Episode 8 Splatalot

-It's splat time, folks!

-Yes, welcome to Splatalot,

the magical, mythical kingdom where 10 brave young warriors

go head to head with those deplorable defenders

as they compete to capture the treasured Splatalot crown!

This was my mother's idea!

Can the attackers overthrow the defenders

in their magisterial quest to reign supreme?

Or will the defenders repel them

with their arsenal of slime-based weaponry?

So who will tumble? Who will tilt? Who will teeter?

-And who will go...

-BOTH: Splat?!

-Hello, I'm Dick, he's Dom.

-And this is Splatalot, but what is Splatalot?

Is it a place? Is it an idea?

Is it a message to the world telling us to overcome our fears,

to confront every challenge that life throws at us

and to follow our dreams?

Hmm?

Or is it... "three rounds of splatty fun"?

"That's it, stop over-thinking everything, now shut up!

"P.S. We need more milk."

Right, um, let's have a look

at those three rounds of splatty fun, then, shall we?

In Round One,

all ten attackers are challenged to cross the merciless moat.

The sixth fastest will then attempt to ditch the dungeon, but only

the top four will reach the final, where the Splatalot crown awaits.

-Ah, very well put.

-Thank you! So much better than, er,

"three rounds of splatty fun," don't you think?

Here's the first round in more detail.

The moat challenge gets off to a flying start as

-the splatterball hurls the attackers into the moat.

-Splatty fun.

Then they climb the slippery slope and cross the rolling mace.

-More splatty fun!

-Then it's down the incline, over the battleaxes,

across the bridge of disaster onto the debilitating disc

and past the finish line.

-Even more...

-Splatty fun! Yes, I think we get the picture.

It's just, sometimes, you think too much.

-Splatalot isn't an idea, it's a...

-HONK!

-..rolled up in a...

-RIP!

-..with a hint of...

-Hee-hee! Get off!

Exactly! And then, there's this lot. They're enough to make you...

LOUD PARP!

Yes, it's the defenders! They have one task - to stop the attackers

at all costs and, in Round One, that task goes to...

-Vane!

-The bow-less archer with an appetite,

Thorne, the thoughtless thug with a silly haircut,

and Faetal, the venomous Viking.

-Who ordered the pain cakes?

-Actually, I think I did.

Out on the course, Thorne's ready with the slime stick,

Faetal has the aqualizer and Vane's with the splatzooka!

So let's meet our first attacker Kyra!

Defenders, catch me if you can!

I'm sure they'll try.

Wow! All-star athlete Kyra is really off to a flying start!

-Ah, you mean like this?

-No, I don't! You've turned her into Batgirl!

You know, when I run track, Kyra, I just knock the hurdles over,

it's way easier!

Blubber-houses! Blubber-houses!

On your mark, get set...

Bro!

Ooh, and Kyra comes a cropper!

Well, to be honest, I think it was a false start and she pays for it

-with a trip to the moat.

-Kyra at the incline, she makes a small step

-and chipping sod-berries!

-Yes, that was a small step too far for Kyra.

She loses her footing and goes from Batgirl to SPLAT-girl!

I once made it the Olympics for competitive napping.

I missed my competitive napping thing, cos I slept through it.

-I was training.

-I feel like a nap after that!

He's also sending Kyra to sleep!

Well, at least she had a nice comfy water bed to fall on to.

Here's a wake-up call from Faetal!

All that running, Kyra, it may be time for a water break!

Kyra decides to run away, but the sprinter some becomes a splatter!

She looks like she's a professional at track and splat!

-Hmm, I prefer your line.

-Thank you, dear!

-Kyra leaps and she just about makes her landing!

-Did you see that?

And Kyra finishes with a time of 6:11!

My name is Mr Gorbachev

and tear down this castle!

Mr Gorbachev is obsessed with his hair and his real name's Tristin!

Yo, Tristin, how do you like MY hair, dude?!

Fun-sy!

Wow, where did that lot come from? Tristin couldn't move

-for paint balls!

-Tristin tiptoes across the mace,

but he falls into the moat!

So our tongue-twisting top tip of the day is,

"Don't tiptoe, Tristin, or you'll slip and trip."

At the axes now! Bug-head!

Well, Tristin might want to check his hair after that splat!

-I think he's going for the wet look!

-BOTH: Ooh!

Now what we're doing right now is a light rinse

just to make sure we get all the slime out.

Faetal tries to give Tristin a complete makeover!

But Tristin prefers a hair-raising splat in the moat instead.

-A great time, though.

-Looking good, Tristin,

now for some hair gel. What do you think, Faetal?

He looks great.

I didn't know there was water involved!

I hope Mandy's teasing us!

Boo-ya!

I really like environmentally-conscious girls.

That's awesome, here's some green balls.

Vane shouldn't joke about the environment.

To be fair, he wasn't very funny.

-Ooh, a rainbow! Is that a good look?

-Seemingly not.

Well, there's no gold at the end of the one for Mandy! Just moat water!

See that rope ladder you're climbing right there? All organic.

Yes, but what's the impossible incline made from?

-Itchy-ka-wa!

-Itchy-ka-wa?!

Well, strictly speaking, 75% itchy-ka-wa, 25% polyester.

-It looks like she's trying to save the dolphins!

-But who'll save Mandy?

-9:47 might not be good enough!

-Here's Marco!

-Remember the Alamo!

-The famous battle in Texas in 1836?

-Nice one!

-I heard that you're Frexican - is that French and Mexican?

-Yeah!

That's awesome, dude!

Yes, but he's also half slippy, half slidey and 100% splatty!

Mmm, the perfect ingredients! Just add water!

Hmm, I'm not sure you'd want to include

the contents of the moat in any recipe.

This guy is all feeling but no tackle.

But Marco's found the recipe for success

-with the fastest time so far.

-That extra topping's for free.

Ahh! Just kidding!

-Is she just acting?

-Apparently, she can sing, dance and act.

Well, now she can splat too!

Hey, Bianca, I heard you're pretty talented.

You know, Vane's pretty talented too.

# Figaro! Figaro! Splat-aro! #

Thank you, Vane. Please leave your name in the bin on your way out.

# Mor-mio! #

-And the crowd goes wild.

-But what does Bianca make of it all?

Cap-ya-shone!

Yes, well, I think that can only be described as the very opposite

of a standing ovation.

Bianca, Bianca?

Wherefore art thou, Bianca?

-Great, everybody's getting in on the act now.

-Can Bianca stay focused?

-She's slipping and soo-gee-how-ah!

-Well, it's hard to concentrate

when you're being upstaged by inferior talent.

-Believe me, darling, I should know.

-Oi!

But in the end, she puts in a fine performance.

Brava, Bianca, brava!

-So, at the halfway stage, here's... What's up with you?

-Nothing.

-Good.

Here's the leaderboard.

Mandy is in the danger zone.

Now, we have five more attackers to come

and six in total going through to Round Two,

so whoever's in the lead at the halfway point is automatically safe.

-And that's Marco, with a time of...

-You called me inferior talent!

Oi! Come... How unprofessional! Huh?!

Well, if the next five attackers can provide as much drama

as Mr Grumby-numbles, we'll be in for an Oscar-winning round.

Hey! Where are you? Come on, that was just a little joke!

Plea... Oh, forget it!

Right, so five more attackers are about to attempt the...

PARP!

..moat challenge.

They know the times they have to beat, but the first half

included some fast rounds, so... What are you doing?!

Oh, er, me and my inferior talents are upstaging you, cos, apparently,

-that's all they're good for!

-OK, so maybe I was a little bit harsh!

OK... OK, just this once, I'll forgive you.

-Aw, thank you, dear!

-That's all right.

Here's a reminder of the leaderboard.

The over-friendly Faetal, the vacant Vane

and the prickly Thorne are ready, so let's meet Jacob.

I like cheese! Woooo!

If he's like that with cheese, this course will send him crackers!

Actually, I think it's just going to send him into the moat a lot.

At the mace now.

-Poodle!

-Oh, dude! Head shot!

I'm sorry, but I can't condone Vane's celebratory moment there.

-The attackers aren't just pieces of meat.

-Would you call that rare,

-medium or well done?

-You're not helping!

You've got to be kidding me!

Oh, now, here's a clever way to avoid being splatted on the incline.

Yes, but he may have forgotten this is against the clock.

-Oh, dear, he's still doing it at the bridge.

-Give him a chance!

I think this could work, cos you'd get round this course more quickly

-if you don't fall in.

-Like that you mean?

Ah! So, with 12:13, Jacob's approach didn't quite work.

Princess of the Castle!

But you need to be Queen!

Are you ever in the mood for just a plain mayo sandwich?

-Is all you ever think about food?

-Yes! Totally!

I can 100% admit to that. What's your name?

I don't know, Turkey Sandwich. Sounds like that.

-It's Thorne!

-Oh, Thorne, yeah, that's right.

I love how the defenders always come up with such stimulating

-topics of conversation!

-Princess Natasha doesn't seem to agree.

-She prefers the company of the won ton.

-And, courtesy

of the majestical mace, her Royal Highness reaches new depths.

To splat or not to splat?

That, Natasha, is the question.

Who do you think you are - William Splats-spear?!

More tragic nonsense from the defenders,

but that time of 5:40 is far from tragic!

One small step for man.

One giant splat for mankind!

How fitting as we launch Iarin into orbit!

And here she is re-entering the Earth's splat-mosphere.

Iarin, what's the origin of Iarin? Is it pirate or what? Ye-arr!

-Arr!

-Once again, I cannot condone Vane's ignorant oafishness.

Well, it's pretty much the only thing he's good at.

Looks like Iarin's pretty good at moat landings.

Well, she did promise us "one small splat for man".

Yes, but will she be able to deliver that "giant splat for mankind"?

Jam-fun! Yes, she can!

Houston, we have blast off! Our intrepid Iarin is

sent rocketing once more into the dark side of the moat.

And Iarin's voyage into outer splat finishes in 5:52.

For the splats!

-Apparently, Jordan is the master of sarcasm.

-Of course he is(!)

-Hey, maybe YOU'RE the master!

-Are you being sarcastic?

-No!

-Thorne, I have a bone to pick with you.

-Yes, my dear?

You need to stop mixing your laundry in with mine.

-How embarrassing!

-They're not mine!

Yes, they are. This is the third time this week!

Well, after that "brief" interlude, here's Jordan on...

Sorry, off the bridge and into the diggle!

How will he deal with the debilitating disc?

That's how!

Yes, but he doesn't fall in and that will save him some valuable time.

Not a problem for Jordan as that is the second-fastest round today!

-Let's goo him anyway!

-Here's our final attacker Robbie!

-This is my mother's idea!

-Brilliant battle cry!

-FEMALE VOICE:

-Robert, don't worry about what the other attackers say.

You're my son and I love ya!

-Why is Vane being so cruel to the attackers today?

-It's his job!

Well, crossing the mace was too tough a job for Robbie!

To be fair, most of the attackers have struggled on it.

-Yeah, the mace is on a roll today.

-Oh, please!

My Robert's going to be a competitive diver!

-You suck!

-Oh, he's so dramatic!

Now, will Robbie pay for that backchat?

-Swing!

-Ooh, right in the keister!

See, never talk back to your mum!

But Vane ISN'T his mum, is he?

Chuck-a-ree!

Well, backchat leads to thwack splat!

Robbie's just about to make his move on the axe

and the water burst takes him by surprise. Top splatting!

On the disc now. Not for long!

So you splattered, so you didn't do so well. Who cares, Robbie?

Despite all that mothering, Robbie's through.

-That's my Robert!

-Let's check out the leaderboard.

Our six fastest attackers are...

And what's their reward for such an achievement?

All the choc chip ice cream they can eat?

Staying up late on a school night? Wearing the same socks for a month?

No, not exactly! They'll be splattered heavily

while sliding continually into the murky depths of the castle dungeon.

Oh, right, so no choc chip, then?

So, before we head for Round Two,

what have you made of the defenders' performances so far?

Well, performance is the word.

We had Vane trying to sing opera and Faetal acting all Shakespearean.

-Yeah, in their own, er, sweet way, of course.

-Ahem!

# Figaro! Faetalo! Faetalo! #

Romeo, Romeo? Wherefore art thou, Romeo?

I so totally hate being kept waiting!

But soft, bro? What light's like from yonder window breaks, dude?

She's like a triple burger with cheese and Juliet is the mayo!

-CHEERING

-Thank you.

-Thank you.

Oh, flowers! Thank you very much.

OK, dudes, let's crank up the action... Ahem!

..and remind ourselves who's going through to Round Two.

We have Bianca, Marco, Tristin, Robbie, Jordan and Natasha.

And they're about to Ditch The Dungeon,

so let's see what that means in more detail.

You know, you can, er, take that off now.

OK, so the attackers begin by escaping from the stock market,

crossing the slippery splat walk and climbing the loathsome ladder.

At the very top, they will find four flags.

If they can claim one, then they're through to the final.

Of course, the defenders will be slowing them down at all times

with their slime machines. "But which defenders?" I hear you ask.

Did... Did I? Sorry, did I really? I was miles away.

I wish you were. Here's the bad guys.

-First up, it's the cunning cavalier comedian.

-Kookaburra.

-He has a funny line for every occasion.

-Unlike our next defender,

Skabb, who, shall we say, is a man of few words.

Finally, Madeva, who, for once, gives us the silent treatment.

Skabb rule 211!

-When...

-you...

-fly...

-do...

-not...

-look down on the ground.

Well, the funny guy really delivered there.

So the attackers are down in the dungeon.

Bianca's in red and blue, Marco's in orange,

Robbie's in yellow and green, Natasha's in pink,

Jordan's in green and Tristin's in yellow.

The defenders are also in position,

so I think it's time to get this round underway.

-KLAXON

-And they're off!

They slip out of the stocks and head for the gate.

Oh, but the gate's putting up some resistance.

Just needed the right touch from Bianca.

Not now, I'm disinfecting the course! Give me five minutes, OK?

It's reassuring, though, that Kookaburra's so hygienic.

But his idea of a spotless course is one with no attackers on it.

And then, you wouldn't have spectacular pile-ups like that.

Yes, it started with Tristin and expanded into a quadruple splat!

Marco...Polo!

Ooh! So Marco and Skabb have now been formally introduced.

In Skabb's world, that's the same as a handshake.

SHE SQUEALS

-Pardon?

-Know what I mean?

What was that?

No men?

-I said, "Know what I mean," you know what I mean?

-No man!

No man!

None of you men can come up here, it's just women.

-Is that what she meant?

-Who knows?

-That's discriminatory!

-Right, back to the game, perhaps.

Clatter!

Natasha slimed by Skabb this time, progress is slow for the attackers.

Ooh, and Kook dislodges Tristin!

He loses his balance and bumps into an unlucky Jordan on his way down.

Skabb rule number 433 -

-when life gives you lemons, throw them at people.

-What lemons, Skabb?

-This is a lemon.

-I'm not going to argue with him.

Ooh! It's another direct Skabb splat!

You know, sometimes it's hard to work out who's attacking

and who's defending.

Just so we're clear, the ones going uphill are the attackers.

But what if they go downhill? What do we call them then?

-We could call them a taxi.

-Eugh!

Look at them just taking each other out!

Yes, a little slip leads to a bigger slide, a massive collide and pile

-of hurt pride.

-We'll need another taxi if you keep that poetry up.

-Ka-shee-wa!

-Tristin once again takes the main splat, but he takes out

-four others with him!

-Plus Bianca gets Marco's foot in her face.

SHE SQUEALS

Madeva splats Marco! And the winner of the moat challenge

-slides the full length of the splat walk!

-Know what I mean?

Ah! Everyone, everyone, stop being mean! No mean!

-Kook still doesn't get Madeva.

-Nor do I.

Ta-you-ka! Robbie slides all the way back down!

I wonder what his mum would think!

Oh, he's so dramatic!

-Rubber plague!

-Skabb releases the bubonic balls

and Robbie is once more on the receiving end! Melon head!

Well, they used to say, if you got the plague,

then you went downhill fast.

Oh, hang on, what's Tristin up to?

He's holding onto Marco, is that allowed?

Skabb takes aim and splats him!

he slips, then slides into Bianca and then Natasha,

so hanging onto Marco didn't exactly pay off!

In fact, Marco could turn out to be the winner,

but Skabb fends him off and, well, you know the rest.

Yes, but I never tire of seeing it.

-Each splat is as unique as a newborn snowflake.

-Amazing.

-Thank you.

Not you, look! Skabb's disappeared and there's no-one to stop Tristin!

Pull him down! Pull him down!

Too late, Thorne, Tristin and Marco have both made it over.

Tristin wins by a small margin, but they're both in the final!

Meanwhile, the other attackers are slipping, sliding and struggling.

Tristin and Marco can celebrate, but who will be joining them?

Two flags still remain.

Natasha makes a move, but Robbie is sprinting! Look at him go!

He's now level with her!

But he slips and that allows Natasha to finish in third place!

One place remains and Robbie and Bianca are both grappling for it!

They've both slipped and down they go all the way back to the moat!

And that leaves the door well and truly open for Jordan,

who claims the final place!

But as one door opens, another one shuts,

this time on Robbie and Bianca.

Hey, Madeva, great defending, know what I mean?

Yeah! Ha-ha!

Things are still a little lost in translation between Kook and Madeva.

But the winning smiles on these guys' faces are easy to interpret.

Yes, our triumphant finalists

who will soon be competing for the Splatalot crown are...

-What a great round that was!

-Yeah, the attackers did well,

but the defenders were all over the place.

Skabb disappeared at the end and what about all that nonsense

with Madeva and Kookaburra? I can't understand them.

To be fair, there are lots of things

-you can't understand.

-True.

-Here is what's coming up.

Yes, all any of us need understand is that our four finalists

are about to get splatting of their lives

in their quest to rule the kingdom!

-Splat-stat-attack?

-Yes, please, but can I do it?

-Tell you what, we'll share it.

-All right.

Natasha only just qualified in the moat challenge,

but improved slightly in Round Two.

-DICK'S VOICE:

-Conversely, Jordan started well with a second-place

in Round One, but finished last in ditch the dungeon.

Tristin has performed well so far with a third and first position.

-DICK'S VOICE:

-But Marco is the tournament favourite, winning

the moat challenge and coming a very close second in Round Two.

It's funny, it just doesn't sound like me when I've got it on!

Sounded fine to me. Here's a reminder of today's finalists.

-Our tournament favourite.

-Our princess who would be Queen.

-He's here for the splats.

-And Mr Gorbachev.

Otherwise known as Marco, Natasha, Jordan and Tristin.

And here's trouble, otherwise known as the dastardly defenders.

All six of them are on duty in the Splatalot final.

Which looks like this. We start with a trip through the dire mire.

Then a leap across the terrifying Ts, which leads to

the scary-go-round, but beware the wrecking ball we call the Splacken.

The attackers must land on the gruesome twosome

and get past the clobbering cannons.

It's then a walk down the royal ramps and leap onto the rock wall.

And at the top is the prize - that all-important Splatalot crown!

The attackers are ready and raring to go.

Skabb and Faetal are on slime duty, Thorne has the vaporiser,

Kook's on the aqualizer and Medava and Vane

-are on a break, by the look of it.

-KLAXON

And they're off, so Marco's in orange, Jordan's in green,

Natasha's in pink and Tristin's in yellow and everybody's in the mire.

Jordan is first to clear the barrier.

-Marco's not too far behind, though.

-What's this? Jordan has stopped

to help the others over, allowing Marco to take the lead.

He's first at the terrifying Ts.

-Hi, Marco.

-Marco decides to take measured and steady steps.

But bargey!

Measured and steady soon becomes unmeasured and splatty!

Look at this! The attackers are showing the defenders

-how to get along.

-Easy, Skabb!

-That's harsh, how do you hit a girl?

-A girl?

-That wasn't a girl!

-'Uh-oh!'

-Faetal is a lady!

-Thank you.

-Well saved, Skabb.

-Jordan at the Ts, over one, over two...

Over and out!

If we look this again, we can see that Jordan falls in the moat.

Amazing commentary, how do you do it?

It just comes naturally, like falling off a log

or, in Marco's case, tripping on a T.

And if you don't land on your feet, you have to do it all over again.

-Natasha goes for the slow, steady, nice and gentle approach.

-Oh!

Nothing slow and steady about that splat.

There she was minding her own business and,

before she could say "power shower", she was taking a bath in the moat.

A bath in the moat? Believe me, she won't come out cleaner.

And I can't explain it,

but there's something about the way you splat tonight.

Thorne, sometimes you just take my breath away.

Can Tristin do the same by crossing the Ts?

Yes, he can, even with just one shoe!

Marco lands safely on the scary-go-round

-and manages to avoid the Splacken!

-Why is it called the Splacken?

-Because it's a cross between a splat on a chicken!

-That makes no sense.

Tristin also makes his landing.

He and Marco are opening up a bit of a lead now.

Don't rule out Natasha, she's crossed the Ts.

Can you feel the splats tonight?

Thorne using the lyrics of Elton John to confuse

and bewilder the attackers and it's working.

Yeah, maybe Marco's not a fan of Sir Elton

or, more likely, he can't stand Thorne's delivery.

Either way, he can't get to grips with the gruesome twosome.

Tristin's at the annihilating arm and holds on tight.

Natasha's on the scary-go-round, but she needs to act fast,

-because here comes the Splacken!

-She manages to avoid it easily.

Tristin, however, doesn't avoid a splat in the yakky-soba!

And Natasha takes over where Tristin left off!

Back to Jordan at the Ts.

He leaps and slips, but oh, can he save himself?

-No.

-And, just like Tristin, Jordan is trying to finish the course

-with only one shoe.

-No easy feat.

-Marco at the clobbering cannons.

Have they clobbered him? Yes? No!

Natasha's still on the arm, but here comes Tristin.

This could be awkward! It is! Tristin bumbles and tumbles!

He started at the bottom and worked his way down!

Has any of this affected Natasha?

Yes, it has, she joins Tristin in the moat!

Aff-puddle!

Don't give Vane too much credit,

he was standing right next to poor old Marco.

Jordan's catching up with the others now.

Hey, Frexican, one flap and you're on your back, champ!

Oh, beluga!

Well, tournament favourite Marco might well be leading by example,

but he's certainly splatting by example too.

Jordan's over the arm, but he's overbalanced too and down he goes!

Hey, let me wash that guacamole off!

Now, can Mark go make it onto the royal ramps this time?

Yes, he can! He's getting closer to the prize!

Can the other attackers catch him up?

Tristin's nearest, but he's all the way back at the arm.

He has another go, a good grip, but he'll need it.

-Yes, Skabb and Faetal are slamming him at close range.

-Back to Marco.

He leaps and lands on the rock wall.

What's Tristin's response to that? Oh, he goes for a splat in the moat.

-Perhaps not the best response.

-What is it with him and Natasha?

Once again, they end up in exactly the wrong place

-at precisely the wrong time.

-Back to Marco.

-Someone stop him!

-You can hear the desperation in Kook's voice.

He knows it might be too late. Marco is so close to finishing now.

-Slow down, dude!

-No, no!

I will splat upside your head!

Well, they can scream and shout all they like,

but the defenders have lost, Marco has beaten the competition

and conquered the course, making him the new king of Splatalot!

Fantastic(!)

Marco is a very happy chappie, but the defenders look deflated.

They should learn from the other attackers, such good sports.

-That's right, Skabb!

-Let go of me, Faetal!

-No!

You cannot take down the Frexican?!

Yes, Skabb, there's a new boss in town and his name is Marco!

Er, His Royal Splatness King Macro of Splatalot,

-to give him his full title.

-Sorry, Your Splatness.

-Mm-hm.

What a worthy winner he was, although I have to say,

the defenders were, once again, the architects of their own downfall.

Yeah, but we like a good downfall,

especially if it's a downfall into the moat.

As we shall now demonstrate with our Splat Of The Day.

And that honour goes to Natasha on the terrifying Ts,

with this breathtaking, thirst quenching, water blasting,

body drenching, moat churner of a splat.

-Say that again three times quickly.

-OK, that again three times quickly.

Moving on, time to discuss King Marco's journey to the crown.

In the first rounds, he established himself as the favourite.

And in the final, he fulfilled his potential to the max.

You can't take down the Frexican?!

So, pray silence please for our new ruler - King Marco.

My first act of King of Splatalot

is to have one of you thrown into the moat.

I wish it was all of you, but today, it's going to be...

-Vane!

-Well, it really could've been any one of them today.

Maybe it was his bad mum impressions or his bad opera singing

-or his bad food stories or his bad...

-Yeah, you're right.

Good choice, Your Royal Splatness King Marco of Splatalot.

Well, it's been another top-quality Splatravaganza.

Yes, we're off to re-slime the splatzookas,

so we'll leave you with the Splata-pult ceremony.

Take it away, Vane!

-Whoa!

-That's all for now, splat fans, so until next time...

BOTH: Keep splatting!

How's my hair?!

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd