Cocolocolistic Sadie J


Cocolocolistic

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0:57:500:57:57

One second!

0:58:010:58:02

Did she just do the finger waggle at me?

0:58:020:58:05

Dedes, this is major-tastically important!

0:58:050:58:08

Not as important as this.

0:58:080:58:10

-I'm studying talking therapy on the i-Shrink app.

-Because?

0:58:100:58:13

Because you said I needed to work on my communication issues.

0:58:130:58:17

OK, guys, be honest. We'd make a really cute couple, wouldn't we?

0:58:170:58:20

The best. He'd totally love you.

0:58:210:58:24

-Never going to happen.

-Huh?

0:58:240:58:26

There's more chance you'll get hit by a bus that's been hit by a meteorite.

0:58:260:58:30

Even if you did meet him at a gig,

0:58:300:58:32

you'll have less than 7.4 seconds to impress him

0:58:320:58:35

on a crowd capacity of at least 66,000. It's a total no-go.

0:58:350:58:40

-Thanks, Dedes(!)

-You're welcome.

0:58:400:58:42

What better way to learn to communicate than become a therapist?

0:58:420:58:46

You get to talk to people all day.

0:58:460:58:49

Lie down!

0:58:490:58:50

Anything you'd like to talk about, Miss Jenkins?

0:58:520:58:56

Yuh-huh! This!

0:58:560:58:59

# Looking, looking, looking, looking

0:58:590:59:02

# And boy, what I see I'm liking... #

0:59:020:59:05

'That's right, girls.

0:59:050:59:07

'The Coco Locos will be choosing one of YOU to join them.

0:59:070:59:11

'So, what are you waiting for? Get Coco Loco-listic!'

0:59:110:59:15

Ouch. That actually hurt my eyes AND my ears.

0:59:160:59:19

Are you crazy?! The Coco Locos are...

0:59:190:59:22

Worryingly high-pitched, unnaturally symmetrical...

0:59:220:59:25

..the next big girl band.

0:59:250:59:27

Girls Aloud are, like, 100 these days, and personally,

0:59:270:59:30

I can't see the Saturdays making it past next Friday.

0:59:300:59:33

This is the girl band of the future, and I'm going to be part of it.

0:59:330:59:37

Puh-leeze! What makes someone as unstylish and tuneless as you

0:59:370:59:40

think you've got a chance against someone like moi?

0:59:400:59:43

She's got a point.

0:59:430:59:44

Did I just say that out loud?

0:59:440:59:47

I'll just go get us some shakes.

0:59:470:59:49

For your information, Whitney, I've got a secret weapon.

0:59:490:59:52

OK! As the Coco Locos' biggest fan,

0:59:520:59:55

I know exactly what they'll be looking for.

0:59:550:59:58

I'm thinking sparkly salopettes, box-step, box-step!

0:59:581:00:02

Maybe a fascinator,

1:00:021:00:03

clutching tight-tight, jazz hands, dazzling smile!

1:00:031:00:08

He's good, isn't he?

1:00:081:00:09

All right, here's the deal.

1:00:091:00:11

You choreograph and style me instead of her, and when I get the gig,

1:00:111:00:16

I'll take you on tour as my chief creative director.

1:00:161:00:19

-BOTH: I can't do that!

-Why? What's she giving you instead?

1:00:191:00:22

What exactly do I get for helping you get into the Coco Locos?

1:00:221:00:26

The chance to see your BFF become an S-T-A-R! Duh!

1:00:261:00:29

She's trying to buy you, which is so wrong,

1:00:291:00:33

-it's not about you, it's about me.

-As per usual.

1:00:331:00:36

So I just have to do whatever you want me to do, with nada in return?

1:00:361:00:40

-That's what friends do.

-BOTH: No, they don't! Jinx!

1:00:401:00:44

Quit with the cuteness!

1:00:441:00:46

He is NOT going to help you, and that's an order.

1:00:461:00:48

The Kitty Kat doesn't do "orders." ..Whitney, I accept.

1:00:481:00:52

Coolio, so when do we get started?

1:00:521:00:55

Mmm...Now o'clock!

1:00:551:00:57

Fine, whatevs! I don't need your help anyway!

1:00:581:01:02

I can get the gig on my own, thank you very much. You're not all that!

1:01:021:01:06

I'll just put the pan on and turn the heat up high

1:01:061:01:09

cos the Sass-ter is cooking on gas!

1:01:091:01:11

Honestly, I can't leave you alone for one second, can I?

1:01:111:01:16

# Won't somebody tell me why

1:01:181:01:20

# I'm always surrounded by boys

1:01:201:01:23

# Give me a break

1:01:231:01:26

# They got attitude, kind of cute

1:01:261:01:28

# But when they're in trouble

1:01:281:01:30

# Takes a girl to save the day

1:01:301:01:33

# I'd love another girl around the place

1:01:331:01:35

# To be her

1:01:351:01:37

# Someone to back me up so I'll always have the last word

1:01:371:01:41

# Guess it's hard to be the only girl

1:01:411:01:44

# In a boys' world

1:01:441:01:46

# Girl, girl in a boys' world

1:01:461:01:49

# I know I'm strong because

1:01:491:01:52

# I've got a positive mental attitude

1:01:521:01:54

# Understanding, kind of sensitive

1:01:541:01:56

# Don't want gratitude

1:01:561:01:58

# I just don't want to be

1:01:581:01:59

# The only girl

1:01:591:02:01

# In a boys' world. #

1:02:011:02:03

Oh! You been using that fly spray again?

1:02:061:02:09

No, this is Armed Combat, the new gentleman's aftershave.

1:02:091:02:13

It's certainly waging war on my nostrils.

1:02:131:02:15

Got to make an effort, haven't I? Hannah's on her way over.

1:02:151:02:18

You like this girl, then, eh?

1:02:181:02:20

-She's no girl.

-Funny name for a bloke.

1:02:201:02:23

She's an academic doing a proper degree in history and everything.

1:02:231:02:26

Boxy, Spanner and Donkey are well jealous.

1:02:261:02:29

I'm the first one to date an intellectual.

1:02:291:02:31

I never thought I'd see the day when you'd go out with a girl

1:02:311:02:34

-because she was brainy.

-She's also insanely hot.

1:02:341:02:37

And he's back. So, tell me, if she's insanely hot and intelligent,

1:02:371:02:41

what's she doing with you?

1:02:411:02:43

That's bang out of order, that is, boss. I'm well offended, I am.

1:02:431:02:47

I told her I'd done a history degree, too.

1:02:471:02:50

-What?

-No biggie, I mean, how hard can it be?

1:02:501:02:53

Hiya. Sorry, not interrupting, am I?

1:02:541:02:57

As if. Hannah, Steve.

1:02:571:02:59

-Steve, Hannah.

-Hiya! Is that a Welsh lilt you've got there?

1:02:591:03:03

Guilty. I moved here from Trefil near Tredegar.

1:03:031:03:06

Oh, Treddy!

1:03:061:03:08

Err, yeah, anyway, she's at uni up here. ..Good day?

1:03:081:03:11

Fascinating. We're studying the British Empire at the moment.

1:03:111:03:15

Didn't that blow your mind?

1:03:151:03:17

Oh, yeah! I loved that module.

1:03:171:03:20

-Oh!

-Can you believe we gave modern America so much?

1:03:201:03:23

Politics, economics...

1:03:231:03:24

Simon Cowell?

1:03:241:03:26

Joke! Ha-ha!

1:03:271:03:29

Go on, admit it. I am smart, aren't I?

1:03:291:03:31

You'll have to start calling me Brains from now on.

1:03:311:03:35

-Game controllers?

-Check.

1:03:421:03:44

-All gamers present and correct?

-Check.

1:03:441:03:46

-BOTH: Imogen!

-What are you doing here?

1:03:461:03:49

I live here, dummy! Well, not "here" here.

1:03:491:03:53

We've bought a house in the next street.

1:03:531:03:55

In fact, my lounge faces this treehouse.

1:03:551:03:58

Great. We'll give you a wave when you go back there. Bye.

1:03:581:04:02

You won't be able to do that. You won't be here.

1:04:021:04:05

Are you deliberately trying to confuse me, cos it's working!

1:04:051:04:09

Don't be a silly billy, Jakey baby! I meant the treehouse won't be here.

1:04:091:04:14

It's blocking our light so unfortunately,

1:04:141:04:17

my dad's had to apply to the council and get it chopped down.

1:04:171:04:20

Good luck with that.

1:04:201:04:21

It takes forever to get anything done by the council.

1:04:211:04:24

They've agreed. You've got 48 hours

1:04:241:04:27

before the chainsaw hits the chestnut.

1:04:271:04:31

-She's making it up.

-Nuh-uh! This is for real!

1:04:311:04:35

BOTH: No!

1:04:361:04:38

You can hang out in my luxury new Wendy House

1:04:381:04:40

I'm having built instead.

1:04:401:04:42

Not you.

1:04:431:04:45

Who needs the Kitty Kat as creative director,

1:04:481:04:51

when you've got the A-Sass-inator? I'll be my own stylist

1:04:511:04:54

-slash choreographer slash...

-Enough with the slashing, already!

1:04:541:04:58

Oops. Sorry. You know when I get anxious I get scissorhands.

1:04:581:05:02

Interesting.

1:05:021:05:04

What are you up to?

1:05:041:05:05

Nothing. Just some psychological profiling on my i-Shrink app.

1:05:051:05:09

-And who are you profiling?

-You. Duh!

1:05:091:05:12

Relax. The more I know about you, the easier it'll be for me

1:05:121:05:15

to communicate with you.

1:05:151:05:17

Well, communicate with the hand, sister,

1:05:171:05:20

because the A-Sass-inator's got work to do.

1:05:201:05:23

# Looking, looking, looking, looking

1:05:231:05:26

# And, boy, what I see I'm liking

1:05:261:05:28

# You've got me so excited

1:05:281:05:30

# Once again, I'm thinking, oh-oh... #

1:05:301:05:33

So, what do you reckon?

1:05:331:05:35

-One moment.

-A disco disaster!

1:05:351:05:38

Look, I'm a nifty little mover myself, and I've got to say,

1:05:381:05:41

I've got more chance of getting in that band.

1:05:411:05:43

Dad, these are my dreams you're shattering here!

1:05:431:05:47

But if you can dance, don't stand there. Help me!

1:05:471:05:49

MUSIC: "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" by Wham

1:05:551:05:58

OMG! This is a total-istic pile-up!

1:06:091:06:11

There's only one thing I can possibly do.

1:06:111:06:14

-Give up?

-Nuh-uh!

1:06:141:06:16

Hey, Kit Kat! Nice neckerchief, that is totally cowboy-tastic.

1:06:161:06:21

Good news, boyfriend.

1:06:211:06:22

I've decided you can be my chief creative director after all. Yay!

1:06:221:06:26

You can dump Dung-breath and help me get into the Coco Locos.

1:06:261:06:29

High five, bestie!

1:06:291:06:30

I thought you didn't need my help, bestie,

1:06:301:06:32

and that I'm not all that anyway, bestie!

1:06:321:06:35

He heard me say that? Oh, curse my big mouth. ..That is so not true!

1:06:351:06:39

-Then why did you say it?

-Butt out, Dung-breath.

1:06:391:06:42

Don't be like that with her.

1:06:421:06:44

At least she didn't take me for granted all the time.

1:06:441:06:47

In fact, I feel properly appreciated by...

1:06:471:06:50

-BOTH: Kitney!

-Kitney?

1:06:501:06:52

It's a couple name like Brad and Angelina, Brangelina.

1:06:521:06:55

-Posh and Becks, Pecks.

-But that's stupid. You're not even a couple.

1:06:551:06:58

Oh, look, Kit, I didn't mean that. I just meant...erm...

1:06:581:07:02

We could be...Sitney!

1:07:021:07:04

How about I make you my chief executive creative director?

1:07:041:07:07

Forget it, Jenkster. I've already made him president

1:07:071:07:09

of creative direction for ALL the Coco Locos.

1:07:091:07:12

Like that's going to happen! That muppet'll believe anything.

1:07:121:07:15

OK, ladies. Places, please.

1:07:151:07:17

Let's go over our audition piece one more time.

1:07:171:07:20

Oh, my Gaga! That's it!

1:07:201:07:22

No-one takes advantage of my Kitty Kat...unless they're me, obviously.

1:07:221:07:27

MUSIC PLAYS

1:07:271:07:30

Oh! She tripped me!

1:07:351:07:38

Sass! Have you gone totally bonkalicious?

1:07:381:07:40

No! You have!

1:07:401:07:42

She's not going to give you anything if she gets into that band.

1:07:421:07:44

It's all lies!

1:07:441:07:46

You know how dedicated I am to Kitney!

1:07:461:07:51

Don't go there! My BFF's intelligent enough to know he's being duped!

1:07:511:07:55

You're right, Sass.

1:07:551:07:56

I certainly am, and I've been duped for far too long...by you!

1:07:561:07:59

You came here to deliberately wreck Whitney's routine,

1:07:591:08:03

just so you can have me all to yourself.

1:08:031:08:05

But I've got news for you, sister, nobody messes with my new sister.

1:08:051:08:10

This friendship is officially over. O-V-A-R!

1:08:101:08:14

Oh, my Lady Gaga! Kit's dumped me for that dung-breather!

1:08:191:08:22

I've got to show him what's really going on.

1:08:221:08:25

And if he happens to have an amazing outfit and routine then so be it.

1:08:251:08:29

Getting my friend back is the real deal,

1:08:291:08:31

but if I don't get into the Coco Locos it's a deal breaker,

1:08:311:08:34

-that's why I'm going to do both.

-And breathe.

1:08:341:08:37

So, Dedes, are you ready to show Kit the truth?

1:08:381:08:40

My i-Shrink app says the truth is only true

1:08:401:08:43

to whomever believes it to be, so you might be wrong.

1:08:431:08:46

You need to start downloading better apps, like Puking Pigs!

1:08:461:08:50

Are you using this as an excuse not to communicate?

1:08:501:08:53

What? I'm just trying to get this whole "dialogue channel" open!

1:08:531:08:56

-Don't do that!

-Is there an element of jealousy at play here

1:08:561:09:00

when you think of Whitney's hold over Kit?

1:09:001:09:01

Of course there's jealousy at play! It's playing all over town.

1:09:011:09:04

-Sold out!

-Wow, I'm getting good at this whole communication lark.

1:09:041:09:08

Dedes, focus! I just lost one of my bestest BFFs here!

1:09:081:09:12

I've got to show him that Whitney's making a muppet out of him.

1:09:121:09:15

-She's the bad guy here, not me!

-OK, I'm hearing you.

1:09:151:09:18

But there's one slight problem.

1:09:181:09:20

They're rehearsing in the Cheer Ups' hut.

1:09:201:09:22

They're not going to let you in there. Not after your last visit.

1:09:221:09:24

Already on it!

1:09:241:09:26

Give me a Y, give me an E, give me a Y-E-S! What does that spell?

1:09:291:09:33

Disaster! This is THE stupidest idea you have ever come up with!

1:09:331:09:38

99% of studies show that...

1:09:381:09:40

Those new communication skills are really working out for you.

1:09:401:09:43

What I meant was that this brings a lot of barriers into focus for me...

1:09:431:09:47

Save it, Dedes. You're coming.

1:09:471:09:50

-Boss, I need a name.

-I can think of a few for you right now.

1:09:591:10:03

That fat bloke, lots of wives.

1:10:031:10:04

That's no way to talk about Mr Johnson.

1:10:041:10:06

-He's one of our best customers!

-Not him. The king.

1:10:061:10:09

Harold the 10th, Howard the 5th...

1:10:091:10:12

-Henry the 8th!

-Brilliant!

1:10:121:10:15

Keith, why d'you disappear like that?

1:10:161:10:19

Oh, Steve-o was calling me. Needed a bit of help with this little beauty.

1:10:191:10:22

-You were saying, your favourite king is...?

-Henry VIII, obvs!

-Really?

1:10:241:10:29

I think he's a bit dull.

1:10:291:10:31

-Well, his eight wives...

-Six.

-..six wives didn't think so!

1:10:311:10:35

Debatable.

1:10:351:10:36

Got to dash. Lecture's in five. Call me, OK?

1:10:361:10:40

I am dying to get your thoughts on the Victorians.

1:10:401:10:43

-They're not a band, are they?

-No.

1:10:461:10:49

-This is a disaster.

-Not as easy as you thought, all this history?

1:10:501:10:53

I thought I could bluff it, but I know nothing.

1:10:531:10:56

You've got to give me a crash course.

1:10:561:10:58

-I don't think me and Hannah are going to last.

-You can't be that clueless.

1:10:581:11:02

Once you've got the two World Wars...

1:11:021:11:05

There were two? Who won?

1:11:051:11:06

Crash course it is.

1:11:081:11:09

Testing, testing, one-two-three. Testing...ooh!

1:11:121:11:16

What are you doing?!

1:11:161:11:18

Prepping my secret Dictaphone, duh! I'm going to need some hard evidence

1:11:181:11:22

if I want to out Whitney as a fraudster.

1:11:221:11:24

OMG, they're coming! Get down.

1:11:241:11:26

Nuh-uh! My i-Shrink app recommends total commitment

1:11:261:11:30

once a client has decided on a plan of action.

1:11:301:11:33

Hey, Kitney!

1:11:331:11:34

Nice pom-poms! Is that a new hat?

1:11:341:11:39

Mais oui, bien sur!

1:11:391:11:41

What? I spend 70% of my time with you guys,

1:11:431:11:46

and you don't think I know anything?!

1:11:461:11:48

Actually, 69.3%, but who's counting?

1:11:501:11:54

-And she's back.

-Do we know you?

1:11:541:11:56

Umm...yeah, I'm Katie, and this here's my girl Bebe!

1:11:561:12:02

We met at the cheerleading cheer-off last spring.

1:12:021:12:07

-We're thinking of joining your team!

-The Cha-Cha Cheerleaders, were you?

1:12:071:12:11

Y-yes?

1:12:111:12:13

Oh, wow! You were amazing that day!

1:12:131:12:16

That backflip star jump you did, it was off the hook!

1:12:161:12:20

Thanks.

1:12:201:12:21

So, who was that uber-cool guy you were with earlier?

1:12:251:12:28

-Kit-Kat? He is so not cool!

-That's interesting.

1:12:281:12:32

I thought he was your creative director,

1:12:321:12:34

you were going to take him on tour and all.

1:12:341:12:36

-You didn't know who he was a minute ago.

-Lucky guess?

1:12:361:12:40

-So, anyway, about Kit Karter...

-Oh, enough about Kit!

1:12:401:12:43

I'm only using him to get in the Coco Locos, all right?

1:12:431:12:46

-He's really not that interesting.

-Go on.

1:12:461:12:48

Actually, I think it's about time we put you and Bebe through your paces.

1:12:501:12:56

Come on, girls, let's do the pyramid move! You can do the triple flip!

1:12:561:13:00

No, I...

1:13:001:13:01

I'll take your bag, don't worry.

1:13:011:13:03

My bag, she's got my bag!

1:13:031:13:05

DRUM ROLL

1:13:051:13:08

BOTH: A-a-agh!

1:13:121:13:14

Well, at least we got what we came for!

1:13:201:13:24

I did not come for whiplash!

1:13:241:13:27

-Man, this stinks!

-Leaving the treehouse?

1:13:281:13:31

I was actually talking about this.

1:13:311:13:34

You're right. Leaving the treehouse stinks, too.

1:13:341:13:38

-We've come a long way.

-We've had success.

1:13:381:13:40

-We've had good times.

-But remember this...

1:13:401:13:43

BOTH: # Never forget where you're coming from

1:13:431:13:47

# Never pretend that it's all real

1:13:471:13:52

# Some day soon this will all be someone else's dream

1:13:521:14:00

# This will be someone else's... #

1:14:001:14:03

Hrr-hmm! When you've quite finished wandering down Memory Lame,

1:14:031:14:08

maybe you'd like to check out my luxury Wendy House.

1:14:081:14:11

-No way!

-I wasn't talking to you.

1:14:111:14:13

-Jakey-baby?

-I'm OK.

1:14:131:14:16

-It's got a 43-inch plasma screen TV with surround sound.

-Big deal.

1:14:161:14:20

-And built-in gaming technology.

-Wow! I mean...whatever!

1:14:201:14:25

-Two dedicated gaming chairs.

-JAKE GASPS

1:14:251:14:28

And the latest Ninja Warlord video game.

1:14:281:14:30

BOTH: Assassins of the Shogun Temple?!

1:14:301:14:32

I said the latest. Ninja Warlord, Army of Doom.

1:14:321:14:35

Assassins is, like, so three weeks ago!

1:14:351:14:38

Take me to the Wendy House!

1:14:381:14:40

No, what about us? The treehouse!

1:14:401:14:42

# Never forget where... #

1:14:421:14:46

I forgot. Let's go.

1:14:461:14:48

Fine, go! I don't need you, you traitor! Turncoat! Deserter!

1:14:481:14:53

-Nobody's listening to me now, are they?

-No.

1:14:531:14:57

Hey, Kit. Can I have a word?

1:15:021:15:05

Ex-friend. That's a word!

1:15:051:15:07

Technically that's two words.

1:15:071:15:09

But who's counting?

1:15:091:15:11

Kit, this is serious.

1:15:111:15:13

I'm not coaching you for your Coco Locos audition, Sass.

1:15:131:15:16

Backstabbers don't cut it with the Kitty Kat.

1:15:161:15:19

Then stop coaching her! She's so backstabby

1:15:191:15:22

she gives backstabbers a bad name!

1:15:221:15:23

Oh!

1:15:231:15:25

What in the name of Nicki Minaj is going on?!

1:15:251:15:28

-'Who was that uber-cool guy you were with earlier?

-Kit Kat?

1:15:301:15:34

'I thought he was your director, you were going to take him on tour?

1:15:341:15:38

'Oh, he is! And he's definitely coming on tour.

1:15:381:15:41

'I don't reckon he'll stay for long.

1:15:411:15:43

'Not when Gaga and Britney discover him. He's going to be huge.'

1:15:431:15:47

That's not what she said. I swear!

1:15:481:15:51

Save it, sister. Don't add lying to your list of Coco Loco crimes.

1:15:511:15:55

Dedes, you believe me, don't you?

1:15:581:16:00

Well, I didn't hear Whitney say what you said she said,

1:16:001:16:04

but the iShrink app says...

1:16:041:16:05

Enough with the iBonkers stuff!

1:16:051:16:07

Good communication is about peeps,

1:16:071:16:09

not apps. Get with the programme, Dede, and not the one on your phone.

1:16:091:16:13

What have you got to say about that?

1:16:131:16:15

I just...

1:16:151:16:17

-Why is nobody on my side?! ..Thanks, Ms V.

-What for?

1:16:171:16:21

I just come for the money for the shakes.

1:16:211:16:23

Do you think they grow on schnoodle trees?!

1:16:231:16:26

Oy!

1:16:261:16:28

You look like I feel.

1:16:451:16:47

You don't look so hot yourself.

1:16:471:16:49

-Why are you in such a funk?

-No reason. You?

-No reason.

1:16:511:16:55

BOTH: OK, you twisted my arm. Sorry. You first.

1:16:551:17:01

Me first. Whitney's turned Kit and Dedes against me.

1:17:011:17:03

She's going to win a place in the Coco Locos.

1:17:031:17:06

Imogen's getting the treehouse cut down and stealing Jake, too!

1:17:061:17:11

BOTH: I hate that!

1:17:111:17:13

-What are you going to do about it?

-Nothing.

-You?

1:17:131:17:17

-Same.

-BOTH: Are you crazy?!

1:17:171:17:19

Jenksters don't take stuff lying down.

1:17:191:17:22

Exactly. When a Jenkster hits the wall, they knock it down.

1:17:221:17:25

-What are you waiting for?! Go get her.

-You go get her.

1:17:251:17:28

I'm just going to brush my hair.

1:17:321:17:34

-I take it things aren't going well with Hannah.

-How did you guess?

1:17:361:17:40

You're trying to get your leg in the arm of those overalls.

1:17:401:17:45

-The history lesson didn't pay off?

-It paid off.

1:17:451:17:48

I talked about 1066 and the Charge Of The Bright Brigade.

1:17:481:17:51

It's...near enough.

1:17:511:17:54

Then I thought Winston Churchill was that dog off the telly.

1:17:541:17:58

Exactly, I totally thought it was game over.

1:17:581:18:01

Then Hannah turns round and says she thinks I'm cute

1:18:011:18:04

and funny for trying to impress her. Now she likes me even more.

1:18:041:18:08

So let me get this straight.

1:18:081:18:11

You have found a beautiful, intelligent girl,

1:18:111:18:14

who actually likes you for being you.

1:18:141:18:17

I know. Unbelievable.

1:18:171:18:20

-So what are you going to do about it?

-Dump her, obviously.

1:18:201:18:23

I've fallen for her mate, Charlotte.

1:18:231:18:25

She's doing a PhD in astrophysics.

1:18:251:18:28

Any idea what that is?

1:18:281:18:30

LAUGHTER

1:18:301:18:32

Order, order.

1:18:371:18:38

GAVEL BANGS

1:18:381:18:39

So, there is only one audition space left

1:18:391:18:42

for the Coco Locos.

1:18:421:18:45

Do we have any takers?

1:18:451:18:47

Here!

1:18:471:18:49

Excuse me. Thanks.

1:18:491:18:52

-Where do I sign?

-There and there.

1:18:521:18:55

This is the health and safety disclaimer.

1:18:551:18:57

-Basically, if you break anything, you're on your own.

-Oh!

1:18:571:19:01

-I'm getting used to that.

-OK, the rules are simple.

1:19:011:19:05

All competitors must dance at the same time on the dancefloor.

1:19:051:19:10

If one of the Coco Locos gives you a tapsky on the shoulder,

1:19:101:19:13

you must leave the dancefloor immediately.

1:19:131:19:16

The last person bopping

1:19:161:19:18

wins.

1:19:181:19:20

SHE SINGS

1:19:201:19:22

Go get boogylicious!

1:19:251:19:28

Tres luck, mon cherie.

1:19:291:19:32

Dedes, Dedes, look,

1:19:341:19:37

I'm really sorry, OK?

1:19:371:19:38

I know you're major-tastically angry with me, and you should be.

1:19:381:19:41

But I am 100%, categorically, make-no-mistake

1:19:411:19:44

going to prove to you I'm in the right and Whitney's wrong.

1:19:441:19:47

-How?

-Take her down with a shak-a-lack-a-shake.

1:19:471:19:50

Do anything to her, you can kiss goodbye your friendship

1:19:501:19:52

with Kit for ever. If she IS stringing him along,

1:19:521:19:56

-she won't need him once she wins...

-Of course, she must win!

1:19:561:19:59

Brilliant, Dedes. Now that was some good communication right there.

1:19:591:20:03

But that wasn't what I was... Actually, just go with it!

1:20:031:20:06

This better be good, Jenkins.

1:20:071:20:10

We're in the middle of Ninja Warlord Army Of Doom when you called.

1:20:101:20:14

-What? This old thing?

-Where d'you get that from?

-My dad.

1:20:141:20:17

He also got me the latest, latest one

1:20:171:20:20

Ninja Warlord Streets Of Fiery Doom.

1:20:201:20:25

-And assassins!

-Awesome!

-I've never heard of it.

-Wow, nerd alert.

1:20:251:20:30

How out of touch are you?

1:20:301:20:31

Who cares? You don't have a 43-inch plasma screen to play it on.

1:20:311:20:36

-45, right there.

-He's got a point.

1:20:361:20:40

-And where are your dedicated gaming chairs?

-Here.

1:20:401:20:44

-Every time there's a blast I make it judder myself.

-Whatevs.

1:20:441:20:47

The point is, you have to share this room with everyone.

1:20:471:20:51

You think this family's going to want you in here gaming all day?

1:20:511:20:54

Just admit it. I win, because you won't have a treehouse,

1:20:541:20:58

as of this afternoon when that tree gets the chop.

1:20:581:21:00

That tree can't get the chop. Got a tree protection order on it.

1:21:001:21:04

Too old. Too important.

1:21:041:21:06

Yes!

1:21:061:21:08

No!

1:21:081:21:09

Deputy Fastplay or Ninja Warlords Streets Of Fiery Doom AND Assassins?

1:21:101:21:15

Oh, yeah, I may have told a little white lie.

1:21:151:21:19

-The lie being...

-It does not exist.

1:21:191:21:22

# Never forget where you've come here from. #

1:21:271:21:32

Come on!

1:21:321:21:33

It's time to go Coco-Loco-listic!

1:21:371:21:42

CHEERING

1:21:421:21:43

Good luck, everyone.

1:21:471:21:49

OK. Here goes nothing.

1:21:491:21:51

Look it doesn't matter how hard you try.

1:21:511:21:54

-I'll still win.

-That's the idea.

1:21:541:21:56

# And, boy, what I'm seeing

1:21:561:21:58

# You've got me so excited

1:21:581:22:00

# Hearts soar and I'm thinking oh-oh... #

1:22:001:22:02

Oh!

1:22:041:22:06

CRASH

1:22:051:22:06

BELL RINGS

1:22:081:22:10

# You got me crazy loco

1:22:111:22:14

# You got me crazy loco. #

1:22:141:22:18

BELL RINGS

1:22:181:22:19

# You got me crazy loco

1:22:191:22:22

# You got me crazy loco. #

1:22:221:22:25

BELL RINGS

1:22:251:22:26

What in the name of Ksha?

1:22:271:22:29

LAUGHTER

1:22:291:22:31

Finally(!)

1:22:341:22:35

There is clearly only one winner here...Whitney Landon.

1:22:371:22:43

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:22:431:22:46

Thank you so much, everyone.

1:22:491:22:52

This is amazing.

1:22:521:22:54

And I never would have been able to do it

1:22:541:22:57

without one very special person...

1:22:571:23:02

..me!

1:23:021:23:04

But Whit-Whit, what about your chief creative director?

1:23:041:23:08

I made you the star you are. Couldn't even conga before me.

1:23:081:23:12

-Thought kaftan was a cup of coffee.

-Whatevs.

1:23:121:23:15

Couldn't creatively direct his way out of a paper bag.

1:23:151:23:18

THEY GASP

1:23:181:23:19

How big a doofus am I? I actually trusted her.

1:23:231:23:26

I'm sorry, Kit Kat.

1:23:261:23:27

I didn't want to say, "I told you so", so I showed you so.

1:23:271:23:30

I knew if she won she'd can Kitney.

1:23:301:23:32

-OMLG. You did not throw the contest from me?

-Too right!

1:23:331:23:36

That's what BFFs do. Friends again?

1:23:361:23:39

ALL: Yeah.

1:23:391:23:40

And so, I am delighted to announce

1:23:441:23:49

appearing here, with the Coco Locos,

1:23:491:23:53

Whitney Landon, for one night only.

1:23:531:23:59

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:23:591:24:02

You mean I went through all of this, for one night?

1:24:021:24:06

You can stuff your Cocos.

1:24:061:24:08

So, by process of elimination,

1:24:091:24:14

the winner is Sadie J!

1:24:141:24:17

No way can I accept this!

1:24:191:24:21

Not after lying, cheating and tickling my way to the final.

1:24:211:24:25

Who am I kidding? Come on, girls, let's rock!

1:24:251:24:28

# You're sitting there

1:24:491:24:51

# Looking good

1:24:511:24:53

# Don't think I haven't noticed

1:24:531:24:54

# You know I would. #

1:24:541:24:57

I so wish I still had that iShrink app.

1:24:571:25:00

-But why?

-'Cause I don't know which is more psychologically damaging -

1:25:001:25:04

watching Sadie make a total goon of herself

1:25:041:25:06

or watching the Coco Locos watch Sadie make a total goon of herself.

1:25:061:25:11

LOUD THUD

1:25:111:25:12

ALL: Ooh!

1:25:121:25:14

She's won, by a mile!

1:25:141:25:16

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