The Spark Is Gone Sidekick

# We are Splitsboro kids and we go to Sidekick School

# Learning to be second best while playing by the rules

# Maxum Man is missing

# Now we rule the school

# Flying, smashing, bashing, stomping, looking super cool

# I'm a sidekick, sidekick that's the life for me

# Half-sized superzeros with full-sized super dreams

# Sidekick, sidekick What an awesome gig!

# Just like superheroes

# Just like superzeros

# But only half as big

# Sidekick! #

ALL: Wow! Awesome!

Students, you know all those difficult sidekick lessons

I've put you through?

Most of them were for my amusement.

But some of them were to prepare you for...

-..shadow a super day!

-THE CLASS CHEERS

You will spend the day with a hero

from the League of Amazing Super Entities Ring.

LASER, for short.

These are your pairings.

ALL: Whoa.

Vana, we got Uni-Cyclops!

Whoa, whoa.

I see you got - ha-ha - Static Clint!

VANA LAUGHS

Hey, he's a real hero. Sort of.

Anyway, he's way better than

some one-eyed, unicycle-riding, er...

..rider.

I'll have you know that Uni-Cyclops

is the third-best one-eyed

unicycle-riding superhero ever.

Yeah? Well, Static Clint is...

He's the biggest, he's the best...

-Kitty?

-According to the official Splitsboro Hero Rankings,

Static Clint is the ninth-best static-based hero. Sorry, Eric.

-We got hosed, dude.

-Huh.

I hope you're ready for some super-duper supering, ladies.

I'm more ready than anyone's ever been. High-five!

CRASH!

Sorry. Little trouble with the old depth perception. Let's roll!

So, what's first, Mr Clint, Sir? Stop a crime? Rescue someone?

Oh, stop someone from committing a rescue crime?

How's a little tour of LASER headquarters sound?

Only like the greatest day ever!

Um, what you doing?

Just charging up the old super batteries.

Hang on.

THEY SCREAM

Welcome to the Hall of Fairness,

the world's greatest hand-shaped hall.

I have a sweet bachelor pad in the thumb.

So many touchy touchables.

We might have gotten stuck with a lame hero, but this is awesome.

-Wicked!

-Wait, don't touch anything.

I'm never allowed to touch anything.

Wait a minute, you think I'm lame?

Sorry, Clint, it's just, ninth best?

Even Trevor's ranked as seventh-best doofus.

I got a certificate.

And a lolly.

Mmm.

Oh, yeah? Well, would a lame hero have one of these?

I call it the really big jet.

Man, this has got to be way better than whatever

the girls are doing with old one-eye.

-Let's rub it in their faces.

-Yeah!

Hey, Vana, you're not going to believe the mega awesomeness that...

FIGHTING SOUNDS Wha...?

Sorry, Eric, we can't chat right now.

Yeah, we're too busy capturing a real super villain!

That is so cool.

Man, we have got to get in on some of that super action.

Hey, don't you think the girls might need our help?

They looked like they were doing OK to me.

But, Trevor, if they need our help then we can fly over there

in the really cool jet. Get it?

No.

-Get in the jet, Trevor.

-Will do.

Oh, and just for future reference,

I never get it.

Hey, hold on there. We could get into trouble.

Come on, Clint, how are you ever going to become a real superhero

if you don't break a few rules?

-Just don't touch anything.

-Sure thing!

-GLASS SHATTERS

-I'm going to get in so much trouble.

STATIC CLINT SPLUTTERS

Hi, guys. You missed it.

We captured Brute Brutal.

It was so amazing!

Nice landing, by the way(!)

Hey, he's never even flown the jet before,

so, you know, he did reasonably well.

Enjoy your shift, Clint.

OK, see you...later.

What did Uni-Cyclops mean by "shift"?

As a lower rank hero, I provide security here at Megamatraz.

It's the only super duty Team Laser trusts me with.

-We're going to sit in a jail?

-We didn't come here to sit.

-That's what school is for.

-Relax, it's a dream job.

Security is totally automated.

Time for me to catch up on my super napping.

-See you in eight hours.

-HE SNORES

What are we going to do for eight hours?

THEY SNIGGER

CLINT SNORES

CRASH!

BOTH: We didn't do anything!

THEY WHISTLE INNOCENTLY

Panic has set in as the escaped villains

have begun stealing everything from everyone everywhere.

Aah!

Static Clint,

you are hereby stripped of your LASER membership

and banished forever from the Hall of Fairness.

Now, pack your things and get out.

What am I going to do? I'm a ninth-ranked hero and there's no...

You just dropped to number 12.

Sorry, Eric.

-12?!

-HE SOBS

I'm 12?

Er, I guess you could come stay with me and Maxum Brain.

Really?

-Really?

-It's the least we can do.

The least we can do is nothing.

-Remember that.

-This is the best idea ever.

Ow!

This is the worst idea ever.

I would not have believed it had I not seen it.

He is actually a bigger sloppy do nothing than you.

Ow! That does it.

Either he goes or I go.

Call me when you've taken out the super trash.

Can I have a glass of water?

Really? You can't get that yourself?

You're right, the 12th-best anything doesn't deserve water.

Ohh.

Here.

Ah!

Yeah, so, er, any thoughts about when you're going to, you know,

do something?

We'll talk about it tomorrow.

Just try not to fry anything else.

Ahh!

I know him being fired was our fault, but come on.

He's supposed to be a superhero, not a...you.

Hey, I'm a 7, he's a 12.

We have to get him back on Team Laser and off my couch.

Hey, look, those girls we know are on TV.

In a brazen act of brazenness, the escaped villains have taken

Team Laser and two sidekicks hostage in the League headquarters.

-They've captured Vana!

-And Kitty.

Oh, and Kitty. Right, don't want to forget Kitty.

We have to save them.

No, Clint has to save them.

-Yeah...I guess.

-Don't you get it?

If you save them, they'll have to let you back on the team.

You really think so?

No, we won't let you back on the team, even if you rescue us.

Good call, Mayor.

We don't need rescuing by the 'do nothing duo' or old sparky.

Burn!

Hi, Eric!

Well, I tried. I'm not a super.

I can't even give rescues away.

-Back to the couch.

-No.

No more couch and no more excuses.

Listen, you are a superhero, a 12th-ranked superhero,

but you're still a hero.

I would give anything to have superpowers.

You've got to save them.

I never could resist a mildly inspiring speech.

Look out, world, Static Clint is back

and I vow that I will be number nine again.

-Yeah!

-Woohoo!

CLANG! The villains put up a force field.

No, we did.

We really don't like Clint.

CLINT GASPS

Sir, I may not be a member of Team Laser anymore,

but I'm still a hero.

Zero is more like it.

Low-five, anyone?

Get ready to be rescued. Boys.

Trevor, he needs more firepower.

-So, what am I supposed to do about it?

-Trevor!

Fine, whatever.

Hey, look what I found.

All right!

Three...

Two...

OK.

One!

And...fire, fire, fire!

WEAPONS EXPLODE

FORCE FIELD SHATTERS

THEY ALL CHEER

RUMBLING

BUILDINGS SHATTER

Uh-oh.

That's it, Clint.

For destroying the Hall of Fairness

and letting the villains escape again,

you are hereby even more stripped of your LASER membership.

However, because you rescued two innocent Sidekicks,

your super ranking has moved up to... Kitty?

Number nine! Good going, Eric.

Whoa!

-Clint! Congratulations. You did...OK.

-OK?

Did you say I did OK? Did you hear that?

The third-best one-eyed

unicycle-riding superhero said I did OK.

She sure did.

She?!