Graduation Daze Sidekick


Graduation Daze

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# We are Splitsboro kids and we go to Sidekick School

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# Learning to be second best while playing by the rules

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# Maxum Man is missing

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# Now we rule the school

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# Flying, smashing, bashing, stomping, looking super cool

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# I'm a sidekick, sidekick

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# That's the life for me

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# Half-sized super zeros with full-sized super dreams

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# Sidekick, sidekick

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# What an awesome gig!

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# Just like superheroes

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# Just like superzeros

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-# But only half as big!

-Sidekick! #

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Students and...others,

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this week, some of you will graduate to become full-fledged sidekicks.

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-ALL: Yay!

-Silence!

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I said "SOME of you".

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Others will be held back for yet another year of sidekick training...

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Eugene.

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But for those of you who earn your sidekick diploma at graduation,

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I have one last word of important, life-saving advice.

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SCHOOL BELL RINGS

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Meh, you'll figure it out.

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Yay!

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Graduat...

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Ow!

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-Yay!

-Woo-hoo!

-Yay!

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Argh!

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Yay!

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No more school! No more...

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When I said some of you will be becoming full-fledged sidekicks,

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I didn't mean you, Needles.

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Is this because of all the cheating?

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-Nein.

-The class napping?

-Nein.

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The never showering?

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Nein! Ew.

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This is because you are this year's recipient of...

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the Maxum Man Super Scholarship!

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Scholarship? But I barely passed.

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True, there were more qualified candidates, namely...all of them,

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but thanks to a generous donation from Maxum Corp,

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you will attend Super University.

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Roll film.

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Congratulations, Insert Student Name, and get ready

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for the best time of your until-now pathetic sidekicking life.

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Welcome to Super University!

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At Super University, you'll study to be a real superhero

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with classes in super posing, super punning...

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Hey, Clint. Shocked to see me?

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Heh-heh.

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And, of course, our par-tay.

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FUNKY HEROIC MUSIC PLAYS

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Ooh! Ah-ah!

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Mm-mm!

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See you around campus, Insert Student Name.

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I'm going to Super University?

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I'm going to be a...

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Super?! You?!

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YOU?!!

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Super orientation starts tomorrow.

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Hey, how come you didn't get a scholarship?

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You deserve it way more than I do.

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SHE SCREAMS

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At least I have Pinata Eric to remember you by.

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I'll...miss...you...so...much!

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That's so amazing, Eric!

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Wouldn't it be so funny if I just held on to you

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so you had to take me with you?

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Gulp!

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Cock-a-doodle-doo!

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Rise and shine, Mr University.

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I made your favourite.

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Bacon pancakes?

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Bacon waffles?

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Scrambled bacon on bacon with a side order of bacon bacon?

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And a freshly squeezed bacon.

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BELL TOLLS, SOBBING

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Ah! I could get used to this!

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Don't get too used to it.

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Today you move to your new dorm room in Laser Headquarters.

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I didn't realise university meant

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giving up the only home I've ever known.

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Other than the orphanage.

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And the box they found me in.

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WOMAN GASPS

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HE GURGLES

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PARP!

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Oh, boxy! I'm going to miss you most of all.

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And you too, Brain.

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Oh, that is sweet.

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Hyah!

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Aaagh!

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HE GROANS

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What's up? What's your major? Want to start a super study group?

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Race you to the...

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Maxum Mutt? You're...

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You're not ripping me to shreds.

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He can smell the Maxum on you, kid.

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-Right, Melvin?

-Mom, it's Mel now!

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Ha-ha!

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Now show Eric the suit.

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Eric Needles, from this day forth,

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you will be known as Maxum Eric!

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Whoa!

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Why don't you take it for a test flight, son?

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You mean I can fly?

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With that suit you can do anything Maxum Man can do.

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Just take it easy at first.

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CLANG!

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GROANS: This is going to be awesome!

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ALARM BELL RINGS

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Ha-ha-ha!

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Not so fast, villains!

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There's a new soon-to-be-super in town - Maxum Eric!

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PARP!

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Mmm, chilli dog!

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PEOPLE CHEER

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We love you, Maxum Eric!

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Grr!

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Uh-oh.

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Ah-ha-ha!

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Ha-ha! Skidmarks!

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SHE SCREAMS

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Worry not, citizens.

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Maxum Eric is here!

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All right, meteor, Maxum Heat Vision go!

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Not X-ray vision! Heat! Heat!

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Aaaah!

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CRASH!

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CAR ALARM BLARES

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ERIC GROANS

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Hey, I wonder what Vana is up to.

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Maxum X-ray Vision go!

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Heat Ray Vision, X-ray Vision - this hero stuff is kind of tricky.

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VANA SCREAMS

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What? Another meteor?

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And it's huge!

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OK, really giant meteor, this time I'm sticking to the basics.

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Good old Maxum Strength.

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Ha! I did it! I...

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Um, where's the moon?

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I just destroyed the moon, didn't I?

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And the final pick in the sidekick draft goes to, um...

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Um, who are you?

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Not Evile Guy!

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And I pick Trevor Troublemeyer to be my sidekick.

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HE SNORES

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What?

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And now I take down the supers from the inside.

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HE CACKLES

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Sweet! Let's take 'em down!

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What? Oh, you heard that?

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Hey, guys. Sorry I'm...

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Give the kid some room.

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-Ow!

-Argh!

-Ah!

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Thanks, Maxum Mom. Sorry I'm late.

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I got held up on a super, uh...

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-glueing-the-moon-back-together mission.

-That sounds so exciting!

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Being a soon-to-be-super is exciting and all, but it's pretty hard, too.

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I kind of thought supering would be, I don't know...easier.

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Still better than being a sidekick. Am I right?

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Yeah! It's way better...

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HE SIGHS

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Students, faculty, graduation marks the moment that

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you officially become sidekicks.

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Or, in Eric's case, something far, far, far better!

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HE GURGLES

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But until each of you have your diploma...

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you are still mine!

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And as per tradition, I have one final test for you.

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RUMBLING

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THEY GASP

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IT ROARS

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Meet Robo Dragon!

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IT BELLOWS

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ASSORTED PARPING

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Retrieve your diploma from Robo Dragon, and you graduate.

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Fail, and you must start Sidekick School all over again.

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Any questions?

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No more questions! Go!

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Hyaah!

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Hey, Eric! I'm a marshmallow!

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BATTLE CRY

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Get in there, kiddo, and grab your diploma!

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IT GROWLS

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All right, Robo Dragon,

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you may be a virtually indestructible mechanical monster

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and I may have just peed my pants,

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but that diploma is mine!

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Hoo-hoo!

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CRASHING

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IT ROARS

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THEY GASP

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Eric!

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SHE SOBS

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-ALL:

-Yay!

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Eric! Eric! Eric!

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Woo-hoo! We all get to graduate!

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Yay!

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All righty, now to find which one is my diploma.

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Maxum X-ray Vision, go!

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Um, oops.

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Oh, come on!

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Once again, Eric has snatched defeat from the jaws of victory.

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It's back to Sidekick School for everyone!

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HE GROANS

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Uh-oh.

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It was an accident! An accident!

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PUNCHING

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Oh, no!

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