Lost and Found The Dumping Ground

Go on, lads.

KLAXON BLARES

Yes, yes!

Come on, Bailey!

CHEERING

Ooh, sorry.

That's all right.

WHISTLE BLOWS

You totally won it for the Blues!

You're definitely going to get a scholarship.

Hey, erm, my manager wants to see my later.

Way to go! Can you sign your match shirt for me?

< What are you doing?

It'll be worth megabucks when he's top goal scorer for England.

See! You're going to win it one day.

Top chav more like.

Ryan...

Oh, go on, Bailey!

ALL: Bailey, Bailey, Bailey!

Go on, Bailey!

ALL: Yeah, woo!

Bailey Wharton?

Were you at the football trials?

Yeah, if you're an agent you've got to talk to my manager.

I, er... I'm not an agent.

I'm your mum.

I've been trying to track you down for years

and then I saw this in the paper.

Found out you was playing yesterday.

Get Mike.

How do you know I live here?

One of your team-mates told me.

I'm so sorry, Bailey.

Mike, we need you in the garden.

DOORBELL

One second.

Mike Milligan?

-Yes.

-Rowena Spike and Lizzy Druitt from Ofsted.

Lucky you.

It's inspection day.

You said you were trying to track me down.

Yeah, that's rubbish, cos you could have called my dad.

It's not that simple.

You need to leave now unless you have official permission.

-Kazima, chill out!

-The inspectors from Ofsted are here.

-Bailey...

-No.

No, you walked out when I was two.

I don't need my mum no more.

Bailey, wait.

An Ofsted inspection?

I can't leave him like this. Can you talk to him for me?

Inspecting what?

Er, basically how Mike runs the dumping ground.

They check every single file in the office.

Yeah, check our daily logs.

And ask loads of dumb questions like how much salad do we eat.

They marked my last place so bad it nearly got shut down.

Did Mike know they were coming?

No, that's the whole point.

They catch you on a normal day.

Sanction book, complaints book,

risk assessments, health and safety log,

care plans, hospital and doctor's reports.

Told you to get lost.

Er...

Is she yours or...or?

Is it a he?

It's none of your business.

Come on, Bailey. She's your mum. You can give her five minutes.

Er, I can...

Can see that you're into your footie, then...

My dad, he would have been proud.

That's your grandad, Bailey.

Clock's ticking, yeah?

Sorry. What was that again, now?

A fire extinguisher is used for fires, not propping open doors.

And what's that up there?

Where's the batteries for the smoke alarm?

-TV remote.

-Oh, Tyler...

Right, grand tour before we get stuck in.

Let's have Floss and Sasha do the honours.

Ladies...

It was the hardest thing I ever did,

saying goodbye.

It's true.

I wanted to...

To get settled somewhere safe and then come for you,

but your dad, he moved house

without telling me. I couldn't find where you'd gone.

Safe from who?

Bailey's dad?

I don't want to diss him

-if you two are close.

-We're not close.

He stopped writing.

Probably one of his benders again.

But what would you know?

It's not like you ever looked for me very hard.

I thought about you

every day, OK?

Everything I ever did was about making a better life for us.

Oh, please.

OK then.

I got a job

looking after old people.

I want you to be proud of me.

I grew up without a mum.

I used to think you were dead.

ALARM BEEPS

Time's up. Now get out.

Bailey...

Get out.

This is our bathroom that we all share.

Guess we got some more paintings...

New art?

An intruder! Help!

Oh, Floss...

I had no idea she was here.

Do you often have members of the public wandering around?

Oh, erm, she's not members of the public. She's Bailey's mum.

What?

She hasn't been on the scene for years.

I've never even met her.

Obviously, we would have been all over this,

but if you hadn't arrived.

Coping with a multiple workload, managing your time.

This isn't typical.

I promise.

Let's find out.

I want to see your safeguarding procedures and your incident book.

Yes, straight away.

-Is she gone?

-Yes.

I told her to go through your social worker next time

if she wants to see you, OK?

Yeah, let her try.

Oh!

Oh!

-Germs?

-Allergic.

This is Mischief, yeah? He lives here.

Mischief?

Doesn't say you have a house pet.

-Was it formally agreed?

-We saved him from the street.

-He was going to die otherwise.

-He's really well trained.

He's eating paper.

It's fine. Floss does it all the time.

-Floss eats paper?

-Yes.

Cos I'm hungry for words. I could eat all the books in the world.

That is beautifully said, Floss.

Who's your favourite author?

She likes Twits.

That's for kids. Will-i-am Shakespeare?

Awesome! Me too! Which play do you like best?

-So many to choose from.

-Yeah.

A Sweaty Blind Man?

That's just her code name.

Cos it's a secret.

A secret from who?

Mike and May-Li.

See we're going to be performing that as a surprise.

Wow!

Double awesome!

You told them you're putting on a Shakespeare play tomorrow?

Are you insane?

We can tell them it was a misunderstanding.

You know, you guys just got carried away.

-Mike?

-Yeah.

-Ready?

-Yeah.

-She's scary.

-How's it all going out there?

Yeah, exactly.

See, I think that we need something double awesome to make up for

the missing fire alarm batteries, and you know, the random mums.

Well, if we're going to do a play, we need a director.

I can be the director. How hard could it be?

Good luck.

I might have passed your number on.

Guys, we need to decide what play we're going to do,

so I'm thinking Romeo and Juliet.

It's too soppy. How about The Winter's Tale?

The only Shakespeare play with a bear in it.

-Excuse me. Who's the director here?

-A polar bear?

-Or a koala bear?

Koala isn't actually a bear, it's a marsupial.

-OK, can we stop talking about bears? Yeah.

-So, hands up for my pick.

Bear takes it. You lose.

-All right.

-The Winter's Tale.

King Leontes plunges into a jealous rage

-because he thinks his wife is cheating on him.

-Who with?

His best friend Polixenes.

So he banishes the newborn baby to an island

and sends Hermione to a prison where she dies of a broken heart.

-It's not a comedy, then?

-No.

Meanwhile, on the island, baby...

Fast forward 16 years and she falls in love with Polixenes' son...

She wasn't really dead.

Leontes said sorry and everyone is happy. The end.

Can't we do The Lion King instead?

No, I think this could work.

Right. You guys focus and I'll hand out these parts.

OK?

SHOUTING

-Married to Tee, are you serious?

-Why can't Bailey play King Leontes?

I've got a scholarship meeting.

Look, if there's any kissing then I'm going to need a body double.

A body double?! Ryan, are you too much of a baby to do this?

Look, I've got more theatrical experience than anyone here.

It doesn't matter because, Ryan, you look older.

-I can play old. That's the whole point of acting.

-Costume budget.

If I'm going to make a killer bear suit then I'm going to need cash.

Very clever. That will do the trick. Ryan!

-Can I be the king?

-Is that you?

It's me and my...

My mum.

Are you going to see her, if your social worker asks?

Why should I?

Cos she's making more of an effort than mine ever does.

-What do you reckon?

-I don't know.

I kind of bag-lady Cruella, with really bad taste.

Sounds like a whole load of bear to me.

Is that Bailey's mum?

What she doing here?

Look.

There isn't a bottomless pit of money.

-A bottomless pit of...

-Quick!

PHONE RINGS

You all right?

-You dropped...

-Thanks.

Thank you.

Have you ordered?

You know you can have whatever you want. It's my treat.

Have you spoke to my social worker?

You saying you want me to? Cos I wasn't sure.

I thought you were out shopping.

We got distracted.

Ask your mum where she just was.

2-1 cocktails.

What were you doing there?

If you're going to spy on me, get it right.

-I was actually working.

-Working?

-Yeah, I got a shift.

Behind the bar.

I thought you worked with old people.

Which is why I didn't want him to know.

Thanks, guys.

Look, I...

I lost my job yesterday.

My boss, he wouldn't give me the time off, so I walked.

You quit?

-To go to a football match.

-To see my son.

And... Well, now I'm...

Well, now I'm homeless because the job, it was live in and,

which is why I was picking up a few quid anyway I could, OK?

To pay for my bill at the B&B.

So you lost...

You lost your home and your job cos of me?

You know, all these years I've been...

Been missing a piece of me.

I couldn't wait another day.

We're going to crack on with the bear suit. You coming?

I haven't ordered yet.

And I want it learnt by tomorrow, OK?

-OK.

-Edited version. I took out all the bits Carmen couldn't understand.

-As long as I still get to send...

-HE MISPRONOUNCES:

-Hermione

-..to jail.

-It's Hermione, OK?

Unless you want to call me Her Majesty?

Hey. How far have you got?

SHOUTING

I may not be young Mo, but his royal highness, the King.

-Read my lips. You are not playing Leonardo.

-Leontes.

Carmen, actors can be a nightmare, everybody knows that.

You've just got to use your people skills.

Mo, I need you to play Floriband.

-Florizel.

-Florizel.

It's the prince that falls in love with the baby 16 years later,

and you can't to do a special little dance with Harry.

Dance? What dance?

You said Perdita was a pirate.

Pirate, princess, what's the difference.

I'm not being a girl.

Oh, yes, you are, Harry. We need you.

We could hang out longer, but...

..I've got my scholarship meeting.

-Scholarship?

-Yeah.

To see if the club are going to give me a contract.

Already?

Not that I'm surprised.

You totally own that pitch.

I'll play even better next time if I know you're watching.

So you just try and keep me away.

I'm so going to be there at the touchline.

Forget the touchline.

You'll be in the box.

Can you text me and let me know how it goes?

I wish I could stick around to find out.

You're going?

I can't afford the B&B for another night.

You know what? This is your big break, OK?

I don't want to burden you with my problems. All right?

Good luck.

Put it over here. Pull over. Yeah, that's it.

Yes. Keep it here so we get the full shock value.

Best bear ever.

Yeah, I'm calling about the flat on your website.

Near the football ground.

Yeah, I've just been signed for the youth squad.

Yeah. I'll take it.

-Bailey, you off now?

-Yeah, I got my academy meeting in half an hour.

Good luck. They'll be very fortunate to have you.

-Um, I heard about your mum.

-Yeah, weird, isn't it?

Obviously, we'll talk about some proper contact.

But focus on your academy meeting first.

You need to show them you understand the responsibility of a scholarship.

-I'm on it. Chill.

-And obviously... Bailey, I should come with you.

-No, no worries. It is all in hand.

-OK.

But good luck with Ofsted, though, yeah?

Sure. Thanks.

'He has the ball. He's running down the pitch.

'Looks like he can score.

'Oh, it's a goal!

'This proves Bailey Wharton is worth every penny of his transfer fee.'

DOG BARKS

CHEERING

Bailey. You're up next.

'We have landed in... Should we say it together?

'We have landed in...'

-Tyler, you are on.

-Yes!

What?

No, my lovely bear suit! Mischief.

It was in your room, how did it get out here?

-Oh, I wonder.

-I didn't know Mischief would eat him.

-Do you know what this means, Harry?

-No bear means no play.

It means we're going to fail the inspection.

They're going to close us down, and it is all your fault.

-I hid it because I didn't want to be a girl.

-Grow up.

Alas, poor Bernard.

You are unique, irreplaceable.

-There will never be a bear like you again.

-There might be.

-I can't believe I'm doing this.

-Ready?

-Yes.

-Let's go.

Shut up about the bear, we are professional people.

-Please say it is good news.

-What do you think?

Am I congratulating our first-ever football apprentice?

Yeah, I guess.

-Yes!

-THEY CHEER

Will you live with us when you are a pro?

-Can I have your room, then?

-You will be on 20 grand a week.

A million grand.

Well, sporting and theatrical talents, we are

-going to blow the inspectors away.

-Bailey could do a football demo.

-Mike?

-Yeah?

-Care plans.

-Yes, right, sure, coming up.

Excuse me, coming through, coming through.

Yeah, um, I better go work out my moves.

HE LAUGHS

KNOCK ON DOOR

DOOR OPENS

-This is Mr Twigg. He owns the restaurant.

-Hi.

-Hi.

Harry and Finn.

I never forget a customer.

And I never forget him.

Oh!

Wow.

SHE LAUGHS

Mum.

Go on. Open it.

I knew you would get in.

My little superstar.

THEY LAUGH

What, aren't you going to ask me how I know?

-Uh...

-The letting agent rang me.

Apparently my son is renting a flat from next week.

Yeah.

-Why did he call you?

-Well, you might be a football genius,

but you are not old enough to sign a rental agreement.

I can't believe you didn't tell me.

I was going to tell you. I was.

It is for us, right? I'm not getting ahead of myself?

Of course it is for us.

Because this is the dream that has kept me going, you know.

Living with my little boy again.

Well, you are a big boy now.

Come here.

Turn it round. There we go.

-Whoa! It's outstanding.

-Yeah, thanks, Finn.

What do you think, Carmen?

It's cool, but if you think that gets you out of playing Perdita.

You killed the bear. Wearing a dress is the least you can do.

Come on, mate, take one for the team.

OK, I'll do it, but only for Mike.

OK, good. Right, now, scene three from the top. Come on.

HE MUMBLES

..the skies...

HE MUMBLES

Come, poor babe, blah, blah.

Throw out my poor babe, leave it crying...

in the rain, in a forest?!

-Are you having a laugh?

-Just drop the doll on the ground.

-No.

I didn't agree to dump the baby.

-If you don't abandon the baby, there is no story.

-It is cruel and nasty.

I'm having nothing to do with it.

Fine, I'll play her part.

Throw out my poor babe, this is the chase.

I'll be gone for ever.

Bailey, can I have a word?

Roar!

SHE YELLS

Ross!

-Have the inspectors gone, then?

-They're coming back tomorrow.

I have a feeling I'm going to be here all night.

Your manager called to make sure you are OK.

I'm sorry you didn't make it.

Lots of the lads were released, it's not just you.

They said you were a fine player.

You just don't have that extra edge to turn pro.

You got binned?

Why didn't you just tell us?

You wouldn't understand.

DOG PINES

DOG PINES