The Masoods adjust to life without Zainab. Will AJ be able to stop fooling around and pitch in with the rest of the family? Phil receives news about Ben's sentencing.
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That's just wrong.
I wasn't going to eat it.
Since when do you know anything about Star Wars?
Lexi's Moses basket.
No flies on you, eh, Pops.
What's it doing out?
Fixing it, aren't I?
She's coming home, remember?
I know. But it's an access visit, Lo. Only three hours.
You really want her to be asleep all that time?
This is for when she comes home for good.
Well, that might take a bit more time.
Nah, Phil promised.
It's just complicated.
He said he's going to get my baby back and I believe him.
Why? Don't you?
Yeah. Yeah, I believe him.
LETTER BOX OPENS
And that was just the cinema release.
-Mas saw Empire 18 times. He reckons it's a better script but...
Who do you think took me? He never told you about this?
No. What about Jedi?
We didn't see it. Not together.
It was 1983 and Mas...
Had other priorities.
Why didn't you tell me?
Tell you what?
You being a Star Wars fan? You were a geek.
I was never a geek.
Dad, I think anyone who watches Empire 18 times qualifies as a geek.
He's got a point.
I have to clean up around kids all day at work.
You and Mum teasing me all the time.
And, secretly, you're a nerd. What happened?
I grew up. That's what people do.
What do you think?
Yeah, it's beautiful.
Max, you weren't even looking. This is important.
Unless you want it to turn out like Christian and Syed's.
Babe, the wedding's two months away.
The bridesmaid fitting is tomorrow.
That's a conversation for your bridal party.
Yes, it is. And I would, except one of my bridesmaids is at school
and the other one's lying there auditioning for Britain's Got Lazy.
Hello? I'm right here, you know.
My mother's even less interested
in dresses than you are. And Rainie's...
Who knows where Rainie is.
Babe, I don't want to look at dresses cos I don't need to, all right?
Cos they're going to be beautiful cos you're beautiful.
And if they ain't, it don't matter
cos I'd marry you in a hessian sack.
Please. Get a room.
Right. I'm going to go and see my mum.
If she's still on that couch when I get back,
you'll be marrying me in a prison issue.
Lauren, get off that sofa, will you? Get dressed.
-Make yourself presentable.
Cos I'm going to give you a job. Go on, get up!
-TV IN BACKGROUND:
-'..Some of us are working our fingers to the bone.'
Let me just check.
Nope. She's out doing things, isn't she?
Dunno. She was being quite mysterious, to be honest.
-Thanks for keeping the chair warm for me.
-For Sharon, you mean.
Yeah, that too.
What, you didn't know?
Yeah, course I did.
That'll be why she was being all mysterious this morning.
You know what women are like about their significant birthdays.
Oh, and I hope you're not planning any surprise parties
cos she hates 'em.
Your dad is not in a good place.
He's not the only one.
So I thought we should do something to help,
like organise a cleaning rota.
Yeah. It says cleaning rota. Sadly, the rota part is missing.
I thought you could handle that bit. I'm more of an ideas man.
I knew I could count on you!
Where are you going?
I...am going to get a job.
OK. You might want to put some trousers on first.
A surprise party sounds lovely, Jack. Oh, I've got no idea.
Um, what does "significant" mean anyway? No! No, you can't ask her.
You never ask. A woman asking's even worse!
And the bailiffs stripped the place clean.
Glad they tied the knot, though.
Love conquers all.
Except the mortgage payment.
I don't know, Jack. You used to be a detective, didn't you?
Do some detecting. Bye. Men, eh?
Useless, the lot of them.
You here for a reason?
Yeah. Rainie. Have you heard anything yet?
If I had I would have told you, wouldn't I?
I don't know, Mum. Would you? Cos I've been asking you for weeks.
I'm starting to think maybe you don't want her at the wedding.
I've asked around all her old haunts. I've left messages.
What else am I supposed to do?
Maybe she hasn't got any of the messages.
Maybe she has and she don't want to know.
The way you two parted, she might need more time.
Hey, boys! How was Paris?
-Yeah, it was fine.
-Being married takes a while to get used to.
Give it five years. HE CHUCKLES
HE SIGHS About how you'd expect.
-Phil Mitchell own this place?
What's it closed for?
Since everybody who worked here was implicated in a murder.
So, he's not choosy about who he employs then?
You could say that, yes.
Syed, you heard from your mum?
No. Should I have?
Just hoped you might know where she and Kamil have gone.
What d'you mean gone?
I don't understand.
It's a Letter of Consent.
Yes, I know. I can read.
I don't understand.
-This says I agree Lexi should live with you.
Yes, but I don't agree. I should have custody. I'm her mum.
You're also on bail for ABH and suspected of neglect.
-I never neglected Lexi.
-But they think you did.
-And it's going to take months to prove otherwise.
-Is that true?
I don't know.
You promised you'd get Lexi back. This can't be the only way.
This is the fastest. It's the best way.
It's my way. I thought we'd agreed this?
Agreed what? Pops?
When you're ready, come and see me, all right?
I'll never sign away my baby.
It's not what you think.
Just get out!
Careful. Wind'll change.
Yes, well, that must've been what happened to Uncle Derek then!
Yeah, funny. This is pretty good. What's it for?
My stupid Dad's got me doing some stupid pitch
for a stupid advert to go in the stupid local papers.
What's so stupid about that?
Me. Because I can design the look, yeah. But the slogan...?
This is what I got, I got...Brannings Best Bargains!
Or Brannings Motors: We'll get you running.
No, see look, that's terrible!
D'you want some help?
What do you know about advertising?
About as much as you.
OK. You're hired.
Look, I wanted to tell you but, I just didn't know how.
Like this. "Hi, Lola, Phil's promised to get back your baby
"but only if he gets to keep her."
-He is her granddad.
-And what are you? The Pied Piper?
I'm the bloke who has to watch you every time
they take Lexi back to some nameless, faceless foster parent.
It breaks my heart watching them break yours.
C'mon Lo, don't you see,
at least this way Lexi will be with people who love her,
while we fight your case.
Trish is coming today, yeah? Talk to her.
Maybe sign up for that parenting class she keeps banging on about.
I don't need to take lessons in how to love my baby, you know!
-You've got to show willing.
-Yes, but you said you believed in Phil.
Do you trust him?
-Lo, please! Lo!
I'm sensing you were expecting someone else?
What do you want?
A job. I'm a mechanic in need of an employer.
I hear that you're a employer in need of a mechanic.
So...match made in heaven.
Well, I'm not currently implicated in any murder inquiries.
Please! I'm sorry. I have a...thing.
Makes me say stupid things.
I can't promise it won't happen again because it probably will.
I'm unreliable, irresponsible, insolent, quite lazy.
But...my family are going through some really bad stuff
and I just need to help somehow.
I'm also the best damn mechanic you'll ever meet.
I don't ask questions.
The best, eh?
I dunno, do I. 50?
HE LAUGHS All right, calm down.
Only cos you said it was "significant".
Jack, honestly, mate, who cares how old she is?
Why don't you just ask her?
All right, I'll see ya later.
Jack is throwing a surprise party for Sharon.
The surprise being he doesn't know how old she is.
-Why doesn't he just ask her?
No, no party for you. Not until you sort all this out.
Right, what you got?
Brannings: A Brand You Can Believe In.
Yeah. Not a bad start.
I like the concept. Just the message, got to be a bit sexier.
Another victim out there.
Sexier, Lauren, yeah?
Welcome to The Arches.
You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and...
Sorry. That's my thing again. Star Wars.
We must be cautious.
It's a motorbike.
It's a 1980 Suzuki, GSX 250cc, four stroke,
parallel twin cylinder...
Boo-yah! I told you I was the best.
Any tools and spares you can find in here you can use for free.
Anything else you actually need, you have to pay for yourself.
Get it running, the job's yours.
You've got until the end of the day.
I know as much you do, OK? I came home.
Mum and Kamil weren't here. Dad said they'd gone.
She ran away? Or he threw her out?
-I don't know! He's not talking about it.
-Are they breaking up?
It's not your fault.
Isn't it? Tambo.
Did you know Dad was a Star Wars fan?
He saw Empire 18 times. AJ saw Star Wars 17 times.
But Dad never saw Jedi.
Mum's gone, Dad's not talking.
Why on earth are you and AJ discussing Star Wars?
Because Mum's gone. OK? Because Dad's not talking.
Because you lied, you cheated and ruined everything.
So don't you think we'd be grabbing at the chance
to talk about anything other than what happened?
You should probably go.
-Tam? You OK?
-No, you're not. Is it your back?
Syed, I said I'm fine. OK? You don't get to care.
Not so soon.
Cora, how much are these?
£3.50 for two.
£3.50? But I've only got £2.
Then that's what they cost.
-Keep the money.
They're for Lexi.
Dunno what the point is anyway.
She'll probably come back in someone else's clothes.
-And they'll probably be designer.
-You're giving up?
You don't know what it's like.
Yes, I do. My Rainie's an addict.
Has been for years.
Every single night I go to bed and wonder if the phone's going to ring.
If this time they've found her.
Maybe I didn't fight hard enough, early enough.
Don't make that mistake.
You expecting that phone to ring with bad news again?
I dunno. What I do know is Rainie's got my messages.
Why the hell hasn't she replied then?
No idea. And I'm not sure I want to find out.
Come on, what does that even mean?
Not being funny, but it's a car lot! What's sexy about that?
I got Brannings Bangers.
No. Max's Meaty Motors?
SHE GIGGLES Hey. You should do it more often.
He's right. It's nice to see you smiling.
Actually, it's nice just to see you...sitting up.
Hilarious. Oh. Yes! It's not about sex, is it?
No. It's about love. You love your car, don't you?
-You make a commitment to it.
-Going to write that down.
She's up and ready.
That's funny. I didn't see a bike. And didn't hear an engine neither.
It won't turn over. It just needs a valve. 35 quid.
Then find 35 quid and you get a job, don't you?
I haven't got 35 pence, mate.
Those were the rules. "Easy peasy", remember?
If you don't mind, I've got a party to go to.
Trish. You're early. Where's Lexi?
She's not coming, Lo.
What do you mean she's not coming?
Lexi's poorly. It's not serious. Just a cold.
But it was decided that it was best not to move her
from where she was comfortable.
And you think she'll be more comfortable with someone else.
What is it with you people? What did I do?
Sheez... Tam, that is all kinds of wrong.
What are you doing? Spying on people now?
I had no idea it was that bad.
Yeah, it's that bad. That's what fire does. It scars. And it kills.
What, do you want a closer look?
Tam, stop. It just...took me by surprise, is all.
Did you get your job?
-Not quite. I...
-Did you even try?
Was there actually ever a job in the first place?
Why are you still here? You know what Dad's going through.
He doesn't need parties or cleaning rotas,
he just needs someone he can rely on.
So, how about you just go, run away and leave us alone?
Branning Brothers: A Commitment to Excellence. A Commitment to You.
That's good, Lauren.
That's really good.
Drinks are on me.
Right. Line 'em up! Luce, you in?
No. It's a bit early for me.
What's that supposed to mean?
Nothing. Just what I said. Right, I'm going to call Tyler.
-What's her problem?
-Babe, just get yourself down here, will you, please?
Is that Tanya?
Yeah. Did you find out how old she is?
Could always cut her in half, count her rings.
Here we are. Shh, everyone. She's here.
Tamwar. What's up?
Uncle AJ. He walked in on me checking my scars.
And I kinda lost it at him.
Yeah, well, I'm sure it'll be fine.
No, like, you don't understand.
-I was really harsh.
I kind of told him go. To run away. And he did.
What is that?
What do you think?
What a piece of junk.
She'll make 0.5 past light speed.
Want to ride?
I was doing all the right things.
Look, I even signed up to your parenting classes.
That's a really good step. I know it's difficult.
But you must be patient. And you must control your temper.
I brought something for you. It was taken today.
When it was decided Lexi couldn't come, I went over so I could bring
a little piece of her to you. I know it's hard.
But you have to believe me.
We all want what's best for Lexi.
So you got a job?
What's your next trick?
Tam said you saw the old...
-It's pretty grim.
It's not that. It's not...
What you, your family, have been through.
What you're going through. I don't know how you all do it.
How you all cope.
I really don't. I'm not sure I can.
HE LAUGHS AGAIN
It's not some sort of test, AJ. You can leave.
No-one's going to blame you.
If you have to toss a coin over a decision like this,
your decision's already made.
I've got to get back to work. I'll see you later?
See ya. Another one?
-OK, what is your problem?
-What do you mean?
You treating Joey like dirt.
No, I'm not. He's working, he should keep his distance.
Yeah? Well, I know who I want to keep my distance from.
Yeah. For the record, I hate surprise parties.
I tried to warn him. Still, nice for your 43rd, isn't it?
Yeah. That's why I like him.
-I've got to go.
Good riddance. She was treating you like dirt.
No. She's just venting. It's nothing.
Venting about what?
I kissed her a couple of weeks ago.
S'pose she got a bit hung up about it, that's all.
What? But she's got a boyfriend. You've got a girlfriend!
All right, Lauren. It was nothing serious, was it?
She was getting all in my face, so I thought I'd prove a point.
Hey. I really liked today. We should do it again.
MASOOD: I was the only one that wanted to be Luke Skywalker.
Everyone else wanted to be Han Solo.
-Arrogant, wasn't he?
Yeah, but he was the coolest one.
Why has this flared up?
It's just a slight contracture, OK. I hadn't been keeping an eye on it.
You can't afford to do that.
Well, I've had other things on my mind, Dad.
So you never saw Jedi? That was 1983.
That's when you married Mum.
Yeah, she had different tastes in film.
You changed for her, didn't you?
I loved your mother very much.
I LOVE your mother very much.
Is she coming back?
Yeah, of course. She's just with friends.
Just having a little break, that's all.
-HE CLEARS HIS THROAT
-Mind if I cut in?
You don't have to.
Yes, I do. I want to. Well, I don't want to.
But I do have to.
-It's OK you get used to it after a while.
I see your point.
..it does look a lot like the Emperor's face,
all lumpy and full of gravitas.
Say something, Emperor, Go on. Blah, blah blah Dark Side.
Does this make me your Padawan now?
Let's not mention the prequels.
What made you change your mind?
Who said I have?
Well, you're here.
Look at it.
Do you love her?
She's a baby.
Does it matter?
It will if you betrayed her.
You wouldn't notice but this is Lexi rolling over.
I was looking for it before she left
but I never got the chance to see it.
What are you doing?
I missed that moment in my baby's life and I won't miss another one.
Here you are, mate. You can have that.
Ah... Have I got any post today?
What date is it?
The date is the 23rd.
You see, end of the month, the bills keep rolling in.
What are you going to do today?
Today? Find a job, pay my share.
Well, you don't have to worry about that,
because we have got the magic jar.
We've got enough to last us at least a...week.
Well done, it's your first day and you're already late.
What do you do in that bathroom?
What can I say, the ladies expect a certain standard of grooming.
Now you're an employed part of this happy household,
I thought you might want to contribute to the family finances.
Oh, I'm quite happy with this no payment,
no residency rights situation.
I'm a teaching assistant with a few postal rounds in a week.
I can't cover all the costs.
If you do a job you love,
you're always going to be taken advantage of.
Oh, weren't we supposed to be doing something today?
I don't think so... We could have a lads' night?
I'm sure we're supposed to be doing something today.
Jimmie. It's Phil. Change of plan, meet me at the cafe instead, yeah?
And don't keep me waiting.
Yeah, it's beautiful,
but ordering one for Rainie's jumping the gun ain't it?
Why? She's a bridesmaid.
You know what she's like.
We don't know where she is, and when she wants to disappear...
Do you think she's back on it?
Good, because I want her at my wedding.
LOUD KNOCKING ON DOOR
All right, all right, calm down. What's the matter with you?
Blimey. Banging on the door.
Oh, all right, Phil?
-Yeah, yeah, yeah, they've left.
-Yeah. The Border Agency guys.
-I thought they was old bill?
No, no, no. They got a tip-off about, you know, the decorators that you got in.
Reckon they were illegal.
-And you gave 'em my address?
-No! No course I didn't.
They came here first. Phil, they've got your address.
They know about the R&R, the Arches...
If they come back asking any more questions,
do what you do best, just play dumb. All right?
Phil, hold on, mate. It's you they want to talk to, isn't it?
They're going to be back in a couple hours.
Go on, hit it.
# Hey Tam, yo! It's your birthday, oh!
# And we're going to celebrate with a glass of OJ, oh no, oh yes
# That's how we roll, yo yo. #
-What you doing?
-What you said.
-No, you're doing it wrong.
-I did what you said.
-Come on, seriously.
-Can you just stop, please?
-What's wrong with you, man?
I'm not doing the whole birthday thing this year.
Oh, is it cos your restaurant went bust?
Oh, cos you're missing your mum and Kamil?
Who told you about that?
Denise may have mentioned it? Cos...I went to see her....
At the...Minute Mart...
to go buy some...fabric softener.
I just wanted to say sorry to hear about your mum and that.
It's well sad. But it's your birthday, he wrote you a song and everything.
-I'm sure it's lovely.
-No, it's not lovely. It's hard-core. Hit it.
# Hey Tam, yo! It's your birthday, oh!
# And we're going to celebrate with... #
Will both of you just stop? Please, not now.
So when do you reckon they'll let me have Lexi?
I wouldn't go painting the nursery just yet.
Once we file the application to the court, they'll appoint
a lawyer to look into your personal life, home, work...
What's going on with Shirley?
Going to be a lot easier convincing the courts you're the right person
for Lexi if you're in a stable relationship
with people who can support you.
-She ain't an option.
-You'd at least look like you're a happy family.
We don't need her, all right?
You're a recovering alcoholic with a son on remand for murder.
You're hardly a poster boy for the social services.
If you can't handle this, if you're out of your depth,
I'll find another brief, all right?
I'm on top of it.
Good. You better be.
Look, there's no reason why social services should get to know about
your health issues, but keeping Ben out of it's going to be difficult.
Couple of teas to take away.
-Nothing else we need to address?
The slightest whiff of anything illegal or unpleasant,
proven or otherwise, and social services will run a mile from you.
I'll test the water and see what they throw back at us.
If we can convince them you're a model family man,
I'm sure they'll let you have the kid.
Ah, Patrick, lifesaver.
Man, I'm starving. Denise cooking breakfast?
No. Thanks to Zainab, she's working full time at the Mini Mart,
so I'm cooking solo.
Don't worry yourself about me, I'll get something down at the cafe.
No, no, don't go, don't go. I need some help.
SHE YAWNS DRAMATICALLY
Good morning. Could you finish laying the tables, please?
I'll be with you in a minute.
Thought you'd forgotten about me. Where do you want me to start?
The Merc, take it down the breakers' yard.
-You want me to see if I can get it past the MOT?
-No. I want it lost.
When you get to the breakers', only speak to Micky. Tell him to box it.
No paperwork. Give him this.
Whatever you say.
When you've done that, you can have the rest of the day off.
This Suzuki. Can I have it?
Have it? It's worth over a grand done up.
-Yeah, really. But take it as it is,
you can have it for 500 quid.
500 quid's a bit steep for me. I suppose I could go to 350.
I can get my hands on 465, cash.
-Yeah, all right, go on then.
-If I find you working on it in my time you're out the door.
Good morning, your breakfasts are here. Yes, I know, your coffee!
So here we have half a full English, thank you, beans on bread.
Yes, I know, your tea is coming. It's on its way. It's coming.
Babe, you all right?
They're just so demanding. Food, drinks, bread!
-Babe, it's a B&B.
-My back's hurting me.
-Seemed like it was all right last night.
Yeah, well, I didn't want to say anything.
It's been hurting me for some time now.
Sounds like you need a good soak, babe.
But I've got to do the I got breakfasts...
Babe, look I'd love to help but I got to go to the Vic.
I've got some slow-cooked lambs to sort out.
-Right down there.
All right, all right, all right.
Tell you what, I'll sort these breakfasts out,
I'll run you a bath but I can't stay too long, all right?
OK. Yeah. Thank you.
-You might be getting a visit.
Nice to see you too.
What have you been up to?
Nothing. It's just some decorators I used at the Vic.
Show 'em an invoice, prove you thought they were legal.
It was a cash job. It was two coats of emulsion and a coat of gloss.
I didn't ask for their life stories, did I?
Didn't pay them with these then? They're fake, counterfeit.
We must have at least 500 quid's worth.
Nothing to do with me.
Won't mind if I go to the police then, will you?
No old bill and no publicity.
I don't want any trouble being stirred up for me.
Never worried you before.
I never tried to get care of anybody's kid before. Lexi.
You? I thought the idea was to help Lola?
And the best way to do that is to offer to have her.
How are you going to bring up a baby on your own? DOOR BUZZES
Have you forgotten how hard it is to bring up children?
Well, I'll make it work.
As long as everyone remembers that I'm the perfect family man,
who never gets into any trouble.
Get rid of 'em.
I'm just on my way out. I'll come to you.
Lauren. Your mum's on the war path.
You're meant to be at home doing this fitting.
-I'm sure whatever she's chosen...
-Home! Now! Don't be cheeky.
-Yeah, not too bad.
Very pleased with the ad you done, by the way.
Well, the ad we did.
Here, Max, I reckon you could utilise my skills out the car lot.
Well, whenever I want an ad, I'll give you a shout.
Not advertising, sales. You're out there on your own now, aren't ya?
Reckon I could make the perfect junior sales executive.
Joey, I've got a car to drop off. Come and see me after that, yeah?
Lauren, got time for a coffee?
-Home, now, please.
Maybe later then.
Look, we will get him a present.
It'll take more than a CD and some aftershave to get him to forgive me.
He's your brother, he'll forgive you.
Because he's a very nice man, from a really lovely family.
-Mad, but lovely.
-Well, congrats on your big day, guys!
I love a wedding. The flowers, the dresses...
The dresses that...the other guests wear.
Babe, don't worry about it. Syed went full out, veil, tiara,
30 foot train.
-I'll see you at the Vic later, yeah?
Fats wants to take Tamwar for a birthday drink.
Course he does. And yes, you will see us later.
-Cool. See you later, guys.
-See you, babe.
-We can't go.
Well, apart from destroying my family, I haven't got him a present!
how about something like this?
He's 22. He's not about to retire.
Might be good for interviews.
Don't think it's a good idea to remind him he hasn't got a job.
-Why don't we ask him himself?
So what do you want?
What do I want? Nothing. I've got everything I could possibly want.
I am going to go to McKlunky's finest cuisine,
and see if they've got any vacancies for failed restaurateurs.
We are going to find him something perfect, all right?
You all right, Phil?
It's your lucky day, your chance to be a hero.
You've got to tell them Borders Agency geezers
it was you that hired them decorators.
How's that make me a hero then?
-Taking one for the team.
My team, which is the only team you need to worry about.
Phil, listen, I've got my licence to think about,
any more trouble with the old bill and they could take it off me.
You won't need a licence if I get nicked for this, cos you
won't have a pub to worry about, or a newly decorated flat to live in.
So what do you think?
Yeah, yeah, they're all right.
They're a bit long.
I did think the neck line was just going to be a bit lower.
You're bridesmaids, not pole dancers.
Anyway, not being funny,
but everyone's going to be looking at me.
-All right, girls. You look lovely.
-Oh, hello, what you doing here?
-I'm interviewing him for a job.
-Yep. I need an audience.
Jay was a gopher, this is sales.
It's a special skill, not everyone can do it.
Well, if you can do it...
Excuse me, Joey, I've had years of experience.
Years and years and years.
Everyone thinks they can be a salesman, don't they?
-He's got a big enough gob.
-It does help.
That and lying.
What you talking about, lying? We might embellish but we don't lie.
Lies are like sales warranties. Come back and bite you, don't they?
-Right, you show me what you can do.
Yeah. Go on, I'll make it easy for you, all right.
Abi believes everything she's told. Sell her that motor.
That's not true.
Nah, nah, I'd rather have a challenge, thank you. No offence.
Madam, I see you're very interested in this car, nice choice.
Great body work, lovely lines, nice souped-up little engine.
-Some say that you get what you pay for.
-But not what you always deserve.
-What you doing?
It's only rain, you're going to get that as a salesman, carry on.
Nice one, thanks.
Perhaps madam would like to take her out for a test drive to see
how elegantly she handles in the wet?
Who underwrites your guarantees?
Excuse me, no trick questions.
All our previous customers have been satisfied.
Perhaps you'd like to read some of their feedback.
-Ooh! Positive customer feedback!
-Will be once I've written them.
Writing your own reviews. Why does that not surprise me?
You're right. Words are cheap. Nothing compares to the real experience.
So how about I take you for a little test drive
-and show you what all the fuss is about?
Definitely a chip off the old Branning block, ain't he?
Yep. Yep, he's definitely a Branning.
-All right. You start tomorrow, on commission.
I hate to let a sale go.
What's wrong with you?
What is your problem?
Your dad just offered me a job.
You and Whitney?
It was just a kiss, Lauren.
Well, when are you going to tell Lucy about it then?
Why would I do that?
He's got a lot on his mind.
What with your mum and that? Sorry, Tam.
That's all right. And thanks for the birthday rap.
It's all good in the hood, bruv.
You know, it's your big day, ain't it?
That's the thing, I don't want a big day, I just want a normal day.
A small day.
I want my wife to go home to, Mum nagging me about the restaurant.
Here, Tam, listen mate, did you ever have any
employment issues in your restaurant?
Oh, duh, mate, sorry, I'm being insensitive.
-Listen, top bhuna by the way.
Just wondered if you ever had any staff problems with people who...
-People that...shouldn't be working?
-Why would we?
No, no reason, just that maybe you employed people that
weren't from round here.
Round here? Yeah.
Oh, we did, we had a guy, he was from south London.
Well, that's disgraceful. I'm sorry.
No. All our staff were British, taxed, NI.
Hold tight. Are you looking for cheaper bar staff?
-Why, do you know any? Oh, I'm only joking.
-Hey, come on, man!
-I'm just about getting by already.
-At least you've got a job.
How do you fancy, this is an idea, OK?
How do you two fancy earning a score each?
-You're still here?
-Yeah. Wanted to keep it tidy.
OK, now here, this is a shopping list,
you're out of almost everything, babe.
Also the guy up in room five, he wanted to stay another night,
and a dude from Manchester rang about a deal on a month's stay,
-and apparently the radiator in the bathroom's leaking.
On the brighter side,
I found this when I was clearing out the bins.
-A little present for you.
Everything OK? I mean, anything I can do?
Nah, nah, we're good.
Look at that, look. Nice, innit?
Oh, you found it! Cora's bracelet.
Man, she is going to be pleased with me.
Thank you, honey, thank you. Yeah, man.
Babe, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, but I've got to go.
All right, thanks.
-Hey, what you doing?
It's not all there, the last pages are missing.
All right, all right, calm yourself down.
I got it in the market and it's about two bunnies,
one big one and one small one and they look after each other.
Don't get yourself all worked up.
No, cos I thought Lexi was my little bunny.
I thought it was a sign and that she would come home
-and everything would be all right.
-It will be all right, I can fix it.
No, you can't!
She's going to have a proper book
with all the pictures and nothing missing.
I can make that brand new!
We can write our own ending, can't we?
I wanted to read it to her, when she come home.
That might not be for a while yet.
Phil's going to get Lexi home soon, right?
Listen, Lo, I wouldn't rely too much on Phil at the moment.
He means well but...
He's still got a lot on his plate, hasn't he?
What with Ben, Shirley leaving.
At the end of the day, it's down to us now.
Me, you and Lexi. Our own little family.
Things ain't going to change overnight.
KNOCK ON DOOR
-All right, Phil?
-Anyone been asking after me?
Asking after you? No. Why? What's the matter?
Just wanted to make sure no-one's been
poking their nose into my business?
-Why would they?
Just so long as we all remember to play happy families,
everything will be fine.
You can count on us.
Bought it for Lexi down the market but the poxy thing's broken.
Well, if you want some books...
Go up to Stratford, get her some new books, yeah,
-nice ones, with pop up pictures and all that sort of thing.
-I'll catch you later.
-See you, mate.
Looking good, nephew.
Looking perfect, I'd employ 'em.
Well, as we rehearsed, I did. Well, actually Phil did. Don't forget.
Is this actually legal?
It's not...illegal, is it? It's probably a bit...un-legal.
Amazing, so what happens if they want to interview us?
Nothing to worry about. You're all legit, aren't you?
-Good! Well, there's nothing to worry about.
Yeah, but we don't want to get him busted on his birthday, man.
It's your birthday. Why didn't you say?
All right, mate. Look. Well?
This is it? Your great master plan?
Yeah. We'll just tell Immigration our decorators here
are 100% British kosher and whoever grassed em up must be racist.
-Yeah, it's got its flaws, but...
-Just get out of here, please.
-Now! Get out of here!
-Go, go, go, go!
-All right fellas, you OK? All good?
We still haven't been able to find Mr Mitchell.
I know, see, now, what I need to tell you...
You didn't try very hard. I'm Phil Mitchell.
I need to talk to you about some work you had done a few weeks ago.
I think you'll find that my tenant
can answer all your questions.
Yeah, I can do that, that's good. Any questions you want.
Like, the meaning of life, is there a God, will West Ham win?
Sorry, I know what you actually want to talk about, the decorators.
Funny, it's an interesting story, right...
Before I do tell you, this won't affect my drinks licence, will it?
Alfie, shut up, will you?
-I employed the painters.
-So you're legally responsible, Mr Mitchell.
I believed they were kosher.
It's your job to check every employee has a right to work here.
It's our job to prosecute people who use illegal labour.
Sorry, I'm late, Mr Mitchell, busy day.
Here's the paperwork for the decorators.
What does this have to do with you, Mrs Rickman?
It's an invoice, from the company Mr Mitchell employed to do the work.
Sorry, couldn't find it earlier.
You do realise that the men you were using were illegal?
Mr Mitchell paid a British registered company in good faith.
He did not enter into any direct negotiations with the labour
and therefore cannot be held responsible for their employment status.
That is correct isn't it?
We will look into this a bit further. We'll be in touch.
We will get the invoice back, won't we?
Only, the tax man will need to see it.
Take care, fellas. All the best.
Sharon, that was brilliant. Well done.
Why didn't we think of that?
Because it's the truth, the law.
Maybe we should try it. Drinks on the house.
How'd you get hold of get the invoice?
I had to pull a few favours. But it's a one off, Phil.
Do not get me involved in any of your schemes again. All right?
You got five minutes?
Going for a drink with Tamwar, you want to come?
No, no, not in the Vic, somewhere private. It's about Joey.
So I was thinking, if you guys got some spare time,
the front of the house could do with a coat of paint.
-Funny, really funny.
-Hold tight, man, we could do that.
-Are you being serious?
-You haven't had any better offers, have ya?
It is looking a bit grubby, ain't it?
Mind if we join you?
Yeah, of course, let me get you a drink, Syed?
Orange juice and lemonade.
Good Muslim. Christian?
Now you're married, does that mean you're my nephew in-law?
We got you this. It's about the greatest ever stand-ups.
Oh, right. Silly me, I went to look for you at the Arches,
but, no, you're here buying drinks with my money.
-I'm not buying drinks with your money.
-Deny you took it then.
No, but I'm not buying drinks with it, I bought a motorbike with it.
-Oh, well, that's all right then!
-For... Tamwar's birthday.
What? Oh, it's the 23rd.
What's going on?
Your uncle has bought you a motorbike with our jar money.
You bought me a motorbike?
I thought we could do it up together. He forgot!
Can't believe you forgot.
Tam, I'm sorry, I feel awful.
What's he doing here?
He came and he brought me a present, OK.
You invited him?
I didn't invite him.
You sit there with him after everything he's done to our family!
Dad, I didn't invite him! I didn't invite any of them. OK.
I didn't invite him, who buys me a motorcycle,
which is practically the vehicle that my wife left me on.
I didn't invite the world's worst birthday rapper
or his beat-boxing sidekick.
I didn't invite the lunatic who's decided to join our family
or the brother who sank the family business and then let me
take the fall for it.
And I didn't invite you because you forgot my birthday.
I didn't invite any of you. But...
I'm still glad you're here.
Cos this is all I want for my birthday.
Us all sitting around, pretending to be normal over a drink.
So I'm going to go wild and get some dandelion and burdock.
-Just a lemonade.
It's all going to be all right, you know that?
No, it's not, but we'll get through it.
I didn't tell the police about the forged notes.
I didn't do it for you. It's what's best for the club.
I just want Lexi growing up amongst her family.
One hell of a family.
Could be. Could be a great family.
Not unless you've got relations I don't know about, Phil.
Social Services, they'd love you, wouldn't they?
I mean, you're great with kids, you're reliable...
If we was a couple, you and me,
Lexi'd be back in no time at all, wouldn't she?
Except we're not a couple.
We could be.
Right, you better wash all that up you know, when you're done.
No. Chefs don't wash up!
-Oh, I'll get that then, shall I?
Yeah, you get that.
-Excited to see Lexi then?
-Yeah, if they actually turn up this time.
She'll be here.
The more I seem to tidy up this place, the worse it gets.
-I mean, look at the state of that furniture...
Do you mind popping round later? When Lexi's here?
Erm, Abi's skiving off school so we can go bowling.
She's going on a school trip for three weeks, ain't she, so...
Jay doesn't need to be here, it'll be fine.
Yeah, you're right.
Now I've got Phil Mitchell backing me up, I roll hard, innit?!
How'd you get it?
She got arrested. She got into a fight about a month ago.
Tell me the old, old story.
Now, when this turns out to be a disaster,
you did not get this number from me.
I owe you.
Rainie? It's Mum.
I've thought this through, Phil, and I can't get involved.
-It's a big deal.
-What, putting your name down on a form?
Lying to Social Services. Pretending we're a couple.
I have moved on from this stuff.
Without you we ain't got a hope!
What am I supposed to do, Sharon,
pretend that this is some family home, or something?
I mean, have a look around you, will you!
I need you, Sharon. That baby needs you.
Don't you dare put that on me.
I'm sorry. I can't do it.
Yeah, all right, babe, I'm only two minutes late. Give me a sec.
-I swear the bridesmaid dress has actually given me a rash.
It would be the bridesmaid dress
and not that jumper you haven't washed since your dad used hair gel.
-Weren't that long ago.
-What's he doing here anyway?
Come to get this lovely reading material.
You want me to read both of these? Today?
Dad, give him a chance.
He'll need to learn how to read written English first.
Yeah, very funny. Not just the pretty face, eh?
Comic voice of your generation an' all.
You're lucky. Most people get one bible, you got two.
-Now, go on, get going.
-All right, see you later.
Get your dad to stop texting me, will you?
-I'm not choosing a best man yet.
-He's not choosing him anyway.
Hello, Mum, you come for your breakfast?
Or have you got some news for me?
No, cos that would mean you'd actually done some digging.
You have heard something.
Course I haven't.
Mum, the toast's burning.
-I'm not making any!
Heaven forbid you should actually deal with it yourself, Lauren.
Was that Nan?
Yes it was. Looking for a free meal.
Does that remind you of anyone?
You all right, Phil? You look troubled. Care to unburden yourself?
You all right, Jack? You spoken to Max?
-Alice. You look lovely. Gorgeous.
-Stop messing about.
What you talking about, Derek?
About this best man thing?
Oh, yeah, he did mention something. Cheers. What was it?
-Gone. See you later.
See you later.
-How you going? You all right?
Phil! They're bringing Lexi round later.
-You'll pop round, right?
-I'm busy round the Arches.
You should introduce yourself to Trish. You're the grandad.
-I doubt that'd help.
-You can't just say that and then say...
Listen, I ain't a miracle worker, all right.
Social Services want a family. And we ain't a family.
You giving this place a lick of paint or you skipping school?
Can you get hold of Denise's car today?
You're taking me to see Rainie.
You can keep saying it didn't mean anything till the end of time,
they're not going to see it that way.
How am I going to tell Tyler?
No, you got to tell Lucy first. He's using her, Whitney.
-After everything she's been through.
-So when's your break?
-You can't preach, Lauren.
You slept with Darren the night before his wedding.
Yes, I know, so I'm talking from experience.
Yeah, and you sound like someone's mum.
-Whitney, when's your break?
Well, there you are!
I've been waiting at the bus stop like a lemon for 20 minutes!
You can't get me to ditch school to hang out and then ditch me!
SHE CLEARS HER THROAT
Jay, has something happened?
-Think we should burn it?
Don't start just cos I said no. You've got a visitor.
Ritchie wouldn't let me back in the office till I found you.
I was beginning to think I'd...
If I'd wanted to talk to you, I'd have answered my phone.
Anyway, forget about Lexi.
I don't need Social Services sniffing round my house.
Here, if this is a guilt trip it's not working!
I'm not here about Lexi! I'm here about Ben.
CPS have dropped the murder charge.
They're going to sentence him for manslaughter, Phil.
Yeah. It's over.
How is it over?
Well, there's no trial now.
So I haven't got to testify.
I haven't got to be the one to send him down.
Oh, that's amazing, isn't it?
You don't sound like it's amazing.
Well, it's almost like none of this needed to happen.
Getting kicked out and all that.
Do you think...do you think Phil will be all right with me now?
Why do you care?
Because I'm unemployed, and I'm living at a B&B.
What, so you'd just go back to him?
I'm not saying that.
-Well, what then?
-I don't know!
Where are you going? Jay, talk to me.
This is good news, isn't it? I don't get it.
No, you don't get it.
Is she clean?
She'll find a way to turn this into a crisis.
Get angry. Get drunk.
You sure you want to put yourself through that?
I'm not doing it for me. I'm doing it for Tan.
She wants Rainie brought back into the fold.
You want me to come in with you?
I think I can handle my own daughter.
That's what I'm afraid of.
What's that supposed to mean?
You know Rainie. You've got to deal with her the right way.
And I can't manage that?
You got to admit, Cora, you can be blunt.
-Stop the car.
This is close enough. I've been handling Rainie for years.
Blunt happens to work. Now, stop the car.
-I can't do this.
-No, you have to.
-Why do you care?
come on, she's got a bonkers dad, she's got a little brother to
look after, she's got loads of businesses to run.
You've got to, she needs to know.
Needs to know what?
Right, I'll leave you to it, yeah?
I need to know what?
It's a start. Everyone around the table, no-one died.
Exactly. Least before they hated me. Now Dad just looks broken.
Baby steps. We gatecrash tomorrow. They can't chuck you out at Eid.
Nah, we'll have our own feast. 'Bout time you were fully initiated.
You got a text.
Going to answer it?
It's a text, Christian, it's not a 999 call.
I should go and see him. Tell him that he's a dad.
-You lost your right to an opinion when you turned your back.
Your life is not my responsibility!
What if...I don't know, what if... What if he was going to marry Lola,
would that help with getting custody?
Would it? I mean, the CPS are saying it's an accident now.
-Well, say that Ben wants to have Lexi in his life -
and he's going to be out in about a year.
Phil, you don't know that.
They'll get married and and live with the grandad. Me.
That's got to mean something, hasn't it?
It's a lot better than what we got now, innit, you know!
A dad who's banged up for murder and a teenage Billy Mitchell for a mum!
Sure, sure, sure, sure. It's just...
Well, you know, I heard Ben was...
You heard what?
I'll try and get him to agree to a meeting.
-This is madness.
-This is none of your business!
Babe. Listen, do you reckon you can get tomorrow off?
Somehow I doubt it.
Bloody Mary, darling.
Look at them two together.
She should be with her mum.
She's getting bigger.
She's being well fed.
I fed her well. You're the one giving her colds!
I was simply letting you know she's being looked after.
I'll get that.
Where's he going...?
What you doing here?
She was in a state this morning. She had make-up all over her face...
Just shut up, will you? Just shut up and listen.
Now, Ben, he's being done for manslaughter.
So he could be out inside a year.
-Yeah, it's good news. Good news all round.
It'll be even better if that kid's got a proper family.
She's got one.
I'm talking about a mum and a dad. Married.
The judge might go easier on him.
-Social Services will love it, won't they.
-No, you don't. Phil! Phil!
Listen, she was gutted this morning, all right.
Let's just keep quiet till we know what's what.
I'm not having her having any more knock backs.
Well, keep your phone on
-and I'll call you the minute I've heard from him.
This is a serious amount of food.
Well, yeah, that's the point. TEXT ALERT
So have I got to get all dressed up for this thing tomorrow?
Yeah. New sari should do it.
Thought you'd never ask!
She'll forgive you.
Yeah? What about Tyler?
Well, at least Joey will get a kicking.
He's going to dump me, Lauren! Don't you care?
Why do you hate him so much anyway?
Five minutes ago you thought he was the business.
That was before he messed with us!
D'you know what the worst thing is? I can't stop thinking about him.
After all that you've been through to be with Tyler?
I know. I just can't stop myself!
Well, you better sort yourself out, Whitney, OK?
Because he is not Ryan Gosling.
You're not betraying a friend for the spawn of Derek Branning!
When you think about it I should be the best man.
I was there when Max was born.
I taught him to ride a bike, I gave him his first dead leg.
Oh, I bet he remembers that fondly.
-Hey. Come in.
Do you want some lunch? Dad's making some.
Actually, I was wondering if I could have a word? About Joey?
-Yeah, sure, what do you want to know?
-Dad, she's asking me.
Well, I know a thing or two about me own son as well, you know.
I was there when he was born.
You were around when everyone was born. What was Jesus like as a baby?
Good as gold. Slept through the night and loved his mother.
All right, I get the message. Girls' talk.
Eat that sandwich.
Did you ever meet any of Joey's girlfriends?
One or two.
What was he like with them?
Have you guys fallen out?
No. Just interested.
Well, it's difficult with Joey, really.
Cos even if he really likes somebody, which is hardly ever,
except for with you obviously...
Erm... Well, he's just not very good at showing it.
-Like, it's hard to tell.
I suppose there is one thing.
When he was younger he really liked this girl
and he was always putting her hair behind her ear.
Is everything all right?
Forgot the mustard.
So what's a high-powered businesswoman like you
doing with a bartender anyway, eh?
Actually, he's working at the car lot now.
What, Max's car lot? Since when?
Did you know about this?
My name's Olivia. I'm Rainie's sponsor.
She's drinking? Or she's not drinking and that's why you're here?
No, she's fine. She gave me this to pass on.
Rainie thought I should wait while you read it.
In case you had any questions.
I see you got AJ working here.
Got manslaughter then.
I won't have to testify.
No, no, I suppose not.
Was there something you wanted?
I just thought you might want to say something about it all.
Not really, no.
Course not. Silly me, eh?
I told you that I'd call you as soon as I've seen Ben.
Has Lexi gone back?
Nah, they've gone for an ice cream.
Me, Lola and Lexi, well, we got this bond.
Like I used to have with Jay.
See, they're my family, I love them and they love me.
OK, there's this blip with Lexi, I mean,
but that's all it is, it's a blip.
-It's nothing that I can't handle.
-What you trying to say?
It's about Ben.
I don't want Lexi growing up with a dad who's inside for murder
or manslaughter or whatever.
It's not fair, she's a baby. She's innocent.
-He's her dad.
-Yeah, well, he don't deserve to be.
He's got a right to know.
Can you just forget what Lola said.
Forget? Forget that I've got a granddaughter?
Telling Ben. It might help him but it won't help Lexi out.
Five minutes ago you wanted me to have residency.
I never wanted you to take them away from me.
I asked for your help, that's all. They're my family!
Our family. Our family. I'm the grandad.
And you, you're the great-grandad.
I love being the bearer of good news.
Seems the manslaughter charge has thawed Ben's heart.
He's agreed to see you. 3.30 today.
I've just spent the last three hours reading, d'you know that?
No great works of literature,
no fancy lines I can use to melt your heart. No.
I've just spent the last three hours reading, Lucy.
Tips for selling used cars.
You kissed Whitney?
Well, yeah...sort of.
Are you kidding me?
There are kisses, aren't there, and then there are kisses.
This was just a party kiss, weren't it. A bit of a laugh.
So it was a joke, was it?
Who was the punchline? Me or her?
-You make me sick!
-I make you sick, do I?
What I've done after being in a relationship for 20 seconds
isn't half as bad as what you've done after being friends
-with her for years, is it?
-That's your defence?
No. My defence is that it meant nothing.
It was the most meaningless act in the history of the world.
Yeah, well, it means something to me.
Yeah, and I tell you what, Tyler's going to kill you.
-You going to tell him?
-I thought we were serious.
Lucy. Lucy, just dump him!
Could you just leave please?
If I go now Lucy, I'm gone for good. Do you understand?
If you can flip over this, what will you do when something serious happens, eh?
You can find somewhere else to stay tonight.
Yeah, yeah, Lucy, I got my new job in the morning, haven't I!
So how long you been her sponsor?
Couple of months. If you'd rather take it with you...
You know what this is about?
Rainie mentioned a wedding?
Her sister, Tanya's. She wants Rainie to be a bridesmaid.
She explains everything in there.
We've seen Rainie through every addiction she's ever had.
And all she can do is send a letter?
She felt it would be easier to communicate her feelings this way.
What about Tanya? How's she supposed to communicate her feelings?
Well, she sent you.
Don't get cute with me.
Maybe you're worried what it might say?
You going to school?
-Thought I'd make the last lesson at least.
Are you serious?
It's a lot to take in, Abs.
Well, if you want to go running back to Phil, I'll never get it.
I don't. I want to go bowling with you.
Yeah, that's right. Bowling with you. For ever and ever.
And I want to drink loads of cola and eat loads of sweets
and slide on them shoes.
I don't want none of the other stuff in my life.
It's all poison.
So please. Come bowling, eh?
Well, you can't bowl for ever. You'd get sore thumbs.
She's rejecting Tanya?
-This is why I never told Tanya I was coming.
I knew she'd pull something.
-Please try to see her side.
-She should never have invited her!
She invited Rainie because she wanted to include her.
Dresses. Photos. The occasion.
But the Rainie we know and love,
she'd have been propping up the bar all day long.
And then she gets paranoid because nobody likes her
and then she gets jealous because it's not about her.
Please, you need to finish the letter.
Then she has another drink. And another and another.
And then we get to the part Tanya never thought of.
The fight. Cake on the floor. Vomit down the dress.
The day in tatters.
I'm sure if she went she'd behave. That's not the issue.
-I deserve a conversation!
-Well, she doesn't want to have one!
Finish the letter.
Why would she take the dress with her?
All I know is I don't know nothing - it's just the way I like it.
Excuse me, is that right that you gave my Joey a job?
All I know is I don't know nothing - it's just the way I like it(!)
Yeah, well, it's a free country, innit.
Oh, so it's true then?
Yeah, it's business, Derek. If he's good at selling, I need him.
Like you say, it's a free country.
Just thought that I could rely on my brother to be...
Oh, Del, don't be like that. Course you can rely on me.
You're my big brother, aren't you?
Yeah? You're the main man.
Yeah. Yeah, the best man.
-It's time I was getting her home.
-I'm not done with her yet.
That's not your decision to make.
Oi! Here you are.
I ain't having you turn your back on her. She's your granddaughter.
-What are you doing?
-You're upsetting Lexi.
What would you know?!
You tell her you're not going to help us.
You tell her you're going to let her rot in some stinking home.
Go on. Look at her in the eyes and tell her.
Tell her you're not going to help us.
Oi, what's going on? You all right?
Listen, let me take her. I'm going to see Ben.
Prison? I'm not having her anywhere near that place.
Neither are we.
Don't listen to him, all right. She ain't marrying Ben.
Married? I ain't marrying Ben!
I think it's time we were leaving.
Yeah, yeah. Trish is right.
I don't want all that in her life, Phil.
That's worse than foster care! I just want your help.
She's beautiful. I'll tell him.
No... Please don't tell him! Please! I just want your help.
Please don't tell him! Please! Please don't tell him!
You forgot this.
Are you OK?
I can imagine it's hard to read.
You should be happy for her.
She hasn't drunk in 41 days.
She's got a boyfriend who loves her. She's doing well.
So what am I supposed to tell everyone?
Show them the letter. I don't think she'd mind.
She didn't want to be found, or put in this position.
Her sister's getting married.
And she was so happy Tanya wanted her as a bridesmaid...
But she has to make everything about her.
It's not about her, it's about you.
She's a coward!
She just can't be around YOU. You trigger her behaviour.
Please don't contact her again.
Cora. Cora. Wake up now, man. The guests and them are coming down for breakfast.
Where am I?
I was in the bar.
How's the hangover?
-It's the middle of the day!
-No, no, no. It's the next morning.
You rolled up here last night,
wouldn't leave the sofa, so I left you to it.
-The next morning?
-Uh-hmm. I'll get you some water.
-So you can't remember anything at all about yesterday?
-KNOCKING ON DOOR
Get rid of her. Don't let her see me like this.
-Yeah, OK. Hi, Tanya.
-Sorry to bother you so early.
-It's all right. To what do I owe this pleasure?
You haven't seen my mum, have you?
-She normally comes to ours for breakfast.
-She didn't this morning.
-When I see her, I'll tell her you're looking for her.
Yesterday, she went off with Rainie's bridesmaid dress. I haven't seen her since.
She'll turn up. I have a gut feeling.
-If you hear anything...
-Yeah, yeah. Bye bye.
You didn't have that dress with you when you turned up here last night, you know.
-Next time you get Yas a dress, can we take a vote?
I had to get her something new to wear.
-She's going to look like a strawberry.
-She will not!
She'll look like a fine, upstanding member of the Masood family.
We should go round.
We haven't been invited.
Besides, I bought all that food.
-And we're going to the park.
You know, every year, Dad gives an envelope with cash in it.
Do you see anything on the door mat?
-First thing he does after morning prayer
is give out that money.
He loves it.
Being the big man.
I've ruined that.
-We should go round.
-We're going to the park.
Daddy's got a new dress for you.
Do you think he told him?
What do you want?
I've got 15 toothbrushes at home that I don't need
and nothing to fit this phone.
-You haven't got a charger for it, have you?
-Try the one by the kettle.
Take it with you.
I, er... I didn't tell him.
You're right. Lexi don't need that in her life, does she?
We'll just have to find another way of getting her home.
But what are you going to do about Ben?
I'll see you at the club in an hour, yeah?
Bring the phone with you.
See, the trouble with speeches is, it's striking the right balance.
I mean, if this was a room full of geezers,
then it would just roll off the tongue.
But there's ladies present, see.
With their delicate sensitivities.
-And you don't have delicate sensitivities?
-Nah, sold them for scrap.
Has Max actually asked you to be best man?
I'm not that stupid. Make us a nice cup of tea, eh?
Warm my aching bones.
There's your phone.
Any of you know how to get tea out of a shirt?
-It's been a nightmare since the missus left.
-You want lemon and what's it? A bit of vinegar.
-Are you joking, eh?
Now start talking.
With you deciding not to tell Ben,
which was, of course, entirely right and correct,
the application's in pretty bad shape.
At the very least, we need a better support network
and we need it by half four.
Oi, you promised me the day off.
I've got a couple more orders to do.
Oi, Phil. She's been nicking out the till. You want to sack her.
What about Sharon?
-Could do with a woman's touch.
-I ain't having her involved.
She'd be perfect!
Sharon was never perfect.
Look, go home! I'll meet you in an hour.
I promised Ian I'd drop by, too, OK?
Go on. Out.
Ian, then. Uncle Ian!
-He's only been off the streets for five minutes.
-Yeah, but they don't know that, do they?
He's got a house. He's got businesses.
-The three of us... It's a family.
-Ian ain't married either, is he?
But he's got cousin Lucy and cousin Bobby in there.
Surely it's worth a shot, Jimmie?
I mean, unless you've got a better idea.
Sort yourself out, will you? Look at the state of you.
-You look like you've been sleeping on a bench.
Is it terminal?
Nah, just a period of adjustment, that's all.
-What's she adjusting to? Your uselessness?
-Very funny. I'm going to sell that one today.
Don't run before you can walk. Start with that one, please.
If I can sell that, I can sell anything, can't I?
Look at him. Look. He doesn't care, does he?
He will by the time I'm finished with him.
Let's go find Lucy.
Lucy, I'm allowed to worry, OK? I'm your dad.
Can you please just open the stall?
And Joey didn't come home last night. Is everything all right?
Ian! Ian, come on, we need your help.
-The kind of help only an uncle can give.
-Are you cooking?
Today, you are Zainab. I've left a few of her clothes on the back of the bedroom door for you.
Yeah, Eid, a time of giving, prayer...
fathers forcing their sons to cross dress.
-I wonder what it is.
-It's not much.
Can't a father give his son some money without being patronised!?
You see, your domestic situation is such that it'll be, you know,
more palatable for social services letting Lexi come home,
knowing you're a part of her life.
-You know I'm having counselling, don't you?
-What kind of counselling?
-The social don't know that, do they?
-It's... It's a couple of things.
My wife to be, she left me
and then I went and things went from bad to worse.
I had to sign the businesses over to my daughter,
-so I haven't really got anything any more.
-you're Lexi's uncle. Lucy is her cousin.
-What does Ben think?
You wouldn't have to have her round here, all right?
She'll live with us. You're just going to be a name on a form.
-Are you OK?
-You only care about the people who pay you.
Are you going to help?
-Knock, knock! The door wasn't locked, so I...
Ian's agreed to help us get Lexi back.
You do know Social Services are going to want to interview you?
It can be quite...
-I'm not sure he should get involved.
Well, that ain't a surprise, is it?
Jimmie, see to the paperwork. I'll meet you at the pub later.
With my dad like nothing's happened.
I didn't sleep last night.
Right. That boy, he needs to be punished.
I can guarantee you, this thing will never break down.
Could be a nuclear war and you'll be left with cockroaches
and these motors, yeah?
All that radiation, most probably be cockroaches driving them and all.
-You've got a deal.
-Sound, mate. Nice one.
Yeah, well, just getting warmed up. You got the paperwork on this one?
-Yeah, 'course. It's all right, I'll take over from here.
-Mind if go grab a coffee, then?
Yeah, go on. 20 minutes.
-Hi. Max Branning.
-All right, mate.
-We've got a deal, yeah?
Congratulations. Right. Follow me. We'll do the paperwork. You local?
Yeah, just down the road.
-Do you remember the feasts we used to have?
Table disappearing off into the horizon.
You were only five then. Everything looked big.
So many people.
Great(!) Just draw attention to the emptiness of the house. Good work.
You think Syed's going to turn up?
-He'd need an invite first.
-Great. That's in the spirit of things.
-If he comes...
I won't turn him away, but actually go round and invite him...?
Great. What's he supposed to do, Dad? Develop telepathy?
Shouldn't take too long. Only another billion years of evolution.
Yeah, we're not big on evolution in this house. Dad, if you're OK
with Syed being here, call him. What's the difference?
He bankrupted the family. He knows what we're doing.
He knows where we are. They all do.
If you build it, they will come.
You can't invoke Kevin Costner in the face of the family's demise.
You're right, Mas is no Costner.
I'm right here.
Costner built a baseball field.
Dad's chopping tomatoes.
I'm right here!
Look, we'll only argue. It'll just be really tense
and I want to enjoy married life a bit, you know?
Does this mean I'm forgiven, then, eh?
Where we going?
-What have you just done?
-Oi! Who do you think you are,
rocking up here, trying to mess with us!?
All right, Lucy. Don't be silly now. Come on, yeah?
-It's only a laugh.
-Oh, come off it, Lucy! You know I've got work!
-A day should do it.
-Er, the whole day?
-With any luck, it'll rain.
-Oh, come on, girls! Come on.
How old are you, eh? Eh?!
-Phil. Listen, my car won't start.
Yeah, but you're here, aren't you?
Please. Look, I'm taking Sharon on this picnic.
That's why I needed her to take a day off.
-Get a motor off your brother.
-Drive her around in one of those rusty hatchbacks?
-That's going to blow her away(!)
-We're closed and I'm busy. I'm sorry.
Oh, right. 'Course. Yeah.
You're closed and she loves surprise birthday parties.
You are in so much trouble.
WHISPERS: Is she in?
Yes, she is!
Have you got any idea how worried I've been, Mum? I've been...
Have you been drinking?
I don't have to answer to you. I'm the mum.
It only works...the other way round.
Have you got the other dress?
I took it round to see her.
-You found her? How?
She got arrested a couple of months ago.
-Jack gave me the number.
-So where is she? Is she nearby?
Is she sober?
She got arrested, Tan. What do you think?
I took the dress cos I thought I could persuade her.
And did you?
She tore it up. Right in front of me.
What did you expect?
We're better off without her.
Just, um... Just doing a spot of gardening, that's all.
You ain't got any bolt cutters on you, have you?
There is no greater bond than between the postman and letterbox.
Some things are just not that funny, AJ.
Just drop him an invite. You don't even have to see him.
Then if he doesn't show, he's the bad Muslim, not you.
This isn't a piety contest.
We didn't see each other for...years.
This is the moment you don't let that happen with Syed.
Otherwise, you're going to make up one day
and then wish you'd done it sooner. "AJ, wish I'd done it sooner." Right?
We've already lost Zainab and Kamil. We need him.
Well, you can wipe that look off your face
cos everything is going to be OK.
By the time we're done, half the square's going to be on that letter.
They asked for a family, yeah?
Well, now they've got themselves a dynasty!
-Good old Ian Beale!
These meetings with the social services, they won't be easy.
I'm sure they know what they're doing.
-Who? Phil and Billy? Please.
Look, are you sure you're in the right place to take responsibility
-for a little baby?
Yeah. It's mainly... It's just for the application, isn't it?
Don't you think Lexi deserves a bit more than a couple of names
being thrown onto a form?
-Is that... Is that Ben's number?
Why's he texting you?
"Please help me get my daughter back, Ben."
Phil's told him.
Phil's obviously given him a mobile phone when he last visited.
All right, Lauren?
Yeah, but I think Mum's a bit upset about Rainie.
-I think you should go talk to her.
-Haven't seen Joey, have you?
It's just he might be more trouble than he's worth.
I gave him 20 minutes off about an hour ago.
-You ain't going to sack him, are you.
-Well, I don't know.
I ain't going to just employ someone to take the mick, am I?
Oh. At last. Babe, am I happy to see you or what?
Right, what's this, then? The cavalry or something?
-You been crying?
What are you doing here? You come to let him go or something?
-I ain't got the key, have I? Came to gloat.
-Come on, girls.
-I think this conversation's a bit biased against me.
-He ain't worth it.
Yeah, well, maybe I'm not either.
-He's been there long enough.
I know that, um...
you know, what we did was awful and...
I feel awful. I feel sick.
Just look at him, Lucy, please. Look, he doesn't care.
He's playing a game.
How can you forgive someone who doesn't even ask you to?
Oh, you've got to be joking me.
Yeah, nice one. Thanks very much. Cheers, girls. Yeah.
Right, you. It's time for an Eid feast all of our own.
Look what I just found on the door step.
Someone's got the spring back in their step.
-All right, Max?
-All right, Del?
-Whisky, please, my darling.
-I've been working on my old...
-You haven't seen your boy, have you?
-I thought he was working with you?
-Yeah, so did I.
I hate to be an I told you so.
Yeah, looks like it(!)
That's no way to talk to your best man, is it?
I hate picnics anyway.
Yeah, well, obviously my car knew something I didn't.
-Do you want a drink?
-Brothers. Feeling in a good mood. What do you want to drink?
-I'm all right, thanks.
He's taking it well.
-Taking what well?
-Me being the best man.
-I thought you were best man?
Yeah, Del, about that...
Well, it's just he's got to be the best man, hasn't he?
-He's been there all the way through.
-I was inside!
Well, you couldn't do it anyway. Bride wouldn't turn up.
Oh, right. Well...
..don't I look the fool.
-Come on, Derek.
-It's all right, Jack. It's all right.
I'm useless at making speeches anyway.
See you later.
You had a change of heart yet?
Phil, leave Ian out of it. He's fragile.
I never thought I'd get to the day where I could count on Ian
more than you.
-I'm just saying,
you set all these places at the table, they're all empty...
I just get this...
-Overwhelming sense of loss?
-Any word from Zainab?
I suppose we're not expecting her and Kamil
to burst through the front door.
No, probably not, AJ. But what would you have me do?
Not bother? OK. Fine. You switch the TV on and we'll eat off our knees.
-No, it's pretty pointless if there's only three of us.
-I'll get it.
Dad, it's a proper feast, OK? Really.
Well, we just followed our noses
because something here smells delicious!
Wow. What a spread.
Oh, yes. There we go.
Thank you for the money.
You went round?!
If you build it...
You hungry, then?
Yes, we are. So why don't you talk us through?
Well, Christian, we have a range of curries here.
This is my personal favourite, Rogan Costner.
You know, there are some fellas that
get to be best man lots of times.
Me, I never thought I'd get a go,
on account of me being misunderstood.
But if there was one man...
..that I'd want to be best man for...
..it's my baby brother Max.
When he first came along, I was about nine.
I remember the day that my mother first introduced me to him...
like it was yesterday.
He hasn't changed much since then.
Still drags his feet and his vocab hasn't got any better.
But from that moment on, I loved him...
..which is why I stand here today in front of you...
..the proudest man alive.
You OK, Dad?
Thought I heard voices.
Just me talking to myself, as per.
You have a lovely day, sweetheart.
You faced the music?
This is what happens when you bring Rainie back into the mix.
Ruined the dress, upset Tanya...
Was it Rainie's fault you got drunk, too?
You know what she's like.
Kim found it. I couldn't believe my eyes.
It belongs to you, doesn't it?
If this is just another wind up, don't bother, all right? Just jog on.
I'm actually starting to quite enjoy it here, you know?
Bit of wildlife.
Why don't you just say sorry?
Don't you care about Lucy?
You're missing someone from that list, aren't you?
Is that all we are to you? A list?
Why do you pretend to be like this?
-Anyway, my dad's on the verge of sacking you, so...
That's why I'm here, innit? Didn't want us to surrender
the moral authority and I just want you to know that,
me and Whitney, we're going to do everything in our power
to make sure that Lucy doesn't take you back.
I do know why you don't want Lucy to take me back, all right?
You're just...jealous that Whitney got the kiss and not you, aren't you?
Phil. Can I... Can I have a word?
-Here I am. Just in time.
Right. We need to sign this and we need to do it pronto.
Well, this is it, Jimmie.
The clan. Minus Lola, of course.
-The nuclear family in full flow.
-Are we signing or what?
Can I have a word, please?
Look, I've been thinking about what I'd have to say at the interview
And I don't think I can lie, OK?
Because I'd have to tell them about when I was sleeping rough
I don't want it to be my fault that Lola doesn't get the baby back.
Who've you been speaking to?
Phil, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I can't do it. I can't do it.
Even for you.
Well, what are we going to do?
It'll take me a half-hour to get to court and they shut in 40.
-What's going on?
Put Sharon down...
-as my girlfriend.
-I thought you didn't want her involved?
Just... Just do it.
And put fiancee.
getting married now, are you?
Yeah, we are.
And we're going to spend the rest of our lives together.
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
The Masoods adjust to life without Zainab. Will AJ be able to stop fooling around and pitch in with the rest of the family? Phil receives news about Ben's sentencing and makes an impulsive decision that panics Lola. Cora is terrified about what she will find when she enlists Jack's help to track Rainie down.