Some Will, Some Won't, So What, Next! The Call Centre

It is free of charge to have your loft and cavity walls

insulated to the new standards.

Over a million people now work in UK call centres,

with an average age of just 26.

'I'm not interested, thank you.'

'I think it's all a scam, to be honest with you.'

They are the factories of our time.

But here, at the third largest call centre in Swansea,

the only things being made are the cold calls we dread.

'No, no, no.'

'Stop bloody bothering me.'

'I really don't want these calls

'and certainly not at 7pm.'

Holding the reins is CEO, Nev Wilshire.

With over half of his sales agents under 25, Nev has developed

a unique approach to keeping his young workforce on their toes.

Sums up my management style.

HE SHOUTS: Get out of my office!

There's a yawn at the back! Get down!

Probably Napoleon - dictator...

Tell her she's sacked, then.

..but his troops loved him.

He's awful, absolutely awful.

'And with a sales floor simmering with stress...'

'Piss off.'

This ain't funny - this ain't funny now, cos you could have broke it.

I'm going to kill someone.

-'..sex...'

-Rarr.

'..and success...'

Almost getting a little excited in my pants right now.

Ohh, sss! Ohh, sss!

'..there's never a dull day when you work at this Swansea call centre.'

There's winners and there's losers, and that's it.

CHEERING

To be in charge of 700 people, sometimes it's daunting,

but, er, I love it - I absolutely love it.

Welcome to Nev's world.

Well, hello, my name is Ania Rushton.

I'm one of the local grants advisors for the area there.

Are you aware now that it's all free of charge to have your

loft and your cavity walls insulated to the new standards?

You haven't had that done yet, have you, Mrs Lockett?

The Welsh call centre industry is holding a competition to find

the nation's finest voice.

We've entered The Voice Of The Welsh Call Centre competition,

so all call centres in Wales can put somebody forward to, er,

if they've got nice voices, whether masculine or sexy female

or whatever it is, and er, the winner will have their face

on the side of a bus advertising Welsh call centres.

-Nev?

-What? What now?!

Don't bite my head off, but I've only come for two seconds

to have advice off of you, because I'm auditioning now

for The Voice Of The Welsh Call Centre, and I want you to give me

a couple of tips on how I can make my voice more commanding,

cos everyone listens to you - you know,

you've got that big, powerful, massive voice.

What's... What's the most fundamental thing you can do?

Be yourself.

-Smile.

-Oh, yeah, smile while you dial.

Your voice changes, your pitch changes, your enthusiasm changes.

You know, you think of something that really makes you laugh,

I'm just thinking of my brother losing his hair again... HE CHUCKLES

-..there it is again, all right, so...

-Yeah.

-You enthuse, you're cheery,

your voice is the right pitch and, er, and off you go.

Big smile as you dial.

Stand your full height - get in there with a big smile.

Sit down, do your stuff.

Yeah. I'm gunning for it now!

-All right?

-Yeah, that's proper perked me up. Come here.

Good man, oh, no, no! I don't do this sort of thing!

No, not till you let me...

NEV LAUGHS

21-year-old Sean has been at the call centre for just over a year

and has learnt to take the rough with the smooth.

Some people get uncomfortable on the phones speaking to

a boy who's got quite a camp voice,

but most people just tend to gravitate towards it, actually.

-MAN: 'You're talking crap.'

-Sorry?

-'You're talking crap.'

-I do appreciate, sir...

-'You're making it up.'

-No, we're not...

-'You're making it up.'

-No, we're not making it up, sir.

-LINE GOES DEAD

-It just shows up on my database that you missed... Oh.

But Sean's confident his voice has got what it takes for the competition.

I wouldn't have entered if I didn't think I could win it.

People who else were auditioning were quite good, as well,

but I'm better so I'll just win it - I know I will.

For Nev's 700 staff,

their voice is the tool valued above all else.

The voice is very important - you need to be upbeat,

you need to be smiling down the phone as you're dialling -

if you've got a voice that sounds like you haven't got a clue

what you're talking about, people aren't going to listen.

If you've got a confident voice that, erm, that sounds professional,

then you've got every chance.

23-year-old Hayley is the call centre tea lady

but she started out working on the phones.

You've got to sound professional

when you're speaking to customers, so my voice will change completely.

I'll pronounce my words a bit better.

You can't have a monotone, robotic voice or whatever,

it can't be, "Nnnn",

it's got to be like, "Hi-ya!", you know, not, "Hiya."

30-year-old former actress Heledd has only been at the call centre

for a couple of months, but has quickly found her feet.

I mean, the most boring way of saying it would be,

"I'm selling insulation" - er, but I try not to think about it like that,

I try to think of it as, erm, I'm selling lower energy bills,

I'm selling a warmer home... I'm selling happier people!

SHE LAUGHS

If you sound like you believe it, then maybe they will, too!

Hello, it's Sam from Nationwide Energy.

It's just a quick call for you - it shows that your property

in Magpie Avenue is still awaiting insulation.

Are you aware of the scheme, sir? LINE GOES DEAD

Hmm...

Nurturing his young staff is a key priority for Nev.

'In Swansea, if you're aged between 16 and 24,

'you've got a 40% chance of being unemployed.

'I love giving people jobs, and to give them not just a job,

'but a career, it's satisfying.'

All wannabe cold callers must spend two weeks at his telesales

finishing school, The Academy.

I won't intimidate the new staff too much... Yes, I will.

..the loft and the cavity walls.

Does he not like me fondling him?

Each shift is divided into teams, who fight over

the best recruits in the hope of boosting their sales.

We smashed out SPG insulation at about six per head.

Can anyone beat that on the floor?

Top sellers in the entire floor.

But it's not just the team leaders who are looking out for a new talent.

Normally, like, we'll see the people come in,

"Oh, have you seen that boy, the one with the blonde hair?",

cos you don't know their names.

The main thing is to find out their name and then when they move,

try and sit by them.

20-year-old Alex has been at the call centre for almost a year

and thinks it's the ideal place to meet the man of her dreams.

I've found you a husband.

-On Academy, this boy - have you seen him? He's lush.

-SHE GIGGLES

I know who it is.

The boy with the curly hair on Academy - he's lush -

a husband for one of us.

I'm single at the moment and I've only had one boyfriend in my life.

I've never even been on a proper date with a boy -

like, I've never had a boy take me out and pay for me or anything.

I never have but, like, oh, I just want to be...

I'd just rather be married, just get straight to the point!

-You know the boy in the Academy?

-Yeah.

-The really lush one?

-Which one's that?

Can you see him, with, like, curly hair, wearing, like, a purple shirt?

Right, yeah.

Please will you try and get him on our team?

Did you find out his name?

-Yes!

-What is it?

-Chris.

-Chris?

-Yeah, it's Chris.

-If I do this, you owe me.

-OK, OK - do it, quick, quick!

But Alex isn't the only one to find the new recruit easy on the eye.

-What it is, there's this new boy on Academy...

-Yeah.

I just think that the, erm...

-I just think that, erm, his aura would, er, work out really well on our team.

-Yeah?

But yeah, I'll get you ten deals if you ask Dwayne

if he can come on our team.

There's a hot guy just started, like, seriously, he's hot.

He's seriously beautiful, even when he walks away...

From behind, he's stunning.

In a few days' time, hot boy Kristian will be assigned

to a senior team, so to keep the smitten ladies happy and selling,

the team leaders must do battle for his services.

You've got, um, a really good sales person I'd like to put on my team.

I'm looking at... Well they're all going to move over Monday.

-Yeah.

-So there's about 20 people that I'm looking to put on to the senior teams.

-Someone in particular, is it?

-Erm, Kristian, is it?

Kristian... Do you know his surname? Let's have a look on here. I'll keep him in mind -

if it's something that you do want, I'll think about it.

-The boy who's coming up from the Academy...

-Yeah.

-I was wondering if,

-erm, the kid with the curly hair... do you know who I'm on about? Quite tall boy.

-Yeah, yeah.

He's been smashing it and I was wondering if there's any chance...

-Kristian?

-Yeah.

-What's with this kid? Is his sales that good?

I heard he smashed it on Friday.

Apparently, there's a guy on the Academy,

-he's got curly hair...

-Oh, let me guess, Kristian?

Is it? I don't know - he's got a purple shirt on...

You're the third team leader to come up to me today

and ask for a request for this guy.

-Alex wants him to come onto our team.

-Why?

I think she's got a little bit of a crush on him.

I'm not moving somebody onto your team because a girl on your team has a crush on him.

I've also got a crush on him.

I'm joking - I haven't got a crush on him.

Many boys would be lapping up the female attention,

but having come from a part-time job flipping burgers,

Kristian's enjoying the job for other reasons.

I love it, to be honest - I worked in McDonald's for four years

before this and the step up - I'm glad I worked there first,

to be fair, because you see the big difference in how they treat you

and the staff and things, I'm really enjoying it

and all the incentives - I mean, today, those four that have gone through that I put up there -

I mean, it's about £80 for today, on top of what I'm already earning,

which is brilliant for myself, really.

I've had every single team leader come up to me wanting this guy on their team.

I've had interest from Matt, I've had interest from Karl,

actually, I've had interest from everybody.

Judging by who we've so far given out, it's either Karl or Rhod -

I mean, all the girls are on Rhod's team, so that's another one.

Personally, I think Karl's team are probably the best for him.

We'll chuck him on Karl's team. I've got his best interests at heart,

not a few girls running round the call centre wanting to be close to him.

To select his champion voice for the national competition,

Nev's chosen a classic Welsh hymn for the auditions.

# Guide Me O Thou great Jehovah

# Pilgrim through this barren land... #

It's a lot of gibberish - it ain't even real words or that.

"Thou art..." "Thou art", like, you know.

The generation in this call centre would almost certainly

not know Bread Of Heaven, and if they've heard it before,

they certainly wouldn't know the words.

"Guide me O Thou great Jehovah

"Pilgrim through this barren land".

That's a load of shit. I ain't singing it.

Yeah, well, we're obviously not the type of people to sit there

-and watch, er, Songs Of Praise on a Sunday.

-Exactly.

Read the song and see if you can understand it.

"Guide me O...though..."

Hello, is that Mrs Mills?

Hello there, it's Sam from Nationwide Energy.

Guide me, O Thou great Jehovah

Pilgrim through this barren land I am weak...

But Thou art mighty...

Is it Welsh or not?

Hold me with Thy powerful hand.

Have you seen this stuff I've got to read? Shamed.

How many Welsh people do you know that actually speak Welsh?

I'm Welsh - this isn't... this is not Welsh - it's English.

So why don't I understand it?

# Bread of Heaven Bread of Heaven... #

Do you know Bread Of Heaven, right, is, erm, all about shagging?

-No, it's not!

-Yeah, it is.

Read that paragraph... Read those lines, those three lines out loud.

-Which ones?

-These... From there.

-Open now...

"Open now the crystal fountain Whence the healing stream shall flow

"Let Thy fire..." It is a bit rude, isn't it?!

-It is, isn't it?

-HE LAUGHS

See, Steff the tea lady knows! You've gone red.

Don't act like you haven't had a fiery, cloudy pillar in your life!

That's enough, that's enough.

I'm old enough to be your grandmother - knock it off. HE LAUGHS

Ah...! Yeah...

I mean, if we win, well, that's fantastic news, that's, er,

another competition we've won, but you do have some by-products,

er, some spin-offs - it will improve their voice,

it will improve their punctuation, and the enthusiasm goes up

in the call centre. I mean, enthusiasm breeds more sales.

Guide me O Thou great Jehovah

Pilgrim through this barren land

I am weak, but Thou art mighty Hold me with Thy powerful hand...

Lovely.

-ENTHUSIASTICALLY:

-Bread of Heaven Bread of Heaven

Feed me now and evermore.

Are you all right?

Oh, Miss Pearce is around here doling out the coffee.

-I have mine made down there.

-Do you?

They said, don't have that shit off Hayley, we'll make you a proper cup.

What?

Are we all happy? Are we living the dream?

Despite being a multi-millionaire businessman,

Nev is keen not to lose touch with the grass roots of his company.

The fact is, everybody's important to me in this company.

Everybody's doing a job, everybody's working hard,

so whether it's, er, Hayley the tea lady or John Blakemore the Finance Director, then, er,

they're all vitally important and I try to get to know them all.

I keep my finger on the pulse of the business.

Do you know what I mean by payment protection insurance?

'I'm not interested.'

One employee Nev's been taking a special interest in

is George Vorcas, who's been at the call centre for nine months.

'I'm not interested.'

In three words, I'd sum up the call centre as fun, enjoyable...

I can't think of a third word!

George is a good guy, er, he's dependable, salt-of-the-earth-type fellow.

In football, you need somebody to perform miracles out of things

but then you have to have the dog in the midfield to, er,

to do all the work, as well, and, er, to slog.

George is a slogger. Good, dependable, hard-working, decent guy.

I've had all the common dreams, you know, that I want to be a spaceman,

a policeman, an astronaut, er, sorry, a fireman...

but, erm, I'm happy with what I'm doing right now, so, yeah,

I think it's brilliant. I... I enjoy my work.

One area where George hasn't been closing the deals is his love life.

It's been a number of years since the last time I had er, a date.

Erm, it is quite important because I'm starting to get to that age now,

I'm 30 years old, so it would be nice to re-kindle the fire...

HE LAUGHS

The thing is, with PPI, it does get added onto people's loans

and credit cards, a lot of time without their actual knowledge.

'I'm not interested, OK?'

-'Sorry. Bye.'

-CALLER HANGS UP

George is a lovely, lovely man -

there's somebody out there for everybody

and we've just got to find George's.

And after a company speed-dating night, organised by Nev, George may now have got lucky.

Guys, can we just say really well done to George, he's got a date from speed-dating!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

There you go.

And it's Lisa from the other shift.

29-year-old single mum Lisa was the only person to mark George as hot.

Yeah, of course she's pretty, yeah, really good-looking, honestly -

hopefully she thinks I'm good-looking, as well.

Someone's got to take him, I suppose. He ain't had none...

George, how long is it, George? Six years, is it?

It's George calling from We Claim You Gain

and it's about a refund that you should now be entitled to.

But Lisa's head was also turned by new recruit, Sean,

who happens to be a rising star with the local rugby team.

# Cupid, draw back your bow... #

SHE LAUGHS

He is my type of guy, he is the kind of guy I'd go for - I mean,

he's really good-looking, he's got a fantastic body, erm, you know,

he's sporty and he's got a great personality.

I want to show you my best side, Sean, you know,

not my drunken side - it's not attractive.

SHE LAUGHS

I love you!

Hi, Nev.

Morning, Lisa, what are you doing here?

You're afternoon shift.

I know, I've come to see you.

Why, how much are you going to cost me?

-Nothing.

-Is this for your date with George, you looking for funding?

I really don't want to go on a date with him,

-really, really don't want to go on a date with him.

-That's mean.

It's not mean. I'm going on a date with Sean.

-Sean who?

-Sean Ford.

-The Ospreys guy?

-Yeah.

OK.

Well, I'm sure someone else will gladly step in my shoes.

-Poor, old George.

-I know, I do feel sorry for him and I really, really do.

-Ah, I'm sure you do.

-No, I do.

You don't care, no, I know.

-SHE GIGGLES

-Bye, Nev!

-Bye.

She was the only one, out of everybody that he talked to,

that put him down as hot.

I didn't want to tell him that she'd put EVERYONE down as hot...!

But the woman is a man-eater.

But Lisa will have to break the bad news to George in person.

Here we go... D-Day.

Yes, I'm totally fine.

I'm glad that you... I'm actually glad that you came over,

because, to be honest with you, about this whole date thing...

Yes.

..I've already got someone else.

-Wicked.

-A sort of date thing.

-Fab, as long as you're sorted,

-that's fine.

-So, yeah, you know, I'm sorry.

That's OK.

Sorry about that, erm... I've got to get back to it.

Cheers, see you later.

CHEERING

But there's a reason behind George's sudden change of heart.

I heard that Lisa was coming on the shift today to, er, cancel the date

with George in front of the team,

so I managed to have a word with him beforehand about

what was the best course of action.

I got, er, the heads up from people, so I got my foot in there first

and, er, I blew her out, ain't it? You know!

Yeah, I feel quite responsible for...not just George,

but everyone that works for us and I want to wrap them in cotton wool

and protect them as much as I can, really.

-Proud of you, mate.

-Yeah, man.

Well, I'm not an idiot, am I, so...

Hey, no-one makes anyone look a fool on my shift - good for you.

-Nice one, man. Thanks for that.

-I'm proud of you. Good work.

Nice one.

-What a player!

-Come on!

I only got one person.

One person.

Bread of Heaven

Bread of Heaven

Feed me now and evermore.

Guide me O Thou...Thou... Thou great Jehovah -

is it "Jehovah" or "Yehovah"?

Feed me now even... Ever, evermore - evermore.

Feed me now and evermore.

Songs of praises, songs of praises I will ever give to thee

I will ever give to thee.

There we go. Not bad, is it?

It's the day of the auditions to find the call centre's finest voice,

and competition fever has hit the sales floors.

# Tell me why are we

# So blind to see

# That the ones we love are you and me? #

Today, Nev must choose the voice to represent his business on the national stage.

OK, I'm looking for confidence,

er, enthusiasm and, er...

what are we looking for?

A bit of clarity.

-Clarity.

-Yeah.

Guiding his decision-making are call centre manager Ben

and Nia from Marketing.

This is the Welsh Call Centre Voice.

Welsh Call Centre Voice, yeah.

So we need a twang of Welsh.

First up, half Greek/Londoner, George.

-How you doing, George?

-Oh, I'm brilliant.

-Are you?

-Yeah.

-That's fantastic.

I haven't been this nervous since I was yay-high to a grasshopper.

You're not nervous?

I bloody... A little bit.

I don't... I don't know the actual tune to this,

so I do apologise about that.

-HE SINGS BADLY:

-# Open now thy crystal fountain

# Whence the healing stream shall flow

# Let the fiery, cloudy pillar

-# Lead me... #

-NEV LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY

Really? Really?

I told you I don't know the tune!

I think you were singing the tune to Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary!

Shut up!

I'm sorry, I'm English, man... This is...

That's where you went wrong.

Yeah...I didn't choose the song.

-Blame your parents. OK. George, thanks very much.

-That's all right.

Well done, George. Thank you for being a good sport.

NEV LAUGHS

He just went with it!

-OK.

-Who's next?

You say when you're ready for me.

Sean, we're ready for you.

Finally.

Go. Pearly whites - let's go.

Open now the crystal fountain

Whence the healing stream shall flow

Let the fiery cloudy pillar

Lead me all my journey through

Strong deliverer, strong deliverer

Be Thou still my strength and shield

Be Thou still my strength and shield.

-Fantastic.

-Thank you.

-Well done.

-Thank you.

That was easy, wasn't it?

I wasn't that nervous actually, I wasn't.

-No.

-I enjoy public speaking because I always talk in the call centre

and no-one listens but I still talk, though.

Everyone says, "All I can hear is Sean.

"Sean, shut up, my customer can hear you".

I go, whatever, it's fine, and it's like...

Sean, piss off.

-Thanks, guys.

-Bye-bye.

Bye, Sean.

OK, Kieran Dorey - you're only reading a sheet of paper...

to a set of knobs in front of you.

Yeah.

-HE SINGS BADLY

-# Guide me, O the great Jehovah

# Pilgrim through this barren land

# I am weak, but Thou art mighty

# Hold me with Thy powerful hand

# Bread of Heaven, bread of Heaven Feed me now and evermore

# Feed me now and evermore. #

Well, you were in tune on the last line,

but that was the best you were singing the whole song.

-Is that it for today?

-Thank you very much. Do the words "piss off" mean anything to you?

-No. Cheers.

-See you, Kieran.

Oh, dear, possibly this is not quite how we want to be represented.

Have we got more this afternoon?

-Yeah, more this afternoon.

-We've got more.

After two weeks in Nev's sales academy,

it's time for the new recruits,

including ladies' favourite hot boy Kristian, to join their teams.

Everybody know which team they're going onto?

I've got five new people joining the team today.

-Yeah.

-Guess who one of them is?

-Who?

-I went to bat for you baby.

I got you that Kristian.

What? The, the, the, the, the...

Merry Christmas, Happy birthday and he's sitting next to you, as well.

Oh, my God!

I found out the team leaders wanted me on their teams -

obviously very flattering, but I don't know whether it was due to

my good sales, or my techniques and stuff like that,

or whether it's because there are people on their team

pestering them, trying to get me over there,

but I'd like to think it's about my sales, really.

Take care. Bye.

These are your neighbours - you've got Alycia,

Mattie... Brains, Paul and the lovely Alex Furby Evans.

Hi.

But having finally got her man,

the usually chatty Alex is lost for words.

Like, at first, really awkward - I turned round

and I had, like, all these new people and he was sitting there

and I was, like, oh, my gosh, really awkward,

because if he knew we all fancied him...

But it's not until later, Alex gets a chance to find out what

she really wants to know about hot boy.

You going to the boxing on Sunday?

-Hm?

-You going to the boxing on Sunday?

I dunno.

You don't know yet?

Are you going to go with Luke?

-Yeah.

-Or with your girlfriend?

No, she lives miles away.

Ah.

She's not going to be down here.

No, I'll go with Luke and I think, er, Tom and all that.

Have you been together for a long time?

-Two years, two-and-a-half years.

-Ah, cute.

HE CHUCKLES

Hi, there, is that Mrs Gilly? Hi, there, my name's Kristian Thomas.

'Alex is very bubbly and lots of fun.'

Very genuine, but I do have a girlfriend,

so she's a bit out of luck there, I'm afraid.

I was a bit, like, disappointed but I'll find another boy!

There's a lot of other people I fancy so it doesn't really bother me too much.

I'll find another husband!

Nev's search for the call centre's finest voice is hotting up.

Even Hayley the tea lady's having a go.

When I tread the verge of Jordan

Bid my anxious fears subside

Death of deaths and hell's destruction

Land me safe on Canaan's side

Songs of praise, songs of praise I will ever give to thee

I will ever give to thee

Bread of Heaven, bread of Heaven

Feed me now and evermore

# Feed me now and evermore. #

-There we are. There we are, yeah.

-THEY CLAP

-Very good.

-Ah, she got the Welsh factor.

-Right.

-Get out, go on, out!

-Ta-ra!

-She's really good.

-You cannot, cannot, cannot be serious.

I'm looking for guidance from the great Jehovah at the moment,

Hayley is winning.

-Hi, guys.

-Hi, Steve, nice tie.

Thank you very much. It was a present.

-It's very nice.

-Really? It's fantastic.

You don't have to stand there with your bollocks dangling on the table.

You can move back and let the light...

Right you are.

-What?

-Oh, dear...

-You looked then, didn't you? You looked!

Oh, God!

-OK.

-Right, pull myself together.

-HE CLEARS THROAT

-Prepare my voice.

# Guide me O Thou great Jehovah

# Pilgrim through this barren land

# I am weak, but Thou art mighty

# Hold me with Thy powerful hand

# Bread of Heaven, bread of Heaven

# Feed me now and evermore

NEV: # Evermore...

# Feed me now and evermore. #

-Beautiful. Beautiful. Thanks, Steve, thanks.

-See you.

-Thanks, Steve.

That is the voice of the Welsh call centre. That's perfect.

Nev seems to have found HIS champion, but not everyone's convinced.

I'm going to get into trouble for saying this,

-but actually, it's a billboard and on the side of a bus campaign, as well...

-Yes.

-..so I think...

What do you think, he's got a face built for radio?

I think, will Steve be the face that they want on the side of a bus?

No, I would suggest it's not his gut that's on the side of the bus...

-No, that's right, that's right.

-It's his face. Yeah.

Hi. Heledd.

Yes, come on in.

I know this is terrible, but I think I'm about to sneeze.

Sneeze, get it out!

This is the worst possible timing. It's gone.

-It has gone, has it?

-Yes, it's gone.

-OK.

We'll wait for a sneeze half-way through.

If you're going to sneeze, wait till the end of a paragraph and have a good sneeze, OK?

Right, OK.

Here we go.

Guide me O Thou great Jehovah

Pilgrim through this barren land

I am weak, but Thou art mighty

Hold me with Thy powerful hand

Bread of Heaven, bread of Heaven,

Feed me now and evermore

Feed me now and evermore.

Well done, excellent.

Great.

I would, you know, that was average to shit hot.

-Thanks. See you!

-SHE LAUGHS

This person's got to represent the company at The Voice Of The Welsh Call Centre.

This is important - we've got to win.

We've done well, there - they've come forward, they all had a bash,

it was... It was good.

I think we could give it to anyone of four or five,

but I've got the unenviable task of picking one...

so I'd better get on with it.

How you getting on here?

How many have we got?

How many have we got? Well done.

How many have we got?

In the past six years, Nev's call centre has grown

from eight staff and three desks to 700 staff filling 230 desks.

Nev believes his success is down to the call centre's unique atmosphere.

Just there - bang it in the goal. Go ahead.

Erm, to an outsider who walks in for the first time, I mean,

it could look a little bit nuts.

It may look like a holiday camp, but there is a method in the madness and it does work,

and if you get people to feel a part of it, buy into it,

you're not constantly looking for new staff every two weeks,

which is what you'd have if they were just left through the drudgery

of ringing and ringing and ringing

and getting the phone put down on them again and again and again.

..so you know you get letters...

all they do is...

I'm sorry, something just came through the roof in the office!

If you wouldn't have the fun, then people would, would leave,

they wouldn't stay around so long.

GIRL SQUEALS

That energy that you get from the call centre,

and you feel the buzz as soon as you open that door and come in -

a lot of companies out there would wish they could bottle that

and transfer it into their workplace.

Nev's even set up a band to harness all of his young talent.

OK, I'm there!

This is the reunification of The Dialists,

one of the best bands in the world.

# Darling you've got to let me know

# Should I stay or should I go? #

Tonight, he's trying out a new lead singer, aspiring rock chick,

Ania Rushton.

Ania's probably the most nuts person I've got here, erm,

and we've got some nuts people here...but Ania takes the biscuit.

'I don't know, I think people think, oh, Ania wants all the limelight,'

but I don't... For some reason, that's the way I come across.

I'm going on holiday in January...

I suppose it could be like having Gazza in your football team -

you don't know quite what he's going to do,

but when he's on his game he's brilliant -

when he's on the pop, he's a disaster.

I've gotta tell you, the first time out of the blocks,

-no rehearsals at all,

-Excuse me...

That was good, no, the band was good, that was rocking -

that, that's sounding good.

We've booked an assessment with you for your free insulation in your loft and your cavities.

My job is to make sure you take advantage of your entitlement before it comes to an end.

24-year-old Ania has been at the call centre for six months -

she's one of Nev's rising stars.

I'm a really good seller. I've been top seller for the last two weeks again.

I was top seller when I first started here.

Hi, my name is Ania Rushton - I'm one of the local grants advisors

for the area there in Horsham.

I've been asked to give you a call to let you know

that your property there on 8E9 Heathway qualifies to be

insulated in the walls and the loft.

But like many hotshots, Ania has an unpredictable streak.

It's the first sort of commitment I've ever had.

I had a wild past cos I used to hang around with the wrong people

who didn't have no respect for themselves.

I don't think I had any rules when I was younger. It's a bit like...

I didn't really go to school that much, properly or anything.

She's scatty, she's off the wall, she's effervescent,

she's enthusiastic.

However, there's underlying problems there, as well,

which sometimes cause her to, er, go AWOL or you know,

a little bit astray - little bit of er, throwing tantrums,

but, er, that, that's Ania, welcome to her world.

I've been a nightmare here.

I don't know how I've lasted so long cos I am very hard to manage.

Ania's attendance record has recently plummeted,

and her manager's losing patience.

If I knew exactly what was happening with Ania I'd be a very happy man,

but the truth of the matter is,

I've got no idea what goes on in Ania's world.

She can be a top seller,

but then the following day she just won't turn up.

She wouldn't get away with it in most businesses.

Should she lose her job

if she doesn't turn up for work? Well, then, I'd say yes.

It's not a personal thing - if anyone doesn't turn up to work for

an extended period of time, they, in any job, in any walk of life, you're

sooner or later going to lose that job, and who do you blame for that?

Yourself.

You might be entitled to have quite a substantial amount of money,

so was there any reason why you're not interested?

-'I'm scared, to be honest.'

-I understa...

-LINE GOES DEAD

-Hello?

Nev is trying to find a date for sales agent, George,

who's been on a six-year losing streak.

Nev almost set George up with another one of his employees, Lisa,

but Lisa's now fallen for new recruit and up-and-coming rugby player, Sean,

and she's clearly enjoying the thrill of the chase.

Let's go, Sean.

Step!

Higher, Sean, higher. Faster!

Look at the bum in the shorts.

Right, Sean, when you get back to the corner now, burpee on the corner.

Two burpees.

I love giving a man a good workout.

Next time, I'll push him a bit harder, definitely.

Sprint, sprint, sprint, sprint, sprint, sprint!

With Lisa now spoken for, George is back to square one, but going

the extra mile to help his employees is a key element of Nev's management style,

so he's searching the sales floor for George's perfect woman.

I need a nice female - somebody nice to go on a date with George.

-I've got a dilemma.

-Yes.

Lisa has let me down badly -

she was going on a date with George, but now she's fallen in love

with somebody else, right, so George hasn't had a date in six years.

I'm going for the sympathy vote on this one.

I'm not going on a date with him, I'm not going on a date with him.

Grace, bugger off, you've been three fifths of bloody useless.

Most bosses wouldn't ask things like that.

I'd rather just be honest and say I don't want to

go on a date with someone if I don't, if I don't know them.

George hasn't had a date for six years.

He's a lovely man - a lovely, lovely, lovely man.

Right, so you're trying to get him a date?

A lovely, lovely man.

-Right.

-Do you like pizza?

-Yeah.

-Fancy a date with George?

No!

All right. Thanks, Mel, you were crap.

Ah, thanks, Nev.

-Goodbye.

-Bye!

I suppose a lot of the girls in the call centre are a little bit

flamboyant for George.

You know, he is introverted and, er, and somewhat geeky.

Having heard about Alex's recent romantic disappointment,

Nev seeks to kill two birds with one stone.

-What about George, then?

-Well, he's lovely, but...

-I'll big you up to him.

-Why, does he fancy me?

-No, he's just desperate.

-Ah!

He's a nice guy and he hasn't had a date for six years,

-so we thought we'd try and set him up on a date.

-I know how that feels.

-Do you?

-Yeah.

-Oh, that's nice, cos you know, you're a nice girl, he's a nice lad.

-Oh...

-Well, Grace said you were a nice girl.

-Yeah...

-Yeah, you'll have a date with George?

-Yeah.

-We've got a date for George!

They're trying to find a date for George - I said I'll go on a date with him.

He hasn't had a date in six years, and I was, like, oh, I feel sorry for him cos I know what it's like

cos I haven't been on a date with anyone for ages and I was, like,

oh, maybe, cos I feel sorry for him.

He is really nice, George is, bless him.

You on a call, George?

No, just finished, just finished.

-Come and have a chat then.

-Yeah, of course.

It is a fact that if someone is a good seller, they'll probably be more

successful with the opposite sex - that they'll have the confidence,

for a start, to go up and start chatting somebody up...

They know how to close the deal, you know, they'll, er, they'll sell themselves.

So you've got all your chat-up lines organised?

Well, yeah, yeah.

I've got some chat-up lines.

Come on, give me some chat-up lines, then.

Erm... I think you're nice.

-I think... You know, you look good.

-Hm?

I think you look good.

Sound sincere as you're saying it, George.

Twe, we need help over here.

George has got one chat-up line, right?

And what's that?

"You look good".

Well, it's honesty.

Yeah.

How far do you think he'll go on that one chat-up line?

I think you need...

Well, it's like a conversation - like a sales pitch, ain't it?

In your introduction, the last thing you want to do is

talk at the customer, that would be a one-way conversation.

-Yeah.

-You're good at sales.

Just take what you've learnt from a sales environment to a personal environment.

What, turn round to them and go, hi, my name's George, I work at We Claim You Gain?

You could, but you're not selling... You're selling the product there - you've got to sell yourself.

What do girls want to talk about? The off-side rule.

What if they're not interested in that, though?

-Oh, they will be.

-Yeah, all girls are interested in the off-side rule,

that's all you hear them talking about in any pubs and bars and somewhere like that, seriously.

-You don't want to be talking shopping.

-That and car engines.

Yeah, car engines, car engines.

Yeah, seriously, it's a good point of conversation.

-Yeah. OK.

-I think you're pretty cool, anyway, George.

-Thank you.

-I think you know what you're doing, really - it's just, er,

held under a facade of NOT knowing what you're doing.

I suppose it's confidence, at the end of the day.

-That's all it is.

-Yeah.

With George fully prepped, Nev takes him to meet his date, Alex.

Alex...

Alex, stand up. Stand up!

ALEX LAUGHS

Come on - group hug! Yes!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

-So, erm, we're going on a date.

-Are we?

We are going on... Well, not me - I don't want to join your date.

We're going on a date to Nando's, aren't we?

Can you exchange numbers, then, so we know what we're doing?

Oh, she's hot - oh, she's hot. She's beautiful, she's proper beautiful.

Oh, thank you!

I think George is... is probably erm, ecstatic.

Alex, I'm not so sure - maybe now having seen her date,

she's having second thoughts already.

However, there's a free Nando's in it for her and, erm, who knows? It might work.

Did you want to give him a snog to send him on his way?

Pardon?!

I said, did you want to give George a snog to send him on his way?

No!

No, I think she wants to wait until after I've had a shave.

-George the Stud has got a date.

-George the Stud!

A week after the auditions to find the call centre's finest voice,

a decision has been reached.

We're going to appoint Heledd as the voice of our call centre.

It's a full grant, as well, a cavity wall insulation.

She's got to go on the back of a bus -

at least she doesn't look like the back of a bus,

whereas, you know, a few of them did, you know, let's be fair.

I think, er, she's got a fantastic voice... I'd buy from her.

Every time, I don't know, there's something about Heledd's voice

that just soothes me - just listen to that voice.

And then the, er, the cement that fills the hole...

-Superb.

-..is pigmented...

She never gets distracted, either. She just goes with the flow.

She's got the lovely, soft Welsh lilt to her voice,

so we're going to opt for Heledd and, erm, hope for the best.

Obviously, I don't like losing anything.

If I wanted to win and I knew about it before, I would have

full-on revised it, I would have SANG Bread Of Heaven.

Because I only had a day, I'm happy with what I...

I'm happy with, er,

what I did within a day of knowing I was doing it. Do you get me?

I was really, really disappointed because I do think I've got

a really nice, natural, flair to my voice and things like that,

but, erm, it doesn't really stop me having faith in myself,

obviously, because I do know I'm quite good on the phone...

When one door closes, another door opens, that's what I always say.

For Heledd, being in the spotlight is nothing new.

'I do enjoy performing.'

When I was about 18, I got a part in Pobol y Cwm, which is

the Welsh language national soap opera,

and I was in that for a good six or seven years on and off, with a few breaks.

I get a real buzz out of it.

-Hiya!

-Hiya!

The final round in the competition is a telephone interview.

PHONE RINGS

-Hello.

-'Hi, is that Heledd?'

It is - hello, there.

Hi, it's Dan calling here from Buzz Wales.

-Hi, Dan.

-'Well done for making it to the short list of finalists.'

Thanks very much!

I had to write a 300-word erm, application, I suppose,

explaining why I deserve to be the voice of call centres in Wales...

SHE LAUGHS

Erm... And so I did it in the form of a poem - a really terrible poem.

A point of contact, loud and clear

The natural chat and a voice in the ear

It's all in the telling and the ringing and the selling

The dialling and the smiling that we're hard wired to hear

Communicate, articulate, motivate and explicate,

The urgency intoxicates the goal is drawing near

In local calls and national, were passionate and adaptable

We live for the talking so we talk for a living

It's a rush, it's a buzz, to use your gob in your career.

'Yeah, OK, so we'll be in touch - thanks for your time.'

-Thank you for your time. Thanks very much - nice talking to you.

-'And you, all the best. Bye.'

Bye-bye. Bye.

Somebody told me that, apparently,

if you win, then your face gets on a bus.

I don't like the idea of that, but, erm,

it's all good for a laugh, isn't it?

You know, and it's good for the company so I guess,

yeah, winning would be all right.

Ania is continuing to struggle with very poor attendance,

but despite her unreliability,

Nev is bending over backwards to keep his star seller in the fold.

I've had loads of time off at the minute so he gave me flexitime.

Flexitime basically means that if you lose a day, rather than

giving you a disciplinary for it,

you just ring in and say you're giving your flexitime

so they don't have to sack me and I don't have to be in the predicament of getting sacked.

We try and help anybody that's got a problem, erm,

try and be a father-like figure to them.

But there's a reason behind Ania's unpredictable nature.

I have really wild anxiety - I've had it all my life,

from when I was younger,

to only lately I've been trying to sort it out,

so I need to be in the right place to sort it out,

so I'm just, yeah, I'm enjoying me journey of sorting it out

because I'm definitely getting through it -

I'm going to counselling, I'm just sort of fishing through what's the matter with me,

cos I just keep having bad anxiety to the point where I can't sleep

and things, I feel like everything's going to come to an end.

As well as flexitime,

Nev has come up with another cunning rouse to keep Ania on the straight and narrow

and plans to tell her after tonight's band practice.

JAZZ MUSIC PLAYS

'You've got to try a disciplinary route on it,

'but on the flip side of that,

'you want to help Ania and get her, her through her problematic time'

that she's in, and put a new song in her mouth, you know, just,

just get her head up and make her realise that life's good and get on.

With one of his tea ladies about to go on holiday, Nev thinks

a less pressured job might give Ania space to sort out her problems.

Tea lady for the next two weeks.

Er, yeah, I'm well up for that, giving the tea out, living the dream.

Yeah. You're promoted to tea lady on NES -

it don't get better than that, does it? Dizzy heights.

Been demoted more like.

No, no, a service, a service provider.

-OK, OK. Thank you.

-Thank you, Ania, you're a good egg.

I want to do my best for this company and when I am on form,

obviously, I'm a really good seller, but at the minute I'm not on form,

so it's really nice that he said to be a tea lady

and...whoopy-do, that'll give me a bit of time out, won't it?

-Hiya, Steff.

-Hiya.

I believe you're going to train me today?

I am indeed.

Well done.

Agh!

It's time for the aspiring rock chick to strut her stuff on the tea round.

-Here we go, babe.

-Cheers, An.

# Service with a smile... #

Hello, hot boy. I'm joking!

Some people like it really strong with a tiny bit of milk,

some people like it with loads of milk.

All right?

Try it, though. Out of ten?

-Eight.

-Oh...

It was nice but I couldn't distinguish whether it was actually

tea or coffee, for a start,

and it had bits round the outside of the mug.

-Is there sugar in these?

-No.

That'll do, then.

She makes a better cup of tea than Steff.

-Do I?

-Yeah, miles better.

-Yeah!

Nev's unorthodox plan seems to be doing the trick.

I'm really enjoying my first day, obviously, erm, I've had a good laugh,

everyone seems really nice, so, yeah, I enjoyed it.

'I'll recap - I got a letter from the Housing Association

'saying that I've got to pay £5.75 a week towards the rent.'

The scheme replaces inefficient boilers

with 100% funding if you qualify.

'It's a new one, so I think it should be OK, thank you.'

Ah, right, that's fine, can I just ask you, erm,

roughly when it was replaced for you?

-LINE GOES DEAD

-Hello?

'I'll tell you what, I'm going to start F-ing and blinding at you in a moment - piss off.'

George might have bombed out of the voice competition,

but at least he has a date to look forward to.

I might just go up to her and say, how do you fancy, for example,

Harvester - if I decide to go with that, I'd say,

"What do you think of Harvester?"

If she says yes, it's yes, if she says no,

plan B, and it will be Pizza Express.

Hopefully, she won't say no to both of them,

because if she does, I'm... I'll be, erm...

..up the creek without a paddle.

Nev is planning to announce the good news at his weekly staff meeting.

Is Alex up there? Where's Alex?

Blonde Alex.

I dunno, I just felt like I was kind of put on the spot a bit

and I felt like I couldn't say no and Nev was, like, will you do it?

And I was, like, oh, OK, then, but, erm,

-I dunno, I didn't realise, it was proper...

-Do you feel bad?

Yeah, I dunno... I'll, you know, speak to him, just stay friends with him, you know...

Yeah, just say to him, like, say you like someone else

and you don't want to hurt his feelings by going on a date with someone else.

No, I'll just be honest.

I think... Oh, God, I don't know what Nev's going to say to me!

Imagine if he sacks me, I'd cry. No, he's not going to sack me for that.

News of Alex's no-show has reached Nev.

Tell her she's sacked, then. I mean it!

She committed to a date with George and if she's gypping out,

she's out, all right?

Is that right?

I've sacked people for not singing before now -

why couldn't I sack her for that?

No, it's, erm, I wouldn't have sacked her for that, no.

The search for the perfect or... No,

the search for a woman will have to continue for now.

Erm...

Yes, it's just going to have to continue, to be honest.

There's plenty of other women in here that I like.

As I turn round, there's no women in the whole flaming place

at the moment, so now I look like a bit of an arse.

Sales agents from nearly 200 Welsh call centres

competed to become the ultimate Voice Of Wales,

and after much anticipation, the result is in.

Guys, can I ask everybody to make those their last calls, quickly?

We've got some very, very good news for the call centre.

If I could just have Heledd come stand up by me, sweetheart.

This... This young lady right here has won The Voice Of Wales.

APPLAUSE

Oh, no, really?!

Yeah, and is the official Voice Of Wales for next year!

Absolutely fantastic.

APPLAUSE

Someone's going to draw...

They're going to draw a cock on me head, or something, you watch.

That's what's going to happen.

A picture of me on the side of a bus with a cock on me head.

That's what's going to happen.

-Congratulations on winning the voice.

-Thank you.

-Are you pleased?

I'm very pleased, yeah, I'm still a little bit stunned,

I still can't quite believe it.

-Yeah.

-Because I didn't expect to win, you know?

No. Do you have any major concerns about

your portrait being on the back of a bus, in case somebody draws...

Yeah.

..a dick on your head?

-Well, it happened to Carrie Bradshaw.

-Did it?

Yeah, it did, yeah, so I was a bit worried.

Who's Carrie Bradshaw?

She, ah, she's the main character in Sex And The City.

When would I watch Sex In The City, now, Heledd?

All right, OK, well... anyway, yeah.

And you worry that might happen to you as The Voice Of Welsh Call Centres?

Yeah, I am because if it was somebody else, you see, that's what I would do.

SHE LAUGHS

It's a major, major coup for us as a call centre, erm,

to have somebody that looks like the back of a bus - no, sorry,

somebody's face on the back of a bus, that was it.

-Anyway, congratulations on winning The Voice.

-Thank you.

It's been a week since Ania was made tea lady,

but her poor attendance has become unmanageable.

We tried to accommodate her in any way we could, but, er,

failed miserably.

You've still got to have some form of reliability, you know -

turning up for six hours a week, it's bending the rules too much -

it's not so much that, erm,

that I let her go, it's that she said, look Nev, I'm letting you down

all the time and I can't do it, that in itself is stressing me out.

She couldn't do it. She just couldn't do it.

Poor old Ania.

DIALLING TONE

'Your call can't be taken at the moment and you cannot leave a message.'

-'Hello?'

-Hello there, is this a Mr Ramabam?

I think George, first and foremost, is going to be fine.

He's going to be OK, er... He would have learnt lessons,

he's starting to come out of himself and he will get better and better and more confident as the years go on.

Erm, whether I'm taking the Mickey out of him

or pushing him along or kicking him along, he's doing OK.

-Come on in, are you all right?

-Yeah, good - how are you?

-Park your arse.

-Cheers.

Um... NEV CLEARS THROAT

Yeah, unfortunately all our campaign of, you know,

"Date George" amounted to the square root of zip.

-Sorry, George, but...

-Ah, no worries.

Just dust it off. Just remember,

it's like sales, right? You've got to take rejection now and again.

Somebody slams the phone down on you, somebody's rude to you -

SWSWSWN - same as girlfriend - some will, some won't, so what, next.

-Yeah, yeah.

-You'll be fine.

-Yeah.

-All right?

Nev is forced to use some strong arm tactics.

-Somebody say go.

-Go!

Lost to a 53-year-old.

..the high rollers are backed into a corner...

Shirt, trousers, shoes - get them on.

..tea girl Hayley has a point to prove...

I've bought absolutely everything.

Cheap shit just to get people steaming.

This is how I own it.

..and the call centre football team have a score to settle.

CHEERING

Get out! Out! Get off! Get off!

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd