While the Cat's Away Doctors

I was trying to talk to you last night but you fell straight to sleep.

So would you if you'd the spin class I had.

Well, I wanted to give you this.

It's my schedule for the next couple of days.

It's got the hotel's number there in case of an emergency.

I'll probably have my mobile switched off

-while I'm in the conference.

-I'm sure I'll cope.

Aren't you the least bit bothered I'm going to be spending

the next couple of days in a hotel? With Toni?

-I couldn't care less.

-Yeah, I can see that.

Or would you prefer me to be completely unreasonable

and forbid you to go?

No. I'll see you at the Mill. I've got to pick Toni up,

we're driving up together.

Do you want to write that down on your little schedule, too?

See you.

So, no Daniel or Toni for two whole days?

What's with all the courses this week?

Maybe Howard got a two-for-one special.

SHE GIGGLES

Oh! Don't you scrub up nice?

-Is it too much? It's too much, isn't it?

-What for?

-Have you got a hot date or something?

-I do, actually.

He's picking me up from work.

In which case, you look just right.

Tell me all about it - who is he? Where'd you meet?

-What's he look like?

-I'll tell you later.

-You'd better.

-Morning.

-Morning.

Morning.

LAUGHTER

Time to skip town, doll face, the law's on our tail.

I'm ready to die in a hail of bullets.

-Just as soon as I've finished this.

-Fair enough.

Is it weird I'm really excited about this conference?

Feel like I'm going on a school trip,

-without the wedgies and the Chinese burns.

-Who said without them?

Saddos.

Have you seen the schedule, though? It's pretty packed.

Looks like we won't have any time to practise our dance routine.

-Well, what about right now?

-What? Here?

All right.

THEY LAUGH

Hey!

-ALL:

-Ooh!

Oh, yeah!

HE WHISTLES

DOOR CLOSES IN THE DISTANCE

It gets better!

DOOR SHUTS LOUDLY

Oh, Dr Clay, your first patient has called to cancel,

and the one after is running late.

OK.

Are you OK?

Yes. Yes, I am fine.

You know, I'm sorry about the way things turned out with Josh,

but it's probably for the best.

-If you ever need to talk...

-That is very kind, Dr Clay,

but I think I just need to put it all behind me, and focus on my work.

My boy, my boy, you are playing with fire.

-What do you mean?

-Getting up close and personal with Toni like that.

It's a seductive dance, that's the point.

All I'm saying is she's recently come out of a divorce.

It's a dance routine. That's all.

I hope so, for your sake.

Hotels do funny things to people.

So how does it feel?

How does what feel?

To lose yourself in the eyes of Daniel Granger?

Does it make you go weak at the knees?

He's a handsome devil, I'll give him that.

He's a great dance partner, too.

You know what the best bit is?

-What?

-I bet it annoys the hell out of Zara.

Oh, no, she's fine about it.

KNOCK ON DOOR

I'm off now.

Have a good trip.

OK, will do. I'll call you later.

-Fine, but not too late. I think I might have an early night.

-OK.

-You ready to hit the road?

-Did you pack your ENTIRE wardrobe?

Shut up, it's not that much.

That's it, walk in front of me. That's how wedgies happen.

SHE SCREAMS AND LAUGHS

ZARA DIALS NUMBER

Hayley, hi, it's Zara Carmichael.

I know it's short notice, but I need some childcare for tonight.

-Hey.

-Hey.

Fancy a pint after work?

Yeah, why not.

I could ask Niamh to come along, if you want.

I wouldn't bother. She's got a date.

Really? Who with?

Who, where and when is none of my business, Jimmi.

I learnt my lesson the hard way.

Yeah, oh, well. A boy's night. Even better. Girls are rubbish anyway.

-Yeah, they REALLY are, aren't they? Girls suck.

-They totally suck.

LIFT DINGS

DOORS OPEN

-I was just texting you.

-Me, too.

-How do you like your room?

-Brilliant.

I just spent the last ten minutes jumping up and down on the bed. You?

Yep, hurled the TV out the window, raided the mini bar.

-Rock'n'roll.

-That's me(!)

Where do you think they're getting all their name badges from?

-At least I know your name.

-We'll have to stick together then.

-Ladies first.

-Thank you...

Gary Marsh.

You're welcome...

I do have a face you know.

And very nice it is, too, whoever you are.

Shame on you, flirting with handsome strangers.

Whatever do you mean?

Good morning, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to TYQ Investments.

-I'm so sorry, we're not bankers.

-Sorry.

-Sorry.

-Excuse me.

-Sorry.

-See you soon, Mrs Bailie.

-Thank you.

What are you doing here?

I want to see Mrs Tembe.

Afraid that's not possible. I think it's probably best you leave.

Not until I've spoken to her.

She has no interest in speaking to you.

It is all right, Dr Clay.

I will talk to him.

Dementia affects 820,000 people in the UK.

It's estimated there will be over a million people

with dementia by 2021.

Dementia costs the UK economy £23 billion a year,

more than cancer and heart disease combined.

Despite these astonishing figures,

dementia research is woefully underfunded.

-Hello, can I help you?

-Sorry we're late.

There was a little bit of a mix-up with the conference rooms.

Come on in, we're just getting started.

Welcome.

You'll find some reading material on your seats.

Now, where was I?

Two thirds of people with dementia are women.

One third of people over 95 have dementia.

We should've stayed with the bankers.

-I'll be right outside if you need me.

-Thank you, Dr Clay.

Thanks...

for agreeing to see me.

I'm sorry it had to be at work.

It seemed like the best place.

You do not have to apologise.

I came to say goodbye. I'm leaving Letherbridge for good.

There are 670,000 carers of people with dementia in the UK.

Family carers save the UK £8 billion a year.

Would anyone care to guess the percentage of people living

in care homes with some form of dementia or severe memory problems?

80%. That's right.

-I'm having flashbacks to being at school.

-I imagine that would be less traumatic for you than most.

Come on. Don't tell me you didn't hang out with the cool guy.

I was what you'd call popular, yes.

How about you?

Sure - acne, braces, a real hit with the boys.

Are you sure you wouldn't feel more comfortable down the front?

No offence, but you're cramping my style a bit.

Two thirds of people with dementia live in the community,

while one third live in a care home.

Would you like to sit down, Mr Robson?

No, I'm fine. I'm not staying.

I just wanted to say a few things.

I told my probation officer everything. How close I came to...

reoffending. It's on my record, I made sure of that.

-Good.

-I'm not taking any more chances. I can't.

They've finally found me a place in a rehabilitation centre.

I'm leaving tonight.

I just...

..wanted to thank you for trying to support me

over these past few weeks.

You are welcome...

Just let me finish, please.

I'm sorry for blaming you before.

That was wrong of me.

What I did had nothing to do with you.

I'm responsible for my own actions, no-one else.

We are all responsible for our own actions.

Perhaps when you have finished your rehabilitation,

you could write to me.

Are you serious?

I cannot see any reason why we cannot still be friends.

Friends?

What planet are you on?

I'm a rapist. When are you going to get that through your head?

-Hey.

-It's all right.

I know you wanted to help me before, and I'm grateful for that.

But what qualifies you to help anyone?

You haven't got a clue.

That's enough.

You hide in your church and...

..you talk about sin, forgiveness...

..but it's not how the world is.

-If you weren't so wrapped up in yourself maybe you'd know that.

-Time to go.

Bye, Mrs Tembe.

I'm fine.

SHE SIGHS DEEPLY

Go on, I dare you.

-Napkin.

-I'm sorry, what?

Napkin!

That's alluring.

Oh!

-It's disgusting. It's stale.

-Is that any reason to waste food? Stop being so fussy.

Have a frozen pie.

SHE SPLUTTERS

Salmonella sausage?

-Come on.

-Where we going?

-Come on!

-We're in the wrong job.

-Think it's too late to re-train?

-Thank you. When in Rome...

-To misbehaving.

Excuse me, are you meant to be in here?

It's all right, I can vouch for them.

This is Philomena from Accounts. And... Barney. Back office.

-Back office Barney, that's me.

-Fine, OK.

-Thanks again, Gary.

-No problem...

-Toni.

-Daniel.

That's a shame, Barney suits you.

You call me whatever you like, I'm starving.

-Is that him?

-Yes.

He's brought flowers.

Hi.

You look beautiful.

This old thing?

Oh... For you.

Thank you, they're lovely.

Sorry. Karen, this is Oliver.

Oliver this is Al.

Nice to meet you.

-You ready?

-Yes.

Where you taking her?

To my favourite little restaurant that's outside of Paris.

But, first, cocktails.

I know a place that does the perfect mojito.

Awesome. Good night, everyone.

-Do you want me to...

-Thank you.

Have a lovely time.

-MOCKINGLY:

-But, first, cocktails.

As GPs, you are usually the first to diagnose a patient with dementia.

You will be the first point of contact for the person

suffering the condition, as well as their family and carers.

It's important to remember that although it is part

of your job to refer patients to the appropriate specialist

or social worker, it doesn't mean you're wiping your hands of them.

On the contrary. It is precisely because it is the GP that

a person first goes to that they wish to continue this bond of trust.

Continuity of care is vital, particularly for the confused

and vulnerable, for whom a friendly,

familiar face can make all the difference.

This is Hannah.

Three months before she was diagnosed with

early onset Alzheimer's disease.

It was taken on Christmas Day, sometime in the mid-'90s.

She spent it with her family, doing all the usual things.

Unwrapping presents, cooking a turkey.

She didn't know it,

but it was the last time she'd ever be able to do it.

Hannah no longer remembers that Christmas,

or any other Christmas, for that matter.

She no longer recognises the faces of her husband and three children.

Her story isn't remarkable in any way.

It's simply a quiet, devastating event in the lives of everyone

who remembers who she once was.

Roger. we have a reservation for two.

-Can I help?

-Oh, thank you.

Thanks.

Let me.

Everything all right?

Yes, it's just I'm not used to all this...

Well, being taken somewhere so fancy.

Thanks. Well, then, it's up to me to introduce you

to the finer things in life.

You'll like the menu here, they've got a Michelin star.

And the wine list is superb.

You know, every six months the owner travels to France.

And he never sells anything he hasn't sampled personally.

Wow.

-Do you have a preference, or should I choose?

-No, choose away.

Right.

Now I REALLY need a drink.

-Yeah. Mine's a pint, thanks.

-Ha-ha, nice try, loser.

Hurts a little. What'll it be?

G&T. Large.

-That bad, eh?

-You have no idea.

-Same again?

-Cheers. I'll get the next one.

So, did you learn anything interesting about the future of banking?

Nope.

Did you learn anything at all?

Yep. Never leave my iPod at home.

-How about you guys?

-What did we learn today?

To make the most of life while we still can.

I'll drink to that.

Cheers.

-BOTH:

-Cheers.

DOORBELL RINGS

So, here's a question.

Have you ever taken your stethoscope and stuff home with you to...

you know, play doctors and nurses?

Have you?

Professional secret.

-I think that's a yes.

-It's definitely a yes.

So did you bring your doctor's bag with you to the conference?

I never go anywhere without it.

I think I'm going to turn in.

What? It's still early.

Yeah, I know. It's been a long day.

Anyway, I promised my other half I'd give her a call, so...

Fair enough. It's been a pleasure.

Likewise. You give banking a good name, which takes some doing.

See you tomorrow.

'Scuse me, can we get another couple of drinks here, please?

-Same again?

-Why not?

-Sir.

'Hi, this is Zara Carmichael,

'leave a message and I'll get back to you.'

Hi, it's me.

Sorry I haven't caught you in.

I love you and I'll speak to you in a bit.

OK, bye.

You OK? It's Daniel.

-I'm on your course.

-Poor you.

Don't say that, it's really interesting.

It's a disaster.

It's NOT a disaster. It's a little dry at times.

Maybe you could spice it up a bit.

Spice it up? It's dementia.

Yeah.

I suppose what I'm trying to say is maybe you could try

something other than just reading us statistics.

Because you're not really telling us anything we couldn't find out for ourselves.

I know, I know. What the hell am I doing up there?

I should just give everybody a refund and go home.

Come on, you've just got to take charge.

Stand straight, look people in the eye, and...and take control.

But nobody cares what I have to say.

-What difference does it make if I say it louder?

-I care.

That bit when you spoke about that woman... Hannah, was it?

That really touched me.

It was the first time I didn't have to strain to hear you.

Because you were talking about something real...

Something human.

It WAS real.

She's my mother.

Oh...I'm sorry.

You said she was diagnosed in the mid-'90s. You must've been...

15.

I was lucky in many ways. I had my dad

and two brothers to help cope with it.

Some people have no family.

No support.

Which is why...

I want to make damn sure the doctors they turn to are trained...

..and proactive...

And, most of all, compassionate.

I don't think the conference is over yet.

You obviously enjoyed it, then.

It was delicious. Hats off to the chef.

But, if I'm honest, I could eat more.

The portions are a bit small.

Well, we want to leave room for dessert, don't we?

Now you're talking. Do you want some more wine?

I'm so sorry!

No, no. It's fine.

I'm really clumsy, I'm sorry.

Accidents happen.

-And can we have the dessert menu, please?

-Yes, of course, sir.

I'm an idiot.

I'm always doing stuff like that. Going mental

and knocking things over and sending them flying.

What is it?

Um...er...nothing.

What's wrong? What have I done?

I'm just a bit surprised, that's all.

That you'd use the word "mental," knowing what I do for a living.

I just don't think it's right to make fun of people with

mental health problems.

I wasn't making fun of anyone, but myself.

But you're right, I was being insensitive. I'm sorry.

I should think before I open my big gob.

Forget it.

Now, how about that dessert?

So, what do you say we head up to my room for...another drink?

-And it would just be a drink, of course.

-Of course.

What the hell.

Just as long as you know, I don't normally do this.

Neither do I.

My friends go to Cougar Town all the time, but this'll be a first for me.

Cougar Town? How old do you think I am?

I don't know. 50?

-What?!

-But you're looking good, though.

-Great, thanks.

No, no, no, listen, it's a compliment.

What I mean is I'm really choosy

and I still want to do it with you.

Oh, hello! If it isn't back office Barney!

Mm. And looks like it's goodbye, gormless Gary.

'Doors closing.'

You and I are going to have a night cap.

I'm not having you going back to your room and moping all evening.

I could run a nice bubble bath.

And have a big Bridget Jones style blub over my abject humiliation.

So, a blubber bath it is then?

THEY LAUGH

Oh, dear. Look...

Here.

-Cheers.

-Cheers.

-Mm. Better?

-No.

Come on. That guy? He's not worth getting upset about.

I know that, it's just...

I'm not 25 any more.

And normally I wouldn't care in the slightest.

But tonight it felt kind of nice to be... immature.

OK. Let's be immature, then.

MUSIC STARTS

-Now?

-Yep.

-You can't be serious?

-Yep.

OK.

HE SINGS ALONG

Thank you for dinner. I had a really nice time.

So did I.

-I'm sorry about earlier.

-That's fine.

No, I feel bad. I really respect what you do.

I know that.

Look, Niamh...

I think the world of you.

-That hasn't changed.

-Your taxi's here.

Thank you.

And...

..I'd like to see you again, if you still want to.

That'd be lovely.

-Great.

-OK.

-Good night then.

-Good night.

ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS

Toni...

-I'm so sorry!

-That's OK.

-I'm so sorry.

-We've both had a lot to drink. It's fine.

-I don't know what came over me.

-It's all right.

-That was terrible, I'm a terrible person.

No, you're not.

It's not your fault that I'm devastatingly handsome.

Daniel, I'm so sorry.

It's OK, forget it. And I will see you tomorrow.

See you.

'Hi, this is Zara Carmichael,

'leave a message and I'll get back to you.'

Hi, it's me. Sorry I missed you.

I just wanted to say good night.

Wish you were here.

I love you.

Kiss Joe for me, yeah? Bye.

Let's go.

I feel like a new woman.

My work here is done then. Come on, I'll see you out.

Stop being so nice to me!

Why?

Because I made a complete fool of myself.

You can't be serious. A faith healer?

Fill Rebecca with your healing light,

cleanse her of the cancer that blights her body...

Fine, I'll be the only professional then, shall I?

Was it something I said?

THEY LAUGH