Episode 5 Broken


Episode 5

Drama series. Father Michael has to mediate when Helen's devout brother, Daniel, clashes violently with her gay neighbour, Carl, as all try to come to terms with Vernon's death.


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Transcript


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-I changed my plans, Michael. Worried you might intervene.

-How is she?

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Not good. She won't tell you that, but she's not good.

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I'm scared there's no Heaven. Death is just the end.

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-And I'm scared of that end.

-So, how's the flashbacks going?

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Flash-forwards, these days.

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It's purgatory, people telling each other bitter truths.

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You made me a self-loathing wreck!

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And the phone rang.

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Helen Oyenusi about Vernon.

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I didn't pick up. A few hours later, he was dead.

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They won't let me see him.

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Some police officers in my parish have... They've killed a young man.

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They're all colluding, protecting the officers responsible.

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I'd like to bury my son.

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This programme contains some strong language

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# Broken windows in empty hallways

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# A pale dead moon in a sky streaked with grey

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# Human kindness is overflowing

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# And I think it's gonna rain...

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# Today. #

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I'm going to sprinkle Roz's coffin with holy water now.

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To remind us of her baptism.

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Jesus said to her,

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"I am the resurrection and the life.

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"Whoever believes in me shall live, even in death.

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"And whoever lives and believes in me shall never die."

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Eternal rest grant unto her, oh, Lord.

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And let perpetual light shine upon her.

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May she rest in peace.

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Amen.

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May her soul and the souls of all the faithful departed,

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through the mercy of God, rest in peace.

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Amen.

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WOMAN CRIES

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-May I scrounge a lift from you?

-Yes.

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She was never religious.

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No?

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No. HE LAUGHS

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So how did you meet?

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She came to see me.

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To tell you what she decided to do?

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I can't tell you that, Chloe.

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Did she talk about us?

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Oh, yes.

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She said she loved you very much. You and the boys.

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It didn't stop her, though, did it?

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-Didn't her letter explain it all?

-No.

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That was all about how much she loved us.

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Do you think she wanted you to talk her out of it?

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Perhaps.

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Did you try?

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Yes, I tried very hard.

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I'm going to pay it all back.

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-Oh... No-one expects that of you.

-I expect it of me.

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It'll take me years, but I'm going to pay it all back.

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Every penny.

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Thanks very much. I appreciate it. Hiya.

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Chloe says she's going to pay it all back.

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Do you know how much?

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Yeah, just over 230,000, I think she said.

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Yeah.

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The night she told me...

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I couldn't sleep.

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I was so angry.

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And now if you pay me it back, I'd...burn it.

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She lost it all on the machines?

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Yeah.

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Well, that helps.

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I thought she robbed me because she could, but...

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-she did it because she had to.

-Yeah. She did.

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They're all in a pension scheme at work.

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Lump sum on death.

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And death in service pays double.

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Oh, the irony, Father.

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In life, she lost it all.

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In death, she hit the jackpot.

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-You don't need to reproach yourself about it.

-You want to bet?

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No pun intended.

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I told her I was phoning the police. That's what did it.

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Look, she'd resolved to kill herself weeks before.

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It was the shame that did it.

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What you said, it...didn't make any difference.

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I want to believe that so much.

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It's the truth.

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It's the truth.

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Thank you.

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Yeah, take care.

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It's cold.

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Right. We'll see if she's in.

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You all right?

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Hey, love...

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I'm sorry to bother you.

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-Are you a friend of Helen's?

-I'm her brother.

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Oh, lovely to meet you.

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I'm Carl. I live just across the road.

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I'm so sorry for your loss.

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Have you come far?

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Trinidad.

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Well, I won't keep you.

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Would you mind passing these on to Helen for me?

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Tell her I've been meaning to call over for ages,

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but I didn't like to intrude.

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You can't get anything like these around here.

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I had to go all the way into town to get them.

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Gladioli.

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Flamboyant rather than garish, I feel.

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Boys, take your luggage and go and stand by the door.

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-Why?

-Why?

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Boys, luggage.

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I hope she likes them.

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You can leave them there with the rest.

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-Well, I was hoping perhaps that you could...

-There is fine.

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Maybe I'll just leave it for now, then.

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Are you well, Michael?

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Me? Yeah.

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You seemed troubled...at mass.

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Helen!

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Oh!

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SHE SCREAMS

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They were sending him home.

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He was "the least unwell", they said.

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Michael said, "Least unwell isn't well,"

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and they agreed...

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..but they needed his bed for someone a lot worse than him.

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So he came home.

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And he got worse and worse.

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He asked me to phone Michael,

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and I did, but Michael was asleep in bed...

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So I phoned the crisis team.

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If I hadn't done that, he'd be alive today...

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The crisis team came, but Vernon had the chain on the door

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and he put the knife to his throat

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and he said he'd kill himself before he let them in.

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So they phoned the police.

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Why they did that, I don't understand,

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and the police came and...

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Where was he shot?

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There.

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No.

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Where in his body?

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In his heart.

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KNOCKING

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I'll get it.

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KNOCKING

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KNOCKING

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What's going on?

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Just need a quick word about those boys of yours.

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-Yes?

-One of them pushed the other against my door.

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When I asked them to move, they shouted abuse at me.

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-Abuse?

-Called me a queer, to be precise.

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Now, look, I'm pushing 50,

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I can do without this kind of crap on my own doorstep, yeah?

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You approached my sons?

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I asked them to move, yes.

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Did you touch them?

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Of course I didn't. What are you implying?

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Don't go anywhere near my sons again, you hear me?

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Well, it's no wonder they carry on like that, if that's your attitude.

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What do you expect? They're children.

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I expect an apology.

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No.

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For them to apologise, they'd have to talk to you,

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and my children will have nothing to do with the likes of you.

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-The likes of me?

-Yes.

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What do you mean by that?

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You know exactly what I mean.

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I'm gay, is that what you're saying?

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I don't really recognise that word.

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I'm gay, therefore your boys can call me queer.

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Fine, so next time I see you in the street I can call you nigger, yeah?

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Bye.

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What did you just say?

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I said they call me queer, I call you...

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Hey, Daniel! What the hell's going on?

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Ask him.

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Are you OK?

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What was all that about?

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What did you say to him?

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Hey, are you all right?

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You need to put something on that. Some frozen peas.

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I don't need your advice, thank you very much.

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Nothing to say for yourselves?

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I mean, what the hell do you think you're playing at?

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Get upstairs and get out of my sight.

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I don't want to hear from you!

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What's going on?

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Nothing, Helen.

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Come on, let's go inside.

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Hello. Can we come in?

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Yeah.

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He's coming home?

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Sorry?

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Vernon. He's coming home?

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Mrs Oyenusi, we're so sorry for your loss

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and we offer our heartfelt condolences,

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but we're not here about Vernon.

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So why are you here?

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Are you Mrs Oyenusi's brother?

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Yes.

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Could I take your name please, sir?

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Daniel. Daniel Martin.

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And how are you spelling that?

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M-A-R-T-I-N. Why?

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Mr Martin, we've received a complaint that you assaulted

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a man just outside at roughly 2.15 this afternoon.

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What are you talking about?

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Is this a joke?

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We wouldn't joke about something as serious as this.

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Serious?

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Sir, the man alleges it was a homophobic attack. A hate crime.

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If found guilty of a hate crime, you will go to prison, sir.

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Yes, sir. Very serious.

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More serious than the killing of a black teenager by white police officers?

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I see what you're doing here, officer.

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You've killed a young man,

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therefore discredit him and all his family, yeah?

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Did you assault Carl McKenna, sir?

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Carl!

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He came here hurling racist abuse, but I did not assault him.

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Carl wouldn't do that.

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He says you witnessed it, Father. It is Father, is it?

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Yeah, Michael will do.

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What did you see, Michael?

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I'll need some time to think about that.

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-Time?

-Yeah.

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It's a very simple thing, Michael. Just tell us what you saw.

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-Simple?

-Yeah.

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Lots of officers witnessed Vernon's death,

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yet not one of them has said what they saw.

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Why is that, if it's so simple?

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How long will you need to think about it?

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I don't know, a day or two.

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KNOCKING

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Hello again.

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What do you want?

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Frozen peas. Put them on the pain.

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Wrap them in a cloth first or they'll stick to it.

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You've had direct experience, have you?

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Yeah.

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Before I was a priest, I was a professional gobshite.

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Quite a few people took a swing at me.

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I'm Michael.

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Carl. What can I do for you, Michael?

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Can I come in?

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It's not the Ritz.

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Oh, I don't mind.

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MUSIC PLAYS

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Quentin Crisp says after the third year the dust doesn't get any worse.

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I live in hope.

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Oh, listen. Get out, you, will you?

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Sorry. Have a seat, Father. Let me turn that off.

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Ah, thanks.

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Would you like a drink? A cup of tea, or anything...?

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No, no, I'm fine. Thank you.

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Brenda.

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My mum.

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Forgive me, Father, it's the only thing that stops

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my poor little nerves from jangling since she passed.

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I'm not ready to let go of her just yet, you know?

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Yeah, some people never scatter the ashes.

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Others find it helps them let go.

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I smoked some.

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Sorry?

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When they first came back, I sprinkled a tiny bit into a spliff.

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I was beside myself,

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I hoped it would make her a part of me forever, you know?

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But I've since read very little of the body remains,

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so the only thing I got inside me was oak veneer.

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It'll be three months on Thursday.

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The dreaded C word.

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I never knew it was possible to miss someone so much.

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I'm 49 years of age, I've never left home.

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We did everything together.

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What do you want?

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I want to talk to you about this afternoon.

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Why?

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Well, I want to hear your side of the story.

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I have to go to the shops.

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I'll tell it to you on the way, OK?

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I love it here. I cut through most days.

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Just look at that stonework.

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It's sublime, isn't it?

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Catacomb!

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Catacomb.

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Did you ever hear such a terrifying word in your entire life?

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Catacomb.

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I first saw him getting out of a cab outside Helen's.

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I approached him and I asked him to pass on some flowers to her,

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but he refused.

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He didn't give an explanation.

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He didn't have to.

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Homophobia can be very subtle like that, you know? You just know.

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Yeah.

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Then a few hours later, his boys were messing about outside my door

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and one of them pushed the other against it, so I went out

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and I asked them, politely, to move further down the street.

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They called me a queer and ran off, laughing.

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So I knocked at Helen's, and I told him what happened.

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Now, instead of reprimanding them, he warned me

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never to approach his children again, like I'm some kind of a...

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-Yeah.

-You know.

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When I realised there was no apology forthcoming, I couldn't help myself.

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I turned around to him and I told him, I said, yeah,

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maybe when I see you walking down the street I might feel compelled

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-to call you by a certain name and see how you like it.

-Yeah.

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It was at that point that you entered stage left

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for the dramatic finale.

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Look, there's never any justification for violence,

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but that family, they've already suffered so much.

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You don't have to tell me, Father.

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What those bastards - excuse my French - did to poor Vernon.

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That was unforgivable.

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He was a good lad. He always gave me the time of day.

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Look, I'm not trying to make excuses for him,

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but he'd just arrived on a very long flight

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from a totally different culture,

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he was jet-lagged, grieving...

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I'm grieving, I don't go round punching innocent people in the face.

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Entrez.

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What are you doing?

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Sorry, Father, but I'm gaggin'. My nerves...

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I don't really think you should be...doing that here.

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What else do you think phone boxes are for these days?

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Oh, someone's been on the beak here.

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Cocaine.

0:21:110:21:13

So what made you become a priest?

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Oh, please tell me it was sunbeams through the window,

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bathing you in iridescent light, and the sound of heavenly choirs...

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If only it had been that obvious.

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Don't mind me, I watch too many films.

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Are you celibate?

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Yes.

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I am, too - not by choice, I can tell you.

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Are you allowed to have a wank?

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HE LAUGHS

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I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked.

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I've often wondered but I've never had the chance to ask until now.

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Let's face it, it's not every day you find yourself skinning up

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with a Catholic priest in a public phone box now, is it?

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The church teaches that any sexual activity outside marriage is wrong.

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I'll take that as a yes, then, shall I?

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Mind the cat now.

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The cat never took a liking to me.

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The only reason I look after the bastard is for Brenda.

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Thanks very much, I enjoyed that.

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Yeah.

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Do you sleep down here?

0:23:030:23:04

Hmm?

0:23:040:23:06

I said, do you sleep down here?

0:23:060:23:08

I don't really like going upstairs since Brenda passed.

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Besides, it's freezing up there and I've got no gas.

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How do you mean?

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They've got me on one of these pre-paid meter things, you know.

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But it's not worth putting anything on it.

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Why not?

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Cos I owe them a fortune,

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so if I put a tenner on the key they take most of it back straight away

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and then shit's run out again before you know it...

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But it's been perishing.

0:23:330:23:34

You wouldn't believe the heat that little beauty gives out.

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So how... How do you do your cooking?

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I don't.

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Well, look, I can't do anything about your gas,

0:23:450:23:48

but I can arrange vouchers for the food bank

0:23:480:23:51

if you ever felt you needed...

0:23:510:23:53

What?

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You think I don't know what this is really about?

0:23:540:23:57

You want me to forget everything, don't you?

0:24:000:24:04

Yeah.

0:24:040:24:05

Helen's going through hell right now.

0:24:050:24:08

-I know.

-This is the last thing she needs.

-I know.

0:24:080:24:11

He's come over to ease her grief, but he's adding to it.

0:24:110:24:13

I know. I'm more than happy to forget everything, Michael.

0:24:130:24:16

Well, thank you, Carl, thank you. I appreciate that.

0:24:170:24:20

The moment he comes over here and shakes my hand, it's all forgotten.

0:24:200:24:25

All right, thanks.

0:24:310:24:33

Shake his hand?

0:24:460:24:47

Father, I'm disappointed you would even suggest such a thing.

0:24:490:24:53

I just think for the sake of...

0:24:530:24:54

Have you forgotten what he called me?

0:24:540:24:57

Daniel, would it be so hard to swallow your pride just this once?

0:24:570:25:01

Helen, this isn't about pride, this is about what is right.

0:25:010:25:04

I'm sure if you actually spoke to Carl

0:25:040:25:06

you'd be able to find some common ground.

0:25:060:25:08

He's grieving too. He only lost his mother a few months back.

0:25:080:25:12

Are you seriously comparing his grief to what we are going through?

0:25:130:25:17

No! No, of course not, I'm just saying...

0:25:170:25:19

-Father, my sister has lost her only son...

-Yes.

0:25:190:25:24

..I have lost my nephew

0:25:240:25:26

and the only thing we care about right now is bringing Vernon home.

0:25:260:25:30

Everything else is totally irrelevant,

0:25:300:25:32

so as far as I am concerned, that man can go to hell.

0:25:320:25:36

-Oh!

-He's got a strike!

0:25:520:25:55

Is he going to snatch victory out of the jaws of defeat?

0:25:550:25:57

-It helps to go halfway down the alley, doesn't it?

-Bollocks!

0:25:570:26:00

Any closer, you could have pushed 'em over.

0:26:000:26:02

-Hey! My foot was behind that line.

-Were it shite.

-It were!

0:26:020:26:05

What do we do if it's a foul throw?

0:26:050:26:07

-Were it a foul?

-Yes!

0:26:070:26:09

-No, it was not. It was not.

-He's cheated.

0:26:090:26:11

He has to feel sorry for his opponents,

0:26:110:26:14

up against a man at the peak of his power.

0:26:140:26:19

We'll never hear the last of this, now.

0:26:190:26:21

There's people on the pitch.

0:26:210:26:23

We're watching your feet.

0:26:230:26:25

Yeah. They think it's all over...

0:26:250:26:28

Over that line, it's a foul.

0:26:280:26:29

-Oh, it's bang-on.

-Oh, no!

0:26:290:26:32

-It is now!

-Bloody hell!

0:26:320:26:34

Bloody hellfire!

0:26:340:26:36

I can't believe it!

0:26:360:26:38

Can you believe that?

0:26:380:26:39

Behold the Lamb of God,

0:26:550:26:58

behold him who takes away the sins of the world.

0:26:580:27:03

Blessed are those called to the supper of the lamb.

0:27:030:27:06

-BOTH:

-Lord, I am not worthy

0:27:080:27:10

that you should enter under my roof,

0:27:100:27:14

but only say the word and my soul shall be healed.

0:27:140:27:21

The body of Christ.

0:27:380:27:39

The blood of Christ.

0:27:590:28:02

Amen.

0:28:020:28:03

Oh, Mam.

0:28:390:28:43

Oh, Mam!

0:28:470:28:49

KNOCKING

0:28:590:29:01

Open that door! I know you're in there!

0:29:010:29:04

Come on, open the door,

0:29:040:29:06

I can't be standing on this doorstep all day and night!

0:29:060:29:09

Come on! Open up! I want my money.

0:29:090:29:13

I saw him go in there!

0:29:130:29:17

Come on!

0:29:170:29:18

Oh, hello.

0:29:400:29:42

Do you want to come through?

0:29:430:29:45

You're not used to this?

0:29:590:30:00

It's how it is these days.

0:30:020:30:05

I could turn the chair around, face that way.

0:30:050:30:08

We could go elsewhere, somewhere traditional.

0:30:100:30:13

Please.

0:30:130:30:14

Right. Follow me.

0:30:180:30:21

You go in there. I go in here.

0:30:330:30:35

Is that better?

0:30:430:30:45

Yes, thank you.

0:30:450:30:47

I confess to Almighty God, to Blessed Mary Ever Virgin,

0:30:500:30:55

to Blessed Michael the Archangel,

0:30:550:30:58

to the Holy Apostles Peter and Paul,

0:30:580:31:01

to all the Saints and to you, my Father,

0:31:010:31:04

that I have sinned exceedingly in thought, word and deed.

0:31:040:31:08

Through my fault. Through my fault.

0:31:080:31:11

Through my most grievous fault.

0:31:110:31:13

Father?

0:31:200:31:21

May God help you to confess your sins with true sorrow.

0:31:250:31:29

I have examined my conscience, Father,

0:31:330:31:35

and punching that man is not on it.

0:31:350:31:38

I did it in righteous anger,

0:31:380:31:41

the same anger that made Christ drive the money-men from the temple.

0:31:410:31:45

When a white man calls a black man a nigger, he must be punished.

0:31:460:31:50

He only used that word because your boys had called him queer

0:31:500:31:53

and you refused to do anything about it.

0:31:530:31:56

Those words are nowhere near equivalent.

0:31:560:31:58

You can hide your sexuality, I can't hide this.

0:31:580:32:01

You really believe Carl McKenna could hide the kind of man he is?

0:32:010:32:04

Yes, but he chooses not to.

0:32:040:32:06

In fact, he goes further. He advertises it.

0:32:060:32:09

And, in doing that, he is a danger to my sons, to all our sons.

0:32:090:32:14

-Why?

-Because homosexual boys get bullied, Father.

0:32:140:32:16

As do heterosexual.

0:32:160:32:18

Much more homosexual than heterosexual.

0:32:180:32:20

Their lives are made a misery.

0:32:200:32:22

Yes, in which case, we should all try to be more tolerant.

0:32:220:32:26

Teenage boys are not tolerant, Father. They're vicious.

0:32:260:32:30

They turn on you if you stammer,

0:32:300:32:31

if you limp, if you lisp.

0:32:310:32:33

But show them you're homosexual and they turn on you quickest of all.

0:32:330:32:37

You call them gay in this country.

0:32:380:32:41

They're not gay.

0:32:410:32:42

They're sad. So, so sad.

0:32:420:32:46

And I will make sure that my boys know that.

0:32:460:32:49

Better to live a lie than reveal a truth like that.

0:32:490:32:52

-You say your anger is righteous?

-Yes.

0:32:530:32:56

-In the eyes of God, I assume.

-Yes.

0:32:560:32:58

But not in the eyes of the law.

0:32:580:33:00

In the eyes of the law, you have committed a serious crime

0:33:000:33:03

-and you will go to prison for it.

-Yes.

0:33:030:33:06

-Unless...

-Yes?

0:33:060:33:07

..you apologise. Shake hands.

0:33:070:33:11

That would be utterly insincere.

0:33:110:33:14

Nevertheless.

0:33:140:33:16

You can resolve this, Father.

0:33:210:33:24

How?

0:33:240:33:25

You did not see me strike that man.

0:33:250:33:28

You want me to lie to the police?

0:33:330:33:35

Have they not lied to us?

0:33:350:33:37

To expose myself to Carl McKenna as a liar, and then say Mass,

0:33:370:33:40

give out the holy sacrament? You're asking me to do that?

0:33:400:33:43

It's no worse than what you're asking of me.

0:33:430:33:47

To say I'm sorry when I am not.

0:33:470:33:50

To go against my faith, my Catholicism. And for what?

0:33:500:33:55

Fear of imprisonment?

0:33:550:33:57

That is cowardice.

0:33:570:34:00

That is hypocrisy. I will not do it.

0:34:000:34:03

And I am disgusted that a Catholic priest should ask me to.

0:34:040:34:07

'SMOKE ALARM'

0:34:120:34:15

SCRAPING, ALARM CONTINUES

0:34:230:34:27

I'm not doing it.

0:34:420:34:44

"I am not your skivvy," Mum said.

0:34:450:34:47

KNOCKING

0:34:590:35:01

Father Kerrigan?

0:35:010:35:03

KNOCKING

0:35:060:35:09

Are you in there, sir?

0:35:090:35:10

PHONE RINGS

0:35:130:35:15

What's he doing to you?

0:35:150:35:17

Hello.

0:35:170:35:18

Hi, Andrew. It's Michael Kerrigan. I need some advice.

0:35:180:35:22

-Right.

-There's two coppers outside.

-'Yeah, I know.'

0:35:220:35:26

-You know?

-Yeah.

0:35:260:35:29

-Have they come to take me in to make a statement?

-Yeah.

0:35:290:35:33

-Have I got to make that statement?

-Well, no...

0:35:330:35:38

No, you don't have to.

0:35:380:35:40

If I make that statement and Daniel's found guilty, what will he get?

0:35:400:35:44

I'd say four to six years.

0:35:440:35:46

'It's a hate crime, you see. But you know that when he's done it,'

0:35:460:35:49

Michael, he'll be thrown out the country, won't be allowed back in.

0:35:490:35:52

'Which means he'll never see Helen again.

0:35:520:35:54

'It's horrible, isn't it?

0:35:540:35:56

'Seeing other people suffer for your principles?'

0:35:560:36:00

I know that I couldn't do it.

0:36:020:36:04

-Thanks.

-'You're welcome.'

0:36:060:36:09

BARKING

0:36:110:36:13

KNOCKING

0:36:260:36:28

Look Carl, you've got to remember that in his country

0:36:280:36:31

it's still illegal to be gay.

0:36:310:36:33

You can make all the excuses you want,

0:36:330:36:35

this has nothing to do with the colour of his skin or what country he's from.

0:36:350:36:39

This is about religion and nothing else.

0:36:390:36:42

Now, every morning I look out of my window and I see

0:36:420:36:45

tiny, little kids heading off to that school of yours,

0:36:450:36:48

and guess what? Yeah, they'll also be taught that being gay is a sin.

0:36:480:36:52

That it's perfectly acceptable to treat people like me with contempt.

0:36:520:36:56

It's a cycle of hatred perpetuated by your church

0:36:560:36:59

and I'll tell you what. As far as I'm concerned,

0:36:590:37:03

the world will be a better place when Catholicism and every other

0:37:030:37:07

goddamn religion has been consigned to history.

0:37:070:37:10

My church teaches compassion for all human beings

0:37:100:37:12

regardless of religion, race, sexuality.

0:37:120:37:15

And it also teaches that I'm a sinner,

0:37:150:37:18

which is something that you go along with, Michael,

0:37:180:37:20

cos if you didn't, yeah, you'd be on the dole.

0:37:200:37:23

Look, I'm not asking you to do this for me, or for him.

0:37:230:37:26

I'm asking you to do it for Helen. She's suffered enough, Carl.

0:37:260:37:30

And if you had any idea how much I'd suffered,

0:37:300:37:32

you wouldn't dream of putting me in this position.

0:37:320:37:35

Now, the police told me that if anyone tries to intimidate me

0:37:350:37:39

or put pressure on me to drop the charges,

0:37:390:37:41

that I am to report them immediately.

0:37:410:37:44

I'm not trying to put pressure on you.

0:37:440:37:46

Have you made your statement yet?

0:37:460:37:48

Have you?

0:37:490:37:51

And you make out that you're impartial? Just go, Father.

0:37:530:37:57

I think we both know whose side you're really on.

0:37:570:37:59

Believe me, Carl, I'm on no-one's side.

0:37:590:38:02

I'm like the man with a chip on both shoulders.

0:38:020:38:06

I'm just as screwed up about straight sex as I am gay.

0:38:060:38:09

I will make a statement, yeah, and I'll tell the absolute truth,

0:38:090:38:12

but right now, there's nothing I'd like more than to get

0:38:120:38:16

the four of us together in a room,

0:38:160:38:18

because I'm sick of this Ban Ki-Moon act.

0:38:180:38:20

Oh, please tell me you're joking.

0:38:220:38:23

Look! If not for me, then for Helen.

0:38:230:38:27

This is to remind us of the presence of Christ

0:38:370:38:41

and to enable us to speak truth with compassion.

0:38:410:38:45

All I've ever wanted is to set a good example to my sons

0:38:550:39:01

and protect them from the evils of this world,

0:39:010:39:05

and in here,

0:39:050:39:07

I know that homosexuality is one of them.

0:39:070:39:11

And not because I'm homophobic

0:39:110:39:14

or repulsed by what two men choose to do together,

0:39:140:39:18

but in the Bible, it clearly states

0:39:180:39:23

that homosexuals will not inherit the Kingdom of God.

0:39:230:39:27

I was raised a Catholic too.

0:39:270:39:29

I loved it, believed it with all my heart.

0:39:300:39:33

But I also knew that I was different.

0:39:360:39:38

I even wondered if God was calling me to be a priest.

0:39:410:39:45

But I soon realised, no, I was just gay.

0:39:450:39:48

I prayed and prayed for God to make it stop,

0:39:480:39:51

to make me normal,

0:39:510:39:53

but He didn't listen.

0:39:530:39:55

Now, I'd been brought up to believe that being gay was a sin,

0:39:570:40:00

that God hated gay people,

0:40:000:40:02

so why would I choose such a thing, hmm?

0:40:020:40:04

Why would I choose such a thing when I knew it meant

0:40:040:40:08

that the church that I loved would no longer welcome me?

0:40:080:40:12

Choose?

0:40:140:40:15

Don't make me laugh.

0:40:150:40:16

This will hurt you both,

0:40:160:40:19

but in these circumstances, I cannot lie.

0:40:190:40:23

Daniel, you have always been holier than thou.

0:40:240:40:28

Carl, you have always been one to light the blue touchpaper

0:40:290:40:33

and then run away.

0:40:330:40:35

And now you have met.

0:40:350:40:37

And it is a match made in hell.

0:40:370:40:39

Two stupid, stubborn men refusing to back down,

0:40:400:40:45

locking horns, totally forgetting the only thing that should matter -

0:40:450:40:50

bringing Vernon home.

0:40:500:40:52

Yeah, the world is full of gay men

0:40:520:40:56

who can hide their sexuality, live a lie,

0:40:560:41:00

but do you seriously believe that that was ever an option for me?

0:41:000:41:05

The way I am, the way I speak, it's not some affectation.

0:41:050:41:09

It's not some show, it's not trying to shock or intimidate anyone.

0:41:090:41:14

It's just the way I was born

0:41:140:41:17

and I make no apology for that.

0:41:170:41:19

At least not any more, I don't.

0:41:190:41:21

And if you believe in God, then you also have to believe

0:41:210:41:24

that it was your God who created me this way.

0:41:240:41:27

You were in pain, Carl, angry.

0:41:270:41:31

Just waiting for someone to come along for you to lash out,

0:41:310:41:36

and you want to know how I know that?

0:41:360:41:38

Because I feel exactly the same.

0:41:380:41:41

I feel just as angry as you.

0:41:410:41:43

I know what it feels like when the person you love most of all

0:41:430:41:46

in this world is taken from you.

0:41:460:41:49

When your only reason to wake up in the morning is no longer there.

0:41:490:41:53

I wasn't even going to report it.

0:41:530:41:55

I didn't think they'd take it seriously,

0:41:550:41:58

but credit where credit is due,

0:41:580:42:00

I was amazed how supportive they were.

0:42:000:42:02

When I was growing up back in the '80s,

0:42:020:42:05

gay-bashing was virtually the national sport,

0:42:050:42:07

and most people in this country were gold medallists.

0:42:070:42:12

But now finally things are starting to change.

0:42:120:42:15

And hallelujah for that, because the only way to stamp out

0:42:150:42:18

this kind of hatred is to come down heavy on those who perpetrate it.

0:42:180:42:22

A sinner needs a priest, yes,

0:42:220:42:26

but first let him be contrite,

0:42:260:42:29

ashamed, penitent.

0:42:290:42:32

This man is none of those things.

0:42:330:42:36

His mincing, his voice,

0:42:370:42:40

his innuendos all announce that he is ready to sin again,

0:42:400:42:44

that he is proud of it, boastful of it.

0:42:440:42:48

This is a sin that my church has utterly condemned,

0:42:500:42:53

so how can a priest find it so amusing?

0:42:530:42:56

I didn't intend to speak but I suppose I should answer that, yeah?

0:43:010:43:06

-Yes.

-I am not amused by it,

0:43:060:43:09

I'm amused by him.

0:43:090:43:11

-Really?

-Yeah.

0:43:110:43:12

I suppose we were all teenagers once.

0:43:140:43:16

-Yeah.

-Confused at times about our sexuality.

0:43:160:43:20

Yeah.

0:43:210:43:23

So how did you feel, Father,

0:43:230:43:24

when you thought you might be a homosexual?

0:43:240:43:27

The candle is still burning, Christ is still here,

0:43:340:43:38

encouraging us to speak truth.

0:43:380:43:42

How did you feel, when you thought you might be a homosexual?

0:43:420:43:46

It was the 1970s...

0:43:500:43:52

How did you feel?

0:43:520:43:55

Erm, suicidal.

0:44:010:44:04

Thank you.

0:44:060:44:08

Enough of this small talk.

0:44:190:44:21

Thank you, Father.

0:44:290:44:30

Bye, Michael.

0:44:360:44:39

MUSIC: Sisters Are Doin' It for Themselves by Eurythmics

0:45:090:45:14

# Now there was a time

0:45:170:45:20

# When they used to say

0:45:200:45:23

# That behind every great man

0:45:230:45:27

# There had to be a great woman

0:45:270:45:31

# But in these times of change

0:45:310:45:35

# You know that it's no longer true

0:45:350:45:38

# So we're comin' out of the kitchen

0:45:380:45:42

# Cos there's somethin' we forgot to say to you

0:45:420:45:46

# Sisters are doing it for themselves

0:45:460:45:52

# Standing on their... #

0:45:520:45:54

# We are the champions, my friends

0:45:540:46:00

# And we'll keep on fighting till the end

0:46:020:46:07

# We are the champions

0:46:100:46:13

# We are the champions

0:46:130:46:17

# No time for losers

0:46:170:46:20

# Cos we are the champions

0:46:200:46:25

# Of the world! #

0:46:250:46:29

CHEERING

0:46:320:46:34

KNOCKING

0:46:560:46:58

Thanks again.

0:47:010:47:02

He punched a man and I saw it.

0:47:060:47:08

I'll have to say I saw it.

0:47:080:47:10

He'll go down for it and he'll see himself as some kind

0:47:100:47:13

of Catholic martyr when he does.

0:47:130:47:14

-No other way?

-No.

0:47:140:47:16

Thanks. Carl won't back down and why should he?

0:47:160:47:21

Daniel won't either.

0:47:210:47:23

I know what I should say - "Daniel, thanks to Catholic teaching,

0:47:230:47:26

"you're a totally fucked-up human being,

0:47:260:47:28

"but that's OK cos so was I.

0:47:280:47:30

"Ignore everything the church says on the subject of sex, Daniel.

0:47:300:47:33

"I do that. Every priest I know does that.

0:47:330:47:36

"You can quote scripture till you're blue in the face,

0:47:360:47:38

"papal pronouncements, edicts, whatever, they are all utter shite."

0:47:380:47:42

Or words to that effect.

0:47:450:47:47

Didn't you want sugar?

0:47:480:47:50

Yeah.

0:47:500:47:53

Good job I didn't take up smoking.

0:47:530:47:55

-I'm sorry to bring this one on you as well.

-You're OK.

0:47:560:47:59

I can cope usually, honest.

0:47:590:48:01

You're fine, man.

0:48:010:48:03

It's a bit like buses, isn't it?

0:48:030:48:06

You wait all your life for a decent dilemma to come along

0:48:060:48:09

and then three arrive at the one time.

0:48:090:48:13

What can I do?

0:48:130:48:14

Well, we could pray to the Lord.

0:48:140:48:16

He usually comes up with something.

0:48:160:48:18

Not this time, Peter.

0:48:180:48:20

Irresistible force meets immovable object.

0:48:200:48:24

I need a miracle.

0:48:240:48:26

Hello.

0:48:280:48:30

Yes?

0:48:310:48:33

Vernon can come home!

0:48:350:48:37

# Lord of all hopefulness

0:48:460:48:50

# Lord of all joy

0:48:500:48:54

# Whose trust, ever childlike

0:48:540:48:58

# No cares can destroy... #

0:48:580:49:00

Father?

0:49:000:49:02

It's Vernon, Father.

0:49:020:49:06

Vernon.

0:49:060:49:08

# Your bliss in our hearts, Lord

0:49:120:49:15

# At the break of the day

0:49:150:49:19

# Lord of all eagerness

0:49:290:49:32

# Lord of all faith

0:49:320:49:36

# Whose strong hands were skilled at

0:49:360:49:40

# The plane and the lathe

0:49:400:49:44

# Be there at our labours... #

0:49:440:49:47

Thank you, Helen.

0:49:470:49:49

Please.

0:49:510:49:53

I'll be five minutes.

0:49:530:49:56

Oh.

0:50:120:50:14

Would you like to come through, please?

0:50:140:50:16

# Your hands swift to welcome

0:50:180:50:23

# Your arms to embrace

0:50:230:50:27

# Be there at our homing

0:50:270:50:31

# And give us, we pray

0:50:310:50:35

# Your love in our hearts, Lord

0:50:350:50:39

# At the eve of the day... #

0:50:390:50:43

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

0:50:500:50:53

Blessed art thou amongst women

0:50:530:50:55

and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.

0:50:550:50:57

-ALL:

-Holy Mary, mother of God,

0:50:570:51:00

pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death.

0:51:000:51:03

Amen.

0:51:030:51:05

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

0:51:050:51:08

Blessed art thou amongst women

0:51:080:51:10

and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.

0:51:100:51:13

-ALL:

-Holy Mary, mother of God,

0:51:130:51:15

pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death.

0:51:150:51:18

Amen.

0:51:180:51:19

# Lord of all kindliness

0:51:350:51:39

# Lord of all grace

0:51:390:51:43

# Your hands swift to welcome

0:51:430:51:47

# Your arms to embrace

0:51:470:51:51

# Be there at our homing

0:51:510:51:55

# And give us, we pray

0:51:550:52:00

# Your love in our hearts, Lord

0:52:000:52:04

# At the eve of the day

0:52:040:52:08

# Lord of all gentleness

0:52:170:52:22

# Lord of all calm

0:52:220:52:25

# Whose voice is contentment

0:52:250:52:29

# Whose presence is balm

0:52:290:52:33

# Be there at our sleeping

0:52:330:52:37

# And give us, we pray

0:52:370:52:41

# Your peace in our hearts, Lord

0:52:410:52:46

# At the end of the day. #

0:52:460:52:49

Barcelona?

0:52:490:52:50

Yes.

0:52:500:52:52

Why Barcelona?

0:52:560:52:58

We used to watch them together.

0:53:000:53:02

He liked Messi.

0:53:020:53:04

Something Messi.

0:53:060:53:08

Lionel Messi.

0:53:080:53:09

Yes. I know you like Messi, Vernon. I've seen your room.

0:53:130:53:17

If there's a shred of comfort I can take from this,

0:53:190:53:22

it's that deep down I'm glad God took him before me.

0:53:220:53:25

Why?

0:53:290:53:30

The number of sleepless nights I've had worried about

0:53:320:53:34

what would become of him if anything ever happened to me.

0:53:340:53:37

He was such a kind and loving boy,

0:53:410:53:43

but when he was having one of his episodes, he was so...

0:53:430:53:46

..difficult.

0:53:480:53:51

I knew no matter how hard I prayed,

0:53:510:53:52

the chances of him ever leading a normal life were slim.

0:53:520:53:55

I worried about him growing old,

0:53:570:54:00

the thought of him ending up in some institution,

0:54:000:54:03

with nobody in the world to love him.

0:54:030:54:06

Brenda understood how I felt.

0:54:110:54:12

Carl's mother.

0:54:140:54:15

We both had sons who were troubled in their own ways.

0:54:180:54:22

That's why we felt such affinity.

0:54:220:54:25

Yes?

0:54:290:54:30

This is unfair.

0:54:330:54:34

What is unfair?

0:54:340:54:37

I cannot argue with you.

0:54:370:54:39

I cannot contradict you in these circumstances.

0:54:400:54:42

Why not?

0:54:420:54:44

You have done nothing BUT contradict me since the moment you arrived

0:54:440:54:48

so why stop now?

0:54:480:54:50

Because he home?

0:54:500:54:52

Is he more dead now than he was before,

0:54:520:54:55

more dead now that you can see him?

0:54:550:54:58

Her son and mine both had difficulties growing up,

0:54:580:55:03

were both picked on because they were different

0:55:030:55:06

and we bonded because of it,

0:55:060:55:09

because they were so alike!

0:55:090:55:12

When Brenda was diagnosed, she came to me

0:55:130:55:17

worried about what would become of Carl.

0:55:170:55:20

I promised her that I would always keep an eye out for her

0:55:200:55:24

and I intend to keep that promise.

0:55:240:55:26

She was a good mother who never once tried to change him,

0:55:260:55:31

but accepted him for who he was and I so admired her for that.

0:55:310:55:36

Her love was unconditional and that's exactly how it should be.

0:55:360:55:41

Daniel...

0:55:450:55:49

I wouldn't care if my son was straight,

0:55:490:55:53

gay or anything else,

0:55:530:55:56

just so long as I can see that beautiful smile once more.

0:55:560:56:00

KNOCKING

0:56:130:56:15

I'll get that.

0:56:170:56:18

Can I speak to Helen, please?

0:56:260:56:28

Yeah, come in.

0:56:280:56:31

Look, It's fine. Honest.

0:56:340:56:35

I knew you'd have him in that shirt.

0:56:540:56:56

I'm stopping all this right now.

0:57:000:57:02

I'm telling them whatever I need to tell them to get it all to stop.

0:57:040:57:08

Thank you.

0:57:080:57:10

I'm not doing it for him.

0:57:100:57:13

I'm doing it for you.

0:57:130:57:15

And for Vernon.

0:57:150:57:18

Brenda would be so proud of you.

0:57:210:57:24

Yeah.

0:57:270:57:28

Praise the Lord.

0:57:380:57:39

KNOCKING

0:57:430:57:46

There's more Christianity in your little finger

0:57:480:57:50

than in that man's entire body.

0:57:500:57:52

Yeah, why don't you tell that to your bishop?

0:57:520:57:55

Tell it to your pope. Shout it from the rooftops, why don't you?

0:57:550:57:59

There's no use coming around here and whispering it to me,

0:57:590:58:01

you bloody hypocrite.

0:58:010:58:03

# Tell me what it's like in heaven

0:58:090:58:14

# I hope it's kinder than it is down here

0:58:140:58:19

# With all the trials and tribulations

0:58:190:58:24

# All the worry and living in fear

0:58:240:58:28

# We are lost, we are scattered

0:58:280:58:32

# We're balmy and we're battered

0:58:320:58:35

# We might be bruised but we're not broken

0:58:370:58:41

# Hallelujah

0:58:410:58:45

# Hallelujah... #

0:58:450:58:47

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