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The Eradicator Trust Me I'm a Genie

The Eradicator

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I was hit by a can, opened it and out popped a genie!

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# Three wishes set me free

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# Trust me I'm a genie! #

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Wish one

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-And on that first day I got my very own cafe!

-Ta-da!

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-Wish two.

-That was cool!

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-I got my own swimming pool!

-Hee-hee!

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But then I got the magic can

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and it filled with sand?!

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And the works got jammed!

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-Wish three.

-A total catastrophe!

-Ugh.

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The genie raved and ranted.

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But no third wish was granted?!

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# If one more wish comes true #

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Then I'll be free from you!

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Trust me, I'm a genie!

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'One fight!'

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Sandwiches.

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Ha!

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What did I miss? What did I miss?

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Level four, reached with difficulty.

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Samurai Turtle miraculously defeated.

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Oh, do be quiet!

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The Eradicator!

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What was wrong with Genies And Dragons?!

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Geek magazine says the first person to beat the Eradicator

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will win the ultimate prize.

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ALL: The Golden Hardcore Gamers' Joystick!

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Shush! You're putting me off!

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"Personal log of Eradicator game tactics?!"

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-Put it back, will you?

-Ah, give me that!

-Argh!

-Eee!

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'Game Over. You lose.'

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-ALL GASP

-I'd almost done it!

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How could you, Tony?

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Get out your handkerchiefs! It's my turn.

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ALL LAUGH

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You?

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Correct me, but haven't you always been the most...

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Oh, how can I put it?

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-Unsuccessful?

-Unlucky?

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USELESS!

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How can you hope to beat the Eradicator,

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-if

-I

-can't with my EXHAUSTIVE book of tricks?

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Because I've got this!

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The Megaspeed Zapmaster, with built-in turbo buttons

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and carbonate plastic, sweat absorbent, contours.

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ALL: Wow!

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How did you get that, man?

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Easy, when you've got a genie.

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I sold my whole collection of Ninja Warthog trading cards to buy this!

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And now I am going to beat the Eradicator.

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The most ruthless adversary ever invented!

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Attack the troll with the laser, it gives you extra lives!

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Take the magic potion.

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-Go left, there's a secret passage behind the pillar!

-Water!

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HE SLURPS

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Hey, guys! This is it. I'm up against the Eradicator!

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You're going to be annihilated.

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Get out your cameras, I'm about to make history!

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Go for it, Diego!

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Hey, look out! The eradication ray!

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-'Game over.'

-Wah!

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Ha! What did I tell you? Ha-ha-ho!

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Come on, snap out of it!

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Who cares about a stupid game?

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You don't get it, do you?

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If I'd beaten the Eradicator

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I'd have been respected by every gamer in the world!

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You still can be.

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It takes a wish and the Golden Joystick can be yours!

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And everyone who laughed at you

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will have to bow down to the new king of the gamers!

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The new king of the gamers!

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"Diego, the camel who beat the Eradicator!"

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How cool would that be?

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SQUAWKING

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You're the BEST, Diego!

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OK, Ziggy, here's my wish.

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-I want to beat the Eradicator.

-Got it!

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I call upon the powers that be to grant this wish and set me free!

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Oh!

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What's this manky old joystick for?

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Well, ha-ha, it's not just any old joystick. It's, erm, magic!

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That's right, it's magic!

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This joystick is going to make you, erm, superfast - trust me!

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I'm a genie!

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CRUNCH

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-Ah!

-SIREN WAILS

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-What's got into you?

-Nothing, ha-ha!

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I must have sneezed without noticing.

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Wah! Ow!

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Ow-ow-ow-wo-wo!

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-What?

-Wah!

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Ouch!

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-OW!

-Wow! This joystick's controlling you!

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Wah-ow!

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Wah! Ouch!

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Wah! Ow!

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What? OW!

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Ouch!

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I'm not going to beat the Eradicator with this thing!

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All it does is control you!

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At least try it with a game. What harm can it do?

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OK, but don't come complaining if you hurt yourself!

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You can do this!

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He'll beat the Eradicator and I'll be freeeee!

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Wah-oo!

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Whoa! Ow! Ow! Wah!

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Ow-ow-OW! Ouch!

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-GLASS SMASHES

-OW!

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Oh-oof! Ha-ha!

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Ee-ha-ho-wah!

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Doh! Ow, ah!

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Hey, Ziggy, this joystick's rubbish! I think I'm going to...

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OW!

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HE THUDS

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Oh!

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Look at this mess!

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And all because of your stupid magic joystick!

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I'm going to go back to the old one!

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Huh?

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The Eradicator, your worst nightmare begins here.

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-But, but, but, but you have to use it to beat the Eradicator!

-No way!

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Wah!

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ZIGGY!

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Waaah-oof!

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Ah! Woo-ah!

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-Wah!

-SPLASH!

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Ahhhh!

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-Ah!

-Huh?

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Ow!

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Oh, my roses!

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Ah!

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Ahhh!

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The joystick! You stole it, you jackal!

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Dessert fox, if you don't mind.

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Now no-one can stop me being the first to beat the Eradicator!

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That's what you think! Give me back my joystick!

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-In your dreams!

-Ow!

-Amazing!

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Give that to meee!

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CRACKLING ELECTRICITY

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Raaaargh!

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OK, you win. Take it.

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Raaaaargh!

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E-RAD-I-CATOR!

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Ah!

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Oh-ah-oh-ah!

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Ah-ah-ah! Wah!

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Wah!

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BUBBLING

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RARGH!

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-Oh, my roses!

-SMASHING

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Oh, no! My flowers!

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Uh-oh!

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We have to DO something!

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Good thinking. Like, get out of here?

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-UH!

-Oh!

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How about we get out of here too?

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It's you and me, Ziggy.

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Let's show that monster what YOU'RE made of!

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What are you talking about?

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Whoa-ahhhh!

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Oof! Ugh!

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Huh-huh-huh!

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Ow!

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-Whoa!

-Rrrgh!

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Ah?

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Ah! Ya!

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-Ya!

-Argh!

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SMACKING

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WHOOSH & RATTLE

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Oops!

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Rrragh!

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Oops, oops, oops!

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Oh, come on, Ziggy! Get out of there! RATTLING

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Oh, come on!

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Ya-ha!

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Ta-da-da-da-da!

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Argh! Rgh!

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Argh!

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Rgh!

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RRRAAAAAARGH!

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Ugh!

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I have to DO something!

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The very future of civilisation depends on it!

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Rrgh! Ah!

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Not so clever now, eh?

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We've only just begun!

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The eradication ray!

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Ya-ha!

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Ha! The moment's come.

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Just one more zap to grant the wish and I'll be free!

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Free! Ha-ha-ha!

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Prepare to be beaten, Eradicator! Your days are numbered!

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Oh?

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I don't believe you, Joe.

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I was just about to beat the Eradicator!

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I'm sorry, but I did what had to be done.

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If the Eradicator was a menace, then somebody had to take responsibility.

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Don't be jealous.

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-You'll have your hour of glory!

-KNOCKING

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There were these ENORMOUS arcs of electricity,

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they were coming at me from the right, from the left.

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I was hit once, twice, THREE TIMES!

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But I wasn't afraid!

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I carried on regardless of danger,

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-pulled the plug out and saved the oasis from disaster.

-Diego!

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Look at this, they brought out Eradicator Two!

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Bigger monster, bigger fun! Hey, what do you say?

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I thought you said computer games were stupid?

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Oh.

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Eradicator Two is boring already.

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Lethal Mutant Extra Revenge Four will be out next month!

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Eradicator, Lethal Mutant?! Just a bunch of pixels!

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Switch the console back on and I'll give it to him real good!

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I'm well up for it!

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Lethal Mutant Extra Revenge Four isn't a video game,

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it's the latest Jackie Cheen Film. Get with it, Ziggy!

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Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd.

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Email [email protected]

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