Off the Rails Millie Inbetween

Jessie stayed over last night, again!

We had a midnight feast.

It reminded me of primary school,

not wanting to be the first one to fall asleep because your mates would

draw on your face.

Wait, Jessie, you didn't draw on my...

Of course not! As if I would.

-PHONE RINGS

-Mum, again, would you stop calling!

-What if it's important?

-I don't think so.

Her mum's been calling since early - when not just answer?

MESSAGE ALERT

We're doing a dance routine in the school variety show,

Hope Street's Hopefuls.

We are so going to win.

I haven't been in a double act since I was the back end of the camel

with Cindy Phelps in the school nativity play.

You did draw on my face!

Our costumes will be fab.

Mum's amazing at making huge fruit and veg.

Oh, thank you!

Well, it is what I do, stuff like that.

Those are awesome!

Hey, Mills, we could be artichoke hearts!

Come on, let's practice!

Five, six, seven, eight.

Footwork's a bit dodgy.

Don't you have a ball to chase?

Resting the golden legs.

Tell you what...

-..I could coach you.

-No, thanks.

This is a dance routine, not a grunty football game.

-So you don't want to win, then?

-We do.

And hear the roar of the fans as you lift the cup, I get it,

-it's fine.

-No, wait!

Well, we could give him a go.

Who knows? Might help.

Back after lunch for our training session with Sport-acus, then?

Now to design my stage make-up.

-That's mine.

-Good sleepover?

-Yeah.

-Did you fall asleep first?

Oh, no, no, no, no!

-Oh!

-Oh, no!

-Whoa, Mum!

-I've pushed it too hard, I've broken Lily!

-Who's Lily?

-My faithful sewing machine.

Oh, shame.

Oh!

Maybe don't mention this to Millie just yet, OK?

Don't mention Lily to Millie? Check.

I'll get someone out to fix it.

I have the gold star service package.

Surprised they're not here already.

DOORBELL RINGS

-Hi.

-Hi. Forget something?

No, my parents are out and I left my keys at home.

-Can I just stay here?

-Mm...

Yeah, sure.

PHONE RINGS

Let's go work on our routine?

PHONE CONTINUES TO RING

She didn't forget her keys. I wonder what's going on.

She must be in big trouble.

-OK, what have you done?

-It's nothing.

Why not answer your phone, then?

Hey, can I sleepover again?

But you've not been home yet?

And Lauren's back.

My parents are having a party. It'll be mad noisy.

You said they were out.

You said you left these behind.

Come on, talk to me.

-Swear you won't tell anyone?

-Of course not.

It's just I'm worried my parents are going to give me the talk.

What? Like how you shouldn't skateboard in a shopping centre?

You know, your dad and I have something to tell you.

Like your parents did when they split up.

Right. Wow.

Did you not see it coming?

Maybe a bit, but they can't give me the talk if I'm not there, eh?

Jessie, you can't mute your phone and sleepover forever.

-Why do you think that they...

-It's just...they've been,

like, well, moody.

That's grown-ups for you.

It's probably just a phase.

Yeah, yeah, I hope you're right.

Don't want to end up like you, do I?

Yeah, as I said earlier, I do have the gold star service package.

Fine. On another job.

Should've gone for the platinum star package.

Declan could fix your sewing machine.

He's doing a mechanics apprenticeship.

Yeah, I'd be happy to take a look, Mrs Taylor.

Oh, that's very sweet of you but I don't think...

Oh, come on, he's great at complicated things,

it's just the simple stuff that he can't do.

Oh, I do really need to get on with these costumes.

Hey! What have you got to lose?

Come on, stretch, enjoy the pain.

-Ow!

-OK, that's enough warming up.

Let's see what you've got.

POP MUSIC PLAYS

WHISTLE BLOWS

Wait, wait, wait, wait. You don't just start on the pitch, do you?

You have to come out of the tunnel.

-Who's the captain?

-I am.

-I am.

OK. Jessie, you lead the people out.

Look proud, like you're champions.

What's the problem now?

You! Keep your head up, like Jessie's.

He's got a point, you do kind of stare at your feet.

Exactly, smile like you mean it.

Your eyes aren't smiling.

How can my eyes smile?

Jessie's can.

I can't believe he made me do it all on my own.

After the tenth time, you were much better.

-See you tomorrow?

-I hope everything's OK with your parents.

I'm just being paranoid, they probably had indigestion.

I hope she's right.

But, if not, I have totally got this.

I made a journal of my break-up reactions to parents, or my BURP,

for short. I went through this so Jessie doesn't have to.

-Thank you.

-My sister's the show MC.

Master of ceremonies.

Next!

-Name?

-I'm your brother.

-I have to treat everyone the same.

-It's Jake.

-And what's your act, Jake?

-I'm going to be plate spinning.

-Do you know how to do that?

-No, but how hard can it be?

Sorry, no way. I can't have my brother embarrassing me.

Well, you have to treat everyone the same. Anyway, I'm doing it.

Over my dead body. Next!

BELL RINGS

Hey! I've been looking for you all day. How'd it go last night?

It's fine. All good, you?

They gave you the talk, didn't they?

Shh, quiet! OK, maybe.

-Yeah.

-Oh, Jessie.

If you hadn't made me go home, it would have all been fine.

Look, I can save you a lot of trouble,

cos it happened to me and I wrote it all down.

This is my break-up reaction to parents.

Or my BURP.

All right, my diary.

Page one - "Dad's moving out for a bit.

"They say they need some space."

Same! But they just got an extension.

No, not that kind of space.

And these are the stages that I went through.

And they can be a bit painful,

so it would be best if you can try and skip them. Stage one - denial.

Hold it, stop! This will all blow over,

it's nothing and I don't want you making it into a big deal.

She's denying that she's in denial.

It can be easy to want to hide your head in the sand.

We did! And, hey, a million ostriches can't be wrong.

Everything is totally fine with them, all right?

OK, so Dad slept on the sofa because?

He had an early start.

And Mum was weepy because?

She watched Titanic again.

OK, so everything's fine?

Yeah! Totally!

We pretended like nothing was happening,

which is a great plan unless something is happening.

I can help but Jessie just doesn't want to hear it.

How's it going, Declan?

Now, it might look like it'll never go back together in a million years,

but, don't worry, I've got this.

-Where does this go?

-Declan,

we're running out of time. I mean, the show's Friday,

the costumes still to be made.

Mum! Don't pressure him.

What do you think you're doing?

Practising my plates spinning.

Not with your mum's best china, you're not.

Come with me.

It's not fair.

I want to do my act in the school show, but Fran won't let me.

I can't think why.

-You as well?

-Oh, look, I'll have a word with her, yeah?

But you, keep practising.

Oh, Mike, can you just talk to Mum,

I don't want her hurting Declan's feelings.

-Well, I'm sure she wouldn't.

-He's very sensitive.

Also, he really needs the practice, because the last couple of things

he's worked on have slightly blown up.

-Blown up?

-Can you just talk to her?

Please?

Here's a good sample of mica, note the shiny bits.

-And they are?

-Glitter?

-Crystals.

But actually they use mica in lipstick to make it shiny.

Hey, Millie, this is Clifford. He's top in my science class.

He's helping me with my homework.

Hi. Are you interested in rocks?

About as much as Jessie is.

Give me a second?

I've figured out this thing with my parents.

-I think it might be all my fault.

-What? No way.

We fell into that exact same trap.

It's in my BURP somewhere.

No, I mucked about too much. Now I'm going to knuckle down and work.

There! "They had another fight because I had the TV on too loud,"

-but that was the other way around.

-And wait until they see this.

An 80 in my latest maths test!

Wow!

Did you change that from 30?

That's not important.

Jessie, this is stage two -

blaming yourself and trying to fix it, but it's not about you.

Clifford, what's this?

You have a good eye. That's schist... Now...

"Shouted at Mum again. Why am I so horrible?"

Jessie's bringing all this back.

See, I wanted it to be our fault,

because that meant we could do something about it.

Why can't you do the loo?

Scrub, you worm! We're too messy.

And if we clean up, Mum and Dad won't have anything to fight about.

-And then they maybe won't split up.

-OK.

THEY SQUEAL

Jessie, seriously. I can save you a lot of time, this doesn't work.

Is that right? And who died and made you the big expert?

-I can come back later, if you...

-No, stay where you are.

-It's just...I've been through this so I...

-So what?

Everyone's different and you can't knock me for trying.

And, who knows? Maybe if you'd tried a bit harder,

your parents would still be together.

Come on, Clifford, let's go.

Come round tomorrow after school? Leo wants to rehearse!

That's it, I'm calling the shop.

A gold star has to count for something.

The thing is, Sharon, Declan hasn't got much confidence

as it is, a knock like this could set him back a long way.

I'm sorry, but Millie comes before Declan.

OK, I'm sure Lauren will forgive you eventually.

Do you think I can talk Mum and Mike into getting me a car?

You can't drive, though.

No, not without a car. It's like, what came first -

the chicken or the hen?

Lauren.

Do you think you can get grown-ups to change their minds?

Of course. Well, I can.

So, do you think if we tried harder, then we could've got Mum and Dad

to change their minds? About splitting up?

What? Hello!

Who's put that idea into your head?

It's just something Jessie said.

-Do you?

-Are you serious?

Do you remember cleaning that bathroom? It was, like, spotless.

But there was water pouring down the kitchen ceiling.

Yeah, bet that really made them want to stay together.

Wow, Jessie's been really messing with your head.

It's just...stuff I thought I knew, now I'm not so sure. I...

Look, it's like that old king guy who ordered his knights to hold back

the tide. Um...

-King Kong.

-I'm pretty sure that was King Canute.

King Canoe? No, that is definitely not right.

Anyway, my point is,

we were like those knights, trying to whip back the sea.

It never works.

You just end up with wet feet.

Which we literally did.

And I did my homework on time, for an entire month.

What a waste.

So, well, it wasn't our fault, then.

-Was it?

-No.

Cos it wasn't about us.

It was about them.

Right! What kind of car were you thinking?

One that matches my nails.

DOORBELL RINGS

Oh, hi.

So, how's being a massive nerd going?

Were your parents impressed with your maths result?

Yeah, Dad was over the moon.

Didn't stop him from packing, though.

So now I officially can't be bothered.

-Where'd you get that?

-He gave it to me.

It's a guilt present.

He says it would be best if he doesn't come to the show.

Wait!

Dad gave us wheelie trainers when we went to visit his poky new flat.

Lauren chucked them in the bin, but I pulled them out.

Ladies! How's Jessie, my star playmaker?

Ready to work?

Let's go. From the middle section, OK?

Remember what I said, give me 110%.

-Technically, that's impossible.

-Just do it!

POP MUSIC PLAYS

Good, nice. Yep. Come on, Jessie. Nice.

Bend and big jump! Good. Come on, Jessie.

OK, hold it, hold it.

Team talk. Good, Mimi.

You're putting the ball in all the right areas.

Jessie, you're a different player.

Talk about phoning it in, you're calling long distance. What's up?

-Gone off the song.

-Well, we can't change it now.

Hear me out. What about this?

SAD SONG PLAYS

What do you think?

You should let your little brother do his act.

But he'll only embarrass himself... and me.

I've seen him and he's definitely improving.

Fine, if it goes wrong, it's on you.

Thank you, darling.

She's right, I'm useless.

Shh, enough of that. I've got something for you.

A proper plate spinning kit.

Everything feels so hopeless.

Like it's game over.

You don't know that. And even if your parents split up,

you'll still be OK.

-No, I won't.

-Yes, you will.

Listen.

"I just want to crawl under my duvet and never come out.

"Life's a joke that isn't funny."

-Oh! That makes me feel a lot better.

-But look at me now.

-Want to keep this thing?

-This is just a stage that you're in.

And this was me, I was so miserable.

-I even went for long walks in the rain.

-Would you put that book away?

There's no diagram of disaster, OK?

Everyone's different and we all deal with it in our own way.

I'm going for a walk. See you.

She's in a despair dip, just like we were.

SAD MUSIC PLAYS

That's the thousandth time.

Mum said she'd scream if you play it again.

MUM SCREAMS

But I'm worried about what's to come next.

Rage. And, with Jessie, I have a feeling rage could be very ragey,

but what can I do?

I can't just stand by while she goes off the rails.

DOORBELL RINGS

I got a repairman to come.

-What about Declan?

-Well, he's had his chance, Mike, I'm out of time.

-Mrs Turner?

-Yes, Dez, come in.

-It's through here.

-Oh, thanks.

Oh, all done!

Sorry it took so long.

And thanks for believing in me, Sharon.

Who's this?

This, this is, um, this is Des.

Des is here to read the meter.

-Come on, mate, this way.

-Sorry, I don't understand.

-Look, Lauren, I did it.

-I always knew that you would,

you've got intelligent fingers.

Oh, Declan, I could kiss you! I mean, I won't, obviously.

But I will.

Right, out you get, you two. I've got work to do.

Hurry up, we're running of time.

-Jessie?

-Back here, just getting some more paint and stuff.

OK. Cool.

So, how are you feeling now about your parents?

Excited about the show.

Right, cos you might start feeling a teensy bit angry around about now.

We did, when our parents were like this.

Lauren anger-ate a whole jar of lemon curd.

Well, I guess that proves you're not the expert, cos I'm fine.

Really.

Oh, right.

Well, I brought your costume.

Great, I'll try it on when I'm not all painty.

I guess I was wrong about the angry thing.

Jessie seems pretty calm, considering.

Maybe she was right -

we all feel bad but we deal with it in different ways.

PHONE RINGS

MESSAGE ALERT

SHE SIGHS

Oh!

-You OK?

-What?!

SHE SHOUTS

-What are you doing?!

-Watch out!

-Jessie!

-Get out of my way!

-Jessie? What's going on?

Jessie's gone on a total rampage. She's made a huge mess in the hall.

Looks like Jessie hasn't skipped rage after all.

-I've got to find her.

-Well, hurry!

-We got a show to do.

-Can't you just delay it?

No! Hope Street Hopefuls must go on.

Please take your seats for tonight's show.

LIVELY MUSIC PLAYS

GASPS AND APPLAUSE

I know, edgy.

Welcome to Hope Street Hopefuls. Anything could happen,

especially when Jake tries out his plate spinning a bit later.

Look out down the front row.

But, first, please welcome Max and his amazing magic tricks!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

So this is where you've ended up. Come on, we've got to get ready.

-I'm not going on.

-What?

You have to do it yourself. I'll probably get chucked out of school,

-anyway.

-Look, I get it, all right?

You're angry. And so was I.

I was so mad at Dad.

I even buried his socks in the garden.

Ooh, what a rebel.

-I told you, we're totally different.

-No, we're not.

You think that you're the first person this has happened to?

Look, I know what I'm doing, OK?

You do? So trashing the school is all part of your clever plan, is it?

At least my parents will have to pay attention to how I feel!

Why should they?!

Mine didn't, cos it's not about you.

-Leave me alone.

-You're not getting off that easy.

-You're really bugging me.

-Look, it's OK to feel angry, we all did.

Please welcome Heather, who'll be playing her violin blindfolded.

So, what is it that set you off, anyway?

Another stupid text from my dad.

Probably still feels bad, wants me to forgive him.

-Right, and did you read it?

-What's the point?

He says he'll try and make it.

THEY GASP

APPLAUSE

Way to go, Jason!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Jake the plate, everyone. He's my little brother.

Mum's here.

There's Dad!

I can't do this. I'm too nervous.

-Do it for the team.

-Leo, how did you get back here?

Backstage pass.

Remember, no matter how nervous you are, look proud.

Like a champion.

Last but not least, please welcome, The Heartbeats.

POP MUSIC PLAYS

THEY GASP

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

The welcoming committee, Mr Yeats.

It's all right, I've got this.

Go and see your mum and dad.

-Mr Yeats, I can explain.

-What's going on?

-Thanks for coming!

-Brilliant!

-You were great!

I was so nervous.

-How were they?

-All right.

Still don't have a clue what they're doing.

Either way, like I said, it's not the end of the world.

-And I'll be there with you. OK?

-Yeah, thanks.

Jessie! You've had quite a day.

-Sorry.

-Great performance, but I want to see you first thing tomorrow.

-Can I come?

-Yes, Millie, good idea.

-See you tomorrow?

-Mm.

-Thanks.

So, we didn't win the prize,

but getting Jessie on the stage was the real win.

I realised I was dumb,

I can't save her from going through it all,

but I can be there with her.

Still, if we have another sleepover,

I'm totally going to draw on her face.

-Millie!

-Millie!

-You were so good!

-You were amazing!