Episode 9 Richard Hammond's Blast Lab

Right, I'm turning the machine up.

Turning it up. Turning it up a bit more now. You'll be fine.

Turning it up. Ooh. Arh. Yeah.

Sorry. OK. Just experimenting with a lab rat, there.

He'll be fine. Cross, but fine.

Hello. I'm Richard Hammond. Welcome to my Blast Lab!

APPLAUSE

This is the science show for people who think science is boring.

In a moment, we'll meet two teams of budding young scientists

who'll compete in cutting-edge scientific experiments.

The winning team will be win prizes. So will the losing team,

but unfortunately, they have to blow theirs up in an exploding bidet.

Let's see what's in store today...

Now, obviously, with this being a super secret underground lab,

I only use the very best to guard it.

A crack SAS team.

Funny thing though, they turned up to work this morning

and they were all wearing the same thing - green camouflage.

Embarrassing, so they've gone to get changed,

but I have a replacement - a one-woman fighting machine.

A woman who can fight a man with one finger in slippers and a hairnet.

Her, not the man, obviously. She is my Ninja Nan!

APPLAUSE

Ninja Nan.

Thanks for standing in.

I know she may look fragile, but she is in fact a fully trained ninja.

Yeah. There you go. Nan, take your place in security.

Oh, her batteries have gone again. Nan! Thank you.

If you'd like to take your place in security and look after things.

There she goes. Look at her move.

Look at the speed. Ninja Nan, are you settled in yet?

Oh, there she goes, look.

Yes. With her little ninja shopping trolley behind her.

Getting settled in. Oh, what's she after? It'll be her food for later.

Oh, yes, that's a rock cake, but being a ninja, it's real rock.

Only Ninja Nan can cope with that.

Right. Let's meet the people who are trying to get into my lab today.

Now, let's not get all giddy. They say they're the Yellow Team.

They've got the right lab coats on, but they could be anybody.

We have to be careful of security. This lab is top secret.

-Identify yourselves by name, please.

-Megan.

-Shekeera.

-Alex.

Megan, Shekeera, Alex. Yes. That checks out with what I've got.

What hidden talent will you demonstrate to prove who you are?

This is Alex who's going to do baton twirling, it says here.

It's a baton and it's twirling. What do we reckon?

Yeah? All right. OK. That's it. You are the Yellow Team.

Come through. You're cleared through security.

APPLAUSE

That confirms then that you are our Yellow Team.

-Welcome. Where have you come from?

-Norwich, and we're Team Sam.

That's your own name. You didn't need that. Yellow Team, welcome.

We're gonna meet the people who claim to be your opponents.

APPLAUSE

You've got the right lab coats. You say you're the Red Team.

-Prove it. Identify yourselves by name, please.

-Stan.

-Louis.

-Dan!

Wow. Stan, Louis and Dan. That's right. Hidden talent...

It's Louis. What will you do to prove... What are you doing?

HE MOUTHS SILENTLY

-What are you doing? Speak up.

-Miming.

-Can't be a mime, you spoke.

It does say miming here and that is miming. Come through security.

You're clear past Ninja Nan.

Are we not too well today, Dan? Have you brought germs into my Blast Lab?

If you get any in that tank behind you,

overnight they mutate and they come out this big, with pincers.

Don't cough near there. Red Team. Welcome. Where have you come from?

Cornwall. And we're the Randomers.

Good name but useless. The Red Team will do for today.

Both teams, get ready for round one.

Go over there and get settled in.

I love cars and science, and here's something that's a bit of both.

He's a smooth ride with a sharp mind. My best friend, Oliver.

Oliver is fitted with the very latest hi-tech facts nav.

I should know because I fitted it.

As a result, it doesn't always work.

Some of its facts are wrong, some are right.

I want my teams to tell me which is which first.

Oliver will confirm it. If it's true, he'll do this...

SIREN BLARES AND HORN BEEPS

And he'll let us know if it's false by doing this...

FOGHORN BLARES

Couldn't be simpler rules. Are we happy?

This is your first chance to earn points. Ready for a science fact?

Red Team, your first chance to earn a point.

I'm trying to make you nervous. Is it working? No. You look relaxed.

-I'm a bit nervous.

-You are?

-No. 'Course not.

-OK. Here's your fact...

Lightning strikes somewhere on Earth ten times per minute.

Is that true or false? Have a chat.

You never know what one of you might know. I'll ask the audience.

Lightning strikes somewhere ten times a minute. True or false?

What do we think?

AUDIENCE SHOUT

Some true. Some false. Bit of a mix there.

Bit of a mix over here as well.

OK. Reds, have we come to a conclusion?

If you can all agree on an answer.

-False.

-Louis, are you going to be spokesperson?

-False.

-False.

Oliver, is it true or false?

FOGHORN BLARES

It's false. Well done. That's a point for you.

CHEERING

It actually strikes - I've got the figures here -

6,000 times per minute, which is 100 times a second, which equates to

8,640,000 times a day.

Right. Yellow Team, here is your science fact.

Tell me whether this is true or false.

Have a think about it before you give your answer.

The average pencil lead can draw a line

over 200 metres long before it runs out.

Have a talk. Have a think. Have a think. Don't let me rush you.

-Audience, true or false?

-AUDIENCE SHOUTS

Mostly true there, I think,

but don't go too much by what the audience think.

-What do you think?

-False.

-False. Oliver, is it true or false?

FOGHORN BLARES

-It's false.

-CHEERING

There you go.

The longest pencil in the world was created by Faber-Castell in 2002.

It was 19.75 metres long.

80 centimetres in dia... You're not interested in this, are you?

The average pencil lead could draw a line about 35 miles long.

What do you think about that? So that's how false that was.

Or 45,000 words, if you wanted to wear one out.

-Shall I just ask you the questions?

-Yeah.

-OK.

Here is your third question. This works differently -

it isn't true or false. This is one I need you to answer.

Write it on the boards in front of you.

How many moons does the planet Uranus have?

How many moons does Uranus have? Think while I talk to the audience.

Anybody know the answer to that, or would want to hazard a guess?

I can come and ask you by using my new invention, boot-mike.

-Talk into it. It's a microphone.

-Nine.

-Nine.

-17.

17. Just talk to the boot.

Any astronomers? Anybody actually look at things through telescopes?

-Do you?

-Yeah. 20.

-20. OK. We're getting a real ballpark figure here. Yes.

-Three.

Three. That's quite a range established by a young man here.

OK. Audience, I'll take some from here, finally. Yeah.

-72.

-Woah! Now we've got three to 72.

-This is more like it.

-12?

-OK.

We've got three to 72 and just about all the numbers in-between.

All facts gathered in with the use of my handy boot-mike,

which is not impressing anybody in the Blast Lab today.

You've both written down answers.

Let's have a look at what you've got. Turn your boards round, please.

For the Red Team...

For the yellow team... That's quite spooky.

You conducting your own experiment and doing ESP in my Blast Lab?

That's quite a coincidence. Right. Here's the real answer. It is...

27...that we know of. Scientists think there may be more.

As you've both got the same answer,

you're both furthest and closest to the real answer,

but I'm feeling generous.

I'll give both teams a point.

CHEERING

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

That is all to come, but right now, it's time for Mini Science,

where our teams get to use household objects

to conduct extraordinary science experiments.

Now, my old school science teacher

accidentally ended up as a ten-year-old

during an experiment with time travel. Yes.

She's teaching at the local school,

but she is the only teacher ever to get a detention

after one of her own colleagues mistook her for one of her class.

So she's not in a very good mood with me. And it is Mini Miss.

CHEERING

-Hello, Miss.

-Hello, Richard.

Hello. What are we doing today?

-We're going to be looking at air particles.

-Brilliant.

But Miss, air particles are tiny.

There's billions of them, and we can't...

I can't see that one. I can't...

I can't see them anywhere.

-How can we look at them?

-Cos we're not looking at the particles.

We look at the effect it has on everything else.

Well, we're going to be looking at them in a game called Ping Pong Pass.

The aim of the game is to get the most amount of balls

from these buckets to the cylinders

using the flow of air from the hairdryers.

Each team member stands in a zone,

and the ball should be passed from one to the other,

using the hairdryers.

OK. So they can't use their hands for this, then?

-No. Well, they have to hold the hairdryers.

-Yes, Miss.

So they have to hold the hairdryer, but they can't touch the ball.

That must move in the flow from one to another.

All right, teams, so you know what you've got to do. Sounds tricky.

Let's find out if it is.

You've got some time to do this, and that some time starts...

..just then.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

AUDIENCE SHOUT

It is air particles making this possible.

I can demonstrate with my hairdryer here.

Now, if I set it going,

the ball isn't balancing...

on top of the column of air.

It's actually held within it,

and I can demonstrate

by putting smoke through it.

If you put the smoke in,

you can see the fast-moving stream of smoke

in the middle.

All the particles there

are getting spaced out further apart.

The air around the outside

that you can see in the smoke there,

is where these air particles

are rushing to replace them,

and they're holding the ball in place.

And this effect is why you can tilt it. Look!

It's not balancing,

it's being held in place by air pressure,

by particles moving in.

Fire fighters use air particles, if you like -

when there's a fire in the room, they use a fan

to push a load more air into the room

and all those particles

take up all the space

and they push the smoke out of the room.

Clever things, air particles. Let's see how they're doing.

Stan dunking one for the Reds.

Shekeera doing the same for the Yellows.

Oh, a dropped ball for the Reds.

Yellows going for a changeover.

Oh, no, not this time.

Stan, again scoring for the Reds.

And Shekeera...

likewise for the Yellows.

It is anybody's game at this point.

Oh, and Stan's missed one for the Reds.

OK. Teams, that is it. Time is up. Time is up.

Well, let's find out who's won.

Stan, did you get it in as he said, "One"?

That was the closest I've ever seen at the end of the game.

Five, four, three, two, one, it went in, so we'll allow that.

Right. Let's see which team has won.

Lab rats, count them up, please. Bear with us, audience.

They're operating at the absolute limit

of their capabilities right now, counting stuff.

OK. Lab rat, over here.

How many for the Reds? Six. Six for the Reds.

Let's see how the Yellows have done.

Lab rat, how many for the Yellows? Three.

The Reds have won. Well done!

That makes the score three-two to the Reds. Well done.

Another point for the Red Team. So, we've just seen fast moving air

holding something when the air's moving this way holds it there.

I wonder, if the air was faster and the object was larger,

could you use it to support an object this way?

I'm talking about flying.

Driving a go-kart can be a lot of fun.

Cruising around the track with the wind in your hair

and not a care in the world.

But imagine if you could fly above the track.

We've called in this paragliding expert,

or as he likes to be known, a wind commander.

Hello. I'm a wind commander.

He's brought his paraglider

to help turn our petrol-powered go-kart

into a magnificent wind-powered flying machine.

The paraglider works because as it's pulled along,

air rushes over and under its curved shape.

The theory goes that air flowing over the curve

becomes more spread out than air flowing under it.

The air that's less spread out pushes against the paraglider

and should lift it and the go-kart up.

However, if the air is not flowing fast enough,

this push won't be strong enough to lift the paraglider

and our go-kart will be as airborne as...an elephant.

He's going to attach his paraglider on to the go-kart

and attempt to use the thrust from the engine

combined with the upwards force of the paraglider

to make the go-kart fly through the air.

If he can pull this off, it'll be a world first.

Good luck, wind commander.

Hold the experiment because I think there's an extra point in this.

Score right now is three-two, but there's an extra point for the team

that can tell me correctly, will the go-kart fly or not?

What do we think? Have a chat amongst yourselves, both teams.

Going to ask you both for an answer.

Will it fly or not? Audience, any ideas? Will it fly or not?

Hang on. I tell you what, I'll get my microphone boot.

What do you reckon?

Depends what the CC of the engine is.

-So it depends on power.

-It depends on power and it depends on weight.

If it's a lot of power and not much weight it will give you what?

-It will give you speed.

-Yeah.

-And that might make a difference.

-Yeah.

It depends if the bottom's covered or if there's holes in the bottom.

-Of the go-kart?

-Yes.

-The aerodynamics could affect it.

-Yeah.

-The wind, as well. If there's like a wind against...

That's a point. Cos if we're trying to get fast-moving air

by driving that way, but the air's moving that way with us,

it'll cancel it out.

But if the air's moving that way, it's like going faster.

This is the clever corner. I've had enough of talking to you.

Right. That's good theories though, guys, really good theories.

Any other theories? Will it work or will it not?

I don't think it will because I don't think the up-thrust

will be strong enough to pull the go-kart and a person up because

gravity will prob...probably be...

stronger than the up-thrust.

So, the mass, the weight, of the go-kart and the rider,

they won't go enough lift... from that wind.

-OK. So you're thinking not.

-No.

-OK.

So the audience are pretty unanimous on this one.

Right. Teams, have you come up with your answers?

-So, Reds, your answer, what do you think?

-Yes.

-You think it's going to work.

-Yeah.

-OK. Yellows?

-Yeah.

-You think it's going to work, as well.

OK. Only one way to find out and settle this one.

Carry on with the experiment.

Here he goes. Let's see if he can make this baby fly.

The front wheels are off the ground but now they're back down again.

He nearly did it that time, but he's driven into the grass. Again.

Well, he's certainly not giving up easily, is he?

He seems to think he's flying, but I'm sure we can all agree he's not.

-It was four wheels, wasn't it?

-No.

So there we go. Afraid no points for either team. It didn't work.

Should have known. Lab rats involved.

That's cough's not getting better, Dan.

Must be a lab rat can mend that for you. Right.

Both teams, you now have to go off

and get ready for Messy Messy Mess Test.

Believe me, you need your protective outfits.

So if you'd like to go away and get ready for that.

I just think it might be worth our while, audience,

while they're getting ready, finding out why it didn't work.

A go-kart is powered by its turning wheels,

rather than having a huge powerful fan at the back like a jet engine.

So in order to maintain its thrust,

its wheels need to stay on the track.

When it lifts off the ground, that thrust is lost and the rush of air

needed to make the paraglider work disappears.

Hang on, it looks like... yes, it looks like he's done it.

Oh, hold on a minute. No. He's just being carried off the track.

That was rubbish. Give us back that badge.

So, there you go. Right. It's time for us all

to move on to the Messy Messy Mess Test...

..which today is in the septic tank.

This is full of just mind-bogglingly awful stuff.

It's where all the waste from my experiments ends up.

So...comfortable in there? Don't worry, though.

One thing I can promise you, there's no creepy crawlies in there.

All the rats ate them. So, you'll be absolutely fine.

As well as rats in there, there are these. Discs.

Some are like this one. Duds.

But the ones you're after are these, as modelled by my lab rats.

They feature your team's colour and the names of prizes.

Now, there'll be things like multimedia MP3 player,

a wind-powered helicopter or a Blood, Bones And Body kit.

Our teams have to get as many of these discs from the septic tank

full of just the worst stuff you can imagine in to the baskets.

We've got one for the Yellow Team, one for the Red Team.

The winning team is the one to get the most prize discs

out of there and in to there.

And they will get to take home all the prizes written on the discs.

The losing team doesn't take the prizes home.

They have to blow them up in a bidet.

OK. You have some time to get as many discs from the septic tank

to the baskets as possible.

Red Team, you're ahead on points.

Those have bought you a five-second advantage,

so when you hear the first siren, Red, you start.

But Yellows, pay attention and listen carefully.

As soon as you hear the second siren,

that's your cue to start looking for those prize discs.

OK. You have some time. And that some time starts...now!

And away go the Reds. They're not afraid to get stuck in to the muck.

There goes the second siren to release the Yellows.

The Reds already have one prize disc in their net.

The Yellows bagged their first one.

ALARM GOES OFF

Oh! Oh, yeah.

I've done it again. I forgot to tell them

that every now and again, some more hideous gunge

comes down those pipes and tends to land on your head.

I think they've found that out now, but sometimes,

it does bring prize discs with it, so I think in the long run,

they'll be pleased...ish.

I really should look into my lab's drainage system.

It is a festival of gunge in there.

The Yellows look to be getting into their stride now,

scooping up prize discs all over the place.

Louie's lost his hat. Not good as it's raining gunge and prize discs.

I'll be honest, I'm not sure how the gunge has turned brown.

Another one for the Reds, there. Stan's checking for any duds.

It's a good tactic, that.

Yellows need to hurry up cos the Reds have the edge at the moment.

Alex slam dunks two prize discs.

Just in time.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

That is it, teams. Time is up.

Nice in there, isn't it?

Yeah. You've really been swimming in there, haven't you? OK.

Sorry about not warning you about the pipes. I forgot. Always do.

Right. Lab rats are counting up the prize discs right now as I speak.

So, for the Red Team, lab rat, how many have the reds got?

Show me with your little paws.

Eight prize discs for the Reds.

And now for the Yellows.

Lab rat, how many do we have?

Seven. It was so close. It's the Red team that win.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Well done, Reds. Well done, Reds.

All of these prizes are yours. Let's have a look.

You're each taking home each of the prizes. Ready, Ninja Nan?

A toxic mutant.

A flying windcopter.

Planetarium.

Blood, Bones, Body Bits kit.

A science magic set.

An MP3 player.

You've done very well, very well, Reds.

A white wings glider kit.

And a lunar eclipse bedroom light.

Each of the Red Team, each of those prizes.

Well done, team.

Well done, team. Yellows, this is slightly difficult now because,

well, there's no nice way of saying this.

This is what you would have won.

Remote control mosquito. Lovely.

A lunar eclipse bedroom light.

Would have been nice. Toxic mutants. Each.

Would have been lovely.

Horrible Science books. Yeah.

Blood, Bones, Body Bits kit.

White wings glider kit. And the science magic set.

But don't worry, Yellows, because instead of taking them home,

you can blow them all up, because it is now time for Bidet Goes Bang.

Well, that time is upon us once again.

Reds, you're feeling great. Look at all these prizes!

You're taking them home Congratulations.

Yellows, sorry. How are you feeling?

-Disappointed but not disheartened.

-OK.

Why didn't you win? What went wrong in the game, do you think?

Well, we all... In the gunge, it was hard to sort of walk.

It is difficult to move around and find those discs.

And I kept getting pulled down.

That doesn't help!

It was a close score, seven-eight, that really was.

It was a riot in there. Well, bad luck. Who's gonna do the plunger?

-All of us.

-You'll share the blame together.

OK. Well, the moment is very nearly here.

I've seen plenty of good inventions go down the toilet

and most of my experiments go up in smoke,

but your prizes are about to do both at once

in my specially reinforced exploding bidet.

Prizes are in there ready, so, well, let's get on with it. Step forwards.

Lift the plunger, please, and be ready.

We will get you down. All right, Yellow Team? Audience...

ALL: Five. Four. Three. Two. One.

HUGE EXPLOSION

Unfortunately, we are out of time. Today you might say we've had

an in-depth look at particles and aerodynamics.

Or you might say we mucked about with go-karts and hairdryers.

They're both right but just tell your mum we did the first one.

See you next time.

Blast Lab was recorded before a live studio audience.

No lab rat was harmed during the filming.

Well, actually, one was but he was put down, painlessly.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

E-mail [email protected]