Potato Head Doctors


Potato Head

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A new mop.

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I clean wore the old one out, along with my knee.

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Mary's got one, I'm sure,

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but I don't want her to think I'm taking advantage.

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Her sister's garden hasn't got much going for it, has it?

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Could have done with you, a bit of strong arm to dig it over.

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And this would've been so much easier with your help. But...

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if you'd been here, then I wouldn't have to move, would I?

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-Thanks.

-Want me to take your bag?

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If you can manage.

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Morning. Do you need a hand?

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I've got it covered, thanks.

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Morning.

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Hello.

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Hello!

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You just said that.

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No, the second one is, "Hello, is that a new shirt?"

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Yes, it is.

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Hmm. Colours and stripes, quite a departure.

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It's not quite right, is it?

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On the contrary, I think it suits you perfectly.

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And it steals Heston's thunder into the bargain.

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You're supposed to be taking it easy. We've had this talk.

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There's no time for "easy".

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The contracts are being exchanged. I have to leave here tomorrow,

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and there's still arrangements to make.

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Hasn't your sister been helping?

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Oh, she's been coming over when she can, but she still works.

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Pearl, it's going to take you longer to recover from your operation

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if you overdo it. You're setting yourself back.

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I should've postponed it,

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but it was all so fast, I had no way of knowing.

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Well, I'm here now, so you'll have to sit down. Come on.

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Hey, do you want some side plates?

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Sorry?

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Or a cake dish?

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I've got all this crockery, it's all going to goodwill.

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They're things we used to keep for Sunday tea.

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Knee first, Pearl.

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Oh, the old crock before the old crockery. Right.

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She's back.

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No? Beryl the Peril?

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Oh, yes. I've just checked my patient list for this afternoon.

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But she was only here Thursday, Friday?

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Friday?!

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Goodness, she's back as fast as her restless leg syndrome will carry her.

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"Oh, Doctor, it's like Riverdance are in my bed!

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-"The cat runs for the hills!"

-We shouldn't!

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"Last week it was all down this side,

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"this week it's all down this side."

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I felt like saying, "I bet you can't wait for next week."

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THEY LAUGH

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Do you think she can get Irish dance lessons on the NHS?

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Like tigers.

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-Sorry?

-Best viewed from a distance. That way you avoid a mauling.

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I like to see my colleagues happy at work. Nothing wrong with that.

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Oh, no. Too late with the warning, I see.

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Still, Dr Reid is very, er, "kitten with a whip", isn't she?

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-Haven't you got patients to see, Dr Haskey?

-Absolutely.

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Only, er, do what you can to avoid becoming one of them, eh?

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You look like a bleeder to me.

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Mr Deakins?

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Mrs Hollins, what's Dr Reid's schedule like for today?

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-It's full, why?

-Would you mind...?

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It was orange and brown when we first moved in.

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-In here?

-Very '70s.

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You had to be here, I suppose. I wasn't keen, it was so gloomy.

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-I can imagine.

-We couldn't afford to decorate all at once,

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so we did this room first. Earnest used to come back from the barber's,

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barely stop for his tea and he'd be up a ladder.

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Everything's healing OK, but you have got to stop overdoing it, Pearl.

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A whole lifetime of memories.

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I'm the only one that remembers.

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What's it matter?

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There's cold comfort in that.

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How does that feel? OK?

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Mmm.

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When did he go?

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Who? Earnest?

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He's still here. They're coming for him soon.

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Aren't they, love?

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Why don't you come in and say hello?

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Hello, Earnest.

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Oh, it's yes/no questions these days, if you can even get an answer.

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Most days he doesn't seem to know who I am.

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-When did that start?

-It was quite sudden.

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I went in for my operation and he was in respite.

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-He had a seizure.

-Oh, Pearl, I'm so sorry.

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Well, I've just had to accept it.

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Even with the care workers visiting every day,

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it's just got beyond me to cope.

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Much as I try.

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-Bye, now.

-Thank you.

-Take care.

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Hiya.

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Back again? I've barely touched my coffee.

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I meant to ask you what you wanted for lunch.

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Don't worry about it, I'll sort myself out.

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-I can get it.

-I can manage.

-Why, when you don't have to?

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Because I want to. I'd quite like the exercise.

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If I go, you can't break the other one, can you?

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Daniel.

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Daniel!

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I'm not holding you up, am I?

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No, no. I'm OK for time.

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There's a special cup for Earnest.

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It should be me doing that.

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Er, not on my watch.

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You can't take on the whole world all of the time.

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Earnest is going to need you fighting fit.

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I need him more than he needs me.

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He's gone, for all intents and purposes.

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You mustn't think like that.

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Well, I can't help it, sometimes.

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Everything's gone with him. Our marriage, our home.

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-Care like that costs.

-I know.

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I've had to sell all his things,

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all the old stuff he'd collected over the years.

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-Like what?

-His old jazz records.

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"It's my only other love," he used to say,

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but I knew it was his first love.

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You could put me in a room with Louis Armstrong,

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he'd tear himself in two to know who to go to.

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Oh, Louis Armstrong. Now you're talking.

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Oh, I used to pretend I liked all that old stuff.

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Now I don't have to bother. Small compensation.

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And I kept the most important thing.

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DOORBELL RINGS

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-Oh, that'll be them.

-Oh, no, no, no. You take your time. I'll get it.

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Mandy?

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-Russell.

-Can't think why you'd be needed for an official handover.

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Is there something I should know?

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No, no, I'm just taking care of Mrs Pike.

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Anyway, is Earnest all ready?

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Here we are now, all set? We can do that, Pearl.

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How's the knee holding up?

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Oh, it's fine, Russell. Is his room ready?

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Absolutely. We're looking forward to having him. Hello, Earnest.

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Yes.

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-He's taking you on a little trip, all right?

-Yes.

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Hey, hey, hey! Careful, you'll have his arm off.

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-Have you got his medication?

-Oh, yes. Mandy, it's on the table there.

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Potato head.

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What's that now, Earnest?

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Sounded like "potato head" to me.

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Yes, he's said that a couple of times before.

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New one on me. Mind you, I've been called a few things in my time.

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Where would he have got that from?

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What, what do you mean?

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Has somebody called him that at the home? Russell?

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Look, my staff know better than that. We run a nice place.

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-I should hope so.

-If I thought somebody had called him that...

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Well, somebody hasn't, OK? I promise.

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Righto, wagons roll.

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Because if somebody had called him that, I'd have their job.

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Hasn't he been robbed of his dignity enough as it is?

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If I caught anyone saying anything like that,

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they'd have me to answer to, before they were sacked.

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-Better keep your ears open then, eh?

-This isn't helping Pearl.

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-Potato head!

-You're going to your nice room.

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You know, the lovely one where the...

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Where the sun shines and all your friends are there.

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Oh, Mandy, there's a photo on the dining room wall...

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I'll get it.

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I'll be following right after.

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Why don't you give us a couple of hours, let us get him settled?

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Come for lunch, we'll have the kettle on.

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Well, if you think that's for the best...

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I'm thinking of what's best for you as well as Earnest.

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He's not being mistreated, I swear on my life.

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There you go.

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Well, would you look at that, eh? The man himself.

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Always took pride of place in his shop.

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Well that's what we'll give it in his room.

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All right. We'll see you later.

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I won't be long.

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That cup of tea you made will be getting cold.

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SHE SOBS

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Whoa, whoa, whoa!

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What? I'm not a complete invalid.

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I'm not saying you are, it's just your crutches are there, and you're here.

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I've been sitting down for the best part of five hours.

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If I don't get some exercise I'll have a whole different set of problems.

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Just as well I bought you a Greek salad, then.

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I told you I wanted to get some exercise.

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OK, if it's a little light stretching you want,

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I can go and see if the store cupboard's free...

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OK. Compromise. Hotel?

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A hotel room booked for the hour under the name Mr and Mrs Smith?

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Not appropriate any more.

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I meant what I said last week.

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It was a joke.

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Although I do think "appropriate" should mean whatever we want it to.

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Thanks for my salad.

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It was total waterworks.

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Pearl crying her eyes out, me trying not to join in.

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I had her in with me just before her op.

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She really didn't want to go through with it. Poor thing.

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-Which one has he gone to?

-Kingsvale.

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-Oh, that's near me. It's nice.

-It's one of the best.

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Yeah, well, they're only as good as their staff, aren't they?

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I've come across his main carer before,

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and there's just something I do not like about him.

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You know, calls his patients "units", that sort of thing.

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Yeah, I know the sort.

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I mean, I'm sure he's good with Earnest, but...

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How bad's his Alzheimer's?

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Oh, it's pretty bad.

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It's terrifying.

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Can you imagine what it must be like to be there and not "be there"?

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Which is worse, going through it yourself,

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or watching somebody you love go through it? If it was Rob...

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Oh, don't. Poor Pearl.

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I did some of my training with Alzheimer's patients

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and it's really interesting to see the cognitive therapy.

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-They use music with some of them.

-Oh, right.

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The music taps into long-term memory or something?

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Yeah. It's more miss than hit, but it makes a big difference

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with the patients that have no interaction.

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Mmm. I don't know if that would work with him.

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He's quite far down the road, he's almost totally dependent.

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With music, I mean, sometimes it's so vivid,

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it can take you right back.

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For me, it's school days and David Essex.

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Who?

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Back in the dark ages when records were records

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and they had different speeds, 33 and 45.

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-78...

-Oi! I'm not that old!

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David Essex?

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Yeah! Gorgeous. I used to kiss his poster every night.

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Oh, please tell me "poster" isn't slang for something.

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Come on.

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Come on, you must be here somewhere.

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What you doing?

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Just an idea.

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All I need is a blank CD and a little Louis.

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No way!

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What?

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Oh. Room for one more?

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It can get a bit much in there, can't it?

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Like being in the bunker with Adolf and Eva.

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Course, when it really gets too much for me

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I prescribe myself a trip to the pub and get completely battered.

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There's nothing like a bit of self-prescribed single malt!

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Sometimes, you've got to cut your losses and say...

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You don't want to talk.

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It's nothing personal.

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It's OK.

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I'm used to it.

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Is it all right? They said at reception to come straight through.

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Earnest, look who's here!

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We're just finishing lunch. Is it important?

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Well, I was in work chatting with a colleague about Earnest,

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and he was telling me about music therapy he'd seen used with Alzheimer's patients...

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-We've tried that.

-One of the first things we did, wasn't it, Pearl?

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We knew how much he loved his music.

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He was aware that the music was playing

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but he didn't seem to notice, not like he used to.

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But have you tried anything specific?

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Yeah. Pearl helped me draw up a whole list of things,

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his favourite songs, things they danced to at their wedding.

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We do know what we're doing.

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Look, I appreciate what you're trying to do,

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but I've stopped hoping, Mandy.

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It's hard, but I've come to realise that this isn't my Earnest now.

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Look, please, just one track. I think it's important.

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And I think you don't understand what it takes to do this job.

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You've got to be firm and unsympathetic. It doesn't mean you don't care.

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I think you'll want to hear this, too.

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JAZZ MUSIC PLAYS

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-See?

-Just... Just give it a second.

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It rarely has a reaction.

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MUSIC CONTINUES

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HE TAPS THE RHYTHM

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Oh.

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You remember this one, Earnest, don't you?

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Well...I don't believe it!

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What's this one called? I don't remember this.

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It's by Louis Armstrong and it's called Potato Head Blues.

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Potato Head.

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Because she enjoys holding it over your head.

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She wants power, the cow.

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I...

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I know, love.

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I'll see you later.

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Have you had any dealings with that O'Neil woman down the station?

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-No, why?

-She's just making Rob's life difficult, that's all.

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This box seems a bit light...

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In fact, I'm supposed to be seeing Beryl Hobbs this afternoon, she's not in here.

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-Karen, have I got more notes to come?

-No.

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Is there something wrong, Karen?

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Not that I'm aware of.

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Karen, what's going on?

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Nothing. Really.

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OK. Howard has been asking us to lighten your load a bit.

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Since when?

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It's been going on for a while now. Howard's orders.

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-Right, well, we'll see about that.

-He's not back from lunch yet.

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But I can tell him that you want to see him when he's back in.

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No, don't. Why ruin the surprise?

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MUSIC: "Potato Head Blues" by Louis Armstrong

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'56.

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-What?

-Don't forget, yes/no questions.

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Louis. I saw Louis.

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I think he means 1956.

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Earnest, yes, that's when you got this photo signed!

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I snuck out. I was ten.

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And he played this, didn't he?

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Potato Head Blues.

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Louis, at Birmingham.

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Yeah.

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# I got the heebie jeebies... #

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Oh, that's another track I found!

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# I got the heebie jeebie blues... #

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'56.

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'56.

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Me...

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and Louis!

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What else did he play?

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# When you're...smiling. #

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I snuck out.

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This is best he's been for ages! I didn't think...

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Don't get emotionally involved, eh?

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Thank you for giving him back to me.

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Oh, this means everything!

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Now we can have some kind of life together.

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-Well, yeah, but...

-That's not how Alzheimer's works, Pearl.

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But look at him. I mean, it's nothing short of incredible.

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Don't get me wrong, this is brilliant and it really will help,

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but Earnest will have days when it won't.

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Music's a therapy, Pearl, it's not a cure.

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It's just one of these things.

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-But look at him!

-Pearl, look...

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No! You've given me hope

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-but now you're trying to snatch it away!

-It's not like that.

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To see him like this after all that time, and then you say that?

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What's the point?!

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Pearl, you can't get upset. Seeing you upset can upset him. Look.

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Play it again for him. Please.

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MUSIC RESUMES

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I think this is my favourite, too, Earnest.

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Here we go.

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I've really messed up, haven't I?

0:18:590:19:01

Look, everybody wants miracles with Alzheimer's

0:19:020:19:05

when there are none, you know that.

0:19:050:19:07

This is what I mean about being unsentimental.

0:19:070:19:10

MUSIC CONTINUES

0:19:100:19:14

HE WHISTLES

0:19:170:19:20

MUSIC: "La Vie en Rose" by Louis Armstrong

0:19:290:19:31

Oh, careful.

0:19:310:19:33

-Russell?

-Here we go, here we go.

0:19:330:19:36

# Hold me close and hold me fast

0:19:400:19:45

# The magic spells you cast

0:19:450:19:48

# This is la vie en rose

0:19:480:19:54

# When you kiss me heaven sighs

0:19:540:19:59

# And though I close my eyes... #

0:19:590:20:02

-What's the matter? Do you want to stop?

-No.

0:20:020:20:05

HE HUMS ALONG

0:20:050:20:08

# When you press me to your heart

0:20:080:20:12

# I'm in a world apart. #

0:20:120:20:16

I believe it was me...

0:20:160:20:17

DOOR SLAMS

0:20:170:20:19

-Do I look like I'm made of china?

-One moment, I'm just on...

0:20:190:20:22

He'll call you back.

0:20:220:20:24

-What are you playing at?

-My point exactly.

0:20:240:20:26

What do you think you're doing, taking my patients away?

0:20:260:20:29

As manager, I have the welfare of my staff to consider.

0:20:290:20:32

We both know why you're doing it, and why you wouldn't do it for anybody else.

0:20:320:20:35

-That's not true.

-You've made me look ridiculous!

0:20:350:20:38

I don't know why you don't get the fainting couch into my consulting room and be done with it!

0:20:380:20:43

-Now, wait...

-Not to mention acting like a hypocrite!

0:20:430:20:46

If anyone else had done this, you'd come down on them like a ton of bricks!

0:20:460:20:49

If anybody else had gone through what you have, they might accept help when it was offered!

0:20:490:20:54

I am not a charity case!

0:20:540:20:56

I don't need your help. Now, back off and let me do my job!

0:20:560:21:00

-Everything all right?

-Fine.

0:21:030:21:05

SHE SIGHS

0:21:050:21:06

Karen, could you do me a favour, please?

0:21:060:21:09

Could you put my patient list back to how it was, please,

0:21:090:21:13

with the full knowledge and consent of Mr Bellamy?

0:21:130:21:17

Yeah.

0:21:170:21:19

Thank you.

0:21:190:21:21

I appreciate YOUR help.

0:21:210:21:23

Oh, Mandy.

0:21:270:21:29

I'm sorry.

0:21:290:21:31

I was rude and ungrateful, and I had no right.

0:21:310:21:34

Just...forget about it.

0:21:340:21:36

Thank you for what you did.

0:21:360:21:38

He's happy, I think, and that's all down to you.

0:21:380:21:43

Well, I've got more of him now than I've had for ages.

0:21:440:21:46

Today's an extra day I didn't think I'd have.

0:21:460:21:49

Well, there'll be plenty more of those, I'm sure.

0:21:490:21:52

You just have to treasure them when they come along.

0:21:520:21:55

Bye, Pearl.

0:21:570:21:59

Here's the rest of your workload, save Karen bringing them in.

0:22:040:22:07

-Thank you.

-Anything else, you can go through her or Mrs Tembe.

0:22:070:22:10

As far as I'm concerned, you can do what you like.

0:22:100:22:13

It's not a case of doing what I like, it's a case of doing what I'm here for.

0:22:130:22:16

All I've done is be supportive.

0:22:160:22:18

Yes, I care for you, I admit it.

0:22:180:22:21

You don't want that? That's your choice.

0:22:210:22:23

Find yourself another kicking post.

0:22:230:22:25

You all right?

0:22:330:22:35

Yeah.

0:22:350:22:37

Oh, no. Just thinking about Pearl.

0:22:370:22:40

Sounds like you did a great job to me.

0:22:400:22:42

Not that. It's... If you had one more day with someone, what would you do?

0:22:420:22:47

It depends. Would I know I had one more day with them?

0:22:470:22:51

Oh, sorry, I didn't mean...

0:22:510:22:52

It's all right, you can say it. "If I had one more day with Dad..."

0:22:520:22:55

Cos that's who I'd choose.

0:22:550:22:57

I'd be the same with Freya.

0:22:570:22:59

You think you'd be like, OK, all-night dancing, partying,

0:22:590:23:03

drinking, but...it's the things you wish you'd found out before.

0:23:030:23:08

The things you've never had the answers to.

0:23:090:23:12

You never know how much time you've got.

0:23:140:23:17

Your chariot awaits, milady, whenever you want.

0:23:220:23:25

I thought we could get a takeaway or something.

0:23:250:23:27

Shut the door.

0:23:290:23:31

Sit down.

0:23:330:23:35

You changed your mind about stretching?

0:23:360:23:39

I...

0:23:420:23:43

I've been thinking, and I think that coming back to Letherbridge...

0:23:460:23:51

..was not a great idea after all.

0:23:530:23:55

In what way?

0:23:550:23:57

In practically every way.

0:23:570:23:59

A clean break might have been the kindest thing for both of us.

0:23:590:24:02

I disagree.

0:24:020:24:04

I'm sorry.

0:24:040:24:05

What brought this on?

0:24:050:24:07

Are you serious? After everything I said about not being able to trust you?

0:24:070:24:10

We talked that through. You just need more time.

0:24:100:24:13

No.

0:24:130:24:15

Look, I'm really grateful for all the help you've given me over this whole stupid ankle thing,

0:24:150:24:20

but I think that it has created a renewed level of intimacy that...

0:24:200:24:25

That you think I've read too much into? I haven't.

0:24:250:24:28

Regardless, I have decided that, once I've recovered, I'm going to leave the practice. For good.

0:24:280:24:33

OK, right.

0:24:330:24:35

So, forget the partnership that you fought for, all the extra money that you put in.

0:24:350:24:40

-You'll walk away from all of that, and from us?

-There is no "us"!

0:24:400:24:44

And if it means walking away from the partnership,

0:24:440:24:47

-then I'm prepared to do that then, yeah.

-No discussion, nothing?

0:24:470:24:51

What good would that do?

0:24:510:24:53

I'm sure that, when you think about it,

0:24:560:24:59

you'll have to agree it's for the best.

0:24:590:25:01

# Oh, when you're smilin'

0:25:030:25:08

# When you're smilin'

0:25:100:25:14

# The whole world smiles with you

0:25:170:25:25

# Yes, when you're laughin'

0:25:270:25:31

# When you're laughin'

0:25:340:25:38

# Yes, the sun comes shinin' through

0:25:400:25:47

# But when you're cryin'

0:25:500:25:55

# You bring on the rain

0:25:560:26:01

# So stop your sighin', baby

0:26:030:26:07

# And be happy again

0:26:090:26:13

# Yes, and keep on smilin'

0:26:130:26:18

# Keep on smilin', baby

0:26:200:26:25

# And the whole world smiles with you. #

0:26:280:26:36

-Call me Emma.

-Emma Reid? Has the investigation been reopened?

0:26:430:26:47

It's not paranoia, is it, if something's actually going on?

0:26:470:26:50

-Nothing's going on.

-What's going on, Anya?!

0:26:500:26:52

Hopefully we can get her in the refuge before this one gets home.

0:26:520:26:55

I wasn't going to hit her.

0:26:550:26:57

She was going to leave, take my little girl away.

0:26:570:26:59

Check this one out. This guy thinks you've got a sexy voice.

0:26:590:27:02

'And she's going to take you all the way.'

0:27:020:27:06

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:27:270:27:30

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