Hitting Home Doctors

Rory! Come on, we're already late.

All right. Remember, it's a half day today. OK?

So I'll pick you up at lunchtime.

Rory? OK?

Ah! I love the smell of fear in the morning.

Do you smell that, Jimmi? Smell that fear.

Virgin GP starts today.

Oh, yeah, I don't envy them. Remember your first day?

Of course. As do you.

I think we both know I made quite an impression.

What of? Someone with modesty?

-What do we know about them?

-Well, female, that's for certain.

And if my judgment is correct, a rather thoughtful,

discerning one at that.

Is this the geek?

I hope you're not using that as a pejorative term, Doctor Clay.

Someone you can take under your wing and guide through

-the difficulties of the day?

-If the role falls to me,

then so be it.

So is this the geek?

No.

Oh, dear.

Morning.

It's Doctor Clay, isn't it?

And...

This is Al, Al Haskey. And Jimmi.

Niamh Donoghue.

Well, what are we waiting for?

Can't stand around here all day!

I've got a good feeling about today, don't you?

Lucy...

Lucy!

-Stay away from me!

-You can't not let me see him.

Rory doesn't need you...and neither do I.

-You look like you haven't slept in days.

-I'm fine.

-I could help.

-I can cope.

-Can you? Really?

I want to see him, Lucy, I have rights.

I've seen a solicitor.

If this is the way you're going to be, I'm applying for custody.

I've tried to be reasonable, I've tried to talk to you...

If you won't let me see him, I want him with me.

Don't do this, Cameron. I mean it, don't!

I've got no choice.

I'll fight you for him if I have to.

-It doesn't have to be like this.

-Don't touch me!

I've been kind of busy the past couple of weeks.

Not with your job search, if this is anything to go by.

It's hard sometimes, you know, trying to get everything done,

looking after my son, never mind looking for work.

You've put no new applications anywhere for two weeks

and you've had no interviews?

I've been looking on the websites, but there's nothing going.

nothing I could do anyway, not around school hours.

I do want a job, honestly, I do.

But you've been too busy to actually do anything to find one?

Well, like I said, I've been looking on the websites I'm supposed to.

It's hard trying to fit everything in.

You probably know what it's like.

I know things can be difficult, but you still have to actively be

seeking employment in order to qualify for your benefits.

I know... And I am, honestly.

Looking at a few websites isn't enough, Mrs Coombs.

But you're aware of that, aren't you?

Because you've agreed to put in up to 20 hours a week

looking for work,

you've agreed to phone or visit two potential employers a week.

I know, I know, and I'll do more from now on. I will, honestly, I promise.

I'm afraid you're going to be sanctioned.

I'm sorry, but if you don't comply with your Jobseeker's Agreement,

then you're not entitled to benefits, it's that simple.

Now, this sanction will last for four weeks.

You can't take my money off me.

I'm afraid I can.

You'll get a letter explaining why this has happened

and you'll get the chance to appeal.

But I need that money! I'm on my own, I've got a child to feed.

I'm sorry, but I really don't have a choice on this.

OK, so if you'll give that a read, fill that in,

get it back to me tomorrow.

-Ah, this is...

-Karen, hello, how are you?

-Hiya. Nice to see you.

-Can you believe it? Seriously,

thank you so much, you were so good to me when I was

here for the interview, I wouldn't have got through it without you.

Oh, don't be silly.

And this is our other receptionist, Mrs Tembe.

You must have a first name I can call you?

Mrs Tembe?

Ah, yes... Sorry. Welcome, Doctor Donoghue.

If there is anything I can do for you, please just ask.

You can start by calling me Niamh.

I always think Doctor Donoghue makes me sound

like a character from one of those cheesy American medical dramas.

Well, Doctor Donoghue, like I said,

if there is anything I can do for you.

Right, I'll show you round.

When you get time, don't forget the online course, please.

Very important.

Mrs Coombs,

I've explained the situation,

will you now please leave? I have other people to see.

Are you OK?

Have you got kids?

Do you know what it's like not being able to feed them properly?

Maybe you don't. Maybe you don't know what it's like to have to go without

-so your child can eat.

-This really isn't helping anyone.

I think I'm being reasonable, I'm signing on,

I'm looking for work, all I want is my JSA.

Just tell me I'm going to get it and I'll go.

I wouldn't do that if I was you, seriously!

Get off me!

Go on, just try it, fatty.

That's it, that's enough, I'm calling the police.

Yeah, you do that. I'll go when I've got what I deserve.

Anyone else want to have a go, eh?

Gentlemen...

Now, these two lovely fellas I already know,

but I don't believe we've met?

And I think I would have remembered you.

Kevin, this is Niamh Donoghue, she'll be starting with us today.

Lucky us. You don't have to worry, we're a pretty good team.

Why would I be worried about that?

Having a patient drop dead on you on the first day, now that

would be something to worry about.

Yes, well, let's hope that doesn't happen.

Anything you need, my door's always open.

I'll be sure to remember that.

-Can I have a word?

-Can it wait?

So everyone's up to speed on the breast-feeding tutorial?

Though, you won't have to do it, obviously.

Zara, you've met.

Yes, of course. Remember, you're going to have to do the course, too,

even if you're au fait with breast-feeding. Are you?

Well, I've not actually done it myself...

I've had a few overeager boyfriends through the years.

OK. Well, Howard will show you the system,

I'm sure you'll get the hang of it.

That's your office.

I like her, she seems nice.

Seriously?

You don't think she was trying just that little bit too hard?

Do I sense disappointment that a certain OTHER candidate

-didn't get the job?

-Oh, Lord,

-I hope this isn't going to turn into a whole other...

-Another what?

Nothing.

That's her there. Lucy Coombs.

Lucy Coombs. OK, mate, we'll sort it. Thanks.

Lucy?

Lucy, I don't think this is the solution, do you, love?

I really don't want to have to arrest you.

I'm not going anywhere until I get my money.

Come on, love...

Get off me!

Lucy Coombs, I am arresting you for breaching the peace

and assaulting a police officer. You don't have to say anything

but it may harm your defence if you don't mention when questioned

something you later rely on in court. Anything you do say

may be given in evidence. Do you understand? Come on.

You all right?

Sign that.

Right, this way. Lucy! Lucy, are you all right?

Get the doctor. Lucy?

Right, that should be about it. Any questions?

Only, where's the panic button?

You know, if something goes horribly wrong?

I'm joking! I'll be grand.

Right. Well, I'll leave you to get settled in, shall I?

Remember, if there's anything you need...

I know where to find you.

Thank you, you've been absolutely great, I'll take it from here.

-KNOCK ON DOOR

-Come in!

Here are the notes for your morning patients.

-Good luck!

-Thank you.

When did you last eat?

Can I go soon?

I'm afraid that's not up to me.

How would you say your energy levels were?

Don't worry, I'm not going to make a run for it.

In your condition, I very much doubt you'd be able to.

When was the last time you saw your GP?

Look, I need to find out if you're being treated for any illnesses.

Lucy, I'm trying to help you.

You're clearly very undernourished and I need to find out why.

Ask the people at the job centre.

-Why, what's it got to do with them?

-You try living off what I get.

Right. Well, obviously, you're struggling to cope.

And that means what, you're not eating properly?

As long as I get what I'm owed, we can manage.

So how did you end up in here today?

When can I go? I didn't do anything wrong.

Well, like I said, that's not up to me.

You said "we", "we can manage"?

My son, Rory.

And he has to do without food as well?

There's always a meal for Rory, I make sure he eats.

Even if it means you don't.

PHONE RINGS

-That's two straight for robbery.

-Right. Details.

-I'm not sure...

-We've got to get a squad car down there.

PHONE RINGS

What units have we got over that way?

There is help out there, you know.

I can give you some vouchers for the food bank.

Will they pay my debts off and the rent I owe?

No.

But they might be able to help, give you some advice.

Look, I just need to pick Rory up from school.

How much longer is this going to take?

Is there anyone else who can pick him up? What about his dad?

No. I don't want him around us, not any more.

Right.

Things aren't good between us.

Listen, it's just me and Rory. I can manage.

But I've got to get him from school.

All right, let me see what I can do.

I'll ask and I'll try and see if I can find out what's happening.

-Thanks.

-But I do need to take your blood pressure.

So can you roll up your sleeve for me, please?

Lucy, you need to roll up your sleeve.

-Lucy?

-I've got to go. Can you speak to them? Please!

-Dad!

-Hey, you!

I'm really sorry, I don't know what happened.

Thank you so much for calling me. I'll make sure he gets home,

his mum must have been caught out somewhere.

-All right. Thank you very much.

-Thank you. Bye.

-All right?

-Yeah.

So when you make your first million from that app,

remember where you heard it first, cos I want my cut, OK?

How are you getting on?

No problems at all, touch wood.

-Nobody's died on you yet, then?

-Sorry?

Oh, yeah. No, thankfully not.

Everybody is singing your praises, you're a big hit.

I'll put that down to the novelty factor, a new face and all that.

I dunno, maybe it's the "craic"?

Whatever it is, the patients love you,

especially the ones who normally see him.

Mrs Khan, how are you? Come on through.

She's nice, isn't she? Mrs Tembe?

His dad? You let his dad pick him up?

Why the hell did you...?

I don't care! You had no right to do that!

PHONE RINGS

-I tried to call you.

-Where is he? What have you done with him?

Don't be ridiculous, I've got him. What happened to you?

-The school couldn't contact you.

-Bring him home, Cameron, I mean it.

Why didn't you pick him up?

Lucy?

-I got held up, it weren't my fault.

-It never is, is it?

It's always someone else's fault, it's my fault or...

Just bring him home, Cameron, please!

I can't do that. Not yet.

Lucy?

Is everything all right?

He's got Rory...

His dad?

Do you think Rory's in danger?

No. No. It's just that Rory's with his dad now.

And he's all the way over in Selly Heath.

I've got no money for the bus,

I don't know how I'm going to get there.

Well, look, I'm going that way myself.

Why don't I give you a lift?

Come on.

"The target age range for complementary feeding is

"generally taken to be six to 24 months of age,

"even though breast-feeding may continue beyond..."

Two years?!

In Botswana, that is not unusual.

Not after they're toddling around, surely?

You would be surprised. Tragically, things are changing.

I'll bet the mothers don't think it's tragic!

Not having a baby with teeth clamped to your boob all day.

It is tragic for the poor malnourished children,

especially when they are most at risk.

Hey.

Bet you can't wait for tomorrow, cop an eyeful, eh?

Honestly, Karen, grow up.

What's the matter with him?

Perhaps Doctor Tyler realises how serious this is.

Unlike some people I can mention.

So I'd just carry on with the statins

and not worry too much about your movements.

They do seem to be a side-effect, but nothing to worry about.

OK? Was there anything else, Mr Briggs?

Um...

Lucy... Lucy!

-Lucy!

-Rory?

Rory, are you in there, sweetheart?

I think you should calm down.

Cameron!

Rory? Cameron, are you in there? Will you let me in?

Lucy, this isn't going to help anything.

Cameron!

Cameron!

Rob, it's me.

I think I might need you. I'm with Lucy Coombs,

-I've given her a lift to her ex's and...

-Cameron!

..I think she's about to kick off.

Will you let me in?

Well, I wish I hadn't gotten involved now, too.

Cameron!

The Wi-Fi's not that great back here.

No, it's fine, really, it's...fine.

Found something interesting?

No, just...you know, a bit of research.

Stood just there? Anything I can help with?

No, actually, I need to get back to, um...

Are you in the middle of a consultation?

Oh, Lord...

There's this guy sitting there with this rash, and it's red

and there are spots, you know?

But they look kind of hard and I just thought,

I know I've seen it before

-and if I could find it online...

-Such an amateur!

Thanks for that, that's really mature.

Hold up.

You say the papules, they look firm?

Give me that.

-Cameron. Cameron, are you in there?

-Lucy, I really think you should...

-I thought you were going to help me?

-I will.

But you need to calm down. OK?

Mr Coombs?

Mr Coombs, if you're in there, it's Doctor Reid,

from the Mill Health Centre?

I'd like to talk to you if that's all right.

Cameron?

Rory?!

Rory!

Lucy...

Lucy stop it, you'll scare him.

-Don't you ever...

-Stop it, Mum!

-..ever take my son!

Get him out of here!

Come on. Come with me, sweetheart.

Stop it, Mum!

Ro-Rory?

There it is! That's it, that's it.

Water warts, or Molluscum contagiosum.

Are you seriously telling me you've never come across this before?

You rookies are really unprepared, aren't you?

What do I need to know?

It's a viral infection common amongst kids.

This guy's no kid.

OK. He'll need to alert any sexual partners.

It's highly contagious, spread by close physical contact.

Treatment?

I'd be tempted to just leave it, it should clear up in time. OK?

-You should probably tell your patient all this now.

-Oh!

He's fine. He's watching TV.

Thanks.

What about the bruises on her arm?

It's the only way I can stop her, holding her until she calms down.

And how long have things been like this?

Things were OK until I lost my job.

She always had a temper, but nothing ever happened like this.

-And then it just got worse and worse.

-So you left?

I didn't have a choice.

And so she stopped me seeing Rory.

Why should I let you see him? You left us.

Cos it wasn't my fault!

Cos you were hurting me, Lucy, what else could I do?

Lucy, I've seen what you did to him...

I can manage. I can look after Rory.

Yeah? So what happened today?

Is she sick?

Lucy?

It wasn't my fault, I told you,

they said they were going to stop my money.

Something happened at the job centre, the police come.

I can't believe this.

Look, it's clear that you're not coping.

I want to help her, I do, she knows I do, I've told her.

No, you want to take my son away from me, that's what you want to do.

No, no, I really don't.

But I will. To keep him safe, I'll do that.

Yes, obviously, I understand how important it is

and I'd really love to go, but as I said, I'm absolutely snowed, and,

well... I mean, come on, is it really worth losing an entire day over?

Have you finished?

You're going.

Come on, Howard! It's a waste of time.

Well, I think that's where you're wrong.

I found the online course very illuminating.

-Seriously?

-Yes, you'll get a lot out of tomorrow.

I think you should go in there with your eyes wide open.

Well, you know what I mean.

-Why me?

-Why you? I'll tell you why.

Because you're a man with no kids.

If anybody is going to benefit from a day's training

on breast-feeding, then it's you.

Hang on, you're a man with no kids, why don't you go?

Because you're the doctor, not me.

Anyway, it's out of my hands, Zara's nominated you.

Zara? Why, what have I done to her?

Feel free to ask.

You think I could hurt him?

-You really think I could hurt Rory?

-I didn't say that.

-That's what you meant.

-He's not safe with you.

I'd never hurt him, never. I love him!

I know you do, but you loved me, too, didn't you?

And you still did what you did to me.

Look at me!

Look what you've done.

Lucy!

Lucy, the only way this is going to change is if you face it.

DOOR BELL I can manage.

You can't, can you? Not any more.

Where's Rory? I want to speak to him. We need to go.

Hello again.

Is everything OK?

Cameron?

I can manage, I can.

Cameron...

I want to report an assault.

# Leave me out with the waste

# This is not what I do

# It's the wrong kind of place

# To be thinking of you

# It's the wrong time

# For somebody new... #

Hey, Mum's going to be OK. I promise, all right?

# ..Crime And I've got no excuse... #

You're going to be with me now for a while, OK?

Rory.

Rory...

Rory!

-You did the right thing.

-Did I? He's going to hate me for this.

-What's going to happen to Lucy?

-The way she treated you...

That's why I left.

But I could put up with a couple of slaps if Rory still had his mum.

-But that's all over now, isn't it?

-Surely you must see...

I can't cope with him like she can, you know?

-This is all your fault, you said...

-Look, I know things are hard.

You don't have a clue, love!

Swanning in here telling me to report my own wife,

so my kiddie loses his mum, and she was a better parent than me.

What am I going to do now?

-Well, there are agencies...

-Shut up!

There's nothing out there, there's no money for nothing.

Unless you want to lend me a couple of thousand

to get the debtors off my back. No?

Yeah, I didn't think so. Now get out.

Get out!

Ah! You survived your first day in the surgery, then?

With no visible scars, which I'm fairly happy about.

I'm sure you'll be fine, seriously.

If there's anything you need, we're all here for you, OK?

Thanks, Jimmi. I appreciate it, I really do.

So...

Did you get that chap all sorted out?

We wouldn't want somebody not singing your praises, would we?

Al...

Thank you,

I owe you big time.

You spend 99% of your time either fantasising about or

fumbling with women's breasts.

I never fumble.

Stop!

Surely you'd rather have lunch with me than some cold-hearted computer.

So man up, Tyler, and get back on the horse.