Big Fish Doctors

Lewis.

What are you doing? Open the door.

Have you seen the time?

Half the day's gone. And you're sleeping your life away.

Yeah, yeah, whatever.

Don't you "whatever me".

And what's with all this locking your door?

I'm getting dressed.

You ain't got nothing I ain't seen before.

Something you want, Dad?

You need to get a job.

-All right, I'll have a look around.

-Make sure you do.

-What're you hiding in there?

-Nothing.

-You better not be. Do you hear me?

-I hear you.

And don't be locking this door.

How dare you. Who do you think you're talking to?

How dare you! Some half bit of a kid tells me I can't wash properly,

-and you tell me to calm down.

-Kay.

Kay!

-You ought to be...

-Kay, pack it in and get your backside in my room.

So that's ten past five with Doctor Haskey.

OK. Bye, Mr Folds.

Dr Haskey.

Dr Al Haskey, Dr Haskey.

Did you want something, Dr Donoghue?

Hi. Um... Just wondering if you got the...?

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That, um...that particularly peaked my interest.

Get a room!

Karen, is Howard about?

Um, no, he's in with a stationery rep.

Do you want me to pass on a message?

No, I need to see him.

I better make an appointment, then.

An appointment? That sounds serious, is everything all right?

When's he free?

Um...

He said I had fungus.

I'm not a mushroom.

It's a fungal infection, anyone can get it,

but it's common to get it under the boobs.

He said I didn't wash properly.

I know his sort, looking down his nose,

just cos I live round here.

Forget him, he's got no manners.

He can talk, with his bad breath.

Have you seen the hair he's got up his nose and in his ears?

-I mean...

-Kay! Shut your cake hole and listen.

He said you needed to wash more,

because you've got a fungal infection

that likes warm, moist areas.

Nice, hey?

So, yeah, give the girls a dip as often as you can,

keep the bacteria down. Got it?

All right, bossy boots.

And get the prescription he gave you for the cream.

He said I had to get a proper fitted bra,

to let the "air circulate in me regions".

You'd need a wind farm.

Here, do you want to buy a phone?

Where did he get 'em from? Second thoughts, don't tell me.

I'm off, then.

-Where're you going?

-Dad, chill. Your blood pressure, remember?

It's you that gets me all worked up.

-See ya.

-I don't want you hanging out on the streets all day.

Dad, please, just back off.

-All right, blud? You ready?

-Yeah.

Watch yer mate.

That's Mr Montgomery to you.

All right, keep your hair on.

The Peak District is amazing.

And the views from the B&B were to die for,

although we didn't spend much time admiring the views,

-if you know what I mean.

-I know.

We did venture out once or twice, though.

You know, give the springs a rest.

We saw the only multi-sailed fully functional windmill in England.

-So you had a good time, then.

-Didn't we just!

And I couldn't drag Al away from the brewery tour.

You went on a brewery tour?

Yeah. Sure, he was like a little child in a sweetshop, you know?

Um... I've got to get back on reception.

What happened to that girl?

-What?

-The girl that died.

Catriona? Mandy's friend?

What do you know?

Not a lot.

But what I do know is that she came in about a week ago,

wants to register, she saw Heston.

And then the next thing I know, she's committed suicide.

That's so sad.

I mean, I don't know the ins and outs of it,

but I don't think Mandy's best pleased with Heston.

Do you know? I've been cold all morning,

I should've put my thermals on.

Niamh was just telling me about her holiday with Al.

Ah. You'll have to tell me about it later.

Try stopping me.

She's seeing Howard, now.

Really?

I'd like to be a fly on the wall for that meeting.

I'm handing in my notice.

-You're...?

-Leaving, yeah.

Look, I know you're upset with the way Dr Carter dealt with

Catriona, but it's under review and I want you to know,

that there's going to be no stone left unturned.

I know, and if there are any lessons to be learned,

then we should all be made aware.

But especially Heston.

No. No, it's not fair to single him out.

You know, I missed the signs, too,

so if there's any blame to be dished out, then I'm just as guilty.

I'm going to apologise to Heston.

Why don't you take some time off, have a break?

I don't need one Howard, I've made my mind up.

I don't want you making any rash decisions.

I know how Catriona's suicide hit you hard.

Yeah, it did.

But it made me take stock, in a positive way. You know,

it's time to move on.

-Fancy going to The Bullet?

-I ain't got no dough.

Don't worry about that, I got me hands on some.

-Where from?

-You've just got to know where to look. It's easy, mate.

-Yeah, right.

-I'm serious.

You've just got to know where to look.

Anyway, I better get on.

Let me take you to lunch.

You're not going to change my mind, Howard.

No, it's something I'd like to do.

I want you to know how much you're appreciated by this practice

and by the patients.

Oh, well, when you put it like that, I can't say no, can't I?

We've run out of bog paper. I'm not using that rough stuff

that feels like sandpaper, so you'd better...

SIRENS

Now what?

Who've you got it in for this time, hey?

-HE OINKS

-Go on, get lost, you filthy pigs.

You know, you better watch it, copper,

you don't want to cause another riot with the naughty boys.

And have you been a naughty boy, Darren?

Me? Nah, not me.

Where have you been all morning?

-What's it got to do with you?

-Just answer the question.

Leave him alone!

-Did he touch you?

-No, I haven't touched him.

This is harassment.

An old man has been mugged just round the corner, and if your son

-has been hanging around, then maybe he saw who did it.

-Well, he ain't.

-So you can push off.

-Leave 'em alone, man.

No need to get involved, sir.

Don't tell me what to do, I live here.

That's right, you tell him. I'll deal with this, you get off home.

What are you going to do, arrest us all for breathing?

I won't ask you again.

Or what? Huh?

See, I ain't some kid you can just push around.

-It makes 'em feel big.

-All right, I get the picture -

you either can't or you won't help us.

-Either way...

-Just leave my son alone!

Oi, what've you been up to?

Lewis!

You all right, love.

No you're not, are you?

Come on, come on.

Here you go.

Oh, ta.

Did Al tell you what a great holiday we had?

I haven't really seen him yet.

It was amazing, just fantastic.

Good.

Could've stayed another week.

And Al was so sweet. Nothing was too much trouble.

-He was so attentive, so...

-I'm glad you had a good time.

-Would you like to see the photos?

-Uh...

Niamh, I would love to see the photos and chat about the holiday,

but I've got two case studies on my plate

and a coroner with a long list of questions, so I've got to go.

Sorry.

No, um... Another time, yeah?

I heard about Catriona. It's really sad.

Yeah. Yeah, it is.

Was she Heston's patient?

Yeah.

-Is that why he's leaving?

-Maybe.

-Do you think he will leave?

-Who knows?

-Thanks.

-It's up again. That's you mouthing off at the cops.

Why didn't you use your angina spray?

I was on my way to the chemists to get my repeat.

It's the second attack today.

Any reason why the other one come on?

-My boy.

-Lewis?

He's been hanging around with that Darren, him with the attitude.

Lewis ain't nothing like him.

Then why did he hide when the police were on the estate earlier?

-You asked him?

-I tried.

He had a lot of money on him.

That boy's up to something, and I've got to find out what it is.

He don't...

..he don't listen to me anymore.

It's OK. Calm down now. Come on.

Thank you.

So, have you told anyone else about you leaving?

Nope. I thought I'd tell you first.

Thank you. You're irreplaceable, you know that.

Oh, Howard, stop trying to butter me up.

If you think I'm going to let you go without a fight, you're wrong.

Seriously, change your mind.

I'm sure, given the circumstances, we can give you a little pay rise.

-A decent increment anyway.

-Oh, will you stop it?

Look, I am flattered, but it's time for me to go.

And if I'm honest,

I probably should've left when Freya died.

At times like that, you need your friends around you. And for

what it's worth, I think you did the right thing by sticking around.

She'd have been so angry about what happened to Catriona.

She'd have been trying to do something about it,

you know, trying to change peoples' views.

That was Freya, what about you?

Well, I think I might retrain,

use my current nursing skills and

maybe work in community relations or victim support.

I want to be there for people like Catriona.

You're talking like you don't already improve peoples' lives,

and you do. Ask your patients.

I mean every word.

Just be happy for me, will ya?

Goes without saying.

Right. I've written up a new rota.

My last day is...next Tuesday.

Next Tuesday?!

I'm going to need more time than that,

I can't find a nurse by the middle of next week!

Ta, I could've got home on my own, you know?

You're turning into a right old misery.

I'm not old.

-What're you doing here?

-Manners?

-He's got you here to talk to me, ain't he?

-Don't flatter yourself,

not everything revolves around you.

Thank you...for bringing me back from the surgery.

What you been to the docs for?

-My heart.

-You had a heart attack?

He wouldn't be sitting there if he had, dippy. It's his angina.

But next time it could be the real thing.

-If you just stopped getting all worked up.

-How can I

when I'm worried about you all the time?

But why? I've never got in trouble.

You haven't been caught, more like.

You've done nothing to get a job,

you just spend your days with that low life, Darren.

You hang out with animals, you're going to get fleas.

I don't believe this.

-We all know what it's like.

-Shouldn't you be nursing the sick?

All right, mouthy, where did the money come from?

-What money?

-The wad your dad saw you count before the cops arrived.

The cops you hid from. Come on, where'd you get it?

You want to keep your trap shut?

You having money and someone's just been mugged,

it don't look good, does it?

I didn't do it.

If I find out you did, I promise you, I'll...

Eugene.

I'll help you with the interviews.

What interviews? I've not even got the ball rolling yet.

I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to insist on one month's notice.

Howard, I've got three weeks holiday due.

-One more week?

-No!

You've got plenty of cover to bridge the gap.

Well, we're going to have to turn patients away.

Oh, no. No, don't try and pull that one,

you've got Tash.

Has my free lunch gone out the window or what?

Would it help if I said I've got someone in mind?

I wanted to tell everyone about our holiday,

but they've got more important things on their minds.

Mm. It's this suicide.

It's so awful.

Poor girl.

Yep.

But sometimes patients do that.

That's a bit of a cold thing to say.

Well, in the cold light of day, it's a fact.

One which we have to accept.

So, a patient of ours takes their own life,

and we shouldn't give it another thought, is that it?

I don't know. I think everyone's over-reacting.

Because they're not brushing it aside like you are?

We're professionals.

We see the bleak side of life and death every day.

We can't let something like this affect us.

If one of my patients committed suicide,

I would be devastated.

You can't save them all, Niamh.

Maybe not, but I would question myself.

Did I listen?

Did I do everything I could? Did I try to help?

I'd need to do that for my own peace of mind

and because I would NOT want to be in Heston's shoes right now.

Let me tell you something, we'll all be in Heston's shoes at one point

or another, you have to toughen up.

Take it on the chin.

Don't tempt me.

-Hiya, what're you doing back?

-Oi, you, four eyes. Will this do?

You should've nicked the choccy ones.

They melt.

-Did you hear about that old man being mugged?

-Yeah.

It was Mr Bidwell. He's in hospital with a broken rib.

He was just about to go to the shops and someone jumped on him

-in the stairwell.

-I'd like to jump on whoever did it.

He's an old man, this could finish him off.

You know what, this estate's gone right downhill since I moved here.

Nah, it's always been a dump.

-Do you want a biscuit?

-I'd love one.

Do you want to take a seat?

Right. Friday night - Icon, I want you to be there.

Oh, is it your birthday?

No... I'm leaving.

You're joking?!

No.

It's not anything to do with Heston, is it?

Oh, no. No, definitely not.

I've just handed in my notice. It's time for a change.

-Where're you going?

-I don't know!

Isn't that a bit risky?

I don't know. Mandy being risky, who'd have thought, eh?

Well, you've a month to find something, I suppose.

I finish next week.

Mand! You can't do this!

Spread the word around about Friday, yeah? The more, the merrier.

PHONE RINGS

-I didn't mug anyone.

-I didn't mean to stir it with you and your dad.

-Yeah, well, you did.

-He's worried about you.

How can me dad think I could mug someone?

-I didn't help, with my wooden spoon.

-It shouldn't make any difference.

He either knows me or he don't.

You should be made up he's looking out for you.

Is he going to be all right, with his angina?

It's not going to cause him a heart attack, is it?

He needs to calm down.

And look at what he eats and get more exercise.

It's all do-able, even for him.

-Where did you get the money from?

-What's it to you?

I'm not going to grass on ya if that's what you think.

I sold my phone, got a cheaper one instead.

-Why did you do that?

-I needed the money.

You owe someone?

-Spill.

-I can't.

-Why not?

Look, I've got to get out of here.

Lewis, what the hell have you got yourself into?

The police.

I'm going to be a copper.

-You've got to tell your dad.

-He'll blow his top.

-You'll be on the right side of the law.

-He's not going to be impressed.

You know what he's like, they get his back up.

Don't do it then.

I've always wanted to be a copper.

You must have a screw loose.

I've got this silly idea in me head -

I can change the way the police look at people like us.

-Don't hold your breath.

-Oi!

Get lost, Darren.

That mouth needs training, before someone fills it for ya.

Get out of her face, man! Catch up later.

He's a right charmer.

It ain't going to work, is it?

Me joining the police.

I'm going to turn the job down, save myself the aggro.

You lost your bottle?

I ain't a traitor.

Is this about the mugging?

Just leave it, yeah?

If it is, it shouldn't be about whose side you're on.

There you are.

The old picture house is showing Alfred Hitchcock's 1963 classic

The Birds tonight,

and I wondered if you fancied some killer seagulls.

-SHE SLAMS DOWN THE JAR

-I'll take that as a no.

Mandy's leaving.

That's an overreaction.

What was that?

If one of us quits every time a patient tops themselves,

we'll have no one left.

Maybe as a sign of solidarity I should hand my resignation in.

That's not a bad idea.

-Sorry?

-People have been deeply affected by Catriona's death,

and you're making light of it.

Not of her death, the reaction.

Niamh, we are responsible for thousands of patients.

What about them in all this?

Ultimately, they're the ones that lose out.

It's unprofessional for a doctor to become

so involved in a patient - unprofessional and weak.

So it's weak so show emotion? It's weak to show you're human?

A doctor can't afford to be emotionally involved in just

-one patient.

-Oh, right, because you didn't get emotionally involved

when you brought that school girl for an abortion!

-What did you have to hurt him for?

-What're you talking about, hurt who?

You know who. The old man you robbed this morning.

-I didn't do nothing.

-Don't lie to me.

He dropped the money and I picked it up.

-He's in hospital.

-So what? It's not my problem.

You didn't have to hurt him.

I needed the money.

You didn't have to hurt him.

I just roughed him up a bit.

-I hardly touched him.

-You shouldn't have done that, man.

You shouldn't have done that.

Hello, police...

-KNOCK ON THE DOOR

-Come in.

You know, I really should engage my brain before I open my mouth.

I'm sorry for hitting below the belt,

Emma told me about Fliss Henning.

Probably needed taken down a peg or two.

That's not why I did it.

I like THAT side of you, the side that tried to help the young girl.

It's this tough guy image - it's just so not you at all.

You realise we've had our first lovers' tiff?

We'll have to think of a way to make it up to each other.

And how do you suggest we do that?

What're you doing?

What does it look like?

I asked you a question.

The Police.

-I knew that you were...

-I didn't know how to tell you.

Dad?

A policeman?

Of all the things you could do with your life,

you choose the police?

-I knew you wouldn't be happy.

-Happy?

Have you seen the way some of them come around this estate,

playing it the big man?

It's us and them, it always has been, always will be.

But it shouldn't be like that.

-They talk to us like dirt.

-Not all of 'em.

Look at that one from the estate earlier,

he didn't stand a chance, he was only there to find out about a mugging.

-Already you're siding with them.

-I'm not siding with anyone,

I'm just being honest about what I see, like what you taught me.

Do you know what people on this estate think?

I don't care about them.

I care about what you think.

You know you're in for a hard time.

I've still got my training to do.

They still might kick me out.

What're you talking about?

They ought to think themselves lucky to have you.

Were you going to run away without telling me?

Nah.

I wouldn't do that, but I've got to go.

I can't stay here.

No son of mine runs away.

Get real, Dad,

I'll end up arresting half the estate.

And if you stay, you'll get the fall-out.

You better move.

No-one is hounding me out of my own home.

It's not just about becoming a copper,

it's about right now, Dad.

It's about what I see and what I hear and what I've got to do about it.

What're you talking about?

I just grassed up on my best mate.

PHONE RINGS

Hello.

Ayesha. It's Mandy.

Mandy, how're you going?

Yeah, I'm good, thanks.

I was just wondering if you'd given any more thought

to applying for this job.

-Were you serious?

-'Yeah, of course I was. But'

we're interviewing soon, so you'll have to be quick if you want it.

Nah, cheers all the same for thinking about me,

but it's not my scene.

'Why not?'

I wouldn't fit in.

They're not my sort of people, know what I mean?

No, not really.

I mean, you love being a nurse. That's all that matters, right?

If I work there, I'll have to get on with the posh docs

and patients. And if they started looking down their nose at me,

'I'll end up decking 'em.'

Well, you know, I think it's you looking down your nose at them.

'You're passing up a really good opportunity.

'You've got a chance of promotion.'

You could train to be a nurse practitioner.

But if you don't think

'you're up to it, fair enough.'

I didn't say that.

All right, well, Think about it. And you've got my number.

'Speak to you soon.'

You get your filthy hands off him, you pigs!

-SHOUTING:

-This was you, wasn't it?

Get in.

Come on, son.

I'll help you pack.

Love you, love you!

He's the heart, the very soul of this practice

but he cannot leave.

What are you talking about?

You know I've always had the deepest respect for you as a doctor.

I should never of blamed you for Catriona's death.

Rapid blood loss requires fast action,

and that is where my lightweight, self-inflating tourniquet comes in.