Matthew and Son Doctors

Don't worry, your receipts'll be ship-shape before you can say,

"Where's me audit?" HE CHUCKLES

Yeah, absolutely. How does 11.30 suit you?

Smashing! See you then.

Oh, and...put the kettle on.

HE CHUCKLES

Yeah, all right. See you. Bye-bye.

PHONE RINGS

Mason & Mayhew. James Fenwick speaking. How may I...?

I'll be right in.

Can you explain this?

HE CLEARS THROAT

This is the Hassan account.

They own a corner shop. I've just filed their tax return.

And?

Something about a trust fund?

Oh!

Mr Hassan's just had a baby daughter and wanted to put something aside for when she goes to university.

So I told him how he could make some tax savings by opening a trust fund.

The Hassans have only paid for the basic package -

an audit of the business accounts.

He just wanted some advice.

While you're doling out free advice, you're keeping valuable, PAYING customers waiting.

-I can't have that.

-No, you see, it was on a lunch break...

When you're sent out on commission you're on company time - period.

Yes, of course.

Look, I know you're new here,

and it is a steep learning curve,

but time is money, James. Never forget that.

You're right.

It won't happen again.

Close the door on your way out.

The Mill and the Campus have slowly been haemorrhaging money.

A little bit here, a little bit there - drip, drip, drip.

If left to do so, before we know it we'll find ourselves

flat-lining on the table with no hope of a transfusion.

Good choice of metaphor.

Thank you.

I've drawn up a list of efficiency savings I'd like to implement without delay.

-No redundancies, I hope?

-No, no, no.

There are other ways we can tighten our belts.

As you can see, I've found alternative sources for various medical supplies.

Companies with more competitive rates.

Will there be any noticeable drop in quality?

A latex glove is a latex glove.

If we can get it half price from China, we'd be fools not to do so.

Quite.

Child labour be damned, eh?

Well, I suppose that concludes things here.

Any suggestions on further cutbacks would be greatly appreciated.

We'll put our thinking caps on.

ALARM CLOCK BLEEPS

BLEEPING CONTINUES

Jack, how d'you turn this thing off?

BLEEPING STOPS

HE RETCHES >

Fenwick's Accountancy, good morning.

Ah, I'm afraid James no longer works here.

Is there anything I can do to help?

No, I don't have a contact number.

HE SIGHS

I'm just making a few initial enquiries.

'We already employ a reliable accountant

'but I'm open to finding a better offer elsewhere.'

Of course.

It's always wise to look for the optimum value for money.

I'm sure we can put together a very attractive package for the Mill and Campus surgeries.

We already have several medical practices on our books,

'so you can be confident of our expertise.'

Our initial consultation is free, of course.

How would this afternoon suit?

I have a 2.30 window at the Mill.

Excellent. I'll send one of my best accountants.

Goodbye, Mr Bellamy.

Cheerio.

Beautiful!

Can I help you?

I have a few home visits lined up by the Mill.

If you like, I could make the 2.30 appointment.

I think I should send someone with more than a few months' experience, don't you?

Ms Durand, I've been qualified for four years.

-And, as it happens, I'm familiar...

-I said no.

And in future, when I'm on a call you'll wait outside until I'm finished.

Is that understood?

Yes, of course.

Sorry.

MUSIC PLAYS LOUDLY

-< IMOGEN:

-Jack?

PHONE RINGS

-JACK!

-All right!

VOLUME REDUCES

Are you feeling as rough as me?

HE CHUCKLES I rode the chunder train this morning - it was well rank.

What - another party? When?

Are you serious - all day?

Well, yeah. Yeah, course I'm up for it.

Need to get some food first and have a shower. I'm a total armpit right now.

SMOKE ALARM BEEPS Oh, I'm burning the house down here. See you later.

Aargh!

What?

HE COUGHS

What are you doing here?

I need to talk to you.

I'm not interested in anything you have to say.

I don't have time for this. If my boss knew I was here, I'd lose my job.

Is that supposed to impress me?

Just listen to me for once.

Look, I don't have time for this, either. I'm up to my neck in work.

Dad, I think you're about to lose your best client.

Why? Are you going to steal them away from me

like you did all the others?

-Those were customers

-I

-brought in. If they wanted to leave with me, that was their prerogative.

Look, I didn't come here to fight.

I just thought you should know that there's somebody new at the Mill now and...

-..he's shopping around for a new accountant.

-I'm well aware Ms Parsons has retired.

I haven't met Mr Bellamy yet

but when we do, I'm sure we'll get on just fine.

Look, I'm an old hand at this game, my boy. I certainly don't need help from you or anybody else.

Fine. Well, I'm sorry I bothered you.

PHONE RINGS

-SLURRED:

-Hello?

Hi, Aunt Patti, it's me.

Oh, Freya. How are you, love?

I'm OK. Are you? You sound as though you've just woken up.

Oh, I'm just resting.

-I'm feeling a bit under the weather today.

-What do you mean, "under the weather"?

Just tired and achy.

That's probably a side effect from the medication.

You should mention it at your next appointment.

I will.

'OK.'

Will you ring me if you need anything?

All right, dear. Bye-bye.

# If you wanna come back it's all right, it's all right

# It's all right if you wanna come back

# Do you wanna come back?

# It's all right, it's all right

# It's all right if you want to come back... #

What's the problem now?

-You're making a racket!

-I had my headphones on.

You were singing at the top of your lungs, you idiot!

Oh. Well, I can't help it - I'm in a good mood.

-Well, isn't it just great to be you(?)

-Im, you couldn't lend me a tenner, could you?

I've got to take some booze to this party but I'm totally tapped out from last night.

Are you actually asking me for money?

-I'll pay you back.

-Drop...dead.

You don't actually use this thing, do you?

No. My father gave it to me.

Used to belong to my grandfather, actually. He used...

Why didn't you tell me it was Fenwick's Accountancy that handles the Mill?

I tried to.

A personal connection can make all the difference

between winning and losing a client.

Who did the Mill's books - you or your father?

We both did - it was a lot to handle.

There are two separate practices,

plus all the partners' personal accounts.

I want you to conduct the consultation with Mr Bellamy.

Make it clear you have a prior relationship with them.

A familiar face selling a superior service -

he'd be a fool not to switch to us.

If you're more concerned about your father's business than this one,

now's the time to say.

No.

May the best man win.

That's what I like to hear.

If you succeed, you'll get to handle the contract yourself.

It's quite a big step up in your career, wouldn't you say?

-What's this?

-Just a little bonus for all your help the other night.

-A hundred quid?

-My appointment book is absolutely full because of you.

I told you it was a good idea, didn't I? It's a pity we can't do it all the time.

Who says we can't?

I stand to make about three grand from one night.

Karen, we've struck gold.

Yeah, but we can't keep tapping up the same neighbours for money.

Botox wears off, doesn't it?

Believe me - four months down the line, the same women will be back.

But not just on their own - with their friends, with their neighbours.

Karen, we've got all the ingredients.

All we need to do is turn up the gas and start cooking.

We take pride in the fact that no matter what your business needs,

-we can tailor our service exclusively to suit you.

-Cut the sales talk - give me the basics.

The basic package includes the audit and, of course, book keeping.

Optional extras include tax planning,

insolvency and consultancy services.

We're a large firm, so we can afford to be highly specialised.

Good to know.

We'd match your present arrangement by extending our service to the private accounts of the partners -

Dr Carmichael, Dr Granger and Dr Carter.

I understand Ms Parsons remains as a silent partner.

You HAVE done your homework.

You could say that. I used to work at Fenwick's Accountancy.

I noticed the name was the same but I didn't realise.

So Matthew Fenwick is...

My father.

So, you see, if you decided to change firms,

you'd be getting a better deal and retaining continuity of service.

Indeed.

I respect the way my father does business, I really do, but...

he refuses to modernise.

I made the move to Mason & Mayhew

because they offer so much more opportunity.

If you did the same, you'd find out for yourself.

RUBBER BAND PINGS

-Do you have to do that?

-I'm bored.

What do you want me to do about it?

Well, you could give me that tenner.

Come on, Im. I'm all dressed up with nowhere to go. Please?

Ple-e-ease?

Fine. You want the tenner? There is your stupid tenner!

Thank you - you are the best.

Yeah, go and enjoy your party! I'm just about to flunk out of college, by the way,

but don't let that spoil YOUR enjoyment.

SHE SOBS

-OK.

-Thanks so much.

-Oh. Good afternoon, sir.

-Afternoon.

-Matthew Fenwick, at your service.

-Howard Bellamy.

Ah. Delighted to finally put a face to the name.

Please, take a seat.

Your timing's perfect - the kettle's just boiled.

-Not for me, thanks. I can't stay long.

-Right.

So...

..what can I do for you?

I thought it only right to come down here and deliver the news in person,

given your years of long and excellent service to the practice.

Please. Can I... Can I stop you there, Mr Bellamy?

I think I know what you're going to say.

You've decided to take your business elsewhere.

Please don't think this is a reflection on all your hard work over the years.

It's just, in tough economic times we have to make difficult decisions.

You've found a better rate. I quite understand.

And I admit I can't compete with the larger corporations on price.

But just consider this -

for the sake of saving a few pounds,

you stand to lose a whole raft of benefits.

Such as?

A personalised service from someone with experience.

Someone who knows your business accounts like the back of his hand.

You won't find that elsewhere.

I'm afraid I already have.

So...

..this is down to James, is it?

No. It's just business.

I really am very sorry.

Please...

don't do this.

If I lose this account, I'm finished.

Poetry is just too hard. I totally bombed in it last year and I cannot fail again,

-but it's not making any sense!

-OK, well...

-I put a timetable together to stick to and I'm totally behind.

It's pointless! I cannot catch up now.

-Look, you...

-I found this past paper online yesterday, and I thought,

"Great - this'll prove how much I know," but I just couldn't answer anything!

It's like I've got amnesia or something.

Im, you just need to stop stressing and stick at it.

Bit of peace and quiet and it'll all start to go in, you'll see.

OK? I'll leave you to it, then.

Everything all right?

Hm.

No. Bit of a bind, actually.

Ethically.

Can I help?

-Our accountants.

-Fenwick's.

Mm. Small family-run business, as you know.

Quality service, but struggling to remain competitive.

A big corporation like Mason & Mayhew can undercut everybody else and push them out of business.

But is it fair for them to be the only fish in the sea?

Of course it's fair - it's survival of the fittest.

So if they offer me a cheaper deal, should I take it?

Without question.

Even if it costs a man his livelihood?

Well, look, I'm sorry if that's the case,

but businesses are going to the wall every day.

What I'm trying to say is that I don't think that we can afford to be sentimental -

not in today's climate.

I think we owe it to the patient to put them first.

-Thank you.

-Welcome.

We have won the account for the Mill and Campus surgeries.

Mr Bellamy's on his way now. I'll need you to draw up the paperwork.

Right. Of course.

Well done, James. We couldn't have done it without you.

Thanks.

James, I think it's best if I handle the account from here.

-But you said...

-I said I'd think about it...

and I have. As much as I'd like to say otherwise,

I just don't think you're ready.

It's nothing personal, James.

It's just business.

You'd best crack on. I want those documents ready to sign.

I thought you'd gone to the party.

No-one wants to be the first numpty to turn up, do they?

Thanks.

You're doing John Clare? I did him at A-level.

I'll quiz you, if you like.

-Jack, that's really sweet but you don't have to.

-Shut up.

They'll probably ask you something like,

"How does John Clare feel about nature?"

I don't know - he's always droning on about it.

Trees and birds and stuff.

Yeah, but he's not just painting a pretty picture, is he? How does he FEEL about it?

Well, actually, he's pretty steamed up.

-Like in The Fallen Elm.

-Go on.

Basically, it's about the destruction of this old tree

by this boring thing called the Enclosure Act.

The tree survives everything that nature throws at it,

like "the black tempest of a winter night" or "summers of thirst",

but it took humans to actually destroy it.

But why should we care about something that happened over a century ago?

Because it's still happening today.

Think about it - human greed is still destroying nature

and the rich get to wreck the lives of the poor.

It's like that Jonson quote about Shakespeare. "He was not of an age, but for all time."

Wow! Think of all that yourself?

-Yeah.

-See? It's all in there, Im. You just got to let it out.

"Re-groovy-nation. Party yourself younger."

Suburban house parties with a difference.

Demonstrations in a relaxed, social setting.

You handle the bookings, I'll take care of the ladies.

-Easy!

-And this is just the beginning.

Picture this - dozens of Botox parties happening in homes all across the nation.

-What - do we go on the road?

-No, no. No, we don't go anywhere. Think franchise.

We target other centres with doctors who want to top up their pay.

They use our marketing material, we take a cut.

We'll be raking it in.

-Very ingenious.

-Just a little joint venture we've been working on.

So I heard. Be interesting to take a look at the figures.

Please. Have a look - we'd welcome your expertise.

"Re-groovy-nation.

"Party yourself younger!"

SHE CHUCKLES

You've made the right decision, Mr Bellamy.

May this be the start of a long and fruitful relationship.

It says here you'll be handling the accounts yourself.

I like to oversee some of the larger contracts.

I delegate, of course, but only to my most experienced accountants.

Like James Fenwick?

James is an excellent worker.

All my staff are highly qualified,

but I want you to receive the best possible service.

I'm here on the understanding that James will be my accountant.

He has prior knowledge of the practice and, what's more, I like him.

James...

could you join us in my office, please?

Right away.

Is there something wrong with the paperwork?

Yes.

Your name's not on it.

Congratulations. You're handling the Mill and Campus accounts.

I don't know what to say.

How about thank you... to Mr Bellamy?

It's all down to him.

No thanks needed.

I'm just doing what's right for the practice. Plain and simple.

Wait.

-Don't sign.

-What are you doing?

-You're not getting the deal you think you are.

-James!

-It looks good but they hit you with hidden charges.

Postage. Photocopying. Phone calls. And that's just for starters.

-That's enough.

-It's all in the small print.

-They call them "disbursements" - can you believe it?

-Get out!

My father has his faults but he's as honest as the day is long.

I guess they just don't make them like they used to.

You can tell which poets actually fought in the trenches,

like Sassoon and Owen whose poems are more bleak and visceral.

Whereas the ones who weren't, they feel more detached and patriotic.

Thanks, Jack. Listen, I'll be fine on my own now.

We can carry on if you like.

No, you've already missed half the party.

It's fine. I should probably give it a miss anyway after last night.

Believe me, when these exams are over, I am going to par-tay.

Go. One of us should be having fun.

All right. As long as you're sure.

And I will pay you back for that tenner.

Jack, you've made me lunch and you've helped me revise - you've more than earned it.

Earned it?

Was it worth it?

Ask me again on Monday when I'm standing in line at the job centre.

Let me give you a lift. It's the least I can do.

-Really? I live a little way out of town.

-That's fine.

-I'm not taking you home.

-What?

Come on.

I suppose you've come to gloat.

Does it look like it?

Oh, I see!

Little Lord Fauntleroy gets fired

and thinks he can come crawling back to Daddy?

Told you this was a bad idea.

Mr Fenwick, your son lost his job protecting my interests and defending your reputation.

I'd say he was a young man to be proud of.

Oh.

Well, er...

..you might as well put that down since you're here.

You might even...

..want to unpack it.

Maybe.

Well, don't do me any favours - I was just thinking of you.

Really? That would be a first.

You think I want you back,

with your chatter and your clutter and your big ideas?

I'm perfectly happy on my own.

Good, cos now I know what it's like to work somewhere they actually appreciate my talents.

-Oh yes, it certainly looks that way(!)

-I need an accountant!

Mr Fenwick senior needs to keep his business afloat and Mr Fenwick junior needs a job.

Hmm. I wonder if there's a solution to solve all our problems.

I'll keep my business at Fenwick's Accountants...for now.

But you have to make it worth my while.

The only way to survive in this current market is to be better than the competition.

And I think you can be, if you work together.

I've got some ideas about how to broaden our client base.

Maybe expand into consultancy.

I'm a numbers man, James.

I don't know about all that stuff.

Yes, but I do.

You'll just have to trust me.

I'll put the kettle on, shall I?

You still here?

Yeah, yeah, I'll go in a minute. Check this out.

"Personal services." Eurgh!

It's not like that. I'm offering a freelance concierge service.

So I'll do all the jobs people don't have time to do.

Like walk your dog or mow your lawn.

Pick your kids up from school, drop off your dry cleaning.

-If it keeps Mum and Dad off my back about spending money...

-So you're going to be a butler?

You might call it a butler.

I call it someone with loads of 20s in their pocket.

Right, well as long as you don't call it "personal services".

Fine.

KNOCK AT DOOR

Come in.

Hi, Howard. Just wondered if you'd had a chance to look over those figures.

-I have.

-And?

-Very interesting.

So you think it's a viable idea?

Absolutely. I think with the clinic and the parties combined, you stand to make a handsome profit.

-Which highlights a little bit of a problem, as I see it.

-Problem?

If you're going to make this kind of money out of the Botox clinic,

I feel that the practice ought to make considerably more from the arrangement.

Wait a minute. Julia and I agreed on the rate some time ago.

Did you sign a fixed-term contract?

That's not really how it works here.

-A verbal agreement is as good as a contract.

-Which is why you've been enjoying mates' rates all this time.

But that kind of thing no longer has a place in the NHS.

I think a 45% cut is reasonable.

-45?!

-You must understand

I have to get the best rates possible for this practice.

After all, what was it you said?

"We owe it to the patients to put them first."

So, do we have a deal?

-Of course.

-Good.

I'll draw up the agreement.

Do you not like Mr Huggit?

I'm going to have a go at this right now! Best birthday present ever!

-Who the hell has a party when they're 44?

-It's different for you.

I see. I could be dead next year?

The pain's started to ease, as well,

and now I can flex all my fingers.

That's brilliant!

I need to do it to take my mind off things.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd