Four's a Crowd Sidekick


Four's a Crowd

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# We are Splitsboro kids and we go to Sidekick School

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# Learning to be second best while playing by the rules

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# Maxum Man is missing Now we rule the school

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# Flying, smashing, bashing stuff and looking super cool

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# I'm a sidekick, sidekick - that's the life for me

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# Half-sized super zeros with full-sized super dreams

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# Sidekick, sidekick What an awesome gig!

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-# Just like superheroes

-Just like superzeros

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# But only half as big! Sidekick! #

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COUGHING

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Wow. Who would have figured using Maxum Man's superweapon

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for a wienie roast would've led to such destruction?

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Yeah.

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-SHOUTING:

-My ears are still ringing!

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-We probably woke up everyone in town!

-Er...

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I don't think that's a problem.

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WIND WHISTLES

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According to Maxum Brain's useless and destroyed body,

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Splitboro is deserted. Except for us!

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Oh, well. At least he didn't suffer...much.

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I'm going to find out what happened. Anyone want to help?

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-I'm down.

-GURGLING

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But, er, give me a minute, OK? Cos that hot dog is not sitting well.

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Maybe there's some info in here.

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Congratulations. If you're seeing this, you survived the apocalypse!

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It is I, Maxum Man! Today's lesson, super security measures.

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Um, Maxum Man, where's MY safety suit?

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Don't worry, my agitated chum - you don't need a suit at all.

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Ah...

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Not where you're going!

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Waah!

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Every hero worth his super name has an apocalypse evacuation system

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in case of a giant meteor, an earthquake,

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or a wienie roast that's gotten out of hand.

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Wa-ha-ha-ha! Waah!

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Waah! Wah wah!

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This dimensional portal sucks the helpless townspeople

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out of harm's way.

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A-a-ah!

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The townsfolk wait quietly until evil is vanquished

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and they can safely return to Earth.

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Hi, Golly Gee Kid!

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-Help meeee!

-You're welcome!

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Our nuclear wienie roast must've tripped the evacuation system.

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Everyone's in a parallel dimension!

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So, it's just us here?

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No teachers, no Dad...

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No anyone to tell us anything?

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BOTH: Yay!

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BOTH: We have complete and utter control of the entire town!

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Guys. Don't you think we should be figuring out

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how to bring the townspeople back and...

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BOTH: He-he-he-he!

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Great. Now we're alone AND we have to make sure those two

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don't destroy the entire town.

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LAUGHING

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Yeah-ey!

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Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

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Grrr-ah!

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-Aah!

-Ha-haha!

-Ah-ha-ha! Yes! Unsupervised super-laser tag!

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-BOTH:

-Ah!

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Uh, I thought we were stopping them from destroying the city?

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We were but, hello, getting shot with lasers is fun!

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-But I guess we'll do things your way. The boring Kitty way.

-Oh.

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Whatevs.

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Bla-ha-ha-ha!

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Ah-ha-ha-ha!

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Missed me! You are just the worst laser shooter ever.

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Maybe we should try to rescue the town?

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You know, before the guys remember the super hovertank factory?

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BOTH: Super hovertank factory?!

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-Ugh.

-Ugh!

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Now, to do what any young boy

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in control of a super neutron plasma laser hovertank should do.

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Eric, stop!

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You can't carve your face into the school!

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Even though it would make it way cuter.

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HORN BLARES

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-Dude, what's the hold up?

-Enough destroying stuff!

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Stop being such dorks and let's get this town back to normal!

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Well, excu-u-se me. But this dork is taking his laser cannon and leaving.

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-Come on, Trevor.

-I still want to destroy the school.

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-Forget it, we'll destroy something else.

-You're not the boss of me!

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Hey, with everyone gone, no-one is!

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You only took that tank because I did it first. Do whatever you want.

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-I will.

-You do that.

-I am.

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-Good. I'm so tired of them.

-But what about the town?

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-SHOUTING:

-We have to save the town!

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You know what, I'm tired of you, too.

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It's "the town this", and "the town that". What about me, Kitty?

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Since this catastrophe started, have you ever once thought about me?!

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-SHOUTING:

-Sometimes, Kitty, you are so selfish!

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Giving me orders. Copying everything I do.

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I'm sick of having other people around.

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SCREECH!

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The Laser Hall Of Fairness.

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TRUMPET FANFARE

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Bet there's some cool stuff in there. Cool stuff that Trevor won't have.

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No-one will mind if I borrow a few things.

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Since there's no-one around, that is. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haa!

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Hm-mm. Never noticed that before.

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Not only has everyone disappeared,

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but an evil secret lab has been transported to my house.

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Which, for some reason, has Xox's costume, weapons,

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and a draft copy of his autobiography.

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"Thinking Out Of The Xox - Love, Learning, And Evil."

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And since...

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-CAT SCREECHES

-..Xox isn't here,

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he won't mind if I borrow a few things.

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Mwah-ha-ha-ha!

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Hello? Anybody here?

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Oh! Oh, my! I...I look amazing!

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This is Vana Glama, good evening, Splitsboro.

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I'm sure no-one will mind if I borrow a few things.

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Ha-haha-haha-ha!

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SHE CRIES

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All I wanted was to rescue the townspeople

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from that other dimension!

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Ooh, nice superconductor.

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They ignored me like a punk.

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Wow, a microcircuit matrix destabiliser!

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I'm sure no-one will mind if I borrow a few things.

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Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

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Splitsboro, have no fear -

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Super Awesome Cool Look At Me Eric is here!

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Sweet name.

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Ooh! That's good levitation.

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Hey, what are you doing wearing Xox's stuff?

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You're not the only one that can 'borrow' cool stuff.

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Why don't you just find your own thing to do? I'M the superhero.

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I have found my own thing... I'm the supervillain! Ha-ha!

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Live, from downtown abandoned Splitsboro, I'm Vana Glama!

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Channel Three, Five, Seven... Don't bother flipping, I'm everywhere!

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Uh, Vana, just about to have a superhero/supervillain face-off here.

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Do you mind? I'm in the middle of a broadcast.

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Yes, I do mind.

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Cue battle music!

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Ah!

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BOTH: Gah!

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How about a little traffic update?

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BOTH: A-a-a-ah!

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CRASH! BOTH: Huh?

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Bet it's hard to ignore me now, huh?!

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Ha-haha-haha-haha-ha!

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-Did you hear something?

-Not me.

-Now, where were we?

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Oh, right, superbattle to the death.

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Hi-yah!

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Ar-rr-rr-gh!

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-Hey!

-I control all the power in this town now!

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Every computer, circuit or machine!

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Ah. Now, as I was saying...

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Argh!

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Super Awesome Cool Look At Me Eric can handle this.

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Hey, I'm the super here!

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Grr-ah!

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What are you doing?! Get off me!

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Rargh-argh-argh!

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Hey, I'm the only hero here!

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No! I am!

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Ha-haha-ha!

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Think again.

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Nyaaah!

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Gaaargh!

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Aah!

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OK.

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-Little too far?

-Yeah, a little too far.

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Maybe having no supervision wasn't the best thing for us after all.

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Shouldn't we be trying to rescue the townspeople?

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Oh, yeah. Kind of feels like a Kitty thing.

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-You really dropped the ball there.

-But...but...

-I am very disappointed.

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-But...but...

-Yeah. Nice going, Kitty.

-I'm sorry.

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I can probably build something to get everyone back.

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-I should think so, after your terrible behaviour.

-Done.

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Ahem.

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Sorry. Again.

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-TOWNSPEOPLE:

-Hooray!

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HE GASPS

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Ah! Vot happened to ze town?! It's completely destroyed!

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Who did this?

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We didn't do it.

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Oh, right. Hah-hah.

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-ALL:

-Waa-aa-aa-aa-h!

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Two weeks banishment in the alternate dimension.

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Guess we learnt our lesson.

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I know I did. I really need adult supervision.

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-Who knew?

-But...aren't we all alone here in this dimension?

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He-he-he-he.

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-Let's fight!

-OK!

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-Get your ear out of my foot!

-You smell.

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-You stink, and that's worse.

-Eww.

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