Browse content similar to Bardalicious. Check below for episodes and series from the same categories and more!
Line | From | To | |
---|---|---|---|
Guess who's got two tickets to the Wrestle Madness arena tour today? | 0:00:02 | 0:00:05 | |
-Oh, my Gaga. -Coolio. I didn't think you'd want to come. | 0:00:05 | 0:00:08 | |
I don't. I just saw that. | 0:00:08 | 0:00:11 | |
Yowser. Nice, um, deckchair | 0:00:11 | 0:00:14 | |
and...glass? | 0:00:14 | 0:00:16 | |
Actually, it's a manacle. | 0:00:16 | 0:00:19 | |
-Monocle? -What she said. And it's not a deckchair. | 0:00:19 | 0:00:23 | |
-It's a director's chair. -So what are the cape and the cap? | 0:00:23 | 0:00:27 | |
A cape and a cap. Dur! | 0:00:27 | 0:00:29 | |
I, Kit Karter, am directing the Y's first theatre extravaganza! | 0:00:29 | 0:00:33 | |
-APPLAUSE -Thank you, I know. Overdue, you say? | 0:00:33 | 0:00:37 | |
You? You couldn't direct traffic. How did you get Ms V to agree to that? | 0:00:37 | 0:00:41 | |
Dur! She thinks I'm a creative genius. | 0:00:41 | 0:00:44 | |
OK, I told her there's moolah in theatres and we struck a deal. | 0:00:44 | 0:00:49 | |
She gets 75% of the ticket profit, | 0:00:49 | 0:00:50 | |
plus 75% of the remaining 25%, plus 10% commission. | 0:00:50 | 0:00:55 | |
-That's not a deal, it's a stitch-up! -Bless you! | 0:00:55 | 0:00:58 | |
I thought you wanted to be an actor, not a director? | 0:00:58 | 0:01:01 | |
My acting coach says I'm wasting my time with stage, | 0:01:01 | 0:01:05 | |
which means I need to take on a bigger role. | 0:01:05 | 0:01:08 | |
So which big sparkling musical will you be directing? | 0:01:08 | 0:01:11 | |
None. To make it as a director, you've got to go serious. | 0:01:11 | 0:01:14 | |
That's why I'm tackling the Bard. | 0:01:14 | 0:01:16 | |
William Shakespeare. | 0:01:16 | 0:01:18 | |
BOTH: Awesome! | 0:01:18 | 0:01:20 | |
Which one of his masterpieces will you be annihilating? | 0:01:20 | 0:01:23 | |
All of them. | 0:01:23 | 0:01:24 | |
It's called Two Gentlemen's Much Ado About Romeo And Juliet | 0:01:24 | 0:01:27 | |
In A Midsummer Night's Tempest. It's all his hits. | 0:01:27 | 0:01:30 | |
Now 1600. | 0:01:30 | 0:01:32 | |
Oh, despicable! | 0:01:32 | 0:01:33 | |
As co-founder and president of the school Shakespeare society, | 0:01:33 | 0:01:37 | |
I prohibit, nay ban, nay forbid... | 0:01:37 | 0:01:39 | |
Oh, bored. Must dash, I'm meeting my cast. | 0:01:39 | 0:01:43 | |
Romeo, or should I say Taylor, needs directing. | 0:01:43 | 0:01:46 | |
'OMLG, Taylor is playing Romeo?!' | 0:01:46 | 0:01:49 | |
# When I see your face... # | 0:01:49 | 0:01:52 | |
I have to play Juliet! I mean, I'm free for rehearsals. | 0:01:52 | 0:01:57 | |
I thought you wanted to go to that Wrestle Madness? | 0:01:57 | 0:02:00 | |
Er...no tickets left, drat! Can I have the part, please, please? | 0:02:00 | 0:02:04 | |
Mucho apologies, I only have the back legs of the donkey left. | 0:02:04 | 0:02:07 | |
Theresa Babcock worked her socks off for the front. | 0:02:07 | 0:02:10 | |
Who's playing Juliet? | 0:02:10 | 0:02:12 | |
I just know this is going to bring Tay-Tay and me back together. | 0:02:12 | 0:02:15 | |
For ever. And ever. | 0:02:15 | 0:02:18 | |
The end. | 0:02:18 | 0:02:19 | |
I know I say this a lot, but...nooooooo! | 0:02:19 | 0:02:22 | |
# Won't somebody tell me why I'm always surrounded by boys? | 0:02:22 | 0:02:27 | |
# Give me a break | 0:02:27 | 0:02:29 | |
# They've got attitude Kind of cute | 0:02:29 | 0:02:31 | |
# But when they're in trouble It takes a girl | 0:02:31 | 0:02:34 | |
# To save the day, to save the day | 0:02:34 | 0:02:36 | |
# I'd love another girl Around the place | 0:02:36 | 0:02:39 | |
# Could you be her? | 0:02:39 | 0:02:41 | |
# Someone to back me up so I always | 0:02:41 | 0:02:43 | |
# Have the last word | 0:02:43 | 0:02:44 | |
# I guess it's hard To be the only girl | 0:02:44 | 0:02:46 | |
# In a boys' world | 0:02:46 | 0:02:49 | |
# Girl, girl | 0:02:49 | 0:02:51 | |
# In a boys' world | 0:02:51 | 0:02:53 | |
# I know I'm strong because I've got a positive | 0:02:53 | 0:02:56 | |
# Mental attitude | 0:02:56 | 0:02:57 | |
# Understanding, kind and sensitive | 0:02:57 | 0:03:00 | |
# Don't want gratitude | 0:03:00 | 0:03:01 | |
# I just don't wanna be The only girl | 0:03:01 | 0:03:04 | |
# In a boys' world. # | 0:03:04 | 0:03:06 | |
Please tell me you're happy cos we've had a cancellation, boss. | 0:03:06 | 0:03:10 | |
I can't do any more overtime, I'm spent. | 0:03:10 | 0:03:12 | |
-No need. We have an extra pair of hands helping today. -Whose hands? | 0:03:12 | 0:03:15 | |
-Guilty! -This is Justin. | 0:03:15 | 0:03:18 | |
He's a trainee mechanic at the local college. | 0:03:18 | 0:03:20 | |
-I prefer automobile technician, actually, Mr Jenkins. -Gotcha, yes. | 0:03:20 | 0:03:25 | |
Anything to keep him happy. | 0:03:25 | 0:03:27 | |
He's been here since six and he's free. | 0:03:27 | 0:03:30 | |
What do you need a new trainee for? Aren't I enough? | 0:03:30 | 0:03:33 | |
You're enough all right. | 0:03:37 | 0:03:39 | |
Hey, look, er... | 0:03:42 | 0:03:44 | |
The thing is, I was... | 0:03:44 | 0:03:46 | |
thinking...it's about time... you...had your own apprentice. | 0:03:46 | 0:03:52 | |
-Seriously? -Yeah. | 0:03:52 | 0:03:53 | |
-Wicked! -Well... -I've been wanting my own apprentice since I became one! | 0:03:54 | 0:03:59 | |
That is, like, proper awesome, Steve. Cheers, big guy! | 0:03:59 | 0:04:03 | |
Well, that's the sort of big guy I am, eh? | 0:04:03 | 0:04:06 | |
Right. What shall I teach him first? | 0:04:06 | 0:04:09 | |
You could start by sorting out the tracking. | 0:04:09 | 0:04:11 | |
Got it, no probs, done deal. | 0:04:11 | 0:04:14 | |
Do you want to teach me how to sort the tracking on it first, boss? | 0:04:16 | 0:04:20 | |
Oh, that I wear a glove upon that hand that I might touch that cheek. | 0:04:25 | 0:04:28 | |
Mind the bling, Taylor! | 0:04:28 | 0:04:30 | |
She speaks! | 0:04:30 | 0:04:32 | |
Dur, obvs! What's he think this is, a gerbil? | 0:04:32 | 0:04:35 | |
Speak again, bright angel! | 0:04:35 | 0:04:37 | |
O Romeo, Romeo! Wherefore art thou... Ow! | 0:04:37 | 0:04:41 | |
Ow, I just had that big toe re-jewelled! | 0:04:41 | 0:04:44 | |
Oh, this is a pile-up, I can't watch! | 0:04:44 | 0:04:47 | |
I know, right! | 0:04:47 | 0:04:48 | |
Luckily, I have a plan to get rid of the tiny-brained one - | 0:04:48 | 0:04:51 | |
Ashlii. | 0:04:51 | 0:04:52 | |
I will play Juliet. Make no mistake. | 0:04:52 | 0:04:56 | |
OK, so, the good news is, the Juliet balcony's arrived. | 0:04:56 | 0:04:59 | |
The bad news is Ashlii hasn't had the health and safety briefing | 0:04:59 | 0:05:03 | |
on how to use it. | 0:05:03 | 0:05:04 | |
Unlike myself. | 0:05:04 | 0:05:06 | |
That's fine. She can wear this till she does. | 0:05:06 | 0:05:09 | |
Quelle emergency? | 0:05:14 | 0:05:15 | |
It's this! I'm pretty sure the purists | 0:05:15 | 0:05:18 | |
won't mind too much you giving Richard III a freestyle jazz number, | 0:05:18 | 0:05:22 | |
but I think they'll kick up a fuss about the Juliet oversight. | 0:05:22 | 0:05:26 | |
-Oversight? -Ye-huh. | 0:05:26 | 0:05:27 | |
Didn't you read the description? | 0:05:27 | 0:05:29 | |
It says here, | 0:05:29 | 0:05:31 | |
"Juliet must be played by a blonde girl in pigtails and dungarees." | 0:05:31 | 0:05:35 | |
Mon cherie! It's the theatre. | 0:05:38 | 0:05:42 | |
That's why we have wigs and costumes. | 0:05:42 | 0:05:46 | |
Which reminds me. Your hind legs just came in. | 0:05:46 | 0:05:48 | |
Aren't they divine? Ciao! | 0:05:48 | 0:05:51 | |
Huh. Right! | 0:05:51 | 0:05:53 | |
That's it. I'm officially up the creek without a paddle. | 0:05:53 | 0:05:57 | |
Unless... | 0:05:57 | 0:05:59 | |
I somehow find a way of getting Ashlii into a canoe, | 0:05:59 | 0:06:03 | |
then taking away her paddle. Could that work? | 0:06:03 | 0:06:06 | |
No! You're as bad as Kit. | 0:06:06 | 0:06:07 | |
Between you, you'll totally ruin the story of the star-crossed lovers. | 0:06:07 | 0:06:12 | |
What makes you think you'd be any better than Ashlii as Juliet? | 0:06:12 | 0:06:15 | |
-Deeds, you're supposed to be on my side! -I'm on the Bard's side. | 0:06:15 | 0:06:19 | |
In fact, I refuse to put up with this desecration of his work | 0:06:19 | 0:06:23 | |
any longer. I'm going to get this production stopped. | 0:06:23 | 0:06:26 | |
Ow! | 0:06:26 | 0:06:28 | |
Skullcrusher II. Let the skull-crushing commence! | 0:06:31 | 0:06:34 | |
-Yes! -No. | 0:06:34 | 0:06:37 | |
Don't ask me what's wrong. | 0:06:37 | 0:06:39 | |
I'm too upset to talk about it. | 0:06:39 | 0:06:42 | |
OK. | 0:06:42 | 0:06:43 | |
OK, fine, I'll tell you what's wrong. | 0:06:46 | 0:06:49 | |
Luke, my dancing partner, blew me out for a footy match. | 0:06:49 | 0:06:53 | |
We're supposed to do the amateur dance | 0:06:53 | 0:06:55 | |
for the Strictly Come Dancing tour on Friday. | 0:06:55 | 0:06:57 | |
I'll never find someone to dance with me now. | 0:06:57 | 0:07:00 | |
Why don't boys like Strictly?! | 0:07:00 | 0:07:03 | |
BOTH: What? We do! | 0:07:03 | 0:07:05 | |
-'Sorry, Len, but that was a...' -ALL: Disaster! | 0:07:05 | 0:07:09 | |
When do you want me to start rehearsing? | 0:07:09 | 0:07:11 | |
You?! I don't think so! | 0:07:11 | 0:07:13 | |
She likes me, so I get to be her dance partner. | 0:07:13 | 0:07:17 | |
Right, Imogen? | 0:07:17 | 0:07:18 | |
Dream on. I'm not about to mess up in front of Alesha Dixon, | 0:07:18 | 0:07:21 | |
just because I like you. | 0:07:21 | 0:07:23 | |
Only the best hip-shaker gets to take me to the glitter ball. | 0:07:23 | 0:07:27 | |
The show's in two days. Better start brushing up your dance moves, boys. | 0:07:27 | 0:07:31 | |
Top score gets the gig. | 0:07:31 | 0:07:33 | |
THEME FROM STRICTLY COME DANCING PLAYS | 0:07:33 | 0:07:39 | |
# Baby, we're just friends What are you saying? # | 0:07:46 | 0:07:49 | |
What is it with these witches? | 0:07:49 | 0:07:51 | |
Have they never done a box step to Bieber before? | 0:07:51 | 0:07:54 | |
HOOTER | 0:07:54 | 0:07:56 | |
Good news, my lord. My old mucker and theatre stalwart, | 0:07:57 | 0:08:00 | |
Madame De Groot, will be gracing us with presence at your performance. | 0:08:00 | 0:08:04 | |
Oo-arr. | 0:08:04 | 0:08:06 | |
Look, Ms V, I know you want to feel part of the play, | 0:08:06 | 0:08:09 | |
but your ye olde accent is seriously pants. | 0:08:09 | 0:08:11 | |
Fine! | 0:08:11 | 0:08:13 | |
All I wanted to say was that my close friend and theatre critic, | 0:08:13 | 0:08:17 | |
Irma De Groot, will be watching your little performance. | 0:08:17 | 0:08:20 | |
OMLG! | 0:08:20 | 0:08:21 | |
Do you mean that Irma De Groot, the renowned Twitterererer? | 0:08:21 | 0:08:25 | |
-Yes. -Argh! | 0:08:25 | 0:08:27 | |
She killed Phil Mitchell The Musical before she even left the theatre. | 0:08:27 | 0:08:32 | |
Then your play had better be good. | 0:08:32 | 0:08:34 | |
A positive review can have a massive effect on the shnoodles on seats. | 0:08:34 | 0:08:38 | |
Talking of which, we have not sold nearly enough tickets. | 0:08:38 | 0:08:41 | |
I hope you have not been lying to me | 0:08:41 | 0:08:44 | |
about popularity of this diner theatre, Kitty-Kat. | 0:08:44 | 0:08:48 | |
TOOT! | 0:08:48 | 0:08:49 | |
Kit! This donkey costume is seriously doing my head in. | 0:08:52 | 0:08:55 | |
-What's going on? -Irma De Groot! | 0:08:55 | 0:08:57 | |
One wrong word from her and my directing career is over. | 0:08:57 | 0:09:00 | |
O-V-U-H! Before it began! | 0:09:00 | 0:09:03 | |
I can't afford to have amateurs on stage, with her in the audience. | 0:09:03 | 0:09:07 | |
This is one major-tastic problem! | 0:09:10 | 0:09:13 | |
Problem? He wants to try dressing as a donkey butt, | 0:09:13 | 0:09:16 | |
when what you want is to play Juliet opposite a boy you totally dig, | 0:09:16 | 0:09:20 | |
but has no idea you exist. | 0:09:20 | 0:09:22 | |
-Why can't someone throw me a bone?! -Could someone run lines with me? | 0:09:22 | 0:09:26 | |
Ashlii's having her big toe be-jewelled. Again. | 0:09:26 | 0:09:28 | |
Thank you! | 0:09:28 | 0:09:29 | |
I'll do it. | 0:09:29 | 0:09:31 | |
Bless you, Sass! | 0:09:31 | 0:09:33 | |
I need to go collect my fort. | 0:09:33 | 0:09:36 | |
You're in early. | 0:09:41 | 0:09:42 | |
-Got to be, ain't I? Now I'm the boss. -Technically, I am still... | 0:09:42 | 0:09:46 | |
Check it out! It's my list of dos and don'ts for my apprentice. | 0:09:46 | 0:09:50 | |
I'm well impressed. | 0:09:50 | 0:09:52 | |
I never realised you had such a wealth of experience | 0:09:52 | 0:09:55 | |
when it came to... | 0:09:55 | 0:09:57 | |
-making tea. -Yeah, well, it's not so much about mechanics. | 0:09:57 | 0:10:01 | |
It's about working here. | 0:10:01 | 0:10:02 | |
Anyone can change a tyre or fix a blown gasket. | 0:10:02 | 0:10:06 | |
Really? I thought you hadn't... | 0:10:06 | 0:10:07 | |
But it takes a really skilled member of staff to know | 0:10:07 | 0:10:10 | |
not to over-fill the kettle or you'll scorch your pinkie. | 0:10:10 | 0:10:14 | |
And to give Steve an extra biscuit in the morning, or he'll get grumpy. | 0:10:14 | 0:10:18 | |
-I do not! -I think you do, Mr Jenkins. | 0:10:18 | 0:10:21 | |
Morning, Keith. | 0:10:21 | 0:10:23 | |
Two for me, three for you. | 0:10:23 | 0:10:25 | |
-Ah. -How do you know that? | 0:10:25 | 0:10:27 | |
Fast learner! | 0:10:27 | 0:10:28 | |
It also helps if you give him a soupcon of extra sugar in his tea | 0:10:28 | 0:10:32 | |
and bring him the newspaper. | 0:10:32 | 0:10:34 | |
Ah, well, that's where you're wrong. | 0:10:34 | 0:10:36 | |
Roger mauls it in the morning, so it's practically unreadable. | 0:10:36 | 0:10:39 | |
Not if you pop to the newsagent the previous evening | 0:10:39 | 0:10:42 | |
and give him a stack of zip-lock bags to keep it tidy. | 0:10:42 | 0:10:44 | |
Ah! What's he like, eh? All of this, and he's sorted out | 0:10:46 | 0:10:50 | |
the backlog of work this morning. | 0:10:50 | 0:10:52 | |
Then he started cold-calling customers to drum up trade. | 0:10:52 | 0:10:55 | |
I prefer the phrase "telecommunication marketing". | 0:10:55 | 0:10:59 | |
Ah, he-he! He can call it what he likes as long as it works. | 0:10:59 | 0:11:02 | |
Yeah, whatever. | 0:11:02 | 0:11:03 | |
I'll go and make my own tea, shall I? | 0:11:06 | 0:11:08 | |
Don't over-fill it, or you'll scorch your pinkie. | 0:11:08 | 0:11:12 | |
HE CHUCKLES | 0:11:12 | 0:11:13 | |
Ahem! "Dear Mr Kit Karter, | 0:11:21 | 0:11:23 | |
"On behalf of all 14 members of the school Shakespeare society, | 0:11:23 | 0:11:27 | |
"we're writing to inform you that we are in the process | 0:11:27 | 0:11:30 | |
"of petitioning the Globe Theatre, London, | 0:11:30 | 0:11:32 | |
"to halt your ongoing creative crimes against the Bard and his work...". | 0:11:32 | 0:11:37 | |
Talk to the manacle, cos the cap ain't listening. | 0:11:37 | 0:11:40 | |
It's a MONOCLE, you muppet! | 0:11:40 | 0:11:42 | |
What you don't understand is that... | 0:11:42 | 0:11:44 | |
Oh, me. | 0:11:44 | 0:11:45 | |
She speaks! Oh, speak again, bright angel, | 0:11:45 | 0:11:49 | |
for thou art as glorious as night being o'er my head. | 0:11:49 | 0:11:52 | |
O Romeo, Romeo! Wherefore art thou, Romeo? | 0:11:52 | 0:11:55 | |
Deny thy father and refuse thy name | 0:11:55 | 0:11:58 | |
or, if thou wilt not, | 0:11:58 | 0:12:00 | |
be but sworn, my love, and I'll no longer be a Capulet. | 0:12:00 | 0:12:04 | |
I know, I know. Don't say it. | 0:12:06 | 0:12:08 | |
I got a lot of work to do. | 0:12:08 | 0:12:10 | |
-It wasn't that bad, was it? -Bad? | 0:12:11 | 0:12:13 | |
It was perfect! | 0:12:13 | 0:12:15 | |
You and him and... | 0:12:15 | 0:12:17 | |
You were born to play Romeo and Juliet! | 0:12:17 | 0:12:19 | |
-But you said... -I was wrong, I admit! And I never admit it. | 0:12:19 | 0:12:22 | |
When Ashlii and Taylor read it, it was dead, | 0:12:22 | 0:12:25 | |
but with you two, it came from the heart. | 0:12:25 | 0:12:27 | |
-Seriously? -Yes! You two belong on stage. | 0:12:27 | 0:12:30 | |
You have to do something to get rid of Ashlii as Juliet! | 0:12:30 | 0:12:33 | |
Put your back into it, Babcock! Not that way, that way! | 0:12:33 | 0:12:37 | |
-If you don't, I'll take her down myself! -Argh! | 0:12:37 | 0:12:40 | |
Oww! | 0:12:40 | 0:12:42 | |
Owww! | 0:12:42 | 0:12:44 | |
I know how that looks, but that was not intentional, I swear. | 0:12:44 | 0:12:48 | |
Oh, my Gaga! Our beautiful Juliet is down. She can't perform like this! | 0:12:48 | 0:12:52 | |
We need a talented actress to replace her, right now. | 0:12:52 | 0:12:55 | |
-Or someone who knows all her lines. -I do! | 0:12:55 | 0:12:57 | |
-You've got the gig. -Yes! | 0:12:57 | 0:12:59 | |
BOTH: Go, Sassy, go, Sassy, go, Sassy! | 0:12:59 | 0:13:02 | |
-Taylor, I'm demoting you to donkey's hind legs. -Why? | 0:13:02 | 0:13:04 | |
Being so new to this art. | 0:13:04 | 0:13:07 | |
You need a seasoned entertainer by your side. | 0:13:07 | 0:13:10 | |
Namely, moi, Kit Karter's officially come out of acting retirement. | 0:13:10 | 0:13:14 | |
You can't. | 0:13:14 | 0:13:16 | |
Why, how hard can it be to direct myself? Hand, move, see. | 0:13:16 | 0:13:20 | |
# There's a fire starting in my heart | 0:13:22 | 0:13:26 | |
# Reaching a fever pitch | 0:13:26 | 0:13:29 | |
# It's bringing me out the dark | 0:13:29 | 0:13:32 | |
# See how I'll leave With every piece of you | 0:13:32 | 0:13:35 | |
# Don't underestimate... # | 0:13:35 | 0:13:38 | |
No. Oh. If we're going to be ready | 0:13:38 | 0:13:41 | |
for the Strictly audition on Friday we need proper help. | 0:13:41 | 0:13:43 | |
If only we knew someone as twinkle-toed as Bruno Tonioli. | 0:13:43 | 0:13:46 | |
As versatile as Len Goodman. | 0:13:46 | 0:13:48 | |
And as strictly flamboyant as a young Craig Revel Horwood. | 0:13:48 | 0:13:52 | |
BOTH: Kit! | 0:13:54 | 0:13:55 | |
If you teach me to dance I'll give you all my pocket money | 0:13:55 | 0:13:58 | |
for a whole month. | 0:13:58 | 0:13:59 | |
If you teach me how to dance | 0:13:59 | 0:14:01 | |
I'll give you all my pocket money for two weeks. | 0:14:01 | 0:14:04 | |
-Aren't you supposed to up the offer? -I get a lot more pocket money. | 0:14:04 | 0:14:07 | |
Boys, save your pennies. I don't have time to teach you anything. | 0:14:07 | 0:14:12 | |
I'm directing, producing and starring and rewriting a Shakespeare play. | 0:14:12 | 0:14:16 | |
Man, did he need spell check. | 0:14:16 | 0:14:19 | |
So how are we going to learn to dance? | 0:14:19 | 0:14:21 | |
Aren't you two forgetting you've got a tidy little mover closer to home? | 0:14:21 | 0:14:27 | |
# Night fever, night fever | 0:14:30 | 0:14:32 | |
# We know how to do it, | 0:14:32 | 0:14:35 | |
# Gimme that night fever, night fever. # | 0:14:37 | 0:14:40 | |
BOTH: Of course, Keith! | 0:14:40 | 0:14:41 | |
OK, so we are agreed. Now that Taylor is the back of the donkey, | 0:14:48 | 0:14:52 | |
I have to be the front. | 0:14:52 | 0:14:54 | |
Which means operation boot-up Babcock is a go-go. Yes? | 0:14:54 | 0:14:57 | |
I vowed to protect Shakespeare's legacy where I see it under threat. | 0:14:57 | 0:15:00 | |
Any way we can get you and Taylor playing opposite one another | 0:15:00 | 0:15:03 | |
works for me because it works for the play. | 0:15:03 | 0:15:05 | |
A simple yes would have been fine. | 0:15:05 | 0:15:07 | |
Hey, Theresa, how would you like to swap roles with Sadie? | 0:15:10 | 0:15:13 | |
She'd love to, wouldn't you? I mean Juliet, donkey's head, no contest. | 0:15:13 | 0:15:16 | |
No thanks, I've been working on my character motivation for weeks. | 0:15:16 | 0:15:19 | |
Even slept in a stable to, you know, get the feeling right. | 0:15:19 | 0:15:22 | |
Man, she really wants this. | 0:15:22 | 0:15:24 | |
And besides Taylor Bell's my hind legs and he's all types of hot. | 0:15:24 | 0:15:28 | |
Don't you get it? Sadie and Taylor are perfect together! | 0:15:28 | 0:15:33 | |
We've all had to make sacrifices here. | 0:15:33 | 0:15:35 | |
I had to tell the Shakespeare Society I was on board | 0:15:35 | 0:15:38 | |
with a production that had Lady Macbeth clubbing in Faliraki. | 0:15:38 | 0:15:41 | |
Oh, come on, Babcock, please. | 0:15:43 | 0:15:46 | |
Leave it, Sass, we tried, OK. | 0:15:46 | 0:15:48 | |
If you don't do this, I'll make sure every nerd in the school | 0:15:49 | 0:15:52 | |
knows that you couldn't spell the word oscilloscope, | 0:15:52 | 0:15:54 | |
that's why you only got 99% in your physics test. | 0:15:54 | 0:15:57 | |
-Not because you ran out of time. -That was meant to be our secret. | 0:15:57 | 0:16:01 | |
Not any more. I don't want to do this, Theresa, | 0:16:01 | 0:16:03 | |
but my dedication to the Bard is forcing my hand. | 0:16:03 | 0:16:06 | |
Fine, take the part but you'll have to find someone else to be Juliet. | 0:16:06 | 0:16:09 | |
I could never get the back story right in time | 0:16:09 | 0:16:12 | |
and method acting is everything to me. | 0:16:12 | 0:16:14 | |
She's a maths major, attention to detail is everything to her. | 0:16:16 | 0:16:20 | |
Sadie and Taylor are perfect together. | 0:16:22 | 0:16:25 | |
Not on my turf. | 0:16:25 | 0:16:28 | |
So any luck with the potential Juliets? | 0:16:33 | 0:16:35 | |
I'm down to two, Ms V and you. | 0:16:35 | 0:16:40 | |
Oh, I never thought I'd say this | 0:16:40 | 0:16:43 | |
but the Bard actually had it easy compared to Kit. | 0:16:43 | 0:16:46 | |
He could even get guys to play women. | 0:16:46 | 0:16:48 | |
Deeds, you're a genius. | 0:16:48 | 0:16:51 | |
Thank you so much, Sass, you are totally right that you were | 0:16:51 | 0:16:53 | |
totally wrong to play the part of Juliet. | 0:16:53 | 0:16:55 | |
Playing both the lovers is going to be my greatest acting challenge yet. | 0:16:55 | 0:17:00 | |
Irma de Groot is going to think she has died and gone to theatre heaven. | 0:17:00 | 0:17:03 | |
-Like taking candy from a baby. -Yes. | 0:17:07 | 0:17:11 | |
Now all you need to do is break the good news to Taylor. | 0:17:11 | 0:17:13 | |
0K, Taylor, I think it's time we had, the chat. | 0:17:13 | 0:17:17 | |
The chat? | 0:17:17 | 0:17:19 | |
-About getting back together. -You dumped me. | 0:17:19 | 0:17:21 | |
Duh, we all make mistakes. | 0:17:21 | 0:17:23 | |
Yesterday I actually bought green with pink, | 0:17:23 | 0:17:26 | |
but being a semi-style icon | 0:17:26 | 0:17:27 | |
I could just about pull it off. Obvs. | 0:17:27 | 0:17:30 | |
So, we're back on, yeah? | 0:17:30 | 0:17:31 | |
Er, I don't think so. | 0:17:31 | 0:17:33 | |
In that case, please accept this as a goodbye present. | 0:17:34 | 0:17:38 | |
Oh, thanks, what is it? | 0:17:38 | 0:17:40 | |
The dos and don'ts of acting, dummy. | 0:17:40 | 0:17:42 | |
You're on stage in less than 24 hours and, believe me, | 0:17:42 | 0:17:45 | |
you need all the help you can get. | 0:17:45 | 0:17:46 | |
-Look, it's full of amazing tips. -Oh, really? | 0:17:46 | 0:17:50 | |
Oh, yeah, like it says here, under no circumstances must you talk to, | 0:17:50 | 0:17:53 | |
or even look at, your fellow cast members on the day of the show. | 0:17:53 | 0:17:56 | |
-Why not? -Bad luck, apparently, | 0:17:56 | 0:17:58 | |
like saying "Macbeth" instead of "the Scottish play." | 0:17:58 | 0:18:01 | |
Ooops, sorry. | 0:18:01 | 0:18:03 | |
-I mean, you don't want to wreck the show, do you? -No. | 0:18:03 | 0:18:06 | |
In that case you better ignore everyone, and I mean everyone. | 0:18:06 | 0:18:11 | |
Hit it. Now prepare to be amazed. | 0:18:15 | 0:18:18 | |
To watch in wonder as the Keith Meister... | 0:18:18 | 0:18:20 | |
Just get on with it. | 0:18:20 | 0:18:22 | |
# So I said, what....# | 0:18:28 | 0:18:32 | |
-What, too much for you? -No. | 0:18:32 | 0:18:35 | |
-I thought you said you could dance? You go to enough clubs. -Yeah. | 0:18:35 | 0:18:39 | |
And that's what I do there. That's what everyone does. | 0:18:39 | 0:18:42 | |
Not everyone. | 0:18:42 | 0:18:45 | |
Music maestro? | 0:18:45 | 0:18:46 | |
FAST MUSIC PLAYS | 0:18:47 | 0:18:51 | |
BOTH: Wow! | 0:19:04 | 0:19:05 | |
Practice makes perfect, boys. | 0:19:05 | 0:19:07 | |
There's no secret, you need the right partner. | 0:19:07 | 0:19:09 | |
Is there anything you can't do? | 0:19:09 | 0:19:10 | |
Well, I'm not that hot with the ladies. | 0:19:10 | 0:19:15 | |
Kidding, I'm on fire. | 0:19:15 | 0:19:18 | |
Taylor, Taylor, have you seen Taylor Bell? | 0:19:21 | 0:19:25 | |
He's about yay high, totally delicious | 0:19:25 | 0:19:27 | |
-Taylor, I bring good news. -Don't talk to me. | 0:19:29 | 0:19:32 | |
What's up with him? | 0:19:32 | 0:19:35 | |
Oh, I wish he wouldn't be like that, it's so not nice. | 0:19:35 | 0:19:39 | |
How are you supposed to know he asked me to go back out with him? | 0:19:39 | 0:19:41 | |
-He what? -Yeah, it's awesome innit? | 0:19:41 | 0:19:44 | |
But, just because he's made his choice, | 0:19:44 | 0:19:47 | |
and it's not you, that's no excuse for being so horrific. | 0:19:47 | 0:19:51 | |
I mean he might think you're a loser, desperado, nonentity. | 0:19:51 | 0:19:56 | |
He said that? | 0:19:56 | 0:19:57 | |
That was the edited version. | 0:19:57 | 0:19:59 | |
-But I don't understand? -What's not understand, he hates me. | 0:20:05 | 0:20:10 | |
As if. | 0:20:10 | 0:20:11 | |
There must be some kind of mistake. | 0:20:11 | 0:20:13 | |
Yes, listening to you was a big mistake, | 0:20:13 | 0:20:16 | |
-huge, mammoth, megamongus. -Me? | 0:20:16 | 0:20:19 | |
Yeah, you started all this. | 0:20:19 | 0:20:20 | |
You said we'd make a perfect star-crossed lovers. | 0:20:20 | 0:20:23 | |
I thought you meant in real life but | 0:20:23 | 0:20:25 | |
-you were just talking about your stupid play. -That's not true. | 0:20:25 | 0:20:28 | |
I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation | 0:20:28 | 0:20:30 | |
why Taylor's blanking you. | 0:20:30 | 0:20:32 | |
This happens in the Bard's plays all the time. | 0:20:32 | 0:20:34 | |
The third act mix up. | 0:20:34 | 0:20:36 | |
Then something happens to resolve it | 0:20:36 | 0:20:38 | |
and they all live happily ever after. | 0:20:38 | 0:20:40 | |
Unless it's Hamlet. Or Macbeth. | 0:20:42 | 0:20:44 | |
Dede, get a grip, this is my life and you've messed it up. | 0:20:44 | 0:20:47 | |
That's not true, I know I'm right about this | 0:20:47 | 0:20:49 | |
just give me a chance to prove it. | 0:20:49 | 0:20:51 | |
No. Give Theresa Babcock her donkey leggings back. | 0:20:51 | 0:20:54 | |
There is no way I am getting in to that costume with Taylor Bell. | 0:20:54 | 0:20:57 | |
End of. | 0:20:57 | 0:20:59 | |
Then I'll take Taylor's place | 0:20:59 | 0:21:01 | |
and we can go in it together as sisters and comrades. | 0:21:01 | 0:21:04 | |
-Fine, whatever. -OK, see you. | 0:21:04 | 0:21:06 | |
-Steve, I need a word. -Oh. That's a word. | 0:21:09 | 0:21:14 | |
It's Justin, my apprentice, I'm thinking of letting him go. | 0:21:14 | 0:21:18 | |
-Hold on, I'm his apprentice? -No, er yes, it's a long story. | 0:21:18 | 0:21:22 | |
Look, the point is, I think he's done all he can do here. | 0:21:22 | 0:21:26 | |
Yeah, he has, quite literally. | 0:21:26 | 0:21:28 | |
He's done all the MOTs, every single wheel replacement, | 0:21:28 | 0:21:31 | |
the cracked screens, oil changes and the entire backlog of panel beating. | 0:21:31 | 0:21:35 | |
I'd prefer the term chassis pummelling. | 0:21:35 | 0:21:37 | |
-I don't see what the problem is, he's brilliant. -That is the problem. | 0:21:37 | 0:21:40 | |
He's so good at everything he makes me feel useless. | 0:21:40 | 0:21:42 | |
Oh, don't be daft, you're not... | 0:21:42 | 0:21:45 | |
I mean, he can't be good at everything. | 0:21:45 | 0:21:47 | |
Almost everything. | 0:21:47 | 0:21:50 | |
Look, I think we've found our third amigo here, the third musketeer, | 0:21:50 | 0:21:56 | |
I can see Justin having a long and successful career here at Mr Motors. | 0:21:56 | 0:21:59 | |
Hey, and you as well, mate. | 0:22:01 | 0:22:02 | |
Who knows, in 10 years time you two could be running this place. | 0:22:02 | 0:22:06 | |
I could buy you matching overalls and give you keys to the garage. | 0:22:06 | 0:22:10 | |
And put your name on the sign, | 0:22:10 | 0:22:11 | |
"Steve, Keith and Justin's Mr Motors." | 0:22:11 | 0:22:15 | |
Actually, Mr Jenkins, I've got slightly bigger aspirations. | 0:22:15 | 0:22:20 | |
I want a fleet of high-tech, High Street garages providing | 0:22:20 | 0:22:25 | |
fast, efficient service, fuelled by the correct terminology. | 0:22:25 | 0:22:28 | |
I don't want to be the proprietor of a ramshackle backstreet garage | 0:22:28 | 0:22:32 | |
-that's going nowhere. -You cheeky little... | 0:22:32 | 0:22:35 | |
-You're his boss, get rid of him. -With pleasure. | 0:22:35 | 0:22:38 | |
Justin, with respect, you're fired. | 0:22:38 | 0:22:41 | |
You better be good, these Strictly tickets are like gold dust. | 0:22:47 | 0:22:52 | |
A-one, a-two, a-one, two, three, four. | 0:22:52 | 0:22:56 | |
MUSIC PLAYS | 0:22:56 | 0:23:00 | |
Ow. | 0:23:02 | 0:23:03 | |
So what do you think? | 0:23:07 | 0:23:08 | |
Call that dancing? Get real. Now this is dancing. | 0:23:10 | 0:23:15 | |
-Watch it. -Careful. -Ow! -Ouch. | 0:23:20 | 0:23:24 | |
Ow, my ankle. | 0:23:24 | 0:23:25 | |
It doesn't look like you're going to be dancing any time soon. | 0:23:25 | 0:23:28 | |
Want to bet? Ow! | 0:23:28 | 0:23:32 | |
-You have a nice rest. -I'll go and get my dad. | 0:23:32 | 0:23:34 | |
After we've done a Pasodoble on tour. | 0:23:34 | 0:23:38 | |
Arrgh! | 0:23:43 | 0:23:44 | |
Nonny-nonny no, | 0:23:44 | 0:23:47 | |
one shackalacka shake. | 0:23:47 | 0:23:51 | |
Is this a burger I see before me? | 0:23:56 | 0:23:59 | |
Any sign of Irma de Groot? | 0:24:04 | 0:24:06 | |
She's over there, the little dumpling, eating dumplings. | 0:24:06 | 0:24:09 | |
Break a leg kitty-Kat. | 0:24:09 | 0:24:12 | |
Charming, break one yourself. | 0:24:12 | 0:24:15 | |
Now, | 0:24:19 | 0:24:22 | |
is the winter of our discontent | 0:24:22 | 0:24:26 | |
made glorious summer by the son of York, but who is York | 0:24:26 | 0:24:30 | |
and what is a name by which we call a rose, or a carnation? | 0:24:30 | 0:24:35 | |
Come on, come on we haven't got all day, donkey. Hey, Sass. | 0:24:35 | 0:24:39 | |
Don't say it, I know I'm always late but put it this way, | 0:24:39 | 0:24:42 | |
you're lucky I even came. | 0:24:42 | 0:24:44 | |
-No worries, you're here now. -Glad you made it. | 0:24:44 | 0:24:48 | |
-Deeds, what is up with the voice? -Er, I've got a cold. | 0:24:48 | 0:24:51 | |
-So anyway, had any more thoughts about Taylor? -Uh? Ow. | 0:24:51 | 0:24:55 | |
Hang on... | 0:24:55 | 0:24:58 | |
It is a tale told by an idiot. | 0:24:58 | 0:25:01 | |
A horse, a horse my kingdom for a horse. | 0:25:01 | 0:25:04 | |
I really, really like Taylor but if he doesn't like me then that's OK. | 0:25:04 | 0:25:07 | |
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil. | 0:25:07 | 0:25:10 | |
You can't help who you fall in love with after all. | 0:25:10 | 0:25:12 | |
Oh, Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo? | 0:25:12 | 0:25:16 | |
It's game over because he's asked moosehead, Ashlii back out. | 0:25:16 | 0:25:19 | |
No, I haven't. | 0:25:19 | 0:25:21 | |
The only person I want to ask out right now is you. | 0:25:21 | 0:25:25 | |
And there I pause. | 0:25:26 | 0:25:28 | |
What is so funny? | 0:25:30 | 0:25:32 | |
Come hither, donkey, and lead the way. | 0:25:38 | 0:25:40 | |
That's your cue, big ears, move it! | 0:25:40 | 0:25:42 | |
I said, come hither, donkey, and lead the way! | 0:25:44 | 0:25:49 | |
CHEERING | 0:25:49 | 0:25:51 | |
Sadie, you're ruining my... | 0:25:54 | 0:25:56 | |
ALL CHEER | 0:25:56 | 0:25:58 | |
Just go with it. | 0:26:00 | 0:26:02 | |
Don't worry, I intend to! | 0:26:02 | 0:26:04 | |
CHEERING | 0:26:04 | 0:26:07 | |
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd | 0:26:20 | 0:26:23 | |
Guess what, guys? Irma De Groot loved the show! | 0:26:28 | 0:26:31 | |
She described it "total comic genius." See? | 0:26:31 | 0:26:33 | |
No way! Miss V must be happy. | 0:26:33 | 0:26:36 | |
She also said the menu was a total rip off | 0:26:36 | 0:26:39 | |
and the only medieval thing in sight was the owner. | 0:26:39 | 0:26:42 | |
Not that happy, then. Who cares? | 0:26:42 | 0:26:44 | |
-I am! -Me too! | 0:26:44 | 0:26:47 | |
Well of course you are, you've got your very own Romeo. | 0:26:47 | 0:26:49 | |
Actually, it's Taylor. | 0:26:49 | 0:26:51 | |
Watch out, world. Things are never going to be the same again. | 0:26:51 | 0:26:54 | |
The Jenkster's finally got a boyfriend! | 0:26:54 | 0:26:56 | |
I've got a boyfriend! | 0:26:56 | 0:26:58 | |
I've got a boyfriend. | 0:26:58 | 0:27:00 | |
I've got a boyfriend! I've got a boyfriend! I've... | 0:27:00 | 0:27:02 |