Art and Soul Doctors

That was the buyer. He hated it.

Joke!

30 of them!

-30?

-Result, son!

I told you, didn't I?

How many times have I told you? You have got what it takes.

RADIO: 'And as thousands of students wait for their results tomorrow,

'we play Should I Stay Or Should I Go? by The Clash...'

Least you don't have to worry about that now.

Student loans and some professor telling you what you already know.

I can't wait to get going.

I'm telling you, lad, this is really going to turn things around.

It's fantastic, Dad.

Oi!

Hey!

I'm the one who's been up half the night trying to work out what to cook!

But not that, surely!

I'm not going to win SupaChef with a posh shepherd's pie.

I need to practise!

I thought the idea was to keep it simple?

I don't know what I'm doing, to be honest.

Well, you've got a couple of days yet.

No, five on clock, Rob! I have to e-mail the menu by five!

All right, no need to bite my head off!

Although it would probably taste better than that.

Morning, love. I've made some cupcakes.

"Simple food, amazing ingredients, cooked well."

I thought that was the plan, as of 11.30 last night.

We're a bit short of amazing ingredients in our cupboard.

-You'd better get shopping, then!

-That's the point, Rob! I haven't got the time.

Are you all right?

Fine.

I don't think you've got anything to worry about.

Oh, oh, oh!

Not bad, eh?

See, if there's one thing I can make, it's cupcakes.

I feel a bit sick, actually.

You have not failed.

But even if you have, what does it matter? It's just a piece of paper.

Look, tell you what.

To take your mind off things, why don't you help me?

Your mission, to find some amazing ingredients,

so I can practice a few different things.

Right - shank of venison.

Juniper berry.

What you need to do is go to Gleesons and price up a bulk order.

-Me?

-All the timber.

It'll want delivering.

Get them to give you a quote, and tell them you want a good discount.

-That's a big order there.

-But it's going to take me for ever to make 30 cabinets.

Might as well hunt about for nice bits of wood. You know,

-a bit at a time.

-No!

Time to wise up.

I can run 'em through the band-saw at work. Size 'em down.

We'll get a production line going, you and me! We'll knock 'em out!

Wouldn't mind seeing their faces down Gleesons

when you walk in - "Gi's a price for 50 square metres, French oak."

American White - airdried!

Whatever!

Clever clogs.

"Ray Gordon & Son, Cabinet Makers."

Got them printed up the other day.

Thought I'd see how we did with the cabinet first.

Anyway, give 'em one of them. They'll know you mean business.

And then we'll go through the prices as soon as I get back.

Tell you what. This is just the start.

I think this family might have turned a corner here.

Might want to put a shirt on and some, er...

Morning!

What's that?

Oh, just a little something I want to try out on people later.

Sorry?

Well, I'm thinking of putting them on my menu.

You're looking at one of the official candidates for SupaChef.

Oh, that's fantastic! Well done, you!

It's down to you, you gave me the push!

-Do you know what you're going to cook yet?

-I've got a couple of ideas, but I've got to settle on one.

Are you nervous about the judges?

When they taste it and look at each other...

Course! I've been practising all night!

You'll be able to judge for yourselves at coffee break!

Can't wait.

I admire your ambition, Mrs Hollins.

Chris, hey!

Ooh! Looking casual!

Don't ask. You all right?

Yeah. Except I'm getting really paranoid that I've failed everything again.

-Don't be mad.

-Where are you going?

Builder's yard out on the trading estate.

Pick up some stuff for the old man.

Bo-ring! Hang out with me instead.

Or I'm calling that!

Go on. You know you want to.

Come into town for a bit. I've got to get some special food for my mum

because she's doing - wait for it... SupaChef.

Ha! She any good?

Put it this way. She'll probably put tissues on the list. And gin.

I can always use them when I get my results.

I don't know what you're worrying for.

Just cos you know YOU'VE passed.

Not necessarily.

Er, "Winner of the sixth-form art prize"...

OK. I'm yours.

-For a bit, anyway.

-Thanks.

Do you think we'll both get into Slade?

Depends if you've passed.

-Shut up!

-Course you've passed!!

Oh, there's our bus.

Good morning.

What are you doing here?

I have to catch up on the data input for Dr Clay's audit.

On your day off? You're a saint.

Hardly. I'm taking a day off in lieu.

What's this?

It is the church jumble sale on Saturday, so I have been baking.

Unfortunately I got a little carried away.

So I have brought some in for everybody.

There's no need, actually. I've brought some in!

Well, that is good! There is plenty!

We can have them at coffee time.

Result. Sweet potato.

See, beats being at the builders' yard, doesn't it?

Yeah, except they don't sell wood in the grocers.

Wood, what do you want wood for?

To make a cabinet.

Really? Oh, I completely forgot you did that.

Yeah. Knock one up from time to time. Few quid.

You should sell that sculpture you got the prize for. It was amazing.

Can't see anyone buying that thing.

Anyway, I thought you were going for your dad. To the builders' yard.

Huh? Oh...yeah. Well, he thinks we're making more of the cabinets.

Like, loads.

Bless him!

Says he's getting "Gordon & Son" sprayed on his van.

You, riding round in a van with your old man!

Good money.

You're not serious?

That's the whole point of going! Get away from your parents.

-Yeah, I know.

-It'll be good for you after everything that happened last year.

What?

Sorry! Nothing.

Right.

Venison shanks.

Right, then. Ta-dah!

There's a little bit of almond in there.

Oh! They look delicious!

Now, if you have any room left, you can try one of these.

Wow, they look fantastic!

Thank you!

Hey! It's a bit of a bake-off between...

No, it isn't.

Absolutely delicious.

Can I try one...?

Thank you.

SHE COUGHS AND SPLUTTERS

Thank you.

That'll be me, that will, when I fail.

Don't think so.

Or even when I pass, knowing my luck!

Point is, you make cool stuff.

Yeah, I suppose it's not all about the cash.

And she had two quid in her hat at least.

You'd do better than that. Probably have a fiver by now.

Very true. And at least I'd be an artist.

Come on.

I think I'm going to save these until tea-time.

Shame.

Well, I must say, real prize-winners.

In fact, you should do that thing that Karen -

-what's it called again?

-Want to try one of these?

She doesn't need my advice, her buns are very nice as it is!

-This is a little bit awkward.

-Sorry?

Can I ask a favour?

Yes. How can I help?

-It's about the SupaChef thing.

-Oh, yeah?

Could you not tell Mrs Tembe about it?

-What?

-See, the thing is, she can already cook! She doesn't need it.

Whereas I... I need to push myself through the learning thing.

Right.

So, just keep it between us?

Mmm.

MOBILE BEEPS

Where do you reckon we're going to get fresh rosemary from?

The garden centre, maybe?

You all right?

Chris, are you OK? You look shaky. Do you want to sit down for a bit?

Chris, you've gone really pale. Let me get you a burger.

Better?

Thanks.

Hey. Remember that old joke -

"what do you say to someone with a first class honours degree in art?"

"Burger and fries, please."

No way! Ollie Archer.

Yeah. Exactly. See, where did it get him?

They screened his degree show at college.

Brilliant. All those sculptures made out of scrap...

-Yeah, I know, but...

-That's cool!

-What is?

We can flip burgers and still be artists!

Uh-huh.

He always did look the part. That's what I'm saying.

It doesn't matter if you sell your sculpture or not.

You'll always be an artist, Chris. Because you know you've got the talent.

All finished!

I might as well go home, I think.

No problem.

Now, I have to do some food shopping over the weekend.

All this cooking for the church!

Every time I say "never again!"

But the truth is - I love it!

Karen, I'm not very comfortable about keeping this food thing a secret.

You heard her, obviously means a lot to her.

But she's got loads of things like this.

Um, she... Every weekend, she goes hospital visiting.

Home visits for the elderly, flowers for the church...

She's got people thanking her all the time,

telling her how brilliant she is.

Which is great. But me, on the other hand...

Well, my kids are about to fly the nest.

My husband is like a bear with a sore head most of the time,

my self-esteem is through the floor, you have no idea what it's like.

I understand.

I don't think you do.

You should try being a woman my age.

Anyway, the point is, I could really do with this.

And if Mrs Tembe takes part, I don't stand a chance.

Fine.

"Forage wild mushrooms." Seriously. She's losing it.

Listen to this.

"As exam fever hits town, thousands of students are on tenterhooks to see if they've passed or failed.

"The pressure on these youngsters gets worse every year,

"says Local MP Anne Strangely,

"commenting that every year students are even driven to suicide by the prospect of failure."

Just don't get that at all.

Chris, I'm so sorry, I wasn't even thinking!

It's fine.

It was just a hot bath, handful of pills, nee naw nee naw,

stomach pump, Dad seriously freaked - the end.

I'm not that person any more. I never even was that person.

-If you ever...

-I won't.

But if you ever do, will you call me?

I won't.

Won't do it? Or you won't call me?

Come on.

Why can't she just buy mushrooms like everybody else?

PHONE RINGS

'Please leave your message after the tone.'

Chris? Just wondered how you got on up at Gleesons.

I'd have loved to have seen their faces when you walked in.

Anyway, give us a call back if you get a chance, eh?

Are you OK?

Fine.

So you ARE worried about the results.

No!

Chris, out of all the people in our year,

you are the one that is guaranteed not to fail art.

Yeah. Maybe.

Not everyone's as lucky as you. You've got a guaranteed ticket out of here!

Not everyone wants the same thing though, do they?

Er, yeah, they do! Do you think there's anyone on our course

that wants to fail and stay in Letherbridge and work in a cafe?

Going to art college don't guarantee a good job, though.

Look at Ollie Archer.

You could always work for your dad!

Joke! As if!

Are you still going to specialise in wood carving after your first year?

Chris. What are you doing?

I'm sorry. I can't. I can't, I'm sorry.

Chris, come here!

-Leave me alone.

-Chris!

I will see you tomorrow, Mrs Hollins.

Bye-e-e!

Ooh, what's this?

My menu. I think I've finally cracked it! For SupaChef.

That cooking competition?

You're entering that?

Come on, then. Tickle my taste buds.

SHE CLEARS THROAT

Slow-roasted shank of wild venison

with a juniper berry, wild garlic, rosemary and red wine jus,

accompanied by hand-foraged wild mushroom fricassee.

That is not bad. You're doing the wild ingredients thing, then?

That's the way it's done nowadays.

You don't have to tell me that, some of us actually have experience of fine dining,

as opposed to the world of frozen pizza and chips.

You know that course we did on violence in the workplace?

Only kidding! You're really taking this seriously, aren't you?

OK. What vegetables are you going to have with your venison?

It's got the mushrooms.

Are they a vegetable?

Course they are! Aren't they?

Excuse me, mate, can I help you?

No. No, it's OK.

But mushrooms are the only vegetable. Is that OK, do you think?

-Mushrooms aren't a vegetable, are they?

-What else are they?

I dunno. Fungus? Do you have to have a vegetable?

Yes!

Why don't you try cabbage? MOBILE RINGS

Listen, I've got to go, my phone's beeping.

Imogen. I just can't keep on doing what everyone else wants -

it's not going to happen. Why can't people just let me be what I want?

Cabbage? I'm not going to win...

any favours with cabbage.

You all right?

Yep. Got to go.

I forgot my basket. What is all this about mushroom and cabbage?

OK, it's time I sorted it, I know it is.

I've been putting it off for way too long.

-VOICEMAIL:

-'Imogen, listen.

'That wasn't ME, OK?

'I can't keep doing what everyone else wants. It's not going to happen...'

Um... Jack's got a posh girlfriend coming for tea,

and Dad's a barrister.

Oh, my!

And Immie was suggesting cabbage.

To go with what?

Um... Roast wild venison.

Oh, wild!

Well, you are going to need something with a "wow" factor to go with such a fine ingredient.

Maybe something also wild, from the field, maybe?

See, that's what I said!

Stinging nettles.

No, no, seriously!

Young nettles, blanched.

Into cold water so they keep that vibrant green colour.

Then sauteed in butter.

For not too long, one or two minutes.

And a little squeeze of lemon.

Perfect.

Now that - THAT! - is the "wow" factor.

I will go and put the kettle on now that I have missed my bus.

Chris. It's me. Where are you?

Don't do anything stupid. Please call me back!

DOORBELL RINGS

Chris! Chris!

Chris! What are you doing?!

Why?

-It's just easier.

-Easier than what?

It's because your dad thinks you're going to stay here and work with him, isn't it?

You haven't told him you're going to art college.

-I'm not going to college.

-You are! You have to.

-I don't want to!

-You're an artist, Chris! A real artist...

I hate it! All that.

Yeah, I can do it! But I hate that there's no limits.

Makes me feel ill.

The stupider you make something, the louder they clap.

The teachers are the worst.

It's cos they haven't got a clue what's good.

So, what do you want to do?

Make things I want to make.

Sell it!

When you sell something, you know its value.

I like that.

Makes me feel good.

With your dad?

I need to talk to him about it all.

He's gone off with the idea we're starting some production line,

bashing stuff out.

I'm not up for that. Not at all.

HE SIGHS

It's difficult, though, letting him down.

I will stay and help you to tell him, if you want?

It's hard, isn't it?

Going away's what everyone wants to talk about.

Sometimes you just want to be like everyone.

It's hard to be different...

..and then it all builds up and it's too late to say.

Any minute now.

-What are you doing?

-Nettle for my mad mum.

Here he is.

Got to grasp it.

Corny or what?!

What's this? Welcoming committee?

Yeah...!

-Dad...

-What is it?

What's wrong?

It's OK.

Did you go to the yard, then?

No...

Yeah...no.

What?

I don't want to work like that, Dad.

Ah. What, you don't want to work with me?

You mean you don't want to work with me? You've only got to say!

I do want to work with you, Dad. I really do.

But is it OK if...?

-What I want is...

-Go on.

I need to decide what I'm doing, whether it's one or 50 or something different.

I just want to design the pieces, but...

You want me to do all the work?

Designing them is hard!

Coming up with something of quality that people actually want to buy.

All right, all right, son, calm down. We can talk about this, OK?

I didn't tell you before, but I got into art school,

a really good one. And if I get the grades...

You what? Why the hell didn't you...?

I can't just stay and be your skivvy, Dad.

He wants to stay.

But on my terms.

OK. Well, if that's what you want.

I want to help you, Dad, help the business, but...

He's just been so busy trying to keep everyone else happy.

I get it. Listen, nothing's happened, has it? You know...

No, Dad. It's all good.

With the nettles, do you cook the stalks as well?

No, just the tender young leaves. Tastes like spinach!

Got any left?

They look fantastic!

Help yourself. They have to be eaten!

Had a good day, love?

Yeah. Solved the meaning of life. Found that exams don't matter.

-Trying to tell us something?

-Got you everything you want, including the...

-Ow!

Nettles!

You got them! I hope she enjoys them.

-"She"?

-Is that the time?

-The lady...

-I think that we should be making a move.

Come on, then. This is lovely.

You should enter the SupaChef thing! Give Karen some competition.

You are entering a competition?

The cookery thing that Letherbridge News are running...

SupaChef.

What it was...

You were trying to keep this from me?

HE CLEARS THROAT

Sorry.

I gave you my recipes!

I expect they'll do it again next year.

Next year?

Applications close in half an hour.

So I don't think you'd have time to write a recipe and send it in.

And a personal statement.

Please.

Stand aside.

(Thank you.)

May the best woman win.

Yeah. It's going to be mental. See you there.

Well?

My problem is we put all our cash into this business.

And I'm not going home with empty pockets.

I hand pick all my drivers.

I wouldn't employ anyone who cut any corners.

I can't see what this has got to do with The Mill.

You need to talk to him, Cherry.

I can't.

Well?

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