Becky vs Bocky Strange Hill High


Becky vs Bocky

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# Creepy ain't the word Freaky ain't the word

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# Sneaky ain't the word See, what I've observed

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# Is there's no easy way to describe this geeky place

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# Even geeky place doesn't tell you what I need to say

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# This is Strange Hill

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# Where a talking frog can eat your face

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# It's very, very random You'll get used to these debates

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# If you stick around Although I wouldn't recommend it

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# When they used the name Strange Mate, they really meant it

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# There's some things in life with which you just don't mess

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# On every vest I've got the letters SOS

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# Cos you never know what might be lurking round the corner

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# And what they might do if they ever found or saw ya

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# Keep the lights on in the hallways all day

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# Things won't always tend to go your way

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# Watch your back and be prepared

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# Can't wait for 3.30 See you there. #

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BELL RINGS

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'And lastly, it's time for school elections.

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'You'll have all week to campaign, then this Friday...'

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BUZZING, SILENCE

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C'mon, Gennie. You can do it.

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All ye need is a bit a me tender, lovin' care.

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'As I was saying, the elections will be held this Fri...

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'Arghhh!'

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SNORING

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Oh, sorry, children.

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I fell asleep during that brief period of darkness.

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Now then, what were we on about?

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Uh, uh...

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Me.

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Yes, Miss Bethany.

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The school elections?

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I'd like to take this "oppunity" to announce my "candacy".

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Once again, I'll be running for school president.

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She does this every year.

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Her smug face plastered all over the school,

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then she does nothing except take advantage of her title.

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Um, I'd like to book a table for President Bethany.

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I wish just once, a candidate would run who actually

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cares about the cruddy state of this school.

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A candidate who speaks for us.

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You're speaking and you're us.

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You're right!

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Fellow students!

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I have something important to say and it can't wait!

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BUZZING

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Oh, I guess it can wait a bit.

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My friends, today I stand before this grand,

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but cruddy, generator to tell you this school needs new energy.

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And I'm not just talking about

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biodegradable, renewable, sustainable,

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alternative green solutions, I'm talking about ourselves.

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Have we become like this generator - rusty, broken down, slow,

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full of rats?

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Whooo! I was already going to vote for you, but woo-hoooo!

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If you kids are done, I've got to go back to fixin' Gennie here,

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but thanks for the free sit.

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Always nice to take a load off.

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Good luck in whatever the heck it is you're doing.

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So... What did you guys think?

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I'm pleased to see you supporting alternative energies.

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Personally, I favour bioelectrical solutions.

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This potato battery generates enough voltage to run my laptop.

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With enough butter and Bac-O bits, it can run for hours.

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Fantastic. Mitchell... Oh, what do you think?

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It was quite exciting

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when the generator looked like it was going to explode, but...

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But what?

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But, and this is a big but...

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MITCHELL AND TEMPLETON: Big Butt!

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Seriously, though, you're not going to win any

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votes by talking about rechewable, restrainable energies.

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Renewable, sustainable energies.

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Nobody cares. I don't want to be rude, but...

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-What? You love being rude.

-True.

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In which case, to be blunt, this is never going to get you elected.

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I don't understand.

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See? Now, that's more like it. Pow!

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But Stephanie's all look and no substance.

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This isn't a popularity contest.

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-Everything in school is.

-Except the popularity contest.

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That is a bit Stephanie-heavy.

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You need to fight, and become class president, and bring in a new

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generator and a two-day school week and a ban on homework!

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Who mentioned a two-day week and a ban on homework?

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Forget that right now. I believe in you.

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But how am I ever going to beat her?

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By using Templeton's Patent Potato-Powered Brainwashing Machine.

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It electro-programmes the wearer to agree with you. Observe.

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This is a terrible idea.

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ELECTRICAL BUZZING

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What a great idea!

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What a really terrible idea!

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The effect's not long enough.

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-We're going to need a bigger potato.

-Brainwashing's not ethical.

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No, but it is a quick and easy way to get people to do what you want.

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If you want to beat Stephanie without any dirty tricks,

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you're going to have to get out there and sell yourself.

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Ew! The idea of pictures of me all over the school.

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I quite like it myself.

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Today, we will make "portriss".

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ALL: What?!

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"Portriss!" Pictures and sculptures of persons!

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ALL: Ohhhhh. OK.

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Ve just need model.

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Becks, be the model!

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With the art show coming up, your face will be all over the school!

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I can't do that! I'm not nearly attractive enough.

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Look! You are the pinky-haired-est cutest girl I know.

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Really? D'ya mean it?

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Sure. (If it works.)

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Listen, Becks, sometimes you have to force yourself to do what you

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never in a million years would normally do.

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Like every morning when I get up for school.

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-Mr Kandinsky?

-Very good, Glasses Girl!

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You must capture vat is inside Glasses Girl.

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Not just outer beauty, but very essence, vat is inside Glasses Girl!

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You mean like her guts and stuff?

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If you wish, Big Boy! Art is freedom!

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With many rules.

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You crazy boy. Vat you call this fabulous mess?

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Clay Becky.

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Ah! Hmm-hmm!

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Soon the school will be full of fabulous Beckies!

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Becky will be everywhere!

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Oooohhh!

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Not if I have anything to do with it.

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Oh! Becky everywhere? We'll see about that.

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I've just had a brilliant idea.

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What does that feel like?

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We need to disable the new security cameras -

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but they say they're foolproof.

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Foolproof?

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-They didn't count on these fools.

-Exactly.

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They didn't say anything about the dumb old generator.

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Shouldn't that be down?

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Dumb generator! Give me something heavy.

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Give me your big, ugly, clunky shoe now.

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Politics does get a bit personal, don't it?

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HISSING AND CREAKING

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It's dark, ain't it?

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It's an undercover mission. Of course it's dark.

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Let's see those pictures.

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BOTH: Ew! Ew! Ew!

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Time for Becky's make-over.

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Let's do this.

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Tryin' on shoes now are we, Gennie?

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You're a strange old bird, you are.

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That should sort you out, my angel.

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-BOTH: Oh!

-Rumbled!

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Let's get out of here!

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Eugh!

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I feel like I'm about to enter a freak show.

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Huh, vote for the Amazing Annoying Girl!

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See the world's largest ego in action!

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Thrill to her inane remarks!

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Stand in stunned silence as her lackey, kisses her hideous behind!

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I'm voting for Becky, thank you.

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No, he meant... Oh, forget it.

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These halls won't be grim for long.

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Once we decorate them with all the pictures of Becky,

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people will gasp with joy.

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-Argh!

-A bit more joyful than that.

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They've destroyed me!

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I'm a blot! A smudge!

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A horrible ugly smear! SHE SOBS

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I think I know exactly who did this.

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Where's my sculpture?

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I'll never be president!

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All my great ideas.

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They'll just have to wait till I'm Prime Minister.

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I think you're the best!

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Agh! You're... You're...

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You. I mean, me.

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Agh! Don't hurt me!

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Why, you're even prettier than your pictures!

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You really think so?

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Oh, gosh, yes!

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I haven't been around that much,

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but I think it's safe to say you're the best-looking girl ever!

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And I bet you're ever so smart!

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I think we're going to be good friends.

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Aaargh!

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You're beautiful!

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BECKY AND SCULPTURE: Me?

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She's funny-looking, but...nice.

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Weird, strange, unnaturally re-animated mud, but...nice.

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Kind of. In fact, we need to get rid of her.

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No! When she tells me things,

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it's like that confident little inner voice

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I always wanted, but massive and outside.

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Oh! Are you running for president?

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Yes. Yes, I am.

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We're keeping her.

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OK. But she needs a disguise.

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The Lost And Found. Where fashions go to die.

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And who is this?

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It's my, um, cousin...

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Bocky.

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I'm Becky's bestest friend ever!

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THEY LAUGH

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Come and sit with me, Bocky.

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Going to run things this smoothly as class president?

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O-M-Me! Who would vote for you?

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I would! I think Becky would make an excellent class president.

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-And I think Bocky will make an excellent vice president.

-Hey!

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Vote! Vote for Becky and Bocky!

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I will! Just don't kill me!

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Hi! Ooh, what a neat wheelchair!

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-Thank you.

-Vote for Becky and Bocky!

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-I will.

-Can I have a ride?

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No!

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Scary enthusiasm doesn't count as intimidation, does it?

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Nah. Get your votes any way you can, then you can do good for me

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and er, and everyone.

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Vote Becky-Bocky!

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I can't breath, but I certainly will!

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I cannot believe they'd resort to, like, unfair tactics to get votes.

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Handful of money for your vote?

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I have been totes on-the-level with that girl,

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but now the gloves are coming off.

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That big grey dope is going down.

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Ooh, great hit, Becky! Only the greatest athletic move ever!

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Well, I don't... GLASS SHATTERS

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-Whoops!

-You know, Bocky,

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you might want to tone down the enthusiasm just a smidge.

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Ooh, that is a great idea, Becky!

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And I love how you said "smidge"!

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-Thanks.

-No, thank you!

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I'm going to give you a hug!

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Here's the plan. I've wedged a bin in the tree.

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I'll cry out. Sappy Bocky will think I'm in trouble, rush over.

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Boom! Binned! No-one will vote for a stinker!

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-Ready?

-Ready!

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-Mmm, you smell so good!

-Argh!

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Put me down! Ugh!

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Sometimes you can be so annoying!

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Waahhh!

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You hurt my giant overblown feelings!

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-Wahhhhh!

-Ow!

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I think I hurt my ankle or, uh, something.

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She's hurt! I better help her!

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No, wait! It could be a trap!

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Urgh, urgh...

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-Look out!

-Oh!

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You saved me!

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I've never said this before to anyone, but...

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thanks, Bocky!

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Well, I'm glad someone appreciates me.

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I appreciate you much more than Becky. In fact, Bocky,

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I have an offer for you!

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An offer! I love offers!

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What's an offer?

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Hi, guys! Vote for Stephanie!

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"Vote For Stephanie and Bocky for president and vice president"?

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Oh, Bocky! How could you?

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It was easy.

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She just promised me all sorts of wonderful things I never imagined!

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How about that? She's a good politician, after all.

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You can't just take Bocky. She's my running mate!

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She's a vote-winner!

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Looks like she's all mine and you're out of luck once again, Butters.

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Ew, your last name is Butters?

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-Ew!

-Ew!

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-Ew!

-Ew!

-Ew!

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I don't know how much worse this can get.

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-Ew!

-Ew!

-Ew!

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You too, Templeton?

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I must follow my involuntarily striated cardiac muscle.

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-Your heart?

-Yes, that as well. I'm in love with Bocky!

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It's stronger than it ever was with a girl!

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You've never been in love with an actual girl!

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I know! I guess I have my type.

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Come on, Mitchell.

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Let's get out of here before we fall under Bocky's "magical spell".

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Bye!

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What am I going to do?

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You don't need Bocky.

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She's just what's been inside you all along.

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Confidence-wise. Not personality-wise.

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I mean, you're normal. Not massive and threatening.

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Please, don't hurt me.

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-You really think I can do it without her?

-Sure. You got me.

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And I'll say anything.

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Election day is upon us.

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The candidates will make their speeches, then you can vote

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and get back to whatever it is that you people do.

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(Oh, yes - making my life a misery.)

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Thank you!

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Of course, I don't need any introduction,

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but my running mate does.

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She saved my life and she'll save yours, too!

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I give you, Bocky!

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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

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Bing!

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Vote for me and Bocky. I'm great and she's probably magic.

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Thank you.

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CHEERING AND WHISTLES

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Hi. I'm Becky Butters.

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And, um, I don't have a flashy running mate

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and I'm not super popular.

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-We know!

-But I do have ideas.

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And that's something my opponent doesn't have any of at all.

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If you vote for me, I'll work my darnedest

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and maybe, just maybe, with my ideas, we can make this school great.

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Like the generator out back.

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It may be old, but it still huffs and puffs away.

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Why don't you huff and puff away?!

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Ah, ha-ha-ha!

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Yeah, we like Bocky now. She's something new

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and we're easily bored, innit!

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Hey, shut up! All of you! Let Becky speak.

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You're acting like a bunch of farmyard animals.

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-Woof!

-Buck-aw!

-Moo!

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Who the heck are you?!

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I'm...her running mate. So vote for us!

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You've been great, thank you!

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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

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Stupid election!

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Murdoch! Please place this rubbish somewhere it can't harm anybody.

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HE SIGHS

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Don't worry. It'll be all right.

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Are you just saying that to be nice?

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Yeah. You were beaten by an empty-headed girl

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and a grey girl dressed like an explosion in a clothing factory.

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-What do you want me to say?

-Say tomorrow's another day,

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that Stephanie never does anything,

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so maybe I won't be reminded of the worst defeat ever.

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Tomorrow's another day.

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And...wait, what was the rest? Sorry!

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I had a good night's sleep

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and I feel like I can finally put all this behind me.

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Behind you!

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What the heck was that?

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Only our president and vice president.

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The greatest leaders this school or society has ever known!

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I truly admire them. Especially Stephanie. And especially Bocky.

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Ha-ha-ha-ha!

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That was strange.

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So strange it merits investigation.

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Especially because it's time for Maths.

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"presidential Suite"?

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This wasn't here before.

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I'm pretty sure it was a storage closet.

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And judging by that pile of brooms thrown over there, I know I'm right!

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Huh...

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BOTH: Hey!

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Hi! You can sit up now!

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It's fun to sit up!

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-GROANS:

-Shut up!

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OK!

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So that's why everyone's in love with you guys.

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You've been potatoing the whole school!

0:18:320:18:36

Right again, Mr Tanner.

0:18:360:18:39

Atchoo!

0:18:390:18:41

And soon you'll be just like them.

0:18:410:18:43

Did you potato yourself?

0:18:430:18:45

No, I did it for love! Ha-ha!

0:18:450:18:48

Atchoo! Tissue me, darling.

0:18:480:18:50

Stephanie's nice to me.

0:18:500:18:52

She'll push you aside the second she doesn't need you!

0:18:520:18:56

But I need you.

0:18:560:18:58

I'm a very needy person!

0:18:580:19:02

Templeton, give 'em the juice!

0:19:020:19:04

But it's mine!

0:19:040:19:05

No, the electricity!

0:19:050:19:08

Oh! I'll do it myself.

0:19:080:19:10

-Watch out!

-STEPHANIE YELLS

0:19:140:19:15

"Out of harm's way," he said.

0:19:180:19:21

It can't be safer from harm than with you, my sweet.

0:19:210:19:26

Whoa! Gennie!

0:19:270:19:29

Whoa!

0:19:310:19:33

What a big pile of...

0:19:340:19:37

You know, winning a school election's one thing,

0:19:370:19:39

but going all supervillainy...

0:19:390:19:41

CRASHING AND ROARING

0:19:410:19:45

It's a garbage monster!

0:19:460:19:47

No! Take her! She's gross!

0:19:470:19:51

But you said...

0:19:510:19:52

Don't listen to her! You're beautiful!

0:19:520:19:55

Oh!

0:19:550:19:56

Help!

0:19:580:19:59

My mum always said all the rubbish I eat would be the end of me,

0:19:590:20:03

but this is ridiculou-u-u-us!

0:20:030:20:06

No! Becky is my friend!

0:20:060:20:12

Thanks! GARBAGE MONSTER ROARS

0:20:130:20:16

Goodbye, friends! It was really fun!

0:20:160:20:20

Even this is interesting!

0:20:200:20:23

My love!

0:20:230:20:25

Don't cry like an idiot yet! I have an idea!

0:20:250:20:28

Potato!

0:20:330:20:34

Ahhh!

0:20:370:20:39

Ahhh! No!

0:20:400:20:42

Speak to me, darling.

0:20:440:20:46

Why? Why-y-y-y-y-y?!

0:20:460:20:50

Oh, OK, she was just clay. What's for lunch?

0:20:500:20:53

Butters, Tanner... Uh, Weird Boy, this is an excellent idea.

0:20:530:20:59

And if you want more power, just add more potatoes.

0:20:590:21:01

Are you sure this will work?

0:21:010:21:03

I call it the Bocky Generator,

0:21:030:21:05

in honour of the muse that inspired its construction.

0:21:050:21:08

Boy's a genius.

0:21:080:21:11

Awful misguided in love, but a genius nonetheless. Ha-ha!

0:21:110:21:17

That's got to be worth a two-day school week.

0:21:170:21:20

-Homework ban?

-Tanner!

0:21:200:21:22

Hey, can't blame me for trying.

0:21:220:21:24

Er, sir? Permission to report a theft of school potatoes, sir!

0:21:240:21:28

Where on Earth could they have gone?

0:21:280:21:31

It's a mystery, sir!

0:21:310:21:32

But I've got 600 servings of mash to do!

0:21:320:21:35

Now!

0:21:350:21:37

EVERYONE YELLS

0:21:370:21:39

Ah! Lunch is served.

0:21:390:21:44

# I think I'm seeing double

0:21:480:21:50

# I-I-I think I'm seeing double

0:21:500:21:52

# One times two One-one times two

0:21:520:21:54

# Can't let go, s'like I'm seeing my own echo! Echo! #

0:21:540:21:57

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