AHHHHHHH!

SCREAMING

-What is going on in here?

-What is going on in here?!

-That's what she said!

-It's a long story.

-The monsters are in here while me and the girls are in your room.

-Girls?

-The girls from the sleepover.

-BOTH: There's another sleepover?!

Wait! Where's Norman?

He's gone missing!

HE YELPS

He was in my room earlier and the girls nearly spotted him, too.

Then you need to get back over there!

-What if he comes back?!

-Oh, fine! Make sure you keep these two quiet.

HE BURPS

If you're not eating that, can I have it?

'And I thought she was weird at school!

'I mean, monster pyjamas! I mean, come on.'

-'And what about her hair?

-Oh, yeah!

-And all the shouting?

-'Her whole family's weird, if you know what I mean.

-Big house, though.

Might be worth keeping her on side, you know, for parties.

Yeah, like anyone would come to a party at Angela's!

DOOR OPENS

Oh, hi, Angela!

Um...we weren't talking about you, by the way.

We were talking about...

another Angela.

Oh, were you now?

This is unbelievable!

Those girls treated her like dirt, and not the good kind.

I'm going to go over there and give them a piece of my mind.

-Hmm.

-No, wait!

Look at this!

Oh, come on, Eddie! You're not going to stop me from going over there

with some silly little distraction... Oo-oo-h!

Pretty colours!

That's right. And if you keep very quiet,

then you can paint the pretty colours on each other's faces.

But our faces are already pretty colours!

-Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

-HE CHUCKLES

'Now keep still or you'll smudge.'

What are you...? Hi, there. Why?

I'm keeping them quiet!

You're not doing a great job. We have to go downstairs.

Wait...where's the purple one?

And quite frankly, I don't care what you think about me,

or about this room, or anything that's happening this evening.

And for your information, there is nothing weird about my family.

Oh, hi, girls! Don't mind me.

-Just, er, looking for my dog.

-Your dog?

Yeah, you know...

-the big purple one?

-Oh, Norman?

-You have a big purple dog called Norman?

-Yeah, yeah.

-Somewhere.

-Well, he was in here earlier, but I think he left.

Ah, right, OK.

I'll just go and look for him. If you see him,

anywhere, you'll let me know where?

Linen basket!

-I'm going to do some washing.

-I'm just going to help him. I'll be back.

I'm sorry, but sleepovers with monsters in the house

just aren't a good idea.

Might be best to see if your friends don't mind going home.

Well, as it happens, I was just about to suggest that.

Really? Well, um...

that's great. Me and Eddie will look after the furballs.

-Get all your washing done?

-Cos we think you forgot something.

Ha-ha, wow, that's hilarious(!) Anyway, I think you should leave.

Excuse me?

It's just you're a bit...

not weird. What's the word?

Boring!

Fine! Well, my dad has a sports car.

He'll be here in five minutes.

Great! See if he can make it three.

Got a plan. You keep that lot there and I'll take that lot downstairs.

OK, got it.

What happened?! I thought your lot were here and mine were downstairs?

You take those monsters downstairs and I keep these upstairs!

No, wait, no! Other way round.

I'm taking over! The other guy wasn't working out. Anyway...!

New plan. We both take the girls out the front door now

-and Eddie can entertain the monsters.

-Got it.

And, son, let them put on as much make-up as they want on you!

OK, when you say that out loud, it does sound kind of weird.

OK, let's go!

-Well, it really is good to meet you, bye!

-My dad's not here yet.

-Yeah, he is. Listen.

-SIREN WAILS

-That's him now.

-That's an ambulance.

-You sure?

-Yes.

-And my dad doesn't drive one.

-That's a shame - he'd be here by now!

There, that's the last of the make-up.

-Ooh, what's that noise?

-It's nothing!

-Sounds like nothing.

-Sounds like fun! Let's go see.

No, wait!

-Yeah, let's wait outside.

-Why? Why can't we just wait inside?

-What is going on here?

-Nothing!

-Everything's normal.

-Oh, come off it.

We're not idiots. I don't know what it is, but there's something

-you're trying to hide.

-Yeah, and we're not leaving until we find out

-what it is.

-Dad!

It's no good. I've tried everything,

but the fact is, I've run out of make-up!

-See ya.

-Bye.

And that is what you call a close shave!

THEY SCREAM

-What is it with you guys?

-They were trying to be nice,

but it just took me a while to see who the real monsters were.

Sorry, guys.

Nah, you didn't miss much.

-HE STAMMERS

-"You didn't miss much?!"

That's the most stressful sleepover I've ever seen!

Really? Feeling stressed, eh?

LAUGHTER

Gorgeous!

-Hi!

-Hi, Mum.

Um... Where are the girls?

It was a bit of a change of plan.

I see. And where's your dad?

Looks like there was a major change of plan!

Um...

just sort of got swept up in this.

-Want your nails done?

-I wouldn't say no!

'All right, I suppose sleepovers aren't that awful

'as long as you share them with the right friends.

'And despite their faults, friends like these monsters

'are pretty hard to beat.

'I mean, they even managed to find Dad's softer side!'

Oh! Oh, I just went a bit over the side.

It's all right, I'll just...

I'll scrape it off with this when I'm done.

'Kind of!'

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd